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begooler
2012-04-27, 11:06 AM
I'm generating a table of mishaps.

Specifically, the table is for a warforged wizard with 5% spell failure. He requested, as a custom flaw, to have a mishap happen every time he lost a spell from ASF.

Fun ideas?

Edit: Finished the table (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showpost.php?p=13237966&postcount=49), though might continue to edit it.

Marlowe
2012-04-27, 11:11 AM
No. 47 - Caster is dazed for 1 round, during which he begins singing the works of Emily Dickenson to the tune of "The Yellow Rose of Texas".

Anecronwashere
2012-04-27, 11:25 AM
percentile or what?


Oh and:
1: Your armour is hopping away! Well, the bunnies that WERE your armour. Lose all armour bonus for 3 rounds
2: You summoned the tarrasque! RUN! Run for 2 rounds in a random direction before realizing it's an illusion. No save, beats True Seeing

Fredaintdead
2012-04-27, 11:27 AM
No. 68 - Caster is sickened for 1 round, then begins to make innuendos at nearby inanimate objects.

No. 85 - Caster suddenly finds themselves facing the opposite direction, at which point arcane sparks fly from their fingers, dealing damage to the caster and all within 20ft of the caster equal to 1d4 per spell level of the spell last, all while singing random Coldplay songs.
*just had the hilarious image of the Warforged turning around suddenly, shooting off sparks while calmly singing Fix You*

Gravitron5000
2012-04-27, 11:39 AM
#42 - stunned for 1 round as you ponder the meaning of life, the universe, and everything

Marlowe
2012-04-27, 11:47 AM
No. 37-Caster is instantaneous planeshifted to the Plane of Shadow for 1-4 rounds, reappearing in the same square wearing a really dark and edgy T-shirt.

Rankar
2012-04-27, 12:04 PM
#3- You summon a swordfish and believe it to be an arcane relic of tremendous power called Ferdinand.
#4- You see through the 4th wall for 2 rounds during which time you must scream in character "All I amount to is paper, ink, and imagination!? What kind of sick people are you for doing this to us???" Afterwards you forget the entire experience.

eulmanis12
2012-04-27, 12:33 PM
#3.141592653589793221384.......
you begin reciting in charecter the digits of pi. save ends. bonus points if you realize that in D&D pi=4 (a fireball with a radius of 1 affects an area of circumfrence 8. Circumfrence=2piR=2xpix1 8=2xpix1 pi=4)

#e
instead of whatever you were trying to do, a large amount of logs appear. completely normal, natural logs.

#e^ipi
you become a mirror image of yourself.

Maxios
2012-04-27, 12:38 PM
D&D pi=4 (a fireball with a radius of 1 affects an area of circumfrence 8. Circumfrence=2piR=2xpix1 8=2xpix1 pi=4)

My mind has just been blown.

Gorgondantess
2012-04-27, 12:43 PM
#42 - stunned for 1 round as you realize the meaning of life, the universe, and everything
, which you promptly forget.

Jay R
2012-04-27, 01:09 PM
A lich appears in front of you. He looks around and says, "Dammit, is somebody using this table again?" In the next round he casts Teleport and disappears.

A giant green cloud of gas envelops your enemies. They don't appear damaged. They do appear annoyed.

Every piece of iron, steel or other hard metal within thirty feet of you turns to gold. They might be valuable, but they are lousy tools. Stabbing weapons don't work; mass weapons are at -5 for the first attack, -10 and the second, and useless from then on. Armor is at half value twice, then useless. Movement of any combatant in chain is halved. People in full plate cannot move.

Mass Cure Medium Wounds. Everyone within 300 feet, on either side, is now healed.

300 rats appear, and fight on your side.

Accidental Phantasmal Force. You spell appears to work as intended. (It's an illusion, affecting only the caster.).

All buff spells end.

Each person within 30 yards must make a Will Save. Anyone who fails rises twenty feet in the air. (This is great for spellcasters and archers, horrible for melee fighters.) If a rider saves and his horse fails, the horse rises; she had better hold on.

The spell appears to do nothing. (DO NOT read the rest to the players: there is now a floating Wish spell, waiting for anybody to use. Listen carefully for somebody to say "I wish...")

A ten-foot wide hole opens up twenty feet in front of you. You cannot see the bottom.

TurtleKing
2012-04-27, 01:19 PM
#34: [Rated M] You now have an...exotic...image(s) as Silent Image of the intended recipient(s) of the spell.

Edit: For Mature Groups Only.

Righteous Doggy
2012-04-27, 02:41 PM
Don't forget your classics! Change gender, hair color, clothing, hieght, shape, and species of you and everyone around you! so much fun just to randomly spout things off the top of your head.(or off the cursed item effects)

You could turn him into a flesh non construct being for a bit. He can realize what its like to be a real boy!(and not have his spells explode in his face)

Don't just let the spell fizzle, it was just delayed! Fizzle lightning bolt one turn, aim it at the guy he cast fireball at next!

