Things I May No Longer Do While Playing VI: This Isn't A Checklist, We Swear!

* Not to allow the Hoardificer to eat their Golems for craft xp just so the Golems can scream "NO DISASSEMBLE! JOHNNY FIVE IS ALIVE!!"

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Originally Posted by Socksy

**** Staring at the Pathfinder base class Blighter with sadness and despair won't turn it into the 3.5 Blighter. Time to get an Atonement spell.

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***** Similarly, staring at the 3.5 Bard won't turn it into the Pathfinder Bard
****** Or the Rogue
******* No you can't get Pathfinder feat progression in 3.5

* My battle cry is not any line from any pop song.
** Despite the mental image of a fully-armoured Maenad barbarian charging down an enemy and screaming "HULA HULA HULA HULA HULA HULA HULA HULA HOOP!"


* The BBEG Psion who loves spamming Sonic attacks is not called Screwdriver.
** Nor is her catchprase "Gotta go fast!"
*** Her Headband of Intellect +2 has been refluffed to be something other than a large golden ring.
**** Her second-in-command is not named Rose, Martha, Donna, Amy, or Tails.
***** She is not thwarted by wooden doors.
****** And she has certainly never competed at the Winter Games alongside Mario.

* When introduced to a character with the title "the All-Seeing," the correct response is not to remark, "Can he see this?" followed by a rude gesture.
** And yes, he can see that.
*** Even if he's blind.
**** Stop asking how that works.

* Similarly, when introduced to a character with the title "the All-Knowing," the correct response is not to remark, "But does he know why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch?"
** And yes, he does. It's the cinnamon-sugar swirls all over every bite. Stop asking.

* When introduced to a character with the title "All-Father," the correct response is not to make lewd remarks about parentage or legitimacy, and you deserve exactly what you get if you do.
** And what you deserve is made of lightning.

* When introduced to a character with the title "the End of All Things, the Final Fate of Man and Gods, Absolute Calamity Made Flesh," pants-crapping terror is always a correct response.
** Good job on that.

*No matter how villainous I may be, I will never be Disney Evil.
**Even if I use villain songs from kid movies as my theme music.

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Originally Posted by Grim Portent

*No matter how villainous I may be, I will never be Disney Evil.
**Even if I use villain songs from kid movies as my theme music.

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Speak for yourself. I, for one, do a mean Pat Carroll impression.

Having my monk with a skin disorder making his skin jet black put all his skill points into intimidate is not allowed
**Especially if he owns a flying carpet that runs on souls.

*i may not give people magical tattoos
**tattooing people only on the face no matter what they want tattood is going to get my PC hated by his clients
***tattooing mustaces on sleeping party members will turn this game into a pvp fora breif time.
****Tattooing Explosive Runes on people and making them charge at the enemy will turn me intothe BBEG

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Originally Posted by Red Fel

** And what you deserve is made of lightning.

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...owls?



*No matter how high my intelligence is, or how I spend my skill points, I may not play a chemistry major.
**If I am allowed to do so, I may not simply fill the BBEG's lair with FOOF.

*I may no longer whine at the GM for giving us no choice but to be captured.
**Using the Force to push the pursuing fighters into the planet's gravity well is not possible, as they are actually hundreds of miles away and several tons.
***Even if you were able to do so, it would be useless, as they still have propulsion.
****The correct response to this is not "Fly closer to the surface so I can push them into the ground."
*****This all goes double if they are Yuuzhan Vong ships, and so are Force-dead.

*Just because my little hovering translator droid, who knew the mission and the situation, was talked into be filled with explosives and sent to the base's main reactor does not mean that every droid in the galaxy is willing to do so.

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Originally Posted by Arkhosia

*Tattooing Explosive Runes on people and making them charge at the enemy will turn me intothe BBEG

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Suddenly the idea of doomsayers in the town square got interesting.

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Originally Posted by Arkhosia

****Tattooing Explosive Runes on people and making them charge at the enemy will turn me intothe BBEG

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Does wanting to use this make me a bad person? :smallamused:

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Originally Posted by Thomas Hunter

**If I am allowed to do so, I may not simply fill the BBEG's lair with FOOF.

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*** How did you make that much FOOF? And how did you store it until 15th level?!
**** If I am using real-world chemicals in the game, "magic" is not an acceptable answer to these questions.
*** Anything with fluorine in it is pre-emptively vetoed.
**** Yes, that includes fluorinated water. It's a plot to pollute our precious bodily fluids anyway.

