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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Arachu
First off, *hugs*.
Second, you're Demisexual - 'technically straight' or not, you're definitely LGBT+. It's pretty messed-up that that survey overlooked you (and Nope for that matter, but at least he isn't European).
Clearly, we need to make asterisk-shaped LED's. What do you mean, "eye strain"? :smallconfused: :smalltongue:
*Hugs* I can understand how frustrating that is for both of you. :/
~Bianca
Now your post is finished. Your specialness should not be forgotten, just like I put a personal line in my signature about a week after joining. For relevance. You are special, and B(P)/T
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
supernerd
~Bianca
Now your post is finished. Your specialness should not be forgotten, just like I put a personal line in my signature about a week after joining. For relevance. You are special, and B(P)/T
I... Thanks. I didn't realize I'd forgotten it. :smallsmile:
(I edited it in now that you mentioned it. *hugs*)
~Bianca
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
noparlpf
*snip*
>:|
Edit: Well I guess I shouldn't feel too bad because I don't even live in the EU.
Are they excluding bi people as well? Because if they exclude bi people who are primarily hetero in deed, that would be... :smallmad:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Carecalmo
Oh, wow. I did not enjoy that survey at all. :(!
Emotional rant ahead: (spoilered due to content related to sexual assault and difficult stuff)
Spoiler
Show
At one point there's a bunch of questions regarding the most serious physical or sexual assault that's happened to you in the past five years.
I was the victim of a sexual assault some years ago, and being asked a bunch of questions about the situation (and the offender (and how I handled it)) by a machine survey has shaken me pretty badly. :smallfrown:
The worst part is, I can't help but feel that I'm being too sensitive about it and am being selfish for wishing they had put some kind of trigger warning up before.
Except that there really is no being too sensitive about this. Or at least, it is obvious that it stirred up a whole lot of bad feelings and I have to acknowledge them now I'm aware of them.
I guess they decided not to include a "skip this if it makes you uncomfortable"-button for practical reasons, but that doesn't really prevent me from feeling weird now.
I guess what I can take with me from the survey is that I'm not done working with it. Complicated. *sigh*
Of course, it doesn't help that the assault has been surfacing the past few weeks due to a guy I met in a bar who wanted me to be more... assertive in our .. conversation - and that started a lot of thoughts about power, powerlessness and how I feel about my body and other people. Kind of hard to talk about in polite company, but I hope I haven't stepped on anyone's toes.
And I really needed to get this off my chest.
Also.
Hello! I guess it's been.. months? since I posted here. *waves*
I've been lurking a bit, though. You're still pretty swell. :)
It's SPRING in Denmark, and aside from days with pouring rain, time for wearing short shorts and reading books outside. Book reading is, of course, mainly a front for looking at cute guys in short shorts.
*Hugs*
That's terrible. ;_;
I hope things will be much brighter for you very soon, especially if it's Spring in your part of Denmark. :smallsmile:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
Indeed we are! Welcome to LGBTAitp, Lix has the cookies, but we all give *Hugs!* ^_^
That meanie. :smallmad::smalltongue:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
golentan
Are they excluding bi people as well? Because if they exclude bi people who are primarily hetero in deed, that would be... :smallmad:
Bisexuality were one of the things it specifically included, so it's both odd and terribly sad if it excludes everybody with primarily heterosexual experiences. ;_;
EDIT: *Hugs Triscuitable and Nope too*
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
CWater! *glomp*
How's life in our old colonies? :smalltongue:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Thanks everybody. I was so exhausted from thinking (and talking) about it all that I fell asleep with all my clothes on. Did catch the first few hugs sent my way and they warmed me in my dreams. Waking up to more isn't bad either. :smallsmile:
Now, to contact my therapist..
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Arachu
First off, *hugs*.
Clearly, we need to make asterisk-shaped LED's. What do you mean, "eye strain"? :smallconfused: :smalltongue:
Yes! Now I'm imagining people running around with huge asterisk-shaped lamps in their hands, giving *hugs* and living in utopia. For it would be a step on the way there.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
noparlpf
I'm really sorry, I think I recognise your name, but I don't remember you well. Would you mind reintroducing yourself?
Sure!
Ahem. I'm Carecalmo! Pretty gay in the sexuality continuum, don't really know where I fit in genderwise. Right on the edge of genderqueer, perhaps? I just think that men should wear more cheap lipstick. And everybody should disguise themselves more.
Also male! My avatar can be a bit misleading, but I like to think I'm showing off a pretty male jawline there.
Also single and attractive and fond of wearing short shorts. :smallwink::smallbiggrin:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Keveak
I hope things will be much brighter for you very soon, especially if it's Spring in your part of Denmark. :smallsmile:
I woke up to the sun shining on my face! That means Spring, right? IIRC, we're both in Copenhagen, but I spent Easter building a cottages in the woods with my father in the country, so that may account for me feeling particularly springy.
And hello CWater! Due to being tired, I first parsed your post as
"I gather asexuals | [Am I] allowed here? :)"
And I think as long as you're gathering them for something good, like showering people with cupcakes and flowers, you're welcome! On second reading, you're also welcome. :smallbiggrin: *hugs*
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Hey new folks! *hugs the new additions to The Collective*
I'm curious about something - is asexuality more common in men or women?
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Carecalmo
Oh, wow. I did not enjoy that survey at all. :(!
Emotional rant ahead: (spoilered due to content related to sexual assault and difficult stuff)
... oh boy. I'm so sorry about it :smalleek:
Quote:
Also.
Hello! I guess it's been.. months? since I posted here. *waves*
I've been lurking a bit, though. You're still pretty swell. :)
Hi! I don't think I've seen you already. Nice to meet you!
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Arachu
*Hugs!* Okay, now that I know the survey's like that I just flat-out disapprove of it. :smallannoyed:
~Bianca
Same. It's important to gather data on such aggression, but they really need to do it in such a way that will respect victims/targets/survivors. :smallannoyed:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Arachu
Second, you're Demisexual - 'technically straight' or not, you're definitely LGBT+. It's pretty messed-up that that survey overlooked you (and Nope for that matter, but at least he isn't European).
... thanks for telling me that. I was wondering if I was just an ally taking an obscure label to look special. (The fact that it bothered me is itself quite silly, and probably a sign of privilege. Should work on that.) :smallsmile:
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
Of course! Welcome here. :smallsmile:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
Well, that's why you have to teach it. :smallsmile:
P.S. HI!
and HI to the other new people as well. You all seem great.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Arachu
I... Thanks. I didn't realize I'd forgotten it. :smallsmile:
(I edited it in now that you mentioned it. *hugs*)
~Bianca
Your welcome! *hugs*
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
Well they're some of the most fun people around!
That computer needs to be backed up, wiped, reprogrammed, and then given back all its files.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Carecalmo
Thanks everybody. I was so exhausted from thinking (and talking) about it all that I fell asleep with all my clothes on. Did catch the first few hugs sent my way and they warmed me in my dreams. Waking up to more isn't bad either. :smallsmile:
*more hugs*
Quote:
Sure!
Ahem. I'm Carecalmo! Pretty gay in the sexuality continuum, don't really know where I fit in genderwise. Right on the edge of genderqueer, perhaps? I just think that men should wear more cheap lipstick. And everybody should disguise themselves more.
Also male! My avatar can be a bit misleading, but I like to think I'm showing off a pretty male jawline there.
Also single and attractive and fond of wearing short shorts. :smallwink::smallbiggrin:
now I'm curious... Has this thread ever springboarded a relationship?
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Musashi
... thanks for telling me that. I was wondering if I was just an ally taking an obscure label to look special. (The fact that it bothered me is itself quite silly, and probably a sign of privilege. Should work on that.) :smallsmile:
Hey, I've only recently accepted that I have the right to call myself trans.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
supernerd
now I'm curious... Has this thread ever springboarded a relationship?
Does Skeppers and Birchgrove count?
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Heliomance
Does Skeppers and Birchgrove count?
I'm not sure... But I do remember hearing about that. Sounds like a fun time!
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
supernerd
I'm not sure... But I do remember hearing about that. Sounds like a fun time!
The boards' second cutest couple, after BlueMoon.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Heliomance
Does Skeppers and Birchgrove count?
Sort of, maybe, I dunno? :smallredface::smalltongue:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Heliomance
The boards' second cutest couple, after BlueMoon.
BlueMoon and who? Or was there some sort of wackiness that made it possible for them to be in a relationship with... Bleh, what's the gender-neutral term for 'him/herself'? 'Themself' doesn't look right, and it gets redlined...
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
C'nor
BlueMoon and who? Or was there some sort of wackiness that made it possible for them to be in a relationship with... Bleh, what's the gender-neutral term for 'him/herself'? 'Themself' doesn't look right, and it gets redlined...
Blue Ghost and MoonCat. :smalltongue:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Skeppio
Blue Ghost and MoonCat. :smalltongue:
Oh... I really should have gotten that that was a compound name, shouldn't I? :smallredface:
In any case, thanks for clearing up my confusion!
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Musashi
I don't think it's a glitch, it basically thanked me for wanting to take the survey but that I wasn't part of the target group. I just tried again, saying I didn't know who I was attracted to this time, and I still won't go further.
*shrugs* It's no big deal for me. I barely qualify as an LGBT+ individual, if at all, anyway.
Oh, by the way, I took the test in French (it being my first language), but I don't think it had an influence on the rest... did it?
Aww, don't say that. You're very much a part of our little LGBT+ community we have here~
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Carecalmo
Oh, wow. I did not enjoy that survey at all. :(!
Emotional rant ahead: (spoilered due to content related to sexual assault and difficult stuff)
Spoiler
Show
At one point there's a bunch of questions regarding the most serious physical or sexual assault that's happened to you in the past five years.
I was the victim of a sexual assault some years ago, and being asked a bunch of questions about the situation (and the offender (and how I handled it)) by a machine survey has shaken me pretty badly. :smallfrown:
The worst part is, I can't help but feel that I'm being too sensitive about it and am being selfish for wishing they had put some kind of trigger warning up before.
Except that there really is no being too sensitive about this. Or at least, it is obvious that it stirred up a whole lot of bad feelings and I have to acknowledge them now I'm aware of them.
I guess they decided not to include a "skip this if it makes you uncomfortable"-button for practical reasons, but that doesn't really prevent me from feeling weird now.
I guess what I can take with me from the survey is that I'm not done working with it. Complicated. *sigh*
Of course, it doesn't help that the assault has been surfacing the past few weeks due to a guy I met in a bar who wanted me to be more... assertive in our .. conversation - and that started a lot of thoughts about power, powerlessness and how I feel about my body and other people. Kind of hard to talk about in polite company, but I hope I haven't stepped on anyone's toes.
And I really needed to get this off my chest.
Also.
Hello! I guess it's been.. months? since I posted here. *waves*
I've been lurking a bit, though. You're still pretty swell. :)
It's SPRING in Denmark, and aside from days with pouring rain, time for wearing short shorts and reading books outside. Book reading is, of course, mainly a front for looking at cute guys in short shorts.
*hugs, sympathies, cookies and whatever you want*
Also, hi again~
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
Them silly computers.
Hi~
Quote:
Originally Posted by
C'nor
BlueMoon and who? Or was there some sort of wackiness that made it possible for them to be in a relationship with... Bleh, what's the gender-neutral term for 'him/herself'? 'Themself' doesn't look right, and it gets redlined...
"Themselves" works.
-----
Lena's linkies:
Something that really rings true considering the sort of arguments I've had about certain things. (It's sarcastic.)
Oh, and some random adorableness.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Astrella
*squee*
And I thought my heart was too cold and desolate to be affected by such simple things. :smallsmile:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Astrella
Awww, that's so sweet! :smallsmile:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
pffh
Spoiler
Show
Yup those are those books
And now for something that (shock and horror) is actually on topic for the thread:
Over the last few weeks (months? possible but not sure) I've been feeling more and more well gay. Not that I've been acting like a stereotypical gay man but my something (longing possibly? attraction? I don't know words are hard!) and it's been bothering me for a while and I'm not happy about it.
One of the reason I'm not happy about it is because I'm bi and not gay and have always leaned more towards women. In fact I've always leaned so much towards women that I've been convinced most of my life that I was straight because I had no problem completely ignoring everything else.
Another reason is that I don't actually know anyone that isn't straight so I haven't really I guess talked with anyone about anything and haven't really done anything about it other then a few measly attempts at going to a gay bar alone (oh god going to bars alone is sooooo boring).
Also I'm allowed to be irrationally annoyed at myself. :smallmad:
*tries to hug*
I could be wrong, but that sounds like some kinda sexual orientation fluidity thingamajig. I get that too, and find it annoying as heck personally. Sudden, irregular & variable changes = not fun.
There any gay bars around that you can take non-lgbt friends into? They must exist, or else there wouldn't be so many complaints about accompanying straight friends trying to hit on the wrong targets...or girls who go in to dodge the flirts.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
supernerd
I'm not sure... But I do remember hearing about that. Sounds like a fun time!
The fun times is somewhat curtailed by them living on opposite sides of the globe.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
If I ever win a sufficiently large amount of money on a scratchcard, one of the first things I will do is buy one of them a plane ticket to see the other one for a month. I really mean this.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
They should make a Kickstarter project. I'd chip in (not much - I'm poor) but only if Skeppio comes to Sweden so I can meet her.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
golentan
Are they excluding bi people as well? Because if they exclude bi people who are primarily hetero in deed, that would be... :smallmad:
It specifically mentioned bisexual people as part of the target group.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Astrella
Lena's linkies:
Something that really rings true considering the sort of arguments I've had about certain things. (It's sarcastic.)
Oh, and some random
adorableness.
Yup.
Also that is quite adorable.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Asta Kask
They should make a Kickstarter project. I'd chip in (not much - I'm poor) but only if Skeppio comes to Sweden so I can meet her.
From the Kickstarter guidelines:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kickstarter guidelines
No "fund my life" projects. Examples include projects to pay tuition or bills, go on vacation, or buy a new camera.
I don't think it'd be a good idea...sorry. :smallfrown:
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
Everyone forgets about Lena and Ashby and I. :smalltongue:
~ ♅
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
[
Oh, and some random adorableness.[/QUOTE]
Well that made my day.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
CWater
Hi! I gather asexuals are allowed here :smallsmile:
...My computer doesn't recognize asexual as a word, how rude!:smallannoyed::smalltongue:
Hi! Hope you have fun in our corner of the playground
An you can add it as a word thou IDK
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Carecalmo
Thanks everybody. I was so exhausted from thinking (and talking) about it all that I fell asleep with all my clothes on. Did catch the first few hugs sent my way and they warmed me in my dreams. Waking up to more isn't bad either. :smallsmile:
Glad we made you feel better
Now, to contact my therapist..
Yes! Now I'm imagining people running around with huge asterisk-shaped lamps in their hands, giving *hugs* and living in utopia. For it would be a step on the way there.
Yes!
Sure!
Ahem. I'm Carecalmo! Pretty gay in the sexuality continuum, don't really know where I fit in genderwise. Right on the edge of genderqueer, perhaps? I just think that men should wear more cheap lipstick. And everybody should disguise themselves more.
Also male! My avatar can be a bit misleading, but I like to think I'm showing off a pretty male jawline there.
Also single and attractive and fond of wearing short shorts. :smallwink::smallbiggrin:
Re-hi! Now if I only lived in Denmark...:smallwink:
I woke up to the sun shining on my face! That means Spring, right? IIRC, we're both in Copenhagen, but I spent Easter building a cottages in the woods with my father in the country, so that may account for me feeling particularly springy.
And hello CWater! Due to being tired, I first parsed your post as
"I gather asexuals | [Am I] allowed here? :)"
And I think as long as you're gathering them for something good, like showering people with cupcakes and flowers, you're welcome! On second reading, you're also welcome. :smallbiggrin: *hugs*
Quote:
Originally Posted by
The Succubus
Hey new folks! *hugs the new additions to The Collective*
Dont make it sound like some sort of cult. They have a way of ending badly!
I'm curious about something - is asexuality more common in men or women?
I have to google it...... Best I can find. From a Yahoo anwser source.
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Re: LGBTAitP - Part 22: The Best There Is
I have a feeling asexuality is more common in women, if only because such terms as "frigidity" are almost exclusively applied to them and might just be a misunderstanding of asexuality.
Then again, the general dynamics between men and women being what they are, that alone can't be considered a reliable clue. I mean by this that women are supposed to be gatekeepers, that they are considered prostitutes if they have a noticeable libido BUT that they're also called [REDACTED] if they withhold sex from their male partner, that men are supposed to always want to have sex with men/women/everyone (?!), and that a man who doesn't or who is not particularly good at it is either inexperienced, ill or old, that anyone who hasn't had sex past age 21 is considered creepy or untouchable, and that there's such a thing as peer pressure....
*breathes again*
That's a lot of things to study in relation to asexuality. :smallyuk: