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Lycan 01
2009-12-31, 01:55 AM
We've all been there. A dramatic moment you want to go perfectly, a make-or-break moment that a fight, quest, or even whole campaign hangs on, a save-or-die spell at an inopportune moment, or one of those random rolls you wouldn't normally worry about. And then it happens. You roll a 1. Or a 100, depending on the game. And, if you're really having one of those days, you roll badly on the "bad stuff/failure" table and things get even worse.

So... What happened? Tells us your story. Did that jump across a chasm result in you falling onto a nice pointy rock because of that infernal 1? Did you swing your sword, roll a 1, roll on the "failure" table, and end up chopping off your own head? Did you roll a 100 on a Sanity Check and tear out your own femur? Please, share your tales...


Sadly, I can't come up with anything off the top of my head.

Well... There was the time somebody tried to drop kick Pyramid Head during a Call of Cthulhu "Silent Hill" campaign I ran, and they ended up rolling a 100. All they got was a twisted ankle, of course. I would have done worse, but she started getting pissed at me for "picking on her" when the other players told her what a 100 usually meant, especially in such a situation. :smallannoyed:



So yeah... Who else has an "Epic Fail" moment? :smallbiggrin:

BobVosh
2009-12-31, 02:08 AM
Hmm. Really can't think of any for when I was a player. However as a DM I have had plenty. Silly dragons lodging themselves in crevices, etc. However I have had a shadow based creature in exalted. Rolled 4 fumbles, and he was charging to use a diaklave that could cut through anything. I had him cleave into the ground in accident and fall into the ground about half a mile.

FlamingKobold
2009-12-31, 02:11 AM
It was a 28th level Human Bard. He tried to be diplomatic. He didn't succeed. TPK ensued.

Lycanthromancer
2009-12-31, 02:18 AM
Silly dragons lodging themselves in crevices, etc.I'd make a crack about dragons being like dogs in heat and half-dragons being mongrel curs, but that would just be in poor taste.

Zeta Kai
2009-12-31, 02:19 AM
It was a 28th level Human Bard. He tried to be diplomatic. He didn't succeed. TPK ensued.

How does that happen?! A decent 28th-level Bard has a +31 to Diplomacy without items. Even on a natural 1, that's still enough to turn a hostile NPC to indifferent, an unfriendly NPC to friendly, or an indifferent NPC to helpful. Either the DM uses the auto-fail-on-a-1 for skill checks (a mechanically bad house-rule), or the DM just needed an excuse to kill the party.

Lycan 01
2009-12-31, 02:20 AM
So did the party win that encounter, or... what? :smallconfused:


Actually, a few weeks ago my new DnD group fought a young white dragon in a dormant volcano. They were at the top of the volcano, and two hunks of ice were restraining the slab of rock that was essentially a volcano cork. Well, they argued for many, many turns of what to do - destroy the ice, or fight the old fashioned way? I wanted them to destroy the ice and set off the volcano, since I had an awesome freefalling battle planned.

Well, after they decided to just fight it the old fashioned way, I knew I had to take action. 3 reasons. 1, too boring. 2, too much chance of death. 3, it would take too long. So... By random chance, the dragon ended up rolling a 1 to attack the sorcerer, who was standing next to the hunk of ice keeping the dragon's lair from exploding.

:smallbiggrin:

The Glyphstone
2009-12-31, 02:26 AM
What happens when you roll a 100 in CoC while drop-kicking Pyramid Head?

Lycanthromancer
2009-12-31, 02:29 AM
What happens when you roll a 100 in CoC while drop-kicking Pyramid Head?The same thing that happens when anyone tries drop-kicking Pyramid Head. [/Joss Whedon]

Jack_Banzai
2009-12-31, 02:59 AM
I played 3.5 for a very long time and experienced a rush of unluck with the Jump skill that is beyond belief. Seriously. Whenever it came to a real make-or-break moment that involved Jump, I was doomed to fail.

Example: Standing on a balcony overlooking the coronation of the new Queen, I spy a group of assassins entering the throne room via an antechamber. Shouting an alarm, I grab a nearby tapestry, yank it free of the wall, swing down... roll a 1... and my face skids along the floor. How heroic.

Example: Perched on the back of a druid shapechanged into a pterodactyl, I stab it then attempt to jump from its plummeting corpse to a nearby treetop. I roll a 1. I fall 150 feet.

Example: Chasing the ringleader of a group of kidnappers across the Sharn rooftops and trailing by about 90 feet, I am dismayed to see the villain step onto an airship which then lifts off. I hurl myself off the rooftop, hundreds of feet above the city streets, in an attempt to grab a guyline. I roll a 1 - and a new character.

Lycanthromancer
2009-12-31, 03:10 AM
<Jump Checks>A level 10 character with a 14 Str and a 30 ft movement speed can jump 16 feet on a nat 1 and a running start. Without a running start, he can jump 8 feet.