Change the subtype of a spell, Fireball > Lightball! etc.

So many ideas... So many ideas! but all most of mine are rather random, but that just happens to be what I like. Those are the basics though.

Fayd
2012-04-27, 06:00 PM
404: Page Not Found.

You receive information that the scrying spell was unable to locate the knight in training. (Alternatively, for 1d4 days, a random page from your spellbook is missing)

Cespenar
2012-04-27, 09:03 PM
For one day, he is compelled to talk like HK-47.

Marlowe
2012-04-27, 10:59 PM
No. 13 - Caster is instantly annihilated and replaced by an identical character with the same attributes, skills, feats, status, personality, equipment, and appearance.

dariathalon
2012-04-28, 12:55 AM
I prefer things that are interesting, though not necessarily harmful. Having your spell fizzle already sucks enough. Having combat penalties heaped on top of that is just adding salt to the wound. I'd do things more like these...

Flavor of the week. Yourself and all creatures within 20 feet of you suddenly have the taste of cornbread in your mouths. Anything and everything you consume tastes exactly like cornbread. This effect gradually diminishes over the next week.

The all-powerful whizz-ard. A random target within 50 feet urinates him/herself. They do not realize your are the cause. Can put a little damper in those social situations, I'd imagine.

Pennies from heaven. A 20' by 20' area around you rains copper coins. This rain lasts for 5 rounds, dropping about 100 gp in all. Imagine the chaos if summoned up in a busy marketplace. If you're worried about giving out that kind of cash to you players (mostly at lower levels) you can always make the coins disappear after 5 minutes.

Feeling a little squirrelly. The air around you fills with small chirps and chattering, which is normally only a minor annoyance. However, during mating season many small mammals mistake this for a mating call. This can lead to awkward situations.

Nothing appears to happen. At least for the next ten minutes. Everywhere you have stepped since the spell mishap leaves a glowing footprint behind that lasts for 24 hours. The glowing footprints take about 10 minutes to appear. Depending on the situation, it may take quite some time before the caster realizes what is happening. Who knows who or what might choose to follow the glowing tracks.

A weighty situation. Gravity becomes a little stronger in the local area. Add 10% to the weight of all items within 10 feet of the caster (but not those within extradimensional spaces). Not a problem unless they are the type to squeeze right up against their encumberance limits.

Strange brew. Choose the closest two potions to the caster (roll randomly if equally close). The magic in these potions co-mingle. When someone drinks either of them they get the effects of having consumed both of them. However, the effects are somehow diminished if possible. (For example a potion of healing and a potion of invisibility might give half the healing and half the duration of invisibility.)

Endarire
2012-04-28, 02:48 AM
Look up D&D 2E Wild Magic/Wild Surge charts, like this one (http://www.planetbaldursgate.com/bg2/character/classes/tables/wildsurge.shtml).

Dingle
2012-04-28, 08:35 AM
it'd probably be worth having a set of new targets.
including, but not limited to:
caster, nearest possible target, farthest possible target, closest ally, closest enemy, switch from single target to area or vice versa

Draconi Redfir
2012-04-28, 08:46 AM
413: You believe yourself to be a young human boy standing in his room. What is your name?

612: You believe yourself to be an angry gray-skinned alien boy with small nubby orange honrs. You are standing in your room. What is your name?

1025: You explode in a massive detonation, leaving behind a large green star twice your original mass. Any allies that may have been caught in the blast emerge from the star unharmed, and in fact more powerful then before, gaining DR 10/law or chaos.

111,111: you instantly change to a random class, loosing all benefits of your old class, and gaining all the benefits of your new. Your name, gender, race, and ability scores stay the same. Alignment may change according to the demands of the new class.

The Bandicoot
2012-04-28, 03:08 PM
I see what you did there draconi

Error 87 you believe yourself to be a zucchini

Slipperychicken
2012-04-28, 09:27 PM
Error 218: A very dense 10x10ft swarm of butterflies flies out of your mouth (and eye-holes if applicable), providing an effect identical to Obscuring Mist. It flies 1d6x5ft in a random direction (roll d8 to determine) each round on your turn, for one round per caster level.


Error 219: Your spell (if 3rd level or higher) is now Fireball, cast at the same target, using the same caster level and save DC of the spell you intended to cast.


Error 220: Your failed spell creates an explosion of feces, leaving a 15x15ft square centered on you, and all creatures within, covered in the nasty stuff, imposing a -4 on charisma-based checks (Reflex to reduce the penalty to -2 and only be half-covered), and the area is affected as though by Grease, for one minute per caster level.

Vinyadan
2012-04-29, 04:57 AM
Error: An unknown force slaps you in the face with a rainbow trout.

Error: You feel a moment of inscapable doom!

