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Fire Tarrasque
2018-05-10, 10:16 PM
So.
It's late, and I feel like doing this. This subclass is obviously, totally inane and absurd.
Join the Church of Crocoduck. We offer eternal salvation and cookies. We take all comers.


Tenets of Crocoduck:
Worship Lord Crocoduck: Crocoduck is our lord and savior. He will deliver us to salvation and cookies. All will accept Crocoduck.
Protect Lord Crocoduck: Lord Crocoduck's teachings must be guarded. Those who chose to attack Lord Crocoduck must be destroyed.
Fight for Lord Crocoduck: We must not only passively protect, we must hunt down and destroy the evils of this world!

Bonus Spells:
3rd: Animal Friendship, Jump.
5th: Beast Sense, Snilloc's Snowball Swarm.
9th: Conjure Animals, Fly.
13th: Control Water, Dominate Beast.
17th: Control Winds, Maelstorm.


Channel Divinity
When you take this oath at 3rd level, you gain the following two Channel Divinity options.

Holy Quack: You let out a mighty quack, shaking the very ground itself. As an action, you quack into your holy symbol, which echoes a sound loud enough to be heard 100 feet away, creating a shockwave in a 15-foot cone emanating from in front of yourself. All creatures within the cone must succeed on a Constitution saving throw, or take thunder damage equal to 2d6 + your paladin level and be shoved 15 feet away from you, or half without a shove on a success. (All credit goes to Black Bando I literally copied this ability word for word from him. He's cool go check out his blog.)
Divine Quest: If you can find either a duck, crocodile, or a (non divine) crocoduck, you may give it a mission, of a maximum of 20 words. It gains reasonable capabilities of DM discretion to accomplish this. For instance, if you said, "Bring this message to the king," it would bring the physical message. But if you said, "Tell the king that the Orcs are storming towards the capital," it would gain a limited ability to speak to accomplish this, and if you told it, "Sing accompaniment for this song," it could either quack or sing, at DM discretion.

Aura of Crocoduck: Starting at 7th level, you and friendly creatures within 10 feet of you cannot be paralyzed. All ducks and crocodies within this aura will also attempt to protect you.
At 18th level, the aura's range extends to 30 feet.

Crocoduck Summoning: Twice per long rest, you may summon 12 hit dice worth of various forms of Crocodile, Duck, and Crocoduck.

Crocoducian Form:
At 20th level, as an action, you physically transform yourself to better fit the image of the Great Lord Crocoduck for one minute. You gain the following benefits:

You gain a flying speed equal to 1.5 times your standard walking speed.
You gain a bite attack, which deals 1d12 damage, and adds your Charisma modifier on top of Strength.
Every turn, you summon 1 hit dice worth of crocodiles or duck, or save your hit die for the next turn.
You may use your bonus action to begin wildly jumping about and flapping your newly grown wing-arms wildly. A creature of your choosing must make a Wisdom saving throw against your Spell Save DC or be frightened for 1 minute. They may repeat this save at the end of each of their turns.
You have advantage on all charisma based checks thanks to your majestic appearance.
After using this feature, you must make a long rest before using it again.

You also gain a pagoda of a size, and at a location, of the DM's choice.

To be clear, I ACTUALLY WANT critique of this subclass.
Maybe i'll add more later. Oath of the Tarrasque in Fire Form perhaps? (Inside joke of my group. The PCs were fighting a slightly powered up Fire elemental, the Monk misses with an attack that would normally would have hit a Fire Elemental's AC, and he exclaims: "OH MY GOSH! ARE WE FIGHTING A TARRASQUE IN FIRE FORM?")
Oath of Noodleism?
Crocoduck Domain?
Circle of Crocoduck?
PATH of Crocoduck?
School of Crocoduck?
I don't know.

Also join the church of Crocoduck. We take all who apply.

jqavins
2018-05-11, 02:09 PM
Join the Church of Crocoduck. We offer eternal salvation and cookies. We take all comers.When casting Create Food and Water, you choose anywhere from one pound to all of the food as cookies, and any amount of the water as milk. Milk spoils after 24 hours.


Holy QuackThis is my new favorite exclamation. On learning or seeing something surprising, "Holy Quack!" On learning something disappointing, "Oh, holy quack." Etc.


Divine Quest: If you can find either a duck, crocodile, or a (non divine) crocoduck, you may give it a mission, of a maximum of 20 words...Wait, so, you can put a geas on a duck?

JeenLeen
2018-05-11, 02:45 PM
It seems weaker than the other Paladin archetypes.

Under tenants, does "All will accept Crocoduck" mean that the paladin must be evangelical in a "you don't have a choice" sense, or just that the paladin must accept Crocoduck? If the former, that is a harder tenant than most other paladins and likely to cause strife with other PCs. Perhaps reword?

Spell list seems good. Not the best, but not the worst.

Holy Quack seems good. Few have resistance to Thunder-damage, so that seems nice. (Note: I first misread the power as having an attack range of 100 feet, instead of just being heard 100 feet away. Your wording was clear, but I found that misreading funny enough to mention.)

The 20th-level one has flight, which most do, but nothing else sounds incredibly powerful. The bite attack is nice and will be stronger than most melee attacks, but it's probably a boost from d8 or d10 to d12, plus Charisma modifier. Good, but not awesome. Fear effect is nice as a bonus action, though I reckon most serious threats at level 20 will resist fear.
What action is the summoning ability, or is it a free action that just happens?
Is the pagoda part of the activation of the power, or just a permanent thing you have once you reach level 20? If the latter, I'd make it another class feature.

Also, I have never heard of crocoduck before, so just noting I'm not getting any of the references. Trying to PEACH.

Fire Tarrasque
2018-05-11, 03:09 PM
I don't know how to use quotes... still...
But yeah, basically you can put Geas on a duck. Or crocodile. The Geas is slightly improved, as they may gain certain abilities to complete said task.

GreatWyrmGold
2018-05-11, 04:03 PM
I feel like I'm being left out of a joke. The only Crocoduck I'm familiar with is a rhetorical device used by some Creationists, notable mostly for being brought up by evolutionary biologists as an easy representation of common misunderstandings of evolutionary theory. But this seems to be an actual crocodile/duck hybrid, apparently with the trappings of the Helix Fossil or Armok or what-have-you.

Without understanding the intent, it's hard to judge the result.

Lvl 2 Expert
2018-05-11, 04:05 PM
The tenets right now come down to "you must be a devout follower of your god and pray every day", plus a little "fight evil", but a paladin PC was going to do that anyway. I'm pretty sure you can come up with something better than that? Something about never settling for the known path when you can try a weird combination (like a croc and a duck) or something maybe?

Also, this goes without saying, but as a sort of real world parody religion, avoid playing where fellow players could take offense at it.

Fire Tarrasque
2018-05-11, 04:31 PM
I'm fully aware of this.
I'm not actually going to use it. Unless a comedy campaign ensues.
And yes, you actually are correct, that is the correct Crocoduck. It has also become a meme, and i've decided to worship it as a god. Am currently engaged in a minor religious war.

jqavins
2018-05-11, 05:12 PM
But yeah, basically you can put Geas on a duck.
But: Geas, sounds like "geese", on a duck. Did no one get it, or is it just not as funny as I think?

Fire Tarrasque
2018-05-13, 10:25 AM
I didn't even get that while writing it.
That was an accident.

Caelestion
2018-05-13, 12:37 PM
It's actually pronounced somewhat closer to gesh.

Fire Tarrasque
2018-05-14, 07:32 PM
GAY-ES. It's GAY-ES.

Sicarius Victis
2018-05-15, 06:13 PM
But: Geas, sounds like "geese", on a duck. Did no one get it, or is it just not as funny as I think?

Put geese on a duck? HERESY!


GAY-ES. It's GAY-ES.

[Insert 30-page long flame war on the pronunciation of Geas that eventually devolves into little more than accusations of "Hitler" here.]