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Lortime
2017-01-21, 10:24 PM
Hello friends i love item such as Ring of detect fire Range : touch or a helmet of detect invisible but it blocks your vison or amulet of air breathing.
please list other useless item and enchantments to serve as troll item or bad enchantments.

The Glyphstone
2017-01-21, 10:27 PM
Amulet of Air Breathing sounds like a great item to use during an underwater adventure. Now, if it's cursed to shut off when it gets wet, that's more appropriate.

Maglubiyet
2017-01-21, 10:44 PM
Schrödinger's Box - summons a cat (maybe dead, maybe alive) only when the box is closed, but the cat vanishes when the box is opened.

A feather fall ring that only works underwater.

Shield of Etherealness - medium shield that turns ethereal when struck

Segev
2017-01-21, 10:58 PM
A suit of full plate which casts mage armor on its wearer, as long as it's worn. No, it isn't granting a +X enhancement bonus to armor class. It casts mage armor, granting 4 armor bonus to AC that doesn't stack with the plate. (Technically still useful vs. incorporeal touch attacks.)

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-21, 11:01 PM
Shoes of grease: cast grease of floor when worn
Orcish healing club:does 1d8 damage heals for 1d4
Reckless studded leather armor: -3 ac

Lemmy
2017-01-21, 11:22 PM
Good ol' Cloak of Invisibility that only turns itself invisible... :smallbiggrin:

NichG
2017-01-21, 11:46 PM
Wand of Remove Paralysis (Self)
Type 0 Bag of Holding: Weight multiplier x1, capacity = actual capacity of a mundane bag of the same shape and size.

Even better if you can turn it around and find ways to make them useful again.

Ring of Detect Fire (Touch) + Spectral Hand
Opaque Helmet of Detect Invisible + Scrying ("As with all divination (scrying) spells, the sensor has your full visual acuity, including any magical effects.")

Koo Rehtorb
2017-01-22, 12:10 AM
Movable rod.

Tiri
2017-01-22, 04:38 AM
Good ol' Cloak of Invisibility that only turns itself invisible... :smallbiggrin:

There's also the Cloak of Invisibility that turns you invisible, but doesn't do the same for itself.

I suppose it's not entirely useless, though. You can still scare children with it.

Frozen_Feet
2017-01-22, 05:52 AM
It still hides your face etc. identifying features, so it's much more useful than the other invisible cloak.

But on that note:

Cloak of hiding: hides everyone else from you.

hymer
2017-01-22, 06:10 AM
A magical gem that glows softly when in the presence of magic.

Tiri
2017-01-22, 06:17 AM
It still hides your face etc. identifying features, so it's much more useful than the other invisible cloak.

The other cloak isn't completely useless either. Invisible material, even if it's only fabric, has lots of applications.

GloatingSwine
2017-01-22, 06:30 AM
Amulet of Air Breathing sounds like a great item to use during an underwater adventure. Now, if it's cursed to shut off when it gets wet, that's more appropriate.

An Amulet of Air Breathing would be useful for some kind of aquatic civilisation to interact with land dwellers.

iceman10058
2017-01-22, 07:29 AM
Ring of Flying: when activated the ring flies off the finger never to be seen again.

Inevitability
2017-01-22, 07:44 AM
I can't believe no one has mentioned the +1 Ring of Extra Ring Slots yet.

Jormengand
2017-01-22, 08:08 AM
I can't believe no one has mentioned the +1 Ring of Extra Ring Slots yet.

If it helps, I was about to.

There's also the brilliant "Orb of detect slope" which, when placed freely upon a slope, roughly indicates the gradient and direction of that slope.

Or how about the "Ring of detect rings"? It turns red when there's a ring nearby.

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-22, 10:33 AM
Boots of speed:enchantment only applies to the boots
Sword of mending: casts mending on itself as a bonus action does not function when chipped or broken
Wand of detect self: detects whether the user is within 100ft of wand
Plate armor of burning: casts heat metal on armor no concentration

GloatingSwine
2017-01-22, 10:43 AM
Plate armor of burning: casts heat metal on armor no concentration

Get yourself some kind of fire resistance/immunity and play the sweatiest grappler ever...

JoshuaZ
2017-01-22, 10:49 AM
A magical gem that glows softly when in the presence of magic.

Autodetects anti-magic fields and similar areas.

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-22, 11:12 AM
Get yourself some kind of fire resistance/immunity and play the sweatiest grappler ever...

Ninjas can't catch me if I'm on fire

Inevitability
2017-01-22, 11:35 AM
Get yourself some kind of fire resistance/immunity and play the sweatiest grappler ever...

Even better: put it on an iron golem.

JNAProductions
2017-01-22, 12:14 PM
Um...

Uh...

Bow-seeking arrow?

Tiri
2017-01-22, 12:36 PM
Um...

Uh...

Bow-seeking arrow?

That could be handy in an archery battle. Attach explosives or something similarly destructive for even greater effect.

JNAProductions
2017-01-22, 12:40 PM
Except it would target the nearest bow. Yours.

TheCountAlucard
2017-01-22, 12:50 PM
Except it would target the nearest bow. Yours.Unless you're not carrying a bow. Arrows aren't exactly the easiest thing to throw, but it can be done. :smallwink:

Inevitability
2017-01-22, 12:54 PM
Unless you're not carrying a bow. Arrows aren't exactly the easiest thing to throw, but it can be done. :smallwink:

Also, Launch Item is a thing.

Celestia
2017-01-22, 01:05 PM
Cloak that turns you invisible only when no one is looking at you.
Helmet that grants darkvision but only when exposed to light.
Boots that grant tremorsense but only when you're flying.
Stone that glows when Detect Magic is cast upon it.
Ring of Sustenance that only works for constructs.
Ring that grants immunity to fire but only works for creatures with the fire subtype.
Amulet that projects an anti-magic field that can only be worn by wizards.
Belt of gender changing that only works for oozes.
A book that lets you play a fantasy game but only if you have friends.

Tiri
2017-01-22, 01:31 PM
Amulet that projects an anti-magic field that can only be worn by wizards.

This is easy to use. Just take a level of Wizard, and squeeze all the nonmagical benefits you can out of it.

hymer
2017-01-22, 01:47 PM
Autodetects anti-magic fields and similar areas.

Can also be used as paperweight or doorstop.

JBPuffin
2017-01-22, 01:49 PM
Hang on, those boots would settle whether King Slime is in fact a king or queen...I need to borrow those.

As for my own offering, a flametongue that only ignites when immersed in water. Maybe you can boil your pasta water with it?

hymer
2017-01-22, 01:50 PM
As for my own offering, a flametongue that only ignites when immersed in water. Maybe you can boil your pasta water with it?

Tea! Tea! Make tea (https://youtu.be/ZWiDNH4AvPc?t=49)! But not hotting!

Lemmy
2017-01-22, 01:52 PM
Rod of Still Magic. Almost sounds useful... Until you remember you have to physically present the rod to use it.

Blindfold of True Seeing.

Potion of Thirst-Quenching. 100% effective.

Inevitability
2017-01-22, 01:55 PM
Hang on, those boots would settle whether King Slime is in fact a king or queen...I need to borrow those.

As for my own offering, a flametongue that only ignites when immersed in water. Maybe you can boil your pasta water with it?

Water and alcohols mix in any ratio. In other words, a 50% water, 50% ethanol substance would probably still count as water (after all, it's not like the water in question has to be 100% pure to make the sword work) while being burnable.

Just use magic to levitate the liquor-sphere around your sword.

Celestia
2017-01-22, 01:56 PM
Potion of Thirst-Quenching. 100% effective.
What's the Craft (Alchemy) DC on electrolytes? :smalltongue:

Tiri
2017-01-22, 02:04 PM
Blindfold of True Seeing.

It just needs to be a very thin blindfold. Either that, or make it out of the same material used for the first Useless Cloak of Invisibility.

This (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0428.html) might be an example of such an item.

Lemmy
2017-01-22, 02:20 PM
It just needs to be a very thin blindfold. Either that, or make it out of the same material used for the first Useless Cloak of Invisibility.

This (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0428.html) might be an example of such an item.
Yeah, I suppose it might work if you have some kind of x-ray vision... So how about a LEAD Blindfold of True Seeing?

Or better yet! A Blindfold of X-Ray that only lets you see through the blindfold itself!

SethoMarkus
2017-01-22, 02:37 PM
Potion of Thirst-Quenching. 100% effective.

How does it compare to Cactus Juice? I hear that is the quenchiest!

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/52/de/52/52de5233269a0b40f165955ff701ab9a.jpg

Keltest
2017-01-22, 02:43 PM
Cloak that turns you invisible only when no one is looking at you.

This would be quite useful for letting you know whether youre being observed or not.

Lemmy
2017-01-22, 02:45 PM
This would be quite useful for letting you know whether youre being observed or not.
The catch here is that you can see yourself while you're invisible. :smallbiggrin:

SethoMarkus
2017-01-22, 02:58 PM
Ion Stone of Invisibility: Only works on the stone itself.

Wand of Leomand's Tiny Hut: works like a Wand of Leomund's Tiny Hut but sized for Tiny creatures. Note: wand itself is sized for Medium creatures.

Boots of Crying and Singing: while walking, the left boot cries, the right boot sings.

Cloak of Elven-Kind: a fancy cloak that shouts Elven compliments at passerby.

Cloak of Elven-Mean: a fancy cloak that shouts Elven insults at passerby.

