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Dubious Pie
2010-07-26, 03:40 PM
I DM 3.5e D&D. I had one player "Tim", who would only play female elf Wu-Jens. Wu-Jens have to take certain player created "taboos". The problem is that "Tim" was a massive pervert. Here are some jems:

Must not bathe.
Must eat only meat that has been left in the feces of the type animal that it came from for at least a week.
Must not wear clothes.
Must eat only own excrement and drink only own urine.
Must eat vomit-inducing plants at all meals, followed by eating the vomit.

And those are just the ones I can say on these here forums. List your own stories of bad players here!

Keld Denar
2010-07-26, 03:43 PM
Google The Lanky Bugger or the Return of Lanky

I bet very few people have had to call the cops on another player during a game...

balistafreak
2010-07-26, 03:47 PM
@Dubious Pie: How did "Tim" ever become a player at your table? :smallconfused:

Kylarra
2010-07-26, 03:51 PM
@Dubious Pie: How did "Tim" ever become a player at your table? :smallconfused:Or get away with such taboos.

Sergeantbrother
2010-07-26, 03:53 PM
I believe that those eating taboos would be lethal in short order. I think that the only one of those I would allow is the prohibition on bathing.

Talon Sky
2010-07-26, 03:54 PM
Next taboo: must use the bathroom on the defeated corpse of any enemy personally slain, raise as a zombie, and then defile sexually before being allowed to slay the next enemy.

:D

Dubious Pie
2010-07-26, 03:57 PM
As for why Tim got to play, it is simple. He was already in the group playing a (female, of course) Dwarf Warblade who died. Then he went insane and starting the aforementioned stuff. As for why he was allowed the taboos, I did not read them past the first one. It was a failure on my part. He did get kicked out after he was caught violating a toilet paper tube in the bathroom during a session.


Next taboo: must use the bathroom on the defeated corpse of any enemy personally slain, raise as a zombie, and then defile sexually before being allowed to slay the next enemy.

:D

Except for the zombie part, that was one of the taboos.

Dr.Epic
2010-07-26, 03:58 PM
Worst I had was a player who never showed up for sessions. He'd always kept us late so we'd start the adventure without them and then they'd show up and the DM would have to have a talk to them about how they catch up. Sometimes he wouldn't show up at all. One time we climbed half a mountain and by the other player (a gnome) caught up, we were all sleeping so I took him (I was playing a barbarian) and decided to use the new object I found (it was dark) and use it as a pillow. Eventually we all got tired of him being late so we just killed off his character.

Vitruviansquid
2010-07-26, 03:59 PM
Lol. We had a new player in the group once, where we were all teenage boys.

He played a female healer and, upon his first act of healing, he says, "I heal so-and-so... with my sexual healing."

The game grinds to a stop immediately as we all stare at him.

Talon Sky
2010-07-26, 04:06 PM
Except for the zombie part, that was one of the taboos.

Awesome psychic powers ^_^

drengnikrafe
2010-07-26, 04:07 PM
I thought I knew what a bad player was, until I read this thread... I'll share anyway, though it's not as... awful.

Actually, it's a tie. First, D&D 3.x,we have the person who would only play elf druids, but always forgot he could cast spells, and forgot about his animal companion. Also, he forgot his weapon proficiencies and armor restrictions. And his skills. And his personality. And... Well, that's pretty much it.
Second, CoC, we have the idiot who, after circumventing the vertical cave of an awful eldritch beast in pure darkness who growled deathly growls and shot out tentacles, decided to go back (after he was safe and away) and shoot at it with his shotgun. The problem wasn't this one incident. The problem is that he ALWAYS did stupid things like that.

Xallace
2010-07-26, 04:14 PM
Lol. We had a new player in the group once, where we were all teenage boys.

He played a female healer and, upon his first act of healing, he says, "I heal so-and-so... with my sexual healing."

The game grinds to a stop immediately as we all stare at him.

Hey, it's like that one time I played a female character! Except it was the rest of the party who was overly sexual! And misogynist! Yeah!

There was one guy who came up with an interesting character, a backstory with plenty of adventure hooks, and a great circumstance for getting into the party. He then proceeded to ignore every single one of those things and refused to go on adventures while the party tried to convince him for the sake of the game. Such passive-aggressiveness I have not seen since in D&D.

There was another guy who believed that his fighter was the party face and stomped all over the bard's spotlight. His way of being the "face" involved talking at half speed, making sure to never use monosyllabic words if he could avoid it, and starting every single sentence with three honorifics.

But my experience is more with terrible DMs than players.

Eurus
2010-07-26, 04:18 PM
There was another guy who believed that his fighter was the party face and stomped all over the bard's spotlight. His way of being the "face" involved talking at half speed, making sure to never use monosyllabic words if he could avoid it, and starting every single sentence with three honorifics.

That's arguably a pretty good way of roleplaying 8 charisma, heh. :smallbiggrin:

Optimystik
2010-07-26, 04:19 PM
You're obliged to give him circumstance penalties for nasty taboos, FYI. I doubt his character's breath/odor will be very favorable after doing disgusting things like that, resulting in huge penalties to Diplomacy, for instance. When the party meets with the king, have the guards make him wait outside, etc.

HamHam
2010-07-26, 04:21 PM
I am usually a very liberal DM when it comes to part alignment. But there is a certain person who is no longer allowed to play evil characters. Or Jedi. Especially not evil Jedi.

He got killed by his own party in the first session, not once, but twice doing the last one.

Xallace
2010-07-26, 04:27 PM
That's arguably a pretty good way of roleplaying 8 charisma, heh. :smallbiggrin:

:smallbiggrin: You have a point! It would have been funny had the player not been so convinced that his diplomatic expertise were necessary. Or if the bard ever actually got a chance to say something.

tcrudisi
2010-07-26, 04:34 PM
Since my real name is Tim, I'll pretend to take offense to the OP (note: I really didn't) and call my worst player ever "Dubious Pie" (another note: It's not really the OP).

"Dubious Pie" in 4e is a fake lemming. You know the computer games where the lemmings all run off cliffs unless you can navigate the stage properly and help them survive? He's that, except not as good at taking directions.

Once he died in the first combat. Since we were tired of resurrecting him, he went to create a new character. He comes back and dies in the first encounter with that character. He just... well, he ignores advise and does his own thing, which results in him dieing a lot.

Now, that's fine. Bad players know how to die a lot. What makes him the worst?

In one combat, I was the healer. Due to the combat, I got stuck 6 squares away from my allies (we were all immobilized), so I could not heal them. In fact, it was a moot point, as I went down first. Slowly they went down. We were down to 2 people: "Dubious Pie" and another guy. Now, "Dubious Pie" was playing a wizard and could do fire damage to which these monsters were vulnerable. He asks what he should do. We all tell him, "Give Tim a healing potion to bring him back up, he has 3 heals he can use!" He says, "Okay, I can attack and then give him the potion." "No, no... it takes a standard action to give him the potion... don't attack, give him the potion!"

After a few minutes of explaining why it won't work, he says he understands. He proceeds to attack, killing nothing, and then places the healing potion on my chest. So I can drink it on my turn. Even though I'm unconscious.

Because, apparently, dropping a healing potion on an unconscious friends chest is enough to bring them back up. Rrrriiiiggghhhhttt.

Luckily, I rolled a 20 on my death saving throw and popped back up, brought everyone back up, and we survived. We should have died (at one point we were all unconscious), but we asked the DM to play it out and due to incredibly lucky rolling survived.

No thanks to "Dubious Pie." And he makes mistakes like this ALL the time. Usually, thank goodness, he just manages to kill himself.

Xefas
2010-07-26, 04:50 PM
I suppose the theoretical "Worst Player Ever" is the one you tell to bring the chips, because someone else is bringing the salsa, and everyone else is splitting the pizza bill, but instead they end the human race via nuclear holocaust.

My personal "Worst Player" was just bitter and antagonistic. Made the game not fun for everyone else for a few sessions. We tried to talk him out of it; sat down and had mature conversations. Didn't work, so we kicked him. Not a whole lot of drama.

Lord Loss
2010-07-26, 04:51 PM
Some guy tried to break my arm cause i forgot Tome Of Magic at home...

Iuliano05
2010-07-26, 05:01 PM
my worst player ever was a DM and player combo. It involved a lot of favoritism, way over powered items, and just stupid amount of well stupidity. It got to the point where me (Evil Sorc) just started killing said player every time he did something stupid in real life. Like stare at my GF's Tits all night long till she didn't want to come because it was creepy. Oh I have a character in my group who started off playing a commoner with commoner stats, took survivor from Savage Species and then took samurai. Granted its very hilarious that he ligament survived while doing dumb stuff like trying to hand fed a ghoul some fish.

Optimystik
2010-07-26, 05:06 PM
Some guy tried to break my arm cause i forgot Tome Of Magic at home...

:smallconfused:
Yeah, I wouldn't play with that guy.

Critical
2010-07-26, 05:13 PM
I DM 3.5e D&D. I had one player "Tim", who would only play female elf Wu-Jens. Wu-Jens have to take certain player created "taboos". The problem is that "Tim" was a massive pervert. Here are some jems:

Must not bathe.
Must eat only meat that has been left in the feces of the type animal that it came from for at least a week.
Must not wear clothes.
Must eat only own excrement and drink only own urine.
Must eat vomit-inducing plants at all meals, followed by eating the vomit.

And those are just the ones I can say on these here forums. List your own stories of bad players here!
One Wu Jen One Cup.

Ilmryn
2010-07-26, 05:17 PM
The worst player i ever played with would never read the rules. Usually this ended up with her playing a bard that could basically do nothing but sing, for +1, but one time she was playing a druid, when she suddenly announces that she is casting 'A Thousand Fires'. We search through the PHB, the spell compendium, etc., but no such spell exists. Finally, the DM decides that it is a Fire Storm. After the session, we find out that she simply misread 'A Thousand Faces'. Gah! She had just written down her abilities and some spells she thought sounded cool without actually having a clue what they did.

Dubious Pie
2010-07-26, 05:18 PM
One Wu Jen One Cup.

I am... surprised no one brought that up earlier.

Evard
2010-07-26, 05:34 PM
Worst player ever?

I was playing in a 4e game, I was a fighter, he was a sorcerer, and there was a pacifist cleric... We were fighting the BBEG and the sorcerer got knocked to 0 hp (we were level 30) after about 45 minutes of the mega battle... He huffs and puffs and storms out of the room pissed that "he lost" ... The rest of us were kinda O_o because the next round the Cleric walked 1 square and healed him to full HP... He then proceeded to tell me how much he hated me haha all because his optimized sorcerer "lost" and my average fighter didn't die... haha I almost feel sorry for the jerk.