Did you have no ranks at all?

Crow
2009-12-31, 03:18 AM
Jump, Swim, and Climb.

That fateful trio of skills that you hardly ever need. But when you do, need them BADLY.

Fenlun
2009-12-31, 03:20 AM
I delivered the killing blow to a Purple Worm as it shot itself out of the ground as a 3.5 Wizard, and while bragging about my magical prowess to our parties Fighter (V style) the worms' body came back down and crushed my frail mage body...:smalleek:

SethFahad
2009-12-31, 03:29 AM
A Warlock in our campaign, possesed with a fiend of possession followed the command to attack and kill a 14year old beggar-boy to satisfy the fiend.

He went to the dark muddy alley and approached the boy.

He rolled natural 1 followed by a bad dex roll. Three times. In a row.

He ended up with a twisted ankle, serious damage, no running, and checks every time he moved. (failure=prone).

The boy called for help, the guards came. He couldn't run away. So the full-of-mud crippled warlock got arrested. (Plus he was punished by the fiend.)

We LOAO... :smallbiggrin:

Optimystik
2009-12-31, 03:29 AM
Jump, Swim, and Climb.

That fateful trio of skills that you hardly ever need. But when you do, need them BADLY.

You could just be a wizard or druid...:smalltongue:

AslanCross
2009-12-31, 03:54 AM
Eyes of the Lich Queen.
I was playing as a warforged warblade. Against the boss at the end of the first chapter, a half-dragon mummy, I fail my Will save vs. its Despair aura. Since I was flat-footed, I couldn't use Moment of Perfect Mind.

Warblade spends the rest of the very quick encounter in a BSOD state.

Then I recall after the fact that while warforged aren't immune to fear, they are immune to paralysis. <_< Oh well.

Jack_Banzai
2009-12-31, 07:51 AM
A level 10 character with a 14 Str and a 30 ft movement speed can jump 16 feet on a nat 1 and a running start. Without a running start, he can jump 8 feet.

Did you have no ranks at all?

Sure I did, but the DCs for a lot of the more heroic moves I've made were pretty high - usually I'm willing to risk my neck for dramatic flair. Don't get me wrong, I made plenty of Jump checks. There's a difference between a running long jump between two rooftops - cake - and a standing long jump from the back of a falling pterodactyl to a treetop.

comicshorse
2009-12-31, 08:13 AM
Star Trek game, we were playing a Federation Intelligence unit on long term deep cover as a dodgy trading vessel.
My character had a ring on his index finger which was a disguised one-shot heavy stunner.
Anyway my character had arranged a meeting in a sleazy bar with a weapons trader we were trying to nab. I'm sitting there when a hoooded figure comes over and sits at my table. He pushes back his hood to reveal a Klingon mercenary we had arrested some time back.
I tell the G.M. I'm aiming my ring-weapon at him under the table.
He leans forward and whispers " I've been looking forward to this for a long time "
Unable to resist the feed line, I grin back and say " I bet you have" and shoot him.
I roll a natural 100. G.M. rules my hand is touching the underside of the table when I fire the blast goes straight into the table. I take half the damage fail my CON roll and pass out.
The Klingon shrugs in confusion as I twitch in fornt of him and then pass outs, shrugs, slings me over his shoulder and leaves the bar

Choco
2009-12-31, 09:58 AM
I have been playing D&D since 3.0 came out, and NOT ONCE during that entire time have I ever succeeded in a trip attack as a player. While I never had a tripper build, the many times I have tried to trip as a barbarian or other melee class I have always failed horribly.

I permanently gave up on tripping when my badass Conan-esque barbarian not only failed his trip check against a venerable wizard but then also failed the next check when the wizard responded with is own trip attempt. Yes, my barbarian failed to trip and was then tripped by a venerable wizard. What pride that character had about his physical abilities died that day. Luckily the rest of the party picked up my slack and won the fight easily.

Tyndmyr
2009-12-31, 09:58 AM
So, after a long, horribly railroaded experience, people start walking on this magic rune to port out of the area. Im last, cause Im the paranoid wizard, and everything has gone wrong so far in DM fiatland.

I should mention that everyone has exactly 1 hp due to the previous deathtrap, except for me. I have the only remaining wand of CLW, with one charge left.

On the other side of the teleport, there is a lightening bolt spell turret. I have no idea of this, since our characters have no communication, and all info is being distributed via notes. Since they all land in the same place, each consecutive lightening bolt also hits the previous fallen bodies. Obviously, everyone but the last guy before me is dead as a result, and he's deep into negatives.

Thankfully, I walk through with a readied standard action, and countered it. I pull off the heal to save the still living monk, look at the dead bodies of the rest of the party, and do the logical thing...turn the bags of holding inside out to see what they've got. The blackguard carries a rubber ball with a sepia snake sigil on it.

