Shipping VII: Something Squicky, This Way Comes

[Raistlin1040]

*Adds the brownie points to his collection of assorted stars, awesome points, and internets* Thank you kindly.

[Felixaar]

I'm considering making a t-shirt, something like

Reinholdt is totally a playa
(Not that it did me any good)

[Cristo Meyers]

I'm considering making a t-shirt, something like

Reinholdt is totally a playa
(Not that it did me any good)

...

...

<_<

>_>

...do it...dooooooo iiiiiiittttt...

<_<

>_>

*hides*

[TwoBitWriter]

You better do it.

I haven't seen Cristo this excited since he came back from that special bar JAP (Just a Party...)

[Cristo Meyers]

You better do it.

I haven't seen Cristo this excited since he came back from that special bar JAP (Just a Party...)

Your attempt at innuendo and/or reference is totally lost on me.

[Mordokai]

Funny. Usually, I'm the clueless one.

[Cristo Meyers]

Funny. Usually, I'm the clueless one.

*pats on head*

You still are, hon, you still are.

[TwoBitWriter]

Meh, it was a bad joke to begin with.

*shrugs*

[Mordokai]

*pats on head*

You still are, hon, you still are.

*pouts*
*bites hand*
*walks away*

...

Has anybody told you you taste awful?

[Cristo Meyers]

*pouts*
*bites hand*
*walks away*

...

Has anybody told you you taste awful?

Been told I have bad taste...not that I taste bad, though, as there's a distinct lack of people willing to try and take a bite out of me.

[TwoBitWriter]

hmm... I smell another ship coming based on this banter...

"You taste awful..."
"But I feel so good with you..."



I know I know, it's a tired trope, but can still be revitalized if you only try...

Edit: @^ See how I resisted making an off-color comment regarding your marriage?

[UncleWolf]

hmm... I smell another ship coming based on this banter...

"You taste awful..."
"But I feel so good with you..."



I know I know, it's a tired trope, but can still be revitalized if you only try...

Edit: @^ See how I resisted making an off-color comment regarding your marriage?

Does that mean that you called the rights to write it?

If not...

[TwoBitWriter]

Who says only one person can write it?

I smell Squick on the horizon...

[Dirk Kris]

Been told I have bad taste...not that I taste bad, though, as there's a distinct lack of people willing to try and take a bite out of me.

*raises hand*
*volunteers*

[Cristo Meyers]

I know I know, it's a tired trope, but can still be revitalized if you only try...

We can rebuild it...

better...

...faster...

...err...Ho-Yay-ier...

"Um, sir, is that even a word?"

Shut up Phil...

Edit: @^ See how I resisted making an off-color comment regarding your marriage?

Truly your willpower is second to none.

[Mordokai]

Been told I have bad taste...not that I taste bad, though, as there's a distinct lack of people willing to try and take a bite out of me.

So many options...

No! Must... stay... strong!

[TwoBitWriter]

Truly your willpower is second to none.

You have never met my teenaged self.

[Cristo Meyers]

You have never met my teenaged self.

Verily, and it is from this that I realize that I am truly blessed...

[TwoBitWriter]

Hey, you and I could have had a lot of fun. Hanging out, vandalizing a rich kid's car, playing D&D and Shadowrun, then underage drinking all night.

Those were the days. *sigh*

Okay... admittedly we only vandalized a car once. But that guy had it coming!

[Mordokai]

You know what they said about appologizing for your actions to a forum full of strangers

[mangosta71]

As much fun as it is to watch you guys go back and forth, I'm gonna interrupt it. Because I can.

Beginning - untitled-space-opera-type-thing part 4
Rabbit, Wolfbane, Twobit, and Reinholdt appearing, Draken mentioned

Spoiler

Show

Rabbit marveled at the quickness of her recovery. She had regained consciousness less than two days ago, and now felt herself to be in better physical health than she could ever remember feeling. The door to her room opened and Wolfbane stepped in. “You have been summoned. Come.”

She fell into step at his side. “Who ‘summoned’ me? Where are we going?”

Wolfbane glanced at her out of the corner of his eye. “I find it curious that you would expect me to answer your questions when you so vehemently refuse to answer mine.” He continued in silence. Angry spots of color marred Rabbit’s cheeks. They stepped into an elevator. After a few seconds of imperceptible motion, Wolfbane led her off and down another corridor, eventually knocking on a door marked with a golden eight-pointed star. The bottom point was more than twice as long as the others, though the two adjacent to it also seemed stretched.

“Enter.” Wolfbane touched a panel next to the door and it slid open with a quiet hiss. He stepped through and came to attention. Rabbit followed him through. “Wolfbane, you are dismissed.” He saluted and strode from the room without looking back. The door closed behind him.

The man who had spoken turned from his desk and gave Rabbit an appraising look. He looked to be older than she, perhaps thirty years of age. Neatly trimmed blonde hair and beard framed an angular face. Ice blue eyes met her dark brown ones. A scar under his left eye pulled his lip into a semblance of a smirk. He stood and gestured toward an empty chair opposite the desk. “I am Twobit. Would you care to sit?”

Rabbit’s back stiffened. “Rabbit Hole – ”

“ – Lost, Ensign, 4234177191526986. Yes, I know. Taking it a little far, aren’t we? I wish to show you something.” He opened a folder on his desk, turned it, and pushed it to her. She hesitated. He nodded and sat, leaning back in his chair. She looked down and saw what appeared to be a form letter.

Mr. and Mrs. Lost,
We regret to inform you that your daughter, Ensign Rabbit Hole Lost, has been killed in action. Furthermore, due to the circumstances of the incident, we were unable to recover her body. We are saddened by the loss of such an exceptional and promising young individual. She will be sorely missed. A memorial service for her will be held at the naval base in Norfolk next Saturday.
Sorrowfully yours,
Admiral Destro Yersul

She rocked back on her heels and raised her eyes to stare at the man behind the desk. “Turn the page. There’s more.” She obeyed numbly, and found her personnel file. A complete biographical index, including the marks she had received at the academy, performance in simulations, a list of assignments she had been given, psychiatric evaluation… The color drained from her face.

“Where did you get this?”

“One of our reconnaissance vessels hacked into your military database. You’ve seen that we have your entire file here. We also have information on every other officer in your military, including the current deployment of all of your forces. So really, there’s nothing you can tell us that we don’t already know. You don’t have to take care to avoid betraying any secrets.” An unfriendly smile creased his face. “Now, it’s not generally our policy to take prisoners. In fact, since you’ve been declared dead, I’m under no obligation to treat you according to the Geneva convention rulings for prisoners of war.”

Rabbit swallowed hard. “Then why keep me alive? Why rescue me at all?”

“I had you rescued because I was curious to find that someone Draken had shot down was alive. This was before I discovered that you only survived because he was aiming at someone else. But once we’d gone to the trouble of saving your life, it seemed wasteful to just let you die. Or shove you out an airlock.” He shrugged. “At any rate, everyone on this ship is expected to work if they want to eat. Normally, you would work for Draken, since he’s the one that captured you. But I’m going to pull rank to claim you. For one, I doubt you would find working for him pleasant. I myself find him rather abrasive, but he’s the best we have. At any rate, you’ll be given a tag when you leave here. As long as you wear it, you will be under my protection. Of course, if you do something that requires correction, that will be my responsibility as well. Do you understand?”

Rabbit fixed him with a firm glare. “Why should I agree to that?”

“You can be compelled to obey if you prefer. There are certain chemicals that will make you very agreeable to suggestions. You would retain your memory as punishment for making such measures necessary. I’m giving you a choice. You can work for me of your own free will, or I can break you. If you choose the former, your work will primarily be technical. You will receive any training you may need. You may even fly again some day. If you choose the latter, your assignment will be less palatable. I assure you, you will hate your life. You will weep and beg for the sweet release of oblivion. Which will not be granted.” His tone was conversational, but his eyes were hard. “If you wish, I can give you a taste of that before you make your decision.”

Twobit’s calm, matter-of-fact tone frightened Rabbit more than the shrieked curses of a sergeant ever had. A lump formed in her throat. She tried to swallow it and failed. Her voice croaked as she accepted his terms.

“Excellent.” He pressed a button on his desk and spoke softly for a moment. The door hissed open. A young man with blue hair and eyes wearing a less militaristic jumpsuit strode in. “Reinholdt will get you situated and see to it that you’re given an assignment. Now, go. We both have work to do.” He turned back to the screen on his desk. Reinholdt gave Rabbit a shy, nervous smile and gestured toward the open door.

[Reinholdt]

Yay for great ships!

@ Dirk - Poor Dirk. Rough situation.

@ Dragonrider - That's right Not a playa! That was a sweet one.

@ Mangosta - Eep! TwoBit is mean...
Ok, I wouldn't mind have some of those chemicals he mentioned for, uh, scientific purposes. Yeah. That's it. Science.
>>
<<

I'm considering making a t-shirt, something like

Reinholdt is totally a playa
(Not that it did me any good)

NOT a playa.

[TwoBitWriter]

Mangosta, holy crap I'm evil!

This series is very enjoyable, and not because i'm the bad guy (but I can't help but think I serve a greater evil...)

You have inspired me to finish that latest MAT Squad chapter.

Cristo's death