Halfling in the Playground
Join Date: Mar 2012
Re: D&D Snippets II: The Snippetting
*reading Dr Bwaa's comment*
"Naw, that can't be right." I say with a confused expression plastered upon my face.
*reads through the comment again*
"Huh?!? He likes it ... and thinks it is very well written." this time exclaimed with just a hint a disbelief, as acceptance sets in; although trying not to let my ego get to bloated from a singular compliment.
*stepping away from comedic writing to an actual response*
To quote Mark Twain, "I have been complimented many times, and it always leaves me embarrassed. I always felt they haven't said quite enough."
(Actually that might have been more of a paraphrasing.)
Thanks for the compliment, and I would like some critique; if you feel the writing could use it. Although, don't "hit" me ... I bruise easily. Especially my ego.
I may try writing in "snippets" later, when I feel more comfortable with my writing. These background/details/history/world-building writings will make good practice for that.
For now, an intermediary piece to hold you over for the next entry "The Island". Since Dr Bwaa asked for it, I shall deliver. A little more depth to one of the characters in the party.
I will be honest ... I tried to write this out in the same fashion as my previous entry. It just doesn't work. You don't get the true context of the character within this style. So, this will just have one thing. History. I will mix in the other details as I go along. So, this might have the style of a snippet.
An attractive girl, with long blonde hair mixed with pure white streaks, large feathered wings, a lithe body, and pale blue eyes. This young girl lived a sheltered life. On a small island surrounded by monks that had long ago taken a vow of silence.
They have but two purposes, two goals in life.
1. To protect the sacred plant, that only grows on this island, from the outside world. For it is the key ingredient for making Panacea.
2. To protect Jessica from the outside world, for reasons never fully explained to her.
She was told, by The Headmaster (one of two monks who decided not to take the vow of silence), that this has to do with her father. She knew her father, very well. In her childhood he never left her side. It took quite a bit of convincing just to let her have any privacy at all.
Her father was a paladin of great status, a true warrior and hero. He fought his way into the Ninth Layer of Hell and slapped (with his long sword) Asmodeus right across the face, and returned to tell the tale. At least that is what she heard, and never bothered to question it. She knew her father was a hero, but it didn't quite explain why this meant she had to be protected.
Upon reaching her teens, she was left to the care of the Monastery. Her father, over time, started to visit less and less, but she feels like he is always watching. Upon these visits, he will occasionally bring an old traveling buddy. An old man with a fondness for tattoos and red robes. A quiet girl with blue skin and hair. Her favorite of them all, however, was the mountain of muscle called Cronc.
Cronc always has a smile on his face. A feature offset by the whole picture. He looms over everyone else around him, even with the fact that he stands hunched over. Tremendous muscles bulge from everywhere but his belly, which is girthed over from too much meat and booze. Scars cover his body.
When he visits it always starts the same way. He slams his axe head first into the ground and shouts, "JESS!" at the top of his lungs. He is loud enough to be heard from anywhere on the island. She would come running and launch herself into his arms, and he would give her a big hug.
After this, Cronc would share stories of recent adventures. As best as he could describe them. His grasp on the common tongue is tenuous at best. They would mostly entail giant monsters coming out to attack Cronc, and then Cronc smashed them.
Sharing stories was not what Cronc liked the most. After sharing tales of adventures and fighting, he would ask, "Wat yu wunt do?" No matter what she answered, he would find some way to make it happen. Regardless of his limited skill set.
You see, Cronc had a very poor childhood. In his youth he had but one friend. A young girl who learned to look past his monstrous appearance to see the kind soul who lives within it. She was tiny compared to the rest of the kids and tended to be pushed around for it. Cronc would regularly step in and fight to defend her.
On one trip out into the woods, she suggested taking a dip in a small pound. However, Cronc never learned how to swim. She insisted she could teach him and dived right in. She hit hard in the shallow water and laid motionless, face-down on the surface. Cronc tried to save her, but it was too late.
He was blamed for the girl's death and chased out of town. This event left two scars on his person. One is the lost of his first friend. The other was a pathological fear of water.
Jessica reminds him a lot of his old friend. She called him, "Uncle Cronc", which, after learning what "Uncle" means, made him felt a level acceptance and, for that matter, family that he hasn't felt in a long time.
The visits from Cronc, and others, aside, there wasn't much to do in the Monastery. She spent most of her time reading. Most of what they have to read is religious text and ancient indecipherable scrolls. The only thing interesting to read was Henry's secret stash of adventure novels.
Henry is the other monk who foregone the vow of silence. A large man with an equally large curiosity about the outside world. He trades in whatever he can to learn more about it. The island, being impossible to self sustain, needs trade with the mainland to the east for resources otherwise inaccessible. Each time they visited Henry would go to trade with whatever he can for information about the outside world. Books, portraits, maps, even just stories if they had any to share.
This attitude is frowned upon by the other monks, which would prefer that he stayed focus on his duties. His "mania" would reach its peak when he somehow managed to obtain and restore a small boat. However, even he admits that he does not have the courage to take it out.
Whenever Jessica would visit, Henry would let her read whichever adventure novel he just recently finished. Rarely having two copies of any novel, he would then wait eagerly to share notes on the story.
Reading these books made Jessica more and more eager to explore the outside world. Just to see what is out there, books were a pale imitation to the real thing. She was sure.
For a time, the tales of Cronc's journeys, especially how it always ended in combat, kept her from even trying to go. She knew well that she could not fight. Not for a lack of capacity, but for a lack of desire. There is not a single violent bone within her body. She was gifted with the talent of healing through the divine. She takes this as a sign that she is meant to help, not to harm.
Even this can only hold her curiosity at bay for so long. On her sixteenth birthday, when her father came to visit, she asked him a simple question. A simple question that lead to lengthy debates, arguments, and even yelling.
"Can I leave the monastery?"
It took quiet a bit of convincing, and several days, but having pointed out that she can never truly grow living on this island, the father let his daughter leave the nest. Telling her that, " ... if you ever need me, for any reason, I will always be there."
Before she left, Henry offered her two things. His restored boat, and his pristine copy of "Around the World in Eighty Days" by Jules Verne. She thanked him, taking the book, but refusing the boat.
"I'm out to see the world ... and to finally stretch out my wings."
Some of Murphy's other laws.
"Professionals are predictable, but the world is full of amateurs."
"No plan survives the first contact intact."
"If it's stupid, but it works, it isn't stupid."
-Capt. Edward A. Murphy-
Newton's Law of the Road
"The object with more mass has the right-of-way."
Last edited by mebecronck : 09-11-2012 at 09:24 AM.
Reason: Correcting grammar/spelling errors.