I laugh and announce that it doesn't matter, since it's a will save. Im safe unless I roll a one. You know what the dice did to me when I said that. Not only did I get the nat 1, I maxed the duration.

bosssmiley
2009-12-31, 10:48 AM
What happens when you roll a 100 in CoC while drop-kicking Pyramid Head?

HPL turns in his grave. :smallamused:

RandomNPC
2009-12-31, 12:50 PM
ya know i just posted this story in another thread last night, something about do you screw up character plans or let them go. But this story needs told again.

So the party has been ripping apart the evil army of the BBEG and its up to the lich BBEG to go get his own tribute, because everyone who works for him is now permadead. so the party assassin hides near the drop off for the tribute, and starts to study the lich as soon as he gets within range. Hide checks were made, attacks were rolled, damage was dealt, and when it came to the death attack effect of the assassin i picked up the MM and read the part about how death effects work on Mr. Lich.

It's not my fault the party spent two hours debating on what kind of ambush to set.

Saintjebus
2009-12-31, 12:58 PM
In the last RPGA game that I played, my insane drow sorceror tried to leap onto a monster in a pool of sewage. He missed. Landed in the Sewage. sank underneath the sewage.... face to face with another monster. The drow attempts to bite the monster(he has a vampiric bite attack) and misses. The monster... bites back. Only a godly intimidate check from inside the creatures mouth, followed by an incredibly lucky death saving throw saved me.

Seatbelt
2009-12-31, 01:15 PM
After finding these forums and reading Logic Ninja's guide to being batman, I thought I'd show my group what an optimized wizard looked like. I rolled a gnome illusionist. He was the most useless character ever. Nobody ever failed a save (the DM even apologized for rolling amazingly well against me), even with spell penetration and some bonuses to beat SR I could never pierce spell resistance. The group constantly berated me for not being a blaster. I was a sad panda.

Since then we've all become better players. In our longest campaign I played a mechanically strong cleric/ordained champion (I pwned an iron golem so hard the DM threw another at us just because and I rocked that too). In the same encounter, immediately after the first hit the ground. I pwned that one too.) and when he died I made an even stronger gish character who actually literally pissed off the DM because he couldn't handle me (I felt bad).


So for our pathfinder campaign I made a very flavorful gnome bard, thinking I'd be support and roleplay and be less awesome so the party could shine. Unfortunately nobody communicated with anyone else and we all made interesting characters with a strong mechanical flaw of some sort or another (please don't Stormwind Fallacy me). The DM crafted the campaign expecting our usual Ultimate Power characters. We struggled through every encounter and finally got murdered when we tried to ambush some drow.

Tadanori Oyama
2009-12-31, 01:23 PM
My choice to play a Dark Pact Warlock in a 4E D&D game a few months ago. Low level characters, like level 3 low. Dark Pact Warlocks have the option, on some of their powers, to take hit points from allied characters and buff their spells. Since it's forth edition our character had what I thought was plenty of hit points. I spent alot of time standing nearby the Minotaur Fighter, in case I needed to borrow a little life for a quick boost.

I was also the party face because my class was Charisma based. In the process of underground exploration we can to a difficult to reach section of a tomb. Reaching this place called for some climbing, which neither I nor the Cleric managed to do very well at first and we each lost a Surge to falling damage. Inside the tomb we where attacked by a combination of goblin zombies, a hobogoblin wright, and a formless ghost.

I spread my curses around, attempting to place one on each creature so that I could do maximum damage with my Curse Bite power while dancing around the Fighter to allow him to defend. The Cleric ran off to one side and more or less wasted her Turn Undead use for the encounter.

We drove off the ghost and destoryed one of the zombies, making it an "even" fight of three on three. The wright's ability to attack Surges directly put me at zero Surges before too long, a bad place to be, and the Cleric was forced to get the Fighter and herself healed, using the majority of her healing power.

So, knowing we needed to end this fight last round, I moved next to the Fighter and used my big gun spell against the wright. Doing this sucked five hit points out of the Fighter, leaving him with eight. I rolled a three on my attack roll, which missed by two after the buff I got from sucking out the Fighter's HP. My half damage on a miss failed to destory the wright.

At that point the ghost returned, rising out of the floor on the other side of the Fighter from me. The Fighter took his op attack, hit, did half damage because the ghost was insubstancial, and then got hit for eight hit points by the ghost.

Brought to exactly zero hit points Fighter dropped and I got rushed by zombies and the wright. The Cleric, who had been lasering from behind us, decided to cut her losses and jumped down the hole that we'd come up to get to the tomb.

So, I helped drop the Fighter and didn't even manage to kill the creature I wanted to hurt.

