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Rauthiss
2010-03-23, 08:51 PM
So, uh, hey guys. I write poems and stuff, and figured I'd post 'em here and see what you all thought of them. :3

As a note: I have these posted other places, and you can probably find those with a quick google. That said, If you choose to do so, please don't judge or reveal any private information. I trust you guys.

Be warned, I tend to write things that I fancy as very "deep", and I'm a huge fan of the more stricter forms, especially in terms of rhyme scheme - If you're not a fan of sonnets, I advise you get your taste of poetry somewhere else.

ON TO THE POETRY (In spoiler blocks for YOUR convenience!):

Loneliness
There will always be those more beloved than I
There will always be many with much greater heart
There are those whose hopes will never die
There are those who can make simply great works of art

So where do I fit, the one who gives nothing?
Why do i stay here, exist on this earth?
I, who though I try to, cannot stop loving
I, who give ev'rything but nothing of worth

I live for myself and I live not for others,
For I am worthless to every soul
What joy can I bring to my sisters and brothers?
None, so I will live my life single and whole.

But if you'll spare some time for me
I'll give what I can, my love, to thee

Good Morning, Oblivion
Good Morning, Oblivion.
Good Night, Security.
My patience is wearing thin.
There's nothing else left to see.

Good Morning, Loneliness.
Good Night, being Loved.
My friends - all I'll miss.
Not being hurt or shoved.

Good Morning, my Lifetime.
Good Night, my Illusions.
My ears will bring sweet rhyme
Instead of delusions.

Good Morning, Moonlight
Good Night, Daybright

Divide
Call me darkness, Call me light,
But all I am is shades of gray.
Call me wrong or call me right,
Morality changes day to day.

Morals - You say that I have none,
And such a lie you speak to me!
From all the actions I have done,
My morals exist; you just don't see.

I dance the line between the two,
I hold the scales in my own hands.
So have I always - I will! - I do!
Bound to it by my own bands.

I follow neither, choose no side,
My path, instead, is the divide.

A Song of Mooonlight
I sing a song of moonlight,
A tune twinned with a star,
The darkness falls around me,
My soul's door left ajar.

I sing a song of twilight,
Of blending white and black,
Of morning and of evening,
Of overage and lack.

I sing a song of starlight,
A delicate web of life,
Letting the light of eternity shine,
On the struggles and the strife.

I sing a song of loving,
A passion strong as flame,
She was standing beside me,
Will I ever feel the same?

I sing a song of solitude,
I was alone and lost,
Until her flame rekindled me,
A dragon of Ice and frost.

I sing a song of sorrow,
A song of blood and death,
And yet, I'm drawn to life,
Awakened from eternal rest.

I sing a song of happiness,
A glory newly known,
Though I spread seeds of sadness,
Joy is what I've sown.

I sing a song of nightfall,
My own story is told,
To I, it is always worth,
Much more than silver and gold.

I sing a song of eternity,
What was wrong is now made right.
This is the lesson I've learned as,
By the moon, I sing of light.

Fallen
Flame of youth and cold of death,
Pass ye through these mirrored halls,
Uncommon swiftness of thy breath,
As thee, from glory, slowly falls.

Thy wings art spread, thy jaws art clenched,
Fall down to this mortal's realm,
In your tears, thy hands are drenched,
Now take for thee, thy fate's own helm!

Darkened angel, beauty lost,
Disobeyed thy only lord,
Even dissent has it's own cost,
Reweaving of thy fate's own cord.

Falling to a mortal life,
Bring it joy, or bring it strife.

As always, I wholeheartedly ask for criticism and any words of encouragement. I'll post more here as I write them, probably.

Tira-chan
2010-03-23, 10:06 PM
Very impressive. Not many e-poets I've read have the dedication to stick to a formula as binding as a sonnet - heck, most of them won't even stick to a rhyme scheme. As a dedicated syllable counter in my own stuff, I admire your rhythm, but it feels a little awkward in some places - you may have sacrificed the flow of the poem to get the right rhyme. Personally, my favorite is "Divide". The last couplet in particular is perfect in that one.

Rauthiss
2010-03-23, 10:22 PM
Very impressive. Not many e-poets I've read have the dedication to stick to a formula as binding as a sonnet - heck, most of them won't even stick to a rhyme scheme. As a dedicated syllable counter in my own stuff, I admire your rhythm, but it feels a little awkward in some places - you may have sacrificed the flow of the poem to get the right rhyme. Personally, my favorite is "Divide". The last couplet in particular is perfect in that one.

Why thank you! I admit, I tend to sacrifice rhythm for the correct sounding rhyme at times. Thank for the compliments, however!

Player
2010-03-23, 10:24 PM
I love them,because their so.. I dont want to sound cheesy or anything but their deep.They hit me on a level of understanding most people cant even fathom.Going through a large period of depression and general hate I can relate to most of these. I also love your creative choice in wording.

Rauthiss
2010-03-24, 08:34 AM
I love them,because their so.. I dont want to sound cheesy or anything but their deep.They hit me on a level of understanding most people cant even fathom.Going through a large period of depression and general hate I can relate to most of these. I also love your creative choice in wording.
Why thank you! It's nice that I was able to relate to you so well through that farce of communication we call the english language. :3

Rauthiss
2010-05-03, 12:32 PM
I think I've figured out my muse - She's a fickle bitch. I can only write depressing poetry when I'm happy, and I can only write happy stuff like limericks when I'm sad.

That said, I'll throw you all a taste of my own villanelle.

Absence
If time had gone a different way
I might still be loving you
But that is all that I can say

At the start of every day
I think of what you and I could do
If time had gone a different way

I see your face, and look away
Softly whispering “I love you too”
But that is all that I can say

The sun shines on, but I see gray
Yet I could still see every hue
If time had gone a different way

And though our paths have gone astray
I ask, “Could our love have been true?”
But that is all that I can say

The sun shines down – the brightest ray
Lets slip a voice that sounds like you
“If time had gone a different way…
But that is all that I can say”

Well, that's out. Have fun reading, if you do. (did?)