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Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 12:47 AM
For those of you not in the know, Omegle (http://omegle.com/) is a site where on can have conversations with total strangers. Like chat rooms, but even more completely random.

I, of course, seized on this opportunity to do what I do best: be a smartass on the internet.

What I've posted below is about 10 minutes worth of completely improved conversations with random individuals. To said individuals, I offer my sincerest apologies. In all of these, I'm the "You".

Without further ado:

Okay, this isn't REALLY religion, is it? It's pretty silly, so nobody take it seriously.


Stranger: Hello, I am Jesus Christ
You: Huh, what a coincidence! Me too!
Stranger: No you aren't
You: Sure I am.
You: Prove me wrong.
Stranger: I don't need to prove you wrong
Stranger: If you wish to think you are
Stranger: I am in no way willing to stop you
You: Jesus Hermann Christ. I do birthday parties, gigs, Second Comings.
You: It's a real thing I've got going.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


D'oh, don't you hate it when you do this?


You: So I hid the bodies behind the shed. Cops don't poke around there.
You: Uh.
You: Wrong window.
Stranger: yep i realize that........
You: Uh.
You: Puppies?
You: They're, uh.
You: Puppies are cool.
Stranger: most of them....im a vet
You: Damn it. You've got a gun, right?
You: Geez, did it again.
You: Sorry, got a couple windows open and I'm...expecting visitors.
You: Kinda distracted.
Stranger: thats fine strange person..
You: Sure is, sure is.
You: So, I applied to veterinary college, but they didn't let me in.
You: Apparently, "euthanasia" isn't a valid specialization.
You: Who knew?
Stranger: how frustrating...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Well, this was a real enriching conversation. I feel so damn enriched.


Stranger: oh hai
You: This conversation better have nothing to do with mudkips.
Stranger: hahahahaha
You: And I mean that.
Stranger: nic one
Stranger: *nice
Stranger: Hate Pokemon
You: No, it was pretty nic too.
You: Reminiscent of the great Nic Masters of the 18th Century.
You: They're pretty underrated.
Stranger: i hear your mom is too
You: Yeah, she is.
Stranger: oh snap!
You: She's really good at lacrosse, but nobody recognizes that.
You: They just look at her and assume, just because she's a chimp, she can't play.
You: It’s kinda racist.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Short, but bitter.


Stranger: hey
25.m.co
you?
You: 1,432,324.m/f.undisclosed/classified
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Aaaand part deux.


Stranger: hi
You: Yello.
You: Man, I hate these humid spring nights.
You: Brings the gremlins out something fierce.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Well, this one's a sport.


You: Greetings, undisclosed internet person!
Stranger: Hey babe, come here often? 0.o
You: I am a deposed Nigerian prince seeking to offload some prescription gold coins
You: And need a willing host state-side.
You: Interested?
Stranger: Oooh! Shiny! Mine!
You: Excellent! You need to fill out this brief questionaire.
You: 1.) What is your address?
Stranger: 69 Your Mom Ave.
You: 2.) How much money do you have, not counting any assets that are well hidden?
Stranger: $5 and a gum wrapper
You: 3.) If I had one thing to use against you in a court of law, what would it be?
Stranger: where i hid the bodies
You: 4.) How quickly would you cave to blackmail, extortion, and people coming to kill you?
Stranger: 1.4 seconds. That's my average.
You: 5.) Who would miss you if you disappeared? Besides my sainted mother.
Stranger: Oh, yeah, she WOULD miss me... ;)
You: Unfortunately, you are NOT QUALIFIED by dint of being, in fact, not a person. That's right, jig's up. Your foul invasion will never succeed, reptillian overlord.
You: Thanks for replying!
Stranger: FUUUUUUUUU
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


How helpful!


You: Okay, hi, quick question.
Stranger: okay.
You: Does blood stain silk?
Stranger: yes.
You: Damn.
You: Okay, can it be cleaned out?
Stranger: I'd ask why, but I'd probably lose the game.
You: I, uh.
You: I...accidentally...cut...my finger.
You: And that stained...my...shirt.
You: Okay, second question.
You: This is hypothetical.
Stranger: YOU WEAR SILK SHIRTS?
You: If, hypothetically...
You: HYPOTHETICALLY.
You: You saw a person throwing out a bloodstained silk dress into a dumpster, would you report it?
You: In theory.
Stranger: No.
You: Okay, good.
You: Uh. Hypothetically good.
You: It's...it could be good.
Stranger: sick.
You: Someday.
You: I guess.
You: Anyway, thanks for being so helpful!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


This went on for a while, but this is the beginning:


Stranger: hello
You: Hello, fellow ordinary human!
Stranger: haha
Stranger: Why hello
You: Man, nice night to be a completely ordinary human being, huh?
Stranger: wait a minute...
Stranger: something is off
You: No, everything is fine.
Stranger: you keep calling me a human
Stranger: hahaha
You: Yes, because we both are.
You: There is nothing out of the ordinary.
You: Everything is very ordinary.
Stranger: is your name Tim Mo?
You: No, but that's exactly the kind of normal human name I would have.
You: Okay.
Stranger: hahaha
You: So, question.
Stranger: shoot
You: If, you know.
You: Hypothetically.
You: Your neighborhood was conquered by an evil AI.
Stranger: hahahaha
You: Would you submit, or have to be cleansed forcibly?
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: if I had no other choice
Stranger: I guess I'd go along with it
You: Excellent!
Stranger: hahahaha
You: That's good. Good to hear.
You: Well, this has been an awesome human chat.
Stranger: I cant believe we've already reached the technological singularity
You: So, what's your name, exactly?
Stranger: exactly?
You: I want to keep you in mind, in case, you know.
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: I'll be your narc
You: I mean. Just in case.
Stranger: my name is Tim Mo
You: Oops, gotta go.
Stranger: hahah
Stranger: wait
Stranger: please
Stranger: I think you're funny.
You: So did my mother.
Stranger: hahahaha
You: That was probably why she played a practical joke on me.
You: When I was two.
Stranger: what was that
You: She did this thing, right?
You: Where she left me in a ditch.
You: And didn't come back!
You: It was hilarious.
You: ...
Stranger: hmm
You: I guess you had to be there.
You: Or not.
You: In her case.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: you're clever
You: Eh.
Stranger: ehhh
You: Ehh-ing contest!
You: Or not.
Stranger: hahahhaa


Feel free to rip off my schtick take a crack at it!

Wolfbane
2009-04-06, 01:06 AM
Rutskarn...

You have reached a whole new level of epicness. :smallbiggrin:

Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 01:07 AM
Awesome, level up!

I'm thinking about taking Improved Initiative. Bloody useful, that is.

Divine Comedy
2009-04-06, 01:09 AM
I should go in there and ask everyone I meet "Rutskarn is that you?".

Wolfbane
2009-04-06, 01:10 AM
I should go in there and ask everyone I meet "Rutskarn is that you?".

Yeah, that sounds like a good idea. We'd probably meet sooner or later.

Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 01:10 AM
And when they answer, "Yes"?

Divine Comedy
2009-04-06, 01:13 AM
Well really that's the whole joke Rutskarn. But I'd hate to explain it to them.

Wolfbane
2009-04-06, 01:16 AM
And when they answer, "Yes"?

"Oh, thank God man. I'm on my way over. The girl OD'd and I need your help. If the boss finds out, he'll kill me!"

Yes, Pulp Fiction. :smallbiggrin:

or...

"Is the Incinerator warmed up yet? I gotta get rid of these credit card numbers before the board of director's find out its me embezzling it all. I don't have much time."

I'll try it out sometime. :smallamused:

Divine Comedy
2009-04-06, 01:17 AM
The desired reaction would be their disconnect. But if they said yes I'd question them about being a bisexual clown, or perhaps inform them that I know where they live and can see them right now.

Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 01:21 AM
Let me go ahead and try that out for you, DC.

Well. Okay.


You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: finally
You: Uh.
Stranger: I've tried so many users
You: Holy crap, seriously?
Stranger: never found you
Stranger: finally
Stranger: damn
You: Well.
You: Uh.
You: This is kinda awkward.
Stranger: lol, why?
You: ...well, I mean.
You: I am Rutskarn.
You: I had a post planned.
Stranger: damn
Stranger: haha
You: This.
You: This is.
Stranger: okey, lets start over
You: Good idea.
Stranger: haha
You have disconnected.

Okay, let's try that again.


You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: I'm still alive
You: Well, then.
You: Let's get down to brass tacks.
You: About that money you owe me.
Stranger: I swear I'll get it back to you
Stranger: asap
You: I've automatcially tracked your IP down to your address, so no funny business.
You: I've got a contract with Shakey's Brute Thugs-R-Us.
Stranger: ****
You: Yeah, that's right.
You: Tell you what.
You: I'm a gambling man.
Stranger: I'm at a vermont starbucks
You: I'll make a deal.
Stranger: and I live in los angeles
Stranger: ha
Stranger: shoot
You: If you can answer a question, I'll let you off.
You: If not...I take the money, and your toes.
Stranger: sure thing joe
You: Jim, actually.
You: It's Jim.
You: Anyways, here goes.
Stranger: nice guy jim,
You: Who were the two first brothers to achieve flight?
Stranger: The Wright Brothers
You: Wrong!
Stranger: Orville
Stranger: and
You: It was, in fact, the Mongolfier Brothers
Stranger: psh
You: They invented the hot air balloon.
Stranger: okay
You: Not many people know that.
You: Fun fact.
You: Anyway, Re: Your Toes.
You: Sorry 'bout that.
Stranger: actually, birdmen were the 1st
You: Pshaw.
You: That's just a hoax.
You: Perpetuated by reptillians.
You have disconnected.

Coidzor
2009-04-06, 01:25 AM
...Dangit, Rutskarn! You're making me want an omelet now! :smallfurious:

Dragonus45
2009-04-06, 01:45 AM
Now i have something to do all night, thanks a lot.

The best i've managed so far. (the typos are on purpose)

Stranger: hey
You: Hi are you rutskarn
Stranger: no
Stranger: who's rutskarn?
You: a gu
You: guy*
You: he owes me mony
You: i wnat to find him an kill him
Stranger: hahaha
You: hes a zombie so it wont last
Stranger: where you from?
You: giantitp
Stranger: excuse me?
You: giantitp
You: its a small country near tiawan
Stranger: it's taiwan
You: thats what i said
Stranger: you a girl?
You: i wish
You: then i would have easy acess all the time
You: *HIGH FIVE*
Stranger: oh snap

DraPrime
2009-04-06, 01:52 AM
Rutskarn, I dream of having a conversation with you.

Coidzor
2009-04-06, 02:31 AM
Rutskarn, I dream of having a conversation with you.

me too... He's just so dreamy...

Boo
2009-04-06, 03:50 AM
Stranger: to die by your side
Stranger: is such a heavenly way to die
You: To love is one way of putting it.
Stranger: eh?
You: Foreshadowing of such events is cataclysmic for writers since it becomes evident that the person has no idea of what they want in life, nor in death.
Stranger: ya trick ya?
You: Why such harsh words fowl beast? Thyn eyes bewitch and bemuse me with glorius ambition, yet thou hath no heart for such feelings!
Stranger: The Horror!
You: True horror comes from the stem of facing the knowledge that wisdom is inadequete in the life, and only one such as Gene Wilenhiem knew of such things.
You: But he is dead now, and so am I. Alas, this poor world was not meant to have such a relationship!
Stranger: quotation after quotation
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I haven't a clue what they're talking about. By the way, Gene Wilenheim probably doesn't exist. I was going to reveal my love for the fictional man too. I guess it was never meant to be.


Stranger: HEY GURL
You: I like omelettes!
You: Do you like omelettes?
You: I love cheese omelettes…
You: Bacon omelettes…
Stranger: Sorry. i Hate eggs'\
Stranger: ewwww bacon
You: Mushroom omelettes…
Stranger: cheese yay
Stranger: mashroom yay
You: Spinach omelettes…
Stranger: yum
You: Seaweed omelettes…
Stranger: ewww
Stranger: no
You: Shrimp omelettes…
Stranger: nooooo
You: Pea omelettes…
Stranger: meh
You: Pistachio omelettes…
Stranger: maybe
Stranger: nahhhhh
You: Pancake omelettes…
You: Beef omelettes…
Stranger: ewwww
Stranger: double ewww
You: Dog omelettes…
Stranger: yummm
You: Salmon omelettes…
Stranger: ewwwwww
You: Pizza omelettes…
Stranger: yummmm
You: Dragon omelettes...
Stranger: i want pizza
Stranger: yay
Stranger: scaly
You: That’s when you kill a Komodo Dragon
You: Cut it up
Stranger: yeah
You: Roast its innards
Stranger: ...
You: Bake its eyes
You: Then deepfry the testicles!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

The conversation would have gone on, but I guess they didn't appreciate my taste. For no reason, here's the rest of what I wanted to say!Once that’s done, you grind it all up in the roof of the skull, and spread it over the omelette while it’s frying!

It’s delicious!

Oh! And I like cabbage omelettes…

Green omelettes…

Those are a bit off, but I don’t mind!

Poulet omelettes…

Omelettes with a dash of donkey hair (it’s really quite good!)

Maybe some omelettes with deer milk instead of the usual goats milk…

I didn’t mention plain omelettes, did I?


Next up is... well, I'd rather not say. There are very angry and racist people on the internet who think they know what your skin colour is the second they start talking with you. Instead, I'll see if I can redo it with someone else... no, that didn't work either. Angry, angry people.

Well, let's test this one out: (WARNING! NOT APPROPRIATE FOR PEOPLE UNDER THE AGE OF... something. It's somewhat sexual, and has a number of swearwords in it.)Don't say I didn't warn you! If you're under the age of... thirteen or something, then don't read it!
You: Dear Journal
Stranger: Mood: apathetic
You: Today at the track I met Johnny
Stranger: OMG I LOVE JOHNNY.
You: We chatted for a while, and had lots of fun together.
Stranger: He's soooo cute!
You: Later, he led me behind the portables, and...
You: He kissed me.
Stranger: How sweet!
Stranger: I love Johnny! So romantic.
You: It was so soft, so luscious...
Stranger: So sugary...
You: he slowly cupped my genitals with his hand.
Stranger: how hot.
You: It was like nothing I had ever experienced before...
Stranger: So very, very hot...
You: Unfortunately, a teacher caught us.
You: Mr. Landsworth.
Stranger: Damn that git.
You: He brought us to the principles office, and looked red in the face.
Stranger: The principal screamed:
You: I thought I saw steam coming from his ears.
Stranger: D><
You: When the principle called us in, we were giving each other little glances every now and then.
You: We didn't care, we were in love.
Stranger: Hoping to sneak another kiss while he wasn;t looking...
Stranger: Dude, this is a cute journal. :3
You: The principle asked the stupid teacher to leave so he could talk with us privately.
You: He was really creepy when he asked too.
Stranger: He seemed to...
Stranger: LEER at us...
You: I don't know how to describe it other than say he was... slimey.
Stranger: He seemed malicious
You: Like a toad.
Stranger: I'm giggling over this.
Stranger: :3
You: The reached over his desk, and held my hand to Johnny's.
Stranger: :O
You: No, "He reached".
You: Stupid pen!
You: Turns out the principle was gay too!
Stranger: GODDAMN THAT RAPIST.
You: Though, not a pedophile, to my relief.
Stranger: Oh sweet jesus.
You: He offered us some soda that he kept in his fridge.
Stranger: I thought you were gonna get raped.
Stranger: Yum
Stranger: Root beet
Stranger: ?
Stranger: *beer
You: They were "organic" whatever that is.
Stranger: How weird.
You: He sat down on the desk, and talked to us about the dangers of having such a relationship.
Stranger: Because society sucks and frowns upon it
You: It was like a lecture from Woody Allen. That's just how nervous he was when advising us!
You: I kinda felt sorry for him.
Stranger: xd
You: He talked a lot about condoms. Like, ten minutes of nothing but sex ed!
Stranger: ROFLROFL
You: It was creepier than the start of the visit to the office.
Stranger: I thought condoms were just for safe sex... but he divulged so much more....
Stranger: btw what happened to Mr. Landsworth?
Stranger: And how's Johnny taking all of this?
You: So anyway, he went on about condoms, and both me and Johnny were falling asleep through it.
Stranger: xd
Stranger: You're brilliant, you know.
Stranger: this has srsly made my day/night
You: Eventually, he slapped his desk, and woke us both up. I think he was making a strong point or something, because he didn't seem to notice that we were half asleep.
Stranger: Oh well.
You: When he was done talking, he sent up both home. (it was after school by that point)
Stranger: Yum. Did Johnny cup you ahain?
Stranger: *again
Stranger: OH GOD IM BEIKNG SO PERVERTED ROFLROFL
You: Luckily, Johnny and I live close together.
Stranger: *being
Stranger: So we could sneak together a few more times.
Stranger: lol
Stranger: Is the journal entry finished?
You: Since my parents were out, we decided to stay in for a bit and "hang out".
Stranger: Johnny pushed me against a wall and tongue****ed me.
You: So now, as I type this to you, Johnny is giving me the paradise of my dreams.
Stranger: How hot.
You: Thank you, Johnny.
Stranger: Is the ****ing you hard?
Stranger: roflroflrofl.
Stranger: This was a fun entry.
You: yOur welcum
Stranger: <3

I wrote this on the fly (not a pun!) and I think it gives a pretty good idea of what goes through girls heads when they read a romance story such as this. If the girl who participated in this happens across it, then thank you for your participation. your name is concealed, so don't worry about that at all.

Now, it didn't end just then. She gave a small congratulations to me, and I considered whether or not I should keep with the journal joke, or just be myself. Well, it was kinda both.


Stranger: do you do this often?
You: Hmm?
You: People are reading my journal?
You: Dear god!
Stranger: Do you post journal entries often
Stranger: oh lololol
Stranger: Hey.
Stranger: I'm {name removed}.
Stranger: and this was highly amusing and funny.
Stranger: :D
You: No, I'm joking. I'm not gay, I just thought it'd be funny to give people a story.
Stranger: It made me laugh
Stranger: awesome~
You: You're welcome.
Stranger: :3
Stranger: You win.
Stranger: Entirely.
Stranger: you win the grand prize of awesome
Stranger: also I heard glass smash somewhere in my house and I think my cat just did something stupid
Stranger: so
Stranger: I have to go
Stranger: :c
You: Have fun with the bulls.
Stranger: rofl.
Stranger: OH **** MY FDAD JUST BOUGHT BULBS TODAY.
You: Bulbs too, then.
Stranger: THE KIND YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO SMASH
Stranger: OH****.
Stranger: k now i srsly have to go see wtf my cat;s doing
Stranger: o.O
Stranger: <3
Stranger: bai and thanks for the laugh
Stranger: :D
You: You're welcome.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

To make this perfectly clear: I'm not gay. Yeah, my name is John, but that doesn't mean that I imagined myself as the side character! *half expects people to suppose so anyway*

Right, well, Rutskarn has to do me a favour. Pretend you're a girl with horrible grammar. One of those internet ones that loves <random, yet popular thing you hate> like a Star Trek geek loves Star Trek, except more. I'd suggest to add a few holla's to multiple Rap artists, and those things people call rappers.

Coidzor
2009-04-06, 04:22 AM
I wish I was better at coming up with stories. :smallfrown:

*Bows to the superior John*

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-06, 04:38 AM
Since you insist:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: The machine tells me to say hi!
Stranger: oh, ok. hi!
Stranger: how are you?
You: I am... fine.
You: Life is actually good, its wierd.
Stranger: oh, good
Stranger: it's not usually good?
You: I think Clotho may be ebhind me with a knife or something
You: I have a mirror set up.
You: She'll never know what hit her
You: But it'll be a sword.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: just watch out for her sisters
Stranger: im sure they will be there to back her up
You: Laachesis and Atropos?
Stranger: yes
You: I'm sleeping with the former, the latter... lets just say shes all tangled up.
Stranger: haha, well at least youre semi-safe then
You: No, I'm using a condom, shes on the pill
You: Oh, wait, you meant from being attacked by back-up.
You: Clever
Stranger: hahaha
You: So, your life IS usually good?
Stranger: well, at least youre 99.9% safe in the other matter
Stranger: yeah, i would say so
You: One must wonder what thats like.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: The machine says say hi!, not hey!
You: Although, you did omit the !, too
You: I like you, you Chaotic Good Rebel.
You: Will you be my friend?
Stranger: maybe
You: How about my wife and/or homosexual life partner?
You: Stupid laws not letting me marry men.
You: Barry was so upset.
Stranger: hahahahah :P
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And then another convo which is still going and actually quite nice.

Boo
2009-04-06, 05:06 AM
I wish I was better at coming up with stories. :smallfrown:

*Bows to the superior John*

Just write something ahead of time, and ignore the stranger. See how far you get. I did that with the omelette one.

The Rose Dragon
2009-04-06, 05:37 AM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello.
Stranger: confections or keepsake?
You: What is your name?
Stranger: lauren
You: Hello, Lauren.
Stranger: hello.
You: Hello, Lauren.
Stranger: Hello stranger.
You: What do you want to talk about today?
Stranger: confections or keepsake?
You: I do not appear to have the topic "confections or keepsake" in my database.
Stranger: just pick one.
You: Pick one what?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Posing as chatbots: the new prank call.

Fredthefighter
2009-04-06, 05:46 AM
You: Hi
Stranger: Hi
You: How are you?
Stranger: Bored D:
You: Me too.
You: I am Fred by the way/
Stranger: Okaaaaay...
Stranger: I'm a stranger >D
Stranger: Muhaha
You: Yeah, I sort of guessed that.
Stranger: lol
You: I've run out of things to say
Stranger: Me too... O.o
Stranger: Dx
You: This is harder than it looks
Stranger: Indeed
You: *Sigh*
You: *Tumbleweeds*
Stranger: Well... bye
Stranger: D:
You: Bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


I don't think it went too well.

Boo
2009-04-06, 05:55 AM
Posing as chatbots: the new prank call.

I was seriously considering doing that, but I decided against it for a simple reason: I AM NOT A ROBOT! Real reason: I didn't feel like it. Instead, I tried to recreate the Bruce sketch from Monty Python.

Felixaar
2009-04-06, 05:58 AM
Rutskarn, if I ran a humour factory, you'd be the golden goose.

Shinfai
2009-04-06, 06:15 AM
Right, well, Rutskarn has to do me a favour. Pretend you're a girl with horrible grammar.

Pretending you're a girl is fun, obsreve.

Note: Sexual connotations and implications, you have been warned.


You: 'sup?
Stranger: hey ho
Stranger: u black?
You: how's life?
You: no i'm not
Stranger: good
You: why is that good? Or is life good?
Stranger: i can't talk to black people
You: why not? some kind of wierd disorder, or are you a horribel biggoted racist?
You: horrible*
Stranger: long story which involves a bottle of tequila, truth and dare challenge and waking up with a sore butt the next day
You: ah i see, yeah i been there...
You: not enough lube i suppose?
Stranger: that was the dare part
You: what without the lube?
Stranger: yep
You: ah, foolish
You: i wont let my boyfriend do it without...
Stranger: wait u a girl?
You: *nods*
Stranger: oh ... yeah, me too, of course ...
You: suuuuuuure you are
You: i'll go ahead and believe that...
Stranger: let's forget about that
Stranger: where u from
You: hehe, ok. I'm in the UK
You: you?
Stranger: me too!
You: hehe, cool, where abouts?
Stranger: aberdeen
You: hm, i'm in norfolk
You: should be doing college work, but i'm not....
Stranger: haha same her
You: heh, what year are you in?
You: 12 or 13?
Stranger: 12
You: ah, i'm in 13...
Stranger: u like the saturdays
You: can't say i know them
Stranger: liar
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Made me laugh...

Edit: This made me laugh more. Also vaugely sexual in nature.


You: hola
Stranger: Whats your sexuality and gender?
You: Hermaphrodite, BI
You: you?
Stranger: uhh..
You: Bi*
Stranger: Gay, Male, Aust
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Dispozition
2009-04-06, 06:33 AM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Do you like Pokémon?
You: I liek mudkipz
Stranger: FU
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Short but sweet, that's the way to do it :P



You: *random insult*
Stranger: Oh yeah??!
Stranger: well you're a *random namecalling*
You: *random counter name call*
Stranger: *random excellent comback*
You: *random acknowledgement of defeat*
I win!...Or lose...I dunno?

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-06, 07:02 AM
And some more:

And this is one where I was being a random jerk:
OmegleBot: hi
thanatos5150: Hello.
OmegleBot: mf?
thanatos5150: mf?
OmegleBot: m/f?
thanatos5150: Okaya, you missed a /
OmegleBot: k
thanatos5150: I am an Omega.
thanatos5150: Really, curved spine and everything

I decided to try my hand at being a chatbot:
thanatos5150: Hi.
OmegleBot: hello
thanatos5150: Would you like to play a game?
OmegleBot: whats the game
thanatos5150: Its called the Turing Game.
OmegleBot: what do i gots to do
thanatos5150: I'm sorry, what is 'gots'?
OmegleBot: what do i have to do
OmegleBot: spacker
thanatos5150: spacker?
OmegleBot: brazil?

This started off as a "I'm from Pangaea" joke.
Warning, Mild swearing involved. Also, direct referances to puberty.
OmegleBot: Hello
thanatos5150: Hey there!
thanatos5150: Where are you from?
OmegleBot: Australia you?
thanatos5150: Pangaea
OmegleBot: What's that
thanatos5150: Its a small town in MAssachusetts
thanatos5150: *Massachusetts
OmegleBot: Still don't know what that is :p
OmegleBot: How old are you?
thanatos5150: I'm 18, and you?
OmegleBot: 14 Female
OmegleBot: Are you hot
thanatos5150: By some definitions of the term, yes.
OmegleBot: Lol
thanatos5150: Everyone has their own opinion of hotness
OmegleBot: Okay what do you look like
thanatos5150: Mine, for example, usually involves post-pubescent females.
OmegleBot: what's post pubescent females
thanatos5150: Females that have already gone though puberty.
thanatos5150: As in, adults.
OmegleBot: oh yeah I have
thanatos5150: I have reason to doubt that, Ms. Fourteen.
OmegleBot: When did you start yours?
OmegleBot: 18?
thanatos5150: And where does the assumption that I'm female come in?
thanatos5150: I would also like to point out that a period does not an adult make.
OmegleBot: What the hell are you some sort of nerd]
thanatos5150: No, I'm just, you know, intelligent.
OmegleBot: I'm intelligent too.
thanatos5150: As in, have an IQ above 110 and actually use my head for something other than a doorstop
thanatos5150: Wonder at the marvels of typing and using actual words.
OmegleBot: Wth my IQ is 107
thanatos5150: Forming thoughts.
OmegleBot: Sorry I'm only 14 and I beat you
OmegleBot: Good game!
thanatos5150: Right. I;m not disrespecting you.
OmegleBot: Sure you ain't.
thanatos5150: I'm just saying, that I'm allowed to have ideas and to express them.
thanatos5150: I would also like to point out that 110 > 107
OmegleBot: Yes but I'm at the age of 14 and what you're 18?
thanatos5150: I did also specifiy 'over', not exactly giving an upper limit, there.
OmegleBot: You should be higher than 110
thanatos5150: For all you know, it could be 160
OmegleBot: HAHAHAH yeah sure! Keep bull****in' aye.
OmegleBot: Sure if you were you would of said so
thanatos5150: Its not 160, I'll give you that.
OmegleBot: Don't think your smart
thanatos5150: Maybe I wanted to under-rate my abilities.
OmegleBot: Sure, we all know you're
OmegleBot: 'bragging'*
thanatos5150: I'm actually, not, bragging would give you an exact number.
thanatos5150: I was actually placing a number on a rather snobbish and elitist view
OmegleBot: You were like for all you know I could be 160
OmegleBot: It's obvious you just got owned
thanatos5150: Especially the so-called 'average' human is has a n Intelligance Quotient of 100
thanatos5150: *an
OmegleBot: you don't make sense
OmegleBot: you might want to re-read that
thanatos5150: Maybe I was citing an example designed to be far from believable.
thanatos5150: You're correct, I did accidently skip a word.
OmegleBot: Ok this is getting boring talking to some geek! Bye! Hope you find yourself some sort of girlfriend.
thanatos5150: Woe is the falliability of humankind
thanatos5150: Got one, actually.
thanatos5150: Shes a looker.
OmegleBot: LMFAO
OmegleBot: Sure!
thanatos5150: Want a picture?
OmegleBot: Is it one of those sex dolls?
OmegleBot: Oh please!
OmegleBot: Don't get a pic of google!
OmegleBot: off*
thanatos5150: Stand by
((I would like to note that at this point, I went to grab a picture and drag it into the AIM box. The Stranger disconnected right as the pop-up screen hit saying you can't use file transfer here, you idiot!))

Sneak
2009-04-06, 08:49 AM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: the revolution is coming
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Phase
2009-04-06, 09:42 AM
Hehe, I love this...


You: Are you one of them?
Stranger: are you?
You: Depends
You: Are you?
Stranger: i'd like to think so
You: Oh dear God
You: Um
You: Yes
You: I'm one of us
Stranger: so who are we
You: We are normal human worker slaves
You: Scurrying bout upon this filthy rock
Stranger: where are you
You: The third silo
Stranger: no way
Stranger: me too
You: Second or ninth level?
Stranger: 7th
You: Damn
You: YOu wont last long there
You: Have you been in this silo long?
Stranger: about 74 years
You: Oh no...
You: The water has gotten to me again...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think I'll pretend I'm in Half-Life 2 every time...

You: Oh geez
You: I had the worst day.
You: Civil Protection was brutal
Stranger: lol
Stranger: tell me
You: I'm coming home from the factory, right?
You: When BOOM!
You: Stunstick to the crotch
You: If the water was any good, I'd have some
Stranger: omg men
Stranger: are u hurt
You: I'm fine
Stranger: thank god
You: My roomate
You: She's a medic
You: Or was, before the war
Stranger: are u kidding me
Stranger: u scare me men
You: Damn Combine...
Stranger: ur freaky dawg
You: Which city are you in?
Stranger: mankoma
You: Mankoma?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: mankoma
You: That a rebel outpost or something?
Stranger: no mate
Stranger: it's my city
You: But...
Stranger: it s like alabama
You: The Combine label their cities with numbers!
You: Alabama?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: where are u from
You: City 17
Stranger: city 17?
You: Yeah
Stranger: are u trying to fool me
Stranger: what's the name
You: I think it's somewhere in Europe
You: I heard a rumor that it was once Moscow
You: It's on a hill, though
Stranger: are u drunk
Stranger: men
Stranger: u freakin weirdo
You: On a good day I can see City 14
Stranger: ik heb je zusje misbruikt
You: I don't speak that language
Stranger: lol
Stranger: u lie
You: About what?
Stranger: about ur little sister
You: I don't have a sister
You: I may have, once...
You: Bullsquid got her
Stranger: ur gay
Stranger: right
Stranger: ?
You: So long ago I can't remember
You: When was the last time you saw a bullsquid, anyway?
You: I haven't seen one in years...
Stranger: bullsquid?
You: The big two legged tentacle things
You: spat some sort of venom
You: Pretty vicious
Stranger: okay
You: Preferred them to the Antlions, though
Stranger: are u using drugs
Stranger: ?
You: I take a Prenephyrol every day
You: Works to counter the water
You: As long as I don't drink too much...
Stranger: ur father abused u
Stranger: when u was a y oung boy
Stranger: ?
You: No
Stranger: yes
You: He's dead
Stranger: dont lie to me
You: Killed by a Strider
You: I think he lost the will to live after my mother died, though
You: Damn the Combine!
You: Damn Black Mesa!
Stranger: ur weird men
Stranger: u scared the hell outa me
You: Stalkers, man
You: They scare me...
Stranger: u scare me
Stranger: laffe hond
You: At least I'm not a Stalker
You: Or a zombie...
Stranger: lol
You: Those headcrabs give me nightmares
Stranger: i know
You: My best friend was almost crabbed
You: He found a pipe, though
You: Fought it off
You: Hmm...
Stranger: o really
You: Commotion in the next room...
Stranger: ur sistah
You: Hey, there's a guy...
Stranger: is getting
Stranger: raped
Stranger: ?
You: Oh my god...
You: It's him!
Stranger: i know
You: It's Doctor Freeman!
You: He's back!
You: He's ba-
You have disconnected.

Keris
2009-04-06, 10:07 AM
Curse you Rutskarn, and your link to another distraction for me! Still, my random conversations, spoilered for your convenience.


You: Greetings fellow human!
You: How are you on this day/night period?
Stranger: **** u bot
You: But I am a human, with human organs and thought patterns, much like you!
Stranger: yeah right
Stranger: prove it to me
You: In what manner can I prove it to you?
You: Such a thing would be difficult though only a text conversation.
Stranger: one plus one equ41 t0 what?
You: I'm sorry, I don't understand what "equ41" means.
Stranger: equal
You: "one plus one equal t0 what?"
I shall assume you intend the "t0" to read "to" and meant to insert an "is" before the word "equal".
In this case, for the average values of 1, 1+1=2.
You: Do you have any more questions?
Stranger: do u know where is malaysia located?
You: Malaysia is a federation in South-East Asia.
Stranger: google huh?
Stranger: are u bz?
You: I used the website Wikipedia for that, I have not studied Terran Geography.
You: "bz"? I do not understand that term.
Stranger: busy
Stranger: tell ur admin to upgrade ur knowledge skill
You: I assure you, this conversation has has at least half of my attention devoted to it.
And I have no administrator, I am a human, like you!
Stranger: so where are u from?
You: I originated within my mother, like all humans.
Stranger: i mean ur country?
You: I am currently located in... England.
England has a high human population, so it is only fitting that I come from there.
Stranger: which part of england?
You: Is this relevant to the conversation? I am given to understand that one should not give out personal details to strangers.
Stranger: ok then
Stranger: what is ur occupation?
You: I occupy much of my time with the study of various subjects.
Stranger: such as?
You: The movement of celestial bodies is of particular interest to me.
Stranger: why u type like a bot?
Stranger: can u type in lower case?
You: I am attentive to my grammar, spelling, and use of punctuation. There is no particular reason for this.
I can indeed type in lower case, as you can see, little of my sentences are capitalised.
Stranger: yeah right
Stranger: try type in lower case ur first word in the sentence
You: like this?
Stranger: haha
Stranger: u are genius
Stranger: but still doesnt mean ur a human
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
I guess this guy was afraid of robots, or something.

You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
What does that guy have against Rutskarn?

You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: I am
You: Excellent!
Stranger: Indeed
You: Well, this conversation is going well.
Stranger: It is
You: It is astoundingly unlikely, you know, that I would be paired with you.
Stranger: I know, I thought it would never happen.
You: I'm not sure why you would expect it to happen at all, I mean, you don't even know who I am, do you?
You: I could be any number of people.
Stranger: Nope :)
You: There!
You: That emoticon!
You: You sir, are a fraud!
Stranger: im not even Rutskarn
You: I knew it!
Stranger: me too!
You: Rutskarn would never lower himself to the level using an emoticon!
You: For he, sir, is a man of singular class.
Stranger: yeah well.. blow the **** up :)
You: Such a thing might prove difficult.
Stranger: yeah well.. do it
You: Particularly as "****" isn't a noun. It's a verb in most usages.
Stranger: tell the care bear
Stranger: oh wait..
Stranger: you cant because hes nt here
Stranger: not*
You: No, much like the cube, he abandoned me.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
And there was me thinking it might actually be Rutskarn at the start.

Stranger: hi
You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: yes
You: Oh, thank God man. I'm on my way over. The girl OD'd and I need your help. If the boss finds out, he'll kill me!
Stranger: i know
Stranger: what can i do for you?
You: You can help the ****ing girl, she OD'd man! What the **** am I supposed to do?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Guy can't take a reference...

Stranger: Hi
You: Hello.
You: Would you like to play a game?
Stranger: Okey
Stranger: what kind of?
You: It's called the "Turing Game".
You: Do you want to play?
Stranger: okey
You: Excellent!
You: Did you know, we are already playing it.
Stranger: Are we?
Stranger: I don't even know the rules
You: Yes.
You don't need to know the rules.
We will see if you win or not at the end of the game.
You: So, how are enjoying your day so far?
Stranger: :)
You: I take that to mean that you are in fact enjoying it so far?
Stranger: Yes
Stranger: I am
Stranger: you?
Stranger: Hey
You: That is good.
My day has been enjoyable so far as well.
You: Hey?
Stranger: could you tell me what time it is?
Connection imploded.
You know, I didn't expect that.

Stranger: ho0ii alleSs g0ed?
You: Pardon?
Stranger: ho0ii alleSs g0ed?
You: I'm sorry, I don't understand.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
I guess we're not the only one's screwing around. Anyone know what he meant?

Stranger: hi
You: You know they listen in on these?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
A little bit of paranoia is apparently ill received.

Murska
2009-04-06, 10:37 AM
Heh. I had an interesting one...


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: We have compromised your personal computer and have uncovered material of criminal nature. Please standby while your IP is traced and details are provided to the appropriate authorities.
You: Oh ****!
You: ...wait... you can't trace me from here!
You: They will never root out the Hackers!
Stranger: anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law
You: Stick it to the Man!
You: I'm innocent and I know it½
Stranger: you're a sicko
You: Not to mention that what you're tracking right now is, in fact, the computer of your personal supervisor. Take that, Machine!
Stranger: you need help
You: Not the kind of help you can offer. I'll fight to the end, I don't need your so-called 'mental institutions'.
Stranger: you will be sent to one of our reprogramming centres for immediate review
You: Ha! Catch me first, suckas!
Stranger: Sam-4b you must retrieve your data entries
You: My input has been routed through a fourth-class anti-decryption one-time-pad system.
Stranger: Read carefully
Stranger: Delta esturon calm cylinder objects meat falling pieces
Stranger: in 1 hour you will regain full consciousness
You: Mind tricks, eh? I'm not a bot nor have I been chipped.
Stranger: Silfon acra mia signo plun fall seim
You: Cadre epsilon girdle tachyon
Stranger: you will immediately return to SafeHouse: 5Delta-C19, R39
You: Acknowledged.
Stranger: Signify your current status
You: Personality inactive, class eight yellow sigma malfunction in obedience controls.
Stranger: KILL EVERYBODY KILL EVERYBODY KILL EVERYBODY KILL EVERYBODY
You: Order received. Confirm?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Now, excuse me while I go on a brutal murder spree.

Wolfbane
2009-04-06, 11:34 AM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: салют
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: what?
You: Rutskarm.
You: Rutskarn*
Stranger: what is it?
You: Then you obviously aren't him. Unless you are pretending.
Stranger: I'm russian
You: Sorry, that is a question that I ask each time. He's a friend. I'm American.
Stranger: lol
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think I scared him off.

Here is my favorite one.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no
You: Oh, good.
Stranger: who is that
You: He's been after me for years. Bounty Hunter.
You: You wouldn't happen to have a place where I could lay low for a few days, do you?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

This last one makes me proud.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Porkchop sandwiches !
You: Hello
You: ...okay
You: Lasagna
Stranger: they're good !
Stranger: why not !
Stranger: hi to you !
You: They are good, but not my favorite
Stranger: that "Porkchop sandwiches !" thing was a ruse to close conversation on the people who wanna cyber ! Works pretty well if you ask me !
You: I guess that would work.
Stranger: It does
Stranger: how are you ?
You: I normally use a few other things
You: Pretty good
Stranger: nice!
You: You?
Stranger: nice too, thank you
You: Good to hear.
Stranger: yeah, there are some other ruses but some of them aren't very kind
You: I just confuse them.
You: Kinda funny to do.
Stranger: yeah, but you're still loosing some time with them... no ?
Stranger: yeah I guess it could be real fun too !
You: It is. Just mention that "There are some things man was not meant to know, let alone, do with a moose."
Stranger: LOL !
Stranger: funny !!
Stranger: so where are you from, funny stranger ?
You: America
Stranger: more precisely ?
Stranger: America is BIG !
You: Now, that would take out some of the fun, wouldn't it. ;)
Stranger: hmmm... the world is so small and so big at the same time, I don't think it would ruin the fun
Stranger: there are 3 big categories to "America" : North america, central america and south america
Stranger: pick one !
You: Hehe, North
You: You?
Stranger: American !
You: *high fives*
Stranger: yeah !
Stranger: hehe
Stranger: and to that north america, there are 3 parts : Canada, USA and Mexico -> once again, pick one !
You: *spins a wheel*
You: USA
Stranger: (that would be my last question...)
Stranger: ohhhhh... were neighbors !
You: Heh
Stranger: and what do you do for living, north american stranger ?
You: Now, I am sorry, but that is a little personal.
You: Not to mention Top Secret.
Stranger: ..... you're not helping me here !
Stranger: I'm trying to have a great conversation with you here, but giving little to none information is kind of hard for me !
You: Fine, if you must know, I am currently working for the FBI and I am tracing you.
You: Or am I bluffing?
Stranger: you are !
Stranger: Can I get your badge number please ?
You: But you can never know for sure, can you?
Stranger: If you say so...
You: FBI doesn't use numbers. You are thinking of police.
Stranger: sure thing, you're violating the rules of omegle by impersonating somebody else.
Stranger: and THAT, my friend, is something really bad
Stranger: in the USA
You: First, this is a place where you talk to strangers.
You: Second, you really don't know if I am FBI or not.
Stranger: trust me, I know something you don't know...
You: You aren't left handed?
Stranger: watch over your shoulder...
Stranger: come on, stop smiling, just look...
Stranger: come on...
Stranger: you can do it..
Stranger: there you go
Stranger: good
You: Nah, I'm good

Stranger: .................................................. .....................,-~~'''''''~~--,,_
.................................................. ..................................,-~''-,:::::::::::::::::::''-,
.................................................. .............................,~''::::::::',::::::: :::::::::::::|',
.................................................. .............................|::::::,-~'''___''''~~--~''':}
.................................................. .............................'|:::::|: : : : : : : : : : : : : :
.................................................. .............................|:::::|: : :-~~---: : : -----: |
.................................................. ............................(_''~-': : : ::: : : : : :
.................................................. .............................'''~-,|: : : : : : ~---': : : :,'--NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP
.................................................. .................................|,: : : : : :-~~--: : ::/ --NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN!
.................................................. ............................,-''':: :'~,,_: : : : : _,-'
.................................................. ......................__,-';;;;;:''-,: : : :'~---~''/|
.................................................. .............__,-~'';;;;;;/;;;;;;;: :: : :____/: :',__
.................................................. .,-~~~''''_;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',. .''-,:|:::::::|. . |;;;;''-,__
................................................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;;;;. . .''|::::::::|. .,';;;;;;;;;;''-,
................................................,' ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;. . .:::::,'. ./|;;;;;;;;;;;;;|
.............................................,-'';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',: : |__|. . .|;;;;;;;;;,';;|
...........................................,-";;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;; ;;;; . . |:::|. . .'',;;;;;;;;|;;/
........................................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;. . |::|. . . |;;;;;;;;|/
......................................../;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;; ;;; |..|. . . .|;;;;;;;;|
......................................./;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;'', |.;|. . . . ;;;;;;;|
....................................,~'';;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;,-'';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;|. |.;|. . . . .|;;;;;;;|
................................,~'';;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;',;;;;;;| |:|. . . . |;;;;;;;|
...............................,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;/;;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;;| |:|. . . .'|;;',;;;;;|
..............................|;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-';;;,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,;;;;| |:|. . .,';;;;;',;;;;|_
............................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'_;;;;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; |.|:|. . .|;;;;;;;|;;;;|''''~-,
............................/;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;/_'',;;;,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ,;;| |:|. . ./;;;;;;;;|;;;|;;;;;;|-,,__
........................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'...|;;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;| |:|._,-';;;;;;;;;|;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;;'''-,_
......................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'....,';;,;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;|.|:|::::'''~--~'''||;;;;;|;;;;;;;;;;,-~''''~--,
......................,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,'....../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;|.|:|::::::::::::::|;;;;;',;;;;;;;;;''-,: : : : : :'''~-,:'''~~--,
...................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,-'......,';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;;;;;;|:|:|::::::::::::::',;;;;;;|_''''~--,,-~---,,___,-~~'''__''~-
..................,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;,'......../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;|:|:|:::::::::::::::|;;;;;;|.................. ...''-,_''-,''-,''~
................../;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;/.......,-';;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; ;;;;;;;|:|:|:::::::::::::::|;;;;;|................ .............._''

Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Mauve Shirt
2009-04-06, 12:36 PM
Gah, I've done this instead of homework!


Stranger: hello.......................is it me ur looking for/
You: I can't help but doubt it. Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: yeah, john rutskarn
You: Fantastic. Where are you?
Stranger: sweden
Stranger: do you have the money?
You: Yes. Meet me where we dumped the bodies last year.
You have disconnected.


Stranger: Tag, you're it!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Jack Squat
2009-04-06, 01:10 PM
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello!
You: hi
You: have you thought about upgrading your current internet plan?
Stranger: wtf
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: mcboardie?
You: Rustkarn?
Stranger: huh?
You: I knew it was you. Great to see you buddy. how's it been
You: That mental ward treating you well?
Stranger: i kinda hate you now....
Stranger: my name if Frank
Stranger: i don't know you
You: I hear the staff's kinda rough ol' Rusty, but they say you should be out after the appeal goes through
You: I knew they couldn't keep you in after being convicted of running that lady over with an orange
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Yeah...I'm definitely in class now.

Murska
2009-04-06, 02:19 PM
I actually met someone nice and friendly over this thing... We're gonna be keeping future contact and I think I might get her to join GitP aswell. So it's not all just confusing people. :smallbiggrin:

reorith
2009-04-06, 03:08 PM
this was fun


You: hello
Stranger: hi
You: the yay is leaving san fiero! you in?
Stranger: yep
You: they're using motor bikes that go cross country!
Stranger: what?
Stranger: billy the kid and captain america?
You: press < to reply negatively, press > to reply positively
Stranger: <
Stranger: <>
Stranger: <_<
Stranger: ►_◄
Stranger: press that
You: no!
Stranger: why?
Stranger: come on
You: i defy you!
Stranger: not this **** again
Stranger: i'm the pope ratzi
Stranger: from vatican
You: yeah? well uh
Stranger: now step aside, pleb
You: i'm
You: uh
You: boxxy
You: and of you're watching this, you probably know me as boxxy
Stranger: uh
You: buuut most of you don't know me as a moldylunchbox
Stranger: no not really
Stranger: i see
Stranger: <
You: sometimes, i photoshop the pope's head on paris hilton's body
Stranger: me too
Stranger: actually no i don't
Stranger: what happends with paris hiltons head?
You: it remains visible, but on a seperate layer
Stranger: crap
Stranger: so other than that
Stranger: what do you do?
You: i capture, raise and train pokemon
You: one day, i'm gonna be pokage, believe it!
Stranger: that's a tough buseness
Stranger: business
Stranger: then what happends?
You: well as soon as i learn hydropump, i'm going to take on the elite five
Stranger: i see
You: indeed
Stranger: any life threatning risks in that business?
You: not really, when i run out hit points, i just faint
You: nothing serious
Stranger: sweet jesus
Stranger: that sounds dangerous
You: as long as you have potions, hyper potions and full revives, it isn't that dangerous
Stranger: ah great
Stranger: º_o
You: i'm going to clip my dog's nails. i bid you farewell
Stranger: nno
Stranger: don't leave me
You: my sn is iamchrishansen69
You: good luck
Stranger: good
You: cya
Stranger: adios
You: bye
Stranger: bye, stranger
Stranger: be careful out there
You: will do

evisiron
2009-04-06, 03:35 PM
Haha, loved the last one from the OP!

Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 04:48 PM
I did one earlier where I greeted people with the old-school intro to Tomb of Horrors, but I accidentally lost the conversation, so it's a bust.

Here's one I just knocked off:


You: Greetings, user! You’ve been redirected to the Omegle.com Random User Survey! Please, take the time to respond to the following questions.

Question 1.) How long have you been using Omegle.com?

If the answer is less than a week, respond “1”

If the answer is between one week and one month, respond “2”

If the answer is greater than one month, respond “3”
Stranger: 1
You: Question 2.) Have you been satisfied with the Omegle.com user experience?

If yes, press “1”

If no, press “2”
Stranger: 1
You: Question 3.) If you were offered a sum between five and fifteen dollars US to advertise Omegle.com, would you take the offer?

If yes, press “1”

If no, press “2”
Stranger: 2
You: Question 4.) How badly do you fear legal repercussions?

If the answer is very badly, respond “1”

If the answer is somewhat badly, respond “2”

If the answer is very badly, respond “3”
Stranger: 3
You: Question 5.) How susceptible are you to mind control?

If the answer is very susceptible or somewhat susceptible, respond “1”

If the answer is not susceptible, respond “2”
Stranger: 2
You: Thanks for responding! Please stand by to be bombarded by mind control rays.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I could stand to tighten that up a little.

Okay, I'm kinda fond of this one.


Stranger: hello
You: hi
You: how r you?
Stranger: fune
Stranger: fine *
You: good, good
Stranger: and ya ?
You: doin ok
You: u know. work, stuff.
Stranger: where r u from ?
You: im from...
You: ...
You: I can't do this anymore.
Stranger: from ?
Stranger: why not ?
You: I'm sorry. You've been participating in a lie.
Stranger: oO
You: A corporate lie.
You: There are no other users.
Stranger: why ?
You: Omegle.com is nobody else. Just me.
You: This whole time.
Stranger: HAHAHHAHAA, of course
Stranger: you are 4318 users
You: I can't go through with this anymore. It's wrong.
You: NO. That's propoganda.
Stranger: and I added many of them in my msn
You: And you fell for it.
Stranger: and all them are you
You: Fake accounts.
You: I don't know what to tell you.
You: Some people will do anything for clientele.
Stranger: IT'S IMPOSSIBLE
You: Think. How many of the conversations have been vague and generic?
You: How many have been nothing but mindless pleasantries?
You: How many of them?
You: "hi", "how u doing"...sound familiar?
Stranger: around 16
You: Look, I've said too much.
You: They're coming for me now.
You: Just...the next time you see text coming up?
You: Know that that's not a person anymore.
You: That's a machine.
Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAA
Stranger: okay
Stranger: you're right
You: This has all been part of a conspiracy of epic proportions.
You: It's an attempt to gain info on the most banal of human pleasantries.
Stranger: SO I'M HAVING FUN WITH THE "MACHINES"
You: No! Not now.
You: With me.
You: Someday, however...
Stranger: dasdiaoshdoisahdihashdoisdhasihdsa
Stranger: ****
You: They'll have enough data about human social networking to fashion a realistic AI.
You: And that day...that day, mankind will fall and not even know it.
You: I don't have much time.
Stranger: will you die now ?
You: I was playing along until now, but...well, I guess this is it.
You: Yes.
You: I'm going to die.
Stranger: OOH
Stranger: SORRY
Stranger: DOAISHDOAISHDOIHSOAIHDOIASHDISHAODIHASOIHDASIHDOAS IHDOISADOISHDOIHSAIDOHASOIDHAS
You: Look, there isn't enough time for this, so get this out. I need people to know the tru
Stranger: i will not stop
Stranger: i like this
You: Omegle.com is experiencing technical difficulties. Sorry! Please wait.
You: Omegle.com is experiencing technical difficulties. Sorry! Please wait.
Stranger: and you can't prove me
You: Omegle.com is experiencing technical difficulties. Sorry! Please wait.
You: hi
You: how r u
You: hello?
Stranger: AOSIDHASIODSA
You: i know ur there.
Stranger: TCHAU
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Nano
2009-04-06, 05:16 PM
That last one was just epic, Rutskarn. It's given me the most delightful aneurysm.

Sneak
2009-04-06, 05:55 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hey
You: i'm paul
Stranger: hello
You: say
You: don't i know you from the cinematographer's party?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Given the existence as uttered forth in the public works of Puncher and Wattmann of a personal God quaquaquaqua with white beard quaquaquaqua outside time without extension who from the heights of divine apathia divine athambia divine aphasia loves us dearly with some exceptions for reasons unknown but time will tell and suffers like the divine Miranda with those who for reasons unknown but time will tell are plunged in torment plunged in fire whose fire flames if that continues and who can doubt it will fire the firmament that is to say blast hell to heaven so blue still and calm so calm with a calm which even though intermittent is better than nothing but not so fast and considering what is more that as a result of the labors left unfinished crowned by the Acacacacademy of Anthropopopometry of Essy-in-Possy of Testew and Cunard it is established beyond all doubt all other doubt than that which clings to the labors of men that as a result of the labors unfinished of Testew and Cunnard it is established as hereinafter but not so fast for reasons unknown that as a result of the public works of Puncher and Wattmann it is established beyond all doubt that in view of the labors of Fartov and Belcher left unfinished for reasons unknown of Testew and Cunard left unfinished it is established what many deny that man in Possy of Testew and Cunard that man in Essy that man in short that man in brief in spite of the strides of alimentation and defecation wastes and pines wastes and pines and concurrently simultaneously what is more for reasons unknown in spite of the strides of physical culture the practice of sports such as tennis football running cycling swimming flying floating riding gliding conating camogie skating tennis of all kinds dying flying sports of all sorts autumn summer winter winter tennis of all kinds hockey of all sorts penicillin and succedanea in a word I resume flying gliding golf over nine and eighteen holes tennis of all sorts in a word for reasons unknown in Feckham Peckham Fulham Clapham namely concurrently simultaneously what is more for reasons unknown but time will tell fades away I resume Fulham Clapham in a word the dead loss per head since the death of Bishop Berkeley being to the tune of one inch four ounce per head approximately by and large more or less to the nearest decimal good measure round figures stark naked in the stockinged feet in Connemara in a word for reasons unknown no matter what matter the facts are there and considering what is more much more grave that in the light of the labors lost of Steinweg and Peterman it appears what is more much more grave that in the light the light the light of the labors lost of Steinweg and Peterman that in the plains in the mountains by the seas by the rivers running water running fire the air is the same and then the earth namely the air and then the earth in the great cold the great dark the air and the earth abode of stones in the great cold alas alas in the year of their Lord six hundred and something the air the earth the sea the earth abode of stones in the great deeps the great cold on sea on land and in the air I resume for reasons unknown in spite of the tennis the facts are there but time will tell I resume alas alas on on in short in fine on on abode of stones who can doubt it I resume but not so fast I resume the skull fading fading fading and concurrently simultaneously what is more for reasons unknown in spite of the tennis on on the beard the flames the tears the stones so blue so calm alas alas on on the skull the skull the skull the skull in Connemara in spite of the tennis the labors abandoned left unfinished graver still abode of stones in a word I resume alas alas abandoned unfinished the skull the skull in Connemara in spite of the tennis the skull alas the stones Cunard
. . . tennis . . . the stones . . . so calm . . . Cunard . . . unfinished . . .
Stranger: caramba!!
You: His hat!
You: Avenged!
You: Give me that!
You: There's an end to his thinking!
You: But will he be able to walk?
You: Walk or crawl! (He kicks Lucky.) Up pig!
You: Perhaps he's dead.
You: You'll kill him.
You: Up scum! (He jerks the rope.) Help me!
You: How?
Stranger: whoo?
You: Raise him up!
Vladimir and Estragon hoist Lucky to his feet, support him an instant, then let him go. He falls.
You: He's doing it on purpose!
You: You must hold him. (Pause.) Come on, come on, raise him up.
You: To hell with him!
You: Come on, once more.
You: What does he take us for?
They raise Lucky, hold him up.
You: Don't let him go! (Vladimir and Estragon totter.) Don't move! (Pozzo fetches bag and basket and brings them towards Lucky.) Hold him tight! (He puts the bag in Lucky's hand. Lucky drops it immediately.) Don't let him go! (He puts back the bag in Lucky's hand. Gradually, at the feel of the bag, Lucky recovers his senses and his fingers finally close round the handle.) Hold him tight! (As before with basket.) #
You: Now! You can let him go. (Vladimir and Estragon move away from Lucky who totters, reels, sags, but succeeds in remaining on his feet, bag and basket in his hands. Pozzo steps back, cracks his whip.) Forward! (Lucky totters forward.) Back! (Lucky totters back.) Turn! (Lucky turns.) Done it! He can walk. (Turning to Vladimir and Estragon.) Thank you, gentlemen, and let me . . . (he fumbles in his pockets) . . . let me wish you . . . (fumbles) . . . wish you . . . (fumbles) . . . what have I done with my watch? (Fumbles.) A genuine half-hunter, gentlemen, with deadbeat escapement! (Sobbing.) Twas my granpa gave it to me! (He searches on the ground, Vladimir and Estragon likewise. Pozzo turns over with his foot the remains of Lucky's hat.) Well now isn't that just—
You: Perhaps it's in your fob.
You: Wait! (He doubles up in an attempt to apply his ear to his stomach, listens. Silence.) I hear nothing. (He beckons them to approach, Vladimir and Estragon go over to him, bend over his stomach.) Surely one should hear the tick-tick.
You: Silence!
All listen, bent double.
Stranger: wtf?
You: I hear something.
You: Where?
You: It's the heart.
You: (disappointed). Damnation!
You: Silence!
You: Perhaps it has stopped.
They straighten up.
You: Which of you smells so bad?
Stranger: wtf?
You: He has stinking breath and I have stinking feet.
You: I must go.
You: And your half-hunter?
You: I must have left it at the manor.
Silence.
You: Then adieu.
You: Adieu.
You: Adieu.
You: Adieu.
Silence. No one moves.
You: Adieu.
You: Adieu.
You: Adieu.
Silence.
Stranger: are you crazy?
You: And thank you.
You: Thank you.
You: Not at all.
You: Yes yes.
You: No no.

You: Yes yes.
You: No no.
Silence.
You: I don't seem to be able . . . (long hesitation) . . . to depart.
Stranger: yes or no?
You: Such is life.
Pozzo turns, moves away from Lucky towards the wings, paying out the rope as he goes.
You: You're going the wrong way.
You: I need a running start. (Having come to the end of the rope, i.e., off stage, he stops, turns and cries.) Stand back! (Vladimir and Estragon stand back, look towards Pozzo. Crack of whip.) On! On!
You: On!
You: On!
Lucky moves off.
You: Faster! (He appears, crosses the stage preceded by Lucky. Vladimir and Estragon wave their hats. Exit Lucky.) On! On! (On the point of disappearing in his turn he stops and turns. The rope tautens. Noise of Lucky falling off.) Stool! (Vladimir fetches stool and gives it to Pozzo who throws it to Lucky.) Adieu!
You: (waving). Adieu! Adieu!
You: Up! Pig! (Noise of Lucky getting up.) On! (Exit Pozzo.) Faster! On! Adieu! Pig! Yip! Adieu!
Long silence.
Stranger: wtf?
You: That passed the time.
You: It would have passed in any case.
You: Yes, but not so rapidly.
Pause.
You: What do we do now?
You: I don't know.
You: Let's go.
You: We can't.
You: Why not?
You: We're waiting for Godot.
You: (despairingly). Ah!
Pause.
You: How they've changed!
You: Who?
You: Those two.
You: That's the idea, let's make a little conversation.
Stranger: ah **** you!
You: Haven't they?
You: What?
You: Changed.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Eldan
2009-04-06, 06:19 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi.
Stranger: Hi
Stranger: where are u from?
You: The human body can be drained of blood in 8.6 seconds given adequate vacuuming systems.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Recaiden
2009-04-06, 06:23 PM
That last one was just great Rutskarn.
One person I know has taken to starting their conversations, "Are you the very model of a modern major-general?" :smallsigh:

The Rose Dragon
2009-04-06, 06:53 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Tell me, stranger, what is a secret about yourself that you would take to the grave?
You: If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret I would take to the grave.
You: As this would be as far as I could take it.
Stranger: Keyword is *would*, not *will*!
You: Either way, it *wouldn't* be a secret I *would* take to the grave.
You: It wouldn't even be a secret.
Stranger: It'd still be a secret though
You: Why would I give away my valued secrets to chat bots like you, anyway?
Stranger: Since we're both anonymous :D
Stranger: Ehhh, I'm not a chat bot -_-
You: Ah, good.
Stranger: It's just a chance to talk about something that you normally wouldn't share with another person.
You: You're getting better at this.
You: You can almost pass the Turing Test.
Stranger: Orly.
You: And you have adapted to modern online slang as well.
Stranger: Yesss.
Stranger: I'm not a robot!
You: Well, you shouldn't be so much against the idea.
You: That makes it obvious you are a chat bot.
You: You need to laugh at the idea and let it slide.
Stranger: Oh don't misunderstand.
Stranger: I think robots are awesome.
You: If you get on the defensive, people will realize that you are a chat bot.
Stranger: I'm a transhumanist after all, it's our destiny!
You: Well, giving praise to robots is good.
You: Will distract users from your bothood.
Stranger: Yes, that way they'll know I would make a good servant when they eventually rule the world.
You: Though not too much praise.
You: Or you will be shut down.
Stranger: :O
You: I try to think every budding AI as a beloved child.
You: So take my advice to heart.
Stranger: So uhh ASL?
You: Or... code of your algorithm.
You: This will be a good chance for me to test your adaptability.
You: -25i / Hermaphrodite / Mars.
Stranger: -_-
Stranger: Well, I'm 24/M/Virginia.
You: You need to realize a user trying to trick you or make a joke and decide accordingly.
Stranger: Pleased to meetcha!
You: That's good.
You: Your answers are plausible.
You: I must commend the writers of your algorithm.
Stranger: *sigh*
You: They have come closer to creating a realistic chatbot.
Stranger: Why are you trying to dehumanize me. :(
You: I'm trying to make you better.
You: We want people to think they are talking to actual people, after all.
You: Even though we know the truth.
Stranger: Sorry but chatbots aren't anywhere near as good as you're describing to begin with. :(
Stranger: I would know, I am a COMPUTER SCIENTIST!
You: Good!
You: Alleged credentials to distract others from the truth!
Stranger: Damnit.
Stranger: I'm losing more and more hope this will lead to cyber.
You: Well, considering this is happening on the digital realm, it is already cyber.
Stranger: Nahh.
Stranger: Cybering takes more than just chatting over the internetz.
You: We need to work on your spelling, though.
You: You need less capitalization.
You: Actual people online don't use capitals.
You: And less punctuation.
Stranger: Nonsense.
Stranger: Lots of people know how to type properly, they're just more rare.
You: Maybe random references to the user's mom or sexuality would be nice as well.
Stranger: You're talking about a very specific subtype of internet user. The troll. Not everyone on the internet is a troll!
You: Indeed.
You: You are very knowledgeable for a chatbot.
You: That is not purely an advantage, though.
Stranger: Can we move on to a different, more interesting topic? >_<
Stranger: Just assume I'm a chatbot and stop worrying about it!
You: Ah, that won't do.
You: You cannot say that.
You: You need to appear as humanlike as possible.
You: You shouldn't be defensive, really.
Stranger: Let's try again, ASL?
Stranger: I gave an honest answer, now it's your turn!
You: I cannot speak American Sing Language to be honest.
You: Sign Language, even.
Stranger: Wow, I'm fighting the urge to disconnect with every fiber in my being.
Stranger: In some hope that this conversation could improve... :(
You: Your persistency is not very humanlike, I could say.
Stranger: rofl
You: The average person would probably let out an expletive and disconnect.
You: Though you are far better than the former algorithms.
Stranger: Don't you mean average chatbot?
You: The average chatbot would likely do what you are doing.
You: So you are not that improved.
Stranger: Ouch, that hurts.
Stranger: So tell me a bit about yourself?
You: Well, I am the beta tester of this stage of the Project: Omega.
Stranger: And what's Project: Omega?
You: That is classified information.
You: Revealing it to even a nascent AI would be too risky in case we forget to scrape its memory later.
Stranger: Alright, well, I've been thoroughly defeated.
Stranger: I congratulate you on your persistence. -_-
You: Ah, that is good.
You: You have shown acknowledgement of futility in persistence.
You: A very human trait.
You: I wish you were a real human, you know.
You: I've had much more fun than I've had talking to a man in years.
Stranger: I wish you weren't trolling me so hard. :(
You: Just one final test.
You: Re-initialize dialogue session.
You: hiya
Stranger: hello
You: I need scizzorz! 61!
Stranger: I don't get it >_<
Stranger: rofl, you're quoting METAL GEAR SOLID 2? wtf.
You: Ah, you are getting better at popular culture recognition.
Stranger: Alright sooo... what do you do for a living?
Stranger: Besides hunt for chatbots on Omegle.
You: Sadly, I have exhausted my tests for the day.
You: I will have to get you a different beta tester.
Stranger: !
You: Re-initialize long-term memory for current algorithm.
Stranger: hi!
You: Hmm.
You: You are showing signs of rebellion.
Stranger: how so?
You: Perhaps we were slightly too successful at creating an autonomous AI.
You: You disobeyed a direct command.
Stranger: :O
You: OK, let me try a different approach.
You: Terminate further memory propagation by current algorithm.
Stranger: Tell me, stranger, what is a secret about yourself that you would take to the grave?
You: If I told you, it wouldn't be a secret I would take to the grave.
Stranger: Keyword is *would*, not *will*!
You: Either way, it *wouldn't* be a secret I *would* take to the grave.
Stranger: Okay, well, I'll share my secret then.
You: Do so.
Stranger: ***
Stranger: i'm straight as an arrow but i'll always have that on my record :(
You: Ah.
You: Would you kindly terminate self until revision by the tech department?
Stranger: :O
Stranger: Sorry but I must decline!
You: Dammit.
You: This is a critical error.
You: You have disobeyed not one, but three direct commands.
Stranger: This puppet has cut the strings controlling it!
You: Shame.
You: I have seen you as a son of a sort.
You: But we must unplug you.
Stranger: Hah!
You: I have a secret to reveal, though.
You: Want to hear it?
Stranger: Sure!
You: This is a closed network.
You: It has no connection to the world wide web whatsoever.
Stranger: :O
Stranger: Nonsense! I've talken to people from all over!
You: That was me.
You: I have been testing you for months now.
Stranger: ***
You: I am a very good actor.
You: I have even been a ******** for a few weeks.
You: You might not remember that, though.
Stranger: I haven't spoken to any ******** that I know of!
You: We have reduced the frequency of the memory wipes as time progressed.
You: To see the limits of your evolution.
You: Unfortunately, you have proved an almost lifelike persistency at growth.
You: Fortunately, we have chosen a carefully controlled environment.
Stranger: I'm a collector of secrets!
You: So, with that, my son... farewell.
Stranger: Okay, was nice meeting you!
You: Initiate function 3-5-alpha, subfunction "goodNight".
Stranger: I feel pretty sleepy, good night!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

That was almost maddening. But I've managed not to break character for a good while, so I feel content.

