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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* My backstory does not include destroying an entire pantheon.
* My backstory does not include causing Atlantis to sink.
* My backstory does not include burning down eighteen villages.
* My backstory does not include permanently backing up the sewers of a major city.
*The DM will write my backstory.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* The lightning rail conductor is not Claire Stanfield
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
ClothedInVelvet
**** If you make a Use Rope check, you have to make sure a safety word is specified.
***** 'What is love' will not be accepted.
* The verbal component for Telekinesis is not 'The power.... to move you'
* you do not need to burn every corpse just in case they're a Polymorphed Troll
** Nor is there any need to burn them 'in case there's any wandering Necromancers around'
*** Raising the corpses as undead yourself before said hypothetical Necromancer can do it, therefor keeping them under your (and indirectly, your party) control instead of some random NPC is still an Evil act.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Crafty Cultist
* The lightning rail conductor is not Claire Stanfield
** Unless I make too much trouble on the train.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*My character cannot be the Lone Wanderer and The Courier.
**Fine, he can. But he can't focus on any weapon skills.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*no I may not have a rod of lordly might
*If I have one I'm not a lord of rodly might
*no, the rod is not, I reapeat, not a metaphor...
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Jumping at the paladin will not convince him to let you accompany him on his travels.
**If he has to repeatedly hit you in the head with his shield so you stop scaring him, he will not fall, because that counts as self-defense.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* My fighter does not move at the speed of sword.
** My warblade using Time Stands Still does, but I may not actually say so.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Because he was getting uppity with me is not a valid excuse for my actions.
**No one is getting uppity with me.
***Lack of respect is no reason to unleash the fairy super beast on the fairies.
****Not allowed to enslave the fairy super beast and order it to go grocery shopping.
*****Fine I'm allowed to make it fight the tarrasque but only because it would be awesome.
******I am allowed to use my leadership feat and bard spells to enlist the homeless I can not use my vast wealth to arm them to the teeth.
*******I do not merely have to wink three times to unleash my homeless man army.
********I can not say the cleric was forced to close the door of a small hole on the grounds that I made it into my new home. (message me if you want a background on that bad boy and if you aren't let me add a subsection to the rule.)
I must accept the fact that I am now shrapnel.
********* Not allowed to use the threat that I will turn back into shrapnel but I probably will anyways.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* When encountering the BBEG, I may not chalange him to a Ham-off to decide who is the real villain here
** If I do make the BEG submit, I may not take his place and dump said BBEG on the party
** My PC's motivation for joining the party cannot be that the BBEG isn't villainy enough and needs to be replaced
* The party paladin does not apreciate my plan to stop the bandits if it involves a citysworth of casualties
** Or opening a gate to hell beneath them does not work either
** inding solars to commit said mass murder/opening the gate to hell does not make it any less "evil"
** The party paladin is not secretly begging me for a quick Morality Unbound, nor is he secretly supportive of my evil
** I cannot use the paladin as ammunition in a seige.
** This cannot be because his average damage and survivability are far to low to make it worth it
** If I point that out I will get smoten. multiple times.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BlackestOfMages
** I cannot use the paladin as ammunition in a seige.
** This cannot be because his average damage and survivability are far to low to make it worth it
** If I point that out I will get smoten. multiple times.
*The party Barbarian is also forbidden ammunition.
**Okay, if he asks for it, fire away.
***Complaining of boredom is not asking for it.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*As a Hulking Hurler, may not use other party members as weapons without their permission
**Just because the rogue gave me permission does not mean that I can throw the wizard
*May not have a siege crossbow as my main weapon
**Especially if it's used to remove doors from their frames, their houses and the world of objects larger than a matchstick.
***Especially if the only safe place to be when it is used is a hundred feet or more behind the user
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ksheep
*As a Hulking Hurler, may not use other party members as weapons without their permission
**Just because the rogue gave me permission does not mean that I can throw the wizard
*May not have a siege crossbow as my main weapon
**Especially if it's used to remove doors from their frames, their houses and the world of objects larger than a matchstick.
***Especially if the only safe place to be when it is used is a hundred feet or more behind the user
So in other words, can't play Detritus from Discworld
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Cannot play a Discworld troll.
*No more starting the space age before the industrial or even the renaissance ages begin.
*I am not the God Emperor of the Imperium of Dwarf/Hadozee/Gnome/Man/Half-Elf/Awakened Baboon.
*STOP. ROLLING. MONKEY CHARACTERS.
*Apes, hadozee, chimps, and other monkeyish primates count.
*My rat catcher's dog did NOT just rip off a greater daemon's head, no matter what the rolls say.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* my warforged bard does not have "hextech sub-woofer" as a body feature, nor can he take ranks in Perform (Dubstep)
* No, not even if "Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites" fits the campaign theme
* My kobold paladin does not worship Pun Pun
* My mount can not "crazy ivan"
* nor can it "sonic rainboom", even if it is a pegasus.
* Sadly, I cannot iron heart surge Murphy's Law
*when an enemy fumbles on an itenerative attack, I may not yell "C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER"
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
{{scrubbed}}
*If my alchemist makes an extract of greater invisibility, this does not entitle him to go bat**** crazy as soon as he quaffs it.
*Strength mutagens will not atrophy my genitals.
* Potions of flight will *get* you high up, they will not *make* you high.
*It has been made abundantly clear that no, your alchemist cannot quit any time he wants.
*Even if there are rules for it, cannot make a hwacha.
*Especially cannot fill it entirely with wands.
* Am not to use animate object on siege weaponry.
* or on the traps in my secret volcano lair.
{{scrubbed}}
*Our mouseguards are not to have the goal ‘Raft all our enemies”
*Particularly if I actually go through with it and make a raft out of the shrike we just killed.
* While using the action cards given, cannot play the attack card in face-up position.
* Or the defend card, in face down position.
{{scrubbed}}
*Cannot play a mouse with 5 ranks in pathfinder and zero in scout.
*Especially if it’s a sailor.
*Not to have both a monocle AND an eyepatch, even it would sorta make sense.
*Using a fishing hook as a grappling hook is okay in mouseguard, and ONLY mouseguard, size categories be dammed.
* If one player gets a bonus skillpoint for quacking while using duckwise, that does not mean I get a bonus skillpoint for clacking every time I use crabwise.
*Even if it is an injoke/meme, screaming out “CRAAAAAAAB” will likewise not give me this bonus.
* Heroically posing, with arms folded and my cape flapping in the non-existent wind it to be kept at a maximum of once/session.
*Just because journeys are resolved through the conflict mechanics does not mean I can claim I have slain the weather with a cunning feint.
*…Cannot heroically pose atop the weather.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
*Any organic characters must be male or female, and do not have the gender option of “neither”
** May not play a mind flayer, beholder or nematode just to get around this rule.
***My mind flayer character can not force will saves against insanity or blindness by flashing people.
*No using control winds and control weather just to create good conditions to pose in.
*The half orc barbarian with 6 int cannot invent a camera of any kind to take pictures of said poses.
*Even if my half orc barbarian has high cha to boost his intimidate checks, I cannot be a beauty queen.
Thog too pretty for jail!
*The party rogue did not once dream of being a masseuse.
*No matter how friendly my character is, I cannot point out that the mugger's form is all wrong and proceed to give him tips.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* I may not begin each encounter with the words "R-E-A-D-Y FIGHT!"
** Administering a Coup De Graz to a fallen opponent is not to be preluded by the words "FINISH HIM"
***nor may my charecter claim this as his catchphrase if he is Finnish
*My charecter's first name is not Leroy
*His last name is not Jenkins
*Nor is it Gibbs
*Summon instrument does not permit my bard to drop pianos on his enemies
**tubas and drumsets are also right out.
***NO! even if it is a part of the 1812 Overature as written, a cannon is not a musical instrument.
*Due to my engineering experiance and the resulting methodology of problemsolving that I appy, I may no longer play any of the folowing classes
Wizard
Sourceror
Bard
Druid
Cleric
Psionic
Paladin
Commoner
Warlock
Anything else with magic or psyonics
*Physics (applied or theoretical), calculus, chemistry, Engineering (all disciplines), and Biology textbooks are no longer permitted at a gaming session.
*if my plan involves more than two greek letters, No.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
eulmanis12
* I may not begin each encounter with the words "R-E-A-D-Y FIGHT!"
** Administering a Coup De Graz to a fallen opponent is not to be preluded by the words "FINISH HIM"
***nor may my charecter claim this as his catchphrase if he is Finnish
*My charecter's first name is not Leroy
*His last name is not Jenkins
*Nor is it Gibbs
*Summon instrument does not permit my bard to drop pianos on his enemies
**tubas and drumsets are also right out.
***NO! even if it is a part of the 1812 Overature as written, a cannon is not a musical instrument.
*Due to my engineering experiance and the resulting methodology of problemsolving that I appy, I may no longer play any of the folowing classes
Wizard
Sourceror
Bard
Druid
Cleric
Psionic
Paladin
Commoner
Warlock
Anything else with magic or psyonics
*Physics (applied or theoretical), calculus, chemistry, Engineering (all disciplines), and Biology textbooks are no longer permitted at a gaming session.
*if my plan involves more than two greek letters, No.
play something form TOB and/or incarnum :smallamused:
anyway,
*I may not use the social skills in such a way that i end the campaign without a single combat taking place, even if that's what my character would do...
* That's it, i am hereby officially forbidden to utilise diplomacy if i have a total modifier of +10
*Yes, this is my last chance of every using diplomacy again...
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Randomguy
** May not play a mind flayer, beholder or nematode just to get around this rule.
***My mind flayer character can not force will saves against insanity or blindness by flashing people.
****May not get a symbol of insanity as a tattoo to get around this rule.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I am not to play a lightning mage called cole mcrath.
*A shapeshifter ranger named alex mercer is worse.
*Blitzcrank the warforged is right out.
*NO MORE VIEDO GAME CHARACTERS!
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*My Knight has never been to an Electric Castle.
**Nor has my Barbarian.
If you got that without looking it up, you're awesome. :smallbiggrin:
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*For the last time, the paladin's special mount is not Pinkie Pie
**Nor is it Applejack
***Even if you can make the case that she would be LG
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Doorhandle
*Just because journeys are resolved through the conflict mechanics does not mean I can claim I have slain the weather with a cunning feint.
Of course not. Feints don't do any damage.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Alabenson
Applejack
*May not use "y'all" as a singular pronoun if the DM grew up in the South.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
If the DM says that this is just set-up story for everything else so we don't need to roll anything yet, that does not mean kill the BBEG as soon as you see him.
If I try this, I have to allow him to get away somehow.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Sgt. Cookie
*My Knight has never been to an Electric Castle.
**Nor has my Barbarian.
If you got that without looking it up, you're awesome. :smallbiggrin:
**Nor have they needed to choose between two gates
**The first one was not plain and old, and the second was not forged of gold
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* My characters can never (again) have the ability to perform ventriloquism by any means.
* My half-orc barbarian is not allowed to rename the paladin's horse "Breakfast" (or any other meal or food reference).
* Just because dismembering the big-bad-evil-guy, burning each part in a separate fire, mixing the ashes from each part into a separate block of cement, and dropping each block of cement into different oceans is "the only way to be sure", doesn't mean it's necessary.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Kerrin
* Just because dismembering the big-bad-evil-guy, burning each part in a separate fire, mixing the ashes from each part into a separate block of cement, and dropping each block of cement into different oceans is "the only way to be sure", doesn't mean it's necessary.
**If it is actually neccessary, I will not defer doing so for budget reasons.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* My ranger's animal companion is not a dinozord.
* My ranger's animal companion is not a thunderzord.
* My ranger's animal companion is not a ninjazord.
* My ranger's animal companion is not a shogunzord.
* I may no longer play a ranger.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* May not role-play myself out of the party during the first session… and the second session… and the third session… and twice during the fourth session.
** May not have more than 2 replacement characters already rolled up, ready to play at a moment's notice.
*** Especially when I know that there won't be any encounters this session.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Jay R
* My ranger's animal companion is not a dinozord.
* My ranger's animal companion is not a thunderzord.
* My ranger's animal companion is not a ninjazord.
* My ranger's animal companion is not a shogunzord.
* I may no longer play a ranger.
*druid is right out
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
blackjack217
*druid is right out
I read that as "My ranger's animal companion is not a druid". It was better that way.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Randomguy
I read that as "My ranger's animal companion is not a druid". It was better that way.
I agree completely.
*If a campaign begins with a mob of skeletons attacking civilians, I am supposed to kill the skeletons with minimum civilian casualties, not vice versa.
*I am not to prepare only fire-based spells when we are attacking the temple of the goddess of fire.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dimonite
I agree completely.
*If a campaign begins with a mob of skeletons attacking civilians, I am supposed to kill the skeletons with minimum civilian casualties, not vice versa.
*I am not to prepare only fire-based spells when we are attacking the temple of the goddess of fire.
*Backburning does not work on fire elementals.
*Running one over with a fire truck would work, but that is not why you have to start the fire department.
* There is no such thing as a magically enchanted fire extinguisher.
*This also applies to toasters, and I am not to use one as a meteor hammer.
* Unless it's made of starmetal, cannot use meteors as hammers either.
* While we have already gone over the wielding of natural weapons, it is nerveless appropriate to say that our mouse-guards EPCIALLAY cannot take advantage of this.
*Our cleric cannot be multidenominational.
* The flying spagetti monster is not part of the pantheon.
* Neither is Vesta.
* Especially if you take the domains 'hearth and home' and twist them into the single domain "arson."
*Sun wukong may be part of A pantheon, but you still can't worship him.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Doorhandle
* The flying spagetti monster is not part of the pantheon.
* Neither is Vesta.
* Especially if you take the domains 'hearth and home' and twist them into the single domain "arson."
*Sun wukong may be part of A pantheon, but you still can't worship him.
*Optimus Prime is not the deity of warforged paladins.
*Nor is Megatron the deity of warforged blackguards.
*My warforged is not Optimus Prime.
*Nor is he Megatron.
*No, the secret of making warforged is not the AllSpark.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Antonok
*Optimus Prime is not the deity of warforged paladins.
That would be Robo-cop.
Optimus Prime is the deity of warforged Druids.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*No matter how tone-deaf my character is, I will restrain myself from wailing and belting out terrible songs while I am at the table
**And while I'm in the next room
***And, in the summer when the windows are open, while I'm in the neighborhood
****I may no longer have characters who sing
*No matter what my character wields, "STOP! Hammer Time!" is never an appropriate battle cry
*"Now for wrath, now for ruin, and a red dawn" may be a great battle cry, but I may not use it anytime after noon
*I may only say "For Mako" or "For Lu Ten" once per session, and we will immediately adjourn to mourn individually.
*Even if the Packers are playing the next day, my character will not put a large piece of cheese on his head
*The warforged is not a Borg and does not understand me yelling about resistance being futile.
*I may not go around telling elf/human couples to use birth control because half-elves are worthless
**Especially not in front of the half-elf sorcerer in our party
***It doesn't matter whether its true or not
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*The rules concerning improvised tools are so you can use a hair clip to pick a lock, not so you can use a spoon as a blacksmith's hammer.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Elemental
*The rules concerning improvised tools are so you can use a hair clip to pick a lock, not so you can use a spoon as a blacksmith's hammer.
* Using a spoon as a pipe organ is right out.
** Using a masterwork spoon to negate the penalty will get the DMG thrown at me.
*** I may not use the DMG as a pipe organ either.
*** Using it as a blacksmith's hammer is okay though, and in fact it counts as masterwork for that purpose.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Firing the tank at the dinosaur is a great idea!
**...Where's that -6 to attack coming from?
***Ooooh....You're firing the tank at the dinosaur...
*I am not allowed to play any character whose strength score would imply having biceps bigger than a human head.
**Especially if that character is himself human.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Beowulf DW
*I am not allowed to play any character whose strength score would imply having biceps bigger than a human head.
**Especially if that character is himself human.
* My character my not have a giant bicep for a head.
** Or a pair of heads for biceps.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
"Railgun" is not an available Exotic Weapon Proficiency
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Diamondeye
"Railgun" is not an available Exotic Weapon Proficiency
**Neither is hydrogen bomb
**Or particle accelerator
***Spork never counts as an exotic weapon!
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Necroticplague
Oddly enough, their isn't a "pants" magic item slot, so actually you have to stat up pants as custom slotless magic items.
I'd houserule them into the belt slot.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Strongarm Bracers and a refluffed Large Alchemical Gold Fullblade do not make a Buster Sword.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
-I cannot mix alchemical fire and holy water to a signle double-sized flask and call it "divine wrath"
-nor will it have the effect of both.
-same is true for acid and unholy water.
-alchemical silver cannot be used as a grenade-like-weapon against lycanthropes.
-STOP MESSING ALCHEMICAL ITEMS!
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* I may no longer bluff my way into having the cleric believe I'm not a rogue just for free heals and the like
** I may no longer steal the cleric's arrows until they have nothing to do all combat
*** (On that note,) I may no longer harass the cleric no matter how nice they really are :smallredface:
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
* I may no longer bluff my way into having the cleric believe I'm not a rogue just for free heals and the like
why would the cleric not heal you if you're a rogue? seems rather an odd sentiment, and counter productive too :smallconfused:
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BlackestOfMages
why would the cleric not heal you if you're a rogue? seems rather an odd sentiment, and counter productive too :smallconfused:
He likes casting lots of different spells which is odd and we have a couple of other people who can and will heal so it doesn't matter all that much. My rogue just doesn't trust the other party members as much.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
In Exalted
* The Mask of Winters does not call renegade abyssals "rebel scum" and/or "traitors to the Empire"
* The First and Forsaken Lion does not call renegade abyssals "rebel scum" and/or "traitors to the Empire"
* The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears seduces the heroes, not the other way around
** Even if she is unbelievably sexy
* Just because I (the hero) rescued the Scarlet Empress (the girl) from the Ebon Dragon (the dragon, duh) doesn't mean I get to lay her
** Even if her beauty is outmatched only by The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears and a couple others in the entirety of existence
*** ESPECIALLY if her beauty is outmatched only by The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears and a couple others in the entirety of existence
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
-I may not say "Pazuzu Pazuzu Pazuzu" to kill off myself or the party.
--I may not counter the aforementioned Pazuzu summoning with "Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice".
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Jade Dragon
In Exalted
* The Mask of Winters does not call renegade abyssals "rebel scum" and/or "traitors to the Empire"
* The First and Forsaken Lion does not call renegade abyssals "rebel scum" and/or "traitors to the Empire"
* The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears seduces the heroes, not the other way around
** Even if she is unbelievably sexy
* Just because I (the hero) rescued the Scarlet Empress (the girl) from the Ebon Dragon (the dragon, duh) doesn't mean I get to lay her
** Even if her beauty is outmatched only by The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears and a couple others in the entirety of existence
*** ESPECIALLY if her beauty is outmatched only by The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears and a couple others in the entirety of existence
On that note, I'm gonna post a few of my own, although they may/may not be you are supposed to do in exalted.
*Cannot perform the Creation-slaying Oblvion kick on the basis of the idea that if I do it, the deathlords can't.
*Cannot cure the great curse with any of the following: sufficiently advanced medical treatment, sufficiently advanced martial arts, or sufficiently advanced lovemaking.
**It goes without saying that this applies to sufficiently advanced basket-weaving, too.
*** Cannot attempt to get around this my making a charm for a bright-slap, allowing the use of both sufficiently advanced medicine and marital arts at the same time.
**** “Tying the offending solar to a wall, while giving them a freezing-cold shower and repeatedly applying a cricket-bat to their gronch” is not sufficiently advanced, or even advanced, medicine.
*Even if a sidereal, cannot literally kick reason to the curb.
*Even if you are a courtier focusing on social charms, exaltations of any kind will not be handed out for sexual acts so perverse that it makes the god’s heads tilt.
*Not to create a perfectly saintly and noble character who made an infernal pact wtih the ebon dragon for the sole purpose of rubbing it in his face.
**Even if it is a REALLY impressive **** move, it will still make me acquire torment.
*Not to bite the hand that exalted me.
*Cannot force the neverborn to reincarnate by nailing them to the wheel of reincarnation.
**Even if I somehow grab ALL of the gods at once and ram them into a wall reputedly, cannot force Yu-Shan to create a mechanic allowing the Neverborn to reincarnate.
*** Repeating the same trick with the Yozis and Malfeas, while cathartic, will not help.
* Cannot hit a corpse so hard that they come back to life.
**This will not work with the Neverborn either.
*There is no Fus-Roh-Dah charm, and the dragonborn aren’t that kind of dragonborn.
* Cannot explain to the dragon-blooded that technically, the Green Sun princes ARE demons possessing a human shape, and that they should kill THEM, and leave solars/lunars well enough alone.
**Cannot do this while carrying an infernal exalted in my left hand and using him as an prop.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
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Originally Posted by
Doorhandle
*Not to bite the hand that exalted me.
You haven't heard of dem renegade Abyssals and Infernals?
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*Cannot force the neverborn to reincarnate by nailing them to the wheel of reincarnation.
Why didn't I think of that!?
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* Cannot explain to the dragon-blooded that technically, the Green Sun princes ARE demons possessing a human shape, and that they should kill THEM, and leave solars/lunars well enough alone.
But Infernals are awesome! They're called the rockstars of Hell! Plus, they're more like the primordials than the demons, since essence 10 Infernals ARE primordials. They can make armies out of nothing and become infinitely big.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
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Originally Posted by
Jade Dragon
* Just because I (the hero) rescued the Scarlet Empress (the girl) from the Ebon Dragon (the dragon, duh) doesn't mean I get to lay her
** Even if her beauty is outmatched only by The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears and a couple others in the entirety of existence
*** ESPECIALLY if her beauty is outmatched only by The Lover Clad in Raiment Tears and a couple others in the entirety of existence
I'm confused. What part of this DOESN'T sound perfectly reasonable in Exalted?
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* I may not buy 2 candles of invocation and gate in asmodeus and a solar then fuse with them via the fusion psionic power.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*under no circumstance will I ever be allowed to turn a dragon into a dragon-slaying spear and then use it to kill it's children. It's just plain mean.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*When rescuing farmers from a magical drought, I may not buy their land beforehand at ridiculously low prices and then sell it back to them after we save them for the normal value.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Arbane
I'm confused. What part of this DOESN'T sound perfectly reasonable in Exalted?
Well, this is assuming I'm playing an Anathema and that it's before we start restoring the government and getting everything cleared about the Anathema. Including the facts that we're supposed to lord over the dragon-blooded and eventually go insane (which is why my characters want to restore the government as a republic, and then leave to wander so they can't become blinded to the mortal's lives).
Maybe I should've said "I may not rescue the Scarlet Empress solely so I can lay her".
* The FaFL is not my father
** The Mask of Winters is not my father
*** I may not name my character Skywalker
* No keychains
** Or keyblades
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I may not convince party member to play a human Bardblade if I'm playing a warforged rogue focused on sniping.
**Convincing someone else to play a Crucian Psychic Warrior ubercharger is right out.
*** As is the Katori artificer.
****And the Elf Psion.
*I may not play a warforged rogue focused on sniping.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* In Exalted, when in a First Age flying vehicle and knocked off course so we start heading towards the sun, I may not peer at it and say "that's no sun, that's a space station"
** Or a battle station
*** Even though it is