Tome of Remembrance: reading this ancient book reminds you of that time you embarrassed yourself in front of the whole class in third grade.

hymer
2017-01-22, 03:02 PM
Flyswatter of Disease: Any ordinary housefly struck squarely by this weapon must save vs. death or contract a noncommunicable version of the fly sniffles.

GreatKaiserNui
2017-01-22, 04:34 PM
Stack of many things: No cards, just a pile of many things.

Squiddish
2017-01-22, 05:01 PM
Duck of many things: a deck of many things, polymorphed into a duck. Rendered unusable by the fact that you are no longer able to draw cards from it.

Ring of three washes: has three charges, each of which can be used to make a wish. Wishes will inevitably be misinterpreted, corrupted, or outright ignored so that they end up cleaning something instead of the original function.

Sovereign glue (bottle untreated): this magical glue can form a permanent adhesive bond between two objects, in this case the cap and the bottle because someone forgot to coat the inside of the bottle with oil of slipperiness.

Ravens_cry
2017-01-22, 05:16 PM
Duck of many things: a deck of many things, polymorphed into a duck. Rendered unusable by the fact that you are no longer able to draw cards from it.
Dinner!


Ring of three washes: has three charges, each of which can be used to make a wish. Wishes will inevitably be misinterpreted, corrupted, or outright ignored so that they end up cleaning something instead of the original function.

Sell it to some sucker and buy something else.


Sovereign glue (bottle untreated): this magical glue can form a permanent adhesive bond between two objects, in this case the cap and the bottle because someone forgot to coat the inside of the bottle with oil of slipperiness.
Obviously glass cutters or rocks do not exist in your universe.

Squiddish
2017-01-22, 05:55 PM
Obviously glass cutters or rocks do not exist in your universe.

Oh, they do, but RAW (as of fifth edition) the glue doesn't need to be exposed to air to set, just touching an untreated solid surface. So sovereign glue in an untreated bottle is really just a bottle-shaped mass of nearly indestructible material.

DuctTapeKatar
2017-01-22, 07:34 PM
Self-Igniting Staff: This rare item is made from Sapphire Oak, a rare kind of wood valued by all for its beautiful blue hue and its use in the greatest of wands and staves. Upon casting, this staff lights itself aflame, burning down into ash within minutes.

50-Ton Boulder of Carrying: Increases carrying capacity by 49 tons!

Glove of Lubrication: Lubricates everything it touches with a warm, slippery substance. Perfect for slapping one's foes. Better remove them before the duel, though.

Potion of Thirst: The drinker gets thirstier.

Blade of Stitches: Any cut and slice the edge of this blade touches is stitched together with a fine wire, mending the wounds that would have easily have killed the person that you swung it at.

Caltrop of Speed: Any who touch these caltrops gain immense speed and agility, allowing themselves the ability to move their feet away from the points of the caltrop before the spell wears off.

Self-tying/untying shoes: Whenever the shoe is worn, it begins to untie itself. Whenever the shoe isn't worn, it ties itself in a perfect knot- not even the keenest of fingers can untie it!

Worst-case scenario Dice: These dice show the numbers that would be the worst for you to get in any situation- be it gambling or just a board game with friends.

Bottle of Sucking: Putting the mouth of this bottle up to any fluid will suck up the liquids until it is full. Won't ever let the liquid out ever again.

Very Conspicuous Box This fancy box shifts and shapes to be perfect for anyone hiding under it. Is made from pure gold, inlaid with the shiniest of silvers, and bejeweled with the finest of gems- it practically glows.

That One Book That You Really Shouldn't Own This tome is... Not meant for children. It is quite disgusting, actually. I mean, wow, this is some messed up stuff. I mean... Tentacles? That's pretty gross man, you have problems. The worst part is that it teleports right out into the open, allowing its contents easily and readily available to anyone who passes by. And, oh look, it has your name written in it.

TheTeaMustFlow
2017-01-22, 08:04 PM
Bottle of Sucking: Putting the mouth of this bottle up to any fluid will suck up the liquids until it is full. Won't ever let the liquid out ever again.

That'll teach those Sea Elves.

GorinichSerpant
2017-01-22, 10:37 PM
Boots of Crying and Singing: while walking, the left boot cries, the right boot sings.
I'd probably include this item somewhere, it has a cool folkloric quality to it. It would be very thematic on the feet of some wacky fey character.


Cloak of Elven-Mean: a fancy cloak that shouts Elven insults at passerby.

Speak for yourself, this seems like an excellent convenience item for the busy snooty high elf.



Glove of Lubrication: Lubricates everything it touches with a warm, slippery substance. Perfect for slapping one's foes. Better remove them before the duel, though.

This seems like something the proud owner of That One Book would appreciate.




Blade of Stitches: Any cut and slice the edge of this blade touches is stitched together with a fine wire, mending the wounds that would have easily have killed the person that you swung it at.

Sounds like it could handy if there's a bizarre fashion trend for looking like frankenstein's monster but you don't want to replace your arm with someone else's.




Caltrop of Speed: Any who touch these caltrops gain immense speed and agility, allowing themselves the ability to move their feet away from the points of the caltrop before the spell wears off.

If they are one time use then they could give a speed boost that leaves behind an obstacle.




Self-tying/untying shoes: Whenever the shoe is worn, it begins to untie itself. Whenever the shoe isn't worn, it ties itself in a perfect knot- not even the keenest of fingers can untie it!

Pranks!

Lord Raziere
2017-01-22, 11:32 PM
Worst-case scenario Dice: These dice show the numbers that would be the worst for you to get in any situation- be it gambling or just a board game with friends.


Give it your enemies that like to gamble.

Staff of Poisonous Immortality:
Grants you immortality three days after casting, but only if you ingest a poison that kills you within two days or less at the same time.

Horn of Silence:
You are silenced when speaking into this Horn.

Bag Of Sharing:
Looks like a bag of holding. What it really does is that it teleports your items away as they're put in and replaces it with another random item from somewhere else in the world or highly varying value and usage. The items do not switch places, rather the random places where the first item is teleported to and the item you get are completely different randomly determined places.
.

Coventry
2017-01-23, 12:03 AM
Orcish healing club:does 1d8 damage heals for 1d4

This is actually useful if the person wielding it has a STR score of 5 or lower, or if the recipient has DR 3/- (mid-level orc barbarians, for example). At that point, the math says the average healing is 5/8 of a point per use. The occasional critical hit will slightly reduce that number.

Celestia
2017-01-23, 01:05 AM
Staff of Poisonous Immortality:
Grants you immortality three days after casting, but only if you ingest a poison that kills you within two days or less at the same time.
Works best with a Neutralize Poison spell.

pwykersotz
2017-01-23, 02:27 AM
A book that lets you play a fantasy game but only if you have friends.

This made me laugh the hardest. :smallbiggrin:

sktarq
2017-01-23, 03:09 AM
Wand of Leomand's Tiny Hut: works like a Wand of Leomund's Tiny Hut but sized for Tiny creatures. Note: wand itself is sized for Medium creatures.

AKA the wand of familiar-house - perfect for your wizard's ferret

Belt of Gender Confirmation. Creates a constant series of suggestion spells to encourage one to act in a gender sterotypically way based on the wearer's culture and gender identity. Requires enchant object, telepathy, wizard's mouth

Heavy Boots. Provides a climb speed of 1, and gives one a bonus to resist bull rush actions as if two size categories larger. Also cuts normal movement to 5 (if original speed 30 or under, or 10 if over 30). Doubles encumbrance a wearer feels. . . requires to be worn for 24 hours before wall climbing and bull rush effects work as the wearer learns how to use the effects.

eru001
2017-01-23, 11:27 AM
Cannon of canon: Regardless of what projectile it is loaded with, launches a randomly determined holy book at the enemy.

GuzWaatensen
2017-01-23, 01:10 PM
50-Ton Boulder of Carrying: Increases carrying capacity by 49 tons!

So basically, somehow get a carrying capacity of 1 ton and always have a 50 ton bolder with you. It might be the only thing you carry, but I assume to people that you hit with it its still a 50 ton boulder.


Worst-case scenario Dice: These dice show the numbers that would be the worst for you to get in any situation- be it gambling or just a board game with friends.

That might be useful for divination, you might not know what result will be good or bad for you, but the dice does.

Douglas
2017-01-23, 01:17 PM
In Dungeons and Dragons Online, I once saw an item of Water Breathing (Race Restricted: Warforged only).

It was technically useful, but only by using Use Magic Device to bypass the restriction.

Segev
2017-01-23, 01:40 PM
Hat of Disguise Elf: Causes the wearer to never see elves. Any elves he sees are affected, to his eyes, as if by disguise self such that they appear to be another race (usually human).

Celestia
2017-01-23, 01:49 PM
Hat of Disguise Elf: Causes the wearer to never see elves. Any elves he sees are affected, to his eyes, as if by disguise self such that they appear to be another race (usually human).
Are half-elves half disguised as other races? :smalltongue:

Segev
2017-01-23, 02:17 PM
Are half-elves half disguised as other races? :smalltongue:

Only the half facing the wearer.

SethoMarkus
2017-01-23, 02:43 PM
Are half-elves half disguised as other races? :smalltongue:


Only the half facing the wearer.

I am now picturing Two-Face but one half Elf and the other half Orc.

eru001
2017-01-23, 02:59 PM
Rod of Wander

Causes user to wander aimlessly when traveling.


Map of other places

An enchanted map which always shows an accurate depiction of a random area where the user is not.

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-23, 03:56 PM
Rod of Wander

Causes user to wander aimlessly when traveling.