Crow
2009-12-31, 01:56 PM
You could just be a wizard or druid...:smalltongue:

Yes, but then they didn't need them did they?

taltamir
2009-12-31, 02:29 PM
I played 3.5 for a very long time and experienced a rush of unluck with the Jump skill that is beyond belief. Seriously. Whenever it came to a real make-or-break moment that involved Jump, I was doomed to fail.

Example: Standing on a balcony overlooking the coronation of the new Queen, I spy a group of assassins entering the throne room via an antechamber. Shouting an alarm, I grab a nearby tapestry, yank it free of the wall, swing down... roll a 1... and my face skids along the floor. How heroic.

Example: Perched on the back of a druid shapechanged into a pterodactyl, I stab it then attempt to jump from its plummeting corpse to a nearby treetop. I roll a 1. I fall 150 feet.

Example: Chasing the ringleader of a group of kidnappers across the Sharn rooftops and trailing by about 90 feet, I am dismayed to see the villain step onto an airship which then lifts off. I hurl myself off the rooftop, hundreds of feet above the city streets, in an attempt to grab a guyline. I roll a 1 - and a new character.

in all three cases, a ring of featherfall (2200gp) would have saved you.. Or just 1 level in wizard / sorc and having it prepared/known.

rule #1: Always have featerfall ready :)

Lycan 01
2010-01-01, 10:59 PM
What happens when you roll a 100 in CoC while drop-kicking Pyramid Head?

Pyramid Head simply sidesteps you and the momentum sends you flying forward off balance, and you land on the side of the street with a sickening crunch as your foot twists the wrong way.


He wasn't trying to actively kill them at that point. He was just trying to psyche 'em out. At least until they shot him... Then he got pissed. :smallamused:




Oh! I just remembered one!


Okay, so in one of my old DnD groups, there was a Paladin and a Warlock. A few other people came and went, but it was usually these two guys. Well, they were like level 3 or so, and they went to clear out a goblin camp in the woods. They ended up doing hit and run tactics, with the Halfling Warlock lighting fires to distract the guards while the Human Paladin sniped them with a crossbow he'd had since day 1 but had never actually used. Well, the modifiers for the crossbow ended up being pretty crazy, since he was concealed, he had the high ground, the enemy was distracted, and he was aiming with both hands... No shot missed, and he fell in love with it quickly.

So the Paladin and Warlock kill most of the guards, and make a break for the center of the camp to find the leader of this warband. Two heavily armed guards come running towards them - the Warlock starts blasting one with ranged attacks, and the Paladin decides that since it hasn't failed him yet, he wants to get a few hits in with the crossbow before the goblin bodyguard gets to him.

He rolled a 1.

So, I asked him to roll the D20 again, to see how badly he failed. I figured the lower he did, the worse he failed. If he rolled high, he'd just miss or something.

He rolled another 1.

We're all like :smalleek: at this point. I tell him to roll again, and when I go to hand him the dice, it drops from my hand, rolls across the table, and stops right in front of him on a 1. He quickly grabs it and screams in terror that it doesn't count, and he rolls again for himself. He rolled a 10 or so, IIRC.

The result?

The crossbow exploded. Overuse had strained the mechanism, and when he fired, the taught cord snapped loose and lashed out wildly. Splinters and blood flew everywhere, and the Paladin was horrified to see all the fingers on his left hand twirling through the air. He had to fight with penalties for the rest of that small encounter, but afterwards he used his Lay on Hands power to reattach his fingers. Although, in his rush... he put his pinky on backwards. :smallamused:

TheCountAlucard
2010-01-01, 11:38 PM
One time my 3.5 party went plane-hopping, and landed amidst a battle of barbarians. On the very first round, a barbarian hurls a throwing axe at the Healer. I rolled a nat 20 on the attack roll, and pointed this out to the PCs. I rolled to confirm, and it was a second nat 20. The party was not amused. "All right, guys," I said, "you roll."

Nat 20.

The Healer drops from a hatchet to the skull.

Of course, three hours later, the party learned that those who die in Ysgard revive in the morning. That lightened their moods a bit.

Swordgleam
2010-01-01, 11:41 PM
I could explain in full. Or I could just share the immortal words that will forever bring to mind this story, and should paint a relatively adequate picture of what happened: "Are you wearing a helmet?"

Milskidasith
2010-01-01, 11:54 PM
I delivered the killing blow to a Purple Worm as it shot itself out of the ground as a 3.5 Wizard, and while bragging about my magical prowess to our parties Fighter (V style) the worms' body came back down and crushed my frail mage body...:smalleek:

I don't think the DM fiating to kill you counts as a failure.


Pyramid Head simply sidesteps you and the momentum sends you flying forward off balance, and you land on the side of the street with a sickening crunch as your foot twists the wrong way.