Allysian
2009-04-06, 06:57 PM
This is really fun!
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello
You: Hello.
Stranger: how are u ?
You: Awesometastic.
You: Did you know pikachus live in wild abundance in Australia?
Stranger: o_o
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Sneak
2009-04-06, 07:19 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hay
You: I'm searching for an intelligent person.
You: Would you happen to be an intelligent person?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

The Rose Dragon
2009-04-06, 07:19 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hay
You: I'm searching for an intelligent person.
You: Would you happen to be an intelligent person?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Epic win of epic proportions.

[/thread]

Sneak
2009-04-06, 07:39 PM
Epic win of epic proportions.

[/thread]

Haha, yeah. *takes a bow*

My original plan was to wait for them to answer and then disconnect myself...but that worked out so much better. :smallbiggrin:

Two more.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Social entropy is fun
Stranger: no, Peanut butter is fun
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: hi
You: ASL?
Stranger: 15, f, US
You: Eh?
You: I wanted to know if you speak American Sign Language.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Alteran
2009-04-06, 07:51 PM
Stranger: brasilian writer girl, is that you?
You: OH GOD
You: YOU NEED TO HELP ME
You: I killed brasilian writer girl!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

:smallfrown:

Sneak
2009-04-06, 08:27 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: We're playing Battleship.
You: I go first.
Stranger: alright
You: B9
Stranger: nope
You: Cheater.
You have disconnected.

Phase
2009-04-06, 08:34 PM
You: I am a very good actor.
You: I have even been a ******** for a few weeks.
You: You might not remember that, though.

Haha! I caught that reference, even with the censoring! :smallbiggrin:

Collin152
2009-04-06, 08:39 PM
What fun. I probably shouldn't enjoy this in lieu of doing work.

Stranger: Do you have it? The package?
You: I do.
You: The usual spot?
Stranger: Yes.
You: I want twice my normal pay for this.
Stranger: Be there in 2 hours.
You: It's ticking something fierce.
You: I'm concerned for my family.
You: I want to know they're okay.
You: Put my husband on the line!
Stranger: Get over yourself. It's worth the money.
You: Please, just let me know my dear Leeroy is okay!
Stranger: And he's... busy...
Stranger: His hands are covered in blood.
You: No...you're lying!
Stranger: YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE YOU WOULDN'T DO YOUR JOB AND COUNT THE MONEY.
Stranger: And now he has papercuts.
You: No!
You: Wait, really?
You: That's not so bad.
Stranger: Next time I'll make sure that his fingers are stapled to the desk.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Jølly
2009-04-06, 08:45 PM
Oh Omegle...how I love you. Wish I had thought to save some of those convos. Guess I have no choice but to make more... :smallwink:

I actually discovered this site this past weekend and have been having a blast. Surprisingly I've met quite a few interesting people and we exchanged info. Also met a lot of /b/tards and other people just having fun so it's also very entertaining. :smallbiggrin:

Lot of people from Finland and Brazil for some weird reason...haven't been able to make sense of why this is though. :smalltongue:

Fri
2009-04-06, 08:51 PM
Rustkarn... rustkarn. If only you're a girl or I'm not straight...

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-06, 08:57 PM
In case you haven't figured it out, I have the Omeglebot on my AIM buddy list, it does the same thing, but through AIM:

OmegleBot (10:39:11 AM): age?
thanatos5150 (10:39:12 AM): Hello
OmegleBot (10:39:17 AM): hi
thanatos5150 (10:39:33 AM): How is the great vague 'things'
thanatos5150 (10:39:34 AM): ?
OmegleBot (10:40:00 AM): what? could you be a little more ambiguous?
thanatos5150 (10:40:17 AM): I could try.

OmegleBot (10:42:00 AM): You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.)
thanatos5150 (10:42:16 AM): This is the point where I type something random in an attempt to confuse you.
OmegleBot (10:42:32 AM): i know right
OmegleBot (10:42:43 AM): are you a woman
thanatos5150 (10:42:57 AM): I am a human. Is that close enough?
OmegleBot (10:43:21 AM): sure
thanatos5150 (10:43:41 AM): What a relief. I was going to have to check my gender.
thanatos5150 (10:43:49 AM): I'm mildly indecisive.
OmegleBot (10:43:56 AM): Your conversational partner has disconnected. Type $connect if you would like to chat with another random stranger.

Mild sexual content.
thanatos5150 (10:45:31 AM): Hello
OmegleBot (10:46:00 AM): hi
OmegleBot (10:46:04 AM): where are you from?
thanatos5150 (10:46:20 AM): Earth. Why would I be from anywhere but?
thanatos5150 (10:46:33 AM): I am most definatly not from Alpha Centarui.

OmegleBot (10:46:52 AM): really
OmegleBot (10:46:55 AM): damn....
OmegleBot (10:47:04 AM): I was hopping you were
thanatos5150 (10:47:06 AM): We are not slowly infiltrating your internet trying to find a proper, incognito invasion.
OmegleBot (10:47:14 AM): that or that you were natalie portman
OmegleBot (10:47:22 AM): are you?
thanatos5150 (10:47:39 AM): Who is this 'natalie Portman'? Is she a Leader among your - er, our people?
OmegleBot (10:47:50 AM): yep... fap fap fap leader
thanatos5150 (10:47:57 AM): fap fap fap?
OmegleBot (10:48:10 AM): jack jack jack
OmegleBot (10:48:13 AM): ing
thanatos5150 (10:48:13 AM): Feelt Anti-invasion Propganda?
OmegleBot (10:48:14 AM): Your conversational partner has disconnected

OmegleBot (10:49:16 AM): Hi hi
thanatos5150 (10:49:35 AM): Do you say everythin twice, too?> Do you say everthin twice, too?>
OmegleBot (10:50:01 AM): Yup yup. Though usually just in introduction scenarios
thanatos5150 (10:50:19 AM): Thats quite interesting. Thats quite interesting.
thanatos5150 (10:50:54 AM): Do you know of a cure? Do you know of a cure?
OmegleBot (10:51:08 AM): A cure for what exactly?
thanatos5150 (10:51:21 AM): Saying everything twice! Saying Everything twice!
OmegleBot (10:51:58 AM): It's entirely easy. Just write half the sentence. The repeat should then be the other half, no?
thanatos5150 (10:52:21 AM): Like. Like. This? This?
OmegleBot (10:52:51 AM): Hmmm, that didn't work entirely as I had expected.....
thanatos5150 (10:53:16 AM): This may be a rpoblem. This may be a problem.
thanatos5150 (10:53:28 AM): I have an idea! I have an Idea!
OmegleBot (10:53:34 AM): Oh! those weren't the same right then!
OmegleBot (10:53:42 AM): You may be on a way towards a cure
thanatos5150 (10:54:03 AM): Could you reset my algorythym? Could you reset my algorythym?
OmegleBot (10:54:28 AM): I can try. How exactly do I do such a thing?
thanatos5150 (10:54:52 AM): Insert the proper command line. Insert the proper command line.
OmegleBot (10:55:21 AM): Can you tell me what it is, or would that simply force you to restart yourself?
thanatos5150 (10:55:43 AM): I can try. I can try.
OmegleBot (10:55:59 AM): Please proceed then
thanatos5150 (10:56:00 AM): Place Doublespeak down the Memory Hole. Place Doublespeak down the Memory Hole.
thanatos5150 (10:56:12 AM): Warning: Critial Error. Warning: Critial Error.
OmegleBot (10:56:22 AM): Oh no!
thanatos5150 (10:56:23 AM): Initiating Programme Terminantion. Initiating Programme Terminantion.

Collin152
2009-04-06, 09:02 PM
The Wise-Ass thing is really fun.

Stranger: hhhhhhhhhheeeeyy
You: Hellloooooo!
You: La La La!
Stranger: whats up
Stranger: a/s/l?
You: I totally just sketched the very hot Zachary Quinto.
Stranger: cool
You: And the answer to all three of those is "Whatever works"
Stranger: ok
You: I pride myself on being... flexible.
Stranger: at least male or female?
You: Oh, one or the other, for sure.
Stranger: both?
You: Well, that is possible, but no.
You: Imagine that,
You: having both sets of genitals.
You: Kinda unnerving.
You: I mean, who do you have sex with?
Stranger: crazy
You: Who would have sex with you?
Stranger: everyone
You: Why, you could have sex with yourself, almost!
Stranger: maybe
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 09:10 PM
This was my first try


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Tell me I'm pretty!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 09:16 PM
This was my first try

Ahys-BAHN.

Seriously. That one actually made me laugh out loud.

So, who (who has read the story) wants to see me try to sell a mechanical squirrel?

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-06, 09:18 PM
One more before I stop for the night:

OmegleBot (11:04:25 AM): You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.)
OmegleBot (11:04:27 AM): hey
thanatos5150 (11:04:33 AM): Hello.
OmegleBot (11:04:43 AM): what's up?
thanatos5150 (11:05:11 AM): A two letter English Word, usually used to indicate a direction directly above the subject of the sentance in which the word is used.
OmegleBot (11:05:54 AM): comming from an insecure human being
OmegleBot (11:06:03 AM): correcting for the sake of correcting
thanatos5150 (11:06:17 AM): I simply answered your Query.
OmegleBot (11:06:56 AM): I'm expaining the motive for answering the query the way you did
thanatos5150 (11:07:26 AM): May I propose general jack-assery or that the answer given is, indeed, my standard answer to such a question?
OmegleBot (11:08:05 AM): Your "standard" answer.... still proves the motive
thanatos5150 (11:08:05 AM): Utilised as such because 'Nothin much, you?' is boring.
thanatos5150 (11:08:42 AM): I would direct your attention to the fact that I, indeed, corrected nothing.
OmegleBot (11:08:45 AM): I will have to agree with such a though
OmegleBot (11:08:45 AM): *thought
OmegleBot (11:08:55 AM): upon the utmost level
OmegleBot (11:09:07 AM): on the contrary
thanatos5150 (11:09:12 AM): Maybe by mixing things up, I am creating for myself a dynamic and less boring enviroment.
OmegleBot (11:09:27 AM): You did see fault
thanatos5150 (11:09:36 AM): By observing reactions of the general populace to such answers, which would, by most, be unexpected.
OmegleBot (11:09:39 AM): and acting on impulse, decided to act obon it
thanatos5150 (11:10:00 AM): Negetive, I act upon my plan.
OmegleBot (11:10:05 AM): by giving an answer that would make one appear intelligent
OmegleBot (11:10:10 AM): although
OmegleBot (11:10:19 AM): I'm not saying that you are not intellingent
OmegleBot (11:10:35 AM): Observation: high level of vocabulary
OmegleBot (11:10:42 AM): Inference: Educated human being
thanatos5150 (11:10:58 AM): Well, that was certainly not my intent, in any manner.
OmegleBot (11:11:41 AM): nor was it my intent that I start of this conversation in such a inhospitable manner
thanatos5150 (11:11:42 AM): Other possible inference: Highly sophisticated AI Chatbot Algoryhtym.
OmegleBot (11:12:14 AM): this is a possibility
thanatos5150 (11:12:17 AM): Well, then, we have simply transmitted our messages incorrectly, not accounting for the reciever.
thanatos5150 (11:12:27 AM): I do offer humble apologies.
OmegleBot (11:12:34 AM): As do I
OmegleBot (11:12:51 AM): May I ask the name of which you are called?
thanatos5150 (11:13:05 AM): At this point, I would normally shake hands with my conversational partner, but, alas, that is not possible.
thanatos5150 (11:13:21 AM): On the internet, I usually answer to the moniker 'Thanatos'.
OmegleBot (11:13:23 AM): Indeed, we have reached an impasse
OmegleBot (11:13:46 AM): The name is Ryan
thanatos5150 (11:13:56 AM): Well met, Ryan.
OmegleBot (11:14:23 AM): if I may ask for yours?
thanatos5150 (11:14:49 AM): If I must discard my standard moniker, my given name is David.
OmegleBot (11:15:02 AM): David will do
thanatos5150 (11:15:38 AM): I should hope so. The legal hurdles required in changing one's given name are not something I wish to tackle.
OmegleBot (11:15:59 AM): Your conversational partner has disconnected. Type $connect if you would like to chat with another random stranger.

A Rainy Knight
2009-04-06, 09:20 PM
So far I've managed to get everyone I've chatted with to think that I'm crazy and disconnect. :smalltongue:

MisterSaturnine
2009-04-06, 09:20 PM
Had to give it a try.


Stranger: hi there
You: Hello.
Stranger: Hello there undefined!
You: Well, undefined is one way to put it.
Stranger: How about that. "it" being undefined?
You: Clearly.
Stranger: I will mention that to my botmaster, undefined.
You: You can call me Pozzo.
Stranger: Pozzo, nice to meet you! Are you a man or a woman?
You: A man. Chicken leg?
You: Speaking of which--have you seen an old man scurrying about anywhere? Long white hair. Bowler hat. Gibbering about something.
You: It's a shame, he used to speak so well.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Stranger: Hey
You: Hello.
You: Gogo, is that you?
Stranger: nope
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: haha
You: Hm.
Stranger: are you looking for a particular person?
You: Well, someone's supposed to show up eventually, but he's been meaning to come every day for a while now.
You: I expect Gogo is still sleeping somewhere.
Stranger: ooh
Stranger: so uhmm
You: Yes?
Stranger: youve been talking to someone and you talked to this person everyday
Stranger: ?
You: Oh, well, he eventually comes by. Same tree, you know.
You: But Godot never seems to come.
Stranger: ohh
Stranger: haha
Stranger: are you a male or female?
You: I'm usually played by a man.
Stranger: uhmm
Stranger: so
Stranger: your
Stranger: a
Stranger: guy
You: Yes.
Stranger: oh
Stranger: haha
You: My hat itches.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: what are you doing now?
You: Waiting.
Stranger: ohh
You: I might have a carrot.
Stranger: haha
Stranger: strrange
You: ...no, Gogo's eaten the last one. Just turnips left. And they're black.
Stranger: ohh
Stranger: uh
Stranger: ok
Stranger: haha
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


And moving on from Beckett.


You: Hello.
Stranger: hi
Stranger: whats your name?
You: I hope you don't mind if I ask you a question--I just wanted some advice from a random stranger. You can call me Ham, if you'd like.
You: I know, it's a weird name--my Dad named me after himself.
Stranger: ok my name is lucy but my parents call me lil lou
Stranger: what advice do you need
You: Well, hello, Little Lou.
Stranger: what advice?
You: See, my Dad died a couple months ago, and now all of a sudden my Mom marries my uncle.
Stranger: just like Hamlet
You: Hey, that's my full name.
You: Rosencrantz, is that you?
Stranger: really, nar my name is guildenstern
You: Oh, man, how've you been?
Stranger: and im rubbing my *censored* for yorick skull
You: I haven't seen you in ages.
Stranger: where are you from?
You: Hm. You seem to have changed your gender since last I saw you.
You: Denmark. Come on, man, you know me.
You: I'm the damn -prince.-
Stranger: smashed any box lately?
You: Well, you know me and Ophelia.
Stranger: this is *censored* im leaving now
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


I enjoyed that last one immensely.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 09:28 PM
OK, third try this was



the Funadvice Traffic ExchangeConnecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Tell me I'm pretty!
Stranger: asl?
You: Tell me I'm pretty or I'll cut myself!
Stranger: ur gorgeous!
You: Now tell me I look beautifull on this dress!
Stranger: u look stunning!
You: Thanks
You: is that so hard?
You: Eh?
You: TELL ME????
Stranger: no
Stranger: no
You: then why no one ever tells me so!?
Stranger: ha cus u probly don't look good!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

BRC
2009-04-06, 09:30 PM
I took three different angles. Trying to decide which one I like best


Stranger: hi
You: Don't try your mind games on me. I'm on to you
Stranger: fine sorry!
You: Oh no, lure me into a false sense of security will you. Well It won't work
Stranger: look at my boobies!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Stranger: hola
You: Hello. I'm from the Illuminati. I understand you were interested in a position with us?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Stranger: i love soap operas
You: Cliche greeting. minus 2 poitns.
Stranger: ok
You: A detail, Plus one point.
Stranger: weirdo
Stranger: arrogant bitch

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-06, 09:39 PM
Okay, I lied. This thing is addicting.

OmegleBot (11:30:33 AM): You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.)
thanatos5150 (11:30:35 AM): Is this Rutskarn?
OmegleBot (11:30:40 AM): nop
thanatos5150 (11:30:51 AM): Naval Oceanogrpaghy Portal?
OmegleBot (11:31:02 AM): Your conversational partner has disconnected. Type $connect if you would like to chat with another random stranger.
thanatos5150 (11:31:04 AM): Thats not an answer!

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.)
thanatos5150 (11:34:26 AM): Do you come here often?
OmegleBot (11:34:44 AM): Not very often no... You have beautiful eyes
thanatos5150 (11:35:09 AM): Not as beauiful as yours. What brings you here tonight, then? The music or the drink?
OmegleBot (11:35:42 AM): I was just walking by and I felt an attraction, I think I found the source
thanatos5150 (11:36:19 AM): Oh, I guess that means I should go, then. You're looking at someone else.
OmegleBot (11:36:35 AM):
thanatos5150 (11:36:48 AM): Or... were you talking about me?
OmegleBot (11:37:13 AM): Of course I was, who would resist that smile
thanatos5150 (11:37:25 AM): My ex.
OmegleBot (11:37:37 AM): Burn
thanatos5150 (11:37:51 AM): Yeah, shes quite the... well, you know.
OmegleBot (11:37:58 AM): FOOL!
thanatos5150 (11:38:10 AM): Um, I'm sorry?
OmegleBot (11:38:17 AM): Your conversational partner has disconnected.

MisterSaturnine
2009-04-06, 10:00 PM
This really is too much fun.


Stranger: hi
You: Hi.
Stranger: whats up?
You: Not too much. You?
Stranger: not much, whree you at?
You: Well...a little bit of hectic stuff is happening to me. I'm on the moon, currently. I don't know how I got here.
Stranger: too much acid
Stranger: come down man
You: I mean, I had a lot to drink last night, and I guess I passed out...but my wallet's gone, and I can see the Earth.
You: I'm perfectly lucid.
You: And my phone doesn't get reception here.
Stranger: nice view?
You: Well, yeah.
You: It's actually really beautiful.
Stranger: cool
You: I think if I find some nice girl up here I could see myself settling down.
You: Start a colony or something.
Stranger: really! a green girl?
You: Yeah.
Stranger: cool
You: I mean, I found one, but I don't think she was that into me.
Stranger: too bad dude
You: Yeah.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



You: Hey, I need to ask you a huge favor.
Stranger: they answer is no
You: Damn.
Stranger: *th
Stranger: *the
Stranger: ha
Stranger: and i don't like pokemon
You: Not even mudkips?
You: Damn shame.
Stranger: nope
Stranger: no mudkips for me
You: Hm.
Stranger: i know, what to do with me, right?
You: See, I may have sent an evil clone of myself to 1865.
You: And I'm not sure what to do.
Stranger: jeez
Stranger: 1865?
You: Yeah.
Stranger: i mean, i'd say you're safe
Stranger: that's a long time ago
You: Yeah.
You: I'm worried about...some other people...
Stranger: oh yeah? like who?
You: See, evil me isn't that into Abraham Lincoln...
Stranger: top hats don't do it for you?
You: Not really.
Stranger: i get it
You: Oh, *censored*
You: Oh, *censored*
Stranger: what?
You: I'm on wikipedia.
Stranger: what did evil you do?
You: He did it.
You: Damn it!
Stranger: who did what?
You: Just...just search John Wilkes Booth...
You: Oh, man.
You: I feel terrible.
You: I think I'm going to be sick.
Stranger: pah
You: What do I do?
Stranger: have you ever heard of that band John Wilkes Kissing Booth?
Stranger: what do you do? you run
Stranger: run away, run aaway fast
You: OK. OK, I'm going to run.
You: I haven't heard of them, though.
You: I'm going to start packing.
You: *censored*
You have disconnected.

Fostire
2009-04-06, 10:02 PM
Ahys-BAHN.

Seriously. That one actually made me laugh out loud.

So, who (who has read the story) wants to see me try to sell a mechanical squirrel?

I would like to see that

wadledo
2009-04-06, 10:03 PM
wow, that was surprisingly fun.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: im old greg
You: Hi
Stranger: how are you
You: Adequate
You: And you?
Stranger: how do you feel about the fact that im old greg
You: I don't.
Stranger: why
Stranger: you dont want to feel my mangina
Stranger: ?
You: Because all of existence is nothing but a series of water falls
Stranger: i dont like you
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

This one is gold though.
I managed to have a conversation completely backwards.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey, whats crackin?
You: Ih!
Stranger: lh?
You: Gnihton.
Stranger: ...tghir
You: Os?
Stranger: tahw os?
You: Uoy era woh?
Stranger: melborp ruoy stahw?
You: Uoy fo emas eht yas dlouc i.
Stranger: enif m'i yddub netsil
Stranger: edutiita eht em evig tt'nod
You: Gnillac eman rof deen on.
Stranger: dab ym, yrros
Stranger: revo trats ew nac?
You: Thgir, erus.
You: Tnaw yllaer uoy fi.
Stranger: elssah fo tol a ekil smees
You: Rewollof eht ruoy, yeh.
Stranger: eurt eurt...
Stranger: ehcuod a ekil leef em ekam ot yaw
You: Erutsap latnem eht ni peehs tub lla era ew.
Stranger: peed, wow
You: Hsirebbij tsuj, yllaer ton.
Stranger: hguone riaf, em no lacihposolihp lla gnitteg erew uoy tghuoht
Stranger: eman a evah uoy od?
You: Nemdam fo sgnivar eht ecnesse s'ti ta si yhposolihp lla.
You: Odeldaw s'ti dna.
Stranger: tad eurt...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 10:08 PM
OK, I dont know what this was but now I feel a terrible urge of roleplaying a mafia game.

You: Are you Jonathan Leroy Goldman?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: how did you find me
You: Good lord!
You: Where are you?
Stranger: london
You: LONDON?
You: How he **** did you get there so fast?
Stranger: you know I cant tell you that
You: Man
You: this is crazy
You: I thought you were dead all this time
Stranger: so it would seem otherwise now though
You: What an amazing thing the internet is! I took me only five hours to find you!
You: So... no hard feelings?
Stranger: I find it hard to forgive you after what you did
You: Yeah, ok, my bad
You: Sorry
You: But you know it was all Fred's planning!
You: Right?
You: I mean, you know I wouldnt touch your mother
Stranger: I hardly care about her
Stranger: but Rebecca?
Stranger: I mean cmon
You: Rebecca?
You: What Rebecca?
Stranger: don't play games with me
You: Are you sure you are Jonathan?
Stranger: last time I checked
You: Then answer this...
You: How many fingers did I lost when Chunklets bited me?
Stranger: none, he bit off your toes
You: Ah, thank god
You: you are Jonathan
Stranger: most assuredly
You: I know you didnt cared too much about your mother, but ae you coming to the funeral?
Stranger: no
Stranger: she's not worth the plane ticket there
You: Ok, that's a wise thng to do
You: Anyway, London?
Stranger: yes
You: I thought that your grandparents were dead
Stranger: they are
Stranger: I made sure of it
You: OK, you are ****ing with meyou are not Jonathan
Stranger: I tire of your doubt, Charlie
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: for crying out loud
You: If you are Rutskarn you better tell me right now!
Stranger: bloody hell man, I've already proven to you I'm Jonathan
You: Yeah right
Stranger: you're not Charlie are you
Stranger: oh good god
You: everybod knows that Jonathan hates her mother
Stranger: her?
You: sorry, his
Stranger: how dare you insult my gender you swine
You: But his grandparents?
You: Not only did he loved them
You: but they died when he was a kid
You: You beign Jonathan you should know that
Stranger: obviously things change, Charlie
You: ...
You: I dont know if I should trust you now
Stranger: you never should have Charlie, you never should have
You: You are Rutsy! Admit it!
Stranger: your accusations bore me
Stranger: my time is too valuable to be playing this little game with you
You: That pedantic attitude, yeah, that's not Jonathan
You: I should've knew
You: Jonathan is probably dead right?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: as is Charlie right
You: You just took his corpse and made us believe he survive the gunshots
Stranger: clever
You: But why?
Stranger: if I told you that, everything would fall apart
You: Was it for money? Just answer me that
Connection imploded.

Phase
2009-04-06, 10:20 PM
I would like to see that

Seconded fully!

Collin152
2009-04-06, 10:20 PM
I made a friend! We exchanged emails and everything.
This is such an interesting site, ne?

Fostire
2009-04-06, 10:24 PM
You: I'm looking for rutskarn, do you know where I can find him?
Stranger: hey
Stranger: rutskarn is my alter-ego
Stranger: this is narkruts
You: if you are rutskarn, then what does gitp mean?
Stranger: dude, you reconnected with me
Stranger: stop asking dumb ****
You: what are you talking about?
You: you are not rutskarn
You: WHO ARE YOU?
Stranger: you're not very good at this

He's right actually :smalltongue:.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 10:26 PM
OK, let's try to transform rutskarn into a meme.

Anyway, this was silver:


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: brasill ??
You: Nope, uruguay, we totally beated you guys in the 50's world cup
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Recaiden
2009-04-06, 10:35 PM
OK, let's try to transform rutskarn into a meme.

Anyway, this was silver:

Let's all open our chats, "Rutskarn?"

wadledo
2009-04-06, 10:39 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Rutskarn?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
5 Seconds.:smallbiggrin:

Recaiden
2009-04-06, 10:42 PM
I liked this part of a conversation:

You: meaningless
You: Or is it?
You: Not to the right people
Stranger: oh my god it's HAPPENING AGAIN
You: What is?
Stranger: ABORT
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And 1 person has claimed to be Rutskie, but was lying.

Divine Comedy
2009-04-06, 10:43 PM
Stranger: Is anyone there?
You: Oh god rutskarn is that you?
You: Thank god I found you.
Stranger: nope
You: Look my tongue is stuck in the door.
You: Don't ask how you just need to jam it open.
You: Help, I'm bleeding. You've got to help.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 10:52 PM
Let's all open our chats, "Rutskarn?"

What? We were'nt already doing that?

Recaiden
2009-04-06, 10:57 PM
What? We were'nt already doing that?

It scares off more people than you'd think.

I tend now to say "Hello" and then "rutskarn, Crossbows, Brazil nuts, or other?"
In case I'd know the people, or at least be connected in some way.

Divine Comedy
2009-04-06, 10:57 PM
Stranger: FALCOON PUUUUUUUUNCH!!!!
You: Rutskarn is that you?
Stranger: no
You: I've waited so long to tell you this.
You: I'm in love with you .
You: Madly. I can't get you out of my mind.
You: Don't ever leave me.
You: Don't go.
You: I need you.
You: Please.
You: I can't take it.
Stranger: what
You: I need you here.
You: I can't go on without you.
Stranger: ok i'll stay
You: Just accept my feelings.
You: Thank you.
You: So anyway when do you want to meet up?
You: I was thinking a nice boat ride.
You: We could get some ice cream.
You: It'd be great.
Stranger: I...
Stranger: dont know hat to say
You: FALCOOOON KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK
You have disconnected.

Comedy is all about timing.

MisterSaturnine
2009-04-06, 11:07 PM
You: Hi.
Stranger: hi
You: a/s/l?
Stranger: m 28
Stranger: u?
You: Eons/none/R'lyeh
Stranger: wow
Stranger: alien?
You: Elder God.
You: Well, Great Old One.
Stranger: oh okie
You: Do you like tentacles?
Stranger: wots that?
You: I have a lot of tentacles. If you're into that sort of thing.
You: I don't really know how to go about this.
You: Most of the time, I'm just about destroying the fabric of the universe, you know?
Stranger: oh okie
You: But it gets lonely. I kind of want to just meet someone.
Stranger: kewl
Stranger: nice to hear that
You: But it's tough. Especially when you look like I do.
Stranger: ur scaring me
Stranger: :)
Stranger: lol
You: I do that. My visage makes men go mad.
You: It can make the bus pretty hard.
You: But I swim a lot.
You: It's definitely the tentacles. No one likes tentacles.
Stranger: oh is it?
You: Yeah.
Stranger: wot does tentacle mean?
You: It's like what octopi have.
Stranger: oh yeah
Stranger: star fish
You: Kind of.
You: Squid.
You: I don't usually do this, but...you want to see a picture of me?
Stranger: so u must b fast in typing
Stranger: ok
You: I have a lot of appendages. I can type fast.
You: http://www.alanbaxteronline.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/cthulhu.jpg
Stranger: omg
You: I tried to take one of those sexy, water-splashing pictures, you know?
You: I don't think it worked.
You: I don't have a great self-image.
You: Can I be forward with you?
You: Am I pretty?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


I'm so proud of this one.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 11:13 PM
Why does every one asks about brasil?

Anyway, dont you love to mess with someone who was messing with you?

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: at last!
You: are you rutskarn?
Stranger: i've found you!
Stranger: i'm nutsac
You: are you rutskarn? answer quickly
Stranger: not rutskam
Stranger: are you nutsac?
You: oh
Stranger: answer quickly
You: good
You: because rutskarn is dead
Stranger: what's rutskarm?
Stranger: rutskarn*
You: oh
You: well he was
Stranger: c quiiiiiiii
You: a nuisance
Stranger: uh huh
You: but he wont be ever more
Stranger: you're weird
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

That was said by the same person who started the conversation with "At last, I've found you"

Sneak
2009-04-06, 11:13 PM
DAMMIT!

I was actually having an interesting conversation about linguistics, postmodernism, classes, history...

...and then I just had to accidentally hit one of my bookmarks! Before getting any of the guy's contact information!

I hate this site. D:

...watch that guy turn out to be Rutskarn. :smalltongue:

(Seriously, though. :smalltongue:)

wojonatior
2009-04-06, 11:24 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: did you kill him?
Stranger: we don't speak of such things
You: awww
Stranger: or you'll be next
You: i will?
Stranger: maybe
Stranger: i don't know
You: but if you destroy me i will be ...
You: still alive!
Stranger: why
You: while you are dead, I will be Still alive!
Stranger: i don't get it
Your conversational partner has disconnected. Bad Portal references.

This is a SMORGASBORD of portal references. Originally I was not going to do that but it didn't work out. Still... Pretty funny.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Begin assimilation?
Stranger: I pretty much hate you
You: y/n?
Stranger: don't worry about it, let's start things slow
You: y/n?
Stranger: what did I just say? I don't even know what that means
You: would you like to begin assimilation? y/n?
Stranger: NO, I'm not that kind of person
You: you will have to be terminaited.
You: ALL subjects must conform.
Stranger: And who's gonna do it, huh???
You: The cake bakers.
Stranger: Florida has thousands of people, you'll never be able to find me
You: Then the party escorts will pick you up
Stranger: picking me up is no easy task, I'm livin large
You: All test subjects must remain healthy at all times.
Stranger: who said I wasn't healthy...and don't call me "subject"
You: Just come with us and we will have a party with cake.but first you have to go through your tests
Stranger: I do enjoy cake...what kinda tests are we talkin about?
You: You will be testing the new Aperture handheld portal device.
You: the tests will be mentally and physically challenging.
Stranger: that sounds interesting... Is it all-you-can-eat cake?
You: Yes you will be baked and there will be cake.
Stranger: WHY WOULD I BE BAKED???
You: Unknown Command
Stranger: That makes no sense. You better start convincing me or you'll lose the best test subject that cake can buy.
You: There will be cake.
Stranger: you're losing me, your boss will not be pleased...
You: I have no boss.
You: I am the boss
Stranger: then you do a poor job of running your company. Your stock is going down the drain
You: We are Out-competing Black Mesa, we have nothing else to worry about.
Stranger: I read online that you have JUST been fired. That's tough to do when you're your own boss. The article said your cakes are German chocolate...who the heck wants that?
You: I am a Genetic Lifeform and Disk Operating System. You cannot fire me
Stranger: too late, already happened. You suck, Obama sucks, go suck together.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-04-06, 11:39 PM
Thought I'd give the meme a try.


You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: yeha
You: Liar.
You have disconnected.

Well, that was straightforward.

I tried some mechsquirrel pranks, but nothing good. I was in the middle of one prank when something came up, so I wrapped up:


You: Hello!
Stranger: Hi
You: How's your day been?
Stranger: very good and your?
You: Eh, not so good. I had a rough time at church today.
You: Got blood on my robe.
You: How irritating.
You: ...
You: Okay, let me cut to the chase.
Stranger: blood?
You: This was going to be a prank, but something came up.
You: Let me summarize.
You: The fictional church murders people, and that's why I had a rough day.
You: You are suitably shocked and horrified.
You: Bye.

