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Stormlock
2009-12-18, 11:45 PM
http://www.d20srd.org/srd/epic/monsters/geniusLoci.htm

Check it's skills. :smallbiggrin: I find it especially entertaining given the relevant stat.

sofawall
2009-12-18, 11:53 PM
How else do you explain earthquakes?

Temotei
2009-12-18, 11:55 PM
Hehe. +5. Jump. :smallbiggrin:

RebelRogue
2009-12-18, 11:57 PM
Is that a joke, now? It is a consequence of its low movement speed.

jmbrown
2009-12-18, 11:59 PM
Genius loci can't jump.

Temotei
2009-12-19, 12:05 AM
Genius loci can't jump.

Yes. :smallsmile:

Psychosis
2009-12-19, 12:19 AM
I chuckled.

Starscream
2009-12-19, 12:28 AM
Cute.:smallbiggrin:

Haven
2009-12-19, 12:32 AM
Heh. And here I thought there was only one joke (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/classes/monk.htm) in the SRD :smallamused:

Temotei
2009-12-19, 12:33 AM
Heh. And here I thought there was only one joke (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/classes/monk.htm) in the SRD :smallamused:

:smallamused:

Mongoose87
2009-12-19, 12:57 AM
Heh. And here I thought there was only one joke (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/classes/monk.htm) in the SRD :smallamused:

Silly person, the Soulknife is in there, too.

nekomata2
2009-12-19, 12:58 AM
Heh. And here I thought there was only one joke (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/classes/monk.htm) in the SRD :smallamused:

Sorry...two there be. (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/psionic/classes/soulknife.htm)

Edit: Mongoose ninja...

Temotei
2009-12-19, 01:00 AM
Which one is worse? The monk or the soulknife, in your opinion?

Mongoose87
2009-12-19, 01:02 AM
Which one is worse? The monk or the soulknife, in your opinion?

The Soulknife. Monks have better saves, and evasion.

Sstoopidtallkid
2009-12-19, 01:02 AM
Which one is worse? The monk or the soulknife, in your opinion?Soulknife. The Monk can survive. While not worth much in a party, that is at least an ability. The Soulknife has a weapon. That's not an ability at all, that's WBL.

Zom B
2009-12-19, 01:10 AM
I always found it funny the template examples given. For instance, Summon Monster III can summon a Celestial Bison - A holy cow.

In one of the monster books they have a gelatinous template. What do they apply it to as an example? A bear. So, a gummy bear.

Gralamin
2009-12-19, 02:04 AM
Honestly, I am quite sad that the d20srd Power List does not contain Déjà Vu twice, like the XPH does. The first time I saw that I thought I was crazy :smallbiggrin:.

herrhauptmann
2009-12-19, 02:37 AM
Honestly, I am quite sad that the d20srd Power List does not contain Déjà Vu twice, like the XPH does. The first time I saw that I thought I was crazy :smallbiggrin:.

Really? I don't have the XPH, but that's awesome right there.

Most of the material components for spells are minor jokes in their own right...
Black tentacle needs a piece of a giant octopus or squid.
Hold person is a nail (nailed to the floor).
Never said they were funny...

HealthKit
2009-12-19, 02:45 AM
Honestly, I am quite sad that the d20srd Power List does not contain Déjà Vu twice, like the XPH does. The first time I saw that I thought I was crazy :smallbiggrin:.

Yeah, the second time I saw it, I was like "Wait, why does look familiar...?"

Keld Denar
2009-12-19, 02:47 AM
Isnt there one in the DMG table of 100 traits. Yea, page 128.

100 - No sense of humor (See #26)

the joke is, there is no #26. It was probably caught during editing, and instead of fixing it, they added it in as a joke.

Gralamin
2009-12-19, 02:52 AM
Isnt there one in the DMG table of 100 traits. Yea, page 128.

100 - No sense of humor (See #26)

the joke is, there is no #26. It was probably caught during editing, and instead of fixing it, they added it in as a joke.

I almost forgot about that one.

I'm also sure there was another major one somewhere, but I don't remember what. It's bound to show up here.

Lysander
2009-12-19, 02:52 AM
Genius Loci are weird creatures. How far does the "emulation" go I wonder? I assume the ooze's goal is to lure in and eat prey? I wonder how it matches an enslaved good character's motivations with that...would they try to lure in evil creatures as snacks?

Cybren
2009-12-19, 02:54 AM
i don't get it

taltamir
2009-12-19, 02:56 AM
i don't get it

genious loci are collossal (125 tons or more) oozes that emulate "terrain" and cannot jump. They have 1 and exactly 1 skill. Jump.

InaVegt
2009-12-19, 03:10 AM
I also like this incantation (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/variant/magic/incantations.htm#callForththeDweller).

Note how you require 42 runes in a divination effect.

Nehh
2009-12-19, 03:19 AM
In one of the monster books they have a gelatinous template. What do they apply it to as an example? A bear. So, a gummy bear.

Which book is that? I'd like to see that.

Gralamin
2009-12-19, 03:20 AM
Which book is that? I'd like to see that.

Pretty sure it is Savage Species.

raitalin
2009-12-19, 07:14 AM
Isnt there one in the DMG table of 100 traits. Yea, page 128.

100 - No sense of humor (See #26)

the joke is, there is no #26. It was probably caught during editing, and instead of fixing it, they added it in as a joke.

Its actually a reference to the 3.0 DMG, which simply didn't have a #26. My group decided the missing trait was "flaming homosexual"

Or group sometimes rolls on the table for newly created PCs. This became especially amusing when 26 was rolled for a dwarven wizard named Stef Flamerod.

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 07:17 AM
One of my favourite jokes in third edition was in the Expanded Psionics handbook, in the powers section.