*The big bad may not be a Reincarnated Druid
**Or a witch with the Forced Reincarnation Grand Hex.
***Or an alchemist with the Elixer of Life Discovery and the Eternal Youth Grand Discovery.
****A Monk of the Four Winds is even worse.
*****Giving the BBEG 20 levels in all of these will result in thrown books.

Spoiler: For anyone who doesn't get it. Ie. does not play PF

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All of these allow the BBEG to prevent his death or to recover from it. The Druid revives elsewhere in safety once a week if killed (notable in that this ability appears at level 5). The Witch can force themselves to reincarnate which regens all their health though they may lose spells doing so up to once a day (Level 18+). The alchemist is restored to his youth and cannot die of old age and returns to life if killed in a fight expensive but affordable since you live forever and can sell very valuable potions (Level 20 and Level 16). The monk cannot die as he no longer ages and if he dies he reincarnates 24 hours later within 20 miles (Level 20). At one point I contemplated making a vernerable MotFW 20 Druid 20 (Which lets him gain +3 to all mental stats and not suffer physical penalties (I also built this with the Ki Mystic Monk Archetype added in so the character became Nature's Champion and had a wisdom of 40. I decided to test it versus the terrasque and the Monk won. Having exceeded the Godzilla Threshold I crumpled the sheet up and threw it away to prevent temptation.).

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Originally Posted by Socksy

**** Staring at the Pathfinder base class Blighter with sadness and despair won't turn it into the 3.5 Blighter. Time to get an Atonement spell.

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What...

I don't even...

How...

THEY MANAGED TO MAKE THE BLIGHTER WORSE!?

:eek::confused:

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Originally Posted by illyahr

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Originally Posted by Arkhosia

****Tattooing Explosive Runes on people and making them charge at the enemy will turn me into the BBEG

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Does wanting to use this make me a bad person? :smallamused:

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Yes, yes it does. I think this would work better if you tattooed a mount or summoned monster instead though.

*****Arguing that the recipient of the tattoos is in no danger because she has a d10 HD will result in disgust.
******Claiming I misspelled Explosiive causing another party member to look will result in revenge being sworn upon me.
*******Arguing that gluing Explosive Rune Pages to 10 ft poles glued to allies should count as further than 10 ft of separation is not cool.
********Arguing that since the glued ER Page is 10 ft from an ally it allows a reflex save is pushing it.
*********OK, Fine, Attaching ER Pages to 11ft poles with glue and then gluing the poles to my allies and encouraging them to charge works just shut up now.

* When making a plan, I should keep the amount of technobabble to a minimum
** When telling the other players of this technobabble-filled plan, I may not say "I really have no idea what that means" at the end of it
*** Especially if I'm the designated plan-maker of the party
**** When the rest of the party decides to listen to the Barbarian's plan over mine, it may be time to rethink things a bit

* My plan as a Barbarian may not always be "Smash it!"
** My plans including "Burn it!" "Chop it!" "Lift it!" "Track it" and "Leap it" however is sufficiently flexible to have a good variety of options should Smashing it fail.
*** The Barbarians social plans may not always be "Growl at it"
**** The barbarians social plans including "sing nordic ballads about feats of awesome warriors" is however, completely awesome and should be done as much as possible.

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Originally Posted by Adoendithas

**** Yes, that includes fluorinated water. It's a plot to pollute our precious bodily fluids anyway.

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On a related note:

* Under no circumstances whatsoever am I allowed to trigger a mutually-assured destruction scenario.
** Not even if it's funny.
*** Not even if I ride the bomb to its (and my) ultimate destination.

* I am no longer allowed to participate in any Cold War settings.

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Originally Posted by Lord Raziere

** My plans including "Burn it!" "Chop it!" "Lift it!" "Track it" and "Leap it" and "Bop it" however is sufficiently flexible to have a good variety of options should Smashing it fail.

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You missed the most important plan of all.:smallwink:

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Originally Posted by Lord Raziere

* My plan as a Barbarian may not always be "Smash it!"
** My plans including "Burn it!" "Chop it!" "Lift it!" "Track it" and "Leap it" however is sufficiently flexible to have a good variety of options should Smashing it fail.
*** The Barbarians social plans may not always be "Growl at it"
**** The barbarians social plans including "sing nordic ballads about feats of awesome warriors" is however, completely awesome and should be done as much as possible.

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*****Not to figure out how to warp the rules and use Perform (Viking Choir) at all times even in place of sleep
******Not even if i took that ACF in that one book that gives my barbarian Inspire Greatness and Perform.

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Originally Posted by illyahr

Does wanting to use this make me a bad person? :smallamused:

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* I man no longer enable other GMs by saying 'Well not using it doesn't necessarily make you a good person'. :smallwink:
** Also banned from combining the aforementioned Explosive Runes idea with the Tattooed Dragon prestige class.

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Originally Posted by DigoDragon

* I man no longer enable other GMs by saying 'Well not using it doesn't necessarily make you a good person'. :smallwink:
** Also banned from combining the aforementioned Explosive Runes idea with the Tattooed Dragon prestige class.

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*** And the Red Wizard of Thay PrC
**** Regardless of how funny it would be to see one blow up his own face.

*Pranking the passed out fighter by writing explosive runes on his face is right out.
**Not to argue that he can take it b/c of having more HP than the rest of the party combined
***Funny thing about being able to survive things, you can take revenge on whatever cause it to you.

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Originally Posted by Wookieetank

*Pranking the passed out fighter by writing explosive runes on his face is right out.
**Not to argue that he can take it b/c of having more HP than the rest of the party combined
***Funny thing about being able to survive things, you can take revenge on whatever cause it to you.

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*b Putting them on the barbarian is also not allowed.
**b Especially if the barbarian can take it.
***b The goal of this game is not to have blood oaths of death sworn upon you.

*c Why would you put them on the rogue with 7 CON?!?!?!?
**c Arguing that the rogue should be allowed a saving throw since it is physically impossible for him be close enough to read the rune but he is within 10 ft.
***c Warning- doing the above may lead to but is not limited to: Stickpocketing, Pickpocketing, Framing, Backstabbing, Assassination, Being the prequisite to be an assassin, any of the above IRL.
****c Causing a PVP situation in which everyone is murdered by the rogue leading to his Start of Darkness and rise as BBEG of the next campaign while awesome will result in real life pain.

On a non-ER note:
*Not allowed to have permanencied enlarge person cast on me while holding a +1 Impact Huge lance.¹
**Not allowed to ask the barbarian to let me demonstrate its utility and then killed him down in one shot.<sup>2

1</sup> The DM ruled that you can wield weapons even if they are too big to use normally you just take a to hit penalty.
² Total Damage Calculation = 15d6+7 but I rolled a crit on him so it was 45d6+7 (I think total damage was like 200some)

* I am no longer allowed to deliberately build my character with incredibly high damage and incredibly low Will saves.
** I am not to point out that, due to how few hit points the enemies have had, my character has yet to actually deal minimum damage.

* I may not substitute my strength score for Knowledge checks
** I also may not substitute my Strength score for craft checks
*** The same applies to profession, disable device, and fly
**** Even if there were a strength score high enough to jump to the top of a building, my character does not have it
***** I may not build a character in an attempt to reach a strength score high enough to jump onto the top of a building
****** I must remember that, as a Bard, my character has plenty of other ways to solve problems than punching and stabbing
******* Not allowed to point out that so far she hasn't needed to use any of them
******** Also not allowed to point out that I have yet to deal minimum damage

*If at any point the character can beat a Bloodletter in melee combat, unarmed, it's time to retire.

*If at any point the character can hit more times than most enemies have wounds, it's time to retire.

* Any character based off anyone from Captain Underpants is automatically vetoed.
** This goes double when the genre of the game is actually superheroes.

*Breaking the 4th wall within the 1st 50 posts will be considered bad taste
**What do you mean you honestly consider the DM the Divine Master? You really expect me to believe that?

*If I am more evil than the BBEG something is wrong.
**Especially if I prove a more effective BBEG.
***I am to avoid leading barbarous hordes to conquer all that is good when I was supposed to be a hero.

*If at any time my BBEG proves to be more likeable than some of the party members, I should probably tone down the Affably Evil a bit.

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Originally Posted by Loxagn

*If at any time my BBEG proves to be more likeable than some of the party members, I should probably tone down the Affably Evil a bit.

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In my experience it means the party needs to tone down the selfishness and psychopathy. :smalltongue: