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Hello, and welcome to the eighth Crack Pairings thread. If you haven't read the previous ones yet, you can do so here, here, here, here, here, here and here.
Or, if you don't wish to read through all 350 pages, here's the short version: we have a roller and some tables. You roll a pairing, and maybe a plot device, then you write it, draw it, act it out, interpretive dance it, whatever! Apparently we like this sort of thing.
An Important Note on Rules:
We've received a few warnings from a staff member about content in the threads. Please keep these things in mind:
- Crack pairings must involve fictionl characters only
- They should all be board appropriate
- Try to stay ontopic, there are other threads for random banter
- PMing crack pairings with "mature" content is not allowed
When posting a pairing, please at least try to do something with it. We like it when people try!
Should you wish to roll a pairing, Sgeo coded up a roller for us. If you want that personal touch, go roll on the tables, or make up your own pairing!
Banners!
Spoiler
Image hosting sites only allow pictures to get a small amount of bandwidth. If you could, please upload banners to an account of your own to not use as much bandwidth for our talented artists, 'less all the beautiful banners disappear.
Text:
http://i920.photobucket.com/albums/a...bannermain.png
Zanaril's
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http://i260.photobucket.com/albums/i...pturecrack.png
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Funky Goose's
Spoiler
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Discord's
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Saeyan
rangermania
Trixie
MReav
Spoiler
Kaytara
Spoiler
half-halfling
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licoot
Spoilerhttp://i867.photobucket.com/albums/a...g?t=1265559201
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http://i867.photobucket.com/albums/a...g?t=1270634696
Felyndiira
Tables!
Spoiler
Initial Table
Roll 2d6 (or more!) decide which tables to pick the characters from.
- OotS Table 1
- OotS Table 2
- OotS Table 3
- OotS Table 4
- Minion List
- Dead Guy List
Table 1 - By Minion992929
- Roy
- Durkon
- Celia
- Xykon
- Tsukiko
- Vaarsuvius
- Monster in The Dark
- Miko
- Nale
- Elan
- Haley
- Belkar
- Lord Shojo
- Redcloak
- Hinjo
- Daigo
- Kazumi
- Inkyrius
- Roll again twice
- Roll again and switch gender
Table 2 - By Minion 992929
- The Guy with a halberd
- Sarah Greenhilt
- Haley's dad
- Thanh
- Julio Scoundrél
- Mr. Rodriguez
- Horace Greenhilt
- Therkla
- Zz'Dtri
- YokYok
- Leeky Windstaff
- The Cliffport chief of police
- Windstriker
- Jirix
- Lien
- Argent
- Yor
- Roll again twice
- Roll again on twice on Initial Table
- Roll again and switch gender
Table 3 - By Minion992929
- Soon Kim (incorporeal)
- Shadowdancer
- Hilgya
- Dorukan
- Bozzok
- Crystal
- Bandit King
- Ancient Black Dragon
- O-Chul
- The Snarl
- The Eye of Fear and Flame
- Lord Kubota
- Thog
- Julia Greenhilt
- Belkar
- The oracle
- Jephton/Haerta/Ganneron
- Roll again twice on Initial Table
- Roll again twice
- Roll again and switch gender
Table 4 - By Minion 992929
- The dragon's hoard
- The chimera
- The really dangerous trap
- Roy's Archon
- The Hydra
- Teevo
- Xykon's zombie dragon head
- Roy's sword
- The entire Hobgoblin army
- The orc chieftain
- The IFCC
- Durkon while under the effects of Thor's might
- Mr Scruffy
- Hieronymus Grubwiggler
- All of the Demon Roaches at once
- Bone golem Roy
- Roll again twice
- Roll again on Tables 1, 2, and 3
- Roll again twice on Initial Table
- Roll again and switch gender
Minion List -Made By MReav
- Goblin
- Hobgoblin
- Kobold
- Ogre
- Lizardfolk
- Bug-people
- Azure City Soldier
- Bandit or Thieves Guild Member
- Orc
- Owlbear
- Troll (flip coin to determine land or sea)
- Zombie
- Ghoul
- City Guardsman
- Angel-thing
- Ghost Martyr
- Roll again on another table.
- Roll again twice
- Roll Again and invert alignment
- Roll again for minion army
Dead Guy List -Made By MReav
- Samantha
- Sangwaan
- Hobgoblin General
- Azure City General
- Death Knight
- Huecva
- Trigak
- Earth Dungeon Guardian
- Fire Dungeon Guardian
- Kraagor
- Mijung
- Eugene Greenhilt
- Old Blind Pete
- Giant Devil
- Buggy-Lou
- Isamu.
- Roll Again on a different table
- Roll Again Twice
- Roll Again and Switch Gender
- Roll again. If you roll this option twice in a row: Eastern Pantheon and World 1.0
Supplemental Plot Devices
Roll 1d4 (or more!)
- Table 1
- Table 2
- Table 3
- Table 4
Table 1 - By Nerdanel
- Unrequited love
- Love potion
- Drunkenness
- Snowed in
- Stuck on a desert island
- In the afterlife
- Aliens Made Them Do It (not necessarily literal aliens)
- True love
- Love/hate relationship
- Adultery
- Pregnancy (use male pregnancy if needed)
- Pink frills and white lace
- French maid costume
- Police/military uniform
- High heels and black leather
- American high school setting
- Someone is a vampire
- Everyone is a furry version of themselves
- Kidnapped (By somebody inside or outside of the pairing)
- Roll again twice
Table 2 - by Sereg
- Dream Sequence
- Anonymous Dating Service
- Bodyswapped
- Meta
- Curse
- Spell gone wrong
- Damsel/dude in distress
- Lots and lots of angst (because then it will be true art)
- Amnesia
- Mistaken identity
- Genre shift
- Finding “new uses” for objects
- The real world
- Geas/Quest
- Zone of Truth
- Truth, dare or command
- Voyeurism
- In a playground
- Roll again twice
- Roll again on another table
Table 3 - by Sereg
- Fulfilling an unusual fantasy (as demonstrated in Coffee Included’s V x Haley x Elan with Belkar watching fic)
- Arranged marriage
- Already married
- Prostitution
- Concubines
- Inheritance of wealth and/or title from obscure dead relative
- Class change/multiclassing
- Team Evil is trying to save the world from the Oots’ plan to control/release the snarl
- Past/future life
- In 20 years from current comic
- They discover that they are close relatives at the end
- Disease
- “The whole party is controlled by giant space cats and Xykon is from modern Earth”
- Deus ex machina
- With the author or another crack-pairer (not in the ship itself, though)
- Narrated by somebody
- On the web-site
- Lampshading (roll again)
- Roll again twice
- Roll again on another table
Table 4 - by Sereg
- While arguing with the author
- It’s not them, it’s their players/character sheets/stat blocks/minis/dice (Yes, I know that this isn’t a game, but when have we let canon stand in our way?)
- To make someone else jealous
- To save the world
- Mind-control
- Twins separated at birth
- This is what the snarl actually does
- In a watery environment
- While under attack
- Because of a literal genie
- Because if they don’t they’ll die/get unmade
- On the rebound
- In jail/a dungeon
- While playing strip-(insert game here)
- Wardrobe malfunction
- On meds
- As part of their therapy
- With a giant
- With a subversion/aversion/inversion/double subversion of (roll again)
- Roll again twice
Of course, feel free to make up your own pairings!