Error: You can see the Ethereal Plane for the next 5 rounds.

Kobold-Bard
2012-04-29, 05:01 AM
it'd probably be worth having a set of new targets.
including, but not limited to:
caster, nearest possible target, farthest possible target, closest ally, closest enemy, switch from single target to area or vice versa

Re: bold - so if you're in a spherical game world it hits the person as close to the opposite side of the world to you, and if you're in a flat world the people who live near the edge live in constant fear of random spell effects bombarding them from careless Warforged mages?

Slipperychicken
2012-04-29, 03:25 PM
Re: bold - so if you're in a spherical game world it hits the person as close to the opposite side of the world to you, and if you're in a flat world the people who live near the edge live in constant fear of random spell effects bombarding them from careless Warforged mages?

Farthest Possible Target would mean you target a randomly-determined Elder Evil. Of course, most spells have a maximum range, and also need to worry about line of sight/effect/etc.

docnessuno
2012-04-29, 06:03 PM
404: Page Not Found.

You receive information that the scrying spell was unable to locate the knight in training. (Alternatively, for 1d4 days, a random page from your spellbook is missing)

Best mishap ever for a warforged (emphasis mine)

The Glyphstone
2012-04-29, 06:26 PM
I'd make it the page that the spell you miscast was written on, but otherwise it's hilarious.

nedz
2012-04-29, 06:47 PM
No. 1 - You appear to have turned into a Larch.

icefractal
2012-04-29, 07:26 PM
* Spontaneous Generation: The spell turns into a Living Spell (ECS, I think), regardless of whether it would normally qualify. It's not under your control.
* Spontaneous Swarm: Pick a 1st level spell or cantrip from the same school - 1d4*(spell level) living spells of that are created (not under your control).
* Time Bomb I: Nothing happens. The next time a mishap happens, this spell gets cast instead of whatever was being cast, but with the same targets (as much as applicable).
* Time Bomb II: Nothing happens. The next time you prepare spells, half of them are converted to this spell.
* Time Bomb III: Nothing happens. The next time you try to cast this spell, it automatically fails and you get a triple mishap.

Fayd
2012-04-29, 10:19 PM
I'd make it the page that the spell you miscast was written on, but otherwise it's hilarious.

I formally change my suggestion to this.

Greyfeld85
2012-04-30, 01:33 AM
Error #34: You are forced to spend a full-round action seductively stripping off your clothes while bad porn music plays in the background.

Error #300: A barbarian appears in front of you and kicks you in the chest, screaming at the top of his lungs, "THIS. IS. EBERRON!!!"

Error #3: A nearby bush breaks out in a medley of bad folksongs, interrupting your spellcasting. (I wonder if anybody is going to get this reference >.>)

Rixx
2012-04-30, 01:58 AM
- The spell appears to function normally, but it's an illusion - it actually has no effect whatsoever.

- The arm used to cast the spell falls off. The arm can be reattached as a move action (but first must be picked up).

- Another prepared spell of the same level as the lost spell is cast instead. This spell is randomly selected - both the fizzled spell and the randomly selected spell are lost.

- The spell appears to fizzle uneventfully - however, the spell suddenly comes into effect 1d3 rounds later.

- The caster unexpectedly falls asleep for 1d4 rounds, even if immune to sleep effects. The next creature to touch the caster suddenly suffers the effects of the fizzled spell, which interrupts any coup de gras attempts. If the caster is undisturbed until the duration of the sleep effect expires, the fizzled spell becomes re-prepared.

- The spell goes off normally, and the caster believes the spell has been miraculously re-prepared. If the caster attempts to cast the spell again, the spell's effects are reversed, if possible.

- The fizzled spell is lost - however, the next time the caster casts any spell, the spell that fizzled previously is also spontaneously cast, with the effects centered on the target of the new casting.

- The spell fails - instead, a small wooden figure of the caster appears, which immediately begins dancing and spouting off the caster's most embarrassing secrets every round until destroyed. (Use the statistics of a tiny animated object).

- The spell fails, and the target and caster unexpectedly switch places. If the target is an area, the caster switches places with one randomly selected creature in the area.

- The caster can't stop himself from going through the motions of casting the spell, and continues to motion and chant for 1d3 additional rounds. At the end of this period, if the spell is not interrupted, it goes off normally, with the effect of the Empower Spell metamagic feat applied (or the Extend Spell metamagic feat if Empower Spell does not apply).

