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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* Pyrotechnics does not allow me to create a dragon firework that explodes somewhere over Bywater.
** And I'm not allowed to try and play "catch up" on halflings by stealing their stuff while they're watching the show.
* "Smite Good" refers to alignment, not effectiveness.
* Flash photography against the vampire in the party is not on.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Blisstake
When the bard does a very special dance for me, I'm not allowed to say "I have the weirdest bonus right now."
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Lord_Gareth
"Always make three characters, because you'll probably manage to kill all three of them."?
I believe he was talking about the points he was adding. But anyways, in our present situation, our de facto first rule in Shadowrun is :
Plan B : Add 20kg of high explosives.
It as worked spectacularly for the time being.
* In Shadowrun, Plan A must never be use 20kg of high explosives. It derails the plot and any further plans from the DM.
**Faking the explosion is, on the other hand, perfectly fine.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*When making a Character at Level 10 I may not blow 1000 of my leftover 3000 GP on Alchemists Fire, Oil, and Caltrops and the other 2000 on 2 GP Bear Traps.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* I may no longer be more popular and reasonable than the party Paladin while playing a Lawful Evil character.
* Actually, no more Lawful Evil for you.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I am encouraged to role play dialog between myself and any folowers that I controll. However if the dialog sounds like this I am to be hit in the head with a bat, repeatedly.
"Tangos in building ahead!. Ryans, and Macniel lay down covering fire from that defelade, Kowalski, breach the door, Sanovich and Montigleoni with me"
"sir yes sir"
"tangos at three o clock in the alley"
"Kowalski Status report!"
"Wizard three this is charlie six, you are cleared to engage"
*I may not create or utilize a magical equivalent of walkie talkies
**I may not speak in military phonetics on them
***I may not use them to direct artillery fire, call for reinforcements, or call in air strikes
*I may use thrown weapons that explode, I may not use them to clear rooms prior to my entry
** I may not shout "Grenade!" or "Frag Out!" while doing so.
*If I create another spec ops team equiped with automatic crossbows, vials of alchemist fire, magical communications gear, and trained in aquatic insertions I will be beated with a golf club.
**No more D&D seal teams.
*If I convince the other pcs to go along with me and create a party of awakened penguin artificers, I am awesome.
**If their names are Skipper, Kowalski, Ricco, and Private, I will be sued for copyright infringement. and will still be awesome.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
eulmanis12
**No more D&D seal teams..
***Were-seal teams are also out of the question.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Randomguy
***Were-seal teams are also out of the question.
***Awakened seals are also off limits.
****For that matter, so are walruses.
*****Animated blobs of wax are especially out.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
eulmanis12
**No more D&D seal teams.
***Having the team be entirely comprised of rogues with the Sniper Archetype is right out.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*I may not have my dragonsteed put ranks into Stealth to create a "Stealth Dragpn"
**I may not then use said stealth dragon to do covert infiltrations
***I will not name my infiltration team the Dragon Entrance and Liftoff Tactical Assault Force.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* When my character, Ryan contracts on STD from a sketchy brothel, our next quest is not, "Saving Ryan's Privates."
** When Ryan's disease becomes the town gossip our quest does not become, "Saving Ryan's Privacy."
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*The Warforged may not be a cleric/decisive strike monk/Bard.
**If he is, he may not have extend spell.
***If he has extend spell, he may not use it to start a fight with extending a cure or inflict line spell.
****Especially if he's got a way of either empowering or maximizing it, and more so if he's got a way of doing both.
*****Can't also have song of the white raven.
******Under no circumstances if the above rules are broken may he start a fight by hitting an opponent with a decisive unarmed strike channeling an appropriate Cure/Inflict spell while inspiring courage.
*If he does so, he may not declare in or out of character that he's got the touch, or the power.
*Yeah.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Metahuman1
*The Warforged may not be a cleric/decisive strike monk/Bard.
**If he is, he may not have extend spell.
***If he has extend spell, he may not use it to start a fight with extending a cure or inflict line spell.
****Especially if he's got a way of either empowering or maximizing it, and more so if he's got a way of doing both.
*****Can't also have song of the white raven.
******Under no circumstances if the above rules are broken may he start a fight by hitting an opponent with a decisive unarmed strike channeling an appropriate Cure/Inflict spell while inspiring courage.
*If he does so, he may not declare in or out of character that he's got the touch, or the power.
*Yeah.
** Doing so as a warforged bard (and breaking into a rock number) while holding some sort of artifact is expressly forbidden.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*We will not feed people to our ever hungering ghoul PC.
**Unless we don't want said person to come back in which case we will encourage it, even if it is unlikely to insure that they won't return as a robot or something anyway.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Flight is a privilege, not a right.
**Using it to drop bear traps on the fighter's head will get it revoked.
*Not to refer to British Revolutionary War Soldiers as "Red Shirts" instead of "Lobsterbacks" even if they totally are.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*May not ever found a religion.
**Said religion is not to appear in subsequent games and be taken seriously.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Riverdance
*Flight is a privilege, not a right.
**Using it to drop bear traps on the fighter's head will get it revoked.
*** Nor may I drop drop bears on the fighter's head.
**** I may not sell drop bear repellant to the fighter after telling him of vicious drop bear attacks, even though I know there is no such thing as a drop bear.
***** I may not be surprised when the DM drops a drop bear on my head, just to prove that there ARE, in fact, drop bears.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* Not permitted to try and teach the party barbarian the art of trapfinding by having him close his eyes, put his fingers in his ears, and slap his foot randomly around in front of him as he walks.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*A bear trap is not a trap that drops a bear on someone.
**Unless wizards are involved, in which case it drops an Owlbear on someone.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Charm Persons Stomatic Component is not a hand wave.
*Neither is Suggestions.
*Even if I have that skill trick that let's me disguise my casting.
*If I have that skill trick, I may not know Suggestion or Charm person.
*More so if there are Warforged in the party.
*And I am absolutely not permitted to be able to silence either spell.
*Ignoring the rules so that I can wave my hand and cast the spell and then inform the guards that these are not the warforged they are looking for and that I can go about my business will cause the guards to all suddenly have mind blank and the ability to auto detect what I'm doing, then to attack.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Metahuman1
*Charm Persons Stomatic Component is not a hand wave.
**The somatic component to Charm Person most certainly does not involve removal of clothing.
***If I put it down to a Wardrobe Malfunction I will lose my Charm Privileges.
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Metahuman1
*Neither is Suggestions.
**The Somatic component to Suggestion is not Suggestive in any way.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*** Suggestion isn't just me staring straight at the target either.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ksheep
*** Nor may I drop
drop bears on the fighter's head.
**** I may not sell drop bear repellant to the fighter after telling him of vicious drop bear attacks, even though I know there is no such thing as a drop bear.
***** I may not be surprised when the DM drops a drop bear on my head, just to prove that there ARE, in fact, drop bears.
Is it just me or EV Nova?
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
BootStrapTommy
Is it just me or EV Nova?
Originally heard of Drop Bears from EV Nova, and based the above on it, yes. However, I have since then read/seen other occurrences of Drop Bears, namely on the continent of XXXX on Discworld.
Speaking of which:
****** May not use unnaturally pointy hats as a defense against drop bears.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*If my warforged partymate of any class is somehow destroyed, I may not exclaim "[class] is broken!"
**If a partymate loses a leg, I may not call him imbalanced.
***Balance discussion at the table is forbidden.
****Even in character.
*****You may talk about balance in the context of balance checks.
******The above rule refers to physically balancing, not game balance.
*******You now fail all your balance checks.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Ksheep
Originally heard of Drop Bears from EV Nova, and based the above on it, yes. However, I have since then read/seen other occurrences of Drop Bears, namely on the continent of XXXX on Discworld.
Speaking of which:
****** May not use unnaturally pointy hats as a defense against drop bears.
Drop bears are a tall tale made by australians to scare tourists the greatest threat to the australian way of life!
Ward them off by placing vegmite on the back of your neck!
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
* Having a character be a Spoony Bard is okay, having a character be Lord Vyce is not.
* A person who wields a magic gun and is a man is okay, but he is not allowed to be named Linkara
* No more basing characters off internet celebrities.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
Quote:
Originally Posted by
Incom
*If my warforged partymate of any class is somehow destroyed, I may not exclaim "[class] is broken!"
**If a partymate loses a leg, I may not call him imbalanced.
***Balance discussion at the table is forbidden.
****Even in character.
*****You may talk about balance in the context of balance checks.
******The above rule refers to physically balancing, not game balance.
*******You now fail all your balance checks.
* There is no such skill as Perform (metagame puns)
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Under no circumstances may I worship the Second Law of Thermodynamics as a means to bypass the lawful alignment restriction of a monk.
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Re: Things I May No Longer Do While Playing III: I May Not Iron Heart Surge Rule Zero
*Under no circumstances can I build my own plane inside of a true bag of holding.
**In such a plane in such a bag, I cannot establish a kingdom of kobold cohorts using the leadership feat.
*** I may not gift these kobolds with vast numbers of ring gates, nor train them to be sorcerers, assassins, and fighters.
**** I may not line my party member's tower shield with the ring gates' exits and have kobold sorcs fire spells through them on telepathic command.
***** Not allowed to do the above holding the rings instead in the air with telekinesis.
****** I may not sew ring gates to my robes which link to kobold assassins, who can stab things which attempt to sneak up on me through the gates.
******* I will not reach in the bag, pull out a kobold fighter, and toss him at enemies yelling "Fighter-dokun!".
******** "Kolbold-dokun!" is right out.
********* I can never play a Wizard again, nor have bags of holding, ring gates, or even similar things like portable holes.
* I cannot build a mobile sniper mech for myself and the party's deepwood sniper out of a golem, golem armor, a marvelous mansion, and a conveniently placed hole.
** I cannot use Daern's Instant Fortresses in place of bullets in my sling
*** I cannot build an wrist-mounted repeating crossbow to fire Daern's Instant Fortresses, just because I think the sling is too slow.
**** I'm banned from owning alchemists fire, or any other item roughly equivalent to it.
***** I'm banned from playing an artificer, or having an form of the Craft skill.