He wasn't trying to actively kill them at that point. He was just trying to psyche 'em out. At least until they shot him... Then he got pissed. :smallamused:




Oh! I just remembered one!


Okay, so in one of my old DnD groups, there was a Paladin and a Warlock. A few other people came and went, but it was usually these two guys. Well, they were like level 3 or so, and they went to clear out a goblin camp in the woods. They ended up doing hit and run tactics, with the Halfling Warlock lighting fires to distract the guards while the Human Paladin sniped them with a crossbow he'd had since day 1 but had never actually used. Well, the modifiers for the crossbow ended up being pretty crazy, since he was concealed, he had the high ground, the enemy was distracted, and he was aiming with both hands... No shot missed, and he fell in love with it quickly.

So the Paladin and Warlock kill most of the guards, and make a break for the center of the camp to find the leader of this warband. Two heavily armed guards come running towards them - the Warlock starts blasting one with ranged attacks, and the Paladin decides that since it hasn't failed him yet, he wants to get a few hits in with the crossbow before the goblin bodyguard gets to him.

He rolled a 1.

So, I asked him to roll the D20 again, to see how badly he failed. I figured the lower he did, the worse he failed. If he rolled high, he'd just miss or something.

He rolled another 1.

We're all like :smalleek: at this point. I tell him to roll again, and when I go to hand him the dice, it drops from my hand, rolls across the table, and stops right in front of him on a 1. He quickly grabs it and screams in terror that it doesn't count, and he rolls again for himself. He rolled a 10 or so, IIRC.

The result?

The crossbow exploded. Overuse had strained the mechanism, and when he fired, the taught cord snapped loose and lashed out wildly. Splinters and blood flew everywhere, and the Paladin was horrified to see all the fingers on his left hand twirling through the air. He had to fight with penalties for the rest of that small encounter, but afterwards he used his Lay on Hands power to reattach his fingers. Although, in his rush... he put his pinky on backwards. :smallamused:

And using houserules for crit failures show up. I should have known.

Lycan 01
2010-01-02, 12:08 AM
And using houserules for crit failures show up. I should have known.

I'm sorry? :smallconfused: What's wrong with adding a little bit of flavor to the game? We decided it'd make it easier to make up what the failure was if we had something to gauge it with. He just happened to roll a 1, and they decided to go with it. So if there's a problem there, me and my players didn't see it...

Milskidasith
2010-01-02, 12:19 AM
I'm sorry? :smallconfused: What's wrong with adding a little bit of flavor to the game? We decided it'd make it easier to make up what the failure was if we had something to gauge it with. He just happened to roll a 1, and they decided to go with it. So if there's a problem there, me and my players didn't see it...

Crit failures are always posted in these kind of topics. I wasn't specifying anything wrong with them (though I do believe they are incredibly unfair for the PCs and generally make no sense at all, and detract from the flavor in any game that's even remotely serious), just that, that particular homebrew is ubiquitous. Any time there's a topic about any kind of failure, there's always the story of rolling three ones in a row and cutting your head off because your hand exploded and the force of the shockwave knocked you into a nearby imaginary ghost turtle that spontaneously grew a bladed shell, or something equally absurd.

Lycan 01
2010-01-02, 12:33 AM
Well, the thread is about crit failures, sooo... That's the sort of story I'd expect to see here. :smallconfused:


If it makes you feel any better, my new group doesn't use the "exploding 20s/exploding 1" houserules... Then again, I've never run the idea by them, so they might love it or hate it for all I know. :smalltongue:

Kris Strife
2010-01-02, 12:37 AM
Well, the thread is about crit failures, sooo... That's the sort of story I'd expect to see here. :smallconfused:

Well, its not just a houserule, what happens is a DM fiat, kind of like being crushed to death by a falling purple worm.

Lycan 01
2010-01-02, 12:43 AM
Well, its not just a houserule, what happens is a DM fiat, kind of like being crushed to death by a falling purple worm.

Okay, that one was just unfair. I would never just kill a player becaue I was feeling vindictive about them killing the boss.

I've been on the recieving end of an unfair DM fiat. Wasn't fun. :smallannoyed:

On the plus side, I can honestly say I'm the only one here who's character set off a nuke by lighting mushrooms on fire. But again, that wasn't a crit failure, just an unfair DM fiat...

Serpentine
2010-01-02, 12:45 AM
And using houserules for crit failures show up. I should have known.And it made for an interesting story, who'd've known. Kinda hard to have interesting stories about failure when it's impossible to fail very hard...

Let's see. My story, the details of which I'm a bit sketchy so I'll have to fill up some bits with what I think happened, started out with a bad decision by a pretty bad player: Have his 18 Str Elf Wizard march out in front of the party in monster-infested sewers. At one point, he marched straight into a trapped gelatinous cube. Kept on marching ahead, though, and came face-to-face with a thingamabob Mouther. You know the one, with the eyes and mouths. Blank on its name right now. So, it went something like this:

Wizard did something not terribly interesting.
My character, half-orc Rogue/Catlord, attempted to hit it, natural 1, hit the Wizard instead.
Elf Rogue moved into position.
Elf Cleric did something not terribly interesting.
Mouther used its Confusion ability. My Catlord failed.
Wizard did something.
Catlord, confused, whaked the Wizard again.
Rogue attacks... fumbles. Skewers the Wizard. Wizard falls, below -10.
Cleric's turn next, I think possibly on the same initiative, so I DM fiat that he can lunge forward and heal the Wizard as he gives his death rattle.

I had another character, a 3/4 elf/1/4 succubus non-magical Ranger, who, despite having maxed-out Survival, was incapable of succeeding on a Survival check to not get lost. At one point, she was feeding us one minute and driving us further into the forest the next. Terrible sense of direction, she had.

That's all I can think of at the moment.

Kris Strife
2010-01-02, 12:46 AM
Okay, that one was just unfair. I would never just kill a player becaue I was feeling vindictive about them killing the boss.

I've been on the recieving end of an unfair DM fiat. Wasn't fun. :smallannoyed:

On the plus side, I can honestly say I'm the only one here who's character set off a nuke by lighting mushrooms on fire. But again, that wasn't a crit failure, just an unfair DM fiat...

I was using the purple worm thing as an example of an unfair DM fiat, not accusing you.

Though any use of Rule 0 is technically a DM fiat.

StoryKeeper
2010-01-02, 12:50 AM
My sorcerer had a staff of fireballs, and the party was navigating its way through the underdark. Everyone else in the party had some means of seeing in the dark except my sorcerer. When the bad guys started approaching us in teh darkness, I decide to shoot a fireball into the darkness. Between my character's blindness and my misunderstanding the board, I wound up shooting a solid rock just ten feet away. Everyone in the party makes a reflex save, and half of them had evasion leaving everyone either unscathed or only slightly harmed. Everyone, that is, except for my sorcerer who rolled a big, fat 1. FWOOSH!

Serpentine
2010-01-02, 12:51 AM
I don't think it was necessarily a DM fiat, though it may well have been. Personally, I would have randomly rolled the direction in which the body fell, and given the victim a chance for a spot check and, if succeeded, a Reflex save. Unless the victim was really, really involved in his boasting - in which case I'd still probably give him a Spot check but with a penalty - and/or it would've been funny :smalltongue: But with the latter, I think I probably wouldn't have killed him. Just maimed :smallwink:

edit @ ^: I once played with an idiot. Seriously, this guy was a fool. The player, mind, not the character. His character was actually meant to be a genius, 18+ int and all that. So this is very much Player Fail.
He once got a shiny new staff. He didn't know what it did, so he waved it around a bit. BOOM. Turns out it's a Staff of Fireballs. Fortunately his experimental wave didn't hit anyone. Of course, then he started twirling it around, with fellow characters standing right next to him. The DM asked for an Int check, then decreed that his character was clever enough to know that it was a bad idea. Not a particularly good bit of DMing, probably, but oh well.
Then, later, we came up against a ginormous red dragon. Considering the fact that we were around level 15 and she'd previously thought that we'd have trouble with a bunch of stirges, retrospectively we probably could've taken this thing on, but we didn't know that at the time (first game ever). So, we were face-to-face with a great big cranky mummy dragon we were sure was gonna nom us. We spent a while trying to convince it not to do so, when this exchange occured:
Red Dragon: IGNORANCE IS NO EXCUSE.
Idiot Wizard: Well I don't know about that, but...
At that point, the Rogue considered slitting his throat and making an offering of him. I think he gave him a sap to the skull, instead. Then he got a natural 20 on a Bluff check to convince the dragon that an even bigger, tougher, meaner Gold or Silver dragon was about to turn up, causing it to seek a safer nest. Then said Good dragon did turn up, which was interesting...

Lycan 01
2010-01-02, 12:54 AM
I was using the purple worm thing as an example of an unfair DM fiat, not accusing you.

Though any use of Rule 0 is technically a DM fiat.

But... Isn't the DM's job supposed to be to make stuff up, explain how the rolls translate into actions, and otherwise tell the story? Or am I not supposed to say where the attacks land or how badly a hit rattles them, and random stuff like that? :smalleek:

Kris Strife
2010-01-02, 12:58 AM
But... Isn't the DM's job supposed to be to make stuff up, explain how the rolls translate into actions, and otherwise tell the story? Or am I not supposed to say where the attacks land or how badly a hit rattles them, and random stuff like that? :smalleek:

Descriptions and story aren't uses of rule 0. Telling them that 'You are stunned for two rounds from the force of that blow to the head' when theres no reason why the attack would stun them by RAW is rule 0. Yes it would make sense in real life, but its not a basic rule of D&D.

Milskidasith
2010-01-02, 01:01 AM
But... Isn't the DM's job supposed to be to make stuff up, explain how the rolls translate into actions, and otherwise tell the story? Or am I not supposed to say where the attacks land or how badly a hit rattles them, and random stuff like that? :smalleek:

Those things aren't the kind of DM fiat people complain about. It's the "I killed the purple worm boss, decide to brag to the (presumably ineffective) barbarian, and then my DM got ticked at me and had the worm land on me and kill me" kind of fiat people don't like.

As a side note, there would be rules for that kind of thing... the worm would make a jump check for how high it went (well, kind of DM fiat, but it's falling object damage, so we might as well know how high the object is), make an attack roll against AC 5 to land on the wizard's square (assuming it was aiming there, anyway), and the wizard would make a DC 15 reflex save to take no damage. Granted, that is kind of fiat-y, since I'm extrapolating falling object damage for explicitly aimed objects to a flying worm corpse, but it's better than "I don't like your bragging, you're crushed lol."

Serpentine
2010-01-02, 01:04 AM
I would like to point out, again, that there's nothing in the story to indicate that the DM in question did not go through something like that process. Or perhaps he had already decided the direction in which the worm would fall, expecting the characters to look for that and get out of the way before stopping to brag - no character common sense action, no character chance.

Milskidasith
2010-01-02, 01:24 AM
I would like to point out, again, that there's nothing in the story to indicate that the DM in question did not go through something like that process. Or perhaps he had already decided the direction in which the worm would fall, expecting the characters to look for that and get out of the way before stopping to brag - no character common sense action, no character chance.

Saying "You were too busy talking to notice the fact the sun was blocked out and the work you were just killing was falling towards you" is still DM fiat.

Serpentine
2010-01-02, 01:30 AM
So what? More to the point, that was just one of several possibilities. I really think you're picking on this one story WAY too much, and reading far too much into it. Seriously, give that poor DM a break. It's something I'd be happy to at least have a chance of happening in my game, and I know my players would just think it was a funny story.

AngelisBlack
2010-01-02, 01:53 AM
As a DM, I witnessed this failure of tactics. Party vs 2 drow clerics. Party rouge is already invisible and tries to get into position. Enemy Clerics use darkness, Party cleric throws an area dispel that manages to fail at dispelling the 2 darkness spells but does manage to decloak the rogue. Rogue gets hit with a Bestow Curse because of this, and as he retreats the clerics start blocking off the hallway with summons. End result is a party retreat before they even secured the first room of the dungeon [the hallway to the room doesn't count.]

AirGuitarGod32
2010-01-02, 02:01 AM
Does this sound like a DM screw?

I was a Human Fighter, and was in a decent party. HOWEVER, when the Mummy Purple Worm turned all but the two warforged into slobbering idiots, did the worm pick on the dwarf wizard that did 200 damage to it in 3 rounds? no. It picked on me, who barely did 20 damage. well, consecutive failed will saves vs fear combined with a failed fort save vs poisonous saliva which induced paralysis (yes, this was a homebrewed monster), left me all but petrified in its stomach

YvizztX23
2010-01-02, 02:10 AM
During the final climatic battle of an adventure, all but two of the characters were able to attack the main villain at the the time. It was getting late, and we had to end the session. One of the player's prepared to power attack him, and I made the horrific mistake of saying "okay, you need to roll at least an 8 to hit him". Naturally, he rolled a 7. Much cursing ensued.

tcrudisi
2010-01-02, 12:15 PM
This occurred in 4e:

I was playing a Bard and the primary healer. We get ambushed by some monsters with auras that stacked and did damage and immobilized on hit. I get hit (and thus immobilized) 30 feet away from the party. I needed to be within 25 feet. I go down quickly (but not dead). The Paladin then goes down after burning all of his healing powers keeping himself up (the stacking auras were just nasty at our level). Then the Rogue goes down. I proceed to roll a 20 on a death saving throw, so I get to spend a healing surge and pop back up. At this point, I still have all my heals left, but I'm still too far away to use them. The monsters, seeing someone who's still bloodied, come brambling my way. At the start of my turn, their auras put me back into negatives. (The 20 did save my life though, as their aura would have killed me if I had not gotten to spend a healing surge).

