09-15-2012, 02:58 PM
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#90
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Troll in the Playground
Join Date: Apr 2010
Gender: 
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Re: Hillariously Stupid Non-Monster Things from D&D
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slipperychicken
Sometimes I want talking-limits as a player, so I don't have to spend 10 minutes listening to some loser BBEG whine about on cryptic bulls*** while I'm forced to politely wait my turn to stab him again. Seriously, how do you form coherent sentences (or even thoughts) while three guys are stabbing you? Also, my character is not waiting for this loser to finish his damn sentence, he's in a screaming blood frenzy, and he's spending every moment hacking his target into a bloody pulp.
The next villain that spends 5 minutes with a pointless mid-combat monologue, I am tempted to have my character stop listening and reply with "I wasn't listening, too busy eviscerating you. Can you repeat that? Actually never mind, it probably wasn't important anyway. Have another stab wound, you big loser". If the monologue was especially eloquent, "No U", or "Whine Moar".
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Yes, real BBEGs tie you up and suspend you over a pool of sharks so that you are forced to listen to them. 
__________________
π = 4
Consider a 5' radius blast: this affects 4 squares which have a circumference of 40' — Actually it's worse than that.
Completely Dysfunctional Handbook
Tomb of Battle: Fighter, Monk, Samurai, Blade Dancer, Knight, Swashbuckler and Ninja.
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