Map of other places

An enchanted map which always shows an accurate depiction of a random area where the user is not.
Are some of the places also fictional because that could really make it better especially if the maps are from previous campaigns

SomeNerd
2017-01-23, 04:37 PM
Guillotine of Healing - When used to behead someone, this Guillotine heals them for 8d8.

Decanter of Endless Emptiness - When opened, this decanter can dispense an endless amount of nothing. Putting anything else into the decanter suppresses the enchantment.

Pillow of Awareness - While resting your head on this pillow, you get a +10 bonus to all spot and listen checks. You may not voluntarily fail these checks.

Everythingbane Longsword - The blade of this sword can cut through any material like butter. Including it's own hilt. It's probably somewhere in the planet's core by now.

Flute of the Musician - When used, permanently grants the user a +10 divine bonus to all perform(flute) checks. DC 200 perform(flute) check to activate.

TheTeaMustFlow
2017-01-23, 05:18 PM
Hat of Disguise Elf: Causes the wearer to never see elves. Any elves he sees are affected, to his eyes, as if by disguise self such that they appear to be another race (usually human).

Brilliant - we just trick the humans into wearing them, and our Elven Ninja Legions will be unstoppable!

GreatKaiserNui
2017-01-23, 05:30 PM
Baneswordbane Sword: Most effective against itself.
Weilderbane Sword: Please do not use.

GloatingSwine
2017-01-23, 06:56 PM
Bag Of Sharing:
Looks like a bag of holding. What it really does is that it teleports your items away as they're put in and replaces it with another random item from somewhere else in the world or highly varying value and usage. The items do not switch places, rather the random places where the first item is teleported to and the item you get are completely different randomly determined places.

A true Bag of Sharing would be a bag, akin to a bag of holding, where all such bags have the same contents at all times. If you put an item into the Bag of Sharing, anyone else with a Bag of Sharing can remove it.

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-23, 07:15 PM
A true Bag of Sharing would be a bag, akin to a bag of holding, where all such bags have the same contents at all times. If you put an item into the Bag of Sharing, anyone else with a Bag of Sharing can remove it. what if you put your hand in when another person is acessing it

Rockphed
2017-01-23, 07:28 PM
what if you put your hand in when another person is accessing it

Then you can hold hands from across the universe.

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-23, 08:04 PM
Then you can hold hands from across the universe.

oooh great idea
Wand of mage hand(wondrous item, uncommon):
at will: casts mage hand then uses it to hold your hand

GorinichSerpant
2017-01-23, 08:24 PM
oooh great idea
Wand of mage hand(wondrous item, uncommon):
at will: casts mage hand then uses it to hold your hand

If you're fortunate it's feel like the warm hand of flesh and blood human not some cold ethereal weird stuff.

The Glyphstone
2017-01-23, 08:26 PM
or

Mage Hand's Token

This magical token, when activated, conjures a mage hand at your location. The nearest mage to your location at the time of activation can sense the direction and approximate distance of their missing hand (assuming they can staunch the bleeding stump in time).

Keltest
2017-01-23, 08:41 PM
or

Mage Hand's Token

This magical token, when activated, conjures a mage hand at your location. The nearest mage to your location at the time of activation can sense the direction and approximate distance of their missing hand (assuming they can staunch the bleeding stump in time).

Now see, if you don't have a mage in your party, that could be an effective weapon. Spontaneous dismemberment of the enemy mage? yes please.

Tiri
2017-01-23, 09:08 PM
Decanter of Endless Emptiness - When opened, this decanter can dispense an endless amount of nothing. Putting anything else into the decanter suppresses the enchantment.

That's not useless. Just use it like a normal decanter.


Pillow of Awareness - While resting your head on this pillow, you get a +10 bonus to all spot and listen checks. You may not voluntarily fail these checks.

Tie it to your head while on watch.

Aeson
2017-01-23, 09:43 PM
That's not useless. Just use it like a normal decanter.
It's true that the decanter isn't useless, but the thread title is "ironically useless enchantments," and I daresay that an enchantment for a decanter which causes the decanter to be empty and spill forth nothing while the decanter has nothing in it is in fact a useless enchantment.


Tie it to your head while on watch.
While you could perhaps debate this, I really don't think that resting your head on a pillow and having the pillow tied to your head are the same thing.

It'd be more useful as a tool for depriving someone of sleep, either as a practical joke or a form of torture - sorry, "enhanced interrogation."

Fable Wright
2017-01-23, 10:30 PM
Murlynd's Chopsticks: When placed in an empty container, the vessel fills with a thin, watery gruel. This gruel disappears upon reaching the lips unless ingested with the chopsticks.

Ring of Counterspells: Only counters the spell the wearer casts.

Manual of Golems: Describes every golem ever created. Never implies a hint of how to make them.

Potion of Poisons: Replaces one poison effect the drinker is experiencing with a different poison effect.

Grimjudgment
2017-01-23, 11:08 PM
The bell of invisibility:
As long as the user rings the bell continuously, the user is invisible

Hat of hatting:
Whenever you don the hat, it turns into a random hat

Feather of feather falling:
This feather is enchanted to fall at the speed of a feather

Circlet of average intelligence:
Gain an intelligence score equal to your race's average

Book of knowledge:
After reading the book, you gain the information that the book contains

Swall's gay apparel:
When you wear this jester's outfit, people are charmed to believe that you might be wearing a jester's outfit.

Mask of faces:
When you wear this mask, it perfectly morphs into a perfect replica of the wearer's face

Winter coat of cooling:
When you wear this heavy coat made for winter, you begin to freeze

So, that's all I have for now.

JNAProductions
2017-01-23, 11:26 PM
Bell of invisibility+permanenced silence spell=win.

Circlet of average intelligence on a stupid ally/smart enemy.

Book of knowledge on a normally bad reader. :P

Mai
2017-01-24, 12:15 AM
Arrow of returning: When shot, launched, or thrown, this arrow automatically tracks and returns to the use at the same speed it was shot/thrown/etc.

Earplugs of Listening: While being worn, the user is deaf. +10 on listen checks.

Boat of flawless swimming: While inside the boat, gain +20 to swimming checks. Ends upon leaving the boat, or the boat capsizing or sinking.

Hempen rope of lubrication: While using this rope, all people holding it must make a dexterity save (DC 20). Should they fail, the rope slips out of their hands. Dexterity save required every round.

Userbane Greatsword: Every round the user must make a consitution save (DC15) or take 2d8 points of damage. Successful saves result in only half the damage.

Boots of theif's bane: While wearing every stealth, hide, or move silently check has a -10 As the boots thunk loudly against any surface.

Lawfull Thieves Tools: All checks and skills using these take a -15 penalty if the action involves any sort of crime.

Ravens_cry
2017-01-24, 12:26 AM
Userbane Greatsword: Every round the user must make a consitution save (DC15) or take 2d8 points of damage. Successful saves result in only half the damage.

I am sure there is some way to take advantage of taking damage.

Aeson
2017-01-24, 12:54 AM
Bell of invisibility+permanenced silence spell=win.
Not if the effect only works on things which can hear the bell. Which, granted, was not part of the original description, but is perfectly in line with the intent.

OracleofWuffing
2017-01-24, 12:58 AM
Staff of Quarterstaff: When used, this magical staff becomes a nonmagical quarterstaff. As the quarterstaff is nonmagical, it cannot transform back into a magical staff.

Book of Temporary Literacy: Anyone capable of reading common language can read this book, which grants the reader a full understanding of how to read text in common language for 5 minutes.

Celestia
2017-01-24, 01:21 AM
Mask of faces:
When you wear this mask, it perfectly morphs into a perfect replica of the wearer's face.
That could be useful if you're trying to pull something on someone with a high enough spot check to notice that it's a mask. Then they'll realise that someone is trying to frame you because who in the world would try stealing something while wearing a mask of their own face? It'd be a great double bluff.

Inevitability
2017-01-24, 01:50 AM
Guillotine of Healing - When used to behead someone, this Guillotine heals them for 8d8.

Well, it's not like magical healing causes heads to grow back, does it?

Fable Wright
2017-01-24, 03:50 AM
Well, it's not like magical healing causes heads to grow back, does it?

No, but my Dullahan would love to have one of those on hand. And most of my undead characters, really, as it's untyped healing, and who really needs their skulls after the end?

Fiery Diamond
2017-01-24, 05:45 AM
Cloak that turns you invisible only when no one is looking at you.
Helmet that grants darkvision but only when exposed to light.
Boots that grant tremorsense but only when you're flying.
Stone that glows when Detect Magic is cast upon it.
Ring of Sustenance that only works for constructs.
Ring that grants immunity to fire but only works for creatures with the fire subtype.
Amulet that projects an anti-magic field that can only be worn by wizards.
Belt of gender changing that only works for oozes.
A book that lets you play a fantasy game but only if you have friends.

1. Depends on how you define "looking at you." If scrying doesn't count as looking, this could be useful. Even if not, any kind of trap or item triggered by visual detection could be beaten with it; very situational.

2. Stealth usage. Cast light on something and attach it to the side of the helmet, completely covering the something on the other side such that the light doesn't leak out.

3. Not useless - "flying" just means you have flight engaged somehow; keep one foot on the floor as you drift along, or touch the wall with your hand as you glide by, etc.

4. Detect Magic isn't cast on things, so this one doesn't make sense. An item that registers as magical to the spell and that's all it does, on the other hand, could be quite useful to trick someone, however. If it actually visibly glows to others who aren't using the spell whenever someone who is looks at it, though, that has actual practical applications - for detection of spellcasters, for one.

5. Uh... I got nothing.

6. Hm... nope.

7. As someone else said, multi-class characters could use this.

8. Um... how would that even... I mean... *brain breaks*

9. Ouch.

eru001
2017-01-24, 07:54 AM
Hempen rope of lubrication: While using this rope, all people holding it must make a dexterity save (DC 20). Should they fail, the rope slips out of their hands. Dexterity save required every round.



Very useful for a simple booby trap. Entrance to your hideout includes long drop? Have this rope run from the top to bottom. You use featherfall to get down, but most rogues will assume that climbing the rope is the correct method. Their impacting the stone of the entranceway indicates you have a burgler.

Segev
2017-01-24, 09:29 AM
Pillow of Awareness - While resting your head on this pillow, you get a +10 bonus to all spot and listen checks. You may not voluntarily fail these checks.
Tie it to your head while on watch.No, no. Just use it WHILE on watch. You can lay comfortably and be assured that falling asleep will be nearly impossible AND that you are much better at your job. Even with a -2 circumstance penalty for laying down, you have a net +8 over your usual scores for keeping an eye out.


Brilliant - we just trick the humans into wearing them, and our Elven Ninja Legions will be unstoppable!
Pff. I've never seen an elven ninja. Clearly they do not exist.

Rainbownaga
2017-01-25, 05:04 AM
Cloak that turns you invisible only when no one is looking at you.


I could totally see this as being the contrived solution to a mirror of opposition trap.

(Also a Mystery Men reference?)

eru001
2017-01-25, 08:14 AM
Pole of Vault Vaulting

A standard pole vaulting pole, which only works inside bank vaults

GloatingSwine
2017-01-25, 09:30 AM
That's not useless. Just use it like a normal decanter.

Until you die from trying to breathe hard vacuum from all the emptiness it's dispensing.

Beleriphon
2017-01-25, 12:31 PM
Until you die from trying to breathe hard vacuum from all the emptiness it's dispensing.

VACUUM DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!
https://cdn.meme.am/cache/instances/folder976/500x/75028976.jpg

Mark Hall
2017-01-25, 01:56 PM
Athasian Razor of Dwarf Grooming.

Max_Killjoy
2017-01-25, 02:06 PM
A magical gem that glows softly when in the presence of magic.

Most people I've played with would call this a useful tool, just not for detecting magic.

Jormengand
2017-01-25, 04:56 PM
Most people I've played with would call this a useful tool, just not for detecting magic.

Apart from the obvious, it would be useful for detecting antimagic fields.

Mai
2017-01-25, 05:16 PM
Invisible blindfold of blindsight: Gives the user blindsight 120ft when they are unable to see through the blindfold. (Doesn't work if the blindfold is somehow covered in any way.)

Heavy amor of invincibility: Gives the user total damage immunity as long as they cannot move in any way.

Stone of Animal-Speak: Anyone who has ever touched this stone can speak to animals of any kind, but can never speak common, gnomish, dwarven, elven, or any other landguage other than animal speak.

Hempen Roof of Adhesion: anything that touches this rope is permanently stuck to it.

Jormengand
2017-01-25, 05:30 PM
Invisible blindfold of blindsight: Gives the user blindsight 120ft when they are unable to see through the blindfold. (Doesn't work if the blindfold is somehow covered in any way.)

Heavy amor of invincibility: Gives the user total damage immunity as long as they cannot move in any way.

Stone of Animal-Speak: Anyone who has ever touched this stone can speak to animals of any kind, but can never speak common, gnomish, dwarven, elven, or any other landguage other than animal speak.

Hempen Roof of Adhesion: anything that touches this rope is permanently stuck to it.

Powerful item for blind people, powerful item for helpless psions, powerful cursed item, exceptionally dangerous item which is both a roof and a rope. What am I missing? :smalltongue:

Max_Killjoy
2017-01-25, 05:48 PM
A magical gem that glows softly when in the presence of magic.


Most people I've played with would call this a useful tool, just not for detecting magic.


Apart from the obvious, it would be useful for detecting antimagic fields.

I just thought of something.

If spells of the "detect magic" variety aren't set up by default to not detect themselves, then they might just be useless whether enchanted into a gem or just cast normally.

:confused:

Mai
2017-01-25, 06:05 PM
Powerful item for blind people, powerful item for helpless psions, powerful cursed item, exceptionally dangerous item which is both a roof and a rope. What am I missing? :smalltongue:

Nothing. I was just thinking of items that fit the title. Ironically useless enchantment. You use a blindfold on someone that can see usually, hence that irony.

What good is armor if you can't move, use materials, or any physical components such as gestures, and most certainly can't phyiscaly attack things. Yeah it gives protection, but ironically takes all offense away. (Perhaps excluding psions yes... But when the battles done you still can't move... No real hope of future battles when your stick there forever.

And if someone falls of a cliff or something yes the rope will hold them, but now the thrower and rescue-e are now stuck as asuredly the rope touched the cliff in the process.

Sure they have used. But their ironic, which is what I was go i my for.

Alcore
2017-01-25, 06:16 PM
I am sure there is some way to take advantage of taking damage.

Oh there is. In the book of vile darkness is a spell that turns the target into a Masochist. Without the book at hand I don't remember too much more of the spell beyond: lose 50HP (not necessarily at one time) gain +1 attack (damage too?).

Now you just need someone/thing to heal you....


Original item/post;
Userbane Greatsword: Every round the user must make a consitution save (DC15) or take 2d8 points of damage. Successful saves result in only half the damage.

GloatingSwine
2017-01-25, 06:26 PM
VACUUM DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!
https://cdn.meme.am/cache/instances/folder976/500x/75028976.jpg

No, but magical emptiness does :P

Keltest
2017-01-25, 06:39 PM
No, but magical emptiness does :P

as does suffocation, for that matter. It really doesn't matter what you replace the air with, trying to breathe not-air will generally lead to badness.

Jormengand
2017-01-25, 07:24 PM
I just thought of something.

If spells of the "detect magic" variety aren't set up by default to not detect themselves, then they might just be useless whether enchanted into a gem or just cast normally.

:confused:

In 3.5, the first round of Detect Magic is useless, but subsequent rounds aren't. In 5e, detect magic is severely hampered but still meaningful.

Deophaun
2017-01-25, 07:28 PM
Book of Infinite Numbers: Contains all the numbers.
Chad Lute: Lute that plays only Nickleback songs.
Chair of Speed: While sitting in the chair, your base land speed doubles; this increase does not affect other movement modes (even those based on your land speed).
Decanter of Endless Decanting: Liquid poured out of the decanter appears back inside the instant it leaves.
Pendent of Gravity Detection: Enchanted to pull towards the direction of gravity.
Rod of Wonder: Activating the rod causes everyone who can see the user and fails a DC 19 Will save to wonder what the rod did.
Silent Drums: As it says on the tin. Not an area effect.

Lord Raziere
2017-01-25, 07:29 PM
Sword of DragonsLaying:
When use to try and kill a dragon, instead automatically permanently creates a baby dragon right next to them of the same species.

Deophaun
2017-01-25, 07:32 PM
Sword of DragonsLaying:
When use to try and kill a dragon, instead automatically permanently creates a baby dragon right next to them of the same species.
Wait, I can get as many baby dragons as I want? Sold!

Lord Raziere
2017-01-25, 07:34 PM
Wait, I can get as many baby dragons as I want? Sold!

Only if you think you can control them, on top of trying to kill another dragon that this sword is guaranteed to fail to kill.

Deophaun
2017-01-25, 07:45 PM
Only if you think you can control them
At the very least, I can start a restaurant chain specializing in dragonsteaks. Beyond that, many an evil plot has started with brainwashed/mind-controlled/corrupted dragon hatchlings.

And I don't care if the sword is guaranteed to fail to kill the dragon; it's not like it's going to be able to do anything with 0 Dex.

bulbaquil
2017-01-25, 08:08 PM
Lenses of Light Detection: When putting on these lenses, the wearer is able to see sources of light, and only sources of light.
Boots of Terrain Simulation: The interior soles of these boots mimic the texture, temperature, and physical properties (including obstacles) of the terrain the exterior soles are in contact with.
Ruler/Scale/Thermometer/Barometer/etc. of Confusing Units: The units of measurement on this ruler, scale, thermometer, barometer, etc. are always in ones you don't use.
Perpetual Motion Machine: This machine continually submits pointless motions to any committee within a 10-mile radius.

Mai
2017-01-25, 08:58 PM
Perpetual motion machine huh.... Wait...

So that's why congress never gets anything done! Someone buried one of those under their meeting location!

DuctTapeKatar
2017-01-25, 10:04 PM
Spear of Un-penetration: This longspear's shaft shifts around anything you thrust it at. Swinging it at anything will result in it bending away from the target.

Incorporeal Peg-leg: This peg-leg was used by a ghost pirate, and any attempt to stand on it will only cause it to go through the floor. Useful for kicking ghosts, though.

Couch of Hyperactivity: Anyone sitting down on this couch will suddenly gain the need of running in circles for at least one mile. Does not magically generate energy for them to use while running.

Self-peeling Banana: This banana fruit slips right out of its peel as soon as there is an opening in the peel, crushing itself to escape its yellow, leathery cage.

Silvered Telescope: Anyone looking through the lens will see whatever is looking through the lens.

Vibrating Rod: Whenever this rod is shaken, it shakes once more.

Endlessly Vibrating Rod: Whenever this rod is shaken, it will continue shaking.

Increasing-resonance Vibrating Rod: Whenever this rod is shaken, it will slowly begin to shake faster and faster until the shaking tears itself apart and/or until it shakes fast enough to reach the natural resonance of the environment around it.

JNAProductions
2017-01-25, 10:28 PM
Vibrating Rod: Whenever this rod is shaken, it shakes once more.

Endlessly Vibrating Rod: Whenever this rod is shaken, it will continue shaking.

Increasing-resonance Vibrating Rod: Whenever this rod is shaken, it will slowly begin to shake faster and faster until the shaking tears itself apart and/or until it shakes fast enough to reach the natural resonance of the environment around it.

"Useless". My single characters say otherwise. :P

Celestia
2017-01-25, 10:52 PM
"Useless". My single characters say otherwise. :P
"Halt, adventures! Before you meet the king we must inspect your bags!"
"Um, I'd rather you not."
"...Why is your bag vibrating?"

GorinichSerpant
2017-01-26, 12:16 AM
"Halt, adventures! Before you meet the king we must inspect your bags!"
"Um, I'd rather you not."
"...Why is your bag vibrating?"

"Ur... don't meddle in the affairs of wizards!"

Fable Wright
2017-01-26, 03:27 AM
Heavy amor of invincibility: Gives the user total damage immunity as long as they cannot move in any way.

I do so love things like this. Stack all the debuffing wards and contingencies on your meatbag of choice, and fire them at the enemy! Psions to use their powers to chuck their invincible form at people! Also useful for any SLA/Su ability-based character like Dragonfire Adept; move them around in a wheelbarrow, and let them do work without fear.


Chair of Speed: While sitting in the chair, your base land speed doubles; this increase does not affect other movement modes (even those based on your land speed).

Stick some wheels on it. Best rolling chair EVER, or a very, very handy wheelchair.


Lenses of Light Detection: When putting on these lenses, the wearer is able to see sources of light, and only sources of light.
Boots of Terrain Simulation: The interior soles of these boots mimic the texture, temperature, and physical properties (including obstacles) of the terrain the exterior soles are in contact with.

So, for the first, you mean that my fighter will be immune to petrifying gazes, and still be able to see the Faerie Fire outlining the medusa? And the latter lets my halfling wear boots to be polite in public without cutting off his senses? Sold.


Self-peeling Banana: This banana fruit slips right out of its peel as soon as there is an opening in the peel, crushing itself to escape its yellow, leathery cage.

Self-squashing bananas for banana bread is always appreciated.

Mutazoia
2017-01-26, 03:58 AM
A ring of spell turning. When activated, a loud, clear voice says "Turning: Tee You ARE En Eye En Gee. Turning."

Helm of Invisibility. This helm is completely invisible, even when worn (the wearer is unaffected).

Boots of walking: Allows the wearer to walk at normal speed for his size/race over unobstructed terrain. While worn, the wearer cannot move faster or slower than, their normal walking speed.

Ion stone: The size of an actual ion. When activated, it orbits the users head and makes him feel generally positive about himself.

Shield of reflection. Held, the user begins to reflect on his past deed/misdeeds.

Robe of useless things. Once per turn, the wearer can reach into a pocket and pull out a random piece of crap that is no help in any situation (such as a still moist, used kleenex, a wadded piece of parchment with the punchline to a joke, but not the joke itself. Instructions for making mud, etc)

Flute of Insertion. This one time, at bard camp.....

Hat of head protection. When worn, protects the wearer's head from sun/wind/rain.

Glasses of obscured vision. This are definitely NOT your prescription.

Coin of flipping. When flipped, lands on either heads (50% chance) or Tails (50% chance). Unlimited uses per day.

Whip of cream. One flick will cover any surface with cool whip.

Lying Carpet. It is impossible for anyone standing on it to tell the truth.

Folding Goat. A successful DC 30 strength check allows you to fold this goat in half. Can only be used once.

Gem of Seething. Just holding this thing REALLY pisses you off.

Bow of Surprise. Fires small, brightly colored bows that adhere to the target, giving it a more festive appearance. Great for birthday parties and Christmas.

Sovereign Glue. Can only be used to glue Sovereigns (Kings and Queens) to each other.

Rod of One Million, Six-hundred and Eighty-two thousand, Nine-hundred and Eleven parts. Each part by itself is useless. When fully assembled, the rod immediately breaks down into its component parts, which scatter themselves across the planet. Good for wasting time.

Gauntlets of Ogre Stench. Upon donning these gauntlets, one immediately begins to smell like an overweight ogre that was forced to climb a very large flight of stairs, in the hot sun. Effect permanent, persisting even if the gauntlets are removed.

Feather of falling. When held aloft and released, this magical item will float gently to the ground, taking no damage. Does not work when in contact with any living (or dead, or undead) creature or construct.

Slug Thrower: A hand crossbow that launches an ordinary, every day, garden variety slug at the target. Does no damage, but eww gross dude!

Bulls-eye arrow: When fired, automatically his any nearby bull right in the eye (automatic critical hit). Will miss any other target automatically (it wouldn't hit the ground if you dropped it).

Cat-o-nine-tales: This large cat statue speaks non-stop, telling the same (extremely boring) nine stories over, and over, and over, and over and over....

Mirror of Scurrying. This very ornate hand mirror is always just out of reach. Functions as a hand mirror when activated.

Bohzoe's Brass Horn: When sounded, summons 1D4 clowns

Earring of ringing: When worn, emits a faint, high-pitch ringing noise in the wearers ears.

Bowl of controlling Milk Elementals: Nobodys managed to find the elemental plane of milk yet, but when they do, you are ready.

Flaming Sword: Functions as a +1 sword, and looks FABULOUS!

Armor of Displacement: When worn, has a 50% chance to teleport itself (and only itself) 5' in a random direction to avoid the blow.

Armor of Misplacement: This ornate suit of armor...wait...where is it...I was sure I had it here a second ago....

Quiver of quivering: Constantly vibrates. Not violently, but just enough to be annoying.

Chimes of opening: Rings loudly, any time any door with in a 10' radius is opened.

Slippers of Spider climbing: +10 to all DC checks when attempting to climb a spider.

Glove of Love: Mearly having this single, gaudy, white sequin glove in your possesion will prevent any and all romatic interludes, unless it is actively worn. (Will not increase chances of romantic encounters when worn). Cursed, may not be discarded, sold or given away. No glove, no love!

bulbaquil
2017-01-26, 07:26 AM
Cat-o-nine-tales: This large cat statue speaks non-stop, telling the same (extremely boring) nine stories over, and over, and over, and over and over....


Torturer: "We are going to use the cat-o-nine-tails on you."
Burly fighter with a high pain tolerance: "...Psh. Bring it."
*3 hours later*
Fighter: "OKAY, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT TO KNOW!"

GloatingSwine
2017-01-26, 08:15 AM
Slippers of Spider climbing: +10 to all DC checks when attempting to climb a spider.


I am p. sure D&D has spiders sufficiently large that this would have nonzero utility.

Celestia
2017-01-26, 08:30 AM
Chimes of opening: Rings loudly, any time any door with in a 10' radius is opened.
That is actually extremely useful for defenders.

Deophaun
2017-01-26, 09:09 AM
That is actually extremely useful for defenders.
Or shop keepers.

Inevitability
2017-01-26, 09:41 AM
"Useless". My single characters say otherwise. :P

The first one seems a hassle to keep moving. The third... well, let's just say it'd cause some awkward conversations with local clerics.

"You want me to cast Cure Wounds where?"

JNAProductions
2017-01-26, 09:42 AM
The first one seems a hassle to keep moving. The third... well, let's just say it'd cause some awkward conversations with local clerics.

"You want me to cast Cure Wounds where?"

What's the resonant frequency of a person anyway? :P

Stealth Marmot
2017-01-26, 09:44 AM
Orcish healing club:does 1d8 damage heals for 1d4


This actually exists. They made some sort of dagger or short sword that cast cure moderate on someone. The reason was to test if they were vampires since healing spells hurt undead, but will heal a living person.

Rude, but an effective way of getting first blood on the vamp without them getting a chance to strike first or run before getting hit.

St. Cuthbert would be proud. Everyone else asks what the hell is wrong with him.

Knaight
2017-01-26, 10:09 AM
Sword of DragonsLaying:
When use to try and kill a dragon, instead automatically permanently creates a baby dragon right next to them of the same species.

Sounds useful to me. Open up a draconic fertility clinic, and charge draconic prices.

Mutazoia
2017-01-26, 11:22 AM
Torturer: "We are going to use the cat-o-nine-tails on you."
Burly fighter with a high pain tolerance: "...Psh. Bring it."
*3 hours later*
Fighter: "OKAY, I'LL TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT TO KNOW!"

I always imagine it sounding like Ben Stein

Stealth Marmot
2017-01-26, 12:31 PM
I always imagine it sounding like Ben Stein

I imagined Ben Carson.

Mutazoia
2017-01-27, 12:21 AM
I imagined Ben Carson.

Ben Stein ftw. (Pre-time coding doesn't appear to work with the forum, so jump to 3 min 30 sec in)


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8WDJrEQZbSM&t=3m36s

Alias Unknown
2017-01-29, 08:02 AM
A ring of spell turning. When activated, a loud, clear voice says "Turning: Tee You ARE En Eye En Gee. Turning."

Helm of Invisibility. This helm is completely invisible, even when worn (the wearer is unaffected).

Boots of walking: Allows the wearer to walk at normal speed for his size/race over unobstructed terrain. While worn, the wearer cannot move faster or slower than, their normal walking speed.

Ion stone: The size of an actual ion. When activated, it orbits the users head and makes him feel generally positive about himself.

Shield of reflection. Held, the user begins to reflect on his past deed/misdeeds.

Robe of useless things. Once per turn, the wearer can reach into a pocket and pull out a random piece of crap that is no help in any situation (such as a still moist, used kleenex, a wadded piece of parchment with the punchline to a joke, but not the joke itself. Instructions for making mud, etc)

Flute of Insertion. This one time, at bard camp.....

Hat of head protection. When worn, protects the wearer's head from sun/wind/rain.

Glasses of obscured vision. This are definitely NOT your prescription.

Coin of flipping. When flipped, lands on either heads (50% chance) or Tails (50% chance). Unlimited uses per day.

Whip of cream. One flick will cover any surface with cool whip.

Lying Carpet. It is impossible for anyone standing on it to tell the truth.

Folding Goat. A successful DC 30 strength check allows you to fold this goat in half. Can only be used once.

Gem of Seething. Just holding this thing REALLY pisses you off.

Bow of Surprise. Fires small, brightly colored bows that adhere to the target, giving it a more festive appearance. Great for birthday parties and Christmas.

Sovereign Glue. Can only be used to glue Sovereigns (Kings and Queens) to each other.

Rod of One Million, Six-hundred and Eighty-two thousand, Nine-hundred and Eleven parts. Each part by itself is useless. When fully assembled, the rod immediately breaks down into its component parts, which scatter themselves across the planet. Good for wasting time.

Gauntlets of Ogre Stench. Upon donning these gauntlets, one immediately begins to smell like an overweight ogre that was forced to climb a very large flight of stairs, in the hot sun. Effect permanent, persisting even if the gauntlets are removed.

Feather of falling. When held aloft and released, this magical item will float gently to the ground, taking no damage. Does not work when in contact with any living (or dead, or undead) creature or construct.

Slug Thrower: A hand crossbow that launches an ordinary, every day, garden variety slug at the target. Does no damage, but eww gross dude!

Bulls-eye arrow: When fired, automatically his any nearby bull right in the eye (automatic critical hit). Will miss any other target automatically (it wouldn't hit the ground if you dropped it).

Cat-o-nine-tales: This large cat statue speaks non-stop, telling the same (extremely boring) nine stories over, and over, and over, and over and over....

Mirror of Scurrying. This very ornate hand mirror is always just out of reach. Functions as a hand mirror when activated.

Bohzoe's Brass Horn: When sounded, summons 1D4 clowns

Earring of ringing: When worn, emits a faint, high-pitch ringing noise in the wearers ears.

Bowl of controlling Milk Elementals: Nobodys managed to find the elemental plane of milk yet, but when they do, you are ready.

Flaming Sword: Functions as a +1 sword, and looks FABULOUS!

Armor of Displacement: When worn, has a 50% chance to teleport itself (and only itself) 5' in a random direction to avoid the blow.

Armor of Misplacement: This ornate suit of armor...wait...where is it...I was sure I had it here a second ago....

Quiver of quivering: Constantly vibrates. Not violently, but just enough to be annoying.

Chimes of opening: Rings loudly, any time any door with in a 10' radius is opened.

Slippers of Spider climbing: +10 to all DC checks when attempting to climb a spider.

Glove of Love: Mearly having this single, gaudy, white sequin glove in your possesion will prevent any and all romatic interludes, unless it is actively worn. (Will not increase chances of romantic encounters when worn). Cursed, may not be discarded, sold or given away. No glove, no love!

1) Drawing enemies to your location
2) You don't have your head covered meaning that your not a heroic mook doomed to die
3) Counters negative emotional effects such as fear
4) Atonement
5) Filling a pit trap, distracting enemies... Wait, it would never have anything in the pockets, you win this one
6) Well, there is That use and its been tested
7) Does it fully protect the head 'cause my non-magical hat only protects the top half of my head
8) Disguise, makes you seem half blind
9) Will never land on its side and roll away, good for random decisions as it removes human element from toss
10) I don't understand what it does
11) Does it beat circle of truth?
12) You win again here
13) "What do you mean I'm not angry enough to hold rage, I'm holding a gem of seething."
14) Nothing say surprise round like blinding your foe by shooting sticky bows at their eyes
15) You and I have a different sense of fun
16) How's your bluff
17) One last disguise of a doomed character or prank
18) How about a bag containing a delicate item?
19) Launch slugs into the BBEG's herb garden
20) Auto-crits against male minotaurs and male cattle, both are called bulls
21) Hours of torture as stated before
22) Distracts maids when herded properly
23) More meat shields
24) Keeps the 6 Int barbarian awake
25) As you said you are ready
26) A +1 sword you can show-off a formal events
27) A wildshaped druid will have it teleport out of their body and 12.5% into their enemy, gory fun
28) Are you trying to con me, there was never a suit of armor
29) Enough to be annoying is enough for it to wake you up therefore counters sleep effects
30) As state before shopkeeps
31) As state before large spiders
32) You wear it when you're happy to have your love interest turn up and take it off when you don't want them around.

Deophaun
2017-01-29, 09:57 AM
2) You don't have your head covered meaning that your not a heroic mook doomed to die
It's actually far more useful than that. A major problem with full helmets is that they block your field of view. Being able to essentially put a steel can over your head and have perfect visibility without so much as a slit for an arrow to slip through would be amazing for a knight.

Knaight
2017-01-29, 10:53 AM
It's actually far more useful than that. A major problem with full helmets is that they block your field of view. Being able to essentially put a steel can over your head and have perfect visibility without so much as a slit for an arrow to slip through would be amazing for a knight.

Particularly as your opponent is basically guaranteed to try for a head shot when you look like a fully armored person with no helmet. With that said, closing everything completely is still iffy - I'm not liking the ventilation and thermal properties here. A standard helmet that still has some holes, but your opponent can't tell where they are? Still really useful.

SomeNerd
2017-01-29, 01:59 PM
Rod of Summoning: Taupe - Summons 1d1 Rods of Summoning: Taupe. Disintegrates upon use.
Globe of Holding - This appears to be a common opaque black glass orb with a radius of about two feet. The Globe of Holding contains a non-dimensional space: Its inside is larger than its outside dimension. Regardless of what is contained within the Globe, it weighs a fixed amount. If okay let's just cut to the chase it's a bag of holding that nothing can be put inside because it doesn't have an opening and making one destroys the magic.
Globe of Trotting - Grants +30 to all jump checks made when playing basketball. The Globe must be held with both hands for its properties to take effect.
Tragic Carpet - This flying carpet becomes completely incorporeal when flying level or downwards, causing its occupants to fall through it.
Boots of the Hinterlands - While wearing these heavy iron boots, you automatically succeed on all checks related to ice-skating.
Armor of the Woodlands - This heavy plate armor maximizes and empowers all druidic spells cast by the wearer.
Dragontongue Elixir - This potion allows the drinker to breathe fire for 1d4 minutes. During that time, the drinker does not suffer any suffocation penalties for being within a fire-based atmosphere.

Deophaun
2017-01-29, 02:16 PM
Bag of Holding: This hemp bag is emblazoned with five leaves in a star pattern. Guards may make a Search check as a free action on anyone seen bearing one.

Bag of Padding: This bag contains a non-dimensional space that contains up to half the volume of a normal bag.

Alias Unknown
2017-01-30, 06:17 AM
Armor of the Woodlands - This heavy adamantine plate armor maximizes and empowers all druidic spells cast by the wearer.
FTFY, druids can wear heavy plate so long as it's made of a non-metal for one(1) feat.

TheTeaMustFlow
2017-01-30, 08:59 AM
FTFY, druids can wear heavy plate so long as it's made of a non-metal for one(1) feat.

Arcane Hierophants are a thing. And I'm fairly certain there's at least one Druid option in every edition bar 5th that can doesn't have the metal restriction (and in 5th the restriction is purely fluff (http://dnd.wizards.com/articles/features/rules-answers-march-2016) anyway).

Morphic tide
2017-01-31, 11:44 AM
+1 Unholy Axiomatic Bane of Outsiders(Good/Chaotic) Bastard Sword. Usable only by Chaotic Good Assassins. F.Y.L.

Banner of Anti-Magic Field. Usable only by Mystic Theurge. How many levels of casting classes did you grab for this?

Ring of +20 Jumping/Climbing/Swimming. Usable only by Lawful Good Druid. Impossible to use, and redundant.

Ring of +30 UMD/Spellcraft. Usable only by Forsaker. Impossible to use as intended, but Artificers will bypass restrictions.

Lord Torath
2017-01-31, 02:45 PM
Everythingbane Longsword - The blade of this sword can cut through any material like butter. Including it's own hilt. It's probably somewhere in the planet's core by now.Everything the blade touches, or everything the edge of the blade touches? Blades, after all, generally have one or two edges, two flats, and a tang for mounting. Only the edges are sharp.


Athasian Razor of Dwarf Grooming.It's actually the Muls (half-dwarves) that are hairless*. The dwarves just like shaving.

* At least in the original setting.

Mark Hall
2017-01-31, 03:54 PM
It's actually the Muls (half-dwarves) that are hairless*. The dwarves just like shaving.


Not according to what I've read... they're not called out as hairless, though muls are.

SomeNerd
2017-01-31, 06:09 PM
Everything the blade touches, or everything the edge of the blade touches? Blades, after all, generally have one or two edges, two flats, and a tang for mounting. Only the edges are sharp.

Everything the blade touches. Absolutely everything. Whoever enchanted it didn't know the meaning of the word 'overkill'.

Jormengand
2017-01-31, 06:41 PM
Everything the blade touches. Absolutely everything. Whoever enchanted it didn't know the meaning of the word 'overkill'.

But may, however, know the meaning of the word "Telekinesis".

SomeNerd
2017-01-31, 07:18 PM
But may, however, know the meaning of the word "Telekinesis".

Telekinesis is still a subset of everything.

Let's get back on topic here...

--Relativistic immovable rod: Entirely stationary within its own reference frame.
--Costume of the Thug: This comical clown costume provides a +1 enhancement bonus to all intimidate checks while worn as the outermost layer of clothing.
--+1 Keen Vorpal Gnome: His name is Kevin. He doesn't like to talk about how he got enchanted, and will not cooperate if wielded as a weapon. The enchantments do not apply to his own unarmed attacks, nor do they persist if he is somehow transformed.
--Eye of the Mason: All vision through this masterfully crafted stone eye is immune to illusion, and can pierce through invisibility. The enchantments on this eye do not include the ability to actually see out of it.

Newtonsolo313
2017-01-31, 07:29 PM
--Costume of the Thug: This comical clown costume provides a +1 enhancement bonus to all intimidate checks while worn as the outermost layer of clothing.


lots of people are afraid of clowns.

Malcador
2017-01-31, 08:08 PM
Cloak of elevenkind. These cloaks come in eleven different kinds. At will, the wearer of a cloak of elevenkind can exchange it for a cloak of one of the other ten kinds at any participating Magic MartTM, so long as they still have the original receipt.

aimlessPolymath
2017-01-31, 08:40 PM
Pocket Flask of Holding: Holds significantly more alcohol than it should (around a gallon), but always weighs the same.

____ of Hiding: Cannot be found by a cursory inspection. If the wielder is turned upside down and shaken, it falls out.

Glove of Shrinking: Always a little bit too snug.

Crystal Ball of Scrying: Made entirely out of jet lignite.

Coin of Decision: When flipped, always lands on its edge.

Globe of Invulnerability: Immune to spells of 4th level or lower.

+1 Holy Water: If anyone could figure out which part you hold it with to swing it, it would be pretty good.

Going through all the rings in the DMG (might accidentally curse them):

Ring of Animal Friendship: Looks like two cute animals which made friends with each other. No powers.
I had nothing good for this one, sorry.

Ring of Blinking: Wielder can close both eyes at once.

Ring of Climbing: Rolls uphill, up to a 45 degree angle.

Ring of Climbing, Improved: Rolls uphill, even up walls.

Ring of Countspells: When worn, user always knows how many spells they have remaining.

Skipping the ring of Djinni calling because it's too easy.

Ring of LMNtal command: User able to command all elementals whose elements start with an L, an M, or an N.

Ring of Energy Resistance: Resistant to energy.

Ring of Evasion: User unable to give a straight answer.

Ring of Feather Falling: When activated from above 5 ft off the ground, turns into a feather.

Ring of Force Shield: Whenever the user could choose to use a shield, they feel like it's a good idea.

Ring of Freedom of Movement: Cannot be paralyzed, grappled, entangled, etc.

Ring of Friend Shield: User has +4 to AC against their friends. Their real friends, that is.

Ring of Invisibility: Lost soon after it's made.

Ring of Jumping: When left on a table, often launches itself into the air.

Ring of Jumping, Improved: Whenever put down, launches itself into the air.

Ring of Mind Shielding: User can ask others to protect him.

Ring of Protection: Possesses a deflection bonus to AC.

Ring of the Ram: He wants it back. Soon.

Ring of Regeneration: Repairs itself if damaged.
User can restart character generation from level 1.

Ring of Shooting Stars: When activated, launches a target object towards target stellar body.

Ring of Spell Storing, Minor/Moderate/Major: Stores up to one/two/three character strings, in order.

Ring of Spell Turning: User can flawlessly pronounce words or sentences backwards.

Ring of Sustenance: Able to produce an infinite supply of stale bread. User is able to sleep even in poor conditions, such as the hard ground.

Ring of Swimming: Floats.

Ring of Swimming, Improved: Does the backstroke.

Ring of Telekinesis: Continually affected by the spell mage hand

Ring of Three Wishes: This ring is set with three rubies. Every time the user makes a wish, a ring burns out.

Ring of Water Walking: User's feet become water.

Ring of Wizardry type I, II, III, IV: This ring can cast spells, as a wizard of level 1/2/3/4. Unfortunately, it has no spellbook, spells prepared, nor the Still Spell or Silent Spell feat.

Ring of X-Ray Vision: While worn, user can perceive X-rays. Unfortunately, in a pre-industrial world, there are few sources.

Phew.

Unfortunately, I think I fell into the old "item affected by effect" pattern too much, but still.

Jormengand
2017-01-31, 09:37 PM
+1 Keen Vorpal Gnome: His name is Kevin. He doesn't like to talk about how he got enchanted, and will not cooperate if wielded as a weapon. The enchantments do not apply to his own unarmed attacks, nor do they persist if he is somehow transformed.

Doesn't sound very keen to me. :smalltongue:

Celestia
2017-01-31, 10:21 PM
That coin could be quite useful for gambling cons. Granted, you can only do it once person because they'll get incredibly suspicious if it lands on edge twice in a row, but you could still make some nice cash out of it.

Fable Wright
2017-01-31, 11:22 PM
Ring of Shooting Stars: When activated, launches a target object towards target stellar body.

I would like to launch the death knight's armor to... andromeda, please. While he's wearing it.

aimlessPolymath
2017-01-31, 11:29 PM
Ha! Found it in my bookmarks: The Big Bag of Useless Magic Items (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?311144-Dakhem-Uaid-s-Big-Book-of-Useless-Magic-Items). A true classic for any aspiring itemcrafter. Highlights include the Cube of Randomness, capable of providing one of six different values, the Helm of 20: Once per round, roll a d20, the Self-Scooting Chair, Frisbee's Floating Disk, Mordenkainen's Unfaithful Watchdog, your very own Personal Dis-Organizer, a Potion of Flies, and the Ring of Moods.

DataNinja
2017-02-01, 12:10 AM
If you want mostly useless, there's a big list here (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showthread.php?399328-List-of-Mostly-Useless-Magic-Items).

And a link to a categorically organized first four pages here (http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showsinglepost.php?p=20132612&postcount=857).

Lord Torath
2017-02-01, 01:31 PM
Ring of LMNtal command: User able to command all elementals whose elements start with an L, an M, or an N. Redcloak would have a field day with this one. A Neptunium elemental? Yikes! Drop a Lithium elemental into water. I'm not certain of the special properties of Mendelevium, but Mercury elementals could be very powerful.

Varsuvius would find it distasteful.

Max_Killjoy
2017-02-01, 01:36 PM
Redcloak would have a field day with this one. A Neptunium elemental? Yikes! Drop a Lithium elemental into water. I'm not certain of the special properties of Mendelevium, but Mercury elementals could be very powerful.

Varsuvius would find it distasteful.


Lithium in water... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRKK6pliejs

mig el pig
2017-02-01, 01:48 PM
Orcish healing club:does 1d8 damage heals for 1d4


Not to shabby versus undead

Mark Hall
2017-02-01, 01:58 PM
Everything the blade touches. Absolutely everything. Whoever enchanted it didn't know the meaning of the word 'overkill'.

There is no overkill. There is only "Open Fire" and "I need to reload."

If you're leaving scorch-marks, you need a bigger gun. (http://schlockmercenary.wikia.com/wiki/The_Seventy_Maxims_of_Maximally_Effective_Mercenar ies)

Newtonsolo313
2017-02-01, 03:03 PM
Not to shabby versus undead

It also heals undead

Douche
2017-02-01, 03:14 PM
Shield of Etherealness - medium shield that turns ethereal when struck

Shield gets struck, turns ethereal, attackers arm goes through shield. No longer being struck, it solidifies. Attackers arm is still through the shield, his matter is now interrupted by the matter of the shield. Arm gets instantly severed by mystical shield

You just gave away the most overpowered shield imaginable. Heh, nothin personnel

Max_Killjoy
2017-02-01, 03:24 PM
Shield gets struck, turns ethereal, attackers arm goes through shield. No longer being struck, it solidifies. Attackers arm is still through the shield, his matter is now interrupted by the matter of the shield. Arm gets instantly severed by mystical shield

You just gave away the most overpowered shield imaginable. Heh, nothin personnel

Depends on how long it stays ethereal.

Alternatively, the shield can't re-solidify with something through it.

Or, the part of the shield that has something through it can't re-solidify, and the shield now has a hole in it.

Mutazoia
2017-02-02, 03:15 AM
There is no overkill. There is only "Open Fire" and "I need to reload."

If you're leaving scorch-marks, you need a bigger gun. (http://schlockmercenary.wikia.com/wiki/The_Seventy_Maxims_of_Maximally_Effective_Mercenar ies)

If violence is your last resort, you are not resorting to it soon enough.

If violence isn't solving all of your problems, you are not using enough of it.

Leucis
2017-02-02, 09:39 AM
The dagger of criticality: everything you do with this dagger causes it to explain what you did wrong in a condescending or insulting way. (Usually, its explanations are somewhat inaccurate.)

Bohandas
2017-02-05, 11:50 PM
Hello friends i love item such as Ring of detect fire Range : touch

http://www.giantitp.com/forums/showsinglepost.php?p=21662068&postcount=62

LokiRagnarok
2017-02-06, 06:45 AM
I would like to launch the death knight's armor to... andromeda, please. While he's wearing it.

I would like to launch the death knight's armor into the moon - which just happens to be on the other side of the planet right now.

Say, how much bludgeoning damage does a planet do?

Newtonsolo313
2017-02-06, 06:49 AM
I would like to launch the death knight's armor into the moon - which just happens to be on the other side of the planet right now.

Say, how much bludgeoning damage does a planet do?
By raw
1d4+str mod

TheTeaMustFlow
2017-02-06, 06:54 AM
By raw
1d4+str mod

It's not an improvised weapon, because you're not picking it up and hitting someone with it, or throwing it at someone. Also, you're forgetting the falling damage. (There'd be suffocation checks too, if the Death Knight needed to breathe)

eru001
2017-02-06, 07:52 AM
The Artillery Piece of Ratio Regis

Upon firing, rather than launching a projectile, summons 2d4 monarchs who proceed to have a spirited debate about a random topic.

hymer
2017-02-06, 07:59 AM
The Artillery Piece of Ratio Regis

Upon firing, rather than launching a projectile, summons 2d4 monarchs who proceed to have a spirited debate about a random topic.

Shouldn't that be 'rationes regum', then? :smallwink:

Fable Wright
2017-02-06, 11:02 AM
The Artillery Piece of Ratio Regis

Upon firing, rather than launching a projectile, summons 2d4 monarchs who proceed to have a spirited debate about a random topic.

This is the. Best. Loot farm. Ransom the kings! Or murder them and sell their finery! Keep firing until you have all monarchs in the world at your location for nefarious purposes! Load the monarchs into your other cannons!

Mai
2017-02-06, 05:48 PM
Cursed Dice Set: anyone who touches these dice must therefore roll dice to determine how well they do anything of importance. (Proposing? Hope you don't roll a low number... Of a 1) While attemping any important action, you must roll or automatically take an epic fail. Don't worthy though, the dice will teleport to you whenever you need them and can't be destroyed or damaged in any way.

Alias Unknown
2017-02-07, 04:17 AM
Self-destruct button: when pressed the button is destroyed in a way that affects nothing around it
Defective love potion: causes people to confess their love does not including people, places, objects or ideas
Gentleman's literature: literature that only true gentlemen want to read, this is not porn

eru001
2017-02-07, 10:24 AM
Shouldn't that be 'rationes regum', then? :smallwink:

Nope. This gives the kings something to argue about.

Cealocanth
2017-02-11, 06:03 PM
Gentleman's literature: literature that only true gentlemen want to read, this is not porn

I don't know about you, but I certainly subscribe to Tophats and Monocles Quarterly.

Lemmy
2017-02-11, 10:52 PM
Glass of See Invisibility that works so well it allows you to see air. Doesn't work underwater. Or in space. :smallbiggrin:

Morphic tide
2017-02-12, 12:01 AM
Fatebane: This dreaded artefact is often underestimated due to it's status as an item well within mortal means of creation, but it's power causes most to give up and declare it beyond mortal creation. What this cursed blade does is force all things to go as viscously as possible, with all strikes finding perfect openings and the hardest of wills faltering at the worst moment.
-Mechanics: All defensive rolls(saves, HP rolls, dispels and so on) within 500 ft. are treated as Natural Ones for all purposes, and all offensive rolls(attack rolls, damage rolls, CL checks to bypass Anti-Magic Fields, opposed checks for the aggressor and so on) within 500 ft. are treated as the highest possible roll. Beyond this, the weapon is a +1 Ghost Touch Throwing Returning Shocking Burst Adimantine Scyth.
--Why it's useless: All attacks from your enemies are full auto-crits at max damage, all your saves are Natural Ones and everything is a worst case scenario for the defender. Even your hit dice rolls, if you make those as rolls, will be Natural Ones. Granted, the user of the thing is toting 55 damage per hit on the target and 30 damage in an AoE, before other modifiers, and you can throw the thing every round as a surprisingly effective ranged weapon, with considerable AoE damage, but it's still making every offence be at it's maximum and every defence be at it's minimum. And your allies get the same bonus... Basically, everything becomes a slaughter.

Fable Wright
2017-02-12, 02:48 PM
-Mechanics: All defensive rolls(saves, HP rolls, dispels and so on) within 500 ft. are treated as Natural Ones for all purposes, and all offensive rolls(attack rolls, damage rolls, CL checks to bypass Anti-Magic Fields, opposed checks for the aggressor and so on) within 500 ft. are treated as the highest possible roll. Beyond this, the weapon is a +1 Ghost Touch Throwing Returning Shocking Burst Adimantine Scyth.

So what you're saying is that this just guarantees the effectiveness of Scry n' Die tactics, and you can turn it off by hiding it 500ft away from you. I mean, this gets redundant at high levels, but it still works at bringing rocket tag to level 7.

Morphic tide
2017-02-12, 03:03 PM
So what you're saying is that this just guarantees the effectiveness of Scry n' Die tactics, and you can turn it off by hiding it 500ft away from you. I mean, this gets redundant at high levels, but it still works at bringing rocket tag to level 7.

Only if you get off the first save-or-die, and you have the issue of anything defensive getting a natural one, including you stuff, and the weapon is a two handed weapon so it eats a spell to carry it without screwing with your casting. And how, exactly, can one hold something 500 ft. away? I'm fairly sure it's out of the range of most stuff that would be able to hold things.

Fable Wright
2017-02-12, 10:20 PM
Only if you get off the first save-or-die

Right, so you've got surprise round from 'porting in + Celerity to get that without issue.


and you have the issue of anything defensive getting a natural one,

See surprise round, and the fact that you don't need to save against things that you're immune to.


including you stuff, and the weapon is a two handed weapon so it eats a spell to carry it without screwing with your casting. And how, exactly, can one hold something 500 ft. away? I'm fairly sure it's out of the range of most stuff that would be able to hold things.

So I just wear it on my back instead of holding it in my hands, and when I'm not using it, I either place it in extradimensional storage (which blocks line of effect and removes the weapon from my dimension regardless), or Leomund's Secret Chest (because no one can argue that the obscure corner of the Astral Plane that the chest hides on is within 500ft of you, though you can access it at any time).

Deophaun
2017-02-12, 10:30 PM
--Why it's useless: All attacks from your enemies are full auto-crits at max damage, all your saves are Natural Ones and everything is a worst case scenario for the defender. Even your hit dice rolls, if you make those as rolls, will be Natural Ones. Granted, the user of the thing is toting 55 damage per hit on the target and 30 damage in an AoE, before other modifiers, and you can throw the thing every round as a surprisingly effective ranged weapon, with considerable AoE damage, but it's still making every offence be at it's maximum and every defence be at it's minimum. And your allies get the same bonus... Basically, everything becomes a slaughter.
Hardly useless.

"It's a pity they both can't lose," said Kissinger.
"Ah, but they can," the dread sword whispered.

Mutazoia
2017-02-14, 03:34 AM
"It's a pity they both can't lose," said Kissinger.
"Ah, but they can," the dread sword whispered.

"He would have finished him off then and there, but pity stayed his hand. It's a pity I've run out of bullets, he thought, as he went back up the tunnel..."

SomeNerd
2017-02-14, 07:40 PM
Headband of Sleepy Hollow: As long as the user is wearing this headband, they suffer no ill effects from decapitation.

+5 Sword of the Rogue: This sword is considered to be a set of +5 masterwork tools when used for an open lock check.

+5 Sword of the Rouge: 5 redder than all other swords. 5 what? ...5 reds, of course.

Bottomless Quiver: Any arrow placed into this magical quiver falls out of the bottom of it, as though it had no bottom.

The Eye of Llolth: While this item is inherently magical due to being the body part of a deity, it doesn't actually bond with the body of a mortal when placed into an eye socket.

The Jar of Holding: This Glass Jar functions as a Bag of Holding Type IV. However, due to the lid creating an airtight seal, it requires a DC 80 strength check to open (DC 70 if you run the lid under hot water first).

Talisman of Clerical Mastery: When worn, prevents the user from making errors while filling out forms or paperwork honestly.

Inevitability
2017-02-15, 05:37 AM
Headband of Sleepy Hollow: As long as the user is wearing this headband, they suffer no ill effects from decapitation.

Wouldn't this mean a decapitated person with this headband would just continue to live as a disembodied head?

Mutazoia
2017-02-15, 06:18 AM
Wouldn't this mean a decapitated person with this headband would just continue to live as a disembodied head?

Not only that, but their body would still function normally, as if the head was attached. Basically the person becomes a dullahan.

Alias Unknown
2017-02-15, 08:14 AM
+5 Sword of the Rogue: This sword is considered to be a set of +5 masterwork tools when used for an open lock check.
A +5 lockpick for open locks that can also open chests as a sword.

SomeNerd
2017-02-15, 08:22 AM
Not only that, but their body would still function normally, as if the head was attached. Basically the person becomes a dullahan.

Only if they have a way to also prevent the ill effects of having their body removed. The headband lets the body survive without the head, not the other way around. (Although, a version that actually worked properly would also be cool)


A +5 lockpick for open locks that can also open chests as a sword.

Only if you don't mind the circumstance penalty from trying to fit a sword into a lock...

Morphic tide
2017-02-15, 09:30 AM
Only if they have a way to also prevent the ill effects of having their body removed. The headband lets the body survive without the head, not the other way around. (Although, a version that actually worked properly would also be cool)

Wait, so it actually is only missing blood loss management and breathing on the head's side? Like, you keep full control of your body as a severed head? I'd slap life support functions on top of it to keep the severed head alive.

Kami2awa
2017-02-26, 06:31 PM
Once saw a suggestion of a set of hats which, when worn, make you invisible to anyone wearing another one of the hats.