Well, two of our allies were still up and fighting and things were looking very, very bad indeed. The Wizard, who is the worst D&D player I have ever met, turned out to be our most effective combatant due to the fact that he picked one of the worst at-wills in the game and these monsters were vulnerable to it. The Invoker is one of the better players, but he was spent as far as powers go. Well, it's the Wizards turn. He has a healing potion and is thinking about drinking it. The conversation went something like this:

Wizard: "I pull out my healing potion to drink."
Invoker: "Don't drink that! Give it to the Bard, he has his heals left!"
Wizard: "Yes, but I need the hit points."
Invoker: "He can heal you for a lot more than that silly potion and he can heal BOTH of us!"
Wizard: "Okay, I pull out the healing potion and move beside the Bard. Now I cast scorching burst here (he points on the map). I'll drop the healing potion on the bards chest so he can use it."

*What ensues is a 5 minute conversation of all the players and the DM trying to tell the Wizard that simply putting a healing potion on someones chest is not enough; it would require a standard action to pour it down their throat. Also, hitting allies is bad. The player never understands.*

*Wizard then does what he said he was going to do, anyway. His Scorching Burst missed all 4 enemies and hit the Invoker, dropping the Invoker to negatives.*

My turn rolls around...
DM: "Make a death saving throw"
Wizard: "Wait, he's supposed to be at 10 hit points! I gave him the healing potion."
Everyone at the table: "(&#$ #)&*($ @)#(* $_@&#$_@U"

*Wizard quickly gets a beat-down from the monsters*

DM: "Alright, we'll just call this a TPK."
Invoker: "No, we've already seen one nat 20 on a death saving throw. Let's play this out."

*Rogue makes a 20 on his death saving throw. He proceeds to stand up and run around in circles to avoid the auras*

*I roll another 20, and the Rogue has managed to draw the foes away from me, so I don't go unconcscious via the aura.*
Bard: "Hey, what's this healing potion doing on my chest? Anyway... I'll use one of my Bard heals on the Wizard and my Cleric heal on the Invoker. As my final action, I'll move away from them."

Well, we went on to win that fight thanks to 3 natural 20's on death saving throws and me finally being able to use my heals. But we will never let the player of the Wizard live down his decision to Scorching Burst instead of bringing the healer back into the fight, especially since his decision didn't harm any bad guys and knocked an ally unconscious.

Kami2awa
2010-01-02, 07:07 PM
In Nomine campaign, with the PCs as angels in human form:

Fighting against a demon in a graveyard because they stumbled upon a gateway to Hell that he was protecting, the demon announces "Now you will pay for your violation of my domain!"

I roll his attack as GM. He rolls 1,1,1. In this system, this signifies direct intervention by God. (6,6,6 is the opposite...)

... the demon is overwhelmed as ALL of the stone statues of angels in the graveyard animate and attack him, in a manner not unlike a certain Dr Who episode, described as I switched on a prepared background musical cue on my laptop of Handel's Hallelujah Chorus.

Swordgleam
2010-01-02, 08:38 PM
especially since his decision didn't harm any bad guys and knocked an ally unconscious.

Those are the best decisions. Reminded me of something that happened in my post-apoc 4e campaign. (And people who think that crit fumble rules are the worst thing to happen to gaming, you can skip this anecdote. We'll do lunch later.)

The players were bringing a portable (sort of) generator back to their village. Since it was heavy, they used Tenser's Floating Disc. Two people had the ritual: the Cleric, who had a very bad Arcana skill, and the Wizard, who has a great Arcana skill.

Now, the latter character is two souls sharing the same body (long story): a Wizard and Paladin. To avoid confusing the rest of the party, however, they both pretend to be the Paladin and say their magic is a gift from their god. So anyway, the Wizard casts Tenser's Floating Disc under the generator, and off they go.

On the way back to the village, they get into a fight. The Fighter gets badly hurt and decides, for whatever reason, that the safest thing to do is hide under the generator. I should mention that they're all on a hanging walkway in a sewer, so it's kind of like this:

heavy generator
_floating disc_
fighter
___walkway___

short but painful drop

sewer slime

I'm sure you can all see how safe that looks. Anyway, for some reason, the Wizard decides that this round he's going to go all-out to convince the party that he's still the Paladin, and yells, "For the glory of Torog!" as he attacks.

He rolls a 1. So to sum up, he's underground, calling on the power of a cthonian deity, with the soul of a worshipper of that deity occupying his body. And he rolls a 1.

All of a sudden, the Paladin is in charge of the body. Which would be a great thing, as he's much better in a fight, except for one problem: the Paladin doesn't know any rituals.

With the Wizard gone, Tenser's Floating Disc vanishes, and the heavy generator comes crashing down on the Fighter, knocking him through the flimsy walkway, and pinning him in the sewer slime.

For some reason, the Fighter really doesn't like the Paladin.

Soranar
2010-01-02, 08:53 PM
3.5 Paladin, level 3

failed EVERY throw for an entire afternoon

not a single attack succeeded, I failed every saving throw

that day a bard outtanked me and did all the fighting with a rapier against crit immune undead , he didn't even have a str bonus to damage