Belkar needs a girlfriend

[Professor Tanhauser]

You know, having a girlfriend can really improve one's disposition. OK, it may not work for nale too much, but a lot of the characters in the strip have had pleasant encounters with members of the opposite gender. Hell, even Durkon got horizontal a while back.

I wish rich would work in a girlfriend for the belkster, just to see if doin' the hobbit with two backs improved his disposition.

Plus I think it would be funny as hell to have belkar maybe asking other members of the strip for advice of girls....:smallbiggrin:

[Xanthos]

Somehow, Belkar having a girlfriend is inherently wrong. Whores, on the other hand...

[Mr.Burn]

Somehow, Belkar having a girlfriend is inherently wrong. Whores, on the other hand...


I concure in 100%

[Demented]

"Fine, I love you.
And by that, I mean that your grapple is gradually restricting the flow of oxygenated blood to my brain, giving me a distinct feeling of elation in your presence."

Perhaps what should be most frightening is that I felt compelled to spoiler it.

[Suki_the_Pure]

Scrubbing bubbles.

*ahem*

I don't think Belkar has what it takes to get a girlfriend, let along keep one. He's too selfish. Violent, too, but it's the selfishness that'd keep him single. He's so self-absorbed he'd never be able to actually CARE about a girl, and any girl who A) enjoyed being treated like a sex toy, or B) put up with this crap because she thought she could change him... well, that character would be the first on my God, I Hope They Get Killed Off list.

[FlawedParadigm]

Yeah, I think Belkar needs to stick to the kind of girls that go on sale 2-for-1.

That is, unless he has some major character development ahead that totally changes who he is.

The more I think about it though, cliche though it might be, that could be an interesting plotline as much as him staying forever the same. We'll leave it up to Rich, aye?

[Suki_the_Pure]

I'm sure IF The Giant did something like this, it'd turn out pure awesome and completely in character and everyone but the most uptight readers would love it. But I'm also sure that ONLY the Giant could think of something that'd be in character and totally awesome.

Meaning my puny imagination is unable to meet the challange.

[skinkatlarge]

No one thinks he could fall for a hot psychotic chick that out-Belkars Belkar himself? I could totally see it. His proto-brain can demonstrably generate feelings of respect (too lazy to look up the strips now, but I know he's expressed respect - for Roy's sadistically leaving the bandit leader and sorceress daughter tied up together, for one) and even awe. I bet the lady who could squick Belkar would have a devoted slave.

I just don't think I want to see it in OotS, unless she was a short-term addition to the cast with a reason to be there and a reason to leave shortly without him.

[Demented]

A Belkarian equivalent to Hilgya?

Such as, say, YakYak, YokYok's evil half-kender sister?

[Godehart]

Maybe Belkar does need a girlfriend... but what kind of crazy/demented/stupid girl would want belkar as a boyfriend?

[Jazzvader]

Maybe Belkar does need a girlfriend... but what kind of crazy/demented/stupid girl would want belkar as a boyfriend?

You've got a point there.:belkar:

[Viscount_Grey]

Who can tell what the future may hold.... maybe Belkar will get it on with V in a strange plot twist!

[fire_hawk]

Maybe many readers would leave after being subjected to something so disgusting. Who knows?

[A Gray Phantom]

Who can tell what the future may hold.... maybe Belkar will get it on with V in a strange plot twist!
:smalleek: Bah!! My brain is going to implode :smallfrown:...

[Demented]

Belkera's probably never going to "get it on" with V any more than he has already.

V and Sabine, on the other hand, now seems much more likely. Sabine can even handle the ambiguous gender issue with style!

[Aimbot]

Yeah, I think Belkar needs to stick to the kind of girls that go on sale 2-for-1.

That is, unless he has some major character development ahead that totally changes who he is.

The more I think about it though, cliche though it might be, that could be an interesting plotline as much as him staying forever the same. We'll leave it up to Rich, aye?

Or even better, convincingly fakes it to get a plea bargain...
Then it's back to the stabbity high life.

[Behold_the_Void]

I honestly can't see Belkar wanting to be tied down by a girlfriend.

Actually, I honestly can't see Belkar not wanting to eventually stab any woman he spends an extended period of time with in the face. Or man for that matter. Really, I honestly can't see Belkar not wanting to stab just about anybody he knows for an extended period of time in the face.

[Tomada]

Belkar will only find love in a masochistic girl

[Jazzvader]

Who can tell what the future may hold.... maybe Belkar will get it on with V in a strange plot twist!

I really doubt it they hate each other's guts.
:belkar:&:vaarsuvius: oh no more likely to be belkar and Samantha the sorceress from number 159 to 171 and number 189.

[warmachine]

The trouble is, Belkar is remorselessly selfish and doesn't even recognise people's right to live, let alone not to have their feelings crushed. Any partner with the will to withstand Belkar's nastiness would realise they'll never get anything back and leave. If he finds someone who yearns to be abused, he'll never change.

If he showed any spark of humanity (or whatever it's called), that could be worked with. Alas, a person must want to change before he can. A pity there is no such thing as permanent Owl's Wisdom.

[Iranon]

My take is that he would get bored of someone who likes to be abused in a matter of days.

If he could find himself a nice psychotic girl who shares his homicidal tendencies and odd sense of humour they could get on like a house on fire, literally.
People who generally don't give a damn about anyone else are quite likely to feel a little solidarity towards one another at least and that could be a decent starting point.

[Grasilich]

Belkar/Miko

It is meant to be.

[kaairn]

Want to see something really disturbing regarding belkar and a girlfriend?

http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e320/TheStoneyOne/theending1.gif

Don't thank me for that horrible image, thank the_stoney_one (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/member.php?u=17491) as he was the one who created it quite some time ago :tongue:

[Aldebaran]

Somehow, Belkar having a girlfriend is inherently wrong. Whores, on the other hand...

I totally agree with that statement.

´nuff said

[Amon Star]

"Fine, I love you.
And by that, I mean that your grapple is gradually restricting the flow of oxygenated blood to my brain, giving me a distinct feeling of elation in your presence."

Perhaps what should be most frightening is that I felt compelled to spoiler it.

LOL!


Belkar/Miko

It is meant to be.

:eek:


Want to see something really disturbing regarding belkar and a girlfriend?

http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e320/TheStoneyOne/theending1.gif

Don't thank me for that horrible image, thank the_stoney_one (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/member.php?u=17491) as he was the one who created it quite some time ago :tongue:

MY EYES! MY EYES! MUST CLAW OUT MY OWN EYES!

:tongue:

[mikeejimbo]

A pity there is no such thing as permanent Owl's Wisdom.

It'd be funny though, if he fell for a girl while under the effects of Owl's Wisdom, and she for him.

[TreesOfDeath]

One of the greatest ironys is that although it was invented as a joke or a way to annoy Miko lovers/haters, Miko/Belkar actually makes sense.
Their both pyschos who love to kill stuff, if Miko could dislodge the stick in her ass, it could actually work.
As in its NEVER EVER EVER going to happen in this comic, but maybe if their were an alternate universe......

Belkar getting a girl would ruin his characther. Might be intresting if she were a little crazy (cause who else would get with Belkar?)

[fangthane]

What's Belkar doing with his right hand?! My fragile little mind is warped now, WARPED I tell you!

[Ayya the Fearsome]

Scrubbing bubbles.

*ahem*

I don't think Belkar has what it takes to get a girlfriend, let along keep one. He's too selfish. Violent, too, but it's the selfishness that'd keep him single. He's so self-absorbed he'd never be able to actually CARE about a girl, and any girl who A) enjoyed being treated like a sex toy, or B) put up with this crap because she thought she could change him... well, that character would be the first on my God, I Hope They Get Killed Off list.

HELLO!!!!!!!!!! He's ayya's kind of man. Violent, destructive, no hesitation towards killing, perfect for a lvl 16 BARBARIAN!!!!!!!! Yeah, thats ayya. :tongue: haha

[Ayya the Fearsome]

I really doubt it they hate each other's guts.
:belkar:&:vaarsuvius: oh no more likely to be belkar and Samantha the sorceress from number 159 to 171 and number 189.

She died retarded one, Miko killed her, SO SHE COULD HAVE BELKAR TO HERSELF!!!!!!!! THAT EVIL WHORE!!!!!!!!!! :furious:

[Quantum Toast]

No one thinks he could fall for a hot psychotic chick that out-Belkars Belkar himself? I could totally see it. His proto-brain can demonstrably generate feelings of respect (too lazy to look up the strips now, but I know he's expressed respect - for Roy's sadistically leaving the bandit leader and sorceress daughter tied up together, for one) and even awe. I bet the lady who could squick Belkar would have a devoted slave.

I just don't think I want to see it in OotS, unless she was a short-term addition to the cast with a reason to be there and a reason to leave shortly without him.Makes sense to me.


One of the greatest ironys is that although it was invented as a joke or a way to annoy Miko lovers/haters, Miko/Belkar actually makes sense.
Their both pyschos who love to kill stuff, if Miko could dislodge the stick in her ass, it could actually work.True, Miko does seem similar to Belkar in some ways... except the ways where they're complete opposites, of course. :smallwink:

[The honest illusionist]

Finding a girl that Belkar likes isn't the problem. It's finding the girl that would want to be with Belkar that makes this impossible.

*Casts Minor Image*

:vaarsuvius:: The alternative-a Belkar who lusts after me-is too horrific to contemplate.

*Dismisses Minor Image*

[Megalomaniac2]

I'm hoping for Belkar/Miko myself. The sexual tension during their fight ("C'mon baby... do it... do it...) was through the roof, and whenever I think of the self-loathing their attraction would cause, and the nausea it would provoke throughout the cast, I laugh. Maniacally.

[Suki_the_Pure]

I'm hoping for Belkar/Miko myself. The sexual tension during their fight ("C'mon baby... do it... do it...) was through the roof, and whenever I think of the self-loathing their attraction would cause, and the nausea it would provoke throughout the cast, I laugh. Maniacally.

I'm SO glad I"m not crazy! XD

I was feeling that, too. He was having more fun baiting her than I recall him ever having. He even wanted her to wake up when he knocked her out instead of going for the kill so they could continue the chase.

Heck, he SCHEMED. Wanting her to get kicked out of the Paladins for killing him is pretty long-term for Belkar.

Yes, I consider about 10 minutes to be long-term for Belkar.

[Kesnit]

Maybe Belkar does need a girlfriend... but what kind of crazy/demented/stupid girl would want belkar as a boyfriend?

One who is "crazy/demented/stupid." :smallbiggrin: Actually, I am more in favor of "demented."

[nifty>>virago<<]

I think it'd just be strange for Belkar to have a girlfriend... it just doesn't seem to fit even when I think about it

[Callos_DeTerran]

Ah you guys have no faith. I can see Belkar finding a perfectly nice girl and start dating for a little bit. Then after she gets fed up with the EVIL! she'll probably mention it to V (Dr. Phil apprantly.) who will mention he wasn't evil with an increased Wisdom score.

At that point I figure the mystery gal will slip him a Tome of Clear Thoughts +4 and tell him to read if he wants any booty again. Presto! Nice Belkar!

[Bruenor]

I'm SO glad I"m not crazy! XD

I was feeling that, too. He was having more fun baiting her than I recall him ever having. He even wanted her to wake up when he knocked her out instead of going for the kill so they could continue the chase.

Heck, he SCHEMED. Wanting her to get kicked out of the Paladins for killing him is pretty long-term for Belkar.

Yes, I consider about 10 minutes to be long-term for Belkar.
That would be Awesome...like Miko somehow losing paladinship and her and Belkar getting together...

[Demented]

At that point I figure...
Ingenious, Callos!

Recipe
1 homocidal compulsive halfling, 30 pounds
1 Tome of Clear Thoughts +4
1 Hempen Rope, 50 feet
1 caster capable of casting 6th level Wizard spells

Take halfling and tie him up. Have caster cast Geas on halfling, with instructions to read Tome of Clear Thoughts. Untie halfling. Wait six days.

Serves: The Greater Good


One who is "crazy/demented/stupid." :smallbiggrin: Actually, I am more in favor of "demented." Should I be concerned about where this is going?

[skinkatlarge]

Ah you guys have no faith. I can see Belkar finding a perfectly nice girl and start dating for a little bit. Then after she gets fed up with the EVIL! she'll probably mention it to V (Dr. Phil apprantly.) who will mention he wasn't evil with an increased Wisdom score.

At that point I figure the mystery gal will slip him a Tome of Clear Thoughts +4 and tell him to read if he wants any booty again. Presto! Nice Belkar!
I'm pretty sure V wasn't paying attention to Belkar's muttered process of illumination. Or why would she have dispelled the Owl's Wisdom early? It looked like she was just absent-mindedly cleaning up (and providing a punchline).

[Halcyon]

Quite frankly, Belkar and Miko have a snowballs chance in hell of getting together. So do Belkar and any girl, really, if we're talking about anything half-resembling a meaningful relationship here.


What if, however, there was an alternate universe where Belkar and Miko are happily married? I can imagine the reactions would be pretty funny if the cast were to meet this alternate Belkar and Miko. You'd almost be able to hear their poor minds snap. :smalltongue:

[exxor]

Makes sense to me.

True, Miko does seem similar to Belkar in some ways... except the ways where they're complete opposites, of course. :smallwink:

That's another reason why. Haven't you heard that opposite attracts?

[krossbow]

Who can tell what the future may hold.... maybe Belkar will get it on with V in a strange plot twist!


Prompting V's mate to come and slaughter them both with untold, heretofore unrefferenced arcane powers.

[Demented]

Perhaps more confusingly... Belkar and V's mate get it on....

[Professor Tanhauser]

Oh come on! BGelakr has his personality issues, sure, but who doesn't? Elan's a moron and haley still loves him, Durkon is incredibly stuck up and the female dwarf still did the double backed dwarf with him, roy tends to be a bit self righteous (Ask his sister) and he still gets a booty talisman, so belkar could find someone too.

Maybe after some serious injuries in a fight, the belkster gets patched up by a she hobbit with gentle hands and find she actually liked being touched like that. Meanwhile the hobbit nurse respects balkars courage and strength....

Hey, it could happen. Hell, even Xena and Gabriel got it on eventually.

An interesting issue could be that belkar finds himself having to choose between helping his new 'friend' or running down and slaughtering a few dozen chunks of XP, and opts for the former. It would be nice just to see the looks on the other order members faces....

[reorith]

i kinda want to see belkar with a woman that is just as twisted as he is. like some psychotic archery focused ranger that uses wild empathy to befriend woodland creatures and then send them after her foes

that'd be hott

[knownaspirate]

i think that if Belkar got a girlfriend, it might possible ruin the comic. belkar is funny enough as it is, without someone to complete him.
i think what should happen is that he hooks up with someone, like roy and celia did, and dourkon and hylga did.
but as for going steady i don't think it was meant to happen.
like elan and haley for example.
as much as they both realize they have feelings for one another (and it would be cute for them to end up together) i just don't see it happening. it may complicate things.
but we could assume that once the quest to save the world is over they would end up together. i.e. the orcal's fortune for elan.

:elan: "will the story have a happy ending?"
"yes. for you atleast."

so while their's hope for a relantionship for those too (wow i got really off topic, swerving back on topic) [my bad]

i just don't think it would work for belkar.
muskrats on the other hand. . . :smallbiggrin:

[Orzel]

If belkar had a girlfriend, it would be hilarious. She would need to have as little respect for life as him. They would attempt to kill each other or random people as a form of flirting.

"Aaaww. You poisoned my ale."
"Thanks. spike traps are my favorite."
"A bugbear's heart. how sweet."
"You sicced an giant on me. You know I love killing giants."
"Happy Sociopath Day! Here's a dead goblin ward's skull. It canhold down papers."

[Draz74]

If belkar had a girlfriend, it would be hilarious. She would need to have as little respect for life as him. They would attempt to kill each other or random people as a form of flirting.

"Aaaww. You poisoned my ale."
"Thanks. spike traps are my favorite."
"A bugbear's heart. how sweet."
"You sicced an giant on me. You know I love killing giants."
"Happy Sociopath Day! Here's a dead goblin ward's skull. It canhold down papers."

LoL! Yeah, QFT.

[FlawedParadigm]

I'm not quite sure why anyone thinks Belkar and Miko are so different. They're both constantly looking for excuses to kill people. Miko just wants her excuses to make her look like she's in the right, while Belkar doesn't care.

Actually, I take that back. At least Belkar tends to listen if given a good reason why someone doesn't need to die (on the rare occasions that someone other than Roy gives him one), whereas Miko from what we've seen won't even respect her own Lord's trust in a group of people.

[MReav]

I don't think Belkar needs a girlfriend, nor does he want one. He's a ladies' man... and by ladies, I mean hookers.

[Holy_Knight]

I don't think Belkar has what it takes to get a girlfriend, let along keep one. He's too selfish. Violent, too, but it's the selfishness that'd keep him single.
That's a rather scary statement... :smalleek:


Oh come on! BGelakr has his personality issues, sure, but who doesn't? Elan's a moron and haley still loves him, Durkon is incredibly stuck up and the female dwarf still did the double backed dwarf with him, roy tends to be a bit self righteous (Ask his sister) and he still gets a booty talisman, so belkar could find someone too.
That's a joke, right? Being stuck up or a little dull-witted is on a par with homicidal tendencies? Suuuuure...



like elan and haley for example.
as much as they both realize they have feelings for one another (and it would be cute for them to end up together) i just don't see it happening. it may complicate things.
I disagree--I've always thought they would end up together, and given the last few comics, it would be pretty strange if it wasn't sooner rather than later.



Actually, I take that back. At least Belkar tends to listen if given a good reason why someone doesn't need to die (on the rare occasions that someone other than Roy gives him one), whereas Miko from what we've seen won't even respect her own Lord's trust in a group of people.
Because if there's anyone whose ideas are worthy of respect, it's a senile old guy who takes orders from his cat.

...seriously now, Shojo hasn't given her a lot of reason to trust his judgment.

[dr4Kan]

Want to see something really disturbing regarding belkar and a girlfriend?

http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e320/TheStoneyOne/theending1.gif

Don't thank me for that horrible image, thank the_stoney_one (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/member.php?u=17491) as he was the one who created it quite some time ago :tongue:

My head asplode!...

On a side note...it seems someone took Craft (Disturbing Mental Image) (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0249.html)...

[Lord Magtok]

ESARS: If you all remember correctly, the meatbag known as Belkar was thought by V to only feel two emotions: lust, and rage. Maybe Ayya might enjoy his presence, but a android such as myself would never soil myself with constant association with an organic(excluding Lord Magtok.) However, I do admire his bloodlust, as it is always wonderful to see an organic who appreciates acts of gratuitous violence. And kobold-hide hats and kobold nacho bowls.

Magtok: The closest Belkar's ever come to a girlfriend was Roy, during that whole belt of masculinity/feminity. Speaking of which, I'd like to see V put on that belt. Could be interesting.

[Amon Star]

One of the greatest ironys is that although it was invented as a joke or a way to annoy Miko lovers/haters, Miko/Belkar actually makes sense.
Their both pyschos who love to kill stuff, if Miko could dislodge the stick in her ass, it could actually work.
As in its NEVER EVER EVER going to happen in this comic, but maybe if their were an alternate universe......

Belkar getting a girl would ruin his characther. Might be intresting if she were a little crazy (cause who else would get with Belkar?)

When has :miko: shown pleasure in killing? She is a Samurai that is also blessed by the gods. She does her duty. The poor girl doesn't seem to get much pleasure out of anything. :smallfrown:


That's another reason why. Haven't you heard that opposite attracts?

Yeah, but THAT extreme?


Speaking of which, I'd like to see V put on that belt. Could be interesting.

I doubt there would be any obvious change, but it would be interesting.

[Snake-Aes]

Scrubbing bubbles.

*ahem*

I don't think Belkar has what it takes to get a girlfriend, let along keep one. He's too selfish. Violent, too, but it's the selfishness that'd keep him single. He's so self-absorbed he'd never be able to actually CARE about a girl, and any girl who A) enjoyed being treated like a sex toy, or B) put up with this crap because she thought she could change him... well, that character would be the first on my God, I Hope They Get Killed Off list.

But isn't that NALE?
Woulnd't that qualify Belkar to date a FIEND? O.O'

[MReav]

ESARS: If you all remember correctly, the meatbag known as Belkar was thought ny V to only feel two emotions: lust, and rage.

Judging from his interactions with Elan, we may either be looking at some repressed homosexuality, or he's got a third setting: "Exploit".

[TreesOfDeath]

When has :miko: shown pleasure in killing? She is a Samurai that is also blessed by the gods. She does her duty. The poor girl doesn't seem to get much pleasure out of anything. :smallfrown:



She does get hardly any pleasure out of anything BUT....
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0215.html 9th panel. I guess this is debateable but thats a set up for MY TRUMP CARD
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0290.html
Second panel of part 2

[Mr.Burn]

Besides she's incredible Stupid and Intolerant, not to mention Restrained of any logical thinking.
Moste People hate Paladins cos there absolutly def to reason or logic any other than there own. All they do Is think there hear to judge the world.... ok question nr.1: Who the heck gave them teh right to do so?.
Everyone have to ajust to them or your filled with Evila nd must be put down... I call Belkar clones be placed in there spot, atleast he can make people laugh, and when in doubt you can sick him with lawenforcments.

Side not: paladins sadictically enjoy killing anything apart from all teh races aproved byt the laws that guthen them in soem way... minor but still. Exept crime doers, Which brings up anotehr thing:

The paladins dint even have the right to Judge the OotS even if it was againts the whole Land, only the aproved LAW ENFORCMENTS had any right to take them in to custedy/judgethem/sentence them.

[the_tick_rules]

well it's possible. it'd take a unique woman to do it though.

[Erek Garnsfel]

Eventually Belkar will make Miko lose her class abilities. That might dislodge the stick. We know Belkar will driver her to an absolute rage. A relationship. That's absurd.

[knownaspirate]

Magtok: The closest Belkar's ever come to a girlfriend was Roy, during that whole belt of masculinity/feminity. Speaking of which, I'd like to see V put on that belt. Could be interesting.

you know. if V put on the belt. I doubt we'd see a difference.

[knownaspirate]

Eventually Belkar will make Miko lose her class abilities. That might dislodge the stick. We know Belkar will driver her to an absolute rage. A relationship. That's absurd.


does miko have levels in barbarian?

[Mr.Burn]

Shes a Paladin/Monk Multi-class... could have som Fighetr in it, seeing Belkar mentioned she'd Turn in to a Fighetr with no Palie bonuse feets, if she killed him, but Belkar dosnt knwo 3 jakc about Classes thou (( Ranger with no Survival skills >_> )) so you can;t call him a very reliable source

[skinkatlarge]

Judging from his interactions with Elan, we may either be looking at some repressed homosexuality, or he's got a third setting: "Exploit".Eh, Belkar has said "He makes me laugh"; that's probably all the explanation we need. Though V has shown surprising interpersonal insights, that one statement disproves her Belkar theory by itself. And, hey, even hating everyone doesn't make you totally immune to Charisma.

There might be a meta-explanation in that if :belkar: picked on the innocent :elan: too much, it might make some readers really sour on :belkar:'s character. Frankly I'm glad he's not as one-dimensional as V makes him out to be.

[Dawnstrider_Moogle]

Serves: The Greater Good



Hah! Superb pun. I approve.

[Professor Tanhauser]

You know, all this talk of belkar and miko has made ye olde professor think: Maybe miko needs a good roll to improve her mood too, hmmmm?

It might not be a bad idea to get them together, somehow. Maybe it could be done in a funny way, like some "charm spells" hitting them both and the first thing they see is each other.

Heh, Belkar may be small, but I bet if he diverted his energies from killing to, uh, loving for a while he could give miko a few nice moments.

[Mr.Burn]

Belkar would probably vut out her kidneys if he go too close, and as I said erlier: shes uptight and selfcenetred: so not only Belkar would do that...

[Professor Tanhauser]

Belkar would probably vut out her kidneys if he go too close, and as I said erlier: shes uptight and selfcenetred: so not only Belkar would do that...


Sure she's uptight, she's probably never....you know, that whole paladin holy warrior thing. Maybe she needs a little something to loosen her up.

Belkar certainly counts as a little something....:smallbiggrin:

[Snake-Aes]

Shes a Paladin/Monk Multi-class... could have som Fighetr in it, seeing Belkar mentioned she'd Turn in to a Fighetr with no Palie bonuse feets, if she killed him, but Belkar dosnt knwo 3 jakc about Classes thou (( Ranger with no Survival skills >_> )) so you can;t call him a very reliable source
Without paladin exclusive class skills, they're exactly like fighters. Without the bonus feats.

