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Brunks
2016-06-14, 10:31 AM
Yes, player, not character.

I'm GM-ing a game with some close friends, one of whom is terminally ill.
For now we all want to continue playing together, for as long as we can. Its a strange idea though, having a character outlive the player (never mind losing one of your best friends).

Its a sandboxy 3.5 campaign with a slowly advancing world plot, and while i would like to "finish" it. Adjusting a campaign arc to someone's expected lifespan is not something that feels right. For now my plan is to continue the campaign for however long and fade out on an "they all went on to do great things" Epilogue. Let all the PC's live on in the campaign world. It feels a little bit like a cop out, but its the best I've come up with.

Have you ever dealt with player deaths in your games? Perhaps you have some advice or suggestions for me.

Thanks.

hymer
2016-06-14, 11:00 AM
I'm sorry to hear of your friend's illness!

I had a campaign outlive one of its players a little over five years ago. It was a long illness (I think he barely missed the five year mark from diagnosis), so it came as no real surprise when he finally died. In fact, I played with him (him DMing, even) about 24-36 hours before his death. That campaign obviously died with its maker. But roleplaying was one of the things he wanted to do as much as he could towards the end, and he told us as much. We were only too happy to oblige.

My campaign, in which he was player, was a West Marches (http://arsludi.lamemage.com/index.php/78/grand-experiments-west-marches/) style game, and he wasn't the only player to leave before it was over - though none for sadder reasons. I never even contemplated doing anything to the campaign to let him finish something. There was no way to know when he was strong enough to play, and no way to know when he would die. So no planning would have been possible.

And what would we have done if we'd made it to the end of something I'd planned? Well, obviously we'd have plunged right into the next adventure while there was still time.

I wrote a short epilogue for his characters after his funeral, to the effect that they moved on to other adventures elsewhere, and we went on with our lives and our campaign. I might have brought up the whole 'what would you like to have happen with your characters after, you know...', but it seemed to me that roleplaying was better being an escape from illness, to the degree it could be. We discussed his illness in non-game social situations, but once the game was on, that's where our focus was.

AMFV
2016-06-14, 11:56 AM
Yes, player, not character.

I'm GM-ing a game with some close friends, one of whom is terminally ill.
For now we all want to continue playing together, for as long as we can. Its a strange idea though, having a character outlive the player (never mind losing one of your best friends).

Its a sandboxy 3.5 campaign with a slowly advancing world plot, and while i would like to "finish" it. Adjusting a campaign arc to someone's expected lifespan is not something that feels right. For now my plan is to continue the campaign for however long and fade out on an "they all went on to do great things" Epilogue. Let all the PC's live on in the campaign world. It feels a little bit like a cop out, but its the best I've come up with.

Have you ever dealt with player deaths in your games? Perhaps you have some advice or suggestions for me.

Thanks.

I would ask the player how he feels. This is an opportunity for him to get a lot of wish fulfillment potentially as his character may be able to live on past him, or that might be something that would make him miserable. I would probably try to see if he's interested in adjusting the campaign arc to his lifespan, or if he just wants business as usual. He'll know more about how he feels than you do, and as a friend you'll want to do the thing that is most fun for him since it's his last game.

This is also an opportunity to do all kinds of things that might not be appropriate in a regular campaign. Discuss with the other players what you can do, but you could have the friend play as the central character and the others as supporting characters if everybody is on-board. You can do all kinds of things to push the game to a close, or not depending on if closure or remembrance is what folks want. The main thing, and I mean the real main thing is not to assume that you know their wants or what they need to heal better than they do.

And then figure out what you need. I would personally probably try to keep the character around, reference him in later campaigns and such. But that's the thing that helps me the most to deal with this kind of loss. And it might be more painful for you. Talk to your players and sit down and think about. I personally, think the idea of a character outliving the player is amazing, it's a way to memorialized every single time you guys play you can think about him and that's meaningful. He'll continue to be a part of your games and lives long after he's gone. Although again, make sure everyone is on-board.

I'm also very sorry for your loss, and I hope you find the answer that works best for your group.

RazorChain
2016-06-15, 12:50 AM
Yes, player, not character.

I'm GM-ing a game with some close friends, one of whom is terminally ill.
For now we all want to continue playing together, for as long as we can. Its a strange idea though, having a character outlive the player (never mind losing one of your best friends).

Its a sandboxy 3.5 campaign with a slowly advancing world plot, and while i would like to "finish" it. Adjusting a campaign arc to someone's expected lifespan is not something that feels right. For now my plan is to continue the campaign for however long and fade out on an "they all went on to do great things" Epilogue. Let all the PC's live on in the campaign world. It feels a little bit like a cop out, but its the best I've come up with.

Have you ever dealt with player deaths in your games? Perhaps you have some advice or suggestions for me.

Thanks.

I think it is a great idea just to fade out. For many players Roleplaying is about the journey not the destination, I've rarely known that players want to wrap up a campaign that they like.

I advice that you just proceed as normal and just try to have fun, don't make him a special little snowflake in your game. I lost my father recently to leukemia and even though he was ill for a long time he didn't want any preferential treatment , in fact he just wanted things to proceed as usual.

Âmesang
2016-06-15, 01:40 PM
I'm reminded of Don Kaye (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Kaye), co-founder of TSR and creator of the character, "Murlynd," who died unexpectedly at 36 from a heart attack. He passed on some 41 years ago, but his character continues to live on.

I think if I find myself in such a situation I'd likely do the same with the player's character, leave references here and there, legends and whatnot.

No matter what, though, I hope every day together is a good day. :smallsmile:

Jay R
2016-06-15, 04:07 PM
Consider an apotheosis. Is there some quest he could fulfill or artifact he could gain that would make him become a god? (Or perhaps just a saint or angel?)

Possibly he could hold off the enemy and save the country in a heroic stand at a bridge that would be forever after known as Hisname's Bridge.

But after you get all the ideas, talk to him about it. It's not your character.

Belac93
2016-06-15, 06:41 PM
Talk to him about this. It may be awkward, but you should do what he wants. I would personally feel like a transcendence/happy retirement would be nice, but ask what he would like.

Sorry for your loss.

dps
2016-06-17, 07:47 AM
Crap. I make jokes a lot about people referring to a player dying when they mean a character (I just did it in another thread) and now I fell like a heel about it.

But yeah, talk to him and see how he'd like to handle it.