Johan and the Gnolls
This story starts as all of the great ones do; once upon a time there was a little boy. He would grow into a large boy and then a man, in time, but for now we care with only his young self. They called the boy Johan, and Johan was the son of a blacksmith. As you must be thinking, “not a very illustrious position,” and “why would such a lowly person be the subject of our story?” Well, Johan would not stay a young boy for long, and in time grew to be the greatest man in his land. But when he was young, Johan was bullied and picked on. He grew up in a small village outside of the royal lands surrounding the capitol. He was slight, and a rather thin boy. The other children in his village would thrash him mightily, and seeing as his mother had died many years ago, he had no one to go to. His father would look at him and give him a pitying look, and say that he should deal with his problems himself. He felt constantly alone, and would spend much of his time in the woods, quietly crying. It is there that we find him on this day.
The woods were full of terrible monsters, so Johan would hide in the trees, high up away from where any of them could touch him, afraid but preferring the danger to his life in the village. The animals of the forest would find him and play with him. He found it much more comforting than the squalid squeals of the town children. The animals instinctively loved . It just so happened that there was a fearsome band of gnolls who were terrorizing the village in which Johan lived. They would come every week, and demand food and money, or else they would slaughter the whole village. There was no doubt in any of the villager’s minds that they would easily be able to kill them all. Of course, they would come at midday, the exact time when Johan wanted least to be in town, near the other children. He never saw the gnolls, and was otherwise completely unaware they existed.
The day that we come upon is the fast day, and all of the villagers were in the church, praying and fasting. Johan would not step a foot inside the church, for that is where his mother died. He stayed in the woods that day, away from the general stillness and silence of the town. It is in the woods that he came upon a seemingly abandoned camp. The fire had been recently stamped out, and although the sun was still low in the sky, there were signs that the occupants of the camp had been drinking. Johan was wary, and heard the crashing in the underbrush several minutes before it actually came upon the camp, and was able to climb into the trees. He found a nest of squirrels and a sparrow living up in the tree, and started to play with them while watching the camp below. The gnolls, a creature that Johan had previously never seen came into the camp, all uproariously drunk except for what Johan thought was the leader. He was tall, silver-haired, and hideously scarred. His right eye was cut out, and not even covered. His visage was horrifying, but what unnerved Johan was the way that he casually leaned back against a tree, next to the corpse of some large woodland creature, inefficiently butchered and lain bloody against the tree, and how he held the creature’s head, examining it with precise and vicious eyes.
It was with those eyes that Johan was spotted. The leader looked up to the tree, and growled something long and low before looking away quickly. Johan assumed that he was looking at something lower on the tree, right until he was forcibly pulled from the tree. They threw him on the ground, and were about to stab him when the leader held up his hands. There was an instant hush that settled around the monsters. The leader pulled a dagger, and advanced towards the little boy, cleaning his fingernails with the dagger, the blade easily twice as long as Johan’s face. The gnoll licked the blade and the rubbed the spittle onto Johan’s face. He sniffed the red flesh of Johan’s bruised face which had been struck upon falling from the tree. He shuddered slightly at the smell, either of pleasure or horror, Johan could not tell.
“I know what you want,” said Johan, his voice cracking and stuttering from fear.
“Do you, little boy?” The gnoll’s breath smelled like raw garlic and blood.
“Y-you w-want to eat me, a-and th-then kill all of the p-people in the v-village.”
The gnoll laughed. “No, the current arrangement is far too lucrative for anything so vulgar. We simply want a little added element of... terror added to your little hamlet. We will burn the church at sundown, kill the priest, maybe a few townsfolk too, if we get hungry. But first we have to remove one little problem element...” The gnoll shouted at the others, and they lifted up a great big pot, and set it over the fire that had been stoked while Johan wasn’t watching. The pot was filled with stream water, a few fish live fish (presumably from the stream, gnolls aren’t exactly the most discerning of creatures), some carrots, onions, and a huge pile of salt. They were making a stew of him.
As is par for the course for gnolls, they had forgotten one key element. In the excitement to boil the little boy stew and get some good grub before they went to burn the church, they did not look around for spies. The squirrel and birds that Johan had been playing with watched the whole scene with trepidation. They knew the blood thirst of the gnolls, and the hunger that drives many of their schemes, and knew they would need help. They went to the gathering place of the animals, and called the badger, the owl, the fox, the fieldmouse, and the deer.
“What are we doing here?” asked the badger. He was in the middle of his midday-nap, and had no patience for idle chatter.
“It looks like squirrel and sparrow have some news for us, badger, so why don’t you just sit down on that slick little rump of yours and listen to what they have to say,” said fox. He was smooth and sly, and none of the other animals really liked him. Johan had found him funny and interesting, and had become quick friends.
Squirrel and sparrow were panting, and they had to wait a few seconds to get their breath back before they could tell the animals of the events in the camp. “Some... gnolls... took Johan... boil... stew...” Squirrel managed to squeak out.
“The gnolls are making stew with Johan? I thought gnolls hated humans?” said fieldmouse. She was not altogether that smart, and took many of her ques from squirrel, who was her close friend.
“No, dummy, Johan is making a stew out of gnolls. And good for him, too, I say! Those gnolls are quite mean, and they deserve what they get.” Said deer. She was quite self-sure, and thought she always knew right.
“Shush, all of you! We must let them speak and hear what they have to say.” Shouted owl. Owl was patient and wise, and knew that squabbling could only take up more time that was precious if their friend was in trouble.
“The gnolls... have taken Johan... and are boiling him into a stew. We must.. hurry!” Sparrow gasped, and then fell onto the forest floor, dead tired from their flight over, fast asleep.
The animals went as quick as they could to the camp where Johan was. They found the gnolls still fussing with the pot, but some of them, including the leader, were gone. They had no way of defeating the gnolls still there, but they could see that Johan was still alive. Fox flipped into the clearing, ran up to one of the gnolls still in the clearing, and scratched him on the face, slicing through his eyes. The gnoll screamed, and started thrashing, trying to hit the fox. The gnolls, not being very smart creatures, leaped up and started chasing the fox around. The fox ran circles around them, and led them out of the clearing. The badger and deer tried tipping the cauldron over, but it was too heavy. The fieldmouse jumped up on the cauldron, and starting splashing water on the flames. Although she could only get a little bit of water onto the flames, they hissed and sizzled, and the other animals realized what they had to do. The badger helped the deer up onto the pot, and the deer took a deep mouthful, and sprayed it onto the fire. It immediately went out.
Johan stumbled out of the pot, and upon seeing his animal friends, cried out joyously. He thanked each of them personally, and then asked where fox was. The other animals confessed that the fox had led the other gnolls away.
“Oh no! I hope he is okay,” shouted Johan, grabbing his drenched head and casting his eyes downward.
“Don’t worry, Johan, I am sure he will be fine. None can outfox the fox. In the meantime, aren’t you forgetting something?” Said the owl. When Johan looked at him with confusion, he continued, “What happened to the other gnolls?” Johan jumped up with fright upon remembering that the gnolls had said that they were heading towards the town to burn the church down.
“Oh no! We have to stop them!” He cried.
The owl nodded his beak, and flew over to Johan, picking him up gently with his claws. He lifted him clear over the trees, and took him to the town. They saw the rampaging gnolls heading through the forest, and flew past. The owl dropped Johan off in the town, and told him to let the townspeople know.
“But what can they do? There is no guard, and no one to stop the gnolls!”
“You will have to think of something.” The owl touched Johan’s forehead with his beak, and flew off to the forest. Johan stood in the center of town, thinking.
When the gnolls arrived in the village, they were surprised to find the townspeople having a feast right in the center of town. There were luscious steaks, pounds upon pounds of potatoes and carrots, glazed with sugar and honey, and huge roasts of pork and chicken. A barrel of cider had been pulled out of the church cellar and brought to the table, where it was on tap for all to drink. The table of the feast had quite a few seats open, and the villagers quickly offered the seats to the gnolls, who were understandably famished. The leader was wary, but at the insistance of his men and of the townsfolk, he sat at the table.
The gnolls tucked in, eating quite a lot more than the villagers. While the gnolls were eating, Johan and the squirrel were running around under the tables, and tying their feet to the chairs. When the gnolls finished, and began to try to extort more from the village, the sparrow and the owl started pecking out their eyes.
Johan, after driving off the gnolls, was held in universal esteem. The whole village treated him like a hero, and the children all wanted to play with him. However, he remembered their slights and threats, and knew better than to try to be friends with people such as them. He stayed in the forest with his animal friends.
While the gnolls were unable to see, the villagers deposited them on the outskirts of town and sent them off on their way. The gnolls were robbed and stolen from, eventually reaching the head of the Bandit King’s lands, in the Bracken. They told the Bandit King of the young boy’s actions, and the Bandit King found himself intrigued. However, that is a story for another day, and another time. You children behave yourselves, and I might tell that story tomorrow. Now, the story is over and the hero has made the day better, and it is time for us to go to bed, for sleep is fleeting, and I am in need of a good solid mattress if I am to continue telling stories.