They printed Deja Vu in its correct place, then printed a few other powers... and then reprinted Deja Vu, word for word.

<3

tahu88810
2009-12-19, 09:19 AM
I also like this incantation (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/variant/magic/incantations.htm#callForththeDweller).

Note how you require 42 runes in a divination effect.

I believe that is also a reference to Cthulhu

KillianHawkeye
2009-12-19, 09:52 AM
genious loci are collossal (125 tons or more) oozes that emulate "terrain" and cannot jump. They have 1 and exactly 1 skill. Jump.

It's not a joke, people. (Neither is the +2 bonus a Succubus gets for Use Rope when binding someone; that's just a synergy bonus.)

This creature has no Int score, thus no skill points. Therefore, no skill needs a listing because they are all straight ability checks, with the exception of Jump which takes a modifier for the creature's speed. Srsly, ppl. :smallsigh:

Foryn Gilnith
2009-12-19, 09:57 AM
I'm going to ignore that and stay blissfully ignorant.

I do recall one D&D designer saying that all the humor in the books was subtle like this.

shadow_archmagi
2009-12-19, 10:33 AM
This creature has no Int score, thus no skill points. Therefore, no skill needs a listing because they are all straight ability checks, with the exception of Jump which takes a modifier for the creature's speed. Srsly, ppl. :smallsigh:

If it were a straight ability check, they wouldn't have bothered to write "Jump +5"

The idea of an immense, landscape-sized ooze JUMPING is hilarious.

Athaniar
2009-12-19, 10:40 AM
One of my favorite references is the material component for the Tounges spell:


A small clay model of a ziggurat, which shatters when the verbal component is pronounced. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tower_of_Babel)


(and please, no religious discussion must come from this)

taltamir
2009-12-19, 11:18 AM
Its actually a reference to the 3.0 DMG, which simply didn't have a #26. My group decided the missing trait was "flaming homosexual"

Or group sometimes rolls on the table for newly created PCs. This became especially amusing when 26 was rolled for a dwarven wizard named Stef Flamerod.
did someone in your group roll a 26? how did that pan out in terms of roleplay? :P

taltamir
2009-12-19, 11:19 AM
If it were a straight ability check, they wouldn't have bothered to write "Jump +5"

The idea of an immense, landscape-sized ooze JUMPING is hilarious.

he is saying that it is a racial bonus calculated based on its speed. Not an intentional joke.

Zom B
2009-12-19, 11:19 AM
Most of the material components for spells are minor jokes in their own right...
Black tentacle needs a piece of a giant octopus or squid.
Hold person is a nail (nailed to the floor).
Never said they were funny...

Solid Fog requires "A pinch of dried, powdered peas combined with powdered animal hoof."

I know the peas is a reference to "this fog is as thick as pea soup." I assume the animal hoof has something to do with gelatin, which would make sense.

CrazySopher
2009-12-19, 12:04 PM
Genius Loci are weird creatures. How far does the "emulation" go I wonder? I assume the ooze's goal is to lure in and eat prey? I wonder how it matches an enslaved good character's motivations with that...would they try to lure in evil creatures as snacks?

I always figured that a Genius Loci that had enslaved a Mindflayer would unconsciously go for targets that have the highest Int score.

UglyPanda
2009-12-19, 12:16 PM
Acid Fog has the same components.

A lot of material components are strange, overly appropriate, or meant to be funny. Some of them, I just don't get.

Other components:Animal Messenger - Morsel of food the animal likes.
Antimagic Field - Iron filings, due to association with fey.
Antipathy - Aluminum and Vinegar. Are these two materials nonreactive towards each other?
Bull's Strength - Bull crap, and/or hair of the bull.
Color Spray - Red, Yellow, Blue Powder.
Cone of cold - A crystal. In other words, a piece of ice.
Confusion - Nut shells
Crushing Despair - A vial of tears
Darkvision - A carrot or Agate
Detect Scrying - A mirror and an ear trumpet.
Fear - A chicken's heart or a white feather.
Glitterdust - Ground Mica. In other words, actual glitter.
Grease - Pork Rind or butter

RebelRogue
2009-12-19, 12:22 PM
One of my favorite references is the material component for the Tounges spell.
I personally like the Passwall material component :smallsmile:

But, to reiterate: it's explicitly stated because of the modification due to movement speed. It should be noted, however, that the rule of "-6 pr. 10' speed below 30'" has been modified to "-3 pr. 5' speed below 30'" in order to take the 5' speed into account.

awa
2009-12-19, 12:41 PM
Edit
never mind

Hal
2009-12-19, 03:20 PM
It's not a joke, people. (Neither is the +2 bonus a Succubus gets for Use Rope when binding someone; that's just a synergy bonus.)

This creature has no Int score, thus no skill points. Therefore, no skill needs a listing because they are all straight ability checks, with the exception of Jump which takes a modifier for the creature's speed. Srsly, ppl. :smallsigh:

Sorry, just thought I'd correctly identify you.

Oslecamo
2009-12-19, 03:24 PM
No mention for the minotaur's immunity to maze spells?

Because in the original legend the minotaur was traped inside a maze for all his life, so I guess it's natural evolution that the following generations developed a genetic resistance to it.:smalltongue:

Sinfire Titan
2009-12-19, 03:40 PM
Yeah, the second time I saw it, I was like "Wait, why does look familiar...?"

Funny thing really: When I first read that power, I looked up the term in a paperback dictionary I happened to have, and found the definition on two different pages. Imagine my surprise when I picked up where I left off in the XPH.


Cone of cold - A crystal. In other words, a piece of ice.


I find it funny that you ca use the Fighter's sword as a material component for a spell that deals cold damage...

Tavar
2009-12-19, 03:51 PM
I find it funny that you ca use the Fighter's sword as a material component for a spell that deals cold damage...

What are the rules for material components? Because, that actually might be a fun tactic to use for a more martial caster: grapple and enemy, and the cast cone of cold, using the opponents armor. Who says evocation sucks now!

Sinfire Titan
2009-12-19, 04:00 PM
What are the rules for material components? Because, that actually might be a fun tactic to use for a more martial caster: grapple and enemy, and the cast cone of cold, using the opponents armor. Who says evocation sucks now!

Let me ask TO. (http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=6718.msg219930#msg219930)

lesser_minion
2009-12-19, 04:06 PM
What are the rules for material components? Because, that actually might be a fun tactic to use for a more martial caster: grapple and enemy, and the cast cone of cold, using the opponents armor. Who says evocation sucks now!

Stilled Cone of Cold, actually.

You'd run into loot problems though (your share of the loot is the armour you just destroyed).

Sinfire Titan
2009-12-19, 04:08 PM
Stilled Cone of Cold, actually.

You'd run into loot problems though (your share of the loot is the armour you just destroyed).

Worth it for Arena types, and better than Sundering/MDJ. No save, no HP, no CL check, and lower level spell slot used.

The Glyphstone
2009-12-19, 04:27 PM
Wouldn't that only work for Fighters carrying Deep Crystal swords though?

Of course, in arenas that is every fighter, to negate Ironguard, but still.

Sinfire Titan
2009-12-19, 04:30 PM
Wouldn't that only work for Fighters carrying Deep Crystal swords though?

Of course, in arenas that is every fighter, to negate Ironguard, but still.

You aren't familiar with metals are you? They are crystalline substances, but much harder than standard crystals. Technically, the Ooze in the XPH that eats crystals is able to eat both rare gemstones and metal objects. Check Wikipedia, it should have an article regarding this subject.

RebelRogue
2009-12-19, 04:33 PM
I'm not really sure what would happen in a strict RAW sense, but surely, any sane DM would give the fighter a save of some kind!

Cybren
2009-12-19, 05:07 PM
Sorry, just thought I'd correctly identify you.

It wasn't funny to begin with

jmbrown
2009-12-19, 05:18 PM
It's not a joke, people. (Neither is the +2 bonus a Succubus gets for Use Rope when binding someone; that's just a synergy bonus.)

This creature has no Int score, thus no skill points. Therefore, no skill needs a listing because they are all straight ability checks, with the exception of Jump which takes a modifier for the creature's speed. Srsly, ppl. :smallsigh:

It still doesn't make sense. The monster has a strength modifier of +20. You get a -6 penalty to jump for every 10' below 30. He should have a +2 to jump so where exactly is he getting that extra +3?

The other oozes have racial bonuses to things like climb but the genius loci is the only ooze (that I know of) with ranks in jump and absolutely no racial modifiers. The fact that it's a colossal monster that emulates terrain, "enslaves" people, and is influenced by his slaves but consciously took the effort to make up for his poor jumping is funny to me.

Optimystik
2009-12-19, 05:43 PM
Most of the material components for spells are minor jokes in their own right...
Black tentacle needs a piece of a giant octopus or squid.
Hold person is a nail (nailed to the floor).
Never said they were funny...

Suggestion needs a snake tongue and honey.

Fireball makes you a chimp.

Asbestos
2009-12-19, 05:52 PM
One of my favourite jokes in third edition was in the Expanded Psionics handbook, in the powers section.

They printed Deja Vu in its correct place, then printed a few other powers... and then reprinted Deja Vu, word for word.

<3
Sorry to the original poster of this, but I couldn't resist.

RebelRogue
2009-12-19, 06:01 PM
It still doesn't make sense. The monster has a strength modifier of +20. You get a -6 penalty to jump for every 10' below 30. He should have a +2 to jump so where exactly is he getting that extra +3?
As I noted above, they've further quantized the penalty at -3 pr. 5' foot speed reduction below 30'. So +20 Str mod minus 5*(-3) for 5 reductions from 30'. Totalling at +5.

Oslecamo
2009-12-19, 06:03 PM
You aren't familiar with metals are you? They are crystalline substances, but much harder than standard crystals. Technically, the Ooze in the XPH that eats crystals is able to eat both rare gemstones and metal objects. Check Wikipedia, it should have an article regarding this subject.


Quicksilver would like to have a word with you. Almost all metals are crystaline, but not all of them, so generalizations like this are wrong and you should feel ashamed.

Unless you had the chance of studying the atomic structure of adamantium, mythril and enchanted metals, then you have no right to claim that oozes will nom nom trough any metal the adventurers may be wearing. In particular because we aren't even sure there's atoms in the D&D world. Cold iron is a rare expensive substance there after all.

Gamerlord
2009-12-19, 06:09 PM
One of my favourite jokes in third edition was in the Expanded Psionics handbook, in the powers section.

They printed Deja Vu in its correct place, then printed a few other powers... and then reprinted Deja Vu, word for word.

<3
Sorry to the original poster of this, but I couldn't resist.

RebelRogue
2009-12-19, 06:10 PM
Quicksilver would like to have a word with you. Almost all metals are crystaline, but not all of them, so generalizations like this are wrong and you should feel ashamed.
Mercury has a solid phase. It just happens to be liquid at room temperature.

Anyway, this is clearly not what was intended, so let's be gentlemen and leave the catgirls be.

Asbestos
2009-12-19, 06:13 PM
One of my favourite jokes in third edition was in the Expanded Psionics handbook, in the powers section.

They printed Deja Vu in its correct place, then printed a few other powers... and then reprinted Deja Vu, word for word.

Sorry, could not resit. I don't even own that book actually.

If you had copied the white text that I had, would've had me lolling. ALAS!

Gamerlord
2009-12-19, 06:15 PM
If you had copied the white text that I had, would've had me lolling. ALAS!

What? :smallconfused: Reread the post. I have no idea what you're talking about...:smalltongue:

Tavar
2009-12-19, 06:15 PM
One of my favorite jokes is the Complete Psionics. I mean, seriously, does anyone actually think that it was meant seriously?:smalltongue:

RebelRogue
2009-12-19, 06:17 PM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2eUopy9sd8

erikun
2009-12-19, 06:29 PM
I also like this incantation (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/variant/magic/incantations.htm#callForththeDweller).

Note how you require 42 runes in a divination effect.
Welcome to magic in D&D, really. Sulfer and guano (gunpowder) for Fireball? Looking through a prism for Read Magic? Rubbing metal rods against fur for Lightning Bolt?

Foryn Gilnith
2009-12-19, 07:13 PM
What? :smallconfused: Reread the post. I have no idea what you're talking about...:smalltongue:

Déjà Vu has already been mentioned in this thread. Then you mentioned it again.

Déjà Vu. :smalltongue:

Darcand
2009-12-19, 08:28 PM
I find it also important to point out they gave it a burrow speed too. If it replaces the landscape then what exactly is it burrowing under?

Flickerdart
2009-12-19, 08:37 PM
I find it also important to point out they gave it a burrow speed too. If it replaces the landscape then what exactly is it burrowing under?
It can impersonate caves, like in Star Wars.

shadow_archmagi
2009-12-19, 08:53 PM
Another great joke is that Deja Vu is printed twice in the XPH

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 08:56 PM
Another great joke is that Deja Vu is printed twice in the XPH

I think this joke has gone far enough.

Foryn Gilnith
2009-12-19, 08:56 PM
Another great joke is that Deja Vu is printed twice in the XPH

This is the fifth or sixth time, if I counted correctly. :P

Yucca
2009-12-19, 09:10 PM
The material component of detect thoughts is a copper piece.

A penny for your thoughts?

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 09:13 PM
Wait, seriously?

Hm. I wonder if I could somehow pay for something and get away from the merchant in one round...

(I am of course referring to Summon Component, which can summon any material component worse less than 1gp...)

Wait, on second thought, if a spell component pouch contains as many components as you need for your spells, do you even deduct the copper piece from your funds? Or is it in the pouch?

shadow_archmagi
2009-12-19, 09:28 PM
Wait, seriously?

Hm. I wonder if I could somehow pay for something and get away from the merchant in one round...

(I am of course referring to Summon Component, which can summon any material component worse less than 1gp...)

Wait, on second thought, if a spell component pouch contains as many components as you need for your spells, do you even deduct the copper piece from your funds? Or is it in the pouch?

It is in the pouch. Not that it matters, unless you're extremely poor and a constant mind-reader.

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 09:29 PM
If you are very patient I'm sure you could turn that into an infinite money loop.

UglyPanda
2009-12-19, 09:29 PM
Wait, on second thought, if a spell component pouch contains as many components as you need for your spells, do you even deduct the copper piece from your funds? Or is it in the pouch?Since a copper piece is worth less than 1 gp, you have an arbitrary number of them in your pouch. This means your 200 cp spell component pouch contains an arbitrary amount of cp as long as you keep ritualistically destroying them. Best not to think about this too much, like why any of the mundane items are priced the way they are.

By the way, did you know Deja Vu (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/OverusedRunningGag) is printed twice in the Expanded Psionics Handbook?

OOC:
Sigh, double ninja'd.

Salanmander
2009-12-19, 09:41 PM
If you are very patient I'm sure you could turn that into an infinite money loop.

Yes, but there's a much simpler infinite money loop called ranks in profession:(anything). It's not worth noting unless it's a *fast* infinite money loop.

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 09:44 PM
Yes, but there's a much simpler infinite money loop called ranks in profession:(anything). It's not worth noting unless it's a *fast* infinite money loop.

You don't really understand me, do you?

Just boosting my Profession modifier into the stratosphere is boring. Abusing the arbitrary amount of material components in my 2gp pouch is hilarious.

Salanmander
2009-12-19, 09:49 PM
You don't really understand me, do you?

Just boosting my Profession modifier into the stratosphere is boring. Abusing the arbitrary amount of material components in my 2gp pouch is hilarious.

Ooooooh, yeah, you're right. I thought you were in "I can do stupid things to D&D to make my character infinitely powerful" moed. "This is *hilarious* moed is a much better one to be in.

Roderick_BR
2009-12-19, 09:51 PM
Genius Loci are weird creatures. How far does the "emulation" go I wonder? I assume the ooze's goal is to lure in and eat prey? I wonder how it matches an enslaved good character's motivations with that...would they try to lure in evil creatures as snacks?

Imagine Mogo, the green lantern planet from DC comics. Or Ego, the living planet from Marvel Comics. That's the idea I got from it.

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 09:55 PM
Ooooooh, yeah, you're right. I thought you were in "I can do stupid things to D&D to make my character infinitely powerful" moed. "This is *hilarious* moed is a much better one to be in.

:smallconfused:

I'm not entirely sure how I should take this.

UglyPanda
2009-12-19, 09:57 PM
Ooooooh, yeah, you're right. I thought you were in "I can do stupid things to D&D to make my character infinitely powerful" moed. "This is *hilarious* moed is a much better one to be in.Unwritten Rule #15 of this board: He's not being serious. He is not going to use this in a game. He is only thinking about it so he has something to laugh about later.

erikun
2009-12-19, 10:07 PM
But what if I want my lv.10 Wizard to spend an entire year casting nothing but Summon Component?! I will have a whole 80 gp by the time I'm done!

(No really, that's about it. 16 spell slots of level 1 or more + 6 extra spell slots for 20 INT = 22 spell slots. 365 x 22 = 8030 slots = 8030 cp = 80 gp, 3 sp. Woohoo, I'm rich!)

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 10:10 PM
But what if I want my lv.10 Wizard to spend an entire year casting nothing but Summon Component?! I will have a whole 80 gp by the time I'm done!

(No really, that's about it. 16 spell slots of level 1 or more + 6 extra spell slots for 20 INT = 22 spell slots. 365 x 22 = 8030 slots = 8030 cp = 80 gp, 3 sp. Woohoo, I'm rich!)

Unfortunately each copper piece vanishes after six seconds no matter what you do with it.

Unless you have Persistent Spell, but even then it vanishes after 24 hours.

:smallfrown:

Oh well. I'm sure I could swindle someone.

Dixieboy
2009-12-19, 10:10 PM
I see a problem with your math.

Someone with 20 int wouldn't be trying that trick

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-19, 10:12 PM
I see a problem with your math.

Someone with 20 int wouldn't be trying that trick

I can very clearly see a 20 Int, 6 Wis character trying that.

Dixieboy
2009-12-19, 10:15 PM
Obviously not, there are no explosives involved.

Rixx
2009-12-19, 10:16 PM
Now, now, let's not bring character optimization into this lovely evening.

erikun
2009-12-19, 10:17 PM
I'm sure you could find a use for 1600 pounds of copper.

Copper floor tiling + Levitate + Shocking Grasp?

Mongoose87
2009-12-19, 10:48 PM
Now, now, let's not bring character optimization into this lovely evening.

There is nothing optimal about this.

Tyndmyr
2009-12-19, 10:58 PM
There is nothing optimal about this.

Optimizing for hilarity, sir.

Optimystik
2009-12-19, 11:24 PM
In one of the monster books they have a gelatinous template. What do they apply it to as an example? A bear. So, a gummy bear.

This made me smile.



A lot of material components are strange, overly appropriate, or meant to be funny. Some of them, I just don't get.

Other components:
Animal Messenger - Morsel of food the animal likes.
Antimagic Field - Iron filings, due to association with fey.
Antipathy - Aluminum and Vinegar. Are these two materials nonreactive towards each other?
Bull's Strength - Bull crap, and/or hair of the bull.
Color Spray - Red, Yellow, Blue Powder.
Cone of cold - A crystal. In other words, a piece of ice.
Confusion - Nut shells
Crushing Despair - A vial of tears
Darkvision - A carrot or Agate
Detect Scrying - A mirror and an ear trumpet.
Fear - A chicken's heart or a white feather.
Glitterdust - Ground Mica. In other words, actual glitter.
Grease - Pork Rind or butter

The first two I'm correcting you on, the others I'm just explaining because you didn't - I apologize in advance if you understood them already.

AMF: The iron filings are a reference to magnetic fields, not fey - in physics class, your teacher would use iron filings to make the repulsion of the field visible.

Antipathy: Uses Alum (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potassium_alum) which is different from aluminum. Not clear on its purpose, though. The vinegar might be a reference to the "catch more flies with honey" adage.

Color Spray: red, yellow and blue are the primary colors of paint or pigments.

Confusion: Nut shells - the spell makes people go "nuts."

Darkvision: carrots improve your eyesight. The agate I'm not sure about.

Detect Scrying: The mirror represents you rebounding the spy's efforts back onto him. The hearing trumpet I suppose helps you locate the scrying sensors, though I don't recall them making any noise.

Fear - Buh-KAWK!!

Random832
2009-12-19, 11:35 PM
Um, it's a "very small crystal or glass cone" - i.e. a cone, which is made of glass or of a crystal, and which is very small.

Metals used for weapons and armor are also not crystalline in structure anyway. If they were they would not be ductile.

RebelRogue
2009-12-19, 11:44 PM
Antipathy: Uses Alum (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potassium_alum) which is different from aluminum. Not clear on its purpose, though.
Well, alum and vinegar are bitter and sour respectively...

Gralamin
2009-12-20, 12:06 AM
Antipathy: Uses Alum (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Potassium_alum) which is different from aluminum. Not clear on its purpose, though. The vinegar might be a reference to the "catch more flies with honey" adage.

Potassium Alum is used in baking powder, you might know What (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPyjoY5NVQE) this reaction does.

Edit: That said, it likely means This Alum (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alum)

Nate the Snake
2009-12-20, 12:08 AM
Wait, on second thought, if a spell component pouch contains as many components as you need for your spells, do you even deduct the copper piece from your funds? Or is it in the pouch?

Sorry to put a damper on the "infinite copper pieces" trick, but detect thoughts requires a focus component, not a material component. So there is exactly one copper piece in your component pouch, since it is never consumed by the spell.

Optimystik
2009-12-20, 12:25 AM
Potassium Alum is used in baking powder, you might know What (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NPyjoY5NVQE) this reaction does.

While possible, I think it's more likely that the astringent property is being hinted at here. Remember those Tom and Jerry cartoons, where Tom would accidentally get Alum on his mouth and cause it to shrink?


Edit: That said, it likely means This Alum (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alum)

This article refers to the chemical classification Alum, rather than the trade name Alum, which is Potassium Alum (the one I linked.) In similar fashion, there are many chemicals that can be called salts, but the trade name Salt refers to a very specific one (i.e. Table Salt, or Sodium Chloride.)

Gralamin
2009-12-20, 12:27 AM
While possible, I think it's more likely that the astringent property is being hinted at here. Remember those Tom and Jerry cartoons, where Tom would accidentally get Alum on his mouth and cause it to shrink?
I dunno, I kinda like the image of everything blowing up, and then a complete lack of activity.