Miko has no level in Fighter

[Xanthos]

Without paladin exclusive class skills, they're exactly like fighters. Without the bonus feats.

Miko has no level in Fighter

Well, not *exactly*. They have different class skills.

(Also could have sworn they had good will saves as well, but I just checked and was wrong on that count as well :smallannoyed: )

[Snake-Aes]

if you take off the fighter's bonus feats and the paladins' class features, you get the same thing: someone with d10 hit dice and 1-1 BAB

[Ayya the Fearsome]

One who is "crazy/demented/stupid." :smallbiggrin: Actually, I am more in favor of "demented."

ayya demented. ayya like belkar.

:thog: what about thog?

its com-pli-cat-ed

[The Hammer of Thor]

Want to see something really disturbing regarding belkar and a girlfriend?

http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e320/TheStoneyOne/theending1.gif

Oh.......my........god.......
That's horrible.
But what if it did happen? Miko could turn evil due to Xykon's influnences and....and....Belkar......I can't go on.

[Amon Star]

She does get hardly any pleasure out of anything BUT....
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0215.html 9th panel. I guess this is debateable but thats a set up for MY TRUMP CARD
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0290.html
Second panel of part 2

True, she did smile in the first example you gave, but that could just be the adrenalin or satisfaction for her plan working so well. Even if it was because of the killing, :roy: likes kicking evil ass just as much.

The second example could easily be :miko: being overzealous, which she definately is. We can't see her expression to truly gauge her feelings.


Besides she's incredible Stupid and Intolerant, not to mention Restrained of any logical thinking.
Moste People hate Paladins cos there absolutly def to reason or logic any other than there own. All they do Is think there hear to judge the world.... ok question nr.1: Who the heck gave them teh right to do so?.
Everyone have to ajust to them or your filled with Evila nd must be put down... I call Belkar clones be placed in there spot, atleast he can make people laugh, and when in doubt you can sick him with lawenforcments.

Side not: paladins sadictically enjoy killing anything apart from all teh races aproved byt the laws that guthen them in soem way... minor but still. Exept crime doers, Which brings up anotehr thing:

The paladins dint even have the right to Judge the OotS even if it was againts the whole Land, only the aproved LAW ENFORCMENTS had any right to take them in to custedy/judgethem/sentence them.

True, she does have a stick up her ass that's bigger than the one in most Paladins. They can rub people up the wrong way with there righteous attitude. As for who gives them the right to judge, there God(s) and/or the forces of Law & Good in general. Therefore, bringing in the OotS under a divine mandate can be considered Lawful, as the Sapphire Guard can be considered the Lawful guardians of reality.


You know, all this talk of belkar and miko has made ye olde professor think: Maybe miko needs a good roll to improve her mood too, hmmmm?

QFT.

[Shadow of the Sun]

The thought of Belkar in a gene-pool, any gene-pool, disturbs me to my core.

[FlawedParadigm]

True, she does have a stick up her ass that's bigger than the one in most Paladins.

Personally, I think she has two sticks, and they tend to rub together and start fires.

But maybe that's just me.

[Tharj TreeSmiter]

Belkar just needs another "two for one" hooker deal.

[tojo102]

Maybe Belkar does need a girlfriend... but what kind of crazy/demented/stupid girl would want belkar as a boyfriend?

Sabine's wild younger sister maybe?

[MReav]

Personally, I think she has two sticks, and they tend to rub together and start fires.

But maybe that's just me.

That's just you. Those fires are the results of the flamewars that invariably start over her.

[Professor Tanhauser]

Personally, I think she has two sticks, and they tend to rub together and start fires.

But maybe that's just me.

Hmm, let's see now, if someone had two sticks up their ass that rubbed together and started fires, and they ate enough beans...

Might be able to make a dragon green with envy.:smallbiggrin:

[Amon Star]

The thought of Belkar in a gene-pool, any gene-pool, disturbs me to my core.

That a good point. However, :belkar: and this potential girlfriend could use a protection spell. :biggrin:

[Hyrael]

Because if there's anyone whose ideas are worthy of respect, it's a senile old guy who takes orders from his cat.

...seriously now, Shojo hasn't given her a lot of reason to trust his judgment.
:miko: is a SAMURAI. that means that she follows her lord's word, without question. if he randomly tells her to kill herself, she does it then and there. he tells her to go massacer a village, she does it or probably looses her palladinhood (her personal code probably includes the samurai code). of course, if she did follow that order, she would loose her palladinhood for comitting an evil act. so, miko retaining her palladinhood relies on her self-control and her lord not screwing her with a contradictory order (what happens to a robot when you tell it to do two things that contradict eachother? Error! Error! Emergency Shutdown!.....REbooting default settings...crush, kill, destroy. Crush, kill destroy.)

[unstattedCommoner]

:miko: is a SAMURAI. that means that she follows her lord's word, without question, and without thought. If he randomly tells her to kill herself, she does it then and there. He tells her to go massacre a village, she does it or probably looses her palladinhood (her personal code probably includes the samurai code). Of course, if she did follow that order, she would loose her palladinhood for comitting an evil act. So, miko retaining her palladinhood relies on her self-control and her lord not screwing her with a contradictory order.

While both alternatives may be breaches of the paladin code of conduct, refusing to obey an obviously evil order should result in a much less onerous atonement quest than carrying out the order. In any case, Shojo's continued rule depends on his cat not appearing to issue such ridiculous orders. He's believed to be senile, yes, but also Lawful Good.

[Hyrael]

While both alternatives may be breaches of the paladin code of conduct, refusing to obey an obviously evil order should result in a much less onerous atonement quest than carrying out the order. In any case, Shojo's continued rule depends on his cat not appearing to issue such ridiculous orders. He's believed to be senile, yes, but also Lawful Good.
well, yes. Sojo wouldnt give an order like that, because he's neutral good. But, if it was some other ruler, who was evil or crazy or both, she might be in trouble. and there could be less obviously evil orders that would have the same result.

actually, come to think of it, palladins would make good lab rats for the sceintific testing of moral dilemas. just train up a bunch of 1st level palladins, give them orders to do something, and see if they fall. if they do, you have proof that it's an evil act. it would resolve the question of undead creation; just make a palladin take ranks in UMD and give them a scroll of animate dead. Palladin Lab Rats! Brilliant!

[Amon Star]

well, yes. Sojo wouldnt give an order like that, because he's neutral good. But, if it was some other ruler, who was evil or crazy or both, she might be in trouble. and there could be less obviously evil orders that would have the same result.

Shojo doesn't have complete control over his Paladins. If he did, then he wouldn't have needed the :belkar: illusion to fool them. they will except some leway with him because they think he's senile, but if he ever gives an order that they can't obey because of there code, they won't. They may even overthrough him, or at least try work out who is controlling him/have replaced him with a doppleganger. Same if he gave an order that violated the precepts of the Sapphire Guard, like destroy a Gate or spy on one of the others.

[Tornek the Unhygenic]

Want to see something really disturbing regarding belkar and a girlfriend?

http://i42.photobucket.com/albums/e320/TheStoneyOne/theending1.gif

Don't thank me for that horrible image, thank the_stoney_one (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/member.php?u=17491) as he was the one who created it quite some time ago :tongue:

OH MY GODDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Professor Tanhauser]

The thought of Belkar in a gene-pool, any gene-pool, disturbs me to my core.

In physical terms the belkster is a prime specimen, look at how many enemies he's killed. He's not stupid either, as evidenced by the way he handled yikyik even with that stupid MoJ on him limiting his abilities.

Really belkar might be good breeding stock, for halflings, it's just that you might want to kake sure the offspring were raised with a little more empathy and conscience, or at least liberal doses of "Owl's wisdom" spells....

[Warpfire]

Eh, Belkar has said "He makes me laugh"; that's probably all the explanation we need. Though V has shown surprising interpersonal insights, that one statement disproves her Belkar theory by itself. And, hey, even hating everyone doesn't make you totally immune to Charisma.

There might be a meta-explanation in that if :belkar: picked on the innocent :elan: too much, it might make some readers really sour on :belkar:'s character. Frankly I'm glad he's not as one-dimensional as V makes him out to be.

I would like to add my hearty agreement. Too many people seem to automatically assume the two setting brain theory is correct, when it could just be V overthinking things. Belkar is smarter than people give him credit for. :belkar: