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View Full Version : Touhou Mafia: A potential literary series. Only on GiTP.



InyutheBeatIs
2010-09-21, 11:12 PM
Well, simply put, I was inspired by a picture of a sort of "what if?" scenario, where some of the Touhou characters are actually a part of the mafia. So, today, I decided to write with this in mind. So here it is. :smallbiggrin:

Transfer in the Rain:Rainy days.

I hate rainy days. It’s always a sign that something is going to be wrong, and that you should just get back in bed, pull the covers back over you and go back to sleep.

Unfortunately, I don’t exactly have the luxury of doing so. The Hakurei Shrine submitted an order, and they wanted it today. So, I got up off the floor, put on my black coat over my clothes, grabbed an umbrella and the “merchandise”, and walked outside. I put the merchandise in the back of my beat-up truck, affectionately named “Kuro”, get inside and drive into town.

It’s weird, all sorts of odd things have been happening to Gensokyo recently. First, these “cars” and “trucks” show up, fascinating machines that are self-propelling transportation. Then, these odd roads made of relatively smooth stone called “streets” appear throughout Gensokyo. That particular incident caused a bit of an uproar, but it turned out to be somewhat of a blessing, as it provided pathways for the “cars” and “trucks”. Whether they were used for such in the Outside World is a mystery, but whatever they were used for, they have a purpose here now.

Soon, I arrived in town. Still raining. The rain created a lonesome sound against the windows of Ol’ Kuro, as well as the shingles of the rooftops above. I got out of the truck after I parked it in a reclusive alleyway, opening up the umbrella as I did so. Thus, I started waiting.

And waiting, and waiting, and then some more waiting. After what seemed like forever, I finally saw the figure I wanted to see. A silver-haired woman with dark-blue eyes, in a black and gray pinstriped jacket and pants, appeared in front of me in an instant. She stood with all the formality in the world, her face simple and to the point. “Good afternoon.” She says formally, giving a slight bow as she does so. I just look at her and shake my head at the odd outfit she wears now. That’s another part that’s changed about Gensokyo, the outfits. Not everybody has changed, but some of the clothing I see is just odd.

“Good afternoon to you too, Sakuya-san.” I say, just barely succeeding at not sounding annoyed.

Sakuya looks at the truck, and points to it. “Is the merchandise here?”

I simply move to the back and pull out a dark-gray case, stifling the urge to sigh as I do so. I put the case on the hood and open it, revealing a dazzling array of illicit items. Luck charms, endangered herbs, forbidden scrolls, counterfeiting plates, the works. I have quite the clientele to please back at Hakurei Shrine. Of course, I have a few pistols and gun parts there. Hey, even if you don’t know how to use Danmaku (or if you aren’t Reisen), it’s still good to have a gun holding up the small of your back. Sakuya’s eyes scan the contents to make sure everything is there, appearing satisfied after a moment. She silently and suddenly offers a wooden box, similar to my briefcase, and puts it on the ground in front of me. After I close the briefcase, I open the box and find that every single cent is there. I can’t hide my surprise at this. Normally, I just get an IOU, which might as well be a euphemism for “robbed”. The Boss must have had a very successful “donation run” recently. I gently close the box, before lifting it up and placing it in the back.

“Any news on the Amplifier Cards?” Sakuya stands there, apparently satisfied with the contents. She must have more thoroughly checked the contents with her time manipulation abilities while I was checking the box.

“Well…I still have to talk around with some people. But, I’m making some progress.” I’ve finished hiding the box by this point. Thankfully, I can make some rounds to pick up various curiosities to sell from my shop, make myself less suspicious. Sakuya bows to me. “Thank you for your time.” She then speaks to me just before I get in the truck. “The Boss wants me to offer you a place in our ranks, if you wish to have one.” At this point, I sigh. I don’t even know how many times I’ve been offered this, both by Her and by others. “No, Sakuya-san. I’m still not interested.” Sakuya has a twinge of dissapointment, before bowing to me. “Very well. Good day to you.” Before I have a chance to say goodbye, Sakuya is gone. All I can do is shake my head, and get in the car.

I rather like my freelance position. It keeps me out of all the backstabbing and in-fighting that seems to have erupted nowadays. After all, it’s bad manners to bite the hand that feeds you. With this in mind, I give a little smile as I drive away to my next location.

My name is Rinnosuke Morichika, owner and manager of Kourindou, and illicit items and weapons dealer. I work for myself. Not Reimu, not Marisa, not Sanae, just myself.
Not sure if I'll make this into a series. But, I figured I'd share this with you guys and get your opinions on this. :smallsmile: :smallcool:

InyutheBeatIs
2010-09-23, 04:57 PM
Apologies for the double post.

I realize that this is far from my best work. As a matter of fact, this was rather rushed. I also realize that this may not be the best place to post this work, especially considering the theme. I acted rather rashly. I realize this isn't exactly the place to post my bad fanfiction, and I apologize if I did so in this case.

Again, my sincerest apologies.

IncoherentEssay
2010-09-24, 03:37 AM
:smallconfused:
Bad fanfiction? You are being a bit too harsh on yourself, i'd say.
The hallmarks of bad fanfiction IMO are:
-'original' author stand-in character, with OMGWTFBBQ power-level
-wish-fullfillment
-characters acting wildly OoC, often for the sake of one of the above
You did none of these.

So, no it is not 'bad fanfiction'. What it is, is extremely specific.
To be interested, potential viewers need to care/know about Touhou and gangstermovies, as well as be interested in reading about it.
Also, GitP is a very general forum. I'd say there are around 30 posters that know/care enough about Touhou to comment/discuss. I'd estimate about 50% of those frequent A&C forum.

As to the work itself, i read it on the day it was posted, but didn't comment because i didn't really know what to say. It is not literary genius, but neither is there anything inherently terrible about it.
The one thing that threw me off is Rinnosuke wondering about what the trucksstreets* were used for outside. Isn't Rinnosuke's power the ability to know both the name and the general purpose of an item, in this case transportation?

Another thing is the setting. Most Touhou fans have some idea about what Gensokyo is like, though the exact detais wary. Similarly people have a pretty good grasp of modern settings. Mixing the two leads to many questions about how do the two interact. Are truck needed when you can fly? Where do they get fuel? How do danmaku and firearms interact? Do they coexist, if so why? The setting is currently a bit of a mystery, really.

So yeah, i'd say the ambivalent response is mostly people being unsure what to think of it. Don't fret over it too much :smallsmile:. My works in the A&C Showcase are just as ignored. So i got some new materials and started working on something better. Most people are more interested in posting their own works than commenting on others, that is just how it is.
Edit: now that i think of it, isn't this pretty much Shadowrun with less kappacybertech and an alternate setting :smalltongue:?
Edit2: *i really have no excuse for that one...

InyutheBeatIs
2010-09-24, 02:57 PM
Ah. Overreaction for the win, eh? :smalltongue:

I looked back at the writing, and I thought I wrote it in that Rinnosuke did know the purpose of the trucks. Did you mean the streets? In that case, I missed that. He would've caught that the streets are smooth roads for automobiles.

Automobiles aren't needed for those who can fly. But, people like Rinnosuke who can't fly can get a lot of use out of these. However, the fuel issue does mess me up a bit. For Rinnosuke, I would've thought that he got fuel the same way he got fuel for his oil heater, a wizard Yukari did it. But, for civilians...that's a problem.

As for firearms and danmaku, it depends. For those who know danmaku, it most likely is used in preferance to firearms. This is due partly to the availability of danmaku as well as familiarity. Firearms also have the disadvantage of using ammunition, requiring ammo to be made more or less by hand. However, there are examples of the two becoming intertwined. Reisen Inaba undoubtedly uses some mixture of the two, and Alice Margatroid probably upgraded her dolls to pack some heat to create a more literal bullet hell. At the very least, those who do have them often use firearms as more of a backup, or when danmaku would be impractical.

As for the Shadowrun bit, no clue. :smalltongue: Also, small note. The cars in this are less "brand new Lexus" and more "Model T". I wanted to go for the more film noir vibe.

Anyways, thank you. :smallsmile: