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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dire Moose
I think I'll wait on telling my friend until I'm more certain, to be honest. There's still one major reason why I'm holding back, and that's because I still identify more with male characters in movies, videogames, etc. than female ones. despite everything else I mentioned before. I still think this is something that needs to be settled, and I still need to wait on telling my friend until I can be sure.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
JusticeZero
It could also be that most female characters, frankly, are pretty awful and uninspiring. It has been an issue for quite awhile..
Yeah, it's sad but true... :smallfrown:
I'm having a mind blank when it comes to great female characters, alas. There are some in obscure SciFi books I'm reading at the moment. An author I remember when I was younger is Tamora Pierce, though I didn't read many of her books beyond the first set of the Circle of Magic ones. I've heard a lot about her strong female characters from a friend so have been meaning to quickly reread those (if I can find them).
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ravens_cry
Well, I went to a local thrift store today and looked around at shoes. I found some that are rather worn, but that also means they're pretty much broken in, and they're 10W woman's, which means I can fit into them comfortably, for lady shoes, that is. And they're super cute, with 1 1/2 inch heels with a little buckle. They give me unwanted height, but no getting around that. I also found this simple, but nice, purple scarf that I could also wear as a sash. It's really helping my confidence just to go in and buy things. While I have had people judge me when I buy this stuff, generally people are OK when money is involved. That is, if they're the ones getting it.
That's pretty awesome. Yay purple!
Ouch. Yay confidence, but people shouldn't be so rude in the first place. :/
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
On the note of good female characters, Nintendo announced today that the 3DS Hyrule Warriors will include a female Link!
My girlfriend's response on hearing the news: 'Congrats to Link on completing her transition!'
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Spoiler
Show
Just interested if people in here are in Arizona/Mesa/Phoenix area. . . I have a date, but back up is always good if my crush doesn't crush me back. ;)
hey folks. What advice do you have for dating? I am about to date a crush.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Rain Dragon
I'm having a mind blank when it comes to great female characters, alas. There are some in obscure SciFi books I'm reading at the moment. An author I remember when I was younger is Tamora Pierce, though I didn't read many of her books beyond the first set of the Circle of Magic ones. I've heard a lot about her strong female characters from a friend so have been meaning to quickly reread those (if I can find them).
A lot of the sci-fi/fantasy books I've been reading recently tend to have an emphasis on the ill-defined 'strong female character' (which usually just means a book with a diverse, fleshed out female cast... sad that that's so rare). Dreamships (and its sequel , Dreaming Metal), Trouble And Her Friends, Woman on the Edge of Time, Embassytown, the Elemental Logic series, all had great female casts (and a lot of them feature LGBT characters/couples too).
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
I think I might have broken my fiance. :smalleek: (in a good way, I think?)
Quote:
Originally Posted by
DarthArminius
Spoiler
Show
Just interested if people in here are in Arizona/Mesa/Phoenix area. . . I have a date, but back up is always good if my crush doesn't crush me back. ;)
hey folks. What advice do you have for dating? I am about to date a crush.
Don't plan for failure. Don't try to "win" them by being someone you're not. Just go in thinking "Might work, might not, and we both have to agree for it to work," have fun, talk, maybe touch each other if the moment is right and you're both into it, get to know them better...
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Syless
On the note of good female characters, Nintendo announced today that the 3DS Hyrule Warriors will include a
female Link!
My girlfriend's response on hearing the news: 'Congrats to Link on completing her transition!'
WHAT?
OK, ok, ok, whatever it takes I have to play this now.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Rain Dragon
That's pretty awesome. Yay purple!
Ouch. Yay confidence, but people shouldn't be so rude in the first place. :/
The last person who was is dead now.
Heh, that sounds terrible doesn't it?
Anyway, here's the latest picture of me. I got some nice compliments of how this outfit turned out. You can't see it, but I am wearing an embroidered jean skirt on my bottom.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Awww, you really are a cute one, raven.
...I have got to get some more girl clothes and put one of me up here.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ravens_cry
The last person who was is dead now.
Heh, that sounds terrible doesn't it?
Anyway, here's the latest picture of me. I got some nice compliments of how this outfit turned out. You can't see it, but I am wearing an embroidered jean skirt on my bottom.