Popertop
2010-07-26, 05:34 PM
we have a player in our group who right now is playing a wild shape druid (no prestige class to help him be better at it, probably not even natural spell or wild feats, just straight druid) who is Neutral Good. But the form he chooses is a Green dragon. Like, I know it's not that important, but did you have to choose a chromatic dragon, evil alignment, when you're a good aligned druid? Like srsly, there are tons of metallic dragons, but you had to pick a green dragon. And he wasn't even using the extra bonuses druids get to whatever they wildshape into, he was just using the base template. BASE TEMPLATE I tell you. Then he managed to completely ignore the discussion about how the wizard in the party who was riding a gold dragon had antimagic field up, and decides to go fly right by him. He gets knocked out of wildshape and falls a certain amount of feet, taking like 80 points of damage.

On another occasion, he was playing a ranger and using his animal companion as "bait", making it walk forward into the darkness like 50 feet in front of him incase something attacks it so he can get away and be safe. Yeah, way to respect nature there pal.

He's also a very bad roleplayer in case you couldn't already tell.

Vitruviansquid
2010-07-26, 05:40 PM
Worst player ever?

I was playing in a 4e game, I was a fighter, he was a sorcerer, and there was a pacifist cleric... We were fighting the BBEG and the sorcerer got knocked to 0 hp (we were level 30) after about 45 minutes of the mega battle... He huffs and puffs and storms out of the room pissed that "he lost" ... The rest of us were kinda O_o because the next round the Cleric walked 1 square and healed him to full HP... He then proceeded to tell me how much he hated me haha all because his optimized sorcerer "lost" and my average fighter didn't die... haha I almost feel sorry for the jerk.

What is... "lost"?

FoE
2010-07-26, 05:42 PM
I once gamed with a guy who turned out to be a homicidal robot. Only the DM and I survived the end of the campaign, and that's only because I remembered to ask him about the meaning of life.

Great roleplayer, though.

akma
2010-07-26, 06:16 PM
I once DMed to a player that everytime he met an enemy he decided to defect to the other side. Luckily, it was a 1 on 1 game, and most of the time both of us sayed jokes. It was actully fun, and in the end I simply did not allow him to defect.

Kaje
2010-07-26, 06:32 PM
Not much bad has happened in my limited experience. Probably the worst is really quite tame by the standards of the rest of this thread. In Returners Final Fantasy RPG, a player insisted, despite all our warnings, on playing a Moogle Thief, thief being probably the worst job in the game. He showed up for his first session late, and hadn't given a single thought to who his character was, so he quickly decided to play him like a kleptomaniac Kender, using every action to try (and fail) to steal gil rather than actually contribute to the battle. He hadn't even decided on a name yet, so had us call him Mog (the most cliche Moogle name ever). He didn't last past one session.

Fiery Diamond
2010-07-26, 07:07 PM
I once gamed with a guy who turned out to be a homicidal robot. Only the DM and I survived the end of the campaign, and that's only because I remembered to ask him about the meaning of life.

Great roleplayer, though.

Is this a reference to something?

Lhurgyof
2010-07-26, 07:24 PM
As for why Tim got to play, it is simple. He was already in the group playing a (female, of course) Dwarf Warblade who died. Then he went insane and starting the aforementioned stuff. As for why he was allowed the taboos, I did not read them past the first one. It was a failure on my part. He did get kicked out after he was caught violating a toilet paper tube in the bathroom during a session.

.... Say what? ...
I'd have to say Karl. He's an ass, he never admits he's wrong, he stinks, and he plays ****ty characters. The latter I don't really care about.

But seriously... Karl:"He can take an extra attack with a natural weapon at a -2"
Me: "No, it's -5, unless he has multi-attack"
Karl: "No, **** you, I read it in the Monster Manual"
Me: "I'm just saying..."
Karl: "No, **** YOU!"

.... :smallmad:

Savannah
2010-07-26, 07:36 PM
There was the player who
1) liked to do things like steal food off my plate when I was sitting next to him (we ate dinner while we played) and other minor annoyances

2) accused my little brother of cheating (my brother does not cheat)

3) cheated (during the period he accused my brother of cheating, mind you)

4) when I (less than diplomatically, I will admit) called him on his cheating, got his mother involved and they both accused me of a bunch of things that, ironically, he did and I did not.

5) when the DM's family pointed out (diplomatically) that having another player call you a cheater when you are a cheater isn't exactly emotional abuse, his entire family cut off all ties with both my family and the DM's family. (Which is too bad, I really liked his little sister.)

Kesnit
2010-07-26, 07:39 PM
We never figured out this guy's name, so we nicknamed him Larry. (We originally thought he was another guy who looked similar whose name was Larry.)

He showed up at a 4e game I was playing and asked to play. The DM agreed. He had a large number of painted minis and offered to let the rest of the players pick out one they wanted. Then he told us if we wanted to keep the minis, we had to buy him food. (This wasn't an issue, as he was selling the minis and there was a Chinese restaurant next door.)

The game started, but Larry kept leaving the room to try to sell his minis to anyone who walked by. Combat started, and Larry kept missing rounds because he was trying to sell minis.

But the worst came when, in the middle of an RP scene, he asked if any of us wanted to buy pot or cocaine. (He didn't use those words - can't remember what he called them - so it took us a while to realize what he had asked. He then proceeded to ramble about how his grandson (who lives with him) was dealing but his (grandson's) girlfriend was making him give it up so he (Larry) was helping his grandson sell off his stock. He kept talking about this (interspersed with selling minis) for the next 2.5 hours.

Thankfully, that was the last time we saw him.

Evard
2010-07-26, 08:03 PM
What is... "lost"?

That was how he saw going to 0 hp 10 feet away from a cleric that hadn't used any healing spells yet.... haha

He had a racial or class power or something (maybe through an item) that allowed him to automatically get back up and use a standard action but went into a rage and forgot about it...

I HATE players like that

RE:Insanity
2010-07-26, 09:09 PM
I once had a player who not only didn't roleplay his character (though the story and everything behind the character was awesome) but constantly bickered with everyone else, would 'switch over' in battle because 'evil is cool *snrk!snrk!*' and 'I'd totally rape the elf chick', and didn't even play well. He was a boring player, if you could look past the annoying *******. Plus, he was a friend of the son of the guy's house we were playing at, so even when I kicked him out of the game, he got to stay at the house and sit there calling everyone the dumbest names ever while his mother just shrugged and went, "Oh well!".
He started fondling the dice (yes, fondling) and I told him to stop, so he then went on facebook and called everyone in the group a retard and a gayfer on his facebook wall, asked how to spell my name, interrupted me to say, "Oh, right, it's G-A-Y!" and then continued to 'insult' everyone. Normally I'm too apathetic to care, but his insults were just stupid. He pretty much shouted a word he didn't know the meaning of, threw gay and retarded in there, and then mumbled, "neck head ass..." and covered his face when someone looked at him.
I went on facebook the next morning, to where he had posted all the comments about everyone and said," Hey, if you don't have the balls to just deal with the fact we won't let you play, don't bother all three (yes, only 3, counting his mother and grandmother) of your friends to complain about us. They don't care."
He came back the next day, going on about how he would kick my ass (we're both scrawny, but he's a redneck with about five pocket knives who's twice my height), when one of my player's little brother spoke up, the ass punched him in the face and pulled a knife.
I then proceeded to trip him before he did anything, causing him to fall back and hit his head on the garage floor, knocking himself out.

Lhurgyof
2010-07-26, 09:14 PM
I once had a player who not only didn't roleplay his character (though the story and everything behind the character was awesome) but constantly bickered with everyone else, would 'switch over' in battle because 'evil is cool *snrk!snrk!*' and 'I'd totally rape the elf chick', and didn't even play well. He was a boring player, if you could look past the annoying *******. Plus, he was a friend of the son of the guy's house we were playing at, so even when I kicked him out of the game, he got to stay at the house and sit there calling everyone the dumbest names ever while his mother just shrugged and went, "Oh well!".
He started fondling the dice (yes, fondling) and I told him to stop, so he then went on facebook and called everyone in the group a retard and a gayfer on his facebook wall, asked how to spell my name, interrupted me to say, "Oh, right, it's G-A-Y!" and then continued to 'insult' everyone. Normally I'm too apathetic to care, but his insults were just stupid. He pretty much shouted a word he didn't know the meaning of, threw gay and retarded in there, and then mumbled, "neck head ass..." and covered his face when someone looked at him.
I went on facebook the next morning, to where he had posted all the comments about everyone and said," Hey, if you don't have the balls to just deal with the fact we won't let you play, don't bother all three (yes, only 3, counting his mother and grandmother) of your friends to complain about us. They don't care."
He came back the next day, going on about how he would kick my ass (we're both scrawny, but he's a redneck with about five pocket knives who's twice my height), when one of my player's little brother spoke up, the ass punched him in the face and pulled a knife.
I then proceeded to trip him before he did anything, causing him to fall back and hit his head on the garage floor, knocking himself out.

You took improved trip, I see. :smallwink:

The Glyphstone
2010-07-26, 09:15 PM
I once had a player who not only didn't roleplay his character (though the story and everything behind the character was awesome) but constantly bickered with everyone else, would 'switch over' in battle because 'evil is cool *snrk!snrk!*' and 'I'd totally rape the elf chick', and didn't even play well. He was a boring player, if you could look past the annoying *******. Plus, he was a friend of the son of the guy's house we were playing at, so even when I kicked him out of the game, he got to stay at the house and sit there calling everyone the dumbest names ever while his mother just shrugged and went, "Oh well!".
He started fondling the dice (yes, fondling) and I told him to stop, so he then went on facebook and called everyone in the group a retard and a gayfer on his facebook wall, asked how to spell my name, interrupted me to say, "Oh, right, it's G-A-Y!" and then continued to 'insult' everyone. Normally I'm too apathetic to care, but his insults were just stupid. He pretty much shouted a word he didn't know the meaning of, threw gay and retarded in there, and then mumbled, "neck head ass..." and covered his face when someone looked at him.
I went on facebook the next morning, to where he had posted all the comments about everyone and said," Hey, if you don't have the balls to just deal with the fact we won't let you play, don't bother all three (yes, only 3, counting his mother and grandmother) of your friends to complain about us. They don't care."
He came back the next day, going on about how he would kick my ass (we're both scrawny, but he's a redneck with about five pocket knives who's twice my height), when one of my player's little brother spoke up, the ass punched him in the face and pulled a knife.
I then proceeded to trip him before he did anything, causing him to fall back and hit his head on the garage floor, knocking himself out.