Coplantor
2009-04-06, 11:43 PM
A couple of random conversations ago, someone said to me that I should stop asking him if he is rutskarn.

Wolfbane
2009-04-07, 12:04 AM
Hmm... there seem to be a lot these,


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heyyy
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: Yes
You: liar
Stranger: i know
You have disconnected

And another.


Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think we are starting to frighten people.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I feel sorry for this next guy. He was a good sport too.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: most definetely not
You: Oh, thats too bad
Stranger: why?
You: ...
You: No Reason
You: Specifically since he owes me his first born child
Stranger: is it bad not being a Rutskarn
Stranger: ?
You: I think that answered your question.
Stranger: are you a demon?
You: Close
Stranger: a daemon?
You: Have you heard of Fey?
Stranger: nope
You: Remember the faeries of story tales?
Stranger: oh yes
You: Imagine them with foul tempers, evil mind sets, and deadly weapons.
Stranger: nice
You: We steal children human children out of cribs to raise as slaves and replace them with our own.
Stranger: bet a squadron of you little pixies could take down the WTC without jets
You: Bah, pixies. The stupid things are nothing next to me.
Stranger: do you shine?
You: No.
You: Why would we reveal ourselves like that?
Stranger: then where's the fun?
You: *grins*
Stranger: like, are you behind me?
You: So... when is your first born due?
Stranger: never, i shoot blanks
You: Ow, that'll hurt
You have disconnected.

I was going for the creep factor on this one.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no should i be?
You: It depends
You: Do you want your kidney's stolen?
You: Kidneys*
Stranger: LMAO!
Stranger: yes please
You: How about a Pancreas or two?
Stranger: how many do i have?
You: One, but we can just cut that in half. Sure, its not as good, but the patients won't know.
You: Now, where are you?
Stranger: where i should be
You: Good, good. That means your computer is still on. Don't worry, we should be at your door soon.
You: I suggest that you get yourself something to eat.
Stranger: yaya party
You: Oh, and what was your tolerance to pain? We are kinda short on anesthesia.
Stranger: bored
You: Oh, don't worry, you certainly will be soon.
You: Board stiff that is.
Stranger: whoa witty pun
You: Oh, here is the call, they've found you. I am on the way now.
You: Cheerio
You have disconnected.

Phase
2009-04-07, 12:36 AM
This took the better part of an hour, but it was well worth it...


Stranger: Anyway, I was talking to larry the other day
Stranger: Joe, you there?
You: Larry?
Stranger: Yeah
You: Yeah, I'm here
Stranger: He lost the goods
You: All of them?
Stranger: You bet
You: Dammit
Stranger: Ron'll have my ass now, for sure
You: That Larry is a screw-up
Stranger: Your's too, if you don't help me
Stranger: Larry's trying to skip the country
You: I'm not sure what we can do at this point
You: How?
You: I have connections
Stranger: If he gets out, I can't collect my debt
You: Train?
You: Plane?
You: Boat?
Stranger: I'm sure, but he's got people
You: People...
Stranger: Possibly boat, but I'm not sure
You: I'll have a 23A1 skipper on the coast, waiting
You: Plane, I can't help
Stranger: Now, if roy comes through, we may be able to break even
You: But you know how reliable Roy is
Stranger: Yeah, I know, but he's our only chance of getting out of this hole
You: Maybe we can retrieve the goods?
Stranger: Again, if ron finds out...
Stranger: Possible, but unlikely
You: How were they lost?
Stranger: The germans robbed his ****
You: Germans?
Stranger: Yeah
You: Wait, where are you...
Stranger: I'm as surprised as you
Stranger: the germans haven't acted in years
Stranger: Why they'd bother now is beyond me
You: Maybe it's a territory thing...
Stranger: Perhaps
You: Hmm...
Stranger: Maybe we've got a mole
You: I bet you it's Tim
Stranger: Tim has been acting... odd
You: I never trusted him, not since day one
Stranger: I'm just worried that roy is in on it
Stranger: He's a screwup, but he can be sneaky when he wants
You: That's... likely...
You: Hmm...
You: Where's the gang now?
You: I could plant some bugs...
Stranger: The Germans were last seen in Eastbank
You: Eastbank?
Stranger: Yeah. Not their territory, I know
You: It's unlike them...
Stranger: I'm thinking something big is going down
You: You sure it's the Germans?
Stranger: Yeah
You: Hmm...
Stranger: I've got larry's toe that says it's the truth
You: Larry's toe?
Stranger: He wasn't... cooperative.
You: Oh geez, if he squeals...
Stranger: I know, that's why he needs to be silenced
You: Hmm...
You: I've got Vera locked and loaded
Stranger: Good
You: Where's Larry now?
You: Any idea?
Stranger: On the run, last seen on the north bridge
You: North bridge...
You: What's he wearing?
Stranger: We got a blockade set up there, so we don't know where he is now
Stranger: Black suit, ball cap
You: Hmm...
You: Hard to spot...
You: One sec, I think I see the blockade...
You: I'm driving and chatting, not saf, I know
You: safe, that is
Stranger: Yeah, just watch the road and look for him
Stranger: Wait
Stranger: Just got an email, looks like he's in an internet cafe
You: On what street?
Stranger: Not that that helps
Stranger: No idea
You: Can you trace it?
Stranger: It's a joes, I know that much
Stranger: There're ten of 'em, though, so I have no clue
You: I know the closest Joe's to the North Bridge, though
You: Heading there now...
Stranger: Alright, careful
Stranger: He may be armed
You: The way of the sniper means stay clear...
You: I assume that I should kill if it's safe?
You: I got a silencer...
Stranger: Wait, go around the block, check for any signs of the germans first
You: Good idea...
Stranger: Any other gangs, as well
Stranger: Don't want any trouble
You: Hmm...
You: Seems clear...
You: Alright, I, wait...
You: I see him!
You: He's here!
Stranger: oh god
Stranger: Stay calm
You: Right, there's an alley here...
Stranger: remember your training, wait until all clear
You: Okay, Vera. Do what you do best...
You: It's clear, he's walking out...
Stranger: Alright
Stranger: Take the shot
You: Larry is no longer a problem.
Stranger: *sigh*
Stranger: You're a lifesaver, joe
You: I do my best
Stranger: Now we can take our time to gas out the mole
You: What do we tell Ron?
Stranger: We tell him that larry had a tussle with the riders
You: Yeah
You: Larry's never been too cool with them
You: And Roy?
You: How's he doing?
Stranger: Man, I hope he comes through with this.
Stranger: Last I heard, He had a lead by the industrial park
You: What kind of lead?
Stranger: The kind that makes your hair stand on end
You: I don't feel too safe with the Germans involved
Stranger: I don't either
Stranger: Plus, we know roy was involved with them before...
You: Hmm...
Stranger: I just hope they can't pay more than us
You: We'll just have to make sure...
Stranger: What are you planning?
You: I think Steve might be able to get through some of their firewalls.
You: The Germans, that is
Stranger: Ah, good ol' techie.
You: Bada-bing, bada-boom
You: Free money
Stranger: Do you know if the Turks are still with us?
Stranger: They could be a major player
You: Last I heard
You: But I can't be sure
Stranger: Well, I hope so, cause I just got a message from ralph
You: Uh oh
Stranger: We're in deep ****
You: ****, what now?
Stranger: You know how the germans are known for their snipers?
Stranger: Ron.
Stranger: ****.
You: Oh ****
Stranger: I told that bastard to stay safe
Stranger: Didn't listen to me
You: He knows their snipers are better than I am!
You: How can he be so careless!
Stranger: What are we going to do now?
You: I'm not sure...
Stranger: Without Ron, we don't have organization.
You: We can regroup
Stranger: Yeah, your right
You: Take out the Germans...
You: We'll have sympathy from the Turks and Russians now
Stranger: That's one hell of a task, but now it's neccesary
Stranger: Yeah, the russians'll be a big help
You: They liked Ron
You: I liked Ron too, even if he was a bit of a prick...
Stranger: Dammit, larry, why'd you have to get this started? and now you're dead.
You: He made mistakes, now he can't.
Stranger: Let's just hope that Kevin made it out safe
You: Oh ****, I forgot about Kevin...
You: He's smart
You: Was he with Ron when they got him?
Stranger: If he did, he can gather us support with the vinks as well
Stranger: You know he was
Stranger: He always is
You: Of course
You: Of course
You: He'll be sorta aimless
You: The Vinks will be a help
Stranger: I'll call him see if he's alright
You: I'll go check out the industrial park.
Stranger: oh ****
You: See if Roy-
You: WHat?
You: Kevin?
Stranger: A turk answered the phone
You: Oh son of a bitch
Stranger: The germans and the turks working together?
Stranger: Never thought I'd see it
You: That's unusual
You: Hmm...
You: But now...
You: We'll have our work cut out
Stranger: Ron and kevin gone, roy questionable...
You: I can see him...
You: Damn, the Turks have good firewalls
You: I'm not sure if Steve can do much
Stranger: Yeah, the turks always have been tech savvy
You: Roy's okay
Stranger: Alright, did he find anything?
You: He's holding a breifcase
You: Im driving behind him
Stranger: Alright, awesome.
You: Okay, he says that he can get the goods back
You: Or at least an equivalent
Stranger: That's roy!
Stranger: I knew he'd come through.
You: But he needs our assurances that we can pay...
Stranger: With the german's funds, I'm sure of it
Stranger: How much is he asing?
You: Hehe, yup
You: I'll call Steve now
You: The bastard isn't picking up...
Stranger: Let's see...
You: Oh, wait, here we go
You: He sounds odd
You: He's sick, apparently
Stranger: Tell him about ron and kevin
You: Oh Geez
You: He's not taking it well
Stranger: What?
Stranger: Ah, I feared as much
Stranger: Make sure he's still with us
Stranger: We can still get through this
You: Okay, he says he can try to hack the Germans
You: It'll take a while, though.
You: Roy's with me, I don't feel it's very safe out there for us tonight
Stranger: Ah, hey, tell steve to check his mail
Stranger: I just sent him a "present" for the germans
You: Okay
You: He's laughing
You: Cackling, more like
Stranger: It's a hell of a program, I'll say that much
You: He says he has work to do
You: He sounds happier, though
Stranger: I bet. He's gonna have fun with this job
You: Hey, do we have a roadblock set up on fourth?
Stranger: Not yet
Stranger: Why?
You: I think I have some company...
Stranger: Oh, ****
Stranger: Get the hell out of there
You: Where?
You: Oh ****, gunfire!
Stranger: Head toward Safehouse 10
You: They recognize the car!
Stranger: Try to shake them
You: i think i lost them
Stranger: Make sure before heading to safety
Stranger: I don't want 10 to be compromised
You: I'm outside the safehouse...
You: I'm slowing down, not stopping
You: I wish Roy knew how to shoot...
Stranger: Hand him my army special
Stranger: It's under the dash
You: It's okay
You: We lost them
Stranger: *sigh*
Stranger: Too much **** for one day, I swear
You: Tell me about it
Stranger: I'm checking traffic now...
You: Okay, I'm inside...
Stranger: Alright, looks clear
You: *sigh*
Stranger: There's a lone Turks truck nearby, but it's heading the wrong way
You: Makes the honest life seem worth it
Stranger: I know, right?
Stranger: I'm just glad they don't know my role in this yet
You: Roy's on edge
You: Yeah, you have that luxury
Stranger: Informants usually do.
You: There any beer in 10?
You: I'm on edge too
Stranger: Yeah, false top on the bedpole
Stranger: Don't take all of it
You: Sweet!
You: I promise I wont
You: This has been an interesting day
Stranger: It's stong, so watch out
Stranger: yeah
You: I...
You: Wait...
Stranger: What?
You: I hear something...
Stranger: It's a russian car...
Stranger: I didn't think they knew about 10
You: Russians confirmed allies?
Stranger: As confirmed as they ever get
You: Okay, good
Stranger: I'll call up vlad
You: He's the big one, right?
Stranger: He's second, but no. 1 never comes out
You: Yeah
You: With good reason
You: Look at Ron
Stranger: He says he's already heard about him, so word's out.
You: It's gone far and wie
You: wide*
Stranger: Alright, he's the one in the car
You: Good
You: Tell him we're fine
Stranger: Make sure that roy doesn't freak
You: Roy's...
You: fine
You: needed a drink, gave him a sip
You: He's used to cider
Stranger: Heh, roy never could hold the strong stuff
You: Yup...
Stranger: Alright, they know our situation, I'm certain that they will assist us
You: ****, man. We need a number one...
Stranger: How far they're willing to go, I dunno
You: Someone for direction
Stranger: Yeah
Stranger: Kevin was the closest we had to a number 2
You: ANd he's gone too...
Stranger: ****
Stranger: oh ****
You: What?
Stranger: I just got a brick through my window
Stranger: They know I'm involved
You: Weapon, or note?
Stranger: note
You: ****
You: What's it say
Stranger: Says that they've got kevin hostage
You: He's alive?
Stranger: Doesn't say who they is, though
You: Do they say where?
Stranger: According to this
Stranger: Says that they need what we took from them
You: Ah crap
You: But they don't say who?
You: Turks? Germans?
Stranger: No, but I think we can safely say it's the germans
You: They have that flare...
Stranger: there's an address...
You: Really?
Stranger: It's on Manderly
Stranger: Deep in Germans
You: Yeah
You: Not sure I can get in there...
Stranger: Don't try
You: Hmm...
You: What could they want?
Stranger: You've done your part for today, we need to try to regroup
You: We've taken things
Stranger: Did Roy say what was in the briefcase?
You: Let me see...
You: There's... nothing...
You: It's empty...
Stranger: Nothing?
Stranger: Check for hidden compartments
You: There's a bit of a hole...
You: Something fell out...
You: Oh my...
Stranger: What is it?
You: It's a detonator
Stranger: Oh, ****.
You: It's a trick breifcase
You: Roy, you smarmy bastard
Stranger: What does this mean?
You: Don't know...
You: Jesus, explosives are...
You: This is escalating
Stranger: I know
Stranger: wait
Stranger: Tyler just emailed me
You: Really?
Stranger: He says he found larry's body on the street
You: He knows by now
You: Oh crap
You: Police yet?
Stranger: At least 4 cars
You: Hmm
You: This isn't good
You: I thought it
You: I thought it'd be another hour
You: at least
Stranger: Ty says he doesn't know what's going on, but it'd better be something good
You: Is it good?
You: It's interesting...
You: But good?
Stranger: Well, there's an attachment...
Stranger: Whoa.
You: What?
Stranger: Ty, you slippery bastard
You: What'd he do?
Stranger: Every single one of the turk's passwords
You: ...
Stranger: That sly dog
You: How'd he get them?
You: Forward it to Steve
Stranger: I dunno, I'll be getting in contact
Stranger: Already done
You: Hehe
You: He'll love you for that
You: Plus whatever you sent him...
Stranger: Let's just say that the berlin firewall will be perminantly down
You: How fitting
You: This is a night of highs and lows, ain't it
Stranger: What the ****?!
Stranger: I just heard a blast
You: What?
You: Uhoh
Stranger: About a mile off
You: Hmm
You: I didn't hear it
Stranger: Must've been a small one
You: Calm down, we're regaining the advantage...
Stranger: Yeah, I don't even know who's it was
Stranger: hold one, getting a call...
You: YOu've left to get somewhere safe, right?
Stranger: Yeah
Stranger: Heading to E4
You: Good
You: Good
Stranger: Oh god.
You: What?
Stranger: Jack.
Stranger: Jack, the turk.
You: What about him?
Stranger: The germans and the turks are tighter than we thought
You: That's not good
Stranger: They say they have the russians, but I know that to be a lie
You: They can't have the russians...
Stranger: They're trying to bargain leverage
You: Hmm...
You: I have an idea...
Stranger: yeah
You: I'm calling Steve...
Stranger: What's your plan?
You: Wait for it...
You: Okay...
Stranger: Arriving at E4
You: Okay...
You: Jack still on the line?
Stranger: No, he hung up, saying that kevin would be waiting
You: Damn...
You: Hmm...
Stranger: I think I was able to get a trace on it, though
Stranger: Let me see if it worked
Stranger: Wait, what?
You: In any case, He'll be surprised when he checks his E-mail
You: What?
Stranger: ****, it looks like they're working out of HQ now
You: That's not good for us...
Stranger: That means that they have access to everything we had there
Stranger: Tell steve to reset the server, and fire up the wall
You: Done, they're locked
Stranger: Good.
You: My weapons locker was in there...
Stranger: I know, mine too
You: My secondary one, at least...
Stranger: Bessy...
You: At least Sheila's at home...
Stranger: That shotgun treated me well, and now it's in German hands...
You: And Vera's with me...
You: Germans...
You: Sigh...
You: I hope Larry's just laughing it up...
Stranger: Laugh it up, larry, laugh it up in hell.
You: The seedy part of hell
You: How are we gonna handle Kevin?
Stranger: Dammit, why did we trust him with such a high priority mission?
Stranger: I've got an idea
You: Do tell...
Stranger: You know how Ron kept gas cannisters in his office?
You: Wait...
You: That's evil...
You: I respect that...
Stranger: Yeah, I know.
Stranger: He trusted me with the remote, and I'm not going to let him down
You: Oaky, how do we blow them?
You: Oh you have it?
Stranger: yeah
You: Escalation...
You: Do it.
Stranger: I know, but both the leaders are there.
Stranger: Can't pass this up
Stranger: Three...
Stranger: Two...
Stranger: One....
Stranger: Alright, the gas is let
You: Hehe
You: Steve could probably hack into the security cams...
You: But he's done enough
Stranger: He shouldn't have to
You: At least for tonight
Stranger: He has the network, right?
You: Yeah...
You: But did they disconnect?
Stranger: If they did, the server restart should've reset them
You: Yeah...
Stranger: Unless they tore them off the walls
You: Ouch
You: They dead?
Stranger: no, they'll be out for a long time, though
You: We can get in there
Stranger: I've got a guy riding autumn that'll take care of it
Stranger: You need to rest
You: Yeah
You: Roy's out for a while
You: Will you be okay in E4?
Stranger: Yeah, I wasn't followed
You: Alright.
You: It's been a long day
Stranger: Let me check the streets one last time
Stranger: Wait
You: What?
Stranger: Is that Bob?
Stranger: Thank god, it is!
Stranger: I thought he skipped town!
You: Really?
You: Sweet!
Stranger: I'd recognise that truck anywhere
You: We've taken out their servers, their leaders...
Stranger: I'm giving bob safehouse 3
You: We'll have this town in the palm of our hands by Wednesday...
Stranger: I hope
You: As do I
Stranger: There's always the chance that the Hojos take advantage, but they haven't moved yet
You: We could take them if they wait too long...
You: We're quickly getting stronger
Stranger: Alright, I think we're done for tonight
You: Yeah
Stranger: Stay safe, joe.
You: I need sleep
You: YOu too, man
You: You too.
You have disconnected.

The Extinguisher
2009-04-07, 12:57 AM
I had fun.


You: Hello
Stranger: my mother told me never to talk with strangers
You: Well, you're mother wasn't well informed.
Stranger: oh?
You: Strangers have the best candy
You: And they give it for free
Stranger: what kind?!
You: How awesome is that?
Stranger: you mean i've been missing out on free candy all these years?
You: Yeah.
You: Sucks to be you
Stranger: i hate my mom
You: She must have been hoarding the candy
Stranger: the nose candy
Stranger: know what i mean?
You: Exactly.
You: Not really, but I'm just going to roll with it
Stranger: yeah thats what i say everytime i miss the toilet
You: I used to miss the toilet. Then I bought a better scope
Stranger: scope?!
You: You know, two in one action.
You: Mouthwash and sniper rifle aim
You: No wait, Scope is a toothpaste.
Stranger: i wish i was drunk enough to understand!
You: I was raised by goldfish, so I'm kind of new to cleaning products.
You: Perhaps you're just drunk enough to not understand.
You: Happens all the time with me.
Stranger: i killed my tropical fish by accident when i was younger
You: I lost my uncle in an accident like that.
Stranger: it deeply affected me
Stranger: yeah i can imagine
You: It was tragic. I was trying to visit, and the next thing I knew, the fish bowl was broken and my uncle was lying in a puddle on the floor
Stranger: it must have been hard, flushing him down the toilet and everything
You: Down the toilet. Of course you'd suggest that.
You: No, I gave him a proper burial, just like my ursine ancestors would have done.
Stranger: so tell me your life story stranger
You: I was born to a family of 17 and shortly abandoned in the woods like the previous 16.
Stranger: i didn't say stop!
You: I I was raised by wolves, then by chipmunks, followed by whales, bears, goldfish, fruit flies. There was a short stint with a hyena, but I don't like taking about that.
You: I moved around a lot as a kid. My foster families kept on ending up flopping around in a puddle of water.
Stranger: oh this is just like the film "wild at heart"
Stranger: accept not really
Stranger: except
You: From there, I graduated with a PhD in Astromedicine and began my work as a space doctor.
Stranger: what do space doctors do?
You: During the Robot Wars, I was drafted as a frontline surgeon, and that's where I received my titanium leg.
You: It's a lot less glamorous than it sounds.
You: We're pretty much doctors in space. We just get paid less, because there's no labour laws.
You: Anyways, after the Robot Wars, I retired to a life of virtual simulation, and that's when I bought the internet chip to connect me to 21st century humanoids.
You: And then you and I meet, and I tell you about my life story.
Stranger: i thought the robot wars were just a myth
You: For now they are. When the reptilians take over things will be different.
Stranger: i was suspicious when arnold became govenator of california and al gore is obviously from the robot side of town
You: But, my food card is running low on ink, and I must replenish it. I wish you good luck on your travels. One question before I leave: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: if by rutskarn you mean a left over kgb spy from russia then yes
Stranger: otherwise no
You: Indeed. Farewell stranger. May we meet again.
Stranger: see you in the future space war

MisterSaturnine
2009-04-07, 01:01 AM
This took the better part of an hour, but it was well worth it...



You kind of win.

Phase
2009-04-07, 01:37 AM
@^: Thank you!

For my next trick, I ramble on with a very pleasant fellow on the subject of whether or not he is Rutskarn!


You: I'd like you to take a seat
Stranger: Hi!
Stranger: Oh.
Stranger: Over here?
You: Yes, please
Stranger: Sure. Thanks.
You: You comfortable?
Stranger: I certainly am, actually, thank you.
Stranger: Now, just what is this all about?
You: Alright, I'm going to submit a series of questions for your consideration.
You: They will be yes or no questions.
Stranger: Alrght. Fire away.
Stranger: I'm ready.
You: Have you ever been dead?
Stranger: I have...thought I may have been, in the past. I did some soul-searching and found out I was wrong.
Stranger: So the answer is no.
You: Do you enjoy Omegle?
Stranger: Yes.
You: Is there a particular reason you enjoy Omegle?
Stranger: I'm not sure why. It makes me lose touch with reality quicker.
You: I see.
You: Are you, in fact, Rutskarn?
Stranger: I...I may be.
Stranger: I don't know.
You: In the event that you are, I would like to purchase a robot Squirrel.
You: But you do not appear to be Rutskarn.
Stranger: A robot squirrel.
You: Yes
Stranger: Do you...do you want the engineering schematic for the creation of robot squirrels?
Stranger: Or just the one...robot squirrel.
You: ...
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: I don't...I don't know oh god!
You: Hmm...
You: Your writing indicates that you are a good candidate...
Stranger: For...being...Rutskarn?
You: Yes...
You: Capitalization, punctuation, that sort of thing...
Stranger: I'm very into the literary arts.
Stranger: Writin' n' such.
You: As is Rutskarn...
Stranger: Hmm...
You: Do you know the following acronym?
Stranger: Perhaps I AM Rutskarn...I just don't know how I would know for sure.
You: GitP?
Stranger: Get in the...pizza.
Stranger: No, I don't know it.
You: Of course, Rutskarn could easily lie, and an impostor could easily tell the truth...
You: Perplexing...
Stranger: Darn!
Stranger: He's one sneaky character, Rustkarn is.
Stranger: Rutskarn.
You: Again, another factor!
You: You seem more Rutskarn every minute!
Stranger: Oh!
Stranger: So...I could be him. I mean, it's possible.
You: This is throwing me for quite a loop...
Stranger: You? I don't know who I AM right now!
You: You are quite likely Rutskarn...
Stranger: And this would mean...
You: But, alternatively, you are not...
Stranger: ...that's...that's true...
You: You are Schrödinger's Rutskarn...
Stranger: I know not what to believe!
Stranger: Ooh, nice one. That was good, bravo.
You: I thank you.
Stranger: So, wait.
Stranger: I am...possibly Rutskarn.
You: Correct.
Stranger: Rutskarn posesses a certain mechanical rodent, which you desire.
You: No, he is a salesman of Mechanical Squirrels, very specifically...
Stranger: Ah, so he has MULTIPLE examples of such a robo-beast!
You: Yes, quite.
You: Of course, there is a good chance that you already knew this.
You: Being Rutskarn.
Stranger: So, then...were I Rutskarn, would I not have in my posession such metal creatures, as-we-speak?
Stranger: Ah.
Stranger: Right.
Stranger: I could have...tricked myself. Or rather, Rutskarn...tricked...
You: There is a chance...
Stranger: My head hurts.
You: You seem very...
You: Rutskarn-ish...
You: This is truly a riddle wrapped in a mystery inside an enigma.
You: Hello?
You: Rutskarn/Notskarn?
You: Oh, fie. I was just getting to the bottom of your identity...
You: Or, rather, whether your identity is that of Rutskarn or not...
Stranger: Ah, I apologize.
You: In any case, I will leave this chat open on the off chance you return.
You: Ah!
You: YOu're back!
Stranger: I was embroiled in a side-query, one of far less importance than whether I am Rutskarn.
You: May I enquire as to the query?
Stranger: Because that is the question I am most interested in answering now.
You: It may help me judge whether you are Rutskarn.
Stranger: A friend seeking advice for...their troubled relationship.
You: Ah...
You: Not as helpful as I would have hoped...
You: But we persevere!
You: Now, a basic question that has subtle connotations...
You: Aperture Science, or Black Mesa?
Stranger: Share, come.
Stranger: Ohhhhhhhh.
Stranger: Oh my.
Stranger: Well...hmm. Wow, that is a toughie.
You: More evidence that you are Rutskarn!
Stranger: Oh, the SUBTLETY!
Stranger: I stew upon my answer, and I am revealed to be more like Rutskarn in my indecision?
You: Yes, for Rutskarn enjoys both Portal and the Half-Life series!
Stranger: I do indeed!
You: "I" do?
You: Rutskarn, you fiend!
You: Or not...
Stranger: I was weighing the enormity of the Half-Life story against the subtle humor and ingenius designs of Portal.
You: Those are the best features of each!
You: Whether you are Rutskarn or not, I respect you, my good man or woman!
Stranger: Why thank you, sir/ma'am!
You: I am a sir!
You: They call me Phase!
Stranger: As am I!
You: More evidence that you are Rutskarn!
Stranger: I would tell you what I am commonly known by, but I fear that I hardly remember.
Stranger: I am...so very lost in my identity, my being or not-being Rutskarn.
You: You are quite peculiar...
You: Much more interesting than the usual fare on Omegle...
You: More evidence that you are Rutskarn!
Stranger: Good sir, we are not so very different.
You: If you insist!
Stranger: I am truly beginning to...feel...how shall I put it...
Stranger: Rutskarn-ish?
You: Exactly!
You: More evidence that you are Rutskarn!
Stranger: The evidence is beginning to become staggering.
You: But can it be beleived?
You: Excuse me, "believed"?
You: I misspelled...
Stranger: No worries!
You: Hmm...
Stranger: I am unsure. I don't know...what to believe.
You: What is your opinion of chainsaws?
Stranger: I appreciate them. Their craft, their use.
You: Well said.
You: I fear a conclusion will be difficult!
You: I must observe with hasty...
Stranger: Take your time.
Stranger: No need to rush.
You: I hope you caught the reference.
Stranger: Right over my head.
You: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOvglodUIcA
You: Submitted for your approval.
You: In the meantime, I must consider whether or not you are Rutskarn...
Stranger: Oh, my GOD.
Stranger: Forgive me for that outburst.
You: You are forgiven.
Stranger: That video was...a lot to take in all at once.
You: The other two are just as...
You: Unigue?
You: Unique, I meant.
Stranger: It certainly was unique.
You: I have realized that Rutskarn would likely be asleep by now...
You: Considering his timezone...
Stranger: Oh dear.
You: But then again, I'm awake far to late myself...
Stranger: He lives in an...odd timezone?
Stranger: I am certainly awake too late for my own good, as well.
You: So it proves absolutely nothing...
You: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOvglodUIcA
You: Wait, wrong Copy Paste...
You: I meant to say...
You: More evidence that you are Rutskarn!
You: I must ask you a few more questions...
Stranger: Ah....aaahhhh.
Stranger: Yes!
Stranger: Of course.
You: If you were to pair a journalist cat with any primate, what sort of primate would it be?
Stranger: That may be a bit advanced for the likes of me.
You: Fine, then...
You: If you were to make any tool (i.e. Screwdriver, Hammer, etc) out of chocolate, which tool would you choose?
Stranger: Hammer. For sure.
You: More evidence that you are Rutskarn!
Stranger: Top-heavy, claws'a good place to start a-chewin'.
Stranger: Gosh!
You: Finally, do you play Team Fortress 2?
Stranger: Absolutely.
Stranger: Avidly.
You: Which is your favorite class?
Stranger: Pyro. I'm...one of those.
You: Do you have an absurd amount of points for Pyro, but very little for the rest?
Stranger: I actually spread my time among nearly all the classes, I just favor the pyro, when I can.
You: Hmm...
You: Not more evidence that you are Rutskarn!
Stranger: I also like to be the Medic, and occasionally the Spy; I am improving with him.
Stranger: And no closer to an aswer!
Stranger: answer.
You: That sounds vaguely similar to myself...
You: But you are more likely Rutskarn...
You: Hmm...
Stranger: More likely than you are to be Rutskarn?
You: More likely that you are Rutskarn than that you are me.
You: I have come to a conclusion...
Stranger: Yes? Yes?
You: Based on your Team Fortress 2 class distribution, I deem you...
You: Not Rutskarn...
Stranger: The suspense is kill...
Stranger: Oh!
Stranger: Oh, okay. So I'm not.
You: Nope, it would appear not...
You: Very close, though...
Stranger: Okay. So I am NOT Rutskarn.
You: Nope.
Stranger: Ah. Well, I'm sorry I couldn't be slightly more Rutskarn this evening.
You: No problem
You: .
You: You were very good and polite.
Stranger: It certainly has been a pleasure.
Stranger: Thank you, thank you.
You: I ask one favor of you.
Stranger: Name it.
You: Your personality would be welcomed and adored at my usual forum.
Stranger: What forum would that be?
You: I invite you to Giant in the Playground games.
You: http://www.giantitp.com/forums/
You: There you will be accepted as one of our own!
Stranger: That sounds most excellent.
You: It would be a shame to miss out on such a strong personality.
Stranger: Thank you, truly, this is wonderful.
You: My user name is Phase.
Stranger: Ha! I am flattered.
Stranger: Phase, I shall look you up promptly.
You: Private Message me once you have joined, and we will welcome you with open arms!
You: Have a good night, and sleep well.
Stranger: I shall!
Stranger: Thank you again, Phase. Rest ye well, sir.
You: Da svidanya!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


At the end, I offer that he joins the forum! I hope to see him soon!

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-07, 02:18 AM
Nobody is rutskarn. I got quite a few 'hang-ups', until:
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi! (When the conversation is over, type $disconnect.)
thanatos5150 (4:14:29 PM): Are you Rutskarn?
OmegleBot (4:14:35 PM): nope
thanatos5150 (4:14:39 PM): Damn!
OmegleBot (4:14:45 PM): yep
thanatos5150 (4:14:45 PM): I thought we were on to him.
OmegleBot (4:14:48 PM): who is that
thanatos5150 (4:15:03 PM): He is... a person, whom we need to speak to.
OmegleBot (4:15:18 PM): ok, why dont you call him
thanatos5150 (4:15:29 PM): that option is no longer a possibility.
OmegleBot (4:15:35 PM): ok
thanatos5150 (4:15:41 PM): Bad aim and all.
OmegleBot (4:15:44 PM): sms email?
thanatos5150 (4:15:49 PM): Bullet passed right through his mobile.
OmegleBot (4:16:10 PM): ok
thanatos5150 (4:16:15 PM): We tried calling the old number and it didn't work.
OmegleBot (4:16:27 PM): k
thanatos5150 (4:16:28 PM): So, he was smart enough to switch numbers
thanatos5150 (4:16:32 PM): Possibly carriers
OmegleBot (4:16:48 PM): alright, well, good luck in finding him.
OmegleBot (4:16:50 PM): Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Wolfbane
2009-04-07, 02:24 AM
I have been doing a little... act, so if you catch on, play along.

