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Old 05-26-2011, 07:56 PM   Top  -  End  -  #28
KerfuffleMach2
Bugbear in the Playground
 
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
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Default Re: Dragon Age - A Story

Quote:
Originally Posted by Omeganaut View Post
I just read it and I like it, but I want to mention is that it seems a little too perfect. I can't believe all those teenagers spent all that time at camp, and didn't cause any serious problems. Also how long was camp? Time was not referred to much at all, which tends to confuse readers trying to imagine the story. Still, I feel like its a great idea, keep writing!
The main reason I didn't do too much with the camp is because it's just kind of an intro part. Not really important to the main story.

But, yeah, thanks for the info. If I ever go back and rework stuff, I'll take you comments in consideration.
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