Yet more proof why Craft (Smack Talk) is a worthwhile feat.

hustlertwo
2010-07-26, 09:37 PM
Lol. We had a new player in the group once, where we were all teenage boys.

He played a female healer and, upon his first act of healing, he says, "I heal so-and-so... with my sexual healing."

The game grinds to a stop immediately as we all stare at him.

I feel like we need more than that to call this guy bad; based solely on that, I'd say he was making a joke and perhaps you took it too seriously.

Moff Chumley
2010-07-26, 09:46 PM
You took improved trip, I see. :smallwink:

In old Soviet Russia, punk pwn you?

FMArthur
2010-07-26, 10:13 PM
I won't name a name, since it's fairly unusual and anyone who knows this guy would instantly recognize him from his name and mannerisms:

He forgets the rules - for anything and everything. It takes him minutes to forget the basic foundations of D&D rules after it's explained to him. He basically needs someone's help to accomplish every action or when he is the target of any action, but doesn't immediately acknowledge this or ask for help before the problem to speed things up.
He can't do math to save his life. To his credit, he was always underperforming because of his poor math instead of overperforming like some others claiming math errors in that group...
He stutters a little bit, and when he is nervous intersperses "heh" between every word, which is frequently because he feels understandably bad. This is hard to watch and makes everyone feel super guilty for trying to make sense of his character's bonuses when it makes him nervous.
For some reason he thought that Sneak Attack and Death Attack were weapons and could not seem to shake this idea. It was honestly a little troubling and just cheated him out of his weapons' bonuses and base damage when he used them. I discreetly took these things into account for him from behind the screen when it was obvious he would not learn.
Speaking of Death Attack, when he got this ability the party was basically missing a member during every fight, although combat was nonetheless faster for it. It felt like I was kicking a puppy when I had to tell him the monsters were not slain by his 4-turn attacks.
He doesn't do anything that makes sense in a social encounter. Attempts to pick up and carry NPCs (failing every grapple), tries to steal things that have no value or can't easily be taken, attempts Sense Motive when NPCs are simply reacting to things happening in plain view of the players... while other players are talking to them and generally trying to get things done.
His character sheet was often incomplete and contained erroneous information throughout. A couple of times me and another player helped work out his bonuses and helped him pick some skills. Maybe it was from a level-up mistake, new equipment mistake, or was just plain magic, but he managed to lose his skill points and screw up just about every number on his sheet over the course of an hour each time. One time I saw his Grapple mod was listed as 1d8. After some inquiry, it was revealed he had mistakenly put his weapon damage in there... except even that was grossly off-target and the wrong die size.

He was definitely somewhat handicapped in some way that no one ever asked about. He was a nice guy, and I feel super bad for him, but he was the most detrimental player I've ever had to deal with for a campaign.

Mark Hall
2010-07-26, 11:03 PM
Until recently, I would have said the guy who metagames badly (no, Hzurr, not at our table).

However, he was overtaken by the guy who decided he wanted his cleric to get access to undead minions. No problem there. He wasn't sure what deity he wanted, so I named off a few in the Realms... eventually settling on Talos, who is, essentially, the God of Random Destruction, who pretty much everyone hates. He then wanted a herd of special goats from Races of the Wild (note: This is a Castles and Crusades game, not 3.5). When I said no, he bought a herd of goats, anyway.

So far, pretty tame, aside from the fact that I have to figure out how to work a CE nutjob with a herd of goats into the game.

Then we start fighting. They kill the hobgoblins, and he goes up to loot one of the corpses. In addition to money and weapons, he takes... samples. Blood and hair I didn't have a particular problem with. Stool and semen? That was a bit over the line. Insisting that his cleric had to touch another character's boobs to heal her? That was over the line. Spending large amounts of time trying to get his goats to have sex?

These are the things that make me very reluctant to have him back.

WarKitty
2010-07-26, 11:24 PM
Paladin, Blackguard, and Evil Sorcerer in the same party. Bad setup to begin with. But not too bad...since it was a one-shot where we'd basically been kidnapped and dumped in a cave, the DM decided to loosen the "association" rules for the paladin. We all figure, we get through the game, then maybe have a nice fun battle at the end. Most of us have played evil characters before, it hadn't been a problem until this point.

Enter the Sorcerer. This was our first encounter with Stupid Evil. A short ways into the session, the player gets bored and lobs a fireball at half the party. Confined hall, flat-footed...basically one-shotted two of the other players. I think the game was essentially over at that point, with the addendum that said player is never allowed to be evil again.

leper0messiah
2010-07-26, 11:30 PM
{Scrubbed}

RE:Insanity
2010-07-26, 11:36 PM
{Scrubbed}

Escuse me sir? I'm 19! And yes, I realize I spelled excuse wrong. It's how I say it IRL.

leper0messiah
2010-07-26, 11:39 PM
Escuse me sir? I'm 19! And yes, I realize I spelled excuse wrong. It's how I say it IRL.

you are escused, Mr. Senior :smalltongue:

Mystic Muse
2010-07-26, 11:42 PM
{Scrubbed}

I'm a guy, I'm Seventeen and I'd just like to say :Yuk: to that. I play ladies in Realistic armor. No chainmail bikinis or plate armor that doesn't actually protect anything.

mobdrazhar
2010-07-26, 11:43 PM
There is a player in the game that i run that seems to think Evil means assohole. Don't get me wrong, he's a good mate of mine but everytime he passes perception checks when others don't he never passes the info on to any of the other players.

Also as he is playing a Warlock he kept it in his head that he had to keep picking on a Paladin to make him fall (i know there is no rules for it but i did house rule a way and it's not an easy thing to do).

RE:Insanity
2010-07-26, 11:44 PM
you are escused, Mr. Senior :smalltongue:

I dunno who you are but I already like you. But back on topic.

Yeah, after the whole tripping thing, he came back a lot, but never stayed once I came, and joined up with a group of other kids in the neighborhood who were known for ripping up lawns with a golf cart, egging cars, breaking into cars and garages while pretending to be a lawn care service, and generally being stupid.
They tried to pull the burning dog poo trick on us once, and as they were doing it, I popped out of the front door with an aerosol can and sprayed the fire, scaring the living crap (le pun!) out of them.

leper0messiah
2010-07-26, 11:46 PM
I'm a guy, I'm Seventeen and I'd just like to say :Yuk: to that. I play ladies in Realistic armor. No chainmail bikinis or plate armor that doesn't actually protect anything.
yeah, you can't really blame them though...it's a marketing technique:smallwink:

ANYWAY, back ontopic!
Insanity stole my idea to go back on topic...words I never though I'd say...

The worst I've ever experienced is more of a group that didn't wanna play. It's frustrating after awhile to try and run an adventure while all they want to know is who each other likes and gossip (teenage boys:smallsigh:). It actually kinda turned me off D&D for awhile but now that I'm a bit older I think I can find a more mature group that wants to play.

Lycan 01
2010-07-26, 11:54 PM
Ugh. I've had several.


I've had Rules Lawyers. I've had guys who didn't know the setting and just kinda sat there not having fun, but wanted to play anyway because they had nothing better to do. I've had the GRIMDARK guy who's character was obsessed with darkness and blood and death and chaotic powers and stuff because he was molested by a priest of Bahamut when he was an orphan (he killed the priest by mind controlling him into ripping his own junk off), thus also giving him an excuse to hate the Paladin of Bahamut, who he didn't like in real life to begin with and just wanted to cause trouble. I've had the girl who was just there because of her boyfriend. I've had the guy who was just there because of his girlfriend. I've had the guy who was just there. Seriously, just walked by and stopped to watch us for several minutes, making it kinda awkward... Oh, and the guy who just randomly shows up and asks to play, but that was Paranoia so it wasn't really a problem.


But my worst player?


*shudder*


Not for the faint of heart...


Ugh. Seriously, ugh.

He was that guy who... I'm not even sure there's a name for it. Just... That Guy.

He's a bit of an awkward guy. Not very socially apt, talks about things that make people uncomfortable, exudes the... basically the school shooter aura. At any rate, he joined my RPG group during my Freshman year, back when it was only 3 people. (Now its over 10, and I'm a very in-demand DM. :smalleek:) So, he joins, and wants to be a Dragonborn Warlord. Perfect! We already had a Paladin, Warlock, and Wizard. So, we play a game...

Ugh. The Paladin and Warlock, bless their hearts, where good players. The Wizard didn't even show up - he had a bad habit of "accidentally" scheduling soccer games and parties and stuff at the same time, and usually didn't tell people when he couldn't make it. But The Guy was just... terrible. He was the Warlord. He had Healing abilities, yes? Well...

Dude gets pissed every time he misses an attack. Like... starts swearing, using words I don't approve of, to describe the little Kobold he keeps missing. Well, little Kobold and his buddies basically gang-shank the Warlord, and he starts hemoraging HP. Dude goes frickin' emo because he thinks his character sucks, and the game is out to get him, and he has no way of healing himself... I explain that he can heal himself, on several occassions. Well, he doesn't, and gets dropped to 0 HP. Spends the next several turns just sitting there moping and brooding. He finally gets healed by the Paladin, and rejoins the fight with plenty of swearing and brooding to boot.

Next, after several more fightings and emo swear-fests, they get to the leaders of the Kobold clan. Its a fun battle, and the Paladin is basically in an honor dual for the entire battle with the Chieftan. It was an epic battle. Kobold had over 150 HP, and the Paladin managed to single-handedly wittle him down to just 10, with barely that much HP left himself. He has repeatedly told everyone else to stay out of it, and the Warlock and Wizard (who finally showed up) agree to leave him to his battle. That Guy isn't having any of that, and charges in to kill the Chieftan. The Paladin attacks before him, and tries to finish the baddie. But the Kobold Chieftan uses a special ability I gave him to dodge the attack and make it hit an adjacent target, and since the Warlord ran in to attack, he gets hit by it. Well, That Guy goes ballistic, and declares he's bullrushing the Chieftan, even though EVERYONE at the table is glaring daggers at him. Hit, 10 damage, Chieftan dies.

I give the Paladin all the XP, and simply ignore the Warlord.

Now for the Big Bad battle with a Young Black Dragon. I admit, I screwed up. They were no match for this guy. It was a party of four guys who were all level 1-2. It was level 4, and I thought they could handle it. I was wrong, and it proceeded to destroy them. But to avoid a TPK, I tried to give them a chance to reason with it, or escape. The Paladin tries to keep it busy, roaring for everyone else to run. That Guy's Warlord wants to be a hero, and runs up to attack, while EXPLICITLY TRASH TALKING the Black Dragon - ie: me. :smalleek:

Seriously, I've never felt so awkward during character interaction. Its one thing for a player to casually insult your NPC or throw some swear words in. Its acting. This guy... he was serious. He was pouring all of his hatred into his words, like this Black Dragon was some trauma sponge for all the trouble he'd ever experienced in his life. HE was stringing together words that didn't even fit, and basically growling them into my face since I was roleplaying the dragon. I was obviously uncomfortable with it, and IIRC asked him to tone it down, but he still ranted on and on. While also still complaining about not being able to do anything or heal himself. Then he breathed Acid on the Black Dragon. The Dragon threw him across the cavern, just to not have to listen to him anymore.

I called the game a few rounds later, after the Wizard Heroic Sacrificed himself into the Dragon's Mouth to do a point blank Force Orb. Then they tried to heal the dragon, in hopes it would be moved by their show of kindness. *epic level facepalm*

Game over, right? Everybody leaves, That Guy going first. I think its all over, and things can't get worse. I'm approached by the Warlock's player. He has just shared words with the Wizard, and feels I need to know what was said. It seems the Wizard's player saw That Guy doing something during the game that we all missed. Something that's just... wrong.

*eyetwitch*

Dude stuck his hand down his pants. Repeatedly. And liberally scratched himself. Repeatedly. And I'm not talking scratching his waist or anything. I mean, Wizard's player saw him sticking his hand all the way down his underpants. Disturbing, right? It gets worse. Because you see, that whole game, That Guy had been playing with the dice. The dice we were all using. Just... rulling them around in his hands, rubbing them, balancing them, et cetera. All while scratching himself between "dice boredom" moments.

*eyetwitch*

My poor dice were baptized in Germ-X. And he was never invited back to another game.

RE:Insanity
2010-07-26, 11:55 PM
I once had another player who thought that everything could be fixed with magic and that evil was EVILLLLLL!
For instance, when he played a wizard and the bad guy was really just a guy trying to expand his rule because, as it turned out, he ruled a friggin utopia and he wanted to share it.
BBEG: I-I didn't mean to hurt-
Player: WHAT THE HELL? Yes he did, he's evil!
Me: Noooo, he's just trying to-
Player: EVIIIIILLLLL! I wish him out of existence!

Savannah
2010-07-27, 12:04 AM
My poor dice were baptized in Germ-X. And he was never invited back to another game.

Eeeewwww....My first DM told us how, when he was buying some dice, he talked to a woman who said she wouldn't let anyone touch her dice because it was 'bad luck'. We all laughed about it and made a big deal when we had to borrow dice, but I'm beginning to see her point, at least when gaming with jerks...

Dubious Pie
2010-07-27, 12:07 AM
I've found that roleplaying games and teenage boys all end the same way

And Blizzard isn't helping
http://i959.photobucket.com/albums/ae75/leper0messiah/night_elf_icon-2305.jpg

When that incident in the OP happened, I was 16 (The group DM) and "Tim" was 34. So, you fail at stereotypes.

RE:Insanity
2010-07-27, 12:13 AM
When that incident in the OP happened, I was 16 (The group DM) and "Tim" was 34. So, you fail at stereotypes.

Effin creepy.

Once had a d20 apocalypse character who never showed up on time, didn't tell anyone when he had things scheduled (and he always did have things schuduled), and generally was a bore who thought we were playing mad max or something, and went on and on about Ugee Own or something like that.

leper0messiah
2010-07-27, 12:13 AM
When that incident in the OP happened, I was 16 (The group DM) and "Tim" was 34. So, you fail at stereotypes.
don't mock my stereotypes! That's so stereotypical! Gang up on the leper...:smallannoyed:

:smalltongue:

although in my defense all the teenage boys I played with were usually pervs. 'Cept one who was a rageaholic and one who was the classic "watcher"...wait...what was a 34 year old doin' with you guys anyway:smalleek:

Savannah
2010-07-27, 12:20 AM
...wait...what was a 34 year old doin' with you guys anyway:smalleek:

I've played in a group that ranged from 10ish (can't remember how old she was when we started) to late 30s/early 40s. Nothing :smalleek:-worthy about that. :smallconfused:

(That said, both players who made me want to pull my hair out were males 13-16 years old, so I can sorta see leper's point. Of course, there were players in that same demographic who were perfectly nice.)

Dubious Pie
2010-07-27, 12:42 AM
...what was a 34 year old doin' with you guys anyway:smalleek:

The youngest member of that group was 15 (My younger brother) and the oldest was 45, with the majority at the two ends.

Satyr
2010-07-27, 01:38 AM
We had once a player in one of our groups who had a tendency for huge double standards and shouted in a public place that me and one player tried to rape her - because something happened to her character (it was even something bad).

In the game we played (The Dark Eye), it was a fairly new group and most players didn't know each other very well. So, two characters had started on the wrong foot from the beginning. One of them, the party's intellectual was a priest of the setting's god of righteousness, law, sun, justice and the inquisition, one of the most authoritarian (and therefore among players most unpopular cults in the game), the other character was a young hedonist rogue, who was in truth an incognito witch.

The priest and the swashbuckler-witch bickered regularly while I ran the game; most of the time it was mostly harmless (and I don't think that a conflict on the character level is a problem at all, as long as it remains on the character level). At one point the group came to the consent,that skill rolls on social skills were completely sufficient and did not needed to be roleplayed; I was against this but the majority - including the witch's player - was in favor of this rule, so we ran with it.

Now, after a longer argument about what to do with some captured bandits (all of the group with one exception were in favor of bringing them to the local noble who should judge about them, the witch instead wanted to kill them, so they were no trouble anymore), the witch casted a sleep spell on the group and cut the throat of the captives while the rest of the group were asleep. This was not the first spell she used on group members to manipulate them, but most of the time, the result was pretty harmless most of the time, so while it was a nuisance, it wasn't really bad.

On the next day, the priest decided that this was wrong and took the young witch for a lecture. More out of fun he meant that he tried to convert her by showing her the greatness of his god's way, rolled for his skill on this - and succeeded marvelously. In the rules we used, a magnificent success is absolutely rare. It is rolling three natural 1's in a row, and I have seen it happen exactly three times in the 15+ years I am playing this game.
So, according to the rule the player favored herself, the witch was now converted - which lead to a fit from the player which was well worthy for a four year old. She screamed at us - me and the priest's player - that we would try to ruin her character and that it was completely intolerable that a player character's actions were controlled by anyone else but the player, and then she stormed out.

The next day, I tried to get the group back together for a discussion about it; so we met in our favorite bar and tried to discuss it. The player of the witch came a bit late, so that we others had already talked about it a bit and came unisono to the opinion that she was applying an enormous double-standard and was slightly annoying in general. When she came to the discussion, she screamed at the priest's player almost immediately and shouted several times - in a public place that he "tried to rape her character" and later and even louder that "we tried to rape me." In a public place we frequently visited. Over a silly character in a silly roleplaying game.
If anyone had taken her serious (which gladfully nobody did) that could have become a lot worse.

RE:Insanity
2010-07-27, 01:46 AM
We had once a player in one of our groups who had a tendency for huge double standards and shouted in a public place that me and one player tried to rape her - because something happened to her character (it was even something bad).

In the game we played (The Dark Eye), it was a fairly new group and most players didn't know each other very well. So, two characters had started on the wrong foot from the beginning. One of them, the party's intellectual was a priest of the setting's god of righteousness, law, sun, justice and the inquisition, one of the most authoritarian (and therefore among players most unpopular cults in the game), the other character was a young hedonist rogue, who was in truth an incognito witch.

The priest and the swashbuckler-witch bickered regularly while I ran the game; most of the time it was mostly harmless (and I don't think that a conflict on the character level is a problem at all, as long as it remains on the character level). At one point the group came to the consent,that skill rolls on social skills were completely sufficient and did not needed to be roleplayed; I was against this but the majority - including the witch's player - was in favor of this rule, so we ran with it.

Now, after a longer argument about what to do with some captured bandits (all of the group with one exception were in favor of bringing them to the local noble who should judge about them, the witch instead wanted to kill them, so they were no trouble anymore), the witch casted a sleep spell on the group and cut the throat of the captives while the rest of the group were asleep. This was not the first spell she used on group members to manipulate them, but most of the time, the result was pretty harmless most of the time, so while it was a nuisance, it wasn't really bad.

On the next day, the priest decided that this was wrong and took the young witch for a lecture. More out of fun he meant that he tried to convert her by showing her the greatness of his god's way, rolled for his skill on this - and succeeded marvelously. In the rules we used, a magnificent success is absolutely rare. It is rolling three natural 1's in a row, and I have seen it happen exactly three times in the 15+ years I am playing this game.
So, according to the rule the player favored herself, the witch was now converted - which lead to a fit from the player which was well worthy for a four year old. She screamed at us - me and the priest's player - that we would try to ruin her character and that it was completely intolerable that a player character's actions were controlled by anyone else but the player, and then she stormed out.

The next day, I tried to get the group back together for a discussion about it; so we met in our favorite bar and tried to discuss it. The player of the witch came a bit late, so that we others had already talked about it a bit and came unisono to the opinion that she was applying an enormous double-standard and was slightly annoying in general. When she came to the discussion, she screamed at the priest's player almost immediately and shouted several times - in a public place that he "tried to rape her character" and later and even louder that "we tried to rape me." In a public place we frequently visited. Over a silly character in a silly roleplaying game.
If anyone had taken her serious (which gladfully nobody did) that could have become a lot worse.

Crazy lady!

icefractal
2010-07-27, 01:53 AM
Effin creepy.Indeed.

My policy for those types of players (if straight-up booting isn't desirable) is telling them to "get your d*** off the table". Crude, but the advantage is it's pretty much appropriate no matter why they're acting that way.
* For the lulz? Well now the joke's on them, and hopefully they'll be embarrassed and drop it.
* Very oblivious? Notifies them that it's unacceptable.
* Perv, thinking they're flying under the radar? Calls them on it.
* Perv, thinking it's somehow acceptable? Now they know that won't fly.

They claim it's about freedom to play their character? Fine. Nothing says that character has to meet the rest of the party, or have any game time spent on them. Although at this point you may as well boot them and save the trouble.

Lupian
2010-07-27, 02:13 AM
Well, seeing all these horror stories, I suddenly feel lucky that I didn't really meet any of these wierdos.

On the other side, I was only in two groups, and am DMing solely my brother, sister, and (rarely) some other friends.

Anyway, the only bad players I had were some guy who was totally 'cliched', one can say- the DM told us were in a town, so the player said he's going to the local tavern and looks for shady guys(Sheesh). The other player in said group, an idiotic barbarian(in and outside of the game) decided his character has GOT to be stupid, so he decided to give him an intilligence score of 4(although he rolled a 9), and do crap all the time("I pull down my pants and wink towards the wierd lady with the axe" was the wierdest thus far).

And that crappy DM didn't follow any rules- my ranger could use a longsword and a dagger(crap), rolling attack only a single time and dealing 1d8+1 damage each time, without acctualy calculating in my strength score, which was 18.

Which leaves me saying only one thing about that goddamned DM and his DMing style:



"THE HELL DO YOU MEAN BY 'THE DRAGON LICKS MY ASS'?!?"

Starfols
2010-07-27, 02:26 AM
*eyetwitch*

Dude stuck his hand down his pants. Repeatedly. And liberally scratched himself. Repeatedly. And I'm not talking scratching his waist or anything. I mean, Wizard's player saw him sticking his hand all the way down his underpants. Disturbing, right? It gets worse. Because you see, that whole game, That Guy had been playing with the dice. The dice we were all using. Just... rulling them around in his hands, rubbing them, balancing them, et cetera. All while scratching himself between "dice boredom" moments.

*eyetwitch*[/spoiler]

My poor dice were baptized in Germ-X. And he was never invited back to another game.

That sounds like half my gaming group. I lost my dice, so I just use an online roller to avoid that. :smallsigh:

Anyway, I've got 3:

The first one was rolling a lvl 18 human cleric, and didn't know what feats to take, so he took improved toughness 9 times. He ended up with I ~700 hp, iirc.

The second made a sorcerer, and continually used AoE spells on the party, because he forgot friendly fire was on. :smallmad: He eventually died, and got reincarnated (we didn't have a cleric). He didn't like his form, so he had himself killed and reincarnated again. 4 times. :smallsigh:

The second also made the worst character I have ever seen.
Str: 15
Dex: 12
Con: 18
Int: 8
Wis: 12
Cha: 16 (to pick up the chicks)
He was a dwarf monk. :smallsigh:

The last one takes a bit more explaining.

In one of my campaigns, which albeit, had a high casualty rate (being survival/horror) died every single session. every. single. one. I didn't want to make his levels go down because I felt bad for him. :smallfrown:

In another campaign (not run by me) He started as a ranger, then went into assassin. So far, so good. Then his animal companion died, and instead of reviving it, he took a level of druid. Then he got jealous of my psion, and added in a level of psychic warrior. I think there were a couple other classes, but it was bad.

The worst thing got him kicked out of a house:
He came into a campaign a little later than everyone else, which isn't a problem. He rolled a tsundere swashbuckler girl, going into dread pirate. I had him have a boat, and some crew members, then had him encounter the rest of the party. The ninja (one of the first members of the party, and the friendliest) approached her in friendship. She refused, on the grounds that he was a ninja. Ninja said something about the power of friendship, and the pirate responded by challenging him to a duel.

They fought, and it was very close, but the ninja won because he played cleverly. The ninja offered friendship once more (defeat means friendship, right?) and she again refused, but unable to attack him, and noticeably harboring a grudge against him.

They headed to the nearest town to resupply, and it was brought to their attention that one of the big bads had called out a hit on them. One of the assassins approached them, and said that the they didn't really want to kill the party, as it's a lot of hard work, and kind of a raw deal. So, the party offered to buy off the assassin, and gave him a big stack of gold. The party then went on their merry way, except pirate girl, who went back and stole some of the gold, right in front of the assassin. The assassin said she had one more chance to give it back, and pirate swallowed the coins, and started running away. The assassins caught up to her and killed her, then went after the other party members, who parleyed and gave them the gold pirate had stolen.

Pirate's player then started shouting at the top of his lungs about how ninja's player was cheating in that duel, and his character shouldn't have died, and how the rest of the party should have helped, as well as some other things I won't repeat.

He's tried to kill ninja's player's characters in every campaign they've been in, failing every single time.

He was later kicked from the group entirely due to hygene/social issues.

Vitruviansquid
2010-07-27, 03:52 AM
I feel like we need more than that to call this guy bad; based solely on that, I'd say he was making a joke and perhaps you took it too seriously.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying he's a bad player. In fact, I can confidently say he's a rather good player. I'm just relating what happens when someone brings sex to our table.

My worst player story is pretty tame. We had a guy play who we all knew and were friends with who never read the rule book, always needed help rolling his characters, and gave us all the impression he wasn't really into the game, but was just playing to be "a part of the group." Overall, though, his ignorance of the rules didn't actually slow the game down that much, and I would really rather have been playing with him than any of the worsts in this thread.

Destro_Yersul
2010-07-27, 03:55 AM
Well...

We're playing Dark Heresy, and one of the characters is a psyker. The player of the psyker is, while not an idiot, not the sort to listen to anything we said. He's also hearing voices (the character) and wants to kill us all for no discernible reason (the player).

so we're in an apartment building. We're attempting to buy some Frenzon on the black market, because the arbitrator of the group wants to bust a bunch of the black market people. 5 guys show up to the meeting, and we don't know who the boss is. Psyker and I go up to negotiate.

Everyone's packed pretty tightly together. Psyker says 'I cast Holocaust.'

for those who don't know, Holocaust is a power that deals d10 times Willpower Bonus damage to everyone in its radius. No damage reduction, no save, no nothing. Psyker has, through munchkinry, got a WP bonus of 6. Your average character has 10HP. He obliterates all 5 guys, the suitcase of Frenzon, and would have got all the characters too if we hadn't burnt fate points.

This isn't the worst of what he's done. At one point he mind-controlled my character because he could. This spawned a plot to kill him by the other characters, mine included, which failed because he metagamed and so knew we were coming.

Eventually, we get the Inquisitor to put a limiter on him. If he abuses his powers, it'll zap him and prevent him from using them any more. The techpriest tries to take it off, because it's shiny and he wants a closer look at it. the guardsman starts telling him off for this, because of all the trouble it could cause. Psyker decides that now would be a good time to mind-control the guardsman, in order to get him to do what he's already doing. Limiter zaps him, and now he can't use his powers.

The only one upset about this is him.

Lycan 01
2010-07-27, 04:01 AM
You're doing it wrong. A Psyker who abuses his powers and mind controls other people without their permission or a good reason is a Heretic. A Psyker who attacks other Inquisitors and mission-centric personel, or otherwise sabotaging the mission, is a Traitor. ANYONE WHO HEARS VOICES IN THEIR HEAD HAS BEEN CORRUPTED BY CHAOS. :smalleek:


This man is dead three times over. By order of the Ordo Hereticus, and for the glory of the Imperium of Man, you must to wipe him from existance. :smallcool:



No seriously. Don't put up with that crap. Dark Herey is a serious setting, and he's literally doing stuff that your character is supposed to get killed for. Bring it up with the GM, talk to the other players about it, and then kill him in the name of the Emperor to get some brownie points with your Inquisitor. :smallamused:

Destro_Yersul
2010-07-27, 04:43 AM
We tried. And yeah, he's totally been corrupted by chaos. I think most of the party has in some way or other at this point. It's a much less serious game, despite the setting, and we really wouldn't mind this so much if it wasn't stupid as hell, IC and OOC, for him to do some of the stuff he does.

The other two DH games I'm in (running one, playing another) are much more serious. This one is a beer and pretzels deal. The only real problem I have is that this stuff A: bogs down the game, and B: makes it less fun.

Lycan 01
2010-07-27, 04:46 AM
I still say kill him for brownie points with the Inquisitor. :smalltongue:

I mean, you're all corrupted. So kill the odd-man-out and throw suspicion off yourself. Or at least get some nifty XP. Buy some Torpour during a down-time, then shank him with it. Ta-da! Easy target.

akma
2010-07-27, 06:27 AM
In my last post I forgot about a forum game I was in (not this forum) that included two guys playing women.
Stereotypically, they played like total whores. It was more felt with one player, that rolled seduction every post he made in the game. Every single one.
In the bright side, it was funny.
And for demographic/stereotype accuracy measurment/something like that, he was 13 or 11, I`m not sure, and was bad at spelling.

Psyx
2010-07-27, 06:55 AM
He did get kicked out after he was caught violating a toilet paper tube in the bathroom during a session.



Just... You win.

nyarlathotep
2010-07-27, 07:07 AM
The worst thing got him kicked out of a house:
He came into a campaign a little later than everyone else, which isn't a problem. He rolled a tsundere swashbuckler girl, going into dread pirate. I had him have a boat, and some crew members, then had him encounter the rest of the party. The ninja (one of the first members of the party, and the friendliest) approached her in friendship. She refused, on the grounds that he was a ninja. Ninja said something about the power of friendship, and the pirate responded by challenging him to a duel.

They fought, and it was very close, but the ninja won because he played cleverly. The ninja offered friendship once more (defeat means friendship, right?) and she again refused, but unable to attack him, and noticeably harboring a grudge against him.

They headed to the nearest town to resupply, and it was brought to their attention that one of the big bads had called out a hit on them. One of the assassins approached them, and said that the they didn't really want to kill the party, as it's a lot of hard work, and kind of a raw deal. So, the party offered to buy off the assassin, and gave him a big stack of gold. The party then went on their merry way, except pirate girl, who went back and stole some of the gold, right in front of the assassin. The assassin said she had one more chance to give it back, and pirate swallowed the coins, and started running away. The assassins caught up to her and killed her, then went after the other party members, who parleyed and gave them the gold pirate had stolen.

Pirate's player then started shouting at the top of his lungs about how ninja's player was cheating in that duel, and his character shouldn't have died, and how the rest of the party should have helped, as well as some other things I won't repeat.

He's tried to kill ninja's player's characters in every campaign they've been in, failing every single time.

He was later kicked from the group entirely due to hygene/social issues.

Good times.

Forgot to mention that his characters also had a frightening tendency to commit suicide when one of his plans failed.

HamHam
2010-07-27, 09:21 AM
Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying he's a bad player. In fact, I can confidently say he's a rather good player. I'm just relating what happens when someone brings sex to our table.

References to terrible 80s songs doesn't really count as that.

Dubious Pie
2010-07-27, 09:50 AM
... He did get kicked out after he was caught violating a toilet paper tube in the bathroom during a session.

.... Say what? ...
I don't know, I was not there that time. I will not ask. I will never think about that again.


Just... You win.

Thank you, Psyx.

Gnaeus
2010-07-27, 09:56 AM
Player X comes into an existing game with his GF. X has made his own character as well as his GF's.

Party is fairly optimized tier 4 (Rogue/Daring outlaw, Charge Barbarian, Archer Ranger, Arcane Hierophant (me). X's characters are badly built Tier 5s. He played a Warmage/Cleric, who I had to BEG to take Mystic Theurge instead of continuing to alternate Wmg and Cleric levels, and then had to BEG to take Practiced Spellcaster (I was concerned because there isn't really a good role for a wmg 4/cleric 4 in a group with a Wiz (focused spec conjurer) 3/Druid 4/AH 3, and I didn't want to rebuild my existing character to make him look better). The GF was a Dragon Shaman with badly chosen feats.

So then this guy, with his amazing level of rules mastery, proceeds to berate his own GF every game about how she doesn't understand the rules, and isn't using the character he built for her well. Very uncomfortable.

Coplantor
2010-07-27, 10:11 AM
Well, never had an bad player. One of em' just keeps forgetting the rules as in not knowing wich die to roll (it is always the d20 :smalltongue:), he got better.

Then there was my brother, who was a good player when he was 13, he played the best paladin I've seen, risking his life to ridiculous ammounts just to save a nameless NPC who was actually there to die but he actually saved him. The bad part? Well, a year after that, he just fell asleep every session. It stoped being fun for him :smallfrown:

Then I had a GM that was a bit over obssesed with sex. We were going to play a V:tM game and I wanted to be the smart guy, I was planning to play a computer geek/hacker vampire. When I was told we were going to play in the middle ages I switched to a mercyful knowledge seeker catholic priest.

From there on he kept on picking on my character with any sort of sexual stuff he could think. Made the party roll for sexuality, apparently my priest was a pansexual (even if I told him that my character had no sexual desire he kept telling me that it was not that way).

I missed one session and apparently my character got raped and was willingful involved in some sort of orgy.

I was not entirely angry since we had fun and it was just a game but, that's not what I expect from a GM... at all.

mikej
2010-07-27, 11:20 AM
I DM 3.5e D&D. I had one player "Tim", who would only play female elf Wu-Jens. Wu-Jens have to take certain player created "taboos". The problem is that "Tim" was a massive pervert. Here are some jems:

Must not bathe.
Must eat only meat that has been left in the feces of the type animal that it came from for at least a week.
Must not wear clothes.
Must eat only own excrement and drink only own urine.
Must eat vomit-inducing plants at all meals, followed by eating the vomit.



facepalm*

I usually play female characters but this guy just adds to the negative stereotype of "guy being a pervert with opposite sex" character. A good female character can greatly add and diversify what would normally be a full "male" cast in terms of story/roleplayer. Mind you, I do play male characters just as well.

As for worse players, I can't really say much. Should count myself lucky.

FlyingWhale
2010-07-27, 12:15 PM
Since it would be wrong of me to post this person's address, social security number, phone number, all email addresses, license number and plate tag number, VIN, credit card number, full name and all aliases, pictures, and precise daily/weekly routine here... this will have to suffice.

We will call this PlayerLC. He now holds in my list, the worst. Before I had quite a list. Put them all together and then take a huge dump in that mix, then blend it and serve it up al a mode to Tim and let him recycle it a few dozen times... LC.

Just a few examples, always sings a combination of showtunes, cartoon songs, and bop. Laughs something akin to dragging a rake across a chalkboard then putting a few babies in a paint can shaker at the Home Depot, crossed with a million microphones backfeeding. Slurps everything, soup, water, soda, pizza, chips, air...

Urinates on the floor, toilet and carpet which the entire group of other players would demand he clean it (which I would force him to while we all watched), spill food or drink and make him clean it all up (again while everyone watched and forced him to), always draw anthro-hentai-porn-men-things which he claimed gave him inspiration for what kind of clothing they would wear saying he would later erase all the graphic parts and draw clothes (which he never does), always make references to TV, Movie, or out-dated commercials, speaks in a tone which makes dogs cry,

Does not bathe but rather uses, THIS IS THE IMPORTANT PART!!! ONE... uno, one! 1, baby wipe to wipe after stool AND "bathe" with. After "wiping-bathing" he would let himself air dry and put his same dirty clothes back on with the logic that "The clothes dont get dirty, the body does." Always speak about how bad the system the US has for employment, education, governing bodies, medical care, military and every other aspect of life, always comparing and contrasting between our modern society and that of ancient Euro-Druidism culture...

States 100% fact the Dark Ages as being one of the single greatest accomplishments of the AD world in the fact that it "dealt a great deal to the pursuit of learning and science which is the downfall of humanity because it causes conflict religion and death"...

This list goes on and on for days. Why do we keep him around? His characters are sooo much fun to watch. And to be fair, the above is why HE is the worst player ever... His characters on the other hand...

Always an Anthro character which is a single rare type of species with maybe several hundred world wide and serves as direct consorts, diplomats, or guards to Gods. Argues with all authority, party or NPC. Always fights everything, one time a town guard told him not to interrupt when the mayor speaks, so he spit on the guard and told him to go to the nine hells and rot and die, the guard arrested him, he tried to punch the guard, the guards beat him, he then tries to kill his captors which leads to his death. We all spend the next hour explaining that you cant go around spitting and cursing 12th level guards when you are level 5 and lawful good...or any level for that matter if you expect to come out alive...

Always insults nobles, guards, other PCs, and ALL NPCs... dies on average of once per session, sometimes more, but unbelievably this most recent set of characters has lasted... 3 characters in 9 sessions. Go figure. Once was a leader of an enslaving dragon race that entered the native lands of the enslaved people (they were escapees) then complained for hours when he was brutally and savagely murdered on sight by the several thousand yuan-ti...at level 4...

This is all fun and good but I need to work more for sunday, our next session! ciao:smallbiggrin:

Also, some of you folks have some real winners back there... As for the arm breaker almoster... I woulda snapped his spine:smallamused:

The Mute Bard
2010-07-27, 12:45 PM
Ah, PlayerLC :smallannoyed:...How will he die next? :smalltongue:

hewhosaysfish
2010-07-27, 12:55 PM
All grossness aside (and there is enough grossness that it may take a team of men with wheelbarrows to put it aside) hasn't "Tim" painted himself into a bit of a corner?


Must eat only meat that has been left in the feces of the type animal that it came from for at least a week...
Must eat only own excrement...


Unless his character poops small animals, he she can't technically eat anything.
Although under the circumstances, I'm not going to dismiss the possibility that maybe the character could poop small animals.... Or indeed Huge Animals...

Lupian
2010-07-27, 01:10 PM
Just noticed this one now, and it reminded of my only real horror story:


Dude stuck his hand down his pants. Repeatedly. And liberally scratched himself. Repeatedly. And I'm not talking scratching his waist or anything. I mean, Wizard's player saw him sticking his hand all the way down his underpants. Disturbing, right? It gets worse. Because you see, that whole game, That Guy had been playing with the dice. The dice we were all using. Just... rulling them around in his hands, rubbing them, balancing them, et cetera. All while scratching himself between "dice boredom" moments.

It reminded me of the one and only, the horrible guy calling himself 'bobby'(or something like that, but seriously...), who always took part in that 11 players group I was in for 2 session; He constantly stared at us(we were a group solely made of guys, btw), each time focusing both eyes on the center of someone pants. The 'Effing' center :smalleek:.

Anyway, at the second session in which I took part, he started scratching his goddamn ass, and I seriously mean it- he stuck his hand in his pants, and scratched, making disturbing "aaaah..." sounds(:smallyuk:), and pulling his hand out after around 4 minutes each time, and we all got to so his GLORIOUS(spelling?) bulls--t....

*releases puke bomb*

Seriously, it was disgusting. And somehow he even wet himself in the middle of the second session, which was the 'breaking point', I guess....blech

Math_Mage
2010-07-27, 01:25 PM
All grossness aside (and there is enough grossness that it may take a team of men with wheelbarrows to put it aside) hasn't "Tim" painted himself into a bit of a corner?



Unless his character poops small animals, he she can't technically eat anything.
Although under the circumstances, I'm not going to dismiss the possibility that maybe the character could poop small animals.... Or indeed Huge Animals...

These were separate taboos for each character, from what I read.

Holocron Coder
2010-07-27, 01:30 PM
All grossness aside (and there is enough grossness that it may take a team of men with wheelbarrows to put it aside) hasn't "Tim" painted himself into a bit of a corner?



Unless his character poops small animals, he she can't technically eat anything.
Although under the circumstances, I'm not going to dismiss the possibility that maybe the character could poop small animals.... Or indeed Huge Animals...

Actually, if you really read that correctly...
...
...The character can only eat themselves.

WarKitty
2010-07-27, 01:31 PM
All grossness aside (and there is enough grossness that it may take a team of men with wheelbarrows to put it aside) hasn't "Tim" painted himself into a bit of a corner?



Must eat only own excrement and drink only own urine.

Unless his character poops small animals, he she can't technically eat anything.
Although under the circumstances, I'm not going to dismiss the possibility that maybe the character could poop small animals.... Or indeed Huge Animals...

This one by itself would mean she can't eat anything. Since I presume the player *does* know why excrement and urine are produced?

FlyingWhale
2010-07-27, 01:41 PM
Just noticed this one now, and it reminded of my only real horror story:



It reminded me of the one and only, the horrible guy calling himself 'bobby'(or something like that, but seriously...), who always took part in that 11 players group I was in for 2 session; He constantly stared at us(we were a group solely made of guys, btw), each time focusing both eyes on the center of someone pants. The 'Effing' center :smalleek:.

Anyway, at the second session in which I took part, he started scratching his goddamn ass, and I seriously mean it- he stuck his hand in his pants, and scratched, making disturbing "aaaah..." sounds(:smallyuk:), and pulling his hand out after around 4 minutes each time, and we all got to so his GLORIOUS(spelling?) bulls--t....

*releases puke bomb*

Seriously, it was disgusting. And somehow he even wet himself in the middle of the second session, which was the 'breaking point', I guess....blech

Surely this was no man... And by man I mean human... We had a group over one time and the guest DM's girlfriend thing was staring at BritishBill the entirety of the 8 hour session... She smelled like a fresh, spring rose... That had been submerged in loose stool and left to decompose in the cadaver of a skunk... She looked something like an ogre, but much shorter... Blond hair, blue eyes, two of the most beautiful chins a woman ever has had... Her name was Christine. One day I will meet a Christine who is not in fact a beached whale dead three times over... Til then...

We ordered pizza... she just stared at BritishBill and his slices, she didn't pay anything or ask for food when we passed the menu around and her boyfriend/DM didn't pay or order either, but her ravenous eyes wanted only two things, BritishBill and his pizza... The only thing worse than all this was the way she kept her hands folded in her lap, one in her pants and the other directly over the zipper... No matter how hard I scrub, my eyes just wont come clean...

Any chance of feedback on my Player LC??? I wanna know other people's opinions on him... Sometimes I feel too mean, but then I rethink how this list should be 5x longer...

Savannah
2010-07-27, 02:04 PM
Any chance of feedback on my Player LC??? I wanna know other people's opinions on him... Sometimes I feel too mean, but then I rethink how this list should be 5x longer...

I'd have booted him ages ago. No amount of funny characters make up for that.

Trasilor
2010-07-27, 02:06 PM
While I admit, I have never had the "joy" of playing with a "Tim" or "LC", there is one player in my group that always bugs me...

He always seems to make subpar characters from tier 5, sometimes tier 4. While this is not bad, at somepoint during combat, his character becomes useless or about to die...the solution: groin-shot (he calls it something else).

This happens everytime. Deepwood sniper about to get stopped by a giant? Groin-shot. Rogue about to mauled by a dire bear? Groin-shot. Swashbuckler fending off a Troll? You guessed it.

What is really sad, is that he comes up with these involved character concepts and backstories that would be amazing if he just stuck with the character. But, the instant he thinks his character will die, he turns them into a "joke character" there for comic relief and that is how he meant to play them all along.

He and I started in AD&D 2E where character death was a major drawback, I just wish he would really learn that character death in 3.5 is very different.

Lupian
2010-07-27, 02:31 PM
Surely this was no man... And by man I mean human... We had a group over one time and the guest DM's girlfriend thing was staring at BritishBill the entirety of the 8 hour session... She smelled like a fresh, spring rose... That had been submerged in loose stool and left to decompose in the cadaver of a skunk... She looked something like an ogre, but much shorter... Blond hair, blue eyes, two of the most beautiful chins a woman ever has had... Her name was Christine. One day I will meet a Christine who is not in fact a beached whale dead three times over... Til then...

We ordered pizza... she just stared at BritishBill and his slices, she didn't pay anything or ask for food when we passed the menu around and her boyfriend/DM didn't pay or order either, but her ravenous eyes wanted only two things, BritishBill and his pizza... The only thing worse than all this was the way she kept her hands folded in her lap, one in her pants and the other directly over the zipper... No matter how hard I scrub, my eyes just wont come clean...

Any chance of feedback on my Player LC??? I wanna know other people's opinions on him... Sometimes I feel too mean, but then I rethink how this list should be 5x longer...

Well, that Player LC sure is wierd.... Anyway, thanks for answering my 'rant' of sorts. Come to think of it, it seems like he's a shameless A-hole who has no sense of respect whatsovever towards others, and his 'superiors'- that is, the DM.

on a side note, that MCogre girl sure is creepy... Next time you meet her, give her a pizza with some xykon dust *stupid pun tiem*

Anyway, I wish(for you) you won't meet her again. I really do.

:smalltongue:

FlyingWhale
2010-07-27, 02:33 PM
While I admit, I have never had the "joy" of playing with a "Tim" or "LC", there is one player in my group that always bugs me...

He always seems to make subpar characters from tier 5, sometimes tier 4. While this is not bad, at somepoint during combat, his character becomes useless or about to die...the solution: groin-shot (he calls it something else).

This happens everytime. Deepwood sniper about to get stopped by a giant? Groin-shot. Rogue about to mauled by a dire bear? Groin-shot. Swashbuckler fending off a Troll? You guessed it.

What is really sad, is that he comes up with these involved character concepts and backstories that would be amazing if he just stuck with the character. But, the instant he thinks his character will die, he turns them into a "joke character" there for comic relief and that is how he meant to play them all along.

He and I started in AD&D 2E where character death was a major drawback, I just wish he would really learn that character death in 3.5 is very different.

Dear, sweet Heironeous... That is LC! Does he cry like a baby everytime it turns into death anyway?

@Savannah
I'd have booted him ages ago. No amount of funny characters make up for that.
I DID mess something up then... I meant, HE is funny, as in, we all make fun of him from 10AM til 8PM or whenever we wrap up the session... Oops. :) And we did get into several bits where I almost beat him to a pulp. I'm like Vin Diesel in a way... Avid D&D fan, ever since childhood, but I wouldn't hesitate to bend a parking meter over someone's skull... Arghh:smallwink:

@ Lupian~~~ But of course! I need to remember more often to actually include the person I'm speaking after lol. I might seem like a selfish jerkwad otherwise hehe:smalltongue: Another question, actually, two technically... Are you familiar with the D&D archetypes? I.E. Rules Lawyers, Fat beards, Munchkins etc etc... If so, which was this guy? I knew one similar, very similar... He was a cross between a (terribly bad at it) Munchkin and a (blatant and bad) Grudge Monster. Sigh... and Actually, I hope I meet her again, and yes feed her pizza, but no, I will drug BritishBill and top the pizza with him :smallbiggrin:

Savannah
2010-07-27, 02:46 PM
I DID mess something up then... I meant, HE is funny, as in, we all make fun of him from 10AM til 8PM or whenever we wrap up the session... Oops. :) And we did get into several bits where I almost beat him to a pulp. I'm like Vin Diesel in a way... Avid D&D fan, ever since childhood, but I wouldn't hesitate to bend a parking meter over someone's skull... Arghh:smallwink:

I am strongly biased towards booting obnoxious players after some experiences I've had, which will affect my comments.

Now, if you enjoy his company more than he annoys you, that's fine - I'm judging solely based on what you've said. On the other hand, if you're keeping him in the group despite his faults because you like making fun of him, that doesn't sound very healthy for anyone involved. *shrugs* You know the situation better than I do, so you're the only one who can judge.

Choco
2010-07-27, 02:48 PM
I played with a guy who was new to pen and paper roleplaying but had been freeforming for a while. Some fun experiences with that one:

He did not even understand/learn enough of the rules to run his own characters. He just described whatever action he thought would be cool and let the DM and rules lawyers sort it out. When told to read the rules to know exactly what he can do, he cried he didn't have that kind of time.

This lead to him trying to do horribly useless things in combat like grabbing and throwing a guy 5 feet as opposed to full attack killing him. Thats cool when out of combat and trying to intimidate someone, but everyone else in our group was actively trying to win combats as opposed to being flashy and ended up carrying our weight in addition to his.

He picked tier 4/5 classes and always managed to find prestige classes that make the base class worse, and then complained that he felt underpowered.

After we got sick of that, we all created new characters and the rest of us made sure to make our characters mechanically weaker than his (he refused to allow anyone to make his character for him, or even give build advice, cause it is *his* character). Even this failed because he did not play to his characters strengths and still ended up the weakest (rogue who VERY rarely took advantage of sneak attack). He then flew into a rage when we showed him how if he played the character like he himself had designed, it would be more powerful than ours. He was crying that he will play his character however he wants and he will not change his character to suit us, etc.

His characters were all complete *******s and were constantly picking fights with a select few party members and most NPC's, and just generally very liberal about the application of mass quantities of verbal abuse. When one of the party members got pissed and KO'd (not killed) his ass he cried about that too, saying we should not be fighting, they should handle it via RP, etc. When the other guy said his character had a bad enough temper that he SHOULD have done that sessions ago, he complained about the other guy making character incompatible with the rest of the party.

His characters had 8-10 charisma, and the party had a face. Yet every time an RP encounter rolled along, he was the first to talk and refused to give up the spotlight. He was basically the acting party face, bullying the previous face out of a job. Then when diplomacy rolls had to be made, he looked at the REAL party face and said something like "Hey you got all the charisma, shouldn't you be handling this?"

He whined extensively that the resident powergamer outshined him in combat, but got all defensive when the rest of us got tired of him hogging 95% of the RP time, in addition to his insistance on splitting away from the party "cause that is what his character would do" and going on solo quests (and then of course being impatient when the DM was covering what the rest of the party is doing).

Yeah, I am somewhat glad I moved and found a new group :smalltongue:

Lupian
2010-07-27, 02:49 PM
@ Lupian~~~ But of course! I need to remember more often to actually include the person I'm speaking after lol. I might seem like a selfish jerkwad otherwise hehe:smalltongue: Another question, actually, two technically... Are you familiar with the D&D archetypes? I.E. Rules Lawyers, Fat beards, Munchkins etc etc... If so, which was this guy? I knew one similar, very similar... He was a cross between a (terribly bad at it) Munchkin and a (blatant and bad) Grudge Monster. Sigh... and Actually, I hope I meet her again, and yes feed her pizza, but no, I will drug BritishBill and top the pizza with him :smallbiggrin:

P.S. Who's that BritishBillGates anyway?

Well, I think he's a munchkin... these guys who make crap with their characters, right?("MY WIZARD STABS TEH DWAGON IN DA NUTS")
I could use a refreshment about these 'classes', that is, archetypes, though.

While Im quite familiar with internet speech, I don't know a damn about DND internet speech.
So much for spending all of my free time on creating dungeons and sending my brother's and sister's character inside, only to find them rolling 20 natural 20's in a row and killing a big sized red dragon, being two players with +1 weapons and a str score of 10(sis) and 12(bro).

FlyingWhale
2010-07-27, 03:01 PM
P.S. Who's that BritishBillGates anyway?

Well, I think he's a munchkin... these guys who make crap with their characters, right?("MY WIZARD STABS TEH DWAGON IN DA NUTS")
I could use a refreshment about these 'classes', that is, archetypes, though.

While Im quite familiar with internet speech, I don't know a damn about DND internet speech.
So much for spending all of my free time on creating dungeons and sending my brother's and sister's character inside, only to find them rolling 20 natural 20's in a row and killing a big sized red dragon, being two players with +1 weapons and a str score of 10(sis) and 12(bro).

A Munchkin is kind of a power-gamer. Their characters are the strongest and usually most broken (legally or illegally) stacked characters.

A Rules Lawyer is well, just that. They suck the fun from the game.

A Fat Beard is kinda like that of their name as well... Think of the Comic Book guy in the Simpsons...

It's good to hear about you playing with your siblings, my best players are my best buddy (BritishBill and cousin TheMuteBard) hehe It does get old with that internet talk...

Mystic Muse
2010-07-27, 03:04 PM
Thank you all for making me feel like a better player and making the problems my group has seem like nothing.

Savannah
2010-07-27, 03:07 PM
A Munchkin is kind of a power-gamer. Their characters are the strongest and usually most broken (legally or illegally) stacked characters.

Slight clarification, based on my understanding of those terms:

Power gamers build strong characters because they like to be powerful. They are unlikely to cheat, as they want to be as strong as they can be using the system.

Munchkins build strong characters because they like to win. They want to be better than the other players, and "beat" the DM by crushing every encounter. They are more likely to cheat, as they want to be the best.

Lupian
2010-07-27, 03:08 PM
A Munchkin is kind of a power-gamer. Their characters are the strongest and usually most broken (legally or illegally) stacked characters.

A Rules Lawyer is well, just that. They suck the fun from the game.

A Fat Beard is kinda like that of their name as well... Think of the Comic Book guy in the Simpsons...

It's good to hear about you playing with your siblings, my best players are my best buddy (BritishBill and cousin TheMuteBard) hehe It does get old with that internet talk...

Yea....'dunno', as they say. The guy didn't really do anything overpowered, or useful, since the DM decided to screw the rules using his money which meant my ranger had 5 Hp, a sword dealing 1d8+1 for wielding a dagger, and the big +0 from a str score of 18.

And im playing with my sibling since my bro(7) is desperate to play DND, and(especially on trips to outland), we have sessions of about 7 hours were they crit everything they meet- the werewolves, the gnolls, the ogre mage(CR is 2 above party level), and everything possible.

They rolled so many natural 20's it's enough to beat a level 20 BBEG....
ahem...

Anyway, they're lucky, and (sometimes) a little smart.
Anything you're gonna tell me about wierd DM/sessions you had?

("MY WIZAWD USES THE SUPA GAWDLY LAZ000000000R")

EDIT:
Thank you all for making me feel like a better player and making the problems my group has seem like nothing.

Im glad to hear- I mean, read that.

And be glad you didn' meet THE MAGNIFICENT BOBBY IN RAEG MODE :smallfurious:

*shivers and hugs the cat*

Coplantor
2010-07-27, 03:10 PM
Slight clarification, based on my understanding of those terms:

Power gamers build strong characters because they like to be powerful. They are unlikely to cheat, as they want to be as strong as they can be using the system.

Munchkins build strong characters because they like to win. They want to be better than the other players, and "beat" the DM by crushing every encounter. They are more likely to cheat, as they want to be the best.

As a power gamer and (mediocre) roleplayer I aprove of this post

Telonius
2010-07-27, 03:25 PM
A Fat Beard is kinda like that of their name as well... Think of the Comic Book guy in the Simpsons...

We had one of those in our group, until he took a job lifting boxes for a parcel delivery service. Now he's a Muscle Beard. He's also fairly short. We'd declare him an honorary Dwarf, except he always plays Warforged...

Choco
2010-07-27, 03:30 PM
We had one of those in our group, until he took a job lifting boxes for a parcel delivery service. Now he's a Muscle Beard. He's also fairly short. We'd declare him an honorary Dwarf, except he always plays Warforged...

A Warforged Dwarf then?

Caphi
2010-07-27, 03:32 PM
A Warforged Dwarf then?

Dwarforged.

Choco
2010-07-27, 03:34 PM
Dwarforged.

You win 10 internets. Whatever those are. Apparently you can win those though.

AtwasAwamps
2010-07-27, 03:34 PM
Dwarforged.

This is a pointless word. All dwarves are forged.

AtopTheMountain
2010-07-27, 03:53 PM
This is a pointless word. All dwarves are forged.

Not as pointless as WarDwarfed.

akma
2010-07-27, 04:02 PM
They rolled so many natural 20's it's enough to beat a level 20 BBEG....
ahem...


Maybe the die is unbalanced. Try switching to a diffrent d20, or test the current die by rolling it loads of times and writing how many times 20 comes up.

Dr.Epic
2010-07-27, 04:16 PM
Another time I was DMing a campaign. It was just sort of a spur of the moment thing since there was this HUGE blizzard and school was canceled for the week at my college. For days me and the PCs tried to convince our one friend to join but he kept say he had work, finally, when he does join, the first thing he does is turn against the PCs in combat. He was killed of course but still a jerk move.

The Glyphstone
2010-07-27, 04:20 PM
Another time I was DMing a campaign. It was just sort of a spur of the moment thing since there was this HUGE blizzard and school was canceled for the week at my college. For days me and the PCs tried to convince our one friend to join but he kept say he had work, finally, when he does join, the first thing he does is turn against the PCs in combat. He was killed of course but still a jerk move.

You're right, it was a jerk move, harassing him like that when he clearly didn't want to play. Good for him to figure out the quickest way to get back to his own fun.:smallmad:

Honestly, I can't fault him too badly, considering he repeatedly said he didn't want to play but kept getting asked to. You shouldn't be blaming him either, really - if he had said yes the first time and done this, he'd be in the wrong.

Beelzebub1111
2010-07-27, 04:23 PM
There are two players, one's pretty good with one major flaw, the other is just annoying.

The first is a good roleplayer, and a very good tactician, although he's very stubborn. Dead set on something he'll keep going, even to the detriment of everyone else.

The other one...*sigh* he is just a jerk. He LAUGHS when he gets to screw other players out of getting a reward, even if it would screw him out as well. He is one of those types that uses his "role-playing" as an excuse to let everyone else not have fun. He has experience doing this, he's a crafty bastard who knows just how to get under the DM's nose. And he's one of the DMs closer friends to boot so there's no getting rid of him, baring his Real Life getting in the way.

Coplantor
2010-07-27, 04:25 PM
...The other one...*sigh* he is just a jerk. He LAUGHS when he gets to screw other players out of getting a reward, even if it would screw him out as well. He is one of those types that uses his "role-playing" as an excuse to let everyone else not have fun. He has experience doing this, he's a crafty bastard who knows just how to get under the DM's nose. And he's one of the DMs closer friends to boot so there's no getting rid of him, baring his Real Life getting in the way.

Is by any chance this guy playing a paladin?

super dark33
2010-07-27, 04:31 PM
a female elf bard who had perfomence (strip) who was supposed to by my sis (in game)

Beelzebub1111
2010-07-27, 04:56 PM
Is by any chance this guy playing a paladin?
As a matter of fact, yes. Yes he is. He also is a guy that convinces the rest of the party not to do any adventure for less than twice what was offered in the module. When I ran the game, we were starting at level one. In our other game we were around level 12-ish at the time and he was expecting level 12-ish rewards. Fat greedy bastard.

Savannah
2010-07-27, 05:14 PM
As a power gamer and (mediocre) roleplayer I aprove of this post

As a completely non-power gamer, I just want to say that I have no problems playing with power gamers (I either ask for advice, read optimization handbooks, or just accept that my character is mechanically inferior and enjoy the roleplaying). I've played with someone who I would probably call a munchkin, and I do have a problem with that.

And now, back on topic...

balistafreak
2010-07-27, 05:21 PM
Nothing is worse than a munchkin who is a terrible optimizer.

Nothign is better than an optimizer who is not a munchkin.

The more you know!

Dust
2010-07-27, 05:35 PM
Contributing! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=147121&highlight=tantrum)

Kaun
2010-07-27, 05:55 PM
That is the second time i have read that story Dust and the...

"You’re not even TRYING to be gay!"


... line still makes me laugh.

Beelzebub1111
2010-07-27, 06:09 PM
Contributing! (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?t=147121&highlight=tantrum)

That story made my day.

Dubious Pie
2010-07-27, 06:55 PM
The original post has taboos from 2 sheets, he was kicked while we were looking over the second.

Hyudra
2010-07-27, 07:22 PM
Nothing truly epic, but I did have a game with a player who derailed the story almost right off the bat and baited the various players into a PC-on-PC brawl (We were asked to deliver a sealed letter to a noble, his character insisted on opening it, and defaulted to inciting an inter-group fight when he couldn't convince two of us).

He then had a hissy fit at the fact that the group was fighting when we should have been continuing with the story, and that we should have just delivered the letter. He ended up being steamed enough that he skipped the next session, informing us at the very last minute, after we'd all gotten together.

Ok, a little weird, sure, but there's a twist: He was running a DMPC. Who derailed his own game, and then got mad about it.

comicshorse
2010-07-27, 07:40 PM
Not going to mention his name.
Live Vampire game one of the players comes chortling over to me and a friend to tell us about the great joke he just pulled. We ask what and giggling he expalins how he just convinced some of the female players that another male player had been arrested recently for rape.
We excuse ourselves, go see the GM and get his ass kicked out. And then have a talk to the girls (who it turns out hadn't believed him anyway, luckily)

Kaun
2010-07-27, 08:26 PM
Live Vampire game

Live Vampire games seem to attract some douche's.

I should try and convince my mate to come and tell his story about when he was STing a vampire the masquerade LARP game, one of the female players character died and she managed to persuade the powers that be into vetoing the death.

Long story short it lead to the player unionising and setting all these masivily BS rules regarding what the ST's could and couldnt do in game.

In the end nearly all of the ST's quit the masquerade in the region and it more or less died.

blackspeeker
2010-07-27, 09:02 PM
Other than players with nerd funk (because bathing is a social construct) I've never had a real problem, unless they tried to derail the game, but that was mainly them being new.

However we've had guests come and observe and that gets terrible, they're mainly girlfriends who don't get it, one made fun of our friday night fun, another got in a fight with her boyfriend because "how long does it take to kill so-and-so, really!?", and another regularly interrupted to tell her boyfriend about whatever she'd just read or to burst out into song for 5 minutes after one of my players had said "our rod is an awesome rod"

tcrudisi
2010-07-27, 09:37 PM
Is by any chance this guy playing a paladin?

Hahahaha. Omg. +1. I was getting ready to ask the same question, but I thought, "I better see what everyone else said in case someone already asked." Brilliant.

Lhurgyof
2010-07-27, 11:16 PM
Wow... Player LC sounds horrid... so ungodly horrid.

Reminds me of our Karl. He has bad hygiene issues, but he's also an ******* and a powergamer, except he sucks at making a good character... And I mean that in the cheating kind of way...

He's so douchey. Dx

RE:Insanity
2010-07-27, 11:26 PM
I was just watching the news and found out one of the players I kicked out for being a jackass, ogling our female players, and always playing a nymphomaniac female gnome druid got arrested for molesting a girl suffering from dwarfism...

Roland St. Jude
2010-07-27, 11:51 PM
Sheriff of Moddingham: This is why we don't consolidate all the bad things in one thread. Locked for review.