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View Full Version : What if Jetstone summoned Parson?



T-O-E
2009-04-21, 03:54 PM
I just had an amusing thought.

What if Jetstone summoned Parson, not Stanley?

SteveD
2009-04-21, 05:14 PM
To wipe out their army, kill their chief warlord and capture their artefact? :p

The Glyphstone
2009-04-21, 06:45 PM
I think he means as an alternate story path - what if Jetstone had paid the cash for the "ultimate warlord" spell as insurance to absolutely make certain that Stanley went down, and Parson was at the head of the Coalition instead of Gobwin Knob...

Imgran
2009-04-21, 07:00 PM
The short answer is that they may not even have been able to. Gobwin Knob got the summoning spell off at least partly because they had a master class spellcaster. The Coalition's spellcasting talents have never been revealed to be particularly robust.

Besides, Ansom saw his vision of the perfect warlord when he looked in the mirror, and even if he could be persuaded that he wasn't the perfect candidate to lead the coalition himself, his description to Findamancer X in the Coalition ranks would not have brought Parson to Erfworld.

reignofevil
2009-04-21, 07:09 PM
Well, the battle would probably be a walkover.
You know.
Like every initial projection said it should be.

slayerx
2009-04-21, 07:55 PM
The short answer is that they may not even have been able to. Gobwin Knob got the summoning spell off at least partly because they had a master class spellcaster. The Coalition's spellcasting talents have never been revealed to be particularly robust.


first wanda is a masterclass croakamancer, her findamancy on the other hand is not as good... hence her complaining (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/erf0017.html) to Stanely and why Parson needed all that gear because the spell was offically a screw up (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/erf0118.html)

2nd of all, the RCC would have likely spent the full 500,000 smuckers to hire the findamancer to cast the spell



Besides, Ansom saw his vision of the perfect warlord when he looked in the mirror, and even if he could be persuaded that he wasn't the perfect candidate to lead the coalition himself, his description to Findamancer X in the Coalition ranks would not have brought Parson to Erfworld.

indeed
In essence though, because Ansom would likely pay for the fees to get a findamancy to cast the spell, he'd probably wound not get Parson, but a different, but still perfect warlord; but one that did not need as much help as Parson did... hell one of the things that might have actually screwed up the spell for wanda was because she used "Big genius" as her criteria; and the biggest genius she could find was a non-erfworld native

Kasavin
2009-04-22, 12:04 AM
Beyond the obvious fact that they wouldn't... They like their royalty and wouldn't want some vagabond warlord no matter how smart he is. Also, why spend the big pile of schmuckers when they already have numerous capable warlords? Stanley only did it because his back was to the wall and Wanda convinced him it was the only hope of victory.

Beyond that, well, the RCC would win by conquering Gobwin Knob. Whether or not Stanley would successfully escape to FAQ is another story. It wouldn't be interesting unless Parson actually had challengs to overcome. Then, Erfworld would be nothing but a comedy of memes and injokes.

BLANDCorporatio
2009-04-22, 03:53 AM
"Hey guys, we've got this city surrounded, outnumbered its troops 25 to 1, and their leader is notoriously strategically-impaired. Something doesn't look right, what say you, do we summon The Perfect Warlord(TM)?"

"Yes, let's all pitch in 1 gazillion shmuckers and our best casters for the job!"

*PLOT!*The love-child of Alexander the Great, Bellisarius and Ghenghis Khan appears.*PLOT!*

"Whoa ..."

"So, who gets to keep the warlord after we walk over Stanley's square head?"

"Well, we came with the idea so it's our Warlord."

"Nuh-uh, we brought the Findamancer! Dibs!"

*TPK*

Stanley wins.

Gez
2009-04-22, 09:09 AM
Ansom: "So this spell will summon the Perfect Warlord we need to defeat Stanley, without leaving him any chance at all?"
Casters: "Yes, Prince."
Ansom: "Alright. Do it. The RCC is nothing if not about overkill."
Casters: *summon*
Sound effect: "PLOT!"
Stanley: "Uh? What am I doing here?"
Ansom: *explodes*

T-O-E
2009-04-22, 09:58 AM
Well, it's not like they'd lose him. He'd still be usefu after the war's over.

I just thought it would be interesting. I now regret making this thread...

Killer Angel
2009-04-22, 10:26 AM
I just thought it would be interesting. I now regret making this thread...

the fact is that Jetstone had no reason to summon Parson. The Coalition outnumbered Stanley by 25:1, and, if this was not sufficient, Stanley was without warlords (and without the possibility to line up a decent one).
In this setting, they only need a slightly competent warlord, just to held the Coalition and to not make silly mistakes.

Still, if they really wanted to summon the perfect warlord (just to minimize their losses), they wouldn’t summon Parson. They would have summoned the perfect warlord to handle a battle with overwhelming odds in their favour (Montgomery-like, or someone else if you prefer).

I don't know if Parson is really the perfect warlord (in absolute terms)... it was certainly Perfect for the defense of Gobwin Knob.
Maybe NOW, he's becoming really the P.W.

SteveMB
2009-04-22, 11:12 AM
"Hey guys, we've got this city surrounded, outnumbered its troops 25 to 1, and their leader is notoriously strategically-impaired. Something doesn't look right, what say you, do we summon The Perfect Warlord(TM)?"

"Yes, let's all pitch in 1 gazillion shmuckers and our best casters for the job!"

*PLOT!*The love-child of Alexander the Great, Bellisarius and Ghenghis Khan appears.*PLOT!*

"Whoa ..."

"So, who gets to keep the warlord after we walk over Stanley's square head?"

"Well, we came with the idea so it's our Warlord."

"Nuh-uh, we brought the Findamancer! Dibs!"

*TPK*

Stanley wins.

LOL!

(It occurs to me that the flip side of that scenario is the only reason the Coalition would want to consider summoning an outside warlord -- they'd have someone who was equally foreign to all of them.)

raphfrk
2009-04-22, 12:03 PM
LOL!

(It occurs to me that the flip side of that scenario is the only reason the Coalition would want to consider summoning an outside warlord -- they'd have someone who was equally foreign to all of them.)

I wonder if it would be possible to transfer units to a coalition and if so, would they be loyal to the coalition via natural thinkamancy.

Glome
2009-04-22, 12:06 PM
Of course an interesting twist would be if Stanley summoned a perfect warlord and it popped on Jetstone's side, but Parson was still loyal to Stanley and not to Ansom. In which case the objective would be for Parson to destroy the coalition from the inside without getting caught.

BLANDCorporatio
2009-04-22, 12:31 PM
I wonder if it would be possible to transfer units to a coalition and if so, would they be loyal to the coalition via natural thinkamancy.


Think UN.

Therefore, no.