You look derpy-cute. I like it. :)
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Spoiler: Re: Strong And Inspiring Female Characters
Show
Olivia Dunham from Fringe is a great one, as are all of her alternative forms (both one-off joke episode Noir Dunham and the alternate universe (and alternate timeline, which is different) Olivia. I always default to her when this subject comes up for a few good reasons. The first is that she's not a Vasquez knock-off like nine out of ten Strong Female Characters. The second is that while she's a law enforcement official, she has lots of quirks that point to a somewhat lax following of the actual rules when they would interfere with finding justice for the victims of crimes. The third is that she's still got lots of faults and bad points, beyond the standard-issue stubbornness of most SFCs, and she's also got vulnerabilities and things that scare her, but they don't ever actually affect her core character (meaning her story arc doesn't center on them) until one specific incident about two thirds of the way through the show, and that one is handled very discretely and tastefully. Fourth, it's heavily implied that Prime Universe (aka Main Character) Dunham is somewhere on the autism spectrum, because of her combination of insanely good mathematical skills (and photographic memory) and her skewed sense of emotional displays, and she actually does bring it up and discuss it with other characters, wondering if it's bad that she isn't "normal" in the regard of being disgusted by horrific crime scenes or not seeing any issues with drinking puréed tapeworms to jog her memory (that last bit is kind of an extremely specific example, but it makes sense in context). Coming from a family with an autistic brother and mother, and probably being autistic myself (I have a lot of the traits, like stimming, but I've never been tested for it), I found it really nice that a sci-fi show had such a nice portrayal of neurodivergency, to say nothing of lots of mental disorders like psychosis--trust me, it's not cringe-inducing).
(There's also another well-written autism spectrum character who's a bit more obvious, but that's a super good heartwarming episode and I don't want to spoil anything.)
I don't mean to gush so much about the show, but GHHHHHH. Olivia Dunham was one of the first characters on TV I ever actually identified with to a major extent. And she has good trigger discipline, too, which is a huge turn-on for my inner Operator.
Also, there's always Scully.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
OK, new gender icon is up!
Still confused, still unsure, but if I don't at least try this now I'll never know, so I'm going for it.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Yay! Miss Moose is back! :P
I support you 100% as a person, Moose, regardless of where your gender ends up. You're still people, and people are worth supporting.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ravens_cry
The last person who was is dead now.
Heh, that sounds terrible doesn't it?
Anyway, here's the latest picture of me. I got some nice compliments of how this outfit turned out. You can't see it, but I am wearing an embroidered jean skirt on my bottom.
I like your hair, it is very stylish and quite sensible looking.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
JNAProductions
Yay! Miss Moose is back! :P
I support you 100% as a person, Moose, regardless of where your gender ends up. You're still people, and people are worth supporting.
Aww, thank you.
And I apologize for going back and forth all the time in the last month. It's all very confusing to have one's identity challenged and I appreciate you all standing by me all this time.
Also, I'm not sure how comfortable I am with being called "miss." I suppose my mental image of myself is still male at this point. Kind of like how Roy's appearance in the afterlife was still like he'd been in life since he'd only just died, I guess? Anyway, this will still take a lot of getting used to. Especially considering I have no idea how to do anything feminine.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Then plain ol' Moose it is. *Glomps Moose* (Iffin that's okay, of course.)
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dire Moose
Aww, thank you.
And I apologize for going back and forth all the time in the last month. It's all very confusing to have one's identity challenged and I appreciate you all standing by me all this time.
Also, I'm not sure how comfortable I am with being called "miss." I suppose my mental image of myself is still male at this point. Kind of like how Roy's appearance in the afterlife was still like he'd been in life since he'd only just died, I guess? Anyway, this will still take a lot of getting used to. Especially considering I have no idea how to do anything feminine.
*Gives the Moose a resounding high five*
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Not sure how easy it is to glomp a moose, but sure!
*high, um, hooves? Svata back*
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Tamora Pierce, a lot of Anne McCaffery's work, Terry Pratchett's Witches novels (and some others), The Hunger Games, Jasper Fford's Thursday Next books are good places to start for books, and I also did up a really big list of kids' books with good female protaganists if that's worth digging up.
For shows, there's quite a lot lately (especially (fantasy-)police procedurals) with good female characters, often with the male co-star being the civilian - e.g. Forever, Castle, Elementary, Sleepy Hollow, Grimm (a bit of a mixed bag there, though). Bones is particularly good, as well, I think. Bones herself is incredibly logical (to a fault, even), is a leader in her scientific field, and is extremely intelligent. She isn't classically beautiful and she's also definitely not particularly thin, especially by TV's standards, but they never portray her as intrinsically undesirable or anything. It's only rarely that her gender comes up at all, but it's also never suggested that she's any less of a woman for having a number of (traditionally/stereotypically) masculine traits. <3 Bones' character.
Games... I dunno. I haven't really been playing much, and the ones I do you can choose your genders usually (At the moment my Avernum game is 100% lady adventurers :3). I find it a bit sad that in all the gaming news I've heard about recently, I've heard about two where you can have a dog, but none where you can play a woman.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
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Originally Posted by
Grytorm
I like your hair, it is very stylish and quite sensible looking.
Thanks. It's a wig, but I like it a lot. It truly is my hair, even if I didn't grow it. The first time I wore it, I felt so wonderfully feminine.:smallsmile: Sadly, testosterone poisoning has killed (literally) any chance of the kind that is on my scalp working alone.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
@Dire Moose
Glad to hear you're getting things figured out Dire Moose. As I myself have discovered, figuring out this gender stuff is very, very confusing.
@Ravens_cry
I love the hair. It really suits you!
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
JNAProductions
You look derpy-cute. I like it. :)
Heh, thanks:smallredface: I was a little tipsy at the time, as it was at the end of a good get together with friends who did not judge and consistently used proper pronouns.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Masterkerfuffle
@Ravens_cry
I love the hair. It really suits you!
Thank you!:smallbiggrin:
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dire Moose
Also, I'm not sure how comfortable I am with being called "miss." I suppose my mental image of myself is still male at this point. Kind of like how Roy's appearance in the afterlife was still like he'd been in life since he'd only just died, I guess? Anyway, this will still take a lot of getting used to. Especially considering I have no idea how to do anything feminine.
Oh thank heavens I'm not the only one having trouble! My family is getting better at using "they" and I have been really nervous that something is wrong with me for not having waves of contentment and normalcy when I hear it.
Still deciding how much I need to say at work. Customers are just a small wince but they can't know better. Coworkers are slightly more frustrating.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dire Moose
Aww, thank you.
And I apologize for going back and forth all the time in the last month. It's all very confusing to have one's identity challenged and I appreciate you all standing by me all this time.
Also, I'm not sure how comfortable I am with being called "miss." I suppose my mental image of myself is still male at this point. Kind of like how Roy's appearance in the afterlife was still like he'd been in life since he'd only just died, I guess? Anyway, this will still take a lot of getting used to. Especially considering I have no idea how to do anything feminine.
It's alright, it takes time to a) figure it out and b) adjust your mental self-image.
Heck, I've been on HRT for almost three years now and I still occasionally dream of myself as a guy or accidently misgender myself. Don't fret about it. :)
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
To be honest, I've always thought that 'strong female characters' meant 'strong characters who happen to have female bits'. Which means 'strong female characters' would be 'just like a male strong character, same script, but with an actor of a different sex and the pronouns swapped around'. Things like that.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
It varies. Sometimes they're good characters that just happen to be women, and if you swapped their genders they'd be pretty much the same. Sometimes the fact they're a woman is a major defining feature of the character, that couldn't be done or that would be very different if it was a man. Compare Ripley from the first Alien movie with Ripley from the last two Alien movies. The main goal is diversity of character types.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ravens_cry
Thanks. It's a wig, but I like it a lot. It truly is my hair, even if I didn't grow it. The first time I wore it, I felt so wonderfully feminine.:smallsmile: Sadly, testosterone poisoning has killed (literally) any chance of the kind that is on my scalp working alone.
I've been trying to grow my hair out myself since September, but it hasn't gotten very far. I had really long hair in high school and figured I could grow it back to that length, but maybe at 28 I can't do it like that anymore.
..also, my Pathfinder group (only 3 people) knows about me now and they're fine with it. I'm still trying to think of a way to let my best friend know without scaring him to the point of alienating him though. I know "if he can't accept you, he was never your friend," but I absolutely cannot bear to have him leave me at this point. At all.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dire Moose
I've been trying to grow my hair out myself since September, but it hasn't gotten very far. I had really long hair in high school and figured I could grow it back to that length, but maybe at 28 I can't do it like that anymore.
Yeah, the effect is more Robert Pickton than Dolly Parton.:smallyuk: So wigs it is!
Quote:
..also, my Pathfinder group (only 3 people) knows about me now and they're fine with it. I'm still trying to think of a way to let my best friend know without scaring him to the point of alienating him though. I know "if he can't accept you, he was never your friend," but I absolutely cannot bear to have him leave me at this point. At all.
I really don't have an answer to that, sorry. Sometimes, you just got to say it and let them come to terms with it themselves. You can say things in all manner of different ways, but, when it comes down to it, the ball is in their court once you say it.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Hormones are really weird. The past couple of weeks, I've been finding tears springing to my eyes really easily - as in, I so much as think about a piece of music I find stirring and my eyes start leaking. So strange, and somewhat annoying.
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Dire Moose
I've been trying to grow my hair out myself since September, but it hasn't gotten very far. I had really long hair in high school and figured I could grow it back to that length, but maybe at 28 I can't do it like that anymore.
How long did it take to grow that long in high school? Two months is not very long, for hair growth. I'm a cis woman, I got my hair cut to ~standard male length last May (i.e. 18 months ago), and it's now a couple of inches past my shoulders - if I tie it up in a ponytail, the tail is maybe 3-4 inches long. I had waist-length hair before I cut it, but that was about five years worth of growth. I mean, it may indeed be a change in your body since high school, but I honestly wouldn't expect to see much change over two months, except that if you have a fringe it might start to get in your eyes.
Good luck with your friend!
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Re: LGBTAI+ #57 Infinity: I Love You, Always Forever
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Heliomance
Hormones are really weird. The past couple of weeks, I've been finding tears springing to my eyes really easily - as in, I so much as think about a piece of music I find stirring and my eyes start leaking. So strange, and somewhat annoying.
I'm on a hair trigger for that as it is lately... probably means I'll be a hopeless mess when I'm where you are.
And I've let my friend know I'll be calling him Monday evening with something really important, which I've already warned him will be difficult to hear. I did ask him that regardless of what I said, he remain friends with me.
I'm still very nervous though. This isn't something people have to hear all that often.