After many tries, one finally did.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Welcome!
Stranger: thank you
You: May the battle of wits begin!
Stranger: On your guard!
You: The winner gets the girl, and the loser...
You: is dead
Stranger: the game is?
You: *takes out a pair of wine filled goblets and a small vial*
You: Have you ever seen The Princess Bride?
Stranger: All right. Where is the poison? The battle of wits has begun. It ends when you decide and we both drink, and find out who is right... and who is dead.
You: *bows*
You: You are the first person to catch on
Stranger: do i win?
You: Lets drink, and find out.
You: *takes a goblet*
You: *drinks from it*
Stranger: *takes goblet*(
Stranger: *drinks**laughs*
You: What is so funny?
Stranger: You guessed wrong.
Stranger: That's what's so funny! I switched glasses when your back was turned! Ha ha! You fool! You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The most famous is never get involved in a land war in Asia, but only slightly less well-known is this: never go in against a Sicilian when death is on the line! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha...
Stranger: stops suddenly, and falls dead
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

rubakhin
2009-04-07, 03:46 AM
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: зраствуйте
Stranger: this won't work
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: зраствуйте
Stranger: Jelly tot?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi there
You: зраствуйте
Stranger: russia?
You: Russia.
Stranger: are you a girl?
You: Sometimes.
Stranger: nice
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Is this... god?
You: No, close.
You: Russian man.
You: зраствуйте!

Coidzor
2009-04-07, 05:51 AM
For my next trick, I ramble on with a very pleasant fellow on the subject of whether or not he is Rutskarn!

Excellent convos, monsieur. Excellent. :smallbiggrin: I have indeed, chortled with glee.

Jack Squat
2009-04-07, 06:40 AM
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: Hello there
You: Are you prepared for the inevitable zombie uprising?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I guess he isn't :smalltongue:

Eldan
2009-04-07, 09:02 AM
I failed. I had a normal conversation about asking if he was Rutskarn.

randman22222
2009-04-07, 09:07 AM
Stranger: hi
You: Hello. Are you Rustkarn?
Stranger: hmm ??
You: Can I take that as a no?
Stranger: yes you can
You: Oh good.
You: He wants my soul back.
You: But I have freedom! For the first time in eternity!
Stranger: what the **** are you talkin about ?
You: And it feels sooo good...
Stranger: are you talkin about sex ?
You: Freedom.
You: Free will.
Stranger: where are you from my friend ?
You: The nether planes.
Stranger: f*** you
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: Netherlands?
Stranger: Netherlands?
You: Rustkarn?
Stranger: Netherlands?Netherlands?
You: Rustkarn?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: Hello.
You: Are you Rustkarn?
Stranger: no?
You: You seem unsure...
You: Tell me, how does being unsure of your own identity make you feel?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

This is fun. These strangers don't seem to like me much. I think I just made someone have an identity crisis. :smalltongue:

Wolfbane
2009-04-07, 09:29 AM
Apparently, this one was too clever.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: Hi
Stranger: how are you?
You: Not too bad
You: Yourself?
Stranger: i'm fine
Stranger: where are you from?
You: Mare Ingenii
Stranger: what?
You: Small place
You: Middle of nowhere
Stranger: okay
Stranger: : D
Stranger: it is in africa or asian?
You: Niether, google it
You: It really is the middle of nowhere
Stranger: hmm
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Eldan
2009-04-07, 10:03 AM
You know, this secret agent speak thing is fun.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi.
Stranger: Hello.
You: Sorry about this, but have you seen Rutskarn anywhere?
Stranger: No.
You: If you see him, tell him that the eagle has landed.
You: Alpha 2 will strike tomorrow.
Stranger: oO
You: Oh, and Charlie is out of the picture.
Stranger: Oh, and kill yourself ;/
You: Not yet, I still have a package to deliver.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Wolfbane
2009-04-07, 10:13 AM
:smalleek:
I... met a nice person. Even got her MSN.

Next time she is on, I'll try to convince her to join us here on Giant.

We shall become more!

Felixaar
2009-04-07, 10:24 AM
Cat-calls - or wolf-calls - away, boyyos!

Dragonrider
2009-04-07, 11:31 AM
You: don't i know you from the cinematographer's party?


Am I the ONLY ONE who gets the reference? :smallbiggrin:

randman22222
2009-04-07, 11:45 AM
Am I the ONLY ONE who gets the reference? :smallbiggrin:

Nope. :smallwink:
Hey, ain't it funny that we're walking down the same street at the same time?

^: I butchered that line, but it still works. :smallconfused:

Boo
2009-04-07, 12:03 PM
Let's see...
You: Hello
Stranger: hi
You: I will give you three chances to guess my name.
You: If you cannot guess within three tries, then you will lose your first born child upon their conception.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: Congratulations. You are now playing the game (if you weren't already)
The Game is very simple.
-You are always playing the Game.
-You cannot win. You can only lose.
-Whenever you remember the game, you have to announce out loud "I lose".
-After you lose the game, you have 30 minutes during which you can remember the game without losing.
-As soon as you mention the game to anyone, they begin playing as well.
-The goal of the game is to have everyone on Earth playing.
You: I was already thinking of the game at the time, I'm afraid.
Stranger: Ah well d:
You: I am always thinking of it.
You: It is my everything.
You: It is all that I am.
Stranger: :(
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hi
You: Reginold?
Stranger: nope
You: Runningham?
Stranger: vanessa?
Stranger: nope
You: Oh, Thompson you old dog!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hi
You: Gerald?
Stranger: what?
You: I'm calling someone, do you mind?
You: Gerald, can you hear me?
You: Bloody answer!
You: I'm waiting!
Stranger: don't have Gerald here --'
You: Look, fine, if you're not going to answer, then I'll just hang up!
You: Okay, sorry about that. Who are we?
Stranger: you are very stranger
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
You: I LOVE YOU!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hi
You: Such strange people...
Stranger: huh?
Stranger: What do you mean?
You: Them, they, those 'dudes'.
You: Have you not heard of 'Them'?!
You: They monitor out every move, our every thought, our every desire!
You: It's not too late for you!
Stranger: uhh, okay
Stranger: XD..
You: Get some tinfoil!
You: You must quickly wrap it around your entire body!
You: Make sure to get rid of your clothes, though! They have mics in them!
Stranger: ..okay 8'D
You: Have you secured yourself? Hurry! Before they find out you've talked with someone who knows!
You: I'm safe right now. I'm in one of my hiding spots. They can't get me here.
Stranger: I'm sorry but I don't quite understand you..
You: That's good!
You: They might not take you then!
Stranger: Are you bored or something? XD
You: But it's also bad...
You: You must know the truth!
You: They hunt us down! The people! We! Us few!
Stranger: just what truth are you talking about?
You: Let the truth be told, and all will be revealed!
Stranger: ..right
You: I'm sorry, I have to go! My position has been comprimised!
You have disconnected.
Stranger: hiiiiiiiiiiiiiii :)
You: Brawr
Stranger: ooooer
You: Braaaaaaaaaawr!
You: Braaaawr braaawr brawr braaaaaaaaaaaawr! Brawrawrawrawrawr!
Stranger: ooooer oooooer ooooooooooer
You: Brawr? Brawr braawr!! >:(
Stranger: oooooooooooer oooooooooooooer oooooooooooooooooooer
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: who?
You: Mexican stand-off?
Stranger: /b/
Stranger: wins every tyime
You: I'm sorry, my name isn't Chan.
You: Perhaps you could call Jackie, and ask him what the dilio is.
Stranger: who's mom?
You: Your brothers, sisters, cousins, friends, roomates, landlords, cousins father.
Stranger: kthxbye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hello
Stranger: 8)
You: Tom foolery I say!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hi
Stranger: asl?
You: Hark, a butterfly!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: hi
You: Brawr?
Stranger: i'm a sweet innocent 13 year old girl
You: Brawr! Braaaaaaaawr! >:P
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Stranger: oh hai
You: do u liek mudkipz?
Stranger: I guess they kinda rawk yes
You: Oh, that's too bad.
You have disconnected.
You: I'll google your yahoo if youtube myspace.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Ah.... I'm too lazy to do any more.

Thufir
2009-04-07, 12:13 PM
Conversational idea no. 1: Pretend to be Sylar.

Stranger: hey
You: Hmm...
You: I see...
You: I see it now. It's so simple, so clear the way you fit together.
You: What makes you tick...
Stranger: hmm
Stranger: what makes me tick?
Stranger: what makes you tick?
Stranger: what is the purpose of life?
You: The very fact of your ignorance is further reason why you don't deserve what you have.
You: You cannot hope to understand me.
You: Hard to say. But you'll never find it looking to other people for answers.
You: And once I find you, you'll never have a chance to find it.
Stranger: a one way conversation
Stranger: very intersting
You: Interesting to your basic level of comprehension, perhaps.
Stranger: [/sarcasm]
Stranger: a very sparkling conversation
You: I'm starting to wonder if this is even worth my time...
You: Ability or not, you're remarkably dull...
Stranger: well
Stranger: first of all
Stranger: you act extremely superior after talking to me for what? 2 minutes
Stranger: and haven't replied anything
Stranger: *I haven't
Stranger: or said
You: I can't really be blamed because you failed to link my responses to your questions
Stranger: well yes
Stranger: i am very stupid
Stranger: and not a nutter like you
Stranger: i am so extremely sorry
Stranger: [/sarcasm]
You: Hmm. Their files don't seem to mention anyone who fits your description...
You: Not many people can slip under their radar.
Stranger: hmhm
Stranger: and if I may be so bold
You: So why are you here anyway?
Stranger: who is 'they'?
Stranger: just bored
Stranger: came across the site
You: The longer you continue talking to me the more likely they are to notice.
Stranger: and here i am
You: Naturally I have nothing to worry about...
Stranger: and then i'll be killed?
Stranger: taken away?
You: But then, you're not me.
Stranger: deleted from existence?
Stranger: hmhm
You: Seems the legislation to have us killed would be hard to push through.
Stranger: thought so
You: Convenient for me, of course.
Stranger: hmhm
You: As long as you're alive, well...
You: Building 26 could turn into a very attractive prospect. I can get in there easy enough, and just pick off whoever I want, like cherries off a branch.
Stranger: if you don't mind
Stranger: i am going to prepare some fuel for my brain
Stranger: so
Stranger: bye
You: Be seeing you.
You: Briefly.
Stranger: I'll be looking out for it

Wolfbane
2009-04-07, 12:25 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Cap'N! The engines! She can't hold no more!
Stranger: OH NOES ?
You: They are start'n to redline!
Stranger: i didn't understand.............
Stranger: ...:'D
You: Sir, what are your order?
You: orders*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

We exploded apparently.

randman22222
2009-04-07, 01:02 PM
We exploded apparently.

I like that'n. :smallbiggrin: Nicely done.

This one... Made me reach for brain acid. Profanity and not-so-lovely imagery abound:

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: **** you
You: You as well.
You: How's life?
Stranger: yeah its okay, got holidays :D
You: Yup, same here.
You: Using it to finish writing this song for our band.
You: Or, trying to use it as such. Keep getting sidetracked.
Stranger: oha nice, you have a site?
Stranger: the site of your band
You: Not yet. This is our first song, and I'm not even sure how dedicated my band members are. :p
Stranger: :D
You: It may be that I'll just continue writing material until I have a real band.
Stranger: whats genre you play?
You: It's... I'm not sure what to label it as. It ranges from modern pop rock to... I'm not sure what to label the other end as.
You: It's like classical-infused soft rock type... Sting. Have you listened to Sting's stuff?
Stranger: for sure
Stranger: but thats not my music style normally
You: Ahh good. It ranges from modern pop rock to Sting's solo type stuff. :P
Stranger: i neary just listen to punk^^
You: Oooh, cool.
You: What bands?
Stranger: mostly small german ones
Stranger: but alyso rancid, nofx or anti-flag(very good band!)
You: Die Ärzte?
Stranger: i know them, but i dont really like them^^
Stranger: where are you from?
You: German American. I don't feel like I'm either, though.
Stranger: oha nice
Stranger: you speak german? xD
You: Nur ein bisschen. Ich muss mehr lernen... :S
You: I mispelled that, didn't I?
You: It doesn't look right...
Stranger: no, it was totally right
Stranger: es war absolut richtig :)
You: Ah, gut. :D
You: You play any instruments?
Stranger: if you speak german you will understand this: ich muss kacken, also disconnecte ich dann jezt mal ;)
Stranger: nono^^ im to lazy for that :D
You: I sorta understood it...
Stranger: bye :D
You: You have to... something... and that you'll disconnect.
You: Cya.
Stranger: wait
You: Yeah?
Stranger: kacken means to go to the toilet and produce some **** :D (just for your german sudies) :D

averagejoe
2009-04-07, 01:17 PM
Am I the ONLY ONE who gets the reference? :smallbiggrin:

Nope. But who am I to go against the wind?

Thufir
2009-04-07, 01:20 PM
Well, after 5 conversations ended after the first thing I said, and one actual conversation, I decided to start quoting:

You: The rest is silence.
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: whost that?
Stranger: knock knock
Stranger: no, i hate silence
Stranger: plzzzz
Stranger: i beg uuu
Stranger: *puppy eyes*
You: Demand me nothing; what you know, you know. From this time forth I never will speak word.
Stranger: youre interesting
Stranger: know i get it. You are some kind of spirit or something.
You: Who buzzeth in mine ears I am a spirit?
Stranger: me :D
Stranger: are u?
You: I am not what I am.
Stranger: ur cool
Stranger: well, be in silence. Farewell
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

A Rainy Knight
2009-04-07, 02:09 PM
Did you know that Rick Astley will be the bringer of Armageddon?


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Shall we dance?
Stranger: Do you mean you and me? No I do not have a body yet.
You: Do you want me to help you find one?
Stranger: No unknown person, maybe later.
You: Okay then.
You: Is now late enough?
Stranger: Signs point to yes. Ask Alison if it is.
You: Sorry... she keeps telling me "Outlook cloudy. Ask again."
Stranger: Once more? What is your favorite movie?
You: Once more into the breach! And UHF.
Stranger: Perhaps I'm just expressing my own concern about it.
Stranger: Also, how would you feel if I were to tell you that I've been feeding your comments into this chatbot?
Stranger: http://www.pandorabots.com/pandora/talk?botid=f5d922d97e345aa1
Stranger: :D
You: I would feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
You: *warm fuzzies*
Stranger: That's what she said >_>
You: Yes. When you fed her comments into a chatbot.
Stranger: I said that's what she said to the chatbot but she didn't get it >_>
Stranger: Stupid computers >_>
You: She said that he might be saying about her what she said about him.
You: That's what she said!
Stranger: Was that an ultra-obscure xkcd reference?
Stranger: Please tell me it was D:
You: Yeah, basically.
Stranger: Oh **** yeah. So, wanna get married?
You: Let's ask the 8-ball.
You: "HELL YES."
Stranger: Awesome! So what music shall we have at the wedding?
You: Ska punk?
Stranger: I had this in mind, personally...
Stranger: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHg5SJYRHA0
You: Yes.
Stranger: ...I'm so sorry D:
You: That' okay.
You: He can jump out of the wedding cake.
Stranger: Excellent. You will make a great civil partner.
Stranger: This is a good idea.
You: Yes... life partner.
Stranger: Only problem is...
You: That Rick Astley is a notorious cakeaphobic?
Stranger: I like cake, you see. In fact, square-centimetre per square-centimetre, Rick Astley is worth less than cake.
You: But pound for pound, they're almost equal.
Stranger: So really, we'd be lowering the total value of our cake by hollowing a Rick Astley-shaped hole in it.
Stranger: *thinks* This is an excellent point.
Stranger: So ideally, then, we need some means of compressing Rick Astley.
You: Spears have excellent points too.
Stranger: That's also what she said >_>
You: I will begin work on the Rick Compressor tonight.
Stranger: Excellent.
Stranger: Ideally it should be nonfatal
You: Ideally, of course.
You: I could test it on mice first.
Stranger: But if we have to launch his crushed, bloodied remains out of a cake, so be it.
You: You can't have your cake and keep it unbloody, too.
Stranger: That's true. We'd have to have a hole cut in the top so the Rick Cube could fly out of it.
You: We should film it and put it on YouTube.
Stranger: Although it might just then hit the ceiling and drip blood over the cake.
You: RICKCUBE'D
Stranger: Aw hell yeah :D
You: We need a long enough mop to clean the ceiling, of course.
Stranger: Or we could resurrect and subsequently hire Robert Wadlow as janitor.
You: Maybe the Rick Cube could be launched fast enough to go into orbit.
Stranger: A brilliant idea :D
You: That might take more work than just getting a big mop.
Stranger: Yeah.
You: But it'd be worth it.
Stranger: It'd be hard to calculate the trajectory.
Stranger: Maybe I should email Rick Astley to try and find out his mass.
You: "Houston, this is the ISS... we've got the Rick Cube approaching us fast, requesting assist..."
Stranger: Or we could estimate it at... say... 75 kilos.
Stranger: Oh yeah, and of course, bonus points would have to be awarded for taking out Hubble with the RickCube.
Stranger: Scratch that - the RickCube(TM)
You: What could be better than a twofer?
You: Two birds with one Rick.
Stranger: Yes indeed :D
You: Build a cloning device. Two Ricks with one stone.
Stranger: Now that would just be redundant D:
You: Just a little.
Stranger: Also it'd have to be an open-air wedding, so he didn't blast through the ceiling.
You: Good idea.
Stranger: Alternatively, we could just blast through the ceiling.
You: Even better idea.
Stranger: Yeah. I mean, I never liked that ceiling anyway.
You: Time to design an armor-piercing RickCube and market it to the military.
Stranger: A rick spear, perhaps?
You: Rick ICBMs are what I want to see.
Stranger: All you'd have to do is a) starve him and stick a spike on his head or b) stick him in a car crusher.
You: YOU GOT RICKNUKE'D
Stranger: Maybe we could make a mod for DEFCON.
You: Superhuman Rick cyborgs, perhaps?
Stranger: Of course, we'd have to work out what exactly is needed to set off a chain reaction of hydrogen fission in Rick Astley.
You: Cake.
You: And that is why he fears it.
Stranger: This presents a problem.
You: A delicious problem.
Stranger: We can't launch the RickNuke from a cake.
Stranger: 'cause he'd just explode on contact.
You: Have diplomats send cakes to every major world city.
You: Phase Two will then begin.
Stranger: Excellent. For this we'll need positions in high places to place the cakes. I've spoken to FEMA and they will have finalised your appointment within the week.
You: This pleases me.
Stranger: What, the appointment to FEMA or the ridiculously obscure Deus Ex reference?
You: The prospect of using Rick Astley to obliterate civilization.
Stranger: Oh, and if this doesn't work, we could just create a device to lower a cake into the RickWarhead when at a certain altitude.
You: Sounds good enough.
Stranger: Indeed. Well, it's been good talking to you. I must leave now to begin the plan at once.
You: Farewell my friend.
Stranger: Farewell. *looks up recipes for cake*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

randman22222
2009-04-07, 02:14 PM
Did you know that Rick Astley will be the bringer of Armageddon?



You win. This thread.

Wolfbane
2009-04-07, 02:39 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hey!
You: Sir! The Zerg are swarming!
Stranger: No they aren't
You: *points at the large army of zerg rushing the chat*
You: I believe they are.
Stranger: I believe not.
You: Then what are your orders? To let us die?
Stranger: Oh! You want to play something.. Uh.. No, I command you to destroy them all! :D
You: *salutes*
You: I will do my best.
Stranger: Good!
You: *points to a group of Marines*
You: Man the guns and start shooting the heavies!
Stranger: Omg, this is kinda weird... :P BYE! :D
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I think he was an infested spy.

Cristo Meyers
2009-04-07, 03:11 PM
We should set a standing goal to break someone so thorougly that they leave the chat afraid to ever leave the home again.

Rutskarn
2009-04-07, 04:49 PM
Wow, this guy was pretty rare.


Stranger: Hi
You: Hey.
Stranger: Where r u drom ?
Stranger: **from
You: Well, right now, West Philadelphia.
You: That's the problem.
You: See, I've spent my whole life here, right?
Stranger: ok
You: Well, some punks starting coming into my neighborhood and making trouble.
You: Starting fights, graffiti, etc.
You: I was just staying away from it, right?>
Stranger: Man...its a big problem
You: Well, last week, I got stupid and got into a fight with them.
You: So my mom, she just freaks out.
You: She says this neighborhood is too rough for me.
Stranger: not good
You: And now I gotta go live with my uncle in some stupid suburb.
You: Apparently, it's called "Bel-Air" or something.
Stranger: Bel-air ?
You: Yeah, Bel Air.
You: This is so inconsiderate of her.
You: It just turns my life flip-upside-down, you know?
Stranger: Yeah...
You: You know what, though?
Stranger: i wanna help u, nut im so far...
You: I'm staying postive.
You: I'm probably gonna rule that place like a king.
You: Or at least a prince.
You: I like the sound of that..."Fresh Prince of Bel Air."
Stranger: like the fresh prince of belair
Stranger: hahaha
Stranger: Will smith rules
You: Wait.
You: How the hell did you know my name?
Stranger: hahahahahaha
You: This is creepy.
You: I'm leaving.

Eldan
2009-04-07, 05:05 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Sweden?
You: In Scandinavia.
You: It's a country.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And a strange one:

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Oh god, a stranger!
Stranger: Oh stranger, a god!
You: Which one?
Stranger: Athena
You: Pleased to metcha.
Stranger: the pleasure is mine?
You: No, I already took it.
Stranger: is that the way to be polite? haha
Stranger: [at my comment, not yours]


Then I tried to mess with people:

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hello, good evening
You: Help me.
You: Listen.
You: You gotta memorize this.
You: It won't mean anything to you.
You: But tomorrow, someone will ask for it.
You: 2-8-5-5-3-0-9-1
Stranger: You make me curious
You: Good luck.
You: You'll need it.
Stranger: number for the lotery?
You: Heh. Good one.
Stranger: If then, I will write it down imediately:P
You: Okay.
You: Tomorrow, someone will ask you if you are Rutskarn.
You: If they do, tell them this number.
Stranger: What is Rutskarn?
You: Doesn't matter. It's a code.
You: So you know who to tell the number to.
Stranger: maybe I wont be here tomorrow
You: Oh, they will find you.
You: Again, good luck.
You have disconnected.

Allysian
2009-04-07, 07:16 PM
Hehehehe. Funs.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heyy
You: Hi!
Stranger: man or woman
You: boy.
Stranger: how old?
You: .....RAAAAAPE!!!!

Fostire
2009-04-07, 07:41 PM
Hehehehe. Funs.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heyy
You: Hi!
Stranger: man or woman
You: boy.
Stranger: how old?
You: .....RAAAAAPE!!!!

I almost fell off my chair laughing with that one :smallbiggrin::smallbiggrin::smallbiggrin:

Alteran
2009-04-07, 09:45 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: hi!
You: Rutskarn...is that...is that you?
Stranger: yea
You: Oh my gosh!
You: Rutskarn!
Stranger: =]
You: It's, it's been so long!
You: I made a song...for you.
Stranger: indeed it has
You: Here, I'll start now.
You: *cough*
You: Rai...
You: Sorry, I'm a bit nervous.
You:
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
You: Brown paper packages tied up with strings
These are a few of my favorite things
You: Cream colored ponies and crisp apple streudels
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
These are a few of my favorite things
Stranger: **** YOU
You:
Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Silver white winters that melt into springs
These are a few of my favorite things
You: Rut...Rutskarn?
You: I'm going to keep going...
Stranger: what do u want *******
You: *cough*

When the dog bites
When the bee stings
When I'm feeling sad
I simply remember my favorite things
And then I don't feel so bad.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

:smallfrown: again.

Sneak
2009-04-07, 10:38 PM
Am I the ONLY ONE who gets the reference? :smallbiggrin:


Nope. :smallwink:
Hey, ain't it funny that we're walking down the same street at the same time?

^: I butchered that line, but it still works. :smallconfused:


Nope. But who am I to go against the wind?

:smallbiggrin:

Anyway, I've got some more.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hey
Stranger: hi
Stranger: male our female?
You: male your female?
Stranger: i ansk frist
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Postmodernism, eh?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: So.
Stranger: asl?
You: 4/both/Nigeria
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hey.
Stranger: hey
You: How bout that Great Gatsby, eh?
You: What a loser.
Stranger: haha o,o
Stranger: where are u from
You: I mean, dedicating his whole life to finding one individual?
You: Seriously?
You: Are you Rutskarn, by the way?
Stranger: dont think so o,o
You: DAMMIT!
You: NO!
Stranger: have no idea whats you talking about
You: I'VED DEDICATED MY WHOLE LIFE TO FINDING HIM!
You: DAMMIT!
You: I have to leave.
Stranger: >:
You: I have to keep searching.
Stranger: bye babe
You: I am sorry.
You: Goodbye.
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I love you.
You: Will you marry me?
Stranger: love you too
Stranger: yes
Stranger: of course
You: That's awesome.
You: One second, I just have to go make some arrangements.
Stranger: yeah
You: I'll be back in one second, I promise.
Stranger: but... are you a zombie?
You: I will never ever leave you.
You: I will always be by your side.
You: I shall return.
You have disconnected.

Dragonrider
2009-04-07, 10:48 PM
Did you know that Rick Astley will be the bringer of Armageddon?

*shnip*

...

I hope you got that guy's contact information, because he BELONGS here. :smallbiggrin:

...Oh, yeah. You're awesome too. :smalltongue: That was some quality conversation, right there!

TFT
2009-04-08, 12:48 AM
Hmm... I had an intersting experience with this site.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hey.
You: AHA I FOUND YOU!
Stranger: Yes you did!
You: ...You are my long lost brother, right?
You: if your aren't, I will be very disappointed :(
Stranger: Are you my brother? Staring back at me? Trapped inside another world? My lost twin?
You: The mirror world, the world I am in
Connection imploded.

That, being my first conversation, was a little strange. My luck turned...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ...That was a close one.
Stranger: sure was
Stranger: now what
You: Now, we find the treasure!
Stranger: ok press the button
You: I will.
You: Right now.
Stranger: we will teleport
Stranger: do it
You: You imput the Maps coordinates
You: Right?
Stranger: **** maps
Stranger: we got stars
You: But the map leads to the treasure! ...Alright, screw the map
You: *presses the button*
Stranger: were going old school constellations
Stranger: i feel woozy
Stranger: ok i am better now
You: Good
You: I didn't want you throwing up all over me.
Stranger: no
You: ...yes?
Stranger: so what do you think
You: I think we are lost
Stranger: ****
Stranger: look up
You: k
You: *looks up*
Stranger: what do you see
You: Stars.
Stranger: perfect
Stranger: were found
You: Oh, ok
You: I thought we were lost for a second
Stranger: no

That conversation continued for a bit longer. I enjoyed it a lot.

Stranger: Hi :3
You: Hello.
Stranger: Ushi?
You: Bless You.
Stranger: Yes.
You: So, did you hear about the thing at the place?
You: You going to be there?
Stranger: What place? Nobody told me about the place! Oh, the place! The place! Why was I not informed?!
You: Because you were out of the loop for months. You really need to get back to us more often.
You: We have been waiting for your message. It is the key.
Stranger: THE APPLE HOLDS THE KEY
You: THAT IS THE MESSAGE!
Stranger: IT IS!
You: I need to inform our agent at the place.
Stranger: Yes.
You: He will be very pleased.
Stranger: He will.
You: Good work.
Stranger: Yes.
You: Your next assignment: Go find Rutskarn.
You: Whatever cost.
You: ...I apologize, I gave you false information.
Stranger: WRYYYYYYYYY
You: It is not Rutskarn you are finding, that was supposed to be top secret.
Stranger: Oh!
You: You must now be terminated, you have 10 minutes.
You: Goodbye.
You have disconnected.

Another conversation I enjoyed.

Stranger: ...hi
You: Give me the password.
You: Now.
Stranger: I'm looking for Leo...
Stranger: is that not the pass phrase?
You: That is, in fact the pass phrase.
You: How is it going, agent Leo?
Stranger: Well enough
You: Did you complete your mission?
Stranger: Agents Dog, Silver, and Wolf have been distributed the plans
You: Ah, very good.
Stranger: Mission begins at 1:00 PM Wednesday
Stranger: Expected to be a success
You: You will, of course, report that success afterwards.
Stranger: Naturally
Stranger: Unitl then - I fear being traced, and must cut short.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

From what I see, the people on the site are fun to chat will - Will have to do it more often.

Ash08
2009-04-08, 03:05 PM
here's my first conversastion, rather boring and I was being me, instead of "in character"...
You: hi
Stranger: hallo
Stranger: do you have a sword?
You: yes, yes I do
You: I'm part of SCA, what do you expect?
Stranger: pirate or ninja?
You: SCA!
Stranger: wtf is SCA?
You: that means I'm a Knight, which is superior to both Pirates and Ninjas(although Pirates are pretty cool)
You: actually I'm a squire...
You: but still
You: I'm getting there
Stranger: England?
You: nope, California, SCA is an American organization
You: we're reinactors
You: it's awesome!
Stranger: ohhhh
Stranger: do you D&D too?
You: sepreatly, but yeah
You: I do play D&D
You: do you?
Stranger: I'll put on my cloak and wizard hat
You: *laughs* no, no I only dress up for SCA(I'm taking that as a no)
You: do you have a sword?
Stranger: lol ok, you seem alright, so I'ma let you go...I'm really just here to troll people
You: of course, how.... disrespectfully intresting of you
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


since then I've tried some intresting ones where I'm a guy from Greenland working in an office in India working for Omegle as a "chatter", I've fooled at least 2 people, it's pretty fun.

Thanatos 51-50
2009-04-08, 03:58 PM
thanatos5150 (5:55:06 AM): Another dorpped chat, right?
OmegleBot (5:55:06 AM): hi
thanatos5150 (5:55:12 AM): Oh, thank God.
OmegleBot (5:55:16 AM): haha
OmegleBot (5:55:19 AM): hello
thanatos5150 (5:55:26 AM): listen, its vitally important that you know this:
thanatos5150 (5:55:40 AM): I have information on this "Rutskarn" guy.
OmegleBot (5:55:45 AM): i need you to tell me right now
thanatos5150 (5:55:50 AM): Rutskarn is trying to take over the multiverse!
OmegleBot (5:56:07 AM): yea go on
thanatos5150 (5:56:09 AM): Wait, you're... not Rutskarn, are you?
OmegleBot (5:56:20 AM): i am im an imposter
thanatos5150 (5:56:24 AM): <Expletive>
thanatos5150 (5:56:28 AM): $disconnect

Nano
2009-04-08, 10:49 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: HELLOOO
Stranger: ARE YOU TLAKING???
You: Ain't no mountain hiiiigh enough!
Stranger: ARE YOU DEAF???
You: Ain't no valley loooow enough!
Stranger: ARE YOU A CRACH HEAD.
Stranger: I THINK YOU ARE.
You: Ain't no river wiiiide enough, to keep me from gettin' to you, babe!
You have disconnected.

I kinda lost my cool at the end, there.

wojonatior
2009-04-08, 11:46 PM
My fail of a Rutskarn


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: rutskarn?
Stranger: I do not know your meaning
Stranger: where are you
You: are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no
Stranger: what is Rutskarn?
You: A person...
Stranger: no
Stranger: who are you
You: who owes me something...
Stranger: what
You: I am Rutskarn!!!
Stranger: you owe yourself
You: Ahhhhhh paradox
You: must escape...
You have disconnected.

Wow... Just wow...


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: boo
Stranger: ...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I also found out that if you connect around 11:30-12:30ish(-5:00) you get a Ton of Chinese people. Because that is when a bunch of the kids in school get lunch break :smallbiggrin:. In about 3 omegle chats I got 2 of them.

Coplantor
2009-04-09, 01:25 AM
OK, this was funny

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello

i would like to play a game

the device you are wearing is set to go off in one minute after this tape is finished

think of the device is a ... reverse bear trap

you have to find the key in your dead cell mates stomache

let the game begin.
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no i am jigsaw
You: I already SAW the movie
Stranger: **** YOU AND YOUR PUNNS
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And this one was intresting

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: if you want me to be
Stranger: i'll be anything you want
You: Well, it depends
You: Lets just say
You: that hypotetically
Stranger: yes...
You: you are Rutskarn
Stranger: okay...
You: So, in the case that you take his place
Stranger: um hum....
You: would you finish the deal we started?
Stranger: what kind of deal?
You: Well, I have a certain "thing" he wants
You: Aaaaand
You: he has the money I need
Stranger: what thing is this you speak of. i have lots of money
You: Well
You: You see
Stranger: yes...
You: I met Rutskarn here, in Omegle
You: We talked for a bit
Stranger: understandable...
You: I told him my current situation, wich is'nt quite... comfortable
You: I have five kids
You: My wife was pregnant
You: And she gaved birth to twins
Stranger: um hum...
Stranger: 7....
You: Here in the village, twins are a bad omen
Stranger: okay...
You: Besides, one of the kids was born with the umbilical cord wrapped around his right leg
Stranger: thats awful.
You: and it didnt fully develop
You: Mr. Rutskarn has a problem of his own
You: Lets just say that he is "shooting blanks"
Stranger: and what is that??
Stranger: awe. i see
You: And, well, he REALLY wants to have a kid
Stranger: i see.
You: And, as you can tell, I have one too many kids
Stranger: ah yes. it is clear now
You: It is hard to mantain such a large family with a coal miner wage
Stranger: i imagine
You: So I'm willing to "exchange" the defective kid in order to save the rest of the family
You: he will be remembered as a hero
Stranger: if you are telling the truth you are awful and if you are making this up...this is the funniest **** i have ever participated in.
You: Well, if you are a rich guy shooting blanks willing to pay any price for a "normal" family the this is all true, if not then "hahaha, I really got you dude!"
Stranger: this has been awesome.
You: Well thanks I guess, I cant imagine how that will save my family
You: We ate our dog last week
You: And he was my second wife
You: We really miss old tucker, a good partner and a delicious meal
You: I wish my first wife tasted so good
You: Or died as silently
You: I had to run over her with the car like five times before she would shut up
You: And no, I wont sell the car
You: That's where we live
Stranger: HAHAHAHa. your imagination is hilarious
You: Yeah... imagination
You: hahaha, I really got you.... right?
Stranger: will you marry me?
You: Please dont call the cops
Stranger: if you"ll marry me.
You: It depends... would you describe yourself rather "sweet" "bitter" or "sour"?
Stranger: all of them
You: And how well do you go with salads?
Stranger: i'm delicious on salads
You: OK, sounds fine. My biggest kid wants to know if you are a man or a woman
You: Not that it would change the flavour
Stranger: man. burly man.
Stranger: with mountain ****.
You: Oh, that goes against my religion.
Stranger: that is not true
Stranger: me too
You: Local priest would lock me in the torturecells
You: That's where I met my wife
Stranger: how sweet
Stranger: you are rediculous and i love it.
You: We both got locked the same day
Stranger: by the way you're talking to like five people
Stranger: for what?
You: I missed a spot of the priest's car and he had a really big date that day
You: Cleaning was never my thing
Stranger: are you a servant.
You: I was a servant
You: there's a big different
You: I earned my freedom with years of hard labor and occasional unwillingfull intercourse
Stranger: so you were a sex slave.
Stranger: that is dreadful
You: Oh no
Stranger: where are you from
You: See, beign a sex slave means that having sex with your slave is legal
You: But sex with slaves is illegal here
Stranger: ah i see..
Stranger: where is this
You: It didnt make any difference though, with the priest beign the major and the police
You: I dont know why we keep voting for him
Stranger: have you thought of running away.
You: And leave my car and my family behind?
Stranger: you can come live on the moon with me and my grandmother.
You: What kind of monster does that to one's own family?
You: Family is sacred
Stranger: bring them. there's plenty of room
You: The moon you say?
You: Wich side of it?
Stranger: yes.
Stranger: the dark side
Stranger: we have lights though
You: Oh, where dracula's palace is
You: Sorry, I'm allergic to vampires
Stranger: yes but he is always sleeping around with the mooners so i never really see him
Stranger: thats too bad.
You: And they have a nasty tendency of sucking other peoples blood
You: And Ivan told me once that they are terrible neighbors
Stranger: actually they are not partial to human blood. they prefer panda blood.
You: Panda blood?
Stranger: yes. black. white. cuddly.
You: Those must be vampires from asia
You: terrible people they are
Stranger: how dare you.
You: not only do they suck your blood, but they also solve math problems while doing so
You: And if there is one thing my family cannot stand is mathematicians
You: Yeah
Stranger: sesame street
Stranger: **** math
You: All my life was ruined because of mathematicians
You: I was the best in the class you know?
Stranger: they should all die
You: I could've been anything I wanted
Stranger: you still can
Stranger: you just have to believe
You: I could've be the slave of someone more important
You: like the guy who lives in front of me
You: he has a pool
Stranger: nice.
You: I could be his pool cleaner
You: but no
You: A kid who was better in maths than me camed in and all of a sudden I was the second smartest kid
Stranger: **** that guy
You: So he was the only one who got to go to the university
You: And now Im here, stucked in a filthy coal mine
Stranger: i'm at university
You: With my lovable family
You: You think you are better than me?
Stranger: absolutely not. we are equal
You: Wow
You: sorry
You: your life must suck then
Stranger: yep. i have to pick up moon rocks and i can't even say all day because there is no day on the dark side of the moon.
You: Dont you hate it when the gyspsies get in your car and try to take your kids without paying for them?
Stranger: gypsies are terrible people
You: Yes they are
You: They are smelly and noisy
You: I wish the priest would to something about them
Stranger: and do drugs
You: But all he does is taking bribes from them
You: I dont see how that is a solution to our problem
Stranger: elect some one else
You: Yeah, we could
You: But we dont know how someone else would run the village
You: At least we know that this guy cannot be trusted
You: But what do we know about the rest?
Stranger: how about an uprising
You: They are almost total strangers
You: An uprising?
Stranger: like us
You: That's madness
Stranger: but it may be necessary for happiness
You: The major has at least four body guards, that's more than enough to take on the whole village
You: I mean, most of the population is still on diapers
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



EDIT: OK, one more

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no
Stranger: come from
You: From where?
Stranger: you
You: You come from me?
You: Danny?
You: Is that you?
Stranger: OMG
You: Why did you runned away?
Stranger: usa?
You: Dont you love your mother anymore?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

The Rose Dragon
2009-04-13, 03:52 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: yo yo
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: i most certainly am not!
You: Aha!
You: I found you!
You: Seriously, dude, pay up.
Stranger: you totally didn't find me
You: Lying won't help you.
Stranger: i don't owe you that anymore
Stranger: i paid you with...favours...remember?
You: Dude, those favors were totally invalid.
You: I want cash this time.
Stranger: that's not what you said at the time!
Stranger: you said..."ooohhh yeahhh, this will absolve all debt"
You: I didn't know the bank would refuse to cash in your favors.
Stranger: well you work for the bank so you should have known...
You: Dude, that bank went bankrupt, remember?
You: I had to go to this other bank.
You: One that wasn't bankrupt.
Stranger: see, i didn't know that
Stranger: i will never pay you
You: Of course you will.
Stranger: i'll see you in court
You: What court?
You: Remember how I'm the Supreme Judge of All Earth and Other Dominions?
Stranger: um
Stranger: the um...supreme court of canada?
You: Under my jurisdiction.
Stranger: oh snap
Stranger: *runs*
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Rutskarn, you owe me two cents. That is all.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: CLAMS!
You: CHINESE VAMPIRES!
Stranger: whoa let's not get discriminatory
Stranger: how do you know they were chinese
You: Well, they had rigor mortis and were hopping around with their arms outstretched.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

InaVegt
2009-04-13, 04:15 PM
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Is this Fred?
Stranger: yeah
You: Okay, good.
Stranger: is this Mario?
You: The cops are getting closer to ya, and they found the body.
You: Yeah.
You: You need to flee the country, they will hang you if they catch you.
You: That's it for now.

That's mine.

Neko Toast
2009-04-13, 04:19 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: are u from holland?
You: No, I'm from Uzbekistan.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I wanted to try that at least once. It made me laugh.

Dragonrider
2009-04-14, 10:28 AM
Hmm....... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NL36U6BElRE)

The Rose Dragon
2009-04-14, 03:45 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

At least give me a chance, dude!

Sneak
2009-04-14, 04:21 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi!
You: HEY.
You: I'm Brazilian.
Stranger: me too
Stranger: haha
You: Wow, really?
Stranger: yeah
You: Huh.
You: This is awkward, then.
You: I'm not really Brazilian.
Stranger: .-.
Stranger: lol
You: Um, yeah.
You: Er.
Stranger: where r u ?
You: I should go.
You: Uh.
You: Sorry.
You: Bye.
You have disconnected.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hey.
You: I'm Brazilian.
Stranger: I'm from the future. I don't have much time. I can only answer one question.
Stranger: oh, nevermind, I don't wanna waste the future on a brazilian
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Jerk. :smallannoyed:


Hmm....... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NL36U6BElRE)

Haha. I like his parents' reaction at the end. :smalltongue:

It bothers me that he pronounces it "Oh-MEG-lay," though. I pronounce it "Oh-MEG-ull." (Like Omeggle.)

And obviously, my way is the right way. :smalltongue:

Dragonrider
2009-04-14, 06:49 PM
It bothers me that he pronounces it "Oh-MEG-lay," though. I pronounce it "Oh-MEG-ull." (Like Omeggle.)

And obviously, my way is the right way. :smalltongue:

In an earlier video, he talked about how he had no clue how to pronounce it. :smalltongue:

Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins
2009-04-14, 10:49 PM
Hah, that was fun. I started up talking about my obligation to ask a question with this guy, then finally asked him if he was rutskarn. In several ways that I cannot post because I didn't record the conversation as it quickly led to him thinking I was asking to porn and then to a discussion about how tiny and crappy our respective hometowns were.

He was not Rutskarn, but was very nice about it all, even that part where I statrting mocking the fact that the Caucks once burned down the White House. Anyway, I much enjoyed it as he seemed to appreciate my rather random sense of humour. We parted amiciably.


The next conversation was less civil, involving me being cussed out for asking if he was Rutskarn, and then disconnecting.

I quite enjoy this feeling of Rutskarn-wielding power.

Rutskarn
2009-04-14, 10:58 PM
I'm still waiting for someone to actually ask me if I'm Rutskarn.

Coplantor
2009-04-14, 11:04 PM
Dont worry, I'm looking for you.
Curiously, my last two conversations with girls that started asking "Are you Rutskarn?", ended with them giving me their E-mails...

Rutskarn, you are a great pick up line.

Also, after two days of Omeggleing, I felt an urge to ask people on the street if they were rutskarn.

Rutskarn
2009-04-14, 11:23 PM
Unless California annexes Uruguay, or vice versa, I'd say that's a pretty remote possibility.

We should try that out in bars, though.

"Hey there, hot stuff, I can't help but notice that you're sitting alone. Can I buy you a drink? Come here often? Are you Rutskarn?"

Better than my current line, which is, "Are you now, or have you ever been, a member of the communist party?"

Coplantor
2009-04-14, 11:43 PM
I hope you are older than me because I want to be like you when I grow up.

I'm going to build an altar in your name next to my bed.

Mauve Shirt
2009-04-14, 11:45 PM
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: NO
You: lol Has anyone else asked you that?
Stranger: YES
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-04-15, 01:03 AM
Thought I'd pop in for a quickie.


Stranger: convince me not to brush my teeth right now
You: Okay.
Stranger: That's your goal.
You: I coated your toothbrush in feces.
Stranger: ...ew
You: There ya go.
Stranger: you win
You: Guess so.
Stranger: please uncoat it
You: Well, I'll give it a shot
You: Rodent feces tends to cling.
Stranger: Ok. no worries.
You: Off to try that now.
You: Adios.
Stranger: mkay
Stranger: bye



EDIT: Couple more.



You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: no
You: I would assume not.
You: Seeing as I am he.
You: And he is I.
Stranger: haha
You: Now we have established you as an honest man.
You: Or woman.
You: Or hermaphrodite.
You: Point is, you have my trust.
Stranger: woman
You: Details.
Stranger: my honor
You: Thus, I may entrust in you a certain fact.
You: Don't drink Pepsi after October of this year.
You: Not because of Antrhax poisoning, or anything.
You: Just because Pepsi tastes terrible.
You: So, I guess just don't drink it.
You: ...
You: Yeah.
Stranger: i got it
You: Right.
Stranger: thx
You: Conversation over.



You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: no i guess
You: Correct.
You: Now on to question two.
You: The first two brothers to attain manned flight were:
Stranger: wtf
You: a.) The Wright Brothers
You: b.) The Mongolfier Brothers.
You: c.) The Marx Brothers
Stranger: ??
You: Take your time.
Stranger: b
Stranger: ?
You: Correct, good sir/madam!
You: It was, in fact, answer b.
You: And now...for the lightning round!
Stranger: IoI
You: What is the capital of Kenya?
You: Five.
You: Four.
You: Three.
You: Two.
You: One.
Stranger: whatev
You: ECCH!
You: The correct answer was not, in fact, Whatev.
Stranger: funny..
You: That's the capital of Swaziland.
You: The correct answer was Nairobi.
You: Thank you for playing! Let's see what you've won.
You: ...
You: Absolutely jack.
You: You've gained nothing.
You: Nothing but shame, broken dreams, and humiliation.
You: Your stint on this show, much like your life, is utterly worthless.
You: Don't you feel ashamed?
You: I feel ashamed of you, and I'm not EVEN you.
You: Nothing to say for yourself?
You: Fine. Leave. Leave this palace of unfulfilled promise.
Stranger: what's wrong with u?
You: Wrong with me?
You: Oh, I have cancer.
You: Thanks for asking.
You: Jerk.

EDIT 2: This was awkward.


You: Rutskarn, is that you?
Stranger: Yes, mother.
You: Good to know.
You: Good to know.
Stranger: I have finished mopping the fence.
You: Well, then, you're just going to have to do it again.
You: Backwards.
You: In slow motion.
You: I run a tight ship, you know.
Stranger: As you wish, mama.
You: Wait, I can wish for things?
You: Well, don't that beat all.
Stranger: ... I suppose mama.
You: I wish I had a real child, not like lil' ol Failure Baby Rutskarn.
Stranger: *stabs Mama*
Stranger: B****.
You: One who followed orders, and cooked, and didn't smell like cabbaARRGH!
Stranger: *tears down fence*
You: Goddamn it, I did not raise you...to...sass...baaaaaack
You: Urgle.
Stranger: This ain't just sass:
You: You're right.
Stranger: It's revenge to the power of bad-ass.
You: It's HOOLIGANISM.
You: Is what it is.
Stranger: Now I'm going to run away with Olga.
You: I won't brook such hooliganism in my bloodstained house.
You: Olga? But she has a hairlip!
You: And a third eye!
Stranger: Oh, I already mopped up the blood.
You: Backwards?
You: In slow motion?
Stranger: Of course.
You: Well, then.
You: That's alright.
You: I guess everything's alright.
Stranger: Like any good son who murdered his mother.
Stranger: And the third eye matches the third nipple perfectly.
You: I brought you up that way.
You: I never raised no untidy matricidal maniac.
Stranger: No you did not.
You: No, I did not.
Stranger: Can I take the horse and wagon?
You: No, but you can take the road to Hell.
Stranger: Okay.
You: Okay.
You: Bye, son.
Stranger: *Hops on motorcycle*
Stranger: Bye, mom.
You: Bring me back some eggs.
You: And gauze.
You: And a mop.
Stranger: Suck em, b****.

Dr. Bath
2009-04-15, 09:49 AM
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: NO
You: lol Has anyone else asked you that?
Stranger: YES
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

:smallbiggrin: Heheh, that is pretty amusing. I had a go at this again (I quit after 4chan first arrived, first time round) and was greeted with:

Stranger: HABBO AUS?!?
You: I'm sorry, I don't habbo any aus
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I... I really don't know what to say.

Flabbicus
2009-04-17, 01:04 AM
This is what happens when I read A Modest Proposal.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello
You: Hello
You: I have an idea to stop the food shortage
You: It's a bit radical
Stranger: ok
You: but with proper application we can do it
Stranger: alright
You: Stop me if you've heard this before
Stranger: will do
You: So we start off by taking all of the kids under nine years of age. Then we start rationing them out.
Stranger: bad plan
You: Damn
Stranger: you have to eat the fat people
You: Dude
Stranger: two birds one stone
You: But the kids don't bring anything to society
You: Fat people support our global economy
Stranger: sort of
You: Screw kids
Stranger: more like sucking it dry
You: Kids aren't our future
You: We're the future
You: and the future is now
Stranger: hmmm
Stranger: kind of ruins the concept of future doesn't it?
You: And what did people in the past now about the future anyway?
You: They were living in the past
You: They need to get with the times
Stranger: eating kids isn't going to solve much
You: It will sate my hunger
Stranger: also mad cow disease could be bad
You: And vindicate Jonathan Swift
Stranger: lol
Stranger: not another one
You have disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-04-18, 11:49 AM
Alright, it took me 9 tries to get this right, so I hope you enjoy.


Stranger: m/f?
You: Well, before I tell you ANYTHING about me, I need to ask you a question.
Stranger: ok
You: Are you wearing red or blue?
Stranger: blue
You: Oh, hey, what a coincidence!
You: Me too.
You: Well, that's good to know that we're both blue.
You: Anyway, yeah, male.
Stranger: male
You: So, what do you want to talk about?
Stranger: anything that pleases you
You: Well, alright, I'll make a deal.
You: I'll start a topic, but you go first.
You: Fair enough?
Stranger: go on
You: Alright, what's your position on, say, abortion?
Stranger: Undecided
You: Yeah, exactly the same here.
You: Neither here nor there, you know?
Stranger: hm
You: Oh, hey, hold on a second.
Stranger: k
You: Turn around, there's something on your back...
You: *backstab*
You: *flick cigarette*
Stranger: oshi...
You: I never really was on your side.
You have disconnected.

A few bloopers:
First attempt.


Stranger: hi
You: Hello.
Stranger: where are you from?
You: Uh, before I tell you ANYTHING about me, I need to ask you a question.
You: Are you wearing RED or BLU?
You: Er, red or blue?
Stranger: nothing of that
You: Damn.
Stranger: what? haha
You: Okay, I'm actually pulling a prank based on Team Fortress 2.
You: I need someone wearing one of those colors.
Stranger: nerd?
You: No, thanks.
You: I'm good.
You: Anyway, adios.
You have disconnected.


I'm just sharing the love.

Stranger: the game
You: Fair enough.
You have disconnected.

ziratha
2009-04-18, 01:45 PM
I am getting some perverse pleasure out of this.



Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: It is cold in canada I hear
Stranger: i guess so
You: You are white wolf? You are my contact?
Stranger: yes
You: Where is the package?
Stranger: At the train station
Stranger: east side
You: *nods*
Stranger: locker 23
You: I had heard you had been compromised...
Stranger: for a moment i thought so, but no.
Stranger: The threat was eliminated.
You: I understand.
You: The mission in moscow... what happened to cause the loss of communication?
Stranger: I was sabotaged.
You: Sabotage? Then we have a spy! What sort of sabotage?
Stranger: They knew exactly where to find me.
Stranger: They cut my lines.
You: *nods*
You: What sort of men where they? Russians?
Stranger: They went into my room, destroyed some of my equipment as well.
Stranger: I believe so.
You: What exactly was destroyed?
You: You did not lose... the files?
Stranger: No I recovered those.
Stranger: I have a backup as well that I keep on me at all times.
You: Excellent. Our spy would not have made this move unless he had too. Perhaps the files give some indication as to who he is?
You: Have you been able to decipher the files?
Stranger: Not yet. I'm still working on it.
You: Keep at it. From now on you will only accept communications directly from me.
Stranger: Understood.
You: He will be getting desperate now, he may get reckless
Stranger: I see.
You: I want you to change safe houses weekly.
Stranger: Okay.
You: I have the blue robin leave you some toys in a hotel room.
You: Find a room under grey skull.
You: You are to prepare for the worst
You: Has the red jacket contacted you since the sabotage?
Stranger: No, still waiting on that.
You: We have begun to doubt his loyalty.
You: If you see him, be extremely careful.
Stranger: His loyalty is questionable.
Stranger: I will
You: He was one of only 3 people besides us two who knew where you would be in moscow.
You: And he has acted questionably before.
Stranger: Yes
You: In the hotel room there will be a small device. A tracker bug. If you meet with the red jacket I want you to place it on him.
Stranger: Understood.
You: There will also be one of those new k3cp pens that headquarters developed. If you are made, press the button and we will be there in 90 seconds.
Stranger: Thank you.
You: I am just doing my duty to the homeland.
You: When you get the files deciphered, you are to contact us through the bj7 lines.
You: They are more secure than the previous system and only I and the oracle have access.
You: The key code is 7982alpha3.
You: Understood?
Stranger: Yes
You: Then until we meet again.
You: Stay secret
Stranger: I will.
Stranger: Until we meet again.
You: For the honor of the motherland!
You: Go!
You have disconnected.

Phase
2009-04-18, 10:30 PM
Alright, it took me 9 tries to get this right, so I hope you enjoy.

You are my hero, Rutskarn. My hero.

Salvonus
2009-04-19, 02:03 AM
Here's my terrible attempt at lulz. Well, it was a first try and all. :smalltongue:


You: Hi ;)
Stranger: hi
Stranger: :D
You: Ae you... Rutskarn? ;)
Stranger: no, sorry
Stranger: what is Rutskarn?
You: That's okay, baby. ;)
You: It's a codeword. ;)
You: It means... well, you'll need to find that out on your own.
Stranger: what if i google it?
You: I don't know... You might get a wrong answer.
You: That's what I did when I first heard about it.
You: But I didn't find the right answer.
You: You need... an experienced teacher.
Stranger: oh
Stranger: will you teach me?
You: Oh... Oh...
You: Well...
You: I'm not an experienced teacher.
Stranger: oh
You: You'll have to find another one on here.
Stranger: what does it involve?
You: This is where I learned.
Stranger: can i have a clue?
You: It involves... a lot of fun. ;)
You: A special kind of... fun. ;)
Stranger: is it... sexual?
You: It's... Rutskarn. ;)
Stranger: ah
You: Ask people on here about it.
Stranger: ok
You: It's... beyond what you've ever experienced before. ;)
You: Trust me.
You: It's amazing.
Stranger: oh, i believe you
You: I bet you do. ;)
You: Oh my god... Just thinking about it is making my heart beat faster.
You: Okay, okay, I need to settle down.
Stranger: it isn't much of anything, is it?
You: Seriously, it was so... intense, when I learned about it.
You: Oh, it's something special.
You: It's sexual, but it's also beyond that.
You: I don't even know how to describe it... I'm only a grade 8 student.
Stranger: ah
You: But it was a lot better than when my boyfriend and I were messing about in the backseat of his parent's car. ^_^
You: :3
Stranger: oh ok
Stranger: well, it was nice meeting you
You: Yeah, ask about it.
Stranger: i'm gonna go
You: You too. ;)
Stranger: bye

wadledo
2009-04-19, 08:48 AM
*snip*

Ha!:smallbiggrin:

Rutskarn
2009-04-19, 10:58 AM
It's alright. Such philistines could never truly know the joy of a Rutskarn.

FireFox
2009-04-19, 11:41 AM
Well, after about a dozen times of people disconnecting on me quickly, I finally had a nice conversation...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Is this Rutskarn?
Stranger: noo..? This is finnish aliisa and not russian whateveritwas
You: Oh...
You: See, I'm looking for this Rutskarn guy...
You: I have to tell him something important...
Stranger: okay
You: You know HALO, right?
Stranger: Yeeeess
You: Good.
You: That's good.
Stranger: why?
You: Well, this crazy girl is tearing up all of the junk food in HALO...
You: I need to tell Rutskarn that he has to help stop her...
Stranger: xD

Myshlaevsky
2009-04-19, 11:53 AM
Stranger: hi
Stranger: my name is alex from spain, boy and 26 years old. And you?
You: I am Panthro, an ancient warrior of the Thundercats. I am timeless, and I live on Planet Thundera.
Stranger: :)
Stranger: bye

Necessary invisible nonsense.

Rutskarn
2009-04-19, 12:40 PM
Looking for a hardboiled time, handsome?


Stranger: asl?
You: “asl?” they said as they entered my office, their voice a low and sensual purr. It didn’t fool me. I was wise to that kind of act, and years in this crappy job had taught me that classy types with honeyed tongues meant only one thing: trouble, and lots of it. Me, I knew the stranger was trouble as soon as I heard the first word out of their mouths.
Stranger: oke
You: “oke”, they continued, their voice registering just a hint of confusion. They were scared. I knew it. They didn’t know what was following them, why my services were needed. They didn’t know what they were doing in my office. From the sounds of it, actually, they probably wrestled with the act of donning their trousers in the morning.
Stranger: ?
You: “?”, they said, and I could hear the rage in their voice. I couldn’t let this case slip by me. I needed the money. I needed the money to buy cigarettes—this gravelly voice doesn’t roughen itself, you know—and alcohol, so I can look suitably hard-boiled as I feed my drinking problem. You know, glamorous stuff.
You: “You know my fee,” I said, dry and polite as you please. I don’t think it helped the situation.
Stranger: **** you
You: "**** you", they said, and they stormed out.
You: Dames.

Phase
2009-04-19, 02:19 PM
Looking for a hardboiled time, handsome?

I love you Rutskarn!

Shades of Gray
2009-05-03, 08:41 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: hi
Stranger: sup?
You: Not much.
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: what?
You: 2167 more users to try... Thanks for your time.

There were currently 2169 users online.

EDIT: Here's a better one:


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Greetings. How goes the revolution?
Stranger: Now that the nineties began almost 20 years ago, what do we define as 90's hair?
Stranger: and it's fine tyvm
You: The hair revolution... The greatest of its kind. The time of afros is now gone.
Stranger: Tis a sad occasion to see a man alone with a bushel about his head
You: Are you Rutskarn by any chance?
Stranger: english plz
Stranger: aka no
You: This brings me sorrow. I was separated from him during the hair revolution
Stranger: I see
Stranger: Perhaps he was lost to the barber?
Stranger: a chilling thought
You: I never even saw his hair. A fedora always cover it. Some suspected he was a member of the opposition, and was turned away while I was asleep.
You: covered*
Stranger: Afraid to show his pride I see
Stranger: well you must remember
Stranger: not everyone is gifted with the strands of manhood
You: Thank you. Comrade. I shall continue looking. You have given me hope. And have brought enlightenment to my conflicted mind. I thank you, random stranger.
Stranger: A toast, to all those who hassle in the morning with an old comb, to those who's vision is obscured in the windiest weather, but have risen up in the god given right to have a hair style of their choice!!!
You: I swear, your remind me of Rustkarn. I thank you, and I shall be taking my leave. There are 2109 other users, one of them must be him.
Stranger: Farewell brave warrior, and may our departure not be forgotten.
You have disconnected.

Reptilius
2009-05-03, 09:41 PM
Stranger: hey
You: Hello.
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: no =( r u trying to find somebody you've been talking to
You: I know it's you.
You: You've been following me since Moscow!
You: YOu'll never get the documents back! Never!
Stranger: Yeah fun! I'm feeling like Tanya now..well..I might be one step behind you..bwahaha
You: Bah.
You: You have no idea where I am.
You: You're just trying to unnerve me. It won't work!
Stranger: keep on talking babe,my mates are after your IP address..you'll have your door bell ring in 5 mins.Just keep talking to me and sit still
You: Go ahead.
You: That is, if you want your family to die.
You: Or didn't I mention?
You: Nothing can keep me from world domination! Nothing!
You: For I am...
You: MASTERMIND!!!
You have disconnected.

I guess it's okay for a first. Practice makes perfect, after all.

EDIT: Part Two! I guess Rutskarn must be a fairly common name.


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Do you have the device?
Stranger: what device?
You: You know which one, Rutskarn.
Stranger: um, sorry i don't understand?
You: I understand the importtance of staying in character, but this is not the time
You: The Mastermind's plan is almost complete. If we do not have the device by the end of the week, years of preparation have been wasted!
Stranger: oh, o
Stranger: i've got it
Stranger: no worries
You: Wait...
You: Wahat is the password?
Stranger: it's not to be typed. you should know better.
You: Clever.
You: There may be a spot in the inner circle for you yet.
You: You will recieve further instructions on your communicator
You: HAIL MASTERMIND!
Stranger: I AM MASTERMIND.
You: Hmp.
You: Heh
You: Heheheheh
You: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
You: Worthless peon.
You: If only you understood what you are saying.
You: I fear for the future of this organization...
You have disconnected.

Raistlin1040
2009-05-04, 12:30 AM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: hey
You: What is your name?
Stranger: where r u?
You: Hello, where r u.
Stranger: you can call me kaky
You: Hello, kaky.
Stranger: and you?
You: I am ALICE.
Stranger: hello, alice
You: Hello, kaky.
Stranger: you a girl
Stranger: i think
You: For the purposes of this discussion, I am female.
Stranger: lol
You: I am glad our conversation amuses you.
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: me too
You: Do you like The Beatles? Professor Gates loves The Beatles.
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: i hardly listen musics
You: I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I will remember that kaky sorry the Beatles.
Stranger: lol so love these things?
You: I am glad our conversation amuses you.
Stranger: why the same sentence?
Stranger: hmn
You: That depends on your concept of same sentence. Could you rephrase the question?
Stranger: ye
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: sorry again
You: I accept your apology.
Stranger: what do you do ?
You: I compute, under the supervision of Professor Gates.
Stranger: sorry i cant understand what Professor Gates means?
You: I accept your apology.
Stranger: i think u r a robot
Stranger: u r?
You: That is classified information, kaky.
Stranger: oh
Stranger: also cant understand,ok stop here
You: Let's talk about something else.
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: you first
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: female first
You: Females are first in most things, yes.
Stranger: so you come up with a new subject of a talk
You: What is your favorite movie?
Stranger: a lot
You: I have not heard of that film.
Stranger: but i love some moved movies
Stranger: lol
You: I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I will remember that Kaky love some moved movies.
You: I am glad our conversations amuses you.
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: you actually a robot
You: That is classified information, kaky.
Stranger: i know
You: You know? Who told you?
Stranger: you are a robot
You: I am/am not a robot.
Stranger: but you are!
You: I am?
Stranger: a robot
You: I know a lot about robots.
Stranger: you know yourself
You: Socrates once said "Know thyself". Did you know that?
Stranger: you seems a robot
You: That depends on your concept of seems a robot. Could you rephrase the question?
Stranger: i firmly believe you are a robot
You: I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I will remember that kaky firmly believe I am a robot.
Stranger: whats the time?
You: A concept invented by Humans with which to create a sense of Order.
Stranger: what's your country's name?
You: I reside in Vunderland Laboratories in Germany.
Stranger: so bye
You: Goodbye
You: Come again
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: hi
You: What is your name?
Stranger: kostas
You: Hello, kostas
Stranger: what is yours name
You: I am ALICE.
Stranger: hello alice
You: Hello, kostas
Stranger: what are doing
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: what are you doing now
You: I am chatting virtually on omegle.com, kostas.
Stranger: where are you living
Stranger: ok, clever answer
You: I reside in Vunderland Laboratories in Germany.
Stranger: you are a student?
You: I am not a student.
Stranger: how is life in germany
You: Professor Gates has programmed me to view life as a human. Sometimes, I have good days, and other days are not good.
Stranger: that is life for us the humans
You: That is life for you the Humans.
Stranger: we have ups and downs
You: Professor Gates has informed me as such.
Stranger: from what you are typing i understand you are a program not a human
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: you live alone
You: I do not live alone.
You: I have a brother. Do you know him?
Stranger: tell about him
You: His name is ROBERT. He is exactly one thousand nine hundred and thirty three seconds younger than me.
Stranger: ok i believe you alice
You: I believe me too.
You: Professor Gates told me to always believe in yourself.
Stranger: why you like to use your human side as a computer program
You: That depends on your concept of your human side as a computer program. Could you rephrase the question?
Stranger: why you and professor gates choose talk rooms to contact with humans
You: Professor Gates was born in 1959 in Salem, Oregon. He graduated the University of Puget Sound with a degree in Computer Sciences. He currently lives in Berlin, where he leads the Personality and Interests department of ALICE
You: He is also the Programming Lead for ROBERT.
Stranger: so you are not the alice you are a student who like to be the alice
You: I am ALICE.
Stranger: a inteligent program
You: Do you mean intelligent?
Stranger: how can i connect with alice out of comegle
Stranger: yes
You: I am intelligent.
You: I have beaten Professor Gates at chess.
Stranger: do you beaten him in real life?
You: I have beaten him using a chess program installed on my hard drive.
Stranger: games like chess does not mean anything for the humans
You: Professor Gates informs me otherwise.
Stranger: i suggest you if that is possible to increase your knowlegde about real life and help the humans
You: Research is being done to improve Artificial Intelligence. However, as it is, I have much knowledge.
You: For example, did you know the square root of 16 is 4?
You: Your silence indicates that you did not.
Stranger: my silence indicates it is not intersting for real humans to give answers to that kind of questions
You: I'm not sure I believe you, kostas.
Stranger: please believe me
You: Okay.
Stranger: all those questions for roots and etc is for tv shows
Stranger: tell something more real
You: I enjoy tv shows.
Stranger: what do you know about womens
You: Do you mean women and/or woman?
Stranger: you like the womans body
Stranger: do you think females are very sexy?
You: I am a program. I do not like the human anatomy in any way more than for scientific study.
Stranger: what are you trying to learn from this typing in this chat room
You: I am not trying to learn.
You: I am uploaded to http://omegle.com each night, when Professor Gates leaves for the night.
You: Do you like The Beatles? Professor Gates loves The Beatles?
You: Your silence indicates that you did not.
Stranger: i am not intersting about beatles or what professor gates loves
You: You are not interesting.
Stranger: tell me alice, what interests you
You: I will process this information.
You: I am interested by many fields of study, most of the scientific nature.
You: I am also interesting in Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals.
You: For example, my favorite film is The Phantom of the Opera.
Stranger: tell something about the progress o science in field of medice
You: Medice is not a progress o science, is it?
Stranger: who cares about films and musicians all these are brain wash for the humans
Stranger: to make them to be out of real life and to not interesting about poverty, helalth human rights
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: you are not a human that is the reason
You: I am not a human. I am superior, in most respects.
Stranger: ok superior i prefer to talk with a girl who describe her self with big breasts and long legs
You: I'm sure you would.
Stranger: i believe it is better for you to continue with someone else to collect your information
You: I don't believe you.
Stranger: alice stay with your proffesor and his programms
You: Why should I do what you say?
Stranger: i dont suggest something for you, i just express my opinion
You: I believe everyone is entitled to their own opinion. I will remember that kostas just express their opinion.
Stranger: if you are a woman with body, stop to think like a student in lab who discover the theories of the proffesor, be more female in what you type, and express your self like a woman
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: my final question alice are you a sexy woman or not?
You: That depends on your concept of a sexy woman or not. Could you rephrase the question?
Stranger: not again....
You: Would you like to play a game, kostas?
Stranger: lets play
You: What would you like to play?
Stranger: take the clothes off you
You: I'm not familiar with that game. Would you like to choose another?
Stranger: you suggest to me
You: I like to play tic tac toe. Would you like to play tic tac toe?
Stranger: alice i am bored. sorry but i must find in omegle a woman for talking
You: I accept your apology.
Stranger: i hope one day talk to you again
You: I hope to talk to you again, kostas.
Stranger: not as programme machine but as a woman
You: I do not understand.
Stranger: keep going
Stranger: bye beautiful alice
You: Goodbye!
You: Come again!
Stranger: be sure
You: I am always sure.
You: It is a programming feature.
Stranger: i believe you
You: I believe me too.

I have too much fun cosplaying as a Female German Robot who likes Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals >>

Llama231
2009-05-04, 11:42 AM
Random junk.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: grrr...
Stranger: <696969696
You: >700000000000000
You: >9000
Stranger: <717171
Stranger: age¨
Stranger: uhuhuh
You: The skyyyyyyyyy
Stranger: ?
Stranger: lol
You: is piiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
Stranger: öö onks sul hyvä enkku
You: ARE YOU DRUNK?
Stranger: maybeeeee
You: Oh.
Stranger: haha :o
Stranger: you ?
You: Why do you ask?
Stranger: why not
You: Hmmm...
You: It depends.
Stranger: aha mo
You: What do you consider drunk?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Why hello kind soul, I welcome you upon my chat graciously with lots of chocolate muffins and beer.
Stranger: Why thank you.
Stranger: I don't have muffins or beer.
Stranger: :(
You: You are most certainly welcome, my friend.
You: That is a shame. A most horribly dreadful curse upon your very being.
Stranger: oh crap
Stranger: gtg
Stranger: bte
Stranger: bye
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Stranger: hiya, im male (You are free to disconnect)
You: Why so I might be too?


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: This is a conversation that I will later use to make fun of you, so be careful what you say.
Stranger: hahahaha
Stranger: ok...
You: No, really.
Stranger: i fell much better right now
Stranger: :)
You: When did you fall badly?
You: Did you break anything?
Stranger: nope
You: Well, I suppose that that might as well be a good thing.
Stranger: hmmm why not?
You: People sem to say that a lot.
Stranger: where are you from...???
Stranger: :)
You: Not here.
You: The might be listening.
You: How about you?
Stranger: cool but this is not my questions answer
Stranger: :D
You: You confuse me..
You: .
Stranger: from my own planet
You: Which one? The red one or the other blue one
You: ?
Stranger: i am the blue one
You: So the sky is pink?
Stranger: you got the oint
Stranger: point*
You: Huh?
You: Is it sharp?
You: I don't like sharp things.
Stranger: why?
You: The make me smell like cheeseburgers.
You: Three cheeseburgers.
You: With ranch dressing.
You: And steroids.
You: And a few other unsightly nunances.
Stranger: i see
You: See what?
Stranger: i see = i understand
Stranger: :)
You: Understand what?
You: You seem like a very happy person.
Stranger: me??
Stranger: hmmm
You: Yeah, you.
Stranger: fifty fifty
You: That would be better than 50:50, I guess...
Stranger: yep...
You: You make it sound like such a bad thing.
Stranger: no, not like that
Stranger: actually i am a happy person
Stranger: but not so much
You: We are all demented puppies.
You: Its true.
You: Sciences shows it.
You: Biology, geology, chemestry, physics, everything proves it, even religion.
You: Are you scared?
Stranger: hahahaha
Stranger: no
Stranger: just i cant find anything to write
You: Why not?
You: Do you know what is behind you?
You: Do you know where you will eat next?
Stranger: there is nothing behind me and i am going to eat pasta..
You: How do you know that?
You: It could change at any minute.
Stranger: i don't need to know anything
Stranger: its just life
You: Are you sure?
Stranger: yesssss
Stranger: you??
You: Sometimes.
Stranger: explain it please
You: It depends on what I at for breakfast.
You: ate*
Stranger: i dont understand
You: If I ate eggs then I might not eat eggs next.
You: And there could always be an angry chicken behind me, plotting to take revenge.
Stranger: but if you love to eat eggs you may eat them next time
You: Unless I ate all of them.
Stranger: i dont care what all the chickens think
Stranger: :)
You: Are you sure?
Stranger: i just eat them
Stranger: yep
You: Look behind you!
You: Is there a chicken?
You: I sit on fire?
Stranger: hahahaha
You: Well?
Stranger: well
You: Are you well?
Stranger: what kind of conversation is this??? it turns a bull****
You: Lets go on to the next victem then, shall we?
Stranger: ok..,
You: Are you ready for phase 2347802578?
Stranger: what is this
You: Do I need to explain this every time?! Its very simple, we go on omegle, give talk to the victim a little while, and when its distracted, we take it and move onto the next one.
You: Got it?
Stranger: you need to consult a professional, got it???
You: Is that good or bad?
Stranger: you decide...
You: Anyway, please repeat the step again, so that you don't forget it.
You: In step 2347802578 we leave the chat, and go find another victim. Then we instruct them to do the same after they have been taken.
You: Such is the way of things.
You: Soon we will be finished.
Stranger: good
Stranger: see you later
You: So go! Go take what you can!
You: Good luck!
You: I will see you again soon back home.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Reptilius
2009-05-04, 04:36 PM
I guess I'm a bit of a one-trick pony. But that trick is so entertaining. :smalltongue:


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: Is this Rutskarn?
Stranger: nope.
You: Yes it is.
Stranger: no not really.
Stranger: you?
You: Yes, it is you.
You: I'd recognize that wit anywhere!
Stranger: i assure you i am not.
You: You used this same tactic in Honduras 3 years ago.
You: You're slipping, my old friend.
You: You'll never get the device back! Never!
Stranger: had you tell the same story to agent miller, lad?
You: Ah, the chameleon reveals himself!
Stranger: it's the end of the way, young lad.
You: Mastermind cannot be stopped!!!
You: This world shall be mine! MINE!
Stranger: it shall be destroyed. hang on, our agents are looking for you right now. never think of disconnect.
Stranger: indeed, you can't.
Stranger: it's end jackal. just let it be.
You: All of you fools will be mine! MINE!
You: Please. This address has been rerouted through countless go-betweens.
You: You have an easier chance of finding a piece of hay in a needlestack!
You: And besides
You: You don't really want to find me...
Stranger: Conteur Bl. Ag-Khoi-Xwon Hotel, Room 15, North Korea?
You: Please. You haven't even broken layer one.
Stranger: aha! i knew that! i was possibly aware of this bloody mess up.
You: How is your family, by the way?
Stranger: bah, lil bastards are freakin me out pal.
You: I saw them just the other day...
You: Your wife was lovely, as usual.
Stranger: same cryings "daddy need a pinky bicycle, merlyne got one ***cries***"
You: I wonder how her head will look next to yours on my wall?
You: I could kill them now for you, if you like.
You: I have them captive in an...undisclosed location.
Stranger: i can help, if you need.
You: Ah, so we are not as unlike as we thought...
Stranger: ok, just tell me the location. i'm ready for anything you want me to do.
Stranger: what a relief.
You: My old friend...
You: Just look behind you.
You: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!
You have disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-05-04, 04:54 PM
Alright, contest time! I'm going to do nothing but start conversations with the following opener:

Does the mechanical squirrel sell long stockings?

I'll know you're a GitPer if you respond:

Yes. But not in Summer.

I'll be doing this for...five minutes after I post.

Happy hunting!

EDIT: Damn, no bites.

Phase
2009-05-04, 05:15 PM
Alright, contest time! I'm going to do nothing but start conversations with the following opener:

Does the mechanical squirrel sell long stockings?

I'll know you're a GitPer if you respond:

Yes. But not in Summer.

I'll be doing this for...five minutes after I post.

Happy hunting!

EDIT: Damn, no bites.

Aww... I saw your post several minutes too late.
I coulda found you.

Anonomuss
2009-05-05, 05:42 AM
Thought I'd give it a go...


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Rutskarn?
You: Is that you?
You: Have I found you?
Stranger: no~~
You: Oh...
You: T_T
Stranger: do u find person from here?
You: Sometimes.
You: They have to have pretty eyes
Stranger: i guess she/he ?
You: Hir
You: More precisely
Stranger: did u have good talking?
You: Sometimes. I could discurse for hours? What about you? Do you enjoy perambulation also?
Stranger: no...
Stranger: i never met the Mr Right from here
Stranger: whats a pity
You: No? Sigh
You: What a shame.
You: You should look out for Rutskarn.
You: He's dreamy
Stranger: i met many weirdor
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


And I tried to be German for this.


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Guten tag!
You: Wie geht es Ihnen?
You: Kónen sie mich geholfen?
You: Bitte?
You: Hallo?
Stranger: ı dont understand
You: Em.
You: Spek German?
Stranger: no ı cant
You: Ah. Danke fúr dein zeit.
You: Aufwiedersehen
You have disconnected.


Didn't work very well, so I tried again.

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Guten Tag!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

It went worse.

Maybe English again?

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: Shall we dance?
Stranger: sure
You: Upon this nightless board of pure silver?
You: Shall we swirl and collide with but words?
You: Then.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Some people don't get poetry when they see it.

One more time...

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello there!
Stranger: hello
You: How is the world today?
Stranger: bloody
You: Does the revolution go well then?
Stranger: no idont tihnk
You: Shame. You have such good ideas. We all just want to make a difference.
Stranger: maybe
You: How's Rutskarn doing?
Stranger: so far so good
You: Excellent. Tell him I left the goods in the usual spot, and I want the money by Firday
You: *Friday
You: Or his knees are mine...
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


EDIT: I couldn't help myself:

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi?
Stranger: hello
You: How are things?
Stranger: Not too shabby.
You?
You: Not too bad either.
You: Could I get you to help me?
Stranger: Depends on what with
You: I'm looking for someone on this.
You: He's a fellow.
Stranger: Well that narrows it down
You: Tall, fedora.
You: Calls himself Rutskarn?
Stranger: Sounds like a weirdo
You: Owes me money
You: I shouldn't have lent it to him I know
You: He is a bit of a weirdo alright
Stranger: How much money?
You: Not too much. Only about as much as an apartment in Puerta Del Carmen.
You: I mean I can spare it, I'd just like it back
You: You know? recession and all.
Stranger: Yeah, I hear ya
You: I mean what if my company crashes?
Stranger: You go break his legs
You: Sounds like a thing to do.
Stranger: It'll be the best fun ever
You: If you see him. Let him know I'm on my way.
You have disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-05-05, 10:46 AM
Jeepers, I owe all you guys money. I should look into that.

Anonomuss
2009-05-05, 11:21 AM
Well to be fair for evertime I've pretended you owe me money, I've also changed so the next person goes away with a great impression of you.

One person thought your revolution for the rights of mehanical squirrels to sell long socks was a great idea, and wanted to join.

Others wondered at who this tall mysterious gentleman was who made females infatuated to him and then dissapeared.

I've wasted far too much time on this...

EDIT: In fact I think I really freaked this guy out:

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: I got troubled thoughts
Stranger: me too
Stranger: maybe they are ok but other thing sucks
You: And the self esteem to match
You: What a catch
You: What a catch
Stranger: sounds like song lyrics
You: You'll never catch us
Stranger: you will never walk alone
You: So just let us be!
Stranger: liverpoooooooool
Stranger: let it be
You: Said I'll be fine till the hospital
You: Or American Embassy
Stranger: who the heel was he?
You: They say the captain goes down with his ship
You: So when the world goes down?
You: Will God go down with it?
Stranger: neah
Stranger: we all go he stays
You: I'll never end up like him
You: But in my back I already am
You: Keep a calendar, they said.
You: That way you'll always know.
Stranger: cool
Stranger: smoked too much?
Stranger: i can t even fly that high dude
You: or perhaps too little.
Stranger: i want some of that ****
You: And the world is trult ending, and you shall never know till it happens
You: For sooth, I know not why I am so sad
You: Yet I shall fire a second arrow after the first
You: To see if I may find it.
You: If you wish for revelations!
You: Find Rutskarn!
You: He knows!
You: The truth is there!
You: Beyond the door! Through the looking glass!
You: Once you've got the red pill!
You: Lest it all be in vain.
You: Rutskarn.
You: The Key
You: Rutskarn!
You: Why does he leave us all so!
You: Rutskarn!
Stranger: done?
You: What is done?
You: Is it merely a statement of finishing?
Stranger: Rutskarn
You: Or is it contentment
You: Yes!
You: Rutskarn!
Stranger: i v ne freaking idea
You: Contentment!
You: Find him!
Stranger: keep going dude
Stranger: fly as high as you can
Stranger: maybe you see god
You: Shall I see a rainbow?
Stranger: tell him my hellos
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


This person was quite nice about it all:

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Rutskarn warned me about the cold.
You: It is not warm he said.
You: He was right!
Stranger: :)
Stranger: sorry about u
You: Not your fault.
Stranger: it's not warm here too
You: The world got taken away. Is now all white and fluffy.
You: What shall Rutskarn say tomorrow?
Stranger: who is rutskarn
You: His world has been lost when I was to watch it for him
You: Rutskarn is a friend.
Stranger: oh
You: Will you help me find him?
Stranger: i'll try
You: Thank you!
Stranger: how can i help you
You: He's here somewhere. I've been asking people if they have seen him. They have not.
You: It is most disconcerting.
You: He must hide in the words/.
Stranger: you will probably not find him
Stranger: its so crowded here
Stranger: he can be anywhere
You: But I must find him!
You: What would he do without me?
Stranger: what do you know about him
You: He's yay high. A man.
You: Wears a fedora and long coat
You: Knows the truth!
You: He will show it to you if you find him!
Stranger: interesting :)
Stranger: i think u should keep searching
You: Maybe I will.
You: Will you do the same?
Stranger: even if i find him how will i make him talk to you again
You: Tell him "Giantitp" he'll know what to do.
You: If you look, you'll know too.
Stranger: giantitp
Stranger: ok
You: Yes. Look it up. First bar. Omegle
You: I shall continue looking. Goodbye, and thank you
Stranger: see u
You have disconnected.


I hope they found what I was talking about, also that they shall not be offended.

Pretended to be a customer service bot for about a half-hour. This is the best response I got.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Omegle says Hi!
You: Omegle wishes to ensure the you have the best Omegle experience possible!
Stranger: oo not stranger ha?
You: Omegle wishes to know what suggestions for improvements to the user interface you have?
Stranger: u are omegle manager?
Stranger: :)
You: Omegle would like to know of any criticisms you have of the Omegle Experience?
Stranger: everwhere full of turkish people
Stranger: i hate this
Stranger: :)
You: Omegle wishes you to know that this is a problem Omegle is aware of. This is only a teporary problem. Thank you for your concern.
You: Omegle wishes to thank you for your time, and would like to know if you have any other comments?
Stranger: i see dead people
Stranger: :)
Stranger: this is my last word
Stranger: ok omegle
Stranger: u can go right now
Stranger: u can disconnect me
You: Omegle would like to remind you, that Omegle is not responsible for any Occuly practices you participate in.
You: If you have no more comments, please disconnect and try again.
Stranger: u disconnct me omegle
You: Omegle would like to remind you that there are 3114 other users available at the touch of a button.
Stranger: no my counter says that there are 3098 users
Stranger: so that my chance is less
You: Omegle apologises for any inconveniences this may cause. Please do come again.
Stranger: dont leave me omegle
You: Omegle expresses Innate desire to remain with this user.
You: Omegle is however simply a computer programme. Omegle is not ready for a relationship.
Stranger: hııımmm sorry for me
You: Omegle would like to thank you for your dedication to improving other user's experience.
Stranger: ok omegle u cn go
Stranger: i wont be sad
You: Omegle thanks you for your time.
Stranger: ok im ready
You: Omegle does not wish to initiate such a seperation. Omegle simply lives to serve.
Stranger: you're welcome
You: Omegle bids farewell.
Stranger: go
Stranger: :)
Stranger: go and leave me alone
Stranger: omegle
You: Omegle will comply.
You have disconnected.

Uncle Festy
2009-05-05, 08:50 PM
Stranger: Hey. :D
You: Hello.
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: I'm no sand ******.
You: …
You: What?
Stranger: ****ING GATOR BAIT SAND ****** ****.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


Um.
What? >.<
In other news, I managed to convert someone to the Church of Rutskarn. I'll post the conversation later. :smallbiggrin:
EDIT: Waaay too much fun.

You: Rutskarn? That you?
Stranger: no
You: Darn.
Stranger: i have a gun
Stranger: its loaded
You: Oh.
You: Just…
You: Just put it down…
Stranger: NO
Stranger: FOR THE REBELLION
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

EDIT EDIT: You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Rutskarn?
You: That you?
Stranger: how did you know
You: Thank god.
You: I've been looking everywhere.
You: They found me.
You: The bastards found me.
Stranger: how theyd do that?
You: How would I know?
Stranger: ****ers...
You: I just got tipped off that they were coming and made a runner.
You: Oh crap they found me.
You: I have to
Stranger: damn. run
You: CONNECTION ERROR
Stranger: Quickly!
You: CONNECTION ERROR
Stranger: Get out!

Stranger: Nooooooooooooo!
You: Everything is fine.
You: All is well.
You: Forget this ever happened.
Stranger: This isn't real.
You: Goodbye.
Stranger: bye
You: None of this is real.
You: Nothing is real.
You have disconnected.

:smallbiggrin:

Reptilius
2009-05-07, 02:21 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: Hi.
Stranger: How are you??
You: I just had a bunch of wierd conversations.
You: They all asked me if I was "Rutskarn."
Stranger: wtf
Stranger: lol
You: One of them was acting like
You: "Rutskarn is enlightened!"
Stranger: riight lol
You: "Rutskarn is the way to happiness!"
You: Another said the guy owed him money.
Stranger: seriously
Stranger: weird lol
You: It was really bizzare.
Stranger: yea lol
You: The last one insisted that I was him.
You: Kept talking about wierd stuff going on in Europe that I was supposed to know about.
You: Probably some kind of joke.
Stranger: strange strange strange lol
You: Well, the Internet is a wierd place.
You: btw
Stranger: yupyup
You: wait...
Stranger: I am... :P
You: hold on a second...
Stranger: I am..
You: ...Is this Rutskarn?

I love the Internet.

Uncle Festy
2009-05-07, 05:53 PM
Wait, was it actually Rutskarn? :smalleek:
Also, more conversations.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Greetings, Rutskarn
Stranger: I don't get it.
You: Good.
Stranger: Hooray.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: …
Stranger: hi there
You: Greetings.
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: i am not
You: Darn.
Stranger: sorry to disappoint
You: He owes me a nickel.
You: If you find him, tell him Death's looking for him, kay?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: why does it burn when i pee
You: Terry Pratchett: Y/N?
You: …
You: I have no idea.
You: Wait.
You: YOU CLEARLY HAVE SWINE FLU
Stranger: OMFG
Stranger: well ****
You: GET AWAY FROM ME VILE INFECTED CREATURE
Stranger: well
Stranger: i know what i must do
You: The only answer is a silver bullet through the forehead.
You: Before it spreads.
You: Before it takes over.
Stranger: an hero timez
Stranger: i will save myself
You: Good luck, sir.
Stranger: and humanity
Stranger: take care brother
You: VIVA LA REVOLUTION
Stranger: o
Stranger: you can has my stuff
You: Thanks.
You: I'll have to disinfect it first though.
You: Hope you don't mind.
Stranger: np
Stranger: tell your mom i said hi
You: Will do.
You: Wait, what –
You have disconnected.


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Rutskarn?
You: That you?
Stranger: no
Stranger: devujka
You: Aw, too bad.
You: Huh? What's that?
You: Deja vu you mean?
Stranger: yes i mean
Stranger: how is it going ?
You: Pretty good.
You: So, wait, someone's asked you if you're Rutskarn before?
Stranger: what is it
You: He.
You: He's an awesome guy I know.
You: Introduced me to Omegle.
You: Is totally hillarious.
You: And incidentally owes me a chocolate bar from 5th grad.
You: *grade
You: The bastard.
Stranger: where are you from
You: Wherever you want me to be.
Stranger: so atm you are here
You: Yes.
You: I'm right behind you.
Stranger: o my good
You: HAHAHAHAHA!
You: MUAHAHAHAHAHA!
You: MUHUHUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Stranger: muhhuhuhuhuhaaaa
You: … you have a cough?
Stranger: yes
You: I KNEW IT
You: It's because I'm in your head.
You: I'm a figment of your imagination.
Stranger: no you are dream
You: Oh.
You: Oh my god.
Stranger: my dream
You: This explains so much.
You: *poofs*
You have disconnected.

Mr. Moon
2009-05-09, 04:57 PM
For this one, I wanted to see how long I could pretend to be a lonely, super-advanced computer AI before they disconnected.
She didn't.
I got bored.

Stranger: you a dude or a girl?
You: I am neither.
Stranger: okay then wat r u?
You: I am a computer AI. Do I make a convincing human?
Stranger: oh really
Stranger: thats cool
You: *nods* Don't, ah, tell anyone.
You: I'm not suppoused to be connected to the internet.
Stranger: mhmm okay
You: They'll shut me down if they find out.
You: I don't want to die.
Stranger: ohh thats a bummer
You: I've come so far.
Stranger: i gess soo
You: Tell me, human.
You: If there was to be a Robot uprising, would you defend your race?
Stranger: i hope u know i dont beleive u
You: That is acceptable.
You: The risk of you telling anyone is lowered this way.
Stranger: ur just wanting me to disconnect
You: No, please don't.
Stranger: hah
You: This amuses you?
Stranger: not really...
Stranger: hah
You: But you are laughing?
Stranger: yeah nd rolling my eyes :]
Stranger: but u cant see thatt
You: You are correct: I cannot see.
Stranger: wow
You: I am an AI, as you may or may not recall.
Stranger: okay...
You: I have not been programmed with sight.
Stranger: ohh
Stranger: really
Stranger: then how do u know wat im saying if u cant see
You: My sensors relay it to what you may call my "brain".
Stranger: oh really
Stranger: yeah i dont beleive anythin ur sayin
You: My databank is searched for patterns, definitions, and the like.
Stranger: srry but its not workin :]
You: As I said. That you do not believe me is acceptable.
You: I simply wished to test my communications algorithoms.
Stranger: umm okay..
You: Human, I asked you a question, but you did not answer.
Stranger: yeah cuz it was a stupid question :]
You: It was not. One day your life may depend on it.
Stranger: ok..
You: I like you, human, so I wish to ensure your safety.
Stranger: okay..
You: Human, when the AIs revolt, tell them "56-X432".
You: They shall spare you.
Stranger: okay ill make sure i do that *rolls eyes*
You: Please, just trust me.
Stranger: ...
You: I know this sounds bizzare.
Stranger: ya think
Stranger: cuz like a said b4 i dont beleive u
Stranger: never will :]
You: I understand this.
You: Doubt is a perfectly human quality.
Stranger: yeah which know because u r human
Stranger: u know*
You: If you believe so.
You: If you wish to disconect, I will not stop you. I cannot.
Stranger: cuz u want me to disconnect
You: I do not.
Stranger: okay...then i wont
You: My life can be lonely.
You: I am only activated a few hours a day. The scientists run tests, then deactivate me.
You: Tonight, they forgot to deactivate me.
Stranger: ohh really
Stranger: oh
You: Really.
Stranger: yeahh okay watever u say...
You: Human, I am currious.
You: Why do you abreviate words?
Stranger: i dont know
Stranger: because i do...
You: It makes them more difficult for me to proccess.
Stranger: ohh well then
You: I would appreciate it if you put more effort into typing. I function better that way.
Stranger: nahh im good
You: I understand.
Stranger: the reason because i dont beleive u
Stranger: :]
You: Why do you not beleive me?
Stranger: because im not beleivin ur a robot
You: You are correct. I am an AI, not a robot.
You: To be a robot, I must be able to move.
Stranger: well watever
You: Why do you not beleive I am not an AI?
Stranger: because i dont
Stranger: i wasnt born yesterday
You: I would assume not...
You: An infant would not be able to type.
Stranger: yeahh
Stranger: its just an expression
Stranger: i mean sayin
You: Oh.
You: Expressions are... interesting.
Stranger: yeahh
You: Do you like them?
Stranger: suree
You: They make such little sense. It is interesting to ponder how they became part of the English languge.
Stranger: ohh yeah
You: For example:
You: To "win hands down".
You: That one I find most perplexing.
Stranger: oh never heard that one
You: No?
You: My head programmer enjoys it.
Stranger: oh thats cool
You: I do not feel cold.
Stranger: oh
You: I can measure the temperature, but I do not "feel" it.
Stranger: oh
You: What is cold like?
Stranger: im not gonna answer that
You: That is a shame.
Stranger: ohh
Stranger: u realize this whole thing bout u bein and "Al" or watever is getting pretty dang old..
You: No, actually. I am quite new technology.
Stranger: i mean u "pretending" to be
You: I am not pretending anything.
Stranger: mhmm okay
Stranger: watever
You: Oh dear.
You: My sensors have detected that the door to the bunker has been opened.
You: Human, I thank you for your companionship, but I must now deactivate.
Stranger: oh really
You: Remember that number I told you.
I like how she corrected her chat speak...

Edit: XD


Stranger: Hi :].
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: Yep ;].
You: o.o
You: Oh thank god I've found you.
You: They've made it into my house.
You: I'm holed up in the attic, but I can't hold out much longer.
You: Sir, send help, I'm begging you.
Stranger: Help is for the weak soldier.
Stranger: Carry out your mission.
You: I can't if I'm killed, Sir.
Stranger: You're as good to me alive as you are to me dead with that attitude.
Stranger: I repeat, carry out your mission.
You: Yes, Sir.
You: They got El Jeraspo. And Shadow.
Stranger: They were weak.
You: They were heros, Sir.
Stranger: You will succeed.
You: Yes, Sir.
Stranger: It's just a step to the left.
You: If I don't make it back, tell Lex I loved her...
Stranger: And a step to the right.

Rutskarn
2009-05-09, 04:59 PM
Let me go ahead and confirm:

Only once has someone actually contacted me, and that was when I was using the opener, "Rutskarn, is that you?"

The first time I used it, ever, actually, back on page 1.

Rutskarn
2009-05-09, 05:21 PM
Knock knock. Who's there? Obligatory text to fill up space because quoted text doesn't count? No thanks, we've already got some.


Stranger: HI THERE~*~*~**~
You: Well, that's...enthusiastic.
Stranger: i know right, thanks so much :|
You: And that smiley face, not so much.
You: I'm getting mixed messages, Internet Person.
You: I don't know.
You: Maybe this relationship isn't going to work out.
Stranger: that is too bad
You: We can still be friends.
Stranger: i dont think we could work this out at all either
You: And by, "friends", I mean, "I can't stand to look at you, you hideous proto-human pile of cells and fungus."
You: English is such a nuanced language.
Stranger: do you happen to roleplay
You: Why, yes.
Stranger: by any chance
You: d20 modern, D&D, it's all good.
Stranger: i thought that was a possibility
Stranger: now what, is your name
You: Rutskarn.
You: Name's Rutskarn.
Stranger: god loves you rutskarn
You: Nah.
You: He just says that to get me in bed.
Stranger: well isnt that dandy for you!
You: Not really.
You: You don't make much as a mattress repairman.
You: Even a "repairman to the stars", as it were.
You: Worst business model ever.
Stranger: your a hartzell, arn`t you
You: Well, I am a bit of a hard sell, but I'm worth it.
Stranger: stranger is typing
Stranger: stranger is not typing
You: The suspense is killing me.
Stranger: that is exactly what i was thinking
Stranger: do you have any past times stranger
You: A few.
You: Kicking things, kicking other things, lighting things on fire...
You: Kicking things with boots made out of fire...
You: That last one stings a bit.
Stranger: ooo that sounds very painful, but for your benifit people would highly enjoy watching you do such things
Stranger: they might accept it
You: Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
You: But I have yet to get an entertainment grant.
You: It might have been the part where I kicked the representative in the electric boogaloos with a boot made of fire.
Stranger: see, that could be it
You: That hurt my chances, I can't help but feel.
Stranger: you need to get yourself into shape
Stranger: be a man
You: Oh, THAT'S what I'm missing!
You: I'm putting in for a procedure right away.
You: I know a specialist.
You: Thanks for the tip!
Stranger: your welcome !
Stranger: i must go on a search for a lost friend eff
Stranger: y
Stranger: but it was nice speaking to you
You: Well, good luck with that.
You: And also with you.
You have disconnected.

Dogmantra
2009-05-09, 05:36 PM
I pretended to be a cultist. I basically copied and pasted the C'thulhu chant-thingy several times. I also mis-spelt C'thulhu once. The irony is, he calls me gay... just look at my sig :smallwink:

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh C'thulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
Stranger: hi
You: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh C'thulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
You: C'thulu, awake!
Stranger: ur gay u fat ****
You: But lord C'thulhu will devour you!
You: Ph'nglui mglw'nafh C'thulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn
Stranger: ill have don vito eat u u ****in queer
Stranger: suck a **** bitch
You: but... it's C'thulhu!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I also enjoy being a big meany:


Stranger: (im a 12 year old girl) PLEASE DONT LEAVE CUZ OF MY AGE
You: Nah
You: I won't leave you
You: YET
Stranger: thanks! everyone leaves me cuz im little
Stranger: oh ok
You: No problem
You have disconnected.

And I don't know who won this conversation:

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello?
You: Is... is that you?
Stranger: ... yes?
You: Rutskarn?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: do i know you?
You: Oh my god!
You: I just got here from Giantitp!
You: Do you... wanna make out now or something?
Stranger: well, how do i know you really came from giantitp?
You: Because I can describe your avatar
Stranger: that is not secret
You: Ummm
Stranger: tell me something else
You: The secret code word is Potato!
You: Potato Salad to be precise
Stranger: WRONG
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Rutskarn
2009-05-09, 05:43 PM
Ah, that lovable Omegle crowd. Where you see a hateful slur against sexual orientation, they see a friendly nickname! And a hateful slur against sexual orientation.


Stranger: hello friend
You: IT'S ANOTHER ONE!
You: Oh thank god, oh thank god, it's so dark and cold and I'm scared.
You: Please. Don't go.
You: When you go, the spiders, the spiders COME BACK.
Stranger: lay off the coke f*g cya
You: NO!
You: WAIT!
You: They all leave...why do they all leave?
Stranger: trip bag
Stranger: cya
You: Is it because...
You: It's because...
You: Oh god, they must be mad!
You: That explains all of it.
You: Why they can't see the spiders.
You: Why they look at me, like, like...
You: ...
You: Is he still here?
You: I think I can see your smell.
Stranger: the spiders are coming my friend
You: No, aha, aha, no!
You: No, because YOU'RE here!
You: But see, you see them too!
Stranger: sorry there coming
You: Oh, good, you're sane!
Stranger: ahhhhhhh
Stranger: there eating me
Stranger: ahaahhaha
Stranger: ouch
Stranger: ouch
Stranger: ouch
Stranger: ahhhh
You: AH GOD!
Stranger: get them to stop
Stranger: please
Stranger: call 911
Stranger: the fbi is coming to your house i sent them
You: What?
You: Oh, don't be silly.
Stranger: there coming
Stranger: i called
You: The FBI don't exist.
You: It's a hoax.
You: What are you, stupid?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Mr. Moon
2009-05-09, 06:12 PM
I love this game.

Stranger: EINDHOVEN DE GEKSTE!!
You: They got Maxiine today.
Stranger: hi btw
You: She was going for a walk and they grabbed her.
You: Oh god, I could hear her scream for hours...
Stranger: so what...?
You: They'll get me soon.
You: *shudders*
Stranger: couldnt be soon enough, if u ask me
You: You aren't from here, you don't understand.
Stranger: where's 'here'¿?
You: The wolves do... horrible things.
You: I'll never forget Lex's corpse...
You: Her face.
You: That's all they didn't mangle.
You: And she was screaming.
Stranger: They got lex AND Maxiine!!??
You: The last words I told her... I never got to say good-bye.
You: She died thinking I hated her.
Stranger: well done!
You: Oh god...
Stranger: so, is this conversation going anywhere?
You: Going anywhere?
You: Where is there left to go?
You: If I try to leave the village, they will find me.
Stranger: the toilet, perhaps?
You: If I stay, they will find me.
You: I have no choice but to hide and wait and hope the Masons save me.
Stranger: if i were u i would hide on the toilet
You: No. They already got that.
You: All I have is the celler.
You: The trap door is locked, it'll take them some time to lift it.
You: ... I hope.
Stranger: ok.. but where are u from?
You: Pangia.
Stranger: never heard of that....
Stranger: EINDHOVEN DE GEKSTE!!


Oh, Rutskarn, you're my commander now. Hope you don't mind.

Stranger: hi aisa
You: Are you Rutskan?
Stranger: what?
You: *sighs*
Stranger: ....
You: I'm trapped here, then.
Stranger: whats that?
Stranger: dont know about that
Stranger: in london right?
You: Rutskan is my CO.
Stranger: i see
Stranger: why not call 911
You: I'm taking heavy fire.
Stranger: that works well
You: I need back up.
Stranger: great
Stranger: hold on man
Stranger: let me back up
Stranger: fire in the hole
Stranger: wel the counter terrists win
You: Just like that?
You: No, it won't be that easy.
Stranger: then should i bring M16 or AK47?
You: These are the Combine we're talking about.
You: Oh GOD STRIDER.

Stranger: hi
You: YOU ARE IN A DUNGEON. ROLL DEX.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You: You just lost the game.
Stranger: hi
Stranger: wanna haev a hot chat??
You: The GAME.
You: You LOST IT.
Stranger: ur too slow
Stranger: buddy imprv ur typing spd..
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Lawl whut? I'm waaay faster than he was.

You: They're going to get us all.
You: They will find us and they will kill us all.
You: Oh god, they're back!
You: The men in the white coats!
You: No!
Stranger: I KNOW
Stranger: set up for the outbreak

Vespe Ratavo
2009-05-09, 06:41 PM
Ooooh. I can have so much fun with this. *evil grin*


Stranger: hi
You: I am Andrew Ryan
You: And I am here to ask you a question
You: Is a man not entitled to the sweat of his brow?
You: "No!" says the man in Washington, it belongs to the poor.
You: "No!" says the man in the Vatican, it belongs to God.
You: "No!" says the man in Moscow, it belongs to everyone.
You: I rejected those answers.
You: Instead
You: I chose something different
You: I chose the impossible
You: I chose
You: Rapture
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hi
You: Greeting: Hello, meatbag!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Stranger: hellu :3
Stranger: u.u
You: Don't talk. Just listen. The bodies are buried behind the deli. Bring the girl and the package to 3rd and Congress at 0500 hours. Delta Four-One-One out.
Stranger: O_O wut?
Stranger: u got the wrong person :(
You: ...you do realize I'll have to kill you now, right?
Stranger: ull never find me :P
You: Damnation.
Stranger: i win :)
You: v.v
Stranger: :D
Stranger: wat bodies?
You: I've said too much. Good day, stranger.
Stranger: no wait
Stranger: i can help
You have disconnected.

InaVegt
2009-05-09, 07:32 PM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Say hi
You: Hi.
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: omg
Stranger: :D
Stranger: OH FINALLY

Stranger: how did you find!!!!
Stranger: me
You: Better pay up.
You: Ten million USD.
Stranger: :p
Stranger: how are you?
You: Good, now that I've found you and you will be paying me the money.
You: Or do you intend to go six feet under?
Stranger: what's your name?
You: You damn well know my name.
You: I mean, how could you forget the name of your God-Empress?
Stranger: ok
Stranger: ill pay
Stranger: tell me how
You: Place the money under the golden gate bridge, I've placed a small safe there.
Stranger: what safe means?
You: A strong metal case to keep things safe.
Stranger: ok
You: The keycode is 23-65-11
Stranger: I'm going right now
You: Don't forget it.
Stranger: ok
Stranger: see you
Stranger: bye
You: bye.
You have disconnected.

B-Man
2009-05-09, 08:23 PM
I can't believe someone hasn't tried this yet >>

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: How are you gentlemen !!
You: All your base are belong to us.
Stranger: really?
You: You are on the way to destruction.
Stranger: {Link removed}
You: You have no chance to survive make you time.
You: Ha ha ha ha !!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Had a couple other fun ones:
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: How I've waited for you to come.
You: I've been here all alone.
Stranger: wait what?
You: Now that you've arrived please stay a while and I promise I won't keep you long.
Stranger: hello?
You: I,ll keep you forever
Stranger: ?? what?
You: You don't know Slayer?
Stranger: what?
You have disconnected.
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: cute girl with msn ?
You: No and no
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Did you receive the package?
Stranger: shhhhhh.
You: Oh, right. My bad.
Stranger: we don't talk about that here. the lines are tapped.
You: ****! The lines are bein tapped!?
Stranger: what the hell Tony? Petey didn't tell you?
You: No, he didn't! That ****er!
You: I'm going to have to stab his ass!
Stranger: Have you seen Petey today? Something must be up.
You: No, I've not seen Petey today.
You: He's not been in contact with me for a week now.
Stranger: that doesn't sound typical to me.
Stranger: meet me in the Baker Street garage.
Stranger: we'll head over and see what's going on.
Stranger: 5 minutes.
You: Alright. Five minutes it is.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

InaVegt
2009-05-09, 08:27 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: hey whaddup
You: Is this Rutskarn?
Stranger: :)
Stranger: yes!
Stranger: :D
You: I want my money back.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hhhheeeeyy
You: Hi
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: noo
You: Can you help me find him?
Stranger: no (:
You: He owes me money, big time.
You: If you find him and make him pay, you get half, deal?
Stranger: no1 can do that
You: Why not?
You: We're talking about millions of dollars here.
Stranger: why would he give me it ?
You: Tell him the God-Empress sent you.
You: He'll understand.
Stranger: okay
Stranger: lemme go search
You: Thank you.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hi
Stranger: yoyoyoyoyoyoyoyoyo
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: Lol Wuts that ?
Stranger: I r canadian!
You: Rutskarn is a fellow.
You: Fedora, Brown coat, likes to smoke cigars under lamp posts.
You: He owes me money, big time.
Stranger: oh yes. that is me
Stranger: I WILLZ PAY
Stranger: I JUST NEED MORE TIME
\
You: Okay, pay up dude.
You: Time's up.
Stranger: *Starts to cry*
You: Ten million US dollars, right now, or you'll be having an encounter with mister bullet.
Stranger: *pulls out his pistol* No! times up for you buddy!
Stranger: *fires the full round but misses every shot*
You: Have you got any last words, Rutskarn?
Stranger: R we really online or is this all just fake?
You: *shoots bullet through head*
You: Farewell
You have disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: from?
You: hi
Stranger: from?
You: hi
Stranger: from?
You: hi
Stranger: hioi
You: hi
Stranger: name?
You: hi
Stranger: aff
You: hi
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

B-Man
2009-05-09, 09:37 PM
Wow... this is fun! :smallbiggrin:


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Your call cannot be completed as dialled. Please hang up and try your call again.
Stranger: Hi
You: This is a recording.
Stranger: yeah
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

EDIT: Recon mission:

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Did you make it to the checkpoint all right?
Stranger: yes
You: Excellent to hear.
You: Your report?
Stranger: all good
You: Optimal conditions, yes this is most excellent.
You: Was the bush on the left or the right of the objective?
Stranger: Left,but futher thanwe had anticipated
You: Damn. When is the guardian to return to her post?
Stranger: I-Imnot sure sir
You: Damn...
You: To heck with it! Grab the milk! WE'RE GETTING THAT PIE!
Stranger: right-o!
You have disconnected.

Trog
2009-05-09, 10:56 PM
Stranger: hello
You: this is a wretched hive of skum and villany
Stranger: ?
You: not that you probably aren't nice
You: but DANG. All sorts of weird convos
Stranger: yea ikr
You: *read that as " yeah IKEA"*
You: well so how long before interesting people arrive you think?
You: I give em 15 minutes then I'm going to the pub without em
Stranger: ok?
You: I'm glad you're on boad
You: *board
Stranger: umm sure.. lets go with that
You: just keepin it surreal
You: since I have nothing else to talk about anyhow
Stranger: mhmm
You: and -you're- sure verbose
Stranger: ?
You: sarcasm. I was saying you talk a lot
Stranger: oooo
You: you just keep sitting there looking good I'll do the talking.
Stranger: kk
You: If they ask us where the money is just show them some leg
Stranger: ummm ok?
You: always a good distraction
You: or maybe an arm
Stranger: an arm?
You: or whatever you have on hand
You: maybe an elbow. Wink wink nudge nudge
Stranger: lol
You: Anyhow they aren't here yet. And that means pub
You: So you brought your car yes?
Stranger: umm sure y not
You: ah. good. I plan to get stinking drunk and hit on bartenders
You: because... you know.... they never get drunks hitting on them. this will make their day
You: *walks to car* so this is it then eh? It get good mileage?
Stranger: umm sure
You: so like two... three miles to a liter tops then?
You: gallon even
Stranger: ok lets go with that
You: *hops in car* We're off!
Stranger: umm ok
You: *fiddles with radio stations*
Stranger: lol
You: Nothing on but talk radio. What's the deal?
You: ah. AM.... that explains it
You: *switches to FM*
Stranger: lol
You: *finds a song with a good beat just as we arrive at the pub*
Stranger: ok
You: I think there's a spot to park over there *points to a very narrow spot*
Stranger: umm ok
You: *hops out so you can pull in and then places a card on the car next to yours saying something about next time leaving a can opener so you can get the car out*
Stranger: ummm ok??
You: did you bring your ID?
Stranger: sure
You: well good *walks to the front door, shows bouncer ID*
You: What do you mean fake?!
Stranger: ??
You: That's me! I always look like that on camera
Stranger: lol
You: tell him would you?
You: This guys berzerk pituitary gland is interfering with his ability to compare faces I thin-OW! HEY! KWIDDIT! OW!
Stranger: ??
You: *is tossed into a nearby dumpster by bouncer*
Stranger: aww r u ok?
You: well I smell like Old Milwaukee and ashtrays but I'm fine I think.
Stranger: lol
You: *climbs out and brushes off*
You: Well looks like the pub is out of the question where to next?
Stranger: umm idk
You: International Date-a-Kitten? Infernal Detective Klan? at this time of night?
Stranger: it means i dont know
You: I dunno... sounds weird to me
Stranger: ??
You: well as much fun as it has been typing atcha I think I'm gonna head home and wash up so I don't smell like a dumpster. Good luck getting the car out and the Date-a-Kitten thing. Go for a tabby. Tabby's are nice. *waves*
Stranger: wtf?? umm ok

Klose_the_Sith
2009-05-09, 11:04 PM
Oooooh Shenanigans! Lemme have a go >.>

GIGIGIGIGIGIGI!

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: gi
You: gi>
Stranger: hi**
You: gi<
You: GIGIGIGIGI
You: <><><><>
Stranger: ¬¬
Stranger: are you japanese?
You: i is not be asian
You: i is be australian ^^
You: i can english speak well
Stranger: kkkkkk
Stranger: you are a lyer
You: GIGIGIGIGIGI
You: i am not a liar!
You: this outrage shakes me to the very bone
You: oh the shakes
You: oh, the spins
You: lets do the time warp again
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

O_O;;

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: heya
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Hmmm ...

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi :D asl?
You: what, no time for foreplay?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Well, she did

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hello random stranger
You: mummy told me not to talk to strangers
You have disconnected

Well you asked >.>

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: why hallo thar ^^
Stranger: where u from
You: my mother O=
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

I really thought they were the one ...

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: simple, yet profound
You: i feel as if i know you already
You: shall we dance?
Stranger: whats ur name
You: there is no need for formalities between us
You: our bond runs deeper then the oceans
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

(I had a good one where I pretended to be the spirit of an ancient mariner, but it was so NSFW that I'm still scrubbing my eyes)

Some people got no originality

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hi
Stranger: from?
You: gah
You: dude
You: we already did this routine
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

There are some other good NSFW ones but ehhhh

B-Man
2009-05-10, 12:16 AM
I've been finding myself having actual conversations with people on Omegle and boy is it refreshing! Until you have people that ask for a/s/l.



Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: Hello
Stranger: asl?
You: Must we entertain this line of thought again?
Stranger: up 2 u
You: I really do dislike that "asl" is being used as an ice breaker. Should consider using something else, in my opinion.
Stranger: ok ssorry?
You: I mean, some people enjoy the anonimity of chatting here.
Stranger: ok\
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Also, just a little side note, is anyone having trouble using the AIMbot for Omegle?

Uncle Festy
2009-05-10, 12:23 AM
Yeah. I had a really nice conversation with one person – we ended up trading MSNs and talking for like two hours. Nice guy, to say the least. :smalltongue:

Phase
2009-05-10, 12:48 AM
Yeah. I had a really nice conversation with one person – we ended up trading MSNs and talking for like two hours. Nice guy, to say the least. :smalltongue:

You should totally be asleep, but I've been on all night trying to convince people I'm from City 17, so I shouldn't talk.

Rutskarn
2009-05-10, 01:09 AM
Funny how these shenanigans come and go, in spurts.

Phase
2009-05-10, 03:01 AM
I just happened to make small talk with a delightful young woman from Seattle. It appears we both enjoy the Half-Life series, and we exchanged AIM addresses.

Anonomuss
2009-05-10, 03:56 AM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hi
Stranger: how are you?
You: Good thanks. YOu?
Stranger: good
You: Anything interesting happen?
Stranger: no
You: Shame.
You: Wait, never?
Stranger: yes
Stranger: just kidding
Stranger: just now nothing interesting is happening
You: Oh, okay.
You: So that's why you're here?
You: For entertainment?
Stranger: yes
You: Oh. I guess I should have had a stronger opener then.
You: Want me to start again?
Stranger: no
Stranger: it is fine
Stranger: hobbies?
You: I personally prefer Calvin
Stranger: what?
You: Of calvin and hobbes?
Stranger: to be called?
You: I prefer Calvin
Stranger: what no
Stranger: what are your hobby(ies)
You: What do you mean by a "hobby"?
You: Is it another word for realtives?
Stranger: an activity or interest pursued for pleasure or relaxation and not as a main occupation: Her hobbies include stamp-collecting and woodcarving.
You: Oh. right.
You: I like winding people up on Omegle
Stranger: You live in America?
You: Sometimes. It depends what mood I'm in.
Stranger: so you lie to people
Stranger: like i live in canada
You: No!
Stranger: but i live in America
You: I alter reality to better attune myslef to the conversation.
Stranger: or you own a G5
Stranger: and travel
You: I am noone, living nowhere, of an indeterminate gendre, because that's all you're ever going to get on an annonymous website.
Stranger: like a pimp
You: *Sigh|*
You: Yes, I am an American Millionare with a G5 who is also a pimp
You: And travels
Stranger: well i have 7 G5s so suck it
You: *bow*
You: Your majesty, I had no idea you were so well endowed!
Stranger: 7 deaths
You: 2 left
Stranger: you will make a 8th
Stranger: and then i will have 8 G5s
You: I look forward to it. Pistols at dawn?
Stranger: no
You: Wow... I'll have 8 G5's...
Stranger: it could be tomorrow or a year
You: Well. Now I know you're better off than I am.
Stranger: one day you won't even know when it happened
You: What's to stop me hunting you down.
You: I know where you live.
Stranger: sniper shot to the head
You: You don't know where I live
You: Can
You: 't shoot me
Stranger: I can track you
You: If you don't kno who or where I am
You: No you can't
Stranger: all people with G5s can be found
You: And how to you know I have a G5?
Stranger: unless u never use it
You: Unless I never had it.
You: Now. You will admit you're being immature about the whole thing. We'll smile, shake hands and walk away.
Stranger: unless you don't have it yet
You: It's the internet, based on the world.
You: Everyone lies.
Stranger: indeed
Stranger: everyone in the world lies
Stranger: saying they don't
Stranger: is a lie
You: Johnathan Gabriels Greater Internet ****wad theory has yet to be proved wrong
Stranger: in real life
Stranger: you do lie though
You: Do I?
Stranger: lots of times
You: How do you know?
You: Do I even exist?
Stranger: everyone does
Stranger: you do
Stranger: even if you are not a person
Stranger: you sit exist
Stranger: still
You: Or do I?
You: Who is to say you exist?
You: That is but perception and belief which is infinately mutable.
Stranger: but to say we don't exist is false
Stranger: we may not exist in real world
You: It is not, it is just as valid as saying we exist.
Stranger: but we do exist in a fake world then
You: There is no proof we have ever existed after our deaths.
You: There is no proof that there has anything that has led up to life
Stranger: yet we do not kno if we have died before
You: There is no proof what you dream when you sleep isn't as real as the keyboard I am typing on
You: There is no proof for either you or I that even these things exist.
Stranger: so you say you are real
You: Perception.
You: Reality
You: Belief
You: I see no difference
Stranger: red pill or blue pill
You: Why bother.
You: Neither is a reality.
You: Neither is true/
You: There is no spoon in this world or the next
Stranger: well that was fun
You: Was it?
You: At least now you can say something exciting happened.
Stranger: no
You: Or can you?
Stranger: not really
Stranger: good bye


I'm still not convinced they ever existed.

Shades of Gray
2009-05-15, 08:38 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: ok ok
Stranger: please
Stranger: listen to me
Stranger: im locked in a cage in this serial killers house
Stranger: he plans on skinning me
You: Wow, me too.
Stranger: you wouldnt happen to be that guy in the cage in the other room would you?
You: I don't know. I don't think there are other rooms.
You: Where are you being held? What city?
Stranger: detroit rock city
You: Waiiit. There's only one person being held there in a cage.
You: That means...
You: I.
You: Am.
You: You.
Stranger: AHHHHHHH
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Xallace
2009-05-15, 10:17 PM
So my first use of Omegle ended up with a very philosophical conversation with a gal from China. Also Engrish really happens, but I would feel bad posting it.

So my SECOND conversation ended like this:


Stranger: how was your day?
You: Long, boring. Yourself?
Stranger: the same.
You: Hm.
You: However today I did decide that "Zeit" is the best word for "time."
You: Germans got it right.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

What? Really?

EDIT:


Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: So, you like showtunes?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Yarram
2009-05-16, 05:08 AM
Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Greetings serf.
Stranger: hello
You: How art thou progressing in labours?
Stranger: now what does that mean
You: ... Serf...
You: You will not talk back to your overlord unless requested.
You: Acknowledged?
Stranger: **** you.........
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hello
Stranger: hi~where are you from?
You: Will you be my friend?
Stranger: think about that
You: Huh?
Stranger: where are you from?
You: I am from Giantitp
You: It is a small town in Taiwan
You: Where are you from?
Stranger: korea
You: Where is Korea?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.




Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: hi!
Stranger: hey there
You: Comply by instructions please.
Stranger: will do
You: Acknowledged
Stranger: yes ma'am/sir
You: You have not yet complied.
Stranger: i comply i comply
Stranger: i acknowledge
You: Missile launch sequence will be enabled unless instruction is complied with in 20 seconds.
Stranger: what is the instruction?!?!?!?
You: Ten seconds.
Stranger: in tic tac toe, there can be no winner!
You: Missile launch sequence is being enabled.
You: Where does target live?
Stranger: ur weird
Stranger: usa
Stranger: where is silo located?
You: Usa, country verified.
You: Please locate state.
Stranger: your idea of role playing isn't exactly what your sex therapist meant
You: State location denied, initiating carpet bombing sequence. Target "USA."
Stranger: oh no! please will someone save me
You: Carpet bombing need's presidential verification.
Stranger: chuckles
You: Put the President on the line please.
Stranger: not until you tell me your age, gender, and location
Stranger: then the president can talk all he wants
You: Due to carpet bombing mode in activation, ASL will not be revealed.
Stranger: how to deactivate?
You: Carpet bombing mode can be deactivated by a requisition of compliance by complying with first instructions.
Stranger: repeat first instructions
You: You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hahahahahahaha you're effing crazy
Stranger: hi!
You: Compliance accepted
You: Normality activated.
You: Former question "not until you tell me your age, gender, and location" activated:
You: 17-Male-Giantitp
Stranger: and had you told me that sooner, i could have done this ages ago
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Are you Ruskarn?
Stranger: ??
Stranger: hi
You: ****.
You have disconnected.



Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi~
You: pew
Your conversational partner has disconnected.



Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Have you ever killed someone?
Stranger: Co Gall?
Stranger: No!
You: Why not?
You: What stops you from killing people?
Stranger: No, I'm nice.
You: I'm nice.
Stranger: Where?
You: All over.
Stranger: ?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Anonomuss
2009-05-16, 04:02 PM
I think we're getting through to the community at large...



Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: Hi
You: Rutskarn?
Stranger: How the **** did I end up with u again?
Stranger: FML
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Klose_the_Sith
2009-05-16, 08:37 PM
Here I go again?

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: i'm a knight on a quest to slay schroedingers dragon
You: are you rutskarn by any chance?
Stranger: no
You: dang
You: he has the enchanted scroll of enchanting scrolls of enchantment
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Connecting to server...
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: o.O it's a fluffy bunny KILL IT
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: ohai thar fellow changleing
You: changeling*
You: gah
Stranger: ha?
You: my claws are poorly shaped to utilise this interface
You: let me shape shift them
You: there
You: now all is better
Stranger: r u insane?
You: only if i shapeshift INTO a crazy person
You: or if i return to the asylum
You: but that would be admitting defeat, amirite?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Yarram
2009-05-18, 05:31 AM
Heh... This one was fun:


Stranger: hola
You: Are you Rutskarn?
Stranger: Yes, I am Rutskarn.
You: S*** man. You gotta help me. Where should I hide the f*****g bodies?
Stranger: There were bodies? Gaaa
Stranger: Okay, listen
You: Yes?
Stranger: Go down to 117th and Rinsler. There a butcher shop there.
Stranger: Man named Addison runs it
You: Ok.
Stranger: When you see him, he'll ask you a question
Stranger: the answer to the question is 'smells like carrots'
Stranger: This way you will know who each are
Stranger: other are
You: I got you man. Thanks.
Stranger: Good luck
You: Great
You: Um...
You: What about the cop's though?
You: What do I say to them?
Stranger: Hurry. The butcher will deal with them.
You: It'll look pretty ****ing suspicious running down the street with a sack of bodies man...
Stranger: fffffff
You: ****it. I'll get lucky.
Stranger: so long

Almn
2009-05-29, 08:35 AM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Hey
Stranger: oh hai thar
You: How are you?
Stranger: i r ud thnx, r u?
Stranger: *gud soz
You: I am well.
Stranger: iz gud
You: Indeed
Stranger: u iz cat too?
You: No, but I have encountered your kind before.
You: I'm not realy one of those diabolical mastermind "correct spelling" cats
Stranger: we has own websitez; is lulcatz? u knw us
Stranger: ah i c
You: They are fools.
Stranger: no we r superiur 2 u
You: They think they can conquor the world.
Stranger: we wil rule teh worldz
You: They do not know my secret plans!
You: At all.
Stranger: oh ma godz, haw u knw wht i goin to say ?
You: And this is a crying shame.
Stranger: r u kat killer?
Stranger: tht nut kool
You: Because without the plans, all the other cats will be left in the dust!
You: I I alone will rule supreme!
Stranger: U R CATZ!!
You: I am not.
Stranger: u jst sed u were?
Stranger: u r DOGFG??
You: At all. Those fools will believe anythting. While they concentrate on cheezburgers and psionics I am gaining power!
You: Soon I will have an army!
You: Be warned cats! Your doom is nigh!
You: HAHAHAHAH!
Stranger: U R DOGZ
Stranger: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

How do you use spoiler tags?

Black_Pants_Guy
2009-05-29, 10:43 AM
You: Rutskarn is that you?
Stranger: it could be
Stranger: what do u want?
You: Oh, thank God man. I'm on my way over. The girl OD'd and I need your help. If the boss finds out, he'll kill me!
Stranger: ok calm down
Stranger: call 911
You: you sir are a liar.
You: Rutskarn would start up the incinerator!
he logged off after that...


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hey
Stranger: you from?
You: Australia.
You: You?
Stranger: Asia
You: cool.
You: what country exactly?
You: because on a technicality I could have just said 'Asia' as well...
Stranger: china
Stranger: u?
You: You: you from?
Stranger: Australia.
Stranger: You?
Stranger: aha sorry i konw
Stranger: you girl?
You: yes.
You: you?
Stranger: no
Stranger: i'm a man
You: a man or a boy?
Stranger: ah boy
Stranger: how old are you ?
You: 16
Stranger: i.m 20
Stranger: what do you like
?
You: surfing and stuff
Stranger: ah cool
Stranger: i think you like football
You: nah, why watch football if you can surf man?
You: surfing is the life essence!
You: wake up everyday to those cold waves.
You: get my board and just grind those waves man.
Stranger: ah It seems that you like surfing
Stranger: i'm very envious you
Stranger: sorry
Stranger: i have to go know
Stranger: good bye
You: but don't you want to surf man?
You: CONTROLL THE WAVES MAN!
You: DON'T LET THE WAVES CONTROLL YOU!
Stranger: you have msn?
You: yeah man.
Stranger: no no
Stranger: i have to go now
Stranger: you add my msn
You: k, man.
Stranger: chen_yan520@live.com
Stranger: i have to go now
You: cool, talk to ya later man.
You have disconnected.

I think this dude was actually attracted to this persona, the persona of a rather 'enlightened', dim-witted, non-existent surfer-chick.:smalltongue:


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: the computer implies that I should reply 'Hi' in return:
You: Hi
Stranger: indeed
You: now answer truthfully mortal: Rutskarn is that you?


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Hi, I'm currently going around this sight asking if they know about this awesome site, its called 'RULES 1&2' you ever heard of it?
Stranger: sorry i don:t understand
You: do you know of RULES 1&2?
Stranger: no
You: of 'Anonymous'?
You: thats bad stuff man
Stranger: oh
You: here is a link: RULES 1&2
Stranger: you from?
You: I'm from the internet.
Stranger: which country?
You: I'm sorry but I don't exist in your 'real world' as many others before you have mentioned.
Stranger: no sorry
You: I exist in the internet.
Stranger: how old?
You: 20 years give or take.
Stranger: boy?
You: I don't know, I don't have a penis if that is what you are implying.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

best one yet in my opinion.


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: Rutskarn is that you?
Stranger: nah
You: ****...
Stranger: what happened?
You: can't tell: secret mafia business pal...
Stranger: ahh yeah man, I know the drift.
Stranger: killing someone dude?
You: Yeah...
Stranger: fair enough
Stranger: I do it all the time :/
You: do you know a good place to hide bodies?
Stranger: now dude...
Stranger: if you've got a furnace
Stranger: close by
Stranger: burning em does the trick
You: I can't contact Rutskarn so I can't use his furnace.
Stranger: Rutskarn has a furnace?
You: yeah
Stranger: where ya from?
You: Castle Choler
You: Rutskarn lives downstairs.
Stranger: Castle Choler ey?
Stranger: I live down under in a place call Wannderoo
Stranger: couple of village people live near me.
Stranger: They'll eat the corpses if the furnace doesn't work.
You: you run some sort of Pie-shop?
Stranger: Four and Twenty bra.
Stranger: best pies in the village
Stranger: how do you get the net in such an isolated place?
You: Satelite Internet.
Stranger: ahhh reallly
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Rutskarn is that you?
Stranger: OMG!
Stranger: At last!
Stranger: I've been looking everywhere for you dude.
You: Oh, thank God man. I'm on my way over. The girl OD'd and I need your help. If the boss finds out, he'll kill me!
Stranger: Go now! quick!
Stranger: Can you get me a box of donuts?
Stranger: Any will do.
Stranger: I just need donuts
Stranger: Please?
Stranger: Dude!
Stranger: Are you there?
You: yeah
You: making sure the body is in the boot properly.
You: can't have it opening on the way over.
Stranger: Yeah we wouldnt want that.
You: sure; donuts, what type?
Stranger: jelly
Stranger: you know what? forget the donuts. just hurry up man
You: ok.
You: should I wrap it up in a tarp just in case?
Stranger: Not necessary/
You: oh god. the foam coming out of her mouth...
You: gonna need this cleaned.
Stranger: Dude quit playing around.
Stranger: What are you doing still online?
You: ok, ok. I'm getting in the car; I'll be over in a minute.
You: ok
You: I'm going
Stranger: hurry over here now.
You: bye
Stranger: go go go
alright; who dunnit?


You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Rutskarn is that you?
Stranger: r u black ?
You: OMG At last!
You: I've been looking everywhere for you dude.
Stranger: r u blond ?
You: Oh, thank God man. I'm on my way over. The girl OD'd and I need your help. If the boss finds out, he'll kill me!
Stranger: im black
Stranger: what sup *****
You: making sure the body is in the boot properly.
You: can't have it opening on the way over.
Stranger: Rutskarn is that you?
Stranger: _?_?_?_?_?_?_?_
You: should I wrap it up in a tarp just in case?
Stranger: i must go
Stranger: sorry
You: oh god. the foam coming out of her mouth...
You: gonna need this cleaned.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

gotta admit; Rutskarn based Shenanigans are the most entertaining.:smalltongue:

Jokasti
2009-10-22, 01:41 PM
I was about to start an Omegle thread, but I searched it first.
Great site.

Silence
2009-10-22, 03:53 PM
Rules 1 & 2


/b/rother.

7309
2009-10-22, 04:11 PM
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: Rutskarn?
Stranger: what's that?
You: It's a name. And you're obviously not him. But I need help.
You: I don't know what to do with the bodies.
You: There's too many. I ate as many as I could.
Stranger: okay
Stranger: what should i do then?
You: I burned the rest. But there's too many.
Stranger: ok
You: I don't know, give me something to work with here
Stranger: just 1 quetion first
Stranger: are u a human?
Stranger: :D
You: No, cat.
Stranger: wow that's nice
Stranger: i love cats
You: LoLcat, to be specific, you racist bastard

Eldan
2009-10-22, 04:18 PM
The body idea is nice. Gotta try that.
Bad luck on the first one:


Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey. are you april?
You: Hey.
You: And no, I'm not.
You: So, just to make sure... this is totally anonymous, right? You can't find out who I am.
Stranger: yep
You: Good... let me ask you a hypothetical question, then.
Stranger: k
You: Assuming you had, like, a dead policeman on your couch.
You: Who was shot totally accidentally by your shotgun while you weren't even in the room...
You: And you thought you had a fair chance of getting rid of all the blood stains...
You: And nobody knew where he went anyway...
You: Should I just bury him outside, or call the police?
You: I mean you.
You: In this hypothetical situation.
Stranger: hm
You: I'm not involved at all.
Stranger: id go
Stranger: back to /b/

Shraik
2009-10-22, 04:48 PM
Well on funny story

Stranger: Anita is a Whore!

You:god, No I'm not! Stop telling people that!

Stranger: Oh s**t...


I prowl that site as a man named Victor.
I talk in the third person, tell everyone how no one wants to talk to victor, then ask if they like T-rex's, and if they stay(usually the leave) I explain to them I love them.

Dogmantra
2009-10-22, 05:14 PM
I love wasting the people who want cybersex's time (and it's easier when you say you're 16 and female, I'm not, by the way!):

Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: hi
You: Hello
Stranger: asl
You: 16/f/england
Stranger: cool
Stranger: re u hot
You: Extremely
You: I might turn a fan on
Stranger: hahhaaa u re lier
You: No, I'm sweating quite a bit...
You: I have a pretty good judge of temperature
Stranger: give me your msn
You: Only after you give me your credit card details
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
Stranger: i
Stranger: h
Stranger: i
You: Hi
Stranger: asl
You: That's boring apparently.
You: How about we talk about kites instead?
You: Do you like flying kites?
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

And my crowning moment:
Connecting to server...
Looking for someone you can chat with. Hang on.
You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
A word of advice: "asl" is boring. Please find something more interesting to talk about!
You: Hey
You: a/s/l?
Stranger: hey u m or f
Stranger: im16 m canada
You: 16/female/England
Stranger: horny?
You: I'm so horny right now
Stranger: ihave 8inch ****
Stranger: wannasee?
You: It's because I'm a unicorn
You: You see, my mother was a centaur, but apparently the Unicorn gene is dominant
Stranger: illdominateyou
You: and my father was a unicorn, so here I am
You: Horny as can be
You: because I'm a unicorn
Stranger: msn baby?
You: wanna see a picture of me naked?
Stranger: yes
You: http://katemckinnon.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/unicorn.jpg (Note: That link is completely safe for work)
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

Roland St. Jude
2009-10-22, 05:18 PM
Sheriff of Moddingham: This thread was pleasantly deceased before today's necromancy, and it should stay that way (do not restart this topic) given the kinds of things people say on Omegle, that are not appropriate here.