Doctor Robotnik vs Invader Zim

[Xefas]

The stage: a 3 x 3 x 3 mile hollow cube of impenetrable, opaque, force.

The bottom mile of the cube is filled with dirt.

Built on the dirt, exactly one mile from each other (so 1 half mile from the center, each) are two extensive, generic, mad-scientist lairs filled with the latest in modern military technology. However, nothing in either base is pre-assembled; the basic tech is just laying around.

Both characters start in their respective headquarters with no tech or equipment from their own worlds. They each know of the other and the circumstances of the challenge.

This means that Zim does not have his P.A.K., which is usually his only means of nutrition and life-support, however, for the purposes of this challenge, he can survive perfectly without it.

Also, neither character is required to eat or sleep to operate at optimal level.

Two extraordinarily intelligent, incredibly stupid men pitting their wits against one another in a fight for survival. Who dies first?

This all started with a conversation between me and a friend about Avatar, and then we got off in a tangent about Nick being stupid for canceling Invader Zim, and about Zim being incredibly stupid while still being very intelligent, and then it developed into listing people who were portrayed the same way, and Doctor Robotnik's name came up. The versus battle argument began from there, with me positing that Zim would narrowly succeed in such a challenge, and him asserting that Doctor Robotnik would crush Zim utterly. I thought this would be the best place to take it for additional consideration.

[hylian chozo]

Is this Dr. "EGGMAN" Robotnik or his grandfather, the original Dr. Robotnik? It matters.

I have little experience with Invader Zim, but I'm pretty sure Robotnik loses.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Depends. Does Zim get his kickass quotes of insanity? Or His Fantastic Voyage-esque minimech? It's a pretty hard versus.

Unless we have "LIES/LICE! IT'S ALL LIES/LICE!"

[Xefas]

Is this Dr. "EGGMAN" Robotnik or his grandfather, the original Dr. Robotnik? It matters.

I'm thinking Eggman, if by "his grandfather" you mean the guy who built all the junk in Sonic Adventure 2 (Shadow, the Space Colony, etc).


Does Zim get his kickass quotes of insanity? Or His Fantastic Voyage-esque minimech?

Well, he can talk, and that is the kind of thing he says, so yes to the first one. If by "minimech" you mean his P.A.K., with the spider legs and the tools and stuff, then no. However, for the purposes of this challenge, he is able to survive without it (which he normally can't).

I'll go edit that in.

[F.H. Zebedee]

Due to Zim's schtick, I personally vote for "Zim misunderstands the rules of the situation, utterly devastates an ant colony, and declares himself totally victorious."

It's not quite the same: Zim is a much more personal threat for a schoolboy, while Eggman's more of the type to do something militarily inclined. The odds?
30% Eggman's robot army trounces Zim.
10% Zim hacks Eggman's created robotic army/otherwise screws it over in some other odd way, ruining Eggman's plans.
10% Face to face combat, Eggman wins due to more serious experience.
5% Zim somehow wins in a bizarre way in personal combat.
15% Zim does something that circumvents the battle's normal routes entirely, and still beats Eggman. It could be slipping laxatives in his breakfast, or slipping past his defenses by pretending to be a robot, then wrecking up the place, or something even more bizarre. But it IS Zim, after all.
10%: Zim totally defeats himself.
10%: Eggman defeats himself.
10%: Mutually assured self defeat.

Overall, I think Eggman's better off, but Zim is a wildcard against almost ANY opponent you could think of. Sometimes, he's incredibly devious and cunning. Other times... Yah.

[Hectonkhyres]

My money is on Zim finding some way to make sure that everybody loses... and then declares complete victory due to his everpresent delusions of grandure. If there is anything that little mutant does best, its that.

Expect self-replicating, Von Neumann twinkies or cthulid hamsters or a mind control disco mall. It will be freakish, it will work contrary to what is desired, and yet it will still be massively destructive. And he will be able to come up with it with nothing more than a monkeywrench, two rocks, a dead cat, and his own squeedleyspooch.

Bonus points if he just teleports away and leaves Robotnik entombed in the cube of force... with only a walnut-chewing moose for company. Even more bonus points if they are both trapped with said moose and no way to fight each other.

[Azerian Kelimon]

I'm thinking Eggman, if by "his grandfather" you mean the guy who built all the junk in Sonic Adventure 2 (Shadow, the Space Colony, etc).



Well, he can talk, and that is the kind of thing he says, so yes to the first one. If by "minimech" you mean his P.A.K., with the spider legs and the tools and stuff, then no. However, for the purposes of this challenge, he is able to survive without it (which he normally can't).

I'll go edit that in.

Nah, not the PAK. What I'm thinking is the mech he used to enter Dib's body in one episode. Eggman doesn't have anything to deal with that kind of threat, or insane quotes.

[Icewalker]

I think Zim is given a huge handicap by being limited to modern technology. He knows nothing about non-Irken mechanics.

[Xefas]

Nah, not the PAK. What I'm thinking is the mech he used to enter Dib's body in one episode. Eggman doesn't have anything to deal with that kind of threat, or insane quotes.

No, he doesn't get the shrinking mech thingy.

Also, while I agree Robotnik has no adequate response to Zim's psychopathic musings, his old 90s Saturday Morning Cartoon version did have such great insults as "Fish-Fondling Fruitcake".

You don't normally get that quality of alliteration outside of Darkwing Duck.

[Blayze]

To be honest, I think it all really depends on *which* Eggman/Robotnik we're talking about here. As in "What Sonic series?"

Are we talking Sonic SatAM? Sonic X? The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog? Sonic Underground? That... Sonic movie thing that I think might be something to do with one of the previously-mentioned series?

And that's assuming we're even going by the cartoons. There's the Fleetway and Archie comic versions to consider, not to mention the endless series of games...

[poleboy]

Doesn't Zim usually fail at pretty much everything he really sets his mind to? Or is it just because of meddling humans and incompetent (but awesome) assistants?

[Revlid]

Frankly, a large portion of Zim's failures are directly due to GIR. Without him he'll do vastly better than normal.

Also, Zim is less restricted in terms of what he can do, morally.

(Game) Eggman's evil is really rather childish - he uses animals to power his robots, and that's about it.
Zim sees absolutely nothing wrong with stealing and ingesting the organs of an entire school of children in order to avoid being found out by a Skool Nurse.

Eggman would stick his ridiculous plush-esque animals into robots.

Zim would turn them into a some kind of Frankensteinien mutant hive-mind, an ever-mutating column of flesh and fur, cursed with the ability to feel pain a thousand times more acutely than mere mortals, and to use its vast psychic abilities to bestow their supernatural agony onto others.

He was aiming to just dissect them, but whatever. Success!

[Rutee]

You don't normally get that quality of alliteration outside of Darkwing Duck.

You know, I have the heads of several sources who informed me Darkwing Duck would be in Kingdom Hearts II. They're in jars. I miss that show dearly.

I'm going to say, on topic.. ...nn.. mmmnn.... Zim in a narrow victory. His insanity is usually so much more over the top then Eggman's. He would invoke a plan so crazy, it crosses the line twice and goes back to insane. He'd probably explain it in detail to Robotnik, because he can, and it'd make Robotnik's head explode as he tried to comprehend the convoluted plan.

Then Zim's head would explode, just for the fun of it.

[Xefas]

To be honest, I think it all really depends on *which* Eggman/Robotnik we're talking about here. As in "What Sonic series?"

They're all the same person, really; just with varying degrees of seriousness. I guess we'll assume the video game version, since that was the original one, and probably the most effective. I, for one, can't even fathom how to create a Bunny-Powered Fuel Cell, much less the robot its installed in.


You know, I have the heads of several sources who informed me Darkwing Duck would be in Kingdom Hearts II. They're in jars. I miss that show dearly.

Me too. At least we got a cameo from Scrooge McDuck.

I, for one, won't be satisfied with KHIII unless there's a boss fight featuring Xanatos and the Steel Clan.

All I could think about going through the World That Never Was the first time was "Well, there has to be an NPC party member for this world. Which Disney characters live in a big city? OH MY GOD"

And then it turned out to be Riku and I was sad.

EDIT: And do you have to change your avatar so often? I almost didn't recognize you :smallsmile:

[Hectonkhyres]

They're all the same person, really; just with varying degrees of seriousness. I guess we'll assume the video game version, since that was the original one, and probably the most effective. I, for one, can't even fathom how to create a Bunny-Powered Fuel Cell, much less the robot its installed in.
Indeed. The game version is less innately self-sabotaging and generally manages to keep a handle on his personal idiot ball. He still has a problem in that his technology has to conform to some semblance of realism... while Zim's blatantly and repeatedly kicks the laws of physics (and common sense) in the scrotum.



I, for one, won't be satisfied with KHIII unless there's a boss fight featuring Xanatos and the Steel Clan.

You have gained new levels of respect by just saying that.
May you live a hundred years.

Edit: Though I can't quite accept the idea of any boss fight where Xanatos actually loses.

[Drascin]

You know, I have the heads of several sources who informed me Darkwing Duck would be in Kingdom Hearts II. They're in jars. I miss that show dearly.

...That would have been awesome. Darkwing Duck was great, even in the butchered dubbing we got around here, and I didn't miss an episode if I could help it at all. The mere presence of Darkwing would have elevated KH2 from "really good game" to "...holy CRAP!" levels.


I, for one, won't be satisfied with KHIII unless there's a boss fight featuring Xanatos and the Steel Clan.

Well, I hadn't thought about it, but now that you have mentioned it, I probably won't, either. Which, given the odds of that happening... And I was looking forward to the game so much too :smallsigh:

[Xefas]

Edit: Though I can't quite accept the idea of any boss fight where Xanatos actually loses.

Well, I imagine he would "lose" in the immediate sense, but as the protagonist sails away on their gummi ship, we get a cutscene that reveals that every action the hero took throughout their entire stay in the world was carefully crafted into his overarching scheme to attain true immortality or some such.

You don't get (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosGambit?from=Main.TheXanatosGambit) three (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosRoulette?from=Main.TheXanatosRoulette) tropes (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosSucker) named after you for nothing.

[Rutee]

I prefer Xanatos genuinely losing, preferably as a subversion of the Xanatos Roulette, but I'm idiosynchratic like that :smalltongue:


...That would have been awesome. Darkwing Duck was great, even in the butchered dubbing we got around here, and I didn't miss an episode if I could help it at all. The mere presence of Darkwing would have elevated KH2 from "really good game" to "...holy CRAP!" levels.
Darkwing Duck is pretty much hero, yeah.

[Querzis]

If we are talking about the Robotnik in the video games, I bet on Eggman. Which Robotnik matter a lot, the Robotnik from all the cartoons usually end up defeating themselves. I'm not really familiar with the two comics but those arent cannon in the first place anyway (he was never named Ivo Kintobor!)

The good old Robotnik from the videogames is always defeated because Sonic is basically unstoppable...we are talking about something that just lose rings when shot with a gun after all. Not to mention his supersonic form. But the real problem with Eggman in the game is that sometimes hes too succesfull. He often end up building something too strong for him like gamma, omega and metal sonic. His other problem is that hes simply not evil enough. People dont really take him seriously because he never kill anyone and hes the first to join the heroes when a greater evil appear (sure sometimes hes the one who created the greater evil but that doesnt matter.) But that doesnt change the fact that the original Robotnik from the game dont really have an idiot ball, the most idiotic things he does is naming all his machine 'egg something' and putting his face everywhere.

So, here is my personnal percentage:

45% Eggman wins.
10% Eggman create something that kill both of them.
10% Zim win...nobody know how, not even him, but he won.
10% Zim killed both of them.
5% Zim defeated himself.
5% Zim blew up the universe/teleported them in other dimensions/disntegrated the two base leaving them alone in the cube/other random effect
5% They team up to conquer the universe...its not like that cube can really hold them for long.

[Xefas]

Sonic is basically unstoppable...we are talking about something that just lose rings when shot with a gun after all.

If you think old 2d Sonic was unstoppable, just look at old 2d Tails.

I was playing Sonic the Hedgehog 3 (originally for the Sega Genesis) with a friend the other day (via one of those big bundle packs that were released for the Gamecube), and neither of us had played co-op on that game before.

Lo and behold, if a second player is playing Tails, not only does he move as fast as Sonic, can fly for quite a while, deal damage exactly the same as Sonic, but he's also completely and utterly invincible/unkillable.

He'd been having trouble with a certain boss while playing alone, but all we had to do this time was have him wait as Sonic at the edge of the screen while I, as Tails, ran directly at Robotnik, soaking up all the hits and killing him without any fear of reprisal.

Tails was so much more badass prior to Sonic Adventure. Oh, how the great golden two-tailed God has fallen...

[Rutee]

And the Sonic player gets whupped by Uncle Chuck in the space station :smalltongue:

[Revlid]

You don't get (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosGambit?from=Main.TheXanatosGambit) three (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosRoulette?from=Main.TheXanatosRoulette) tropes (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosSucker) named after you for nothing.

Four, actually. (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/XanatosGilligan)

[Icewalker]

Only four? (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ThirtyXanatosPileup)

[Hectonkhyres]

Truely, Xanatos is a golden god.
Unless it has already been done, we need a freeforall between all the magnificent bastards of the world... and scheming should be the name of the game. Xanatos, Gendo Ikari, everybody.

Of course Xanatos would win in the end. But it would be a sight to behold in the meantime.

[Jae]

eggman definitely dies.

In basically everything eggman has been in (vid games, tv shows, movies, comic books, etccc) he has lost HORRIDLY. I mean, we're talking about approximately a million times.

Zim managed to convince an entire WORLD that hes normal (with the exception of one or two, but its not like they BEAT him..)
Yes, usually by luck, but eggman lacks a lot of luck.

Zim wins.

[chiasaur11]

Truely, Xanatos is a golden god.
Unless it has already been done, we need a freeforall between all the magnificent bastards of the world... and scheming should be the name of the game. Xanatos, Gendo Ikari, everybody.

Of course Xanatos would win in the end. But it would be a sight to behold in the meantime.

Probably true, but I think Vetinari would do decently. He combines adaptability with the fact he'd just work to keep his own little corner safe rather than try to take the whole world.

[Azerian Kelimon]

Probably true, but I think Vetinari would do decently. He combines adaptability with the fact he'd just work to keep his own little corner safe rather than try to take the whole world.

Yeah, the more decent gambiteers, such as Artemis Fowl, Xanatos, or Vetinari, would probably ally and let the evil gambiteers face off until there is only one or two left and crush 'em.

[Rutee]

I dunno, it feels like Xanatos had lesser foes to contend with. My memory might be shoddy, but I don't remember the Gargoyles being the brightest bulbs in the box.

Not that I mean they were complete idiots either, just that he wasn't manipulating terribly intelligent characters.

[Lord Ike]

This really ironic, I just beat Dr. Robotnik(SAB2)for the 3,000,000th time, then got borred sat dxown, and found this thread.

Zim is cooler, but he will lose without his home planet equipment(not including GIR).

[Pocketa]

Robotnik, Zim doesn't know about other tech.

[chiasaur11]

Robotnik, Zim doesn't know about other tech.

Which means he misuses it horribly.
Which means he creates things that are atrocities before God and man.
Which tend to kill everything nearby to make other beings feel the same agony as they feel.
Which Zim tends to survive all the time, while when one of Robotnik's creations rebels, he tends to got crushed like a bug.

Conclusion:
Zim makes an atrocity on accident, and, in fleeing from it, he accidently lures it too Robotnik, and...
Things won't be pretty.

Advantage (barely) Zim.

[doliest]

Zim probably wins, mainly because anytime Zim makes something it exceeds his goals, unfortunately to the point where he messes it up -Smart gir(zim didn't use him right), Pepe(Let it get to big), time device(used to much), it was zim's use, but in a small space like this he'll probably make a mind control ray that makes all the equipment come alive and tries to eat him and eggman.

[palapul]

Robotnik is definitely going to win.
He knows a lot of techy stuff that can defeat Zim.

[Solo]

They both lose.

[hanzo66]

In a Vs. Thread, we all lose.


Zim managed to convince an entire WORLD that hes normal (with the exception of one or two, but its not like they BEAT him..)
Yes, usually by luck, but eggman lacks a lot of luck.

Zim wins.
In Zim's case, he lives in a Jhonen Vasquez world, IE an automatic Crapsack World. Humans are almost always horrendously stupid and/or apathetic, so it doesn't take much to trick them.

Zim could probably fight his way through the Badniks (or whatever Robotnik/Eggman's robo-mooks are called nowadays) since he's been shown as fairly skilled with Spider-Leg Fu.

Might add more later on.