Alabenson
2012-04-30, 02:30 PM
** Wizard is forced to do nothing but dance "The Robot" for 1d6 rounds
** Instead of the spell effect, Robot Rock (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sFZjqVnWBhc&ob=av3e) plays loudly enough for everyone within 300 ft. to hear.
** Wizard's forearms detach and fight on their own for 1d4 rounds; Treat as a pair of +1 dancing gauntlets; wizard is unable to cast any spell with a somatic component for the duration.
** Wizard transforms into Roy Wood and and performs See My Baby Jive (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8PdHg84zUE).

nedz
2012-04-30, 02:49 PM
- Everything goes really quiet

- The spell gets Widened

- The spell hits the intended target, and then Chains back to the caster, and then starts chaining onto the next nearest person until it misses (touch attack rolls required for the second and subsequent chainings).

- The spell becomes Invisible

- The spell becomes Minimised (opposite of Maximise)

- The spell goes off at range zero

- The spell has the opposite effect

Jay R
2012-04-30, 04:26 PM
Strobe effect: Your spell has double effect (but no extended time). (Don't tell them yet that all spells this round will have double effect. No spells will work at all next round. All spells will have double effect the round after that. Continue as long as it's funny.)

The spell does not work, but you now have 100 times as much of the material component. (Hope your current spell needed gold, not guano!)

Mirror effect (only for a spell that has a set location). The spell works, exactly where you wanted it, but it is duplicated in a location on the other side of you. (If you put a Fireball 30 feet in front of you, there's another 30 feet behind you.)

Transpose (only for a spell with a specific target). You and the target switch places.

Trigger: Roll a 1d4:
1 - caster
2 - target
3 - random individual withing 20 feet of either
0 - all of the above
Every magic item on the person effected activates, whether currently being wielded or not.

Vocalize target. The spell does not go off until the caster actually names somebody or something. That becomes the new target. ("Roger, watch out for that dragon!" makes Roger the target of the spell you cast two rounds ago, if it's the first thing you say afterwards.

De-buff. All buffing spells in the encounter go away.

Nyes the Dark
2012-04-30, 04:49 PM
*The target and the caster switch Alignments for 1d4 Rounds. If an Area spell, trade alignments with a dice-determined roll.

*The spell, instead of the normal effect, summons 9 large stones, each 20 feet from the caster. Every round, the nearest creature to each rock (roll for equally distanced creatures) is suddenly drawn to the rock, and they must sit on the rock (save ends).

*The caster is knocked unconsious (save ends) and levitated 100 feet into the air, lowering 10 feet each round.

*The caster suddenly gains synesthesia, and can taste colors, hear smells, and feel sounds, for 1d4 days.

Starbuck_II
2012-05-01, 07:42 AM
-A man in a red cape and blue shirt, flys beside you/lands, and shouts as he punches you in the gut, "I am a man!"

DiscipleofBob
2012-05-01, 09:11 AM
- Being a warforged, you suddenly develop an actual gender (50% male, 50% female) for 1d8 days. You're still a warforged for all intents and purposes and you still have the appearance of a robot, but your appearance has been changed to appear much more masculine and feminine right down to your body type, you have fully functional "hardware" and you suddenly have to deal with certain "urges" for the duration of the effect.

- You summon a small ineffectual construct or similar summoned creature which does nothing but dance and sing, possibly in annoying rhymes.

- You start to glow a random color for 1d12 hours.

- Your torso and head detach from your legs and reappear 5 squares away in a random direction in line of sight. Your torso and head are now floating a few feet off the ground and function normally. They move in perfect synchronization with your legs in the same direction as if you were still together. This means until the effect wears off it's virtually impossible to get you back together, and that your enemies now have two targets instead of one.

- Overdose of Bull's Strength - You become a minotaur for 1d4 rounds, during which time you go berserk and start attacking the nearest living thing, enemy, ally, or neutral. After 1d4 rounds you revert to normal.

- Overdose of Cat's Grace - Same as above, though you become a Weretiger.

- Overdose of Bear's Endurance - Same as above, though you become a Dire Bear.

- Overdose of Fox's Cunning - Your mind is suddenly filled with a large influx of knowledge, moreso than even your brain can hope to comprehend at once. You fall into a comatose, gibbering, drooling mess for 1d4 rounds as your brain tries to comprehend the secrets of the universe. When the effect fades, you retain none of the knowledge or the experience, but you have a moderate headache and the feeling you've forgotten one or more very important things.

- Overdose of Owl's Wisdom - Your sensory perception goes through the roof as you are able to see infinitely far and microscopically small details, hear even the slightest noise clearly, smell every conceivable odor, and feel everything and its temperature from a mile around. Your brain cannot process the sensory information and overloads. For 1d4 rounds, you are effectively blinded, deafened, and have no senses whatsoever. You may still act normally.

- Overdose of Eagle's Splendor - Your Charisma is exponentially raised so that people suddenly see you as a god, or something terrible. All targets around you, enemy or ally, either attack you on sight, run away, or fall prone in worship for 1d4 rounds. This affects all targets who can sense you. All Diplomacy, Bluff, or Intimidate checks you make automatically fail as the targets around you cannot actually choose their actions.

- You suddenly get a vision or a prophecy comes forth from your mouth. The material and validity of said prophecy is up to the DM.

Nyes the Dark
2012-05-01, 06:37 PM
*Effect fails, but the target suddenly cannot move from their spot, since they are uncontrollably dancing. This effect lasts for 1d6 rounds.

*The caster is now transformed into a plant-like being for 1d4 hours.

QuidEst
2012-05-01, 09:33 PM
- One of the caster's arms is paralyzed for 1d4 rounds.
- The spell does not take effect. Roll 1d4 to determine which type of Bag of Tricks is emulated: 1, Gray; 2, Rust; 3, Tan; 4, roll twice (ignoring 4s). Treat the spell as instead being a (or two) Bag of Tricks of the appropriate type(s) used against the target. If the target is more than 20 feet away, the animal appears 20 feet away in the target's direction. If target of the spell was self, treat the animal as appearing 20 feet above the caster's head. (NOTE: The DM may wish to reduce the animal's duration to one minute.)
- The magical energies congeal. Both caster and target take 1d4 damager per level of spell cast. If target was self or an ally, damage is only taken to self, and only once. Usual resistances and immunities apply.
- Caster takes -4 to saves against fear for 1d6 hours. If caster is immune fear effects, caster instead loses this immunity for 1d6 hours.
- Caster gains a +4 bonus to diplomacy for 2d6 hours, but is unable to tell a lie during this period.
- Caster changes appearance slightly to look scruffier. The effect stacks with any effects that make the target scruffy.
- Both the target and caster appear to be on fire, but do not notice it themselves. This is an illusory effect.
- Caster's arcane failure chance increases by 5% for 1d4 rounds. In addition, the caster may choose to fail any spell cast during this period without rolling. If they do so, they roll failure result twice and pick the result.
- Caster is at least twice as awesome for 1d6 rounds. The exact details of this are left to the DMs discretion, but it does not provide any mechanical benefit. Suggestions include emanating dramatic music, speaking in Morgan Freeman's voice, or having flame decals.
- Roll twice, and perform both effects. This result stacks with itself.
- Congratulations! You rolled this specific result! As a reward, the intended spell is cast without expending a spell slot.
- 1d4 apostrophes appear in the caster's name. These last for 5 - the number of apostrophes hours. The placement of these apostrophes and the new pronunciation is left to the DM.



Consider giving the player a cantrip (target: self) that allows him to roll this. There will either have to be a lot of unpleasant things on the list, or really powerful effects (eg. floating Wish) will have to be kept out, but this would make things fun. Please let us know what the final table is! I've always wanted a sorcerer who uses "Please let this work, please let this work, please let this work…" for all his verbal components. He wrings his hands nervously or crosses his fingers behind his back for any somatic components.

Crafty Cultist
2012-05-01, 10:27 PM
The spell simple fizzles, and the caster is compelled to look at his hands in puzzlement, at which point the magic explodes in his face, dealing 1d4 points of damage per spell level.

Unseenmal
2012-05-03, 12:04 PM
Error #3: A nearby bush breaks out in a medley of bad folksongs, interrupting your spellcasting. (I wonder if anybody is going to get this reference >.>)

The Three Amigos clearly

EDIT: To add to the thread...these are all actual Windows Errors...just re-fluffed.

ERROR_FILE_NOT_FOUND: you try to cast a spell from another classes spell list and believe it went off correctly.

ERROR_BAD_ENVIRONMENT: You cast a debuff on an ally or a buff spell on an enemy.

ERROR_NO_MORE_FILES: You believe you have already cast all of your spells for the day, expended all wand charges and used up all per use items for 1d4 rounds

ERROR_READ_FAULT: You believe you had read a spell wrong while praying/memorizing and simply lose it

ERROR_FAIL_I24: You fail to cast any spell, believing you need higher intelligence. (INT 24) for 1d4 rounds

ERROR_SEM_OWNER_DIED: You believe you have died....DM discretion on timeframe

ERROR_BUFFER_OVERFLOW: You must cast a spell you have memorized based on the length of the names in order from longest to shortest for 1d6 rounds

Hell...just go HERE (http://msdn.microsoft.com/en-us/library/windows/desktop/ms681381(v=vs.85).aspx) for any more Wonderful Windows mishaps to choose from.

QuidEst
2012-05-04, 11:56 AM
:smallconfused:
Failing to cast a spell is a waste of a turn… not being able to cast for up to four rounds because of that seems like it'd get old pretty fast. I suppose it depends on what there is to balance it out. (The 5% failure chance is for +2 armor bonus that doesn't stack with Mage Armor and ties up the robe slot, so it's not like they're getting something great in exchange to begin with.)

nedz
2012-05-04, 02:07 PM
:smallconfused:
Failing to cast a spell is a waste of a turn… not being able to cast for up to four rounds because of that seems like it'd get old pretty fast. I suppose it depends on what there is to balance it out. (The 5% failure chance is for +2 armor bonus that doesn't stack with Mage Armor and ties up the robe slot, so it's not like they're getting something great in exchange to begin with.)

