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zenanarchist
2010-08-07, 09:08 AM
Child of Kharak-Stain

http://th00.deviantart.net/fs47/300W/f/2009/198/b/9/Scary_Larry_by_Sellers.jpg

Stories are often told of the children of Kharak-Stain to scare young ones into behaving properly. The “children” are mentally insane, violent, telekinetic and telepathic horrors. Their visage in combat is unsettling. Their innocent smiling features as they send their mentally-wielded bladed chains to hack apart their foe is an image straight out of a nightmare. If one ever looks close enough their eyes seem to be murderous orbs of barely contained rage, ready to snap at any moment.

They are constantly surrounded by a swirling mass of sharp bladed chains that were once used to imprison them.

Kharak-Stain

Kharak-Stain is a floating hell. It is a blight on whatever landscape its wardens force the prisoners to take it to. Its spiked towers and chained walls, smeared with the blood of its tortured inhabitants, speak a thousand words of the atrocities committed inside. Kharak-Stain imprisons refuse children, those children whose parents have either given up, ran in terror, or been slaughtered by the child itself.

The children inside are tortured with varied magics, tested painfully and filled with then emptied of psychic energy. Many, many die within the walls of Kharak-Stain and those that escape, should never, ever be released upon any world.


Child of Kharak-Stain
{table="head"]Level|BAB|Fort|Ref|Will|Special

1st|+0|+0|+1|+2|Bladed Chains

2nd|+1|+0|+1|+3|Mentality, Dreaded Knowledge

3rd|+2|+1|+2|+3|Nightmare Companion

4th|+3|+1|+2|+4|Scorn Earth

5th|+3|+1|+3|+4|Wardens Command

6th|+4|+2|+3|+5|Flickering Movement

7th|+5|+2|+3|+5|Spell Sink

8th|+6/+1|+2|+4|+6|Ghostly Presence

9th|+6/+1|+3|+4|+6|Childlike Innocence

10th|+7/+2|+3|+5|+7|Catch

11th|+8/+3|+3|+5|+7|Bladed Adept

12th|+9/+4|+4|+6|+8|Bladed Constrict

13th|+9/+4|+4|+6|+8|Frightful Presence

14th|+10/+5|+4|+6|+9|Wailing Scream

15th|+11/+6/+1|+5|+7|+9|

16th|+12/+7/+2|+5|+7|+10|Prison Break

17th|+12/+7/+2|+5|+8|+10|Rip from reality

18th|+13/+8/+3|+6|+8|+11|Bladed Immunity

19th|+14/+9/+4|+6|+8|+11|Chained Apocolypse, Summon Kin

20th|+15/+10/+5|+6|+9|+12|

[/table]
Alignment: Must be non good, usually chaotic.
Hit Die: d6

The child's class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Appraise (Int), Bluff (Cha), Decipher Script (Int), Diplomacy (Cha), Disable Device (Int), Disguise (Cha), Escape Artist (Dex), Gather Information (Cha), Hide (Dex), Intimidate (Cha), , Knowledge (Prisons) (Int), Knowledge (Dungeons) (Int), Listen (Wis), Move Silently (Dex), Open Lock (Dex), and Sense Motive (Wis).

Class Skills:

Skill Points at 1st Level: (6 + Int modifier) × 4
Skill Points at Each Additional Level: 6 + Int modifier

Weapon and Armour proficiencies:

The children of Kharak-Stain are proficient with only simple weapons and light armour.

Special:
Mummy told me not to

A child may never wield bladed weapons in their hands. Bludgeoning weapons, however, are fine.

Class Features

Bladed Chains (Ex)

{table="head"]Level|Amount|Damage|Enhancement|Properties

1|2|1d6|+1|-
4|3|1d8|+2|-
8|4|1d10|+3|Adamantine
12|5|2d6|+4|Silver
15|5|2d8|+5|Cold Iron
[/table]


The children of Kharak-Stain are bound in chains that cut deep into their skin; these chains are razor sharp and bite deep into flesh. Upon escaping most of the children, developing a sick fondness for the pain and comfort of their bonds, mentally wield these in combat. Their psychic connection with these weapons begins strong and only gets stronger.

The children always use their intelligence modifier in place of strength or dexterity when wielding the chains to determine attack bonuses and extra damage. Additionally they may use their intelligence modifier in place of strength while attempting to grapple, trip or bull rush with the chains.

The child may attack with as many chains per round as they possess and may direct one chain to attack and another to perform another action such as grapple or trip. However, the child may not move while performing another action with the blades. For example a child could move and attack with all their chains, but not move and then use their chains to grapple. A child does not attack with these chains for each attack they usually posses per round. For example, if a character has +15/+10/+5 to hit at level twenty, they do not gain 5 chain attacks at +15, 5 chain attacks at +10 and 5 chain attacks at +5, they simple gain 5 chain attacks in one round. The chains have a critical multiplier of x2 on 19-20.

A child may command the chains to meld into their skin as a full round action. This grants a +4 natural armor bonus and causes the child’s skin to writhe as if with a mind of its own. The child gains a +2 to intimidate when using the chains in this way but suffer a -4 to diplomacy.

They may choose to make their chains invisible as a swift action, however may not use them for any purpose when utilizing this action.

A child may utilize the chains to trip, grapple, bull rush or overrun at range (utilising the child's intelligence modifier instead of strength or dexterity where applicable). The chains may be wielded anywhere up to 15 foot per every level of the child (150ft maximum). Note that this does not increase the child’s reach nor may these chains act of their own accord. Upon hitting an enemy they instantly retract back to the child.

Additionally a number of special actions may be taken with the blades. They may be mentally commanded as a swift action to provide a barrier against being charged or bullrushed thus utilising their Int bonus in place of their strength or dexterity. They may be commanded to swirl around the child to provide a +2 armour bonus per chain. However, they may not be used to attack in a round where they were used in this manner. They may be commanded to form a ladder of 15 feet in length per chain that adds +8 to the childs climb modifier.

The chains have a hardness of 15 and have 40 hit points. At level 5 this becomes hardness of 20. At tenth a hardness of 25. It takes two full round actions to manifest another chain into existence if a prior one is destroyed.


Mentality (Ex)

The children of Kharak-Stain are natural telepaths and telekinetics, their time spent in Kharak-Stain amplified this to no small end. They utilize their talents to confuse, horrify and in some cases kill. At second level a child gains telepathy out to 20ft+20ft per class level. They may communicate with anyone they can see or know the exact location of.

At this level they also gain the psionic power Control Object, except they may control one object for every fourth level they possess. Each object may weigh up to 100Ibs.

Dreaded Knowledge

The child has spent years avoiding the blows of guards and wardens in the prison, they are surprisingly knowledgeable when it comes to hand to hand combat despite being very physically weak. The child always adds their intelligence modifier to their Armour Class as an untyped bonus whenever they wear light or no armour against manufactured weapons. Against natural weapons they lose this bonus.

Nightmare Companion (Ex)

From third level on a child gains a nightmare companion (Similar to the druid ability animal companion, but more restricted). The creature is more powerful as the child increases in power.

At third level this creature is a Medium Monstrous Spider

At fifth level this creature is an Pseudo Dragon

At seventh level this creature is a Displacer Beast or an Owlbear

At ninth level this creature is a Hellhound or a Manticore

At eleventh level this creature is a Digester or a Wyvern

At fifteenth level this creature is a Gray Render or an 8 headed Hydra

If the child’s Nightmare companion is ever killed or destroyed it takes a 24 hour uninterrupted ritual to re-summon it.

Scorn Earth (Su)

At 1st level, an elocater’s feet lift from the ground. From now on, she can float a foot above the ground. Instead of walking she glides along, unconcerned with the hard earth or difficult terrain. While she remains within 1 foot of a flat surface of any solid or liquid, she can take normal actions and make normal attacks, and can move at her normal speed (she can even “run” at four times her normal speed). However, at distances higher than 1 foot above any surface, her speed diminishes to 10 feet per round.

While she remains within 1 foot of a surface, she can make melee and ranged attacks normally, but if she moves any higher, she incurs the penalties on melee and ranged attack rolls as if she were the subject of the psionic levitate power.

Wardens Command (Su)

Children of Kharak-Stain have learned to imitate the powerful abilities of their wardens. Prisoners live in fear of these powerful authority figures, their powerful eyes scanning the masses and causing a child to run in fear with but a look. At fifth level the child gains a stare attack as a swift action that may be used in conjunction with their chains. This stare attack gains a number of abilities as the child grows in power. If any enemy succeeds on their saving throw they are immune to any gaze attack or visage abilities from the child for a twenty four hour period. The victim may shut their eyes to avoid the attack and all stare attacks do not work on any character who cannot see.



At fifth level the child may make a stare attack upon a single foe they can make eye contact with who must make a will save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha) or be shaken.


At tenth level the child may make a stare attack upon a single foe who must make a will save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha) or be Frightened.


At fifteenth level the child may make a stare attack upon every single enemy within 30ft who all must make a Will save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha modifier) or be held as per the spell Hold Person, as if cast by a wizard of equivalent level.


At twentieth level the child may make a stareattack upon one foe who must make a charisma based fortitude save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha modifier) or be turned to stone for four rounds.


Flickering Movement (Su)

At sixth level the child’s mental forays into the realm of nightmares and their experience with the abnormal have left their mark. The child’s body shifts in and out of reality as they move, the world struggles to retain its grasp on the character. In every round where the child moves more than 5 feet all attacks against the child have a 50% miss chance until the child’s next turn.

Spell Sink (Ex)

Kharak-Stain is a prison for powerful children. It has its defenses and over the years those defenses take a permanent toll on the child. As spells are triggered and activated near the child reality bends and warps around their person. The child gains spell resistance 10+Child class levels+Int Modifier. This affects the child in another way as well. For each level the child possesses he gains a 5% spell failure chance, this includes future levels gained.

Ghostly Presence (Su)

At eighth level the child is learning to manifest their abilities more, able to shift the composition of their own bodies with their own mental abilities. The child learns to become like a ghost and for one round equal to their class levels they may, as a standard action, become Ethereal.

Childlike Innocence (Ex)

The child has become so adept at perfecting their innocent façade that enemies struggle to strike. Even evil characters find the thought of striking something so innocent, so pure, absolutely disturbing. At ninth level every character attempting to strike the child must succeed on a Will save (DC10+1/2 child levels) or turn their weapon aside at the last moment. Once a creature succeeds on this will save they are immune to its effects for a twenty four hour period.

Catch (Ex)

The blades spin out in confusing patterned circles, grabbing at the legs of all foes in a small area, tripping them up and slowing them. The child designates an area within 50ft of their person, every foe within 30ft of this area must undertake a Reflex save (DC10+1/2 child level+Int) or be caught. When caught a targets base movement speed is halved and they suffer a 50% spell failure chance. It is a standard action to use this ability.

Bladed Adept (Ex)

The child, after years of toying with their mentally commanded chains has suffered and endured numerous cuts and abrasions and their skin has developed a hardened exterior. At eleventh level the child gains Natural Armour +3 and also gains Damage Resistance 10 to all slashing and piercing weapons.

Bladed Constrict (Ex)

The child directs their blades to enter and then burst from the ground, spitting from the earth to grab every foe that the child can see and constrict, using their blades to cut their flesh and use their blood to feed the earth. At twelfth level as a full round action the child may attempt a ranged grapple attack on a number of foes equal to the amount of blades they have multiplied by two. Any grapple checks that are successful deal 2d6 damage immediately. After this each foe gains a reflex save (DC10+1/2 child levels+Intelligence modifier) to escape the chains. For every round the foe remains in the chains they take a further 2d6 damage. No other chains abilities or attacks may be used during this ability.

Frightful Presence (Su)

The child is a sight to behold in combat. The vision of a tiny innocent child tearing their comrades to shreds is enough to unsettle any individual. The child gains the ability Frightful Presence whenever she attacks, charges, moves more than 30ft, leaps at an enemy, attacks with all her chains within 10ft of her person or performs any similar dramatic actions. An affected opponent can resist the effects with a successful Will save (DC 10 + ½ Child Class level + Cha modifier). Any opponent who makes the saving throw is immune to the effects for a 24 hour period.

Wailing Scream (Ex)

The child lets out an ear piercing scream that harms all within range of its high pitched tones. This is a standard action. This deals 6d8 sonic damage to all in a 30ft radius. At fifteenth level the child may, once per day, designate two characters who take damage from this attack and force them to make a fortitude save (DC10+1/2 Child levels+Cha Modifier) or die. Any who witness a death occuring in this way must succeed on a Will Save (DC10+1/2 child levels+Cha) or be shaken.

Prison Break (Su)

Prison mates from Kharak-Stain flood from it's gates to aid the child in a time of need. Upon activating this ability four children appear. Three of which possess blades at a level equal to the child's current blade power but none of their abilities. One of which is identical to the child activating the ability in every way, even hit points and charges used from abilities but without any armour or items. This ability lasts for 4 rounds and is a standard action to activate.

Rip from Reality (Su)

The child's powers are becoming more nightmare like, they are now able to tear an individual directly from reality and stuff them into a horrible nightmare landscape. This dreadful place sickens and weakens any individual spending more than a second or two inside.

Any time a child successfully grapples a foe with at least three chains, they may force the victim to undergo a Will save (DC15+1/2 child class levels+Cha modifier) which, if failed tears the victim from reality and forces them into a nightmare world of the child's own sick mental creation. This world deals one point of constitution damage every round the foe is stuck inside. This damage lasts for one hour after exiting the world. This ability lasts for five rounds plus the child's intelligence modifier. The child may rip any number of foes from the battle field equal to 3/4 their class level, rounded up per encounter.

Bladed Immunity (Ex)

After years of being surrounded by swirling bladed chains and years spent accepting harsh blows at the hands of the wardens. The child is now completely immune to any weapon that deals slashing damage, the wounds immediately close over upon attack. However, magical damage or elemental damage still takes place.

Chained Apocalypse(Su)

The child stands amidst what seems to be Armageddon. Sharp bladed shrapnel flits through the area, cutting apart foes and shredding skin. Metal rains down from the sky in huge chunks and bladed chains rip through the area, tearing apart the enemies of the child.

A number of effects occur upon activating this ability as a standard action. First the child designates an area. In a 50ft radius surrounding this area every hostile foe makes a Reflex save (DC10+1/2 class levels+Int modifier) or take 12d12 damage. If the reflex save is made the enemies still take 6d6 damage.

Any foes who do not take the maximum damage from this ability must make a second reflex save DC19 or be held completely immobile for 1d3 rounds.

Summon Kin (Su)

The child, understanding the need for like minded allies, brings aid to bear in the form of murderous chained demons. As a full round action the child may summon up to three 16HD chained devils into existence. These devils last until killed or mentally dismissed by the child. The child does not require a check to control the demons and they will go to any means to protect the child.

AUTHOR: Class almost finished. I'm trying to think of horror related abilities. Any suggestions welcome. Think creepy. Think sadistic.

zenanarchist
2010-08-07, 09:28 PM
Finished except for the capstone. Double posting to try and get reviewer comments on what the cap stone ability should be. Vitally importantant that the ability is horror/murder/chain themed.

Go wild.

Admiral Squish
2010-08-07, 09:37 PM
Honestly, I would actually make this as TWO homebrews. One is the child horror template, and the other is this class. I really don't like that if you multiclass into this, you gain a template and are suddenly a kid.

As to the template, I don't like that you're small, no matter what your original size. What about hill giant children, or halfling kids? I would just make the size decrease by one.

I haven't read the rest, really, but I'll have to give it a look.

zenanarchist
2010-08-07, 10:11 PM
Honestly, I would actually make this as TWO homebrews. One is the child horror template, and the other is this class. I really don't like that if you multiclass into this, you gain a template and are suddenly a kid.

As to the template, I don't like that you're small, no matter what your original size. What about hill giant children, or halfling kids? I would just make the size decrease by one.

I haven't read the rest, really, but I'll have to give it a look.

Compromise, multiclassing decreases the size category of the character by one. However if you take this class as a first level you are small sized. Still too blah?

Edit: Or did you mean that you're really, really unfond of the idea that this class forces a template on the character?

Admiral Squish
2010-08-07, 10:27 PM
A 5th level human character suddenly, through mental trauma, uncovers his repressed memories of Kharak-Stain and the cruel tortures inflicted upon him. The memories unlock the powers he gained through the process, and he takes his first level. The question is, why does he suddenly shrink? Is he suddenly more charsmatic? Does he suddenly lose muscle tone?

So, yes, I really don't like the class forcing a template on a character. I think the two should be separated. The child horrors would be, by far, the most likely to have this class, but that way it still allows for options like the above. Plus, maybe child horror could be used for other things. I know plenty of horrifying children that could use this template.

zenanarchist
2010-08-07, 10:34 PM
A 5th level human character suddenly, through mental trauma, uncovers his repressed memories of Kharak-Stain and the cruel tortures inflicted upon him. The memories unlock the powers he gained through the process, and he takes his first level. The question is, why does he suddenly shrink? Is he suddenly more charsmatic? Does he suddenly lose muscle tone?

So, yes, I really don't like the class forcing a template on a character. I think the two should be separated. The child horrors would be, by far, the most likely to have this class, but that way it still allows for options like the above. Plus, maybe child horror could be used for other things. I know plenty of horrifying children that could use this template.

Very sound reasoning. I concede and concur. I'll make the appropriate changes tonight. Thanks for the outlook. When you get the chance let me know what you think of the rest. :smallsmile:

Admiral Squish
2010-08-07, 11:35 PM
Alright, let's go down the list.

Bladed chains:
I think you should probably but the statistics for the chains in the very beginning, and include a FULL list of what can and cannot be done with the chains. You mentioned grapples, but normally a character grapples, he doesn't use weapons to do so. Maybe the chains have a constrict ability?
A lot of the chain abilities upgrade every five levels. I'd say 'every five levels' rather than making a little list for every upgrade. Perhaps even combine all the scaling chain abilities into a little table?
I'd drastically reduce the range of the chains. At 10th level, they can fight perfectly with an opponent from about a block away. Have one chain grapple and the others go to town. By the time anyone gets to you, they'd be dead, or blocked by the chains. Also, five full attacks in a round at 15th level is rather ridiculous. That's... 15 attacks, at no penalty.

Mentality:
Telepathy is, while not incredibly strong, should still have a limited range. 20+20/level is rather excessive. I'd also make the telekinesis scale much slower, and use a spell already in existence as a basis. It would help with balance, and it would help a lot with what can and cannot be done with said telekinesis. I recommend looking at psionic powers, they have alot of telekinetic powers that would help with this.
My initial assessment is that you get this too early, the power scales too fast, and the mechanics are slightly... awkward.

Dreaded knowledge:
This class is certainly SAD, isn't it? I'd call it a dodge bonus, and limit the what it applies against. Is years of avoiding guards really that helpful against, say, a wolf's bite, or an archer?

Nightmare Companion:
I think you should make this list much, much broader. like, five-ten creatures of comparable CR to choose from. It allows for more interesting variation without breaking the limits. Plus, it's a little jarring that your companion changes, seemingly at random, from creature to creature. What if I REALLY want to keep a pseudodragon? I'd also include rules for scaling power.

Scorn earth:
I;d just take this, almost verbatim, from the elocator ability of the same name (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/psionic/prestigeClasses/elocater.htm#scornEarth).

Warden's command:
It's really starting to look like 5th, 10th, 15th and 20th are going to be really overloaded. I'd say that you shouldn't call it 'gaze' because that has it's own special rules. Also, usually the formula for saves is usually (10+1/2 level+Modifier) The 5th and 10th abilities work WAY too well with the horrific visage thingie. At 15th, if it applies only to humanoids, then it'll be way too powerful VS human groups or utterly useless against all others. if it doesn't affect only humanoids, then it's too powerful all the time. Holding everyone, with a single action, for 15+rounds, is very, very powerful.
----------------
I'm going to bed now, so I don't really have time for everything, but I'll be back to continue come morning.

zenanarchist
2010-08-08, 12:30 AM
Alright, let's go down the list.

Bladed chains:
I think you should probably but the statistics for the chains in the very beginning, and include a FULL list of what can and cannot be done with the chains. You mentioned grapples, but normally a character grapples, he doesn't use weapons to do so. Maybe the chains have a constrict ability?
A lot of the chain abilities upgrade every five levels. I'd say 'every five levels' rather than making a little list for every upgrade. Perhaps even combine all the scaling chain abilities into a little table?
I'd drastically reduce the range of the chains. At 10th level, they can fight perfectly with an opponent from about a block away. Have one chain grapple and the others go to town. By the time anyone gets to you, they'd be dead, or blocked by the chains. Also, five full attacks in a round at 15th level is rather ridiculous. That's... 15 attacks, at no penalty.

I should of stated that the chains are useable in place of their regular attacks per round....Not with. As in you don't get your 15/10/5 attack. You get 5 attacks with the chains, the end. I wonder how I can word that to imply such.....


Mentality:
Telepathy is, while not incredibly strong, should still have a limited range. 20+20/level is rather excessive. I'd also make the telekinesis scale much slower, and use a spell already in existence as a basis. It would help with balance, and it would help a lot with what can and cannot be done with said telekinesis. I recommend looking at psionic powers, they have alot of telekinetic powers that would help with this.
My initial assessment is that you get this too early, the power scales too fast, and the mechanics are slightly... awkward.

Would 10 then +5/level be more adequate for telepathy? I will attempt to research telekinesis tonight and scale it as such. What level do you recommend for telekinesis? Four? Six?


Dreaded knowledge:
This class is certainly SAD, isn't it? I'd call it a dodge bonus, and limit the what it applies against. Is years of avoiding guards really that helpful against, say, a wolf's bite, or an archer?

Why yes, yes it is. lol. Avoiding guards blows... I could say that the child only gains this bonus against manufactured weapons, however against natural weapons the bonus does not apply....Howzat?


Nightmare Companion:
I think you should make this list much, much broader. like, five-ten creatures of comparable CR to choose from. It allows for more interesting variation without breaking the limits. Plus, it's a little jarring that your companion changes, seemingly at random, from creature to creature. What if I REALLY want to keep a pseudodragon? I'd also include rules for scaling power.

I should include in there a statement that the character can keep their companion as they level up and choose to advance the HD....Any advice as to how? Similarly....Is there a list somewhere of nightmare/monstrous creatures by CR? I don't own any books...


Scorn earth:
I;d just take this, almost verbatim, from the elocator ability of the same name (http://www.d20srd.org/srd/psionic/prestigeClasses/elocater.htm#scornEarth).

I shall


Warden's command:
It's really starting to look like 5th, 10th, 15th and 20th are going to be really overloaded. I'd say that you shouldn't call it 'gaze' because that has it's own special rules. Also, usually the formula for saves is usually (10+1/2 level+Modifier) The 5th and 10th abilities work WAY too well with the horrific visage thingie. At 15th, if it applies only to humanoids, then it'll be way too powerful VS human groups or utterly useless against all others. if it doesn't affect only humanoids, then it's too powerful all the time. Holding everyone, with a single action, for 15+rounds, is very, very powerful.

I do agree. I think I'll shift the abilities around so they are granted at 3,6,9,12 and 4,8,12,16 and 5,10,15,20. Just to space it out a little. Hmmm I'll need to scale down the rounds.... But agreed. Thanks for all the really helpful advice.
----------------
I'm going to bed now, so I don't really have time for everything, but I'll be back to continue come morning.[/QUOTE]

InfiniteNothing
2010-08-09, 02:26 PM
Overall this class is... :smalleek: impressive... not to mention it brings multiple horror movies to mind, but that's beside the point.

For Bladed Constrict... I think the save DC's a little low. Also, is it possible to target someone more than once with that ability? Maybe increasing the DC along with the damage? And should the damage increase at 15th level, to keep up with the chains' base damage?

Is Rip From Reality's foe limit the limitation on how many can be pulled into the nightmare world per day? Per encounter? Or is that the nightmare world's carrying capacity?

Summon Kin... How many Hit Dice do the devils have? No offense, but bare-minimum HD makes them little more than cannon fodder, if I'm not mistaken.

zenanarchist
2010-08-09, 05:17 PM
Overall this class is... :smalleek: impressive... not to mention it brings multiple horror movies to mind, but that's beside the point.

For Bladed Constrict... I think the save DC's a little low. Also, is it possible to target someone more than once with that ability? Maybe increasing the DC along with the damage? And should the damage increase at 15th level, to keep up with the chains' base damage?

Is Rip From Reality's foe limit the limitation on how many can be pulled into the nightmare world per day? Per encounter? Or is that the nightmare world's carrying capacity?

Summon Kin... How many Hit Dice do the devils have? No offense, but bare-minimum HD makes them little more than cannon fodder, if I'm not mistaken.

I think that needs a thank you. lol. Impressive overpowered or impressive scary? Horror movies was the point, I hope I conveyed it well enough that this children are bat sh** crazy. lol.

Bladed Constrict DC now scales, rip from reality was further explained. Hmmm yeah cannon fodder was sort of the point...but if that's a little weak....maybe 13HD? 12? What's balanced?

InfiniteNothing
2010-08-09, 05:48 PM
Impressive scary. Definately impressive scary.

I'm not the best judge of balance for something like Summon Kin, but I'm thinking 14 to 15 HD. And just so you know, the kyton's max racial HD is 16.

zenanarchist
2010-08-09, 05:52 PM
Impressive scary. Definately impressive scary.

I'm not the best judge of balance for something like Summon Kin, but I'm thinking 14 to 15 HD. And just so you know, the kyton's max racial HD is 16.

*chuckles* I'm glad impressive scaring. I intend on using the child a little comedically in my next campaign (He's a changeling who randomly kills people wearing different faces/slightly different size (probably a halfling or dwarf) and then changes back and acts innocent.

But for a horror campaign....he would be brilliant, and really shine. Especially with the Child Horror Template. And the Bone Sword. *shudder*

Hmmm let's run it at 16HD then.

Temotei
2010-08-10, 02:32 AM
Hit Die: d6

The child's class skills (and the key ability for each skill) are Appraise (Int), Bluff (Cha), Decipher Script (Int), Diplomacy (Cha), Disable Device (Int), Disguise (Cha), Escape Artist (Dex), Gather Information (Cha), Hide (Dex), Intimidate (Cha), , Knowledge (Prisons) (Int), Knowledge (Dungeons) (Int), Listen (Wis), Move Silently (Dex), Open Lock (Dex), and Sense Motive (Wis).

Skill Points at 1st Level: (6 + Int modifier) × 4
Skill Points at Each Additional Level: 6 + Int modifier

Weapon and Armour proficiencies:

The children of Kharak-Stain are proficient with only simple weapons and light armour.

A rogue-type chassis, eh? Okay, then. Knowledge (prisons) and Knowledge (dungeons) do not exist, though Knowledge (dungeoneering) does. If you really want them to have those skills, grant bonuses to Knowledge when the checks are made in relation to prisons.


Special:
Mummy told me not to

A child may never wield bladed weapons in their hands. Bludgeoning weapons, however, are fine.

So, no slashing weapon choices and slightly limited piercing weapon selection? Okay, I guess.


Bladed Chains (Ex)

{table="head"]Level|Amount|Damage|Enhancement|Properties

1|2|1d6|+1|-
4|3|1d8|+2|-
8|4|1d10|+3|Adamantine
12|5|2d6|+4|Silver
15|5|2d8|+5|Cold Iron
[/table]


The children of Kharak-Stain are bound in chains that cut deep into their skin; these chains are razor sharp and bite deep into flesh. Upon escaping most of the children, developing a sick fondness for the pain and comfort of their bonds, mentally wield these in combat. Their psychic connection with these weapons begins strong and only gets stronger.

The children always use their intelligence modifier in place of strength or dexterity when wielding the chains to determine attack bonuses and extra damage. Additionally they may use their intelligence modifier in place of strength while attempting to grapple, trip or bull rush with the chains.

The child may attack with as many chains per round as they possess and may direct one chain to attack and another to perform another action such as grapple or trip. However, the child may not move while performing another action with the blades. For example a child could move and attack with all their chains, but not move and then use their chains to grapple. A child does not attack with these chains for each attack they usually posses per round. For example, if a character has +15/+10/+5 to hit at level twenty, they do not gain 5 chain attacks at +15, 5 chain attacks at +10 and 5 chain attacks at +5, they simple gain 5 chain attacks in one round. The chains have a critical multiplier of x2 on 19-20.

A child may command the chains to meld into their skin as a full round action. This grants a +4 natural armor bonus and causes the child’s skin to writhe as if with a mind of its own. The child gains a +2 to intimidate when using the chains in this way but suffer a -4 to diplomacy.

They may choose to make their chains invisible as a swift action, however may not use them for any purpose when utilizing this action.

A child may utilize the chains to trip, grapple, bull rush or overrun at range (utilising the child's intelligence modifier instead of strength or dexterity where applicable). The chains may be wielded anywhere up to 15 foot per every level of the child (150ft maximum). Note that this does not increase the child’s reach nor may these chains act of their own accord. Upon hitting an enemy they instantly retract back to the child.

Additionally a number of special actions may be taken with the blades. They may be mentally commanded as a swift action to provide a barrier against being charged or bullrushed thus utilising their Int bonus in place of their strength or dexterity. They may be commanded to swirl around the child to provide a +2 armour bonus per chain. However, they may not be used to attack in a round where they were used in this manner. They may be commanded to form a ladder of 15 feet in length per chain that adds +8 to the childs climb modifier.

The chains have a hardness of 15 and have 40 hit points. At level 5 this becomes hardness of 20. At tenth a hardness of 25. It takes two full round actions to manifest another chain into existence if a prior one is destroyed.

This, as a 1st-level ability, is a pretty dang good dip. You essentially gain two free attacks per round with +1 weapons, if I read this correctly. In addition, you can bull rush (?), grapple (??), and trip with the chains. Oh, and you gain an armor ability. And a ladder-like ability. And an anti-combat option ability. Not only that, but they go 15 feet per class level up to 150 feet. That's a lot of stuff for 1st level.


Mentality (Ex)

The children of Kharak-Stain are natural telepaths and telekinetics, their time spent in Kharak-Stain amplified this to no small end. They utilize their talents to confuse, horrify and in some cases kill. At second level a child gains telepathy out to 20ft+20ft per class level. They may communicate with anyone they can see or know the exact location of.

At this level they also gain the psionic power Control Object, except they may control one object for every fourth level they possess. Each object may weigh up to 100Ibs.

So, at 2nd level, they gain 40-foot telepathy, which eventually extends to 420 feet at 20th, and control object at will, which improves to five objects controlled at 20th. Control object isn't the best power ever, but getting two chains (1d6+Int mod+1), one object (1d6+Int mod), and one attack per round at 2nd level isn't exactly balanced in my eyes. That's not using the chains for tripping or grappling, which would be the smart thing to do.


Dreaded Knowledge

The child has spent years avoiding the blows of guards and wardens in the prison, they are surprisingly knowledgeable when it comes to hand to hand combat despite being very physically weak. The child always adds their intelligence modifier to their Armour Class as an untyped bonus whenever they wear light or no armour against manufactured weapons. Against natural weapons they lose this bonus.

What about against unarmed strikes?


Nightmare Companion (Ex)

From third level on a child gains a nightmare companion (Similar to the druid ability animal companion, but more restricted). The creature is more powerful as the child increases in power.

At third level this creature is a Medium Monstrous Spider

At fifth level this creature is an Pseudo Dragon

At seventh level this creature is a Displacer Beast or an Owlbear

At ninth level this creature is a Hellhound or a Manticore

At eleventh level this creature is a Digester or a Wyvern

At fifteenth level this creature is a Gray Render or an 8 headed Hydra

If the child’s Nightmare companion is ever killed or destroyed it takes a 24 hour uninterrupted ritual to re-summon it.

If the child wants to keep an old companion, can they advance their HD like with an animal companion? Does the creature's Intelligence increase with HD?

Why wouldn't you pick a manticore at 9th level?

Is the eight-headed hydra a pyro or cryohydra?


Scorn Earth (Su)

At 1st level, an elocater’s feet lift from the ground. From now on, she can float a foot above the ground. Instead of walking she glides along, unconcerned with the hard earth or difficult terrain. While she remains within 1 foot of a flat surface of any solid or liquid, she can take normal actions and make normal attacks, and can move at her normal speed (she can even “run” at four times her normal speed). However, at distances higher than 1 foot above any surface, her speed diminishes to 10 feet per round.

While she remains within 1 foot of a surface, she can make melee and ranged attacks normally, but if she moves any higher, she incurs the penalties on melee and ranged attack rolls as if she were the subject of the psionic levitate power.

Copy-paste error.


Wardens Command (Su)

At fifth level the child gains a stare attack as a swift action that may be used in conjunction with their chains. This stare attack gains a number of abilities as the child grows in power. If any enemy succeeds on their saving throw they are immune to any gaze attack or visage abilities from the child for a twenty four hour period. The victim may shut their eyes to avoid the attack and all stare attacks do not work on any character who cannot see.

There's no such thing as a stare attack. Change all instances of stare to gaze.




At fifth level the child may make a stare attack upon a single foe they can make eye contact with who must make a will save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha) or be shaken.

Shaken isn't that powerful at this point, but it's at will, so it's worth something.



At tenth level the child may make a stare attack upon a single foe who must make a will save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha) or be Frightened.

Alright, then. I suppose that's to be expected. I just noticed the save DCs for this and the above ability are off, though. It's 10 + 1/2 class levels + Cha modifier. Make sure to put modifier after Cha every time. Otherwise, you get some pretty ridiculous saving throw DCs.



At fifteenth level the child may make a stare attack upon every single enemy within 30ft who all must make a Will save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha modifier) or be held as per the spell Hold Person, as if cast by a wizard of equivalent level.

Mass hold person at will? I think not.



At twentieth level the child may make a stareattack upon one foe who must make a charisma based fortitude save (DC10+1/2 child level+Cha modifier) or be turned to stone for four rounds.

This, combined with the above ability, is basically a win button. Tone down the gaze attack by forcing a limit of rounds per day it can be used, or reduce its power by a significant amount.


Flickering Movement (Su)

At sixth level the child’s mental forays into the realm of nightmares and their experience with the abnormal have left their mark. The child’s body shifts in and out of reality as they move, the world struggles to retain its grasp on the character. In every round where the child moves more than 5 feet all attacks against the child have a 50% miss chance until the child’s next turn.

At best, make it 20% at 6th level, with the minimum movement required being 10 feet. Maybe improve it later.


Spell Sink (Ex)

Kharak-Stain is a prison for powerful children. It has its defenses and over the years those defenses take a permanent toll on the child. As spells are triggered and activated near the child reality bends and warps around their person. The child gains spell resistance 10+Child class levels+Int Modifier. This affects the child in another way as well. For each level the child possesses he gains a 5% spell failure chance, this includes future levels gained.

You incur spell failure when you don't even get spellcasting? That's not really a penalty so much as a multiclassing restriction.

The spell resistance is pretty high, though. Why not go with the standard 11+HD/class levels?


Ghostly Presence (Su)

At eighth level the child is learning to manifest their abilities more, able to shift the composition of their own bodies with their own mental abilities. The child learns to become like a ghost and for one round equal to their class levels they may, as a standard action, become Ethereal.

"One round equal to their class levels" means nothing. Change it to "one round per class level."

This seems okay, though you'll want to say that it's that amount of time per day.


Childlike Innocence (Ex)

The child has become so adept at perfecting their innocent façade that enemies struggle to strike. Even evil characters find the thought of striking something so innocent, so pure, absolutely disturbing. At ninth level every character attempting to strike the child must succeed on a Will save (DC10+1/2 child levels) or turn their weapon aside at the last moment. Once a creature succeeds on this will save they are immune to its effects for a twenty four hour period.

Turning their weapon aside means an automatic miss, correct? If so, it seems okay, though the saving throw DC is pretty low. Still, it'll probably prevent some attacks, and it's a nice alternative to a simple miss chance.


Catch (Ex)

The blades spin out in confusing patterned circles, grabbing at the legs of all foes in a small area, tripping them up and slowing them. The child designates an area within 50ft of their person, every foe within 30ft of this area must undertake a Reflex save (DC10+1/2 child level+Int) or be caught. When caught a targets base movement speed is halved and they suffer a 50% spell failure chance. It is a standard action to use this ability.

Make sure you put "modifier" after Int.

How long does being caught last?


Bladed Adept (Ex)

The child, after years of toying with their mentally commanded chains has suffered and endured numerous cuts and abrasions and their skin has developed a hardened exterior. At eleventh level the child gains Natural Armour +3 and also gains Damage Resistance 10 to all slashing and piercing weapons.

Damage reduction is what you're looking for. Say something like this after the fluff: "At 11th level, the child gains a +3 natural armor bonus to AC and damage reduction 10/bludgeoning."

Note that this bonus to AC doesn't stack with the chains' ability to provide AC, and this ability is fairly "meh" at 11th level. It's kind of boring, and kind of weak.


Bladed Constrict (Ex)

The child directs their blades to enter and then burst from the ground, spitting from the earth to grab every foe that the child can see and constrict, using their blades to cut their flesh and use their blood to feed the earth. At twelfth level as a full round action the child may attempt a ranged grapple attack on a number of foes equal to the amount of blades they have multiplied by two. Any grapple checks that are successful deal 2d6 damage immediately. After this each foe gains a reflex save (DC10+1/2 child levels+Intelligence modifier) to escape the chains. For every round the foe remains in the chains they take a further 2d6 damage. No other chains abilities or attacks may be used during this ability.

Are the opponents constricted actually grappled, or are you using the term loosely? If it's the latter, I recommend changing that. If it's the former, I recommend changing it to the latter. :smallamused:


Frightful Presence (Su)

The child is a sight to behold in combat. The vision of a tiny innocent child tearing their comrades to shreds is enough to unsettle any individual. The child gains the ability Frightful Presence whenever she attacks, charges, moves more than 30ft, leaps at an enemy, attacks with all her chains within 10ft of her person or performs any similar dramatic actions. An affected opponent can resist the effects with a successful Will save (DC 10 + ½ Child Class level + Cha modifier). Any opponent who makes the saving throw is immune to the effects for a 24 hour period.

What's the presence's range? Are the targets frightened or shaken? What's the duration?


Wailing Scream (Ex)

The child lets out an ear piercing scream that harms all within range of its high pitched tones. This is a standard action. This deals 6d8 sonic damage to all in a 30ft radius. At fifteenth level the child may, once per day, designate two characters who take damage from this attack and force them to make a fortitude save (DC10+1/2 Child levels+Cha Modifier) or die. Any who witness a death occuring in this way must succeed on a Will Save (DC10+1/2 child levels+Cha) or be shaken.

Does the child have to choose two enemies at the same time, or can they pick one enemy in an encounter, then later choose another enemy when they use wailing scream again?


Prison Break (Su)

Prison mates from Kharak-Stain flood from it's gates to aid the child in a time of need. Upon activating this ability four children appear. Three of which possess blades at a level equal to the child's current blade power but none of their abilities. One of which is identical to the child activating the ability in every way, even hit points and charges used from abilities but without any armour or items. This ability lasts for 4 rounds and is a standard action to activate.

Well, considering you can use this at will, I'd say it's broken. Fix it.


Rip from Reality (Su)

Any time a child successfully grapples a foe with at least three chains, they may force the victim to undergo a Will save (DC15+1/2 child class levels+Cha modifier) which, if failed tears the victim from reality and forces them into a nightmare world of the child's own sick mental creation. This world deals one point of constitution damage every round the foe is stuck inside. This damage lasts for one hour after exiting the world. This ability lasts for five rounds plus the child's intelligence modifier. The child may rip any number of foes from the battle field equal to 3/4 their class level, rounded up per encounter.

This is really powerful, from what I can see. Does each chain have to succeed in joining the grapple, or do the second and third chain automatically grapple? Once an enemy is sent to that dimension, does the child gain their chains back?


Bladed Immunity (Ex)

After years of being surrounded by swirling bladed chains and years spent accepting harsh blows at the hands of the wardens. The child is now completely immune to any weapon that deals slashing damage, the wounds immediately close over upon attack. However, magical damage or elemental damage still takes place.

Eh. At first glance, this might seem powerful, but most damage comes from magic, anyway. The weapon itself is only dealing, like, 4d10 damage (22 average), max. That's assuming it's slashing and it's one of those weird mercurial (?) blades.


Chained Apocalypse(Su)

A number of effects occur upon activating this ability as a standard action. First the child designates an area. In a 50ft radius surrounding this area every hostile foe makes a Reflex save (DC10+1/2 class levels+Int modifier) or take 12d12 damage. If the reflex save is made the enemies still take 6d6 damage.

Any foes who do not take the maximum damage from this ability must make a second reflex save DC19 or be held completely immobile for 1d3 rounds.

What does being held immobile entail? Can the creatures still attack? Cast spells? Ingest potions? Use magic items?

Also, put a limit on the range. The child could designate an area anywhere, as this is written.

Also, why do creatures that make the save have to make another one or be held immobile? It should probably be the other way around. Why a set DC, too?


Summon Kin (Su)

The child, understanding the need for like minded allies, brings aid to bear in the form of murderous chained demons. As a full round action the child may summon up to three 16HD chained devils into existence. These devils last until killed or mentally dismissed by the child. The child does not require a check to control the demons and they will go to any means to protect the child.

Broken, once more, because of no limits on uses per day.

Most features need clarification, and many features need to be toned down or simply changed. Overall, the class needs a lot of refinement before it's ready to be used.

zenanarchist
2010-08-10, 05:31 PM
A rogue-type chassis, eh? Okay, then. Knowledge (prisons) and Knowledge (dungeons) do not exist, though Knowledge (dungeoneering) does. If you really want them to have those skills, grant bonuses to Knowledge when the checks are made in relation to prisons.



So, no slashing weapon choices and slightly limited piercing weapon selection? Okay, I guess.



This, as a 1st-level ability, is a pretty dang good dip. You essentially gain two free attacks per round with +1 weapons, if I read this correctly. In addition, you can bull rush (?), grapple (??), and trip with the chains. Oh, and you gain an armor ability. And a ladder-like ability. And an anti-combat option ability. Not only that, but they go 15 feet per class level up to 150 feet. That's a lot of stuff for 1st level.



So, at 2nd level, they gain 40-foot telepathy, which eventually extends to 420 feet at 20th, and control object at will, which improves to five objects controlled at 20th. Control object isn't the best power ever, but getting two chains (1d6+Int mod+1), one object (1d6+Int mod), and one attack per round at 2nd level isn't exactly balanced in my eyes. That's not using the chains for tripping or grappling, which would be the smart thing to do.



What about against unarmed strikes?



If the child wants to keep an old companion, can they advance their HD like with an animal companion? Does the creature's Intelligence increase with HD?

Why wouldn't you pick a manticore at 9th level?

Is the eight-headed hydra a pyro or cryohydra?



Copy-paste error.



There's no such thing as a stare attack. Change all instances of stare to gaze.



Shaken isn't that powerful at this point, but it's at will, so it's worth something.



Alright, then. I suppose that's to be expected. I just noticed the save DCs for this and the above ability are off, though. It's 10 + 1/2 class levels + Cha modifier. Make sure to put modifier after Cha every time. Otherwise, you get some pretty ridiculous saving throw DCs.



Mass hold person at will? I think not.



This, combined with the above ability, is basically a win button. Tone down the gaze attack by forcing a limit of rounds per day it can be used, or reduce its power by a significant amount.



At best, make it 20% at 6th level, with the minimum movement required being 10 feet. Maybe improve it later.



You incur spell failure when you don't even get spellcasting? That's not really a penalty so much as a multiclassing restriction.

The spell resistance is pretty high, though. Why not go with the standard 11+HD/class levels?



"One round equal to their class levels" means nothing. Change it to "one round per class level."

This seems okay, though you'll want to say that it's that amount of time per day.



Turning their weapon aside means an automatic miss, correct? If so, it seems okay, though the saving throw DC is pretty low. Still, it'll probably prevent some attacks, and it's a nice alternative to a simple miss chance.



Make sure you put "modifier" after Int.

How long does being caught last?



Damage reduction is what you're looking for. Say something like this after the fluff: "At 11th level, the child gains a +3 natural armor bonus to AC and damage reduction 10/bludgeoning."

Note that this bonus to AC doesn't stack with the chains' ability to provide AC, and this ability is fairly "meh" at 11th level. It's kind of boring, and kind of weak.



Are the opponents constricted actually grappled, or are you using the term loosely? If it's the latter, I recommend changing that. If it's the former, I recommend changing it to the latter. :smallamused:



What's the presence's range? Are the targets frightened or shaken? What's the duration?



Does the child have to choose two enemies at the same time, or can they pick one enemy in an encounter, then later choose another enemy when they use wailing scream again?



Well, considering you can use this at will, I'd say it's broken. Fix it.



This is really powerful, from what I can see. Does each chain have to succeed in joining the grapple, or do the second and third chain automatically grapple? Once an enemy is sent to that dimension, does the child gain their chains back?



Eh. At first glance, this might seem powerful, but most damage comes from magic, anyway. The weapon itself is only dealing, like, 4d10 damage (22 average), max. That's assuming it's slashing and it's one of those weird mercurial (?) blades.



What does being held immobile entail? Can the creatures still attack? Cast spells? Ingest potions? Use magic items?

Also, put a limit on the range. The child could designate an area anywhere, as this is written.

Also, why do creatures that make the save have to make another one or be held immobile? It should probably be the other way around. Why a set DC, too?



Broken, once more, because of no limits on uses per day.

Most features need clarification, and many features need to be toned down or simply changed. Overall, the class needs a lot of refinement before it's ready to be used.

Ouch. But fair. Will work on it!

DaragosKitsune
2010-08-10, 06:00 PM
There is a bit of a problem with trying to take this class. Taking the first level forces you to take the Child Horror template, which is +1 LA. So one level of this class increases your ECL by 2. This needs to be addressed in some way.

zenanarchist
2010-08-10, 06:03 PM
There is a bit of a problem with trying to take this class. Taking the first level forces you to take the Child Horror template, which is +1 LA. So one level of this class increases your ECL by 2. This needs to be addressed in some way.

Addressed :smallwink:

Temotei
2010-08-10, 06:32 PM
A child of Kharak-Stain has the option of taking the Child Horror template at +0 LA instead of the regulat +1 LA.

That's not really a solution. That would be like me giving the shadowcaster the dark template for free just because it fits the fluff.

Just allow the class to take the template like any other character.

zenanarchist
2010-08-10, 06:38 PM
That's not really a solution. That would be like me giving the shadowcaster the dark template for free just because it fits the fluff.

Just allow the class to take the template like any other character.

Holy crap Tem. You're friggin everywhere. lmao you little board teleporter you. Your like Big brother for Gitp.

DaragosKitsune
2010-08-10, 09:52 PM
Nightmare Companion (Ex)

From third level on a child gains a nightmare companion (Similar to the druid ability animal companion, but more restricted). The creature is more powerful as the child increases in power.

At third level this creature is a Medium Monstrous Spider

At fifth level this creature is an Pseudo Dragon

At seventh level this creature is a Displacer Beast or an Owlbear

At ninth level this creature is a Hellhound or a Manticore

At eleventh level this creature is a Digester or a Wyvern

At fifteenth level this creature is a Gray Render or an 8 headed Hydra

If the child’s Nightmare companion is ever killed or destroyed it takes a 24 hour uninterrupted ritual to re-summon it.


Does this mean it gets animal companion bonuses as a druid or ranger's companion would? You aren't clear. Also, why is the companion required to change? Some of the creatures have good abilities that the Child in question might want to keep, so why can't a nightmare companion just become a more powerful version of what it already was?

zenanarchist
2010-08-11, 05:49 AM
Does this mean it gets animal companion bonuses as a druid or ranger's companion would? You aren't clear. Also, why is the companion required to change? Some of the creatures have good abilities that the Child in question might want to keep, so why can't a nightmare companion just become a more powerful version of what it already was?

I've had that a bit actually.... I'll have to reword it so that you can advance the HD if you choose to.

Kurtmuran
2010-08-25, 10:44 AM
im doing a character whit this class and the child horror template what feats recomend to this class?

zenanarchist
2010-08-26, 02:43 AM
im doing a character whit this class and the child horror template what feats recomend to this class?

Personally I'd take things that get you more attacks...and greater animal companions...

Please beware this class will be having more added to it so save the template if you like it how it is!