This article refers to the chemical classification Alum, rather than the trade name Alum, which is Potassium Alum (the one I linked.) In similar fashion, there are many chemicals that can be called salts, but the trade name Salt refers to a very specific one (i.e. Table Salt, or Sodium Chloride.)

This is what happens when I'm only half paying attention :smallredface:

golentan
2009-12-20, 12:39 AM
Darkvision: carrots improve your eyesight. The agate I'm not sure about.


Agate has a variety known as Eye agate.

Asbestos
2009-12-20, 01:00 AM
Well, alum and vinegar are bitter and sour respectively...
I was thinking OMG Painful and Sour. Hell, the 2nd definition of Vinegar http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/vinegar is "ill humor"

Random832
2009-12-20, 01:14 AM
Sorry to put a damper on the "infinite copper pieces" trick, but detect thoughts requires a focus component, not a material component. So there is exactly one copper piece in your component pouch, since it is never consumed by the spell.

Gentle Repose, on the other hand, uses copper pieces as material components.

Asbestos
2009-12-20, 01:16 AM
Suggestion needs a snake tongue and honey.

Fireball makes you a chimp.

Everyone points out that Fireball involves bat poop, but have you ever stopped to wonder why?
Bat Guano and Sulfur contain two of the three components of Black Powder, the third being Charcoal. Potassium Nitrate (the oxidizing agent of Black Powder) was historically collected from bat guano and feces/urine in general, bat caves are just excellent sources of old, piled up poop.

Dixieboy
2009-12-20, 01:18 AM
Gentle Repose, on the other hand, uses copper pieces as material components.

Still, you'd need an awful amount of dead things.

Though i guess seeing as you are adventurers that won't be a problem.

Random832
2009-12-20, 01:29 AM
The spell description of summon component (CM 118) does not specify that the components must in fact be used to cast a spell. In fact, the acknowledgement of what happens if they are not implies that they may not be. It also notably does not limit the total value of components summoned, nor the total number, and gentle repose does not have a theoretical limit on the number of eyes the corpse may have.

Wait a minute... being able to summon an arbitrarily large number of copper pieces has serious combat potential, too.

herrhauptmann
2009-12-20, 02:06 AM
Wait a minute... being able to summon an arbitrarily large number of copper pieces has serious combat potential, too.

If you're a Meowth using payday.

Optimystik
2009-12-20, 02:14 AM
Everyone points out that Fireball involves bat poop, but have you ever stopped to wonder why?
Bat Guano and Sulfur contain two of the three components of Black Powder, the third being Charcoal. Potassium Nitrate (the oxidizing agent of Black Powder) was historically collected from bat guano and feces/urine in general, bat caves are just excellent sources of old, piled up poop.

I'm aware, but there's no reason the spell couldn't have just called for sulfur. And Fireball isn't the only poop (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/foxsCunning.htm) powered (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/owlswisdom.htm) spell (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/spells/Bullsstrength.htm) either.

Now Bull's Strength I can kind of understand - iron COULD get in there, especially if the bull in question had hemorrhoids - but I wasn't aware Owls and Foxes stored their brain power in their bowels. This is why I like psionics.

Random thought: Was there a specific reason Cat's Grace doesn't have wizards digging through the litterbox when the other three buffs in the "Animal's X" line do? Is it just that cat poop really stinks so badly that even Boccob/Mystra felt moved to intercede and waive the requirement? It's not like Fresh Step features prominently in the A&E Guide, after all.


If you're a Meowth using payday.

Or a Samurai using !Gil Toss (though I prefer the untranslated terminology, Zeninage :smalltongue:)

erikun
2009-12-20, 02:17 AM
Wait a minute... being able to summon an arbitrarily large number of copper pieces has serious combat potential, too.
Enchant it onto an item? Congratulations, you've just created a Decanter of Endles Coinage. You really can make your problems go away by throwing money at it!

Haven
2009-12-20, 02:25 AM
The spell description of summon component (CM 118) does not specify that the components must in fact be used to cast a spell. In fact, the acknowledgement of what happens if they are not implies that they may not be. It also notably does not limit the total value of components summoned, nor the total number, and gentle repose does not have a theoretical limit on the number of eyes the corpse may have.

Wait a minute... being able to summon an arbitrarily large number of copper pieces has serious combat potential, too.

Weirdly, the first place my mind went was "So...are there any spells that need babies as material components?" I guess because I wanted this (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WaveOfBabies) to happen.

taltamir
2009-12-20, 02:52 AM
I'm sure you could find a use for 1600 pounds of copper.

Copper floor tiling + Levitate + Shocking Grasp?

hopefully you would use a spell that isn't touch attack.


Enchant it onto an item? Congratulations, you've just created a Decanter of Endles Coinage. You really can make your problems go away by throwing money at it!

now that is just hillarious... especially when put into gyser mode... that would actually be quite a weapon.

PS... I remember being told that in 1e, casting grase involved using lard, and the player was supposed to making a motion as if dropping a bowl of lard and say "whoops".

sofawall
2009-12-20, 02:54 AM
Or a Samurai using !Gil Toss (though I prefer the untranslated terminology, Zeninage :smalltongue:)

I had FF5 for GBA, and I had no idea what Zeninage was. It did good damage to all enemies, so I used it all the time for my Samurai.

Boy, was I surprised when I got to the next shop...

Fortuna
2009-12-20, 03:27 AM
One of my favourite jokes in third edition was in the Expanded Psionics handbook, in the powers section.

They printed Deja Vu in its correct place, then printed a few other powers... and then reprinted Deja Vu, word for word.

