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Douche
2016-04-29, 01:13 PM
As a player, if a new guy joins into your game.

He continuously asks irrelevant details and tries to be the "party leader" when his character has joined 3 days ago in-universe. Then we all hear the DM describe these irrelevant details to him, and he repeats them to us in character. Like, we're sitting right here. We heard it. You don't have to recite it word for word.

Then he tries to suggest plans and the whole party is in consensus, but it still takes like half an hour just to decide to go north to pursue some guy, because he wants to dream up these minute details. The DM just sits there and lets him go on and on and on. Then afterwards it turns out those details didn't come up

ie, "hey wizard, cast invisibility on us so we can sneak past all the guards!" *20 minute discussion on how we should scout from a distance to see if there even are any guards* *I get bored and walk up and scout on my own* whoops, no guards. Guess we dont need to cast invisibility. No getting those 20 minutes of our lives back, though (don't even get me started on his 5 minute

Basically, how do I get this guy to shut up and stop with the indecision? So far I've been doing my best to shoot down all his proposals and doing the opposite of what he says, or just being brash and proceeding without giving him a chance to stop me.

Gildedragon
2016-04-29, 01:46 PM
firstly: don't be a donkeypit, if the other players are having fun, roleplaying and the like, don't be that guy. Also turn down the anger. you're not going to get any good results being angry over people playing a game.

second: talk to them (the player and the DM) ooc and ask them if they could ease it up, as it is grinding the game to a halt; that he could just say "i inform the party" or that there's a tacit understanding he isn't withholding information. You gotta be polite and calm. I know what your name is, but don't live up to it.

3: If you can't manage to be polite/calm and change things, well it is clearly irritating you. Leave the game; it isn't for you.

neonagash
2016-04-29, 02:50 PM
Try being more brusque in character.

IE we've all seen that character in a war movie whose always all "lets get a move on we're burning daylight" or "lets get a lay of the land before we make any plans we may not need".

Just make sure its the character not being a prick, but being a professional on a timetable.

Amphetryon
2016-04-29, 02:57 PM
Basically, how do I get this guy to shut up and stop with the indecision? So far I've been doing my best to shoot down all his proposals and doing the opposite of what he says, or just being brash and proceeding without giving him a chance to stop me.

Assuming you're asking in earnest, and not making a joke:

Why do you think that shooting down his proposals and being deliberately contrary will improve his indecision? Seems to me this would only increase any Analysis Paralysis.

icefractal
2016-04-29, 03:18 PM
The repeating info - talk about it out of game. It may be he's just used to a more strictly IC game where it would be necessary. Seems pretty reasonable to just summarize it as "I tell the others that info".

As far as planning, that's trickier, because planning an elaborate schemes are what some people enjoy in the game. It's a matter of different play-styles, and from his PoV, just kicking in the door and winging it probably sounds boring. There's definitely such a thing as too much planning and/or too much second guessing, but for the most part it's subjective. The answer to this comes down to how the other players and the GM feel about it. If everyone else likes going straight to the action, tell this guy (OOC) that you'd rather play that style. If you're the only one who dislikes the planning, this campaign might not be for you.

Templarkommando
2016-04-30, 09:41 AM
Without knowing too much about your situation, you might be sensitive to any personal quirks that your new party member has. Some people - and I'm not saying that it's this guy - but some people have to repeat things in order to absorb the information. I can certainly get that this would be a bit annoying though.

The first thing that I would try after that is setting an example. As a player, I want to be respectful of everyone else's time, and I want them to be respectful of mine. If you want someone to be brief in their descriptions, try to show how awesome a brief explanation can be in-character. Try to show how you can get things done without a thirty minute debate on every minute detail. Look at your DM and say "My character does this." and if the other character tries to argue, look back at the DM and say "My character isn't going to stop and discuss this, he just does it." You can get yourself into some trouble this way, but it's a different sort of trouble than you would have listening to a monotonous decision about some minute detail.

That said, give the guy a break some times. Maybe his whole reason for playing D&D is to get into semantic arguments about what doors look like. I know a certain well-beloved author that could go on for pages talking about a freakin' door. :smallbiggrin:

Edit: One other thing. If at some point it's just not getting better, say something like: "Okay, look. I want to be gentle about this, so I'm sorry if I come off as crass. As a player I don't want to monopolize everyone's time. Your time is valuable, but I hope you understand that mine is too. We've just got done with a 15 minute in-depth discussion about what we're going to say to someone. That seems a little long. Again, I don't want to come across as mean, but I really like playing and I don't want to spend all of my time bogged down in minutia. I just want to relax and have fun and I hope you do too."

Donnadogsoth
2016-04-30, 12:24 PM
How do you politely get people to shut up?

Simple, not easy: tell your GM it's him or me. Either rein in his tiresome antics or I leave. You can be nice about it, not arch, but be forthright in private and either way you won't have to put up with the given player's nonsense anymore.

GrayDeath
2016-05-01, 10:08 AM
How do you politely get people to shut up?



By not being a douche(bag)? ^^


Less snarky: It seems to me that the problem is your impatoence and respectively incompatible playstyles, so sit down, each explain what constitutes the most fun for you, and try to find a good compromise.

DJ Yung Crunk
2016-05-01, 10:10 AM
Best thread title in history. Just wanted to say that. Carry on, gents.

Gtdead
2016-05-02, 09:07 AM
Seems like either your party lacks organization or the new player (and his character by extension) isn't aware of who is the specialist. In my party I'm the leader, but I don't get carried away with details that are not up to me. I just order the specialists to do whatever they have to do, and if they fail I decide on a more "hands on" approach. I'm guessing that you used a similar setup before the new player joined. Try to explain that to him? Either in game or not.

Your DM doesn't really have any reason to stop him unless he wants to rush a part to get to the more important bits. He gets ideas from your conversations while he takes a break in the mean time. It's a win win for him ;p .

Belac93
2016-05-02, 09:17 AM
I would say, just give him advice. If he is a new player, you can always act as the wise, knowledgeable D&D veteran. Give him tips that work in your favour.

Also, play characters who get bored easily. If he spends a long time talking, get into trouble that could inconvenience him. Make sure to check with the DM and other players before doing this, but if you can get it to a point where you say; "I walk off, bored, and look for something to do." And then he says; "Crap, [insert PC's name here] is going off a again! I follow him to make sure he doesn't get into any trouble!" Then you're golden.

Douche
2016-05-02, 01:18 PM
I would say, just give him advice. If he is a new player, you can always act as the wise, knowledgeable D&D veteran. Give him tips that work in your favour.

Also, play characters who get bored easily. If he spends a long time talking, get into trouble that could inconvenience him. Make sure to check with the DM and other players before doing this, but if you can get it to a point where you say; "I walk off, bored, and look for something to do." And then he says; "Crap, [insert PC's name here] is going off a again! I follow him to make sure he doesn't get into any trouble!" Then you're golden.

That's what I've been doing so far. Like I said, I'm playing a low int character so I have an excuse to do anything I want and just play it off as being an idiot.

Thrawn4
2016-05-02, 04:37 PM
That's what I've been doing so far. Like I said, I'm playing a low int character so I have an excuse to do anything I want and just play it off as being an idiot.

"Stealing from the other player characters and betraying them is what my thief would do. Stop telling me how to play my character."

goto124
2016-05-03, 02:36 AM
"This is now a game of Paranoia. Everyone, get Paranoid."

Douche
2016-05-03, 11:21 AM
"Stealing from the other player characters and betraying them is what my thief would do. Stop telling me how to play my character."

I see this parallel you're trying to make but you're wrong.

I have gotten the party into trouble multiple times by getting bored and attacking immediately when setting up an ambush.

Therefore, getting tired of a 2 hour long discussion on how to pick our noses is perfectly within character and has been established gradually.

Gildedragon
2016-05-03, 04:23 PM
I see this parallel you're trying to make but you're wrong.

I have gotten the party into trouble multiple times by getting bored and attacking immediately when setting up an ambush.

Therefore, getting tired of a 2 hour long discussion on how to pick our noses is perfectly within character and has been established gradually.

It is still douchey to throw a wrench into the party's planning.

GrayDeath
2016-05-03, 04:39 PM
Looks at the OP`s Nick.

Raises left Brow.

Faily
2016-05-03, 05:43 PM
Looks at the OP`s Nick.

Raises left Brow.

It did cross my mind too. :smalltongue:


In all seriousness; talk to the player. As he's the new guy, could be he's trying way too hard to show he can "carry his own load" in the group and is overly-eager with contributing.
Or the party actually is incapable of making decisions in a reasonable amount of time (considering I have a group like that, I know the feeling!).

Douche
2016-05-04, 08:51 AM
It did cross my mind too. :smalltongue:


In all seriousness; talk to the player. As he's the new guy, could be he's trying way too hard to show he can "carry his own load" in the group and is overly-eager with contributing.
Or the party actually is incapable of making decisions in a reasonable amount of time (considering I have a group like that, I know the feeling!).


Ok guys, I have taken your advice and made an effort to be nicer to the guy ooc. He's actually a cool, thoughtful person. I didn't have anything against him personally.

And you're right. It's his third session now and I think he is a little less determined to prove himself, he's been more chill. He still second guesses everything, because we had some collosal screw ups in the last 2 sessions - in town though. Now we're out of town and it's time to kill indiscriminately. We've been moving along faster now though

Earthwalker
2016-05-04, 09:54 AM
Looks at the OP`s Nick.

Raises left Brow.

Can you smell what the GreyDeath is cooking....

Douche
2016-05-05, 03:23 PM
Sorry to bump this, the topic is dead, but what is a "nick"?

Amphetryon
2016-05-05, 03:27 PM
Sorry to bump this, the topic is dead, but what is a "nick"?

Nick= nickname/screenname.

Douche
2016-05-05, 03:31 PM
Nick= nickname/screenname.

Oh, ok. Thanks. I had a feeling it was that, but I figured people would just call it a username or something. Never seen it called nickname before

Mith
2016-05-05, 05:52 PM
Pretty sure Nick is more a left over from the old chat rooms where you didn't have a permanent name on a site.

Deepbluediver
2016-05-05, 05:59 PM
Try being more brusque in character.
See, I disagree with this entirely. Being in-character is in-character, but it's not the in-character aspect (IMO) that you are upset with. Wait until AFTER a game session and try to talk to them privately. I like to RP, and I've certainly played characters that pissed off other people's CHARACTERS, but I would never want someone being upset with me out-of-game or dreading a session where I'll be present. If someone let me know that my RP was upsetting them on a personal level I'd gracious (and reasonably) try to alter my behavior so I could still have fun without stepping on other people's toes.

Also keep in mind that being "the new guy" can be very exciting for some people, and he might just be trying to prove his worth to the group. If you can do so diplomatically, perhaps suggest that if he wants to truly be a good gamer, he should watch and listen to some of the veterans and follow their lead.


"Stealing from the other player characters and betraying them is what my thief would do. Stop telling me how to play my character."
And this is why it's so important to separate out-of-character and in-character moments. Yes your thief might want to steal everything not nailed down and come back tomorrow for the nails, but as a PERSON you are upsetting other people. So unless you want a "self-righteous holier-than-though paladin who thinks that every thief needs to have his hands cut off" to suddenly show up, chill out.

Peelee
2016-05-05, 06:01 PM
Pretty sure Nick is more a left over from the old chat rooms where you didn't have a permanent name on a site.

Nick.... now that's a word I've not head in a long time. A long time.

Man, now I'm feeling old.

Mith
2016-05-05, 11:14 PM
Nick isn't from that long ago

*checks calendar. Sees that we are 6 years into the 2010s*

Never mind.

RazorChain
2016-05-05, 11:41 PM
I recommend saying "would you kindly shut up...please." You might even add pretty please or even a pretty pretty please with sugar on top!

GrayDeath
2016-05-06, 02:44 PM
Nick isn't from that long ago

*checks calendar. Sees that we are 6 years into the 2010s*

Never mind.


Well, what can Is ay, I am ancient.

Though not as ancient as good old Mr. Spcok who taught me the art of the Eyebrow.

DarthSpader
2016-05-06, 05:42 PM
This seems like a "you problem"

FocusWolf413
2016-05-07, 08:24 AM
"Shut the hell up" usually works.