Need a little help role-playing a Paladin

So, I'm playing a Conquest Pally in Curse of Strahd. Having a blast, just hit level 5. I'm learning how to use my class a little better.This is my first bit of trouble

Prelude: When starting to play a character, I typically start with a loose structure with the bonds, flaws and ideals from the books and whatnot but build the personality as I react to my companions and the world. It's lead to some hilarious characters to blossom and one to be rather memorable for me. Also, I enjoy giving the DM a PC that they can tinker and make plot hooks with.

Backstory:
This guy is basically an adventurer that previously died in the Death House and was brought back/reincarnated in Barovia by the dark powers. He still thinks he is on a mission to hunt down his power crazed father who annihilated several towns after bargaining with an evil power (Tiamat). The DM has suggested playing him as a man with two sets of memories, which can lead to some fun down the line. He got to the end of the Death House and bit the big one and went through it again, having visions of his previous run and eventually his death. He doesnt know what it means

(He did a small chunk of adventuring before as DH was a one-off for fun but kept all loot/consequences) He had friends, his ruined family, enemies, a party member who nearly got him killed on several occasions and lead to his death in DH.

The Party:
Human Ranger who seems to be playing a very Lawful Good/Neutral. Elf Rogue playing a bitter bitch* Chaotic Neutral? and one Neutral Good Gnome Druid.

Ranger plays as a voice of reason but occasionally is impulsive. (Tried to collect rent from a witch since we owned the deed to her home. Punched her in the face and she nearly kills him with a backhand. We were very worse for wear when we had gotten there anyway.)

Rogue plays as a woman embittered by the world and its cruelty. She keeps a closeful eye on me at all times due to my profession **(Player is playing the polar opposite of her personality and we all have a good time with it.)

Gnome is a precious childlike cinnamon role who became instantaneous friends with my Paladin and he will protect her with his life. She is incredibly helpful but naive. (She damn near solo-ed the Wizard of Wines encounter using Flaming Sphere and chokepoints. Which is where we stopped last game.)


The Moral Dilemma:
I went in trying to go all Edgy Conqueror but that fell apart as I wound up being the party face again. I dont mind being the face but I also dont want to turn this into Curse of Strahd: The Paladin's Story. I find it hard to use vinegar instead of honey in our social encounters, particularly since the world is already drab and pretty conquered. And I'm not sure how to intimidate effectively with Charisma. And I know certain NPCs could hand our collective asses to us on a gilded platter. (Being level 5 now makes me a little more comfortable about doing something in the future. 7 is going to be sweeeet)

I love the Conquest kit but I'm a little conflicted with role-playing his usage of fear as I seem to be rolling Good instead of Lawful Evil as I intended. Apparently my DM and the Rogue think I am Lawful Good, which I hate. (Yup, they assumed my alignment, the bastards.) I dont care about the Rogue looting like she does as thats what Rogues do and her skillset is too valuable to let something petty like a sudden missing jewelry box from a place we went to bother my Paladin. I really want to pull something that will surprise them both that isnt evil as the DM's goal is to eventually tempt us into evil

I really follow through with my ideal of it someone injures me or my allies, I will break them, body and spirit. Douse the Flame of Hope. Example: The witch from the mill, destroy her coven, all of the things they use to make the dream pastries, burn down the windmill while she watches and then break her hands to prevent her from casting magic easily. Using my healing to keep her at 1hp to make sure she experiences the whole thing.) I think a evil drug dealer

Spoiler:

Show

who is using children to make her pastries, literally

could warrant a reaction such as that from a Paladin and not take an Evil shift, right?

Also, trying to pinpoint my motivation for taking on Strahd. Everyone else is focused on finding the wizard that they chased into Barovia (The hook). And I am hunting for my deranged father. The two are not the same person.

TL;DR
Went in trying to be Conquest Pally Sauron, came out Ned Flanders. How do I bring my fear flail to the neighborino's while being a hero?

Lawful evil. Not to get on people nerves about alignment. But u respect order. But your evil. If u can manipulate the law to get what u want. Even murder it’s all good umm evil.
Think doctor doom. Will give his word and keep it if he can twist it it’s all a our word play.

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Originally Posted by ToastyTobasco

TL;DR
Went in trying to be Conquest Pally Sauron, came out Ned Flanders. How do I bring my fear flail to the neighborino's while being a hero?

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"I am here to bring justice. Not mercy."

You could model him on Judge Dredd.

Lawful Evil can mean you see yourself at the top of the pile, bringing order. It doesn't mean you have to be pleasant about how you do it.

(case in point: I have a ready-in-the-wings blue dragonborn Conqadin. His thing is that he intends to kill the blue dragon who mothered his bloodline, and replace her. He sees himself as a superior being to other humanoids, but superior to a dragon in that he has lived with humanoids, and knows better how to utilise them - which is his thing. The party? He sees them based on their value to his goal. If you're competent/skilled, you have value and he will reward that with treasure, assistance and recognition. If you don't, you're beneath his notice - like most NPCs. He's not going to MWAHAHAHAHA and kill randomly. Everyone has a place and a role to fulfill, and he's the best one to ensure that happens. It just so happens his place is at the top.)

Lawful Evil is my favorite Evil.

You don't have to do evil things all the time, or really ever if it isn't called for. You set a goal or an ideal and you go out to accomplish it. The difference between Lawful Evil and the good alignments is what you'd do to accomplish those goals or ideals. Where Chaotic Evil is generally hard to hide, you could have someone Lawful Evil in the party and if no one stands in the way of what they think is necessary they might not even do anything morally wrong.

Lawful Evil is great and all but I'm curious on examples like Dredd or motivations for a Good Conquest pally.
Hatred of Undead is easy, ruling Barovia properly instead of keeping it a snowglobe is a possibility.

The only thing that is an issue with Evil atm is there are some things in this campaign that could apparently do something nasty to me if I am already evil. But there are apparently relics that can force an alignment shift

The first thing to understand about playing a Paladin of any stripe is that you're not just some adventurer with magic/divine powers; you are an exemplar of your Oath and your power derives from it. Every time you utilise Divine Smite, cast a spell or basically do anything a Fighter can't, you're announcing to the world "I AM A PALADIN AND HERE'S THE PROOF OF IT!". Not only that, but you're declaring your adherence to your Oath each and every time. An Ancients Paladin using Divine Smite is saying "I believe my foes will bring less light and joy into the world" and so gets bonus damage, while a Vengeance Paladin is declaring "MY foe has done wrong and deserves to be punished for it". As a Conquest Paladin, you're not just some set of stats with malleable fluff; you need to decide how your Oath guides your actions and your motivations. If you are finding that, as you say, you're more of a Ned Flanders than a Judge Dredd, then both you and your GM seriously need to consider the possibility that you aren't following your Oath and are at risk of Falling. Read over your Oath again and let that influence your actions. If other players are looking at your character in play and they're only seeing an old-school LG Paladin of all things fluffy and nice, then (sorry to say it) you're doing it wrong. It's not just a case of pulling out the badass once in a while to "balance the books"; a Paladin lives their Oath, they breathe it, they eat it, they speak it; there should be no doubt (none, zero, nada, zip) in your or other characters' (PC or NPC) minds that your character has taken an Oath of Conquest. That's not to say you can't deceive, conceal or use subterfuge once in a while, but the every-day, the routine, the norm, should reflect the Oath and not your (the players) preference/susceptibility for fitting in to a certain role and not liking the idea of sour-faced diplomacy. If you don't think you can pull off a given character in actual play, then you need to consider whether you should be playing that character at all.

That said, here's some tips;

1) Read your Oath. Consider modifying it or even writing your own, to better reflect your character and not just the cookie cutter from the book.
2) Don't give in to the peer pressure to be the party Face, especially a "nice" one. You're a Conquest Paladin! The other PC's should not feel like they can rely on you to be diplomatic; you are not forgiving, you don't hedge, you don't deal. It's your way or the highway. Try fluffing a few (minor) social scenarios by taking the blunt-force-trauma approach to conversation and see how your fellow players react.
3) Decide how your Oath is reflected in your every action; your speech, combat, even in the way you shop, set camp and other minor aspects that you might not even see in play. The more of these little details you at least consider, the more you'll make the character gel.
4) Don't think that a few "semi-evil" actions will make your character fit the mould; it's not the occasional things that define a character, it's the regular, the every-day.

I think it is more interesting to play against type.

You can be an Lawful Good Conquest Paladin who channels your deity's divine power to strike fear in the hearts of your enemies. It is both a blessing and a curse and you feel conflicted about having to use such a dark power. But the ends justify the means.

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Originally Posted by JellyPooga

The first thing to understand about playing a Paladin of any stripe is that you're not just some adventurer with magic/divine powers; you are an exemplar of your Oath and your power derives from it.

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In support of this, you need to consider - why THAT oath? I play a vengadin, and yeah, I liked the build, but I really worked it into his story. He's a farmer who was consrcipted into a war he didn't care about by rich merchants and lords who wouldn't even know what town he came from, who returned after the war to see his family home burned down, and his wife killed. Now, he's driven by anger. He hates injustice and hates those who enact it without thought. He hates Strahd, because he's the living embodiment of it in many ways. By contrast, he doesn't hate the tiefling in the party, even though the war he fought in was against fiends and tieflings, because he's aware that soldiers don't get to pick. And that makes him more angry, because it's so unfair. He doesn't care greatly about most people,but won't be a jerk to them. He can still do charitable acts, like laying the Death House children to rest by carrying their bodies to repose, or give a beggar some gold for a meal. But heaven help those who commit acts of evil or injustice. I mc'ed him into Warlock/Celestial, not because of the nice symmetry of pallocks, but because the Celestial path is all about light and fire - he embodies that furious rage (for reference, we decided that's there no reason his god couldn't be his patron. He doesn't even KNOW he has a patron - he didn't seek a god or patron, he just noticed by the god of vengeance because "hey, this guy's doing my work really well! I might buff him some!", so to speak.

so, WHY conquest? It's a neat build, but if your character doesn't embody it for some reason, then you're playing an archetype and not a character. You can be a conquest paladin, LE, and still be a decent person. But you need to think about what motivates them on their path - for Gerhart, it's about getting vengeance for his losses, for others who have lost unfairly, and to prevent other people experiencing more.

So here's an angle that might fit: You believe Strahd is weak of mind(sort of true), spending too much time pining over a lost love and indulging his own whims, making him a poor leader and unfit to rule Barovia. Therefore it is up to you to cast him down and take over(or at least that's where you're headed). The seeming benevolence you have in most of your encounters is how you believe a strong ruler should behave. Maybe at some point you have an epiphany that the real reason the dark powers brought you back was not to find your father, but to destroy Strahd. With this tack, you wouldn't have to necessarily fight your natural instinct to be nice in encounters, that's just how a good sovereign treats his subjects. Then just play up the nasty with anything or anyone that crosses you.

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Originally Posted by 1Pirate

So here's an angle that might fit: You believe Strahd is weak of mind(sort of true), spending too much time pining over a lost love and indulging his own whims, making him a poor leader and unfit to rule Barovia. Therefore it is up to you to cast him down and take over(or at least that's where you're headed). The seeming benevolence you have in most of your encounters is how you believe a strong ruler should behave. Maybe at some point you have an epiphany that the real reason the dark powers brought you back was not to find your father, but to destroy Strahd. With this tack, you wouldn't have to necessarily fight your natural instinct to be nice in encounters, that's just how a good sovereign treats his subjects. Then just play up the nasty with anything or anyone that crosses you.

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This. This is what I have been trying to figure out.

Thank you