<3
Sorry to the original poster of this, but I couldn't resist

Also, on a less spammy note, it took me literally years to get some of the jokes of the old (1e) material components. They all made me laugh, though.

infinitypanda
2009-12-20, 03:34 AM
Okay, so there I was, right? Just got this new splatbook, **** was so cash. Been pretty excited about it for a long time. I mean, come on. These suckers are $35 a piece! I can't exactly just go and grab one whenever the mood takes me.

So I'm looking through the book. Just browsing, you know? Looking at the new base classes, the new skills and feats and such. Just kind of regular ways of getting to know the new book, and all that. Pretty much what anyone would do in my situation.

And then it hits me. There was an ability in there, Deja vu. It was PRINTED TWICE. I immediately fell out of my chair laughing, breaking my neck in the process. They say that on lonely nights, you can still my voice, laughing gently in the wind...

The_Snark
2009-12-20, 04:39 AM
Wow, the Deja Vu joke is really being beaten to death here. Reminds me of this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2eUopy9sd8

sofawall
2009-12-20, 04:43 AM
Wow, the Deja Vu joke is really being beaten to death here. Reminds me of this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G2eUopy9sd8

Can we please stop making Deja Vu jokes now?

Haven
2009-12-20, 04:52 AM
Can we please stop making Deja Vu jokes now?

You can say that again! Sorry.

Fortuna
2009-12-20, 05:06 AM
Can we stop making Deja Vu jokes now?

sofawall
2009-12-20, 05:12 AM
Can we stop making Deja Vu jokes now?

May the fleas of one thousand camels infest your nether regions.

PhoenixRivers
2009-12-20, 05:14 AM
Can we stop making Deja Vu jokes now?

You can say that again!

Fortuna
2009-12-20, 05:18 AM
Can...

*looks around*

Ah. Right. Sorry, got a bit carried away there. Please don't lynch me.

Kurald Galain
2009-12-20, 05:35 AM
I love the art for the Invisible Stalker in the 2E monster manual. There's even a separate entry for it in the credits listing.

Beelzebub1111
2009-12-20, 05:37 AM
Not quite as funny as the Elder Brain's +8 disguise. Because it gave birth to Sir Brian Consumpington.

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-20, 05:43 AM
Weirdly, the first place my mind went was "So...are there any spells that need babies as material components?" I guess because I wanted this (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/WaveOfBabies) to happen.

There is a spell that requires humanoid brains.

And as there's no listed gp cost...

(It's Awaken Construct, by the way. Oddly, it's not [Evi], even though it requires you to apparently rob a fresh grave or just murder someone.)

Aquillion
2009-12-20, 05:56 AM
Technically, Genius Loci do get a benefit from their 5 ranks in Jump.

By having 5 ranks in Jump, they get +2 to their Tumble checks. Naturally. :smallwink:

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-20, 06:01 AM
They don't have five ranks in Jump. Their untrained Jump checks are +5 because of their insane Strength score and pitifully low speed.

They're mindless. They don't have skill points.

Foryn Gilnith
2009-12-20, 08:18 AM
Wow, the Deja Vu joke is really being beaten to death here. Reminds me of this...

What a shame. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAlPx7ll7kA&feature=related)

Brutus
2009-12-20, 10:31 AM
I think Bull's Strength needs a pinch of dung because it's obviously B.S.

;D

InaVegt
2009-12-20, 10:41 AM
There is a spell that requires humanoid brains.

And as there's no listed gp cost...

(It's Awaken Construct, by the way. Oddly, it's not [Evi], even though it requires you to apparently rob a fresh grave or just murder someone.)

Goblins/Orcs/Kobolds are humanoid too.

Yuki Akuma
2009-12-20, 11:05 AM
Goblins/Orcs/Kobolds are humanoid too.

I'm pretty sure it's still evil to harvest the brain of a dead orc.

deuxhero
2009-12-20, 11:23 AM
(It's Awaken Construct, by the way. Oddly, it's not [Evi], even though it requires you to apparently rob a fresh grave or just murder someone.)

Because nothing stops you from harvesting it from one of the guys you have been mugging stopping from robbing travelers?

taltamir
2009-12-20, 01:50 PM
well, its the brain of an EVIL humanoid obviously... so killing it and taking it to use as spell components is obviously ok...

besides, you have an arbitrarily high amount of those in your spell component pouch anyways.

Foryn Gilnith
2009-12-20, 01:58 PM
Dominate Person isn't [evil]. What's your point citing Awaken Construct?

Also, neither Sanctify the Wicked nor Programmed Amnesia are [evil].

Nehh
2009-12-20, 02:24 PM
So yeah. Apparently, a spell component pouch is the next best thing to have in a zombie outbreak. Just get a humanoid brain and throw it in the opposite direction to yourself. Best zombie distraction evar.

Edit: You can say that again.

Aquillion
2009-12-21, 02:42 AM
Also, neither Sanctify the Wicked nor Programmed Amnesia are [evil].I've always been fond of the fact that Programmed Amnesia is not evil, but Mindrape is, even though the only real difference between the spells is the name and casting time.

"OH MY GOD, you mindraped her! You vile monster!"

"Please, please, I would never do something so horrible. That was Programmed Amnesia."

"Oh. Oh. Well, in that case it's all right."

PlzBreakMyCmpAn
2009-12-21, 03:25 AM
This thread is made of fail... and win... at the same time.

drengnikrafe
2009-12-21, 04:40 AM
I've always been fond of the fact that Programmed Amnesia is not evil, but Mindrape is, even though the only real difference between the spells is the name and casting time.

"OH MY GOD, you mindraped her! You vile monster!"

"Please, please, I would never do something so horrible. That was Programmed Amnesia."

"Oh. Oh. Well, in that case it's all right."

The way I always figured it worked was... With mindrape, their past and their mind and everything else is worth nothing to you, you just recreate what they are. On the other hand, programmed amnesia gives you enough time to understand the way they are, the way they feel, and why they are what they are.

That is to say, programmed amnesia lets you feel their pain with every change you make. Mindrape doesn't. The empathy somehow balances out the recreation of their very being.

Kris Strife
2009-12-21, 07:58 AM
Also, neither Sanctify the Wicked nor Programmed Amnesia are [evil].

Well, Sanctify the Wicked doesn't really overwrite their personality or anything. Its more like Ghost Rider's Penance Stare than anything else.

Optimystik
2009-12-21, 08:02 AM
Consider Sanctify the Wicked as the one perfect argument that would convince anyone with the capacity for good (i.e. not [Evil] subtype) of the error of their ways. D&D operates on the assumption that such a perfect argument exists for everything with a soul, from dragons to mindflayers.

And unlike the other two spells, it takes a year and drains a level from the caster, who must be Exalted. I really don't see what's so bad about it. But I've been embroiled in this discussion many times before.

John Campbell
2009-12-21, 02:27 PM
I'm aware, but there's no reason the spell couldn't have just called for sulfur.

The 2E PHB called for both. I don't know what happened to the charcoal. Maybe they were worried about giving kids directions for making explosives along with the demon and pagan deity pr0n they were already getting flak for.

Lightning bolt requires glass or amber and a bit of fur.

Sleep is brought by a visit from the Sandman.

There were a bunch of others that I don't recall, and I'm away from my books this week. Note also that almost all of these date back to the TSR days; WotC just somehow failed to destroy them.

Optimystik
2009-12-21, 02:41 PM
Gaseous Form requires a wisp of smoke. Careful opening your pouch!
Secret Page needs herring scales - tricky.
Spider Climb needs bitumen - so that's how Spidey does it...
Genesis needs a crystal sphere - blank world indeed.

I don't get Rope Trick - what's the corn extract for? And Haste needs licorice root, is that a sugar-rush reference?

RebelRogue
2009-12-21, 03:54 PM
I don't get Rope Trick - what's the corn extract for? And Haste needs licorice root, is that a sugar-rush reference?
I'm pondering that myself. It's a starch (and a non-Newtonian liquid when added to water, but that seems a little far-fetched), so maybe it somehow stabilizes the twisted loop of parchment (I guess that's a Möbius strip to reinforce the weird geometry of extradimensional spaces).

As for other jokes, let's not forget Drawmij. I wonder what the original player of the character was named :smallbiggrin:

Cybren
2009-12-22, 12:26 PM
I'm pretty sure it's still evil to harvest the brain of a dead orc.

Why?
(1234)

Indon
2009-12-22, 01:34 PM
Unless you had the chance of studying the atomic structure of adamantium, mythril and enchanted metals, then you have no right to claim that oozes will nom nom trough any metal the adventurers may be wearing. In particular because we aren't even sure there's atoms in the D&D world. Cold iron is a rare expensive substance there after all.

According to the SRD, cold iron (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/specialMaterials.htm#ironCold) is not mere hammered but unworked iron, but iron from deep in the earth, 'forged at a lower temperature'.

So D&D cold iron is not normal cold iron.

Magnema
2009-12-22, 03:54 PM
This was probably not intentional, but is amusing:
Expanded Psionics Handbook, Page 4: "Races (Chapter 1): This chapter introduces four new psionic races: dromites, elans, half giants, maenads, and xephs.":smallannoyed::smallsigh::smallbiggrin:

Optimystik
2009-12-22, 04:11 PM
This was probably not intentional, but is amusing:
Expanded Psionics Handbook, Page 4: "Races (Chapter 1): This chapter introduces four new psionic races: dromites, elans, half giants, maenads, and xephs.":smallannoyed::smallsigh::smallbiggrin:

Well, half giants only count for half, and in D&D you round down. :smallwink:

taltamir
2009-12-22, 04:32 PM
I've always been fond of the fact that Programmed Amnesia is not evil, but Mindrape is, even though the only real difference between the spells is the name and casting time.

"OH MY GOD, you mindraped her! You vile monster!"

"Please, please, I would never do something so horrible. That was Programmed Amnesia."

"Oh. Oh. Well, in that case it's all right."

maybe mindrape involve chanelling "evil energy".
while programmed amnesia involves regular energy, but is usually an evil act to perform on someone.
[evil] does not mean actual evil... even officially... take for example WOTC's "succubus paladin" sample NPC. (she retains her [evil] and [chaotic] subtypes despite being lawful good.)

But really, that just gives them too much credit... WOTC knows jack about morality yet insists on creating a moral absolute system which they cannot even be consistent about... it is just sad and safe to ignore.

deuxhero
2009-12-22, 04:37 PM
Sorry...two there be. (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/psionic/classes/soulknife.htm)


I count a third (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/description.htm#alignment) and a fourth (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/races.htm#favoredClass)...

Colmarr
2009-12-22, 09:39 PM
Agate has a variety known as Eye agate.

More specifically, that variety is more commonly known as Cat's Eye Agate, which makes it a very fitting component for the Darkvision spell.


I love the art for the Invisible Stalker in the 2E monster manual. There's even a separate entry for it in the credits listing.

Now I never noticed the listing. That's the true joke, IMO.

taltamir
2009-12-22, 10:41 PM
I count a third (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/description.htm#alignment) and a fourth (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/races.htm#favoredClass)...

ha, I agree... especially funny is when they say it is a "tool to develop your character" and "not a straight jacket"... because really, putting "lawful good" makes your character so much more developed than it would have otherwise been...