Whats being built here is like a critical fumble table for failed Arcane Failure rolls. So the odds of this happening would be something like 1% after a fumble. So YMMV, but its not as bad as it seems.

I was going to suggest looking at the Wild Surge table from Tome of Magic [2E], but its a lot more fun to build this thread from scratch.

VeliciaL
2012-05-04, 03:33 PM
Not to mention, if I read the OP right, it was the player's idea. And really, it seems like a fun concept, especially for a somewhat silly campaign. It's nice to have a character that's fun to be even when you lose.

QuidEst
2012-05-04, 03:59 PM
True. It just seems a little harsh unless you can also get bonus casting or something neat back. Of course, my list had an awful lot of "nice" (or at least potentially useful) things on it.

Heh… if the failure results are modeled on Windows errors, going into the negatives should be a BSOD. XP

nedz
2012-05-04, 04:40 PM
- An image of a small blue square appears in front of you. Written on this square are the word STOP, followed by some arcane symbols, in white text.

begooler
2012-05-05, 09:46 PM
Hilarious ideas.
I am making a list to use of many of the errors listed. Living spells, buffer overflow, and page not found are my favorites so far. There will be plenty of harmless effects included.

begooler
2012-05-16, 12:22 AM
Ok, thanks people! Here's a list of errors made from most of the ideas, minus some minor edits I'll make later.
You roll a d4 and then a d20 to get the number for the error. (For example a 3, and then an 18 is error 318.

Error 101: ZOO_REQUESTED: The spell does not take effect. Roll 1d4 to determine which type of Bag of Tricks is emulated: 1, Gray; 2, Rust; 3, Tan; 4, roll twice (ignoring 4s). Treat the spell as instead being a (or two) Bag of Tricks of the appropriate type(s) used against the target. If the target is more than 20 feet away, the animal appears 20 feet away in the target's direction. If target of the spell was self, treat the animal as appearing 20 feet above the caster's head.

Error 102: COMPONENT_OVERFLOW: The spell does not work, but you now have 100 times as much of the material component.

Error 103: BAD_COPY: The spell fails - instead, a small wooden figure of the caster appears, which immediately begins dancing and spouting off insults towards the caster. (Use the statistics of a tiny animated object).

Error 104: PIED_PIPER: 3 swarms of rats appear, and fight on your side.

Error 105: TOO_MANY_TOKENS: A 20' by 20' area around you rains copper coins. This rain lasts for 5 rounds, dropping about 100 gp in all.

Error 106: TROUT_SLAP: An unknown force slaps you in the face with a rainbow trout.

Error 107: SPONTANEOUS_SWARM: Pick a 1st level spell or cantrip from the same school - 1d4*(spell level) living spells of that are created (not under your control).

Error 108 BUTTERFLIES_REQUESTED: A very dense 10x10ft swarm of butterflies flies out of your mouth (and eye-holes if applicable), providing an effect identical to Obscuring Mist. It flies 1d6x5ft in a random direction (roll d8 to determine) each round on your turn, for one round per caster level.

Error 109: BAD_SQL: The air around you fills with small chirps and chattering, which is normally only a minor annoyance. For 1d6 rounds, a swarm of squirrels is summoned, growing one square per round. The squirrels do not attack, but create difficult terrain and distract as a swarm.

Error 110: FIREWALL: Wall of Fire, as the spell. You can control were the the wall appears, within normal limits of range, but you can't choose to not cast the spell.

Error 111: PERMANENT_FAILURE: One ongoing spell is made permanent, even if it would not normally qualify. It can be dispelled by dispel magic.

Error 112: ARENA_TRASHED: Yarn, flotsam and other debris is spontaneously generated. Entangle, as the spell. You can control the location of the spell within the normal limits of range, but cannot avoid casting it.

Error 113: BAD_SYNTAX: You and all creatures with language within range of the spell can't speak without making egregious grammatical errors for the next 1d4 hours. These errors don't cause spell failure, but impose a -10 on all diplomacy, bluff, and intimidate checks.

Error 114: UNSPECIFIED_FIELD: One component of the spell is changed: an evocation spell uses a different type of energy, a summoning spell summons something completely different, a buff spell gives a different type of bonus, etc.

Error 115: IT_IS_RAINING_FISH: It's raining fish. (covering area of the spell, creating the effect of grease. The effect is permanent, but the fish can be burned away, disintegrated, moved out of the way, etc.)

Error 116: ENCRYPTED: You summon 1 skeleton per spell level. The skeleton is not under your control.

Error 117: BAD_STRING. You are entangled. A reflex save negates the effect. You can escape with a DC 20 strength or escape artist check.

Error 118: HELLO_WORLD: You summon a random magical beast. It's an infant, possibly an egg. Enjoy your new pet.

Error 119: ROUNDING_ERROR: Every time you summon something for the next 24 hours roll a 1d2. Odd rolls, the number of things summoned is minus 1. Even, it is +1. This includes anything summoned from another mishap.

Error 120: INVALID_CAP: Your hair is a bird and your argument is invalid.

Error 201-220: SPONTANEOUS_GENERATION: The spell turns into a Living Spell , regardless of whether it would normally qualify. It's not under your control.

Error 301: SOMATIC_CRASH: One of the caster's arms is paralyzed for 1d4 rounds.

Error 302: INTERNAL_ERROR: Both caster and target take 1d4 damager per level of spell cast. If target was self or an ally, damage is only taken to self, and only once. Usual resistances and immunities apply.

Error 303: DEVICE_REQUIRES_CLEANING: - You are filthy until you clean yourself.

Error 304: NO_SUCH_USER: You don't exist for one round.

Error 305: OTTO_REQUESTED: Wizard is forced to do nothing but dance "The Robot" for 1d6 rounds

Error 306: TOTAL_SOMATIC_FAILURE: The arm used to cast the spell falls off. The arm can be reattached as a move action (but first must be picked up).

Error 307: SLEEP_MODE: The caster unexpectedly falls asleep for 1d4 rounds, even if immune to sleep effects. The next creature to touch the caster suddenly suffers the effects of the fizzled spell, which interrupts any coup de gras attempts. If the caster is undisturbed until the duration of the sleep effect expires, the fizzled spell becomes re-prepared.

Error 308: OFFSET_ALIGNMENT_VIOLATION: ANARCHIC: All creatures within area gain DR 5/chaos for the duration of the spell, or until the caster prepares spells again, whichever is shorter.

Error 309: OFFSET_ALIGNMENT_VIOLATION: AXIOMATIC: All creatures within area gain DR 5/law for the duration of the spell, or until the caster prepares spells again, whichever is shorter.

Error 310: WEIGHTY_SITUATION: Gravity becomes a little stronger in the local area. Add 10% to the weight of all items within 10 feet of the caster (but not those within extradimensional spaces). Not a problem unless they are the type to squeeze right up against their encumberance limits.

Error 311: STACKING_FAILURE: Caster's arcane failure chance increases by 5% for 1d4 rounds. In addition, the caster may choose to fail any spell cast during this period without rolling. If they do so, they roll failure result twice and pick the result.

Error 312: REPEATING_ERROR: Roll twice, and perform both effects. This result stacks with itself.

Error 313: SUCCESS: The intended spell is cast without expending a spell slot.

Error 314: 3.141592653589793221384…….
You begin reciting in character the digits of pi, and cannot cast spells for three rounds. At the end of the three rounds, you instantly cast a random "magic circle" spell.

Error 315: NULL: Everything goes really quiet. Magical silence for duration and range of spell.

Error 316: TRANSPOSITION: (only for a spell with a specific target). You and the target switch places. If the spell doesn't have a target, roll again.

Error 317: TRIGGER_OVERLOAD:
Roll a 1d4:
1 - caster
2 - target
3 - random individual within 20 feet of either
0 - all of the above
Every magic item which can normally be activated by a swift or free action on the person effected activates, whether currently being wielded or not. (Items inside of extra dimensional spaces are not affected.)

Error 318: REBOOT: All buffing spells in the encounter go away.

Error 319: FIXED: Mass Cure Medium Wounds. Everyone within 300 feet, on either side, is now healed

Error 320: TRACKING_REQUESTED: Nothing appears to happen. At least for the next ten minutes. Everywhere you have stepped since the spell mishap leaves a glowing footprint behind that lasts for 24 hours. The glowing footprints take about 10 minutes to appear. Depending on the situation, it may take quite some time before the caster realizes what is happening. Who knows who or what might choose to follow the glowing tracks.

Error 401: EVENT_PENDING_1: Nothing happens. The next time a mishap happens, this spell gets cast instead of whatever was being cast, but with the same targets (as much as applicable).

Error 402: EVENT_PENDING_2: Nothing happens. The next time you prepare spells, half of them are converted to this spell.

Error 403: EVENT_PENDING_3: Nothing happens. The next time you try to cast this spell, it automatically fails and you get a triple mishap.

Error 404: PAGE_NOT_FOUND.
You receive information that the scrying spell was unable to locate the knight in training. (Additionally for 1d4 days, the page from your spellbook that the spell is written on is missing)

Error 405: NO_PROBLEMS_DETECTED: The spell appears to function normally, but it's an illusion - it actually has no effect whatsoever.

Error 406: BAD_AUTOCORRECT: Another prepared spell of the same level as the lost spell is cast instead. This spell is randomly selected - both the fizzled spell and the randomly selected spell are lost.

Error 407: NO_RESPONSE: The spell appears to fizzle uneventfully - however, the spell suddenly comes into effect 1d3 rounds later.

Error 408: REQUEST_INCOMPLETE: The fizzled spell is lost - however, the next time the caster casts any spell, the spell that fizzled previously is also spontaneously cast, with the effects centered on the target of the new casting.

Error 409: META_EXPANSION_TOO_LONG: The caster can't stop himself from going through the motions of casting the spell, and continues to motion and chant for 1d3 additional rounds. At the end of this period, if the spell is not interrupted, it goes off normally, with the effect of the Empower Spell metamagic feat applied (or the Extend Spell metamagic feat if Empower Spell does not apply).

Error 410: NO_RANGE_SUPPLIED: The spell goes off at range zero.

Error 411: BAD_ENVIRONMENT: You cast a debuff on an ally or a buff spell on an enemy.

Error 412: NO_MORE_FILES: You believe you have already cast all of your spells for the day, expended all wand charges and used up all per use items for 1d4 rounds

Error 413: BUFFER_OVERFLOW: You must cast a spell you have memorized based on the length of the names in order from longest to shortest for 1d6 rounds

Error 414: UNDETECTED: The spell becomes Invisible

Error 415: DUPLICATE_REQUEST: Mirror effect (only for a spell that has a set location). The spell works, exactly where you wanted it, but it is duplicated in a location on the other side of you. (If you put a Fireball 30 feet in front of you, there's another 30 feet behind you.)

Error 416: BAD_LENGTH: The spell gets Widened

Error 417: INVERSE_REQUEST: The spell has the opposite effect

Error 418: YOU'RE_A_TEAPOT. You are a teapot for 1d6 rounds. Teapot's can't cast spells.

Error 419: INSUFFICIENT_POWER: The spell becomes Minimized (opposite of Maximize)

Error 420: NO_TARGET_SPECIFIED: The spell does not go off until the caster actually names somebody or something. That becomes the new target. ("Roger, watch out for that dragon!" makes Roger the target of the spell you cast two rounds ago, if it's the first thing you say afterwards.

Techsmart
2012-05-16, 12:39 AM
You take a Melf's Acid Arrow... to the knee. You now believe you are a guard (will negates second portion).

Your spell creates a very large burst of flowers. Your enemies now smell faintly of fresh lavender (pleasant change on that ogre).

Your spell succeeds, but is on a random target/location (targetted spells must choose a target, but location spells can be anywhere) and direction.

Your spell disguises you, as the king's jester.

Your buff spell covers your target in chicken feathers. His helmet (if worn) has an illusory beak on it.

Arutema
2012-05-16, 04:21 AM
403 Forbidden - The spell fails, and it becomes a crime to cast it in the current locality for 1d4 days.

404 Not Found - The spell fails, and is missing from the caster's spellbook for 1d4 days.

500 Infernal Servitor Error - All familiars or called or summoned creatures with the [evil] subtype within 100 feet become hostile to the caster.

503 Service Temporarily Unavailable - The spell fails, but the caster may attempt to cast it again in 1d4 rounds.

Diego Havoc
2012-05-16, 08:54 AM
These are great! Certainly made me laugh.


ERROR: WINDOWS_FROZEN - All windows within 100ft are covered in a thick coating of ice. If there are no windows nearby, a 10ft wall of ice with a 3ft by 2ft rectangular opening in the middle appears near the caster.

ERROR: KERNEL_DATA_ERROR - The spell works, but the caster begins coughing up popcorn. This ends at the beginning of his next turn, preventing him from making attacks of opportunity for 1 round.

ERROR: FATAL_EXCEPTION - The target becomes immortal for 1d6 x 10 minutes. They cannot be killed, even if their HP drops to -10 or below. They do not regenerate wounds or HP naturally, but can be healed by magic normally.

ERROR: LANGUAGE_NOT_SET - The target cannot speak normally, instead only being able to grunt like a caveman for 1 minute. Prevents spells with verbal components from being cast.

ERROR: NOSMOKE.EXE (http://www.comedycorner.org/75.html)_HAS_FAILED - The target is surrounded by a thick cloud of black smoke that obscures all vision for 1d4 rounds.

Telonius
2012-05-16, 12:25 PM
507 Insufficient Storage - For 1d4 hours you are unable to place anything in any extradimensional space (bag of holding, haversack, etc).
508 Loop Detected - Take 1d4 bludgeoning damage from DMG being hurled at your head.

Dr Bwaa
2012-05-16, 02:16 PM
Heh; these are all great. Reminds me a little of the Chaos Mage (from some 3.0 Mongoose splatbook), where you have to make a caster check to cast any spell, and if you get a 1 you progress a bit further into total physical and mental chaos (uncontrollable random growths, random ability fluctuations, etc).