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theMycon
2008-01-26, 06:16 PM
Bear with me, for a moment, while I explain how I got to the idea of becoming a resistless firebreathing panda.

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So, my friend's starting a campaign (lvl 7) and I'm doing my favorite video game villain- Sven T. Uncommon from Popful Mail. The best way to describe him is "a shapeshifting madman with some nearly useless magic and a severe case of hero-worship for Arnold Schwarzenegger." Asking around, people said the best way to do this was Druid 5/Master of Many Forms. "Produce Flame" looks exactly like the spell he uses every 3-5 seconds- Thumbs up, let's do this.

The rest of my party is not so intrigued. We've never seen any SegaCD games before, and you're kinda a healer anyway, why not just do Cleric so none of us has to do it? I think for a moment, and explain "we'd all have more fun if I could act out my favorite Far Side cartoons."

"Such as?" They ask.

"Polar bear, hugging an igloo missing the top. Caption 'I love these things. They're crunchy on the outside, but they've got a warm, chewy center.'"

Upon hearing this point, the DM asks me what level I'd need to be to do that. MoMFs get large at 2nd level, so 7. Okay, we're 7. The rest of the group looks over the classes, wants me to optimize a bit. "Why not Dru6/MoMF1 with Natural Bond? That'd make your animal companion twice as strong. Heck, why not just Dru7? You'd get an extra spell level!"

I, once again, sit back to consider- do I go with "cool" or "deadly"? I need MoMF 2 to become a large animal. I read the druid spell list again. I check the text on "produce flame" once more- 1st level spell, duration of practically forever... where would it go if my hands were front paws and unable to hold stuff, but it can't hurt me... Huh...

The explanation ends with the now-immortal line: "How could anyone say no to a firebreathing polar bear?"

This somehow turns into a discussion of who'd be harder to resist, should they ask you for a favor- a firebreathing panda or a firebreathing polar bear? The panda, of course, wins hands down, but Monster Manual doesn't have stats for them.
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So, if anybody knows a way to make a panda, I'd appreciate it.

Ideas for how to make a better Sven T. Uncommon are also accepted. He should be more-or-less human, have at least 1st (and probably 2nd) level fire spells, and be able to shapeshift as widely as possible. I'd be perfectly willing to ignore the animal companion & spells above 2nd level if there's a way to turn it into more morphing.

Thanks, all.

KillianHawkeye
2008-01-27, 11:10 AM
Just use the stats for a Black Bear. What it looks like is not that big of a deal.

Adumbration
2008-01-27, 11:17 AM
I was so sure when I saw the title that this was about a Pandarean Drunken Master.

I stand corrected.

Zenos
2008-01-27, 11:27 AM
I was so sure when I saw the title that this was about a Pandarean Drunken Master.

I stand corrected.

Well, it does include fire-breathing pandas, it seems.

UglyPanda
2008-01-27, 11:28 AM
Sadly, not even Oriental Adventures contains stats for pandas. I have looked for official stats for pandas many many times already. Wizards has not officially stated a panda for 3.5.

nargbop
2008-01-27, 12:13 PM
As above, use the stats for Black Bear. Ithink in real life pandas are a bit smaller, but this is a fire-breathing PC panda, for mike's sake!

Hmm... non-player pandas should get a CHA +2 racial bonus. For fuzzy.

theMycon
2008-01-27, 03:06 PM
As above, use the stats for Black Bear. Ithink in real life pandas are a bit smaller, but this is a fire-breathing PC panda, for mike's sake!
According to Wikipedia, the "average" panda is in the lower range for a healthy adult black bear. Logically, a Player Chararacter panda should thus be as big as the regular black bear.


Hmm... non-player pandas should get a CHA +2 racial bonus. For fuzzy.
This is probably why all the ladies I asked unanimously vote that they'd be more willing to do favors for a panda bear.

*insert double entendre here*

LibraryOgre
2008-01-27, 03:15 PM
My suggestion would be to figure out the stats for a raccoon, then make it medium sized.

UglyPanda
2008-01-27, 03:21 PM
There aren't official raccoon stats either, that's defeating the purpose. Also, this is a giant panda (Bear-like), not a red panda (Fox-like).

Black bears do work pretty well statwise as pandas. Sadly, they're nowhere as cute. I would suggest decreasing the STR and increasing the DEX, though.

LibraryOgre
2008-01-27, 03:23 PM
There aren't official raccoon stats either, that's defeating the purpose.

Oh, in that case, you need to take the stats for a panda and reduce them to tiny, so you have raccoon stats to work from. :smallbiggrin:


Also, this is a giant panda (Bear-like), not a red panda (Fox-like).

*shrug* If we had raccoon stats to work with, I imagine that you'd find increasing them from Tiny to Medium would work very well for giant pandas, as well.

Incidentally, the game "Temple of Elemental Evil" allowed druids (and, one presumes, high-level rangers) to summon pandas as animal companions. They were on par with black bears.

UglyPanda
2008-01-27, 03:36 PM
I really have to check out that game if pandas are included.

So many animals are unstated. No stats for domesticated pigs or cows, despite being able to purchase them is some splatbook I can't remember. There are no stats for common city animals, such as pigeons or flies. Many insects have monstrous forms but no normal stats.

Wasn't there some thread in Homebrew devoted to stating animals? If there was, could someone point me to it?

Drascin
2008-01-27, 03:40 PM
Oh, in that case, you need to take the stats for a panda and reduce them to tiny, so you have raccoon stats to work from. :smallbiggrin:


Man, that reasoning is worthy of my Algebra teacher. Yes, he's been subjected to heavy chalk fire at some moments for things like these :smalltongue:

LibraryOgre
2008-01-27, 03:43 PM
Man, that reasoning is worthy of my Algebra teacher. Yes, he's been subjected to heavy chalk fire at some moments for things like these :smalltongue:

Yeah, I used to teach history, until I realized I only liked kids in small doses and when I had leave to smack 'em.

As for standard animals, I'll suggest going with Palladium's Monsters and Animals. It's got a good number of animals in it, in a game format that's pretty close to D&D's (especially earlier editions), and you can use that for most of it. Just turn dodge bonuses into AC bonuses from dexterity and size.

Lyndworm
2008-03-12, 05:12 AM
I really have to check out that game if pandas are included.

So many animals are unstated. No stats for domesticated pigs or cows, despite being able to purchase them is some splatbook I can't remember. There are no stats for common city animals, such as pigeons or flies. Many insects have monstrous forms but no normal stats.

Wasn't there some thread in Homebrew devoted to stating animals? If there was, could someone point me to it?

Actually, there are stats for cows. Look up bison in the SRD. It states that those stats are meant to apply to most similarly sized herd animals.

Closet_Skeleton
2008-03-12, 07:36 AM
*shrug* If we had raccoon stats to work with, I imagine that you'd find increasing them from Tiny to Medium would work very well for giant pandas, as well.

Giant Panda have nothing to do with raccoons apart from sharing the name Panda with a kind of raccoon. This is like saying if you take the stats for a Viper and reduce it to fine you have the stats for a large earthworm.

Mr. Friendly
2008-03-12, 07:47 AM
I would agree that using a black bear as the base is the best bet. I also think that decreasing the STR and increasing DEX is the way to go. It should also get a racial bonus to Hide when in high grass/bamboo.Say, replace the Black Bear Swim bonus with +4 to Hide; increases to +8 in high grass or bamboo.

Azerian Kelimon
2008-03-12, 07:53 AM
That said, the warcraft tabletop game pretty surely had stats for Pandaren. And those would be useful for pandas fo' sure.

Zephyros
2008-03-12, 10:13 AM
...couldn't resist...


FOR PANDEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA








ps: Is there any trouble brewing?





ps2: Have one on the house!