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View Full Version : Maralais' Personal Ranting Hour: Now With Lower-Case Letters!



Maralais
2011-04-05, 08:47 AM
So, I'm very, very angry today and I just wanted to yell nowhere in particular.

My problems start with my...(what was it called?) proscrination, if that's the correct noun. Normally I'm fine with keeping my priorities as they are, and school is not high in the list, but my grades are not bad, though they need a little bit working, I suppose. I have increased studies so it doesn't matter anyway. But the real problem is my museum report. We have a mad, mad history teacher who gave us research projects and wanted us to write a report, both in huge amounts, but of course, he was generous in terms of time.

Guess what I did with the given time.

Anyway, deadline is approaching and I have to actually write the report, wasting my free time in the process(at least the research projects are done by now). It feels kinda sad, not being able to join my friends while they're having fun and all, but I deserved it.

The real problem is my (de jure)Pathfinder group where I DM. It all went fine for, what, 3 weeks? With continous interruptions inbetween weeks. But I was cool with that, they all had their reasons and it wasn't a problem as long as we would leave the table happy and willing to play again next week(or whenever it is possible).

But my lovely group is showing no signs of interest to playing, and have found reasons to not come for two weeks. Last week, everyone was ready to play for actually two days, not just one, but it was canceled due to one member who said she wasn't going to come for whole week(why she wouldn't come is actually even more annoying, she had a guitar lesson and a stay over with a friend in different days, both could be cancelled, but guess what, she didn't) on sunday(and I had made all my preparations, cuz there was a chance of playing on monday). The evening I gathered the team and told them to warn me before sunday if they were not going to come and asked if they were actually enjoying the game. They all said yes and agreed to do so, they even said we could play two or three times the week later.

Flashforward to this week, due to everyone having something to do, we were going to play just today, but at noon I am told that 3 of 5 members won't be coming because they have a tango show.(That's it, I can't hold it anymore)SERIOUSLY? They had the whole week in front of them to warn me, not to mention that they could just not join the show(but it's their choice, that's not the problem). So apparently, the game where I put an enormous amount of time thinking, planning, tailoring to their tastes etc is actually something that could be canceled any minute, without an apology or a promise to play sometime else during the week.

So right now, I'll find them and say that the group is disbanded. That they can do whatever they want on Tuesdays, that I've had it. Just wanted to speak to someone about it, thanks for reading.

Crow
2011-04-05, 10:04 AM
Ah yes. I have had people agree to come to a game, and then plan something else in that time slot after they agreed. Very upsetting, as there are plenty of things I'd rather do with that time had they just told me ahead of time.

Be careful how you handle it. In my case, I finally just detonated on them for how inconsiderate they had been. There were a few weeks of not hanging out after that. Since then though, things are good and they have been more considerate in keeping their plans.

Sipex
2011-04-05, 11:03 AM
Also, be prepared for them to retaliate with "You take this too seriously." because unfortunately since it's a game some people tend to treat it as something they can just drop. They don't seem to realise that it's a combination of a game and social event.

arguskos
2011-04-05, 11:30 AM
Also, be prepared for them to retaliate with "You take this too seriously." because unfortunately since it's a game some people tend to treat it as something they can just drop. They don't seem to realise that it's a combination of a game and social event.
Allow me to explain what those people are in a single concise term: *******s.

Anyone who consistently bails like that with no regard for anyone else is a bastard, period. I've got a player right now who does this a lot, though he's nice enough to give me some warning (a week, on average, which is acceptable). However, since we cannot reschedule due to scheduling conflicts (ironic, no?), we just play without them (the full crew is five players and myself as DM, we can drop one and be alright).

Still, I feel your pain, good sir. It's pretty bastardly when players (or DMs, you're not excluded from this) bail with no warning something like an hour before the game, or when half of your group bails on you.

As for resolutions, eh. Honestly, if they've done it two or three times now, just say "hey guys, either I need an ironclad guarantee that you're showing up, or we're just not playing anymore." At the rate it appears to be going, you may want to skip the first option and go straight to "nevermind guys."

Maralais
2011-04-05, 11:45 AM
Also, be prepared for them to retaliate with "You take this too seriously." because unfortunately since it's a game some people tend to treat it as something they can just drop. They don't seem to realise that it's a combination of a game and social event.

that was the response I got to telling the aforementioned player that I was upset due to being unable to play last week. I might as well activate nerd rage if I hear that again:smallbiggrin:

Sipex
2011-04-05, 11:46 AM
The worst part is when you have friends of family trying to push other plans on you when you've already committed to a game.

Woe to those who say anything more than "I have a prior commitment which I can't break." because nobody seems to understand as it's 'just a game'.

One of my current players gets a lot of flak from his friends and roommate for his gaming habits. His friends complain that he's always out gaming (once every other week during a clear schedule) and ask him why he doesn't just drop it. His roommate tries to schedule stuff over top of his gaming nights, not understanding that it's a social event that he can't just drop because her social event is a party.

Sorry, a bit of a personal rant tangent there.

Maralais
2011-04-07, 08:16 AM
So, I talked to the team that day, and they all said "it was so sudden we couldn't refuse etc", and one actually wanted to play a game this week, but the girl who also didn't show up last week said that it was impossible for her to play this week. I guess I couldn't cheer her to make her willing enough to play.

Anyway, one member wants to start a new game with 2 players or something, which would I guess turn out to be better due to the low amount of people whose plans will clash.

That, and I still might continue the Pathfinder game if they want to continue. I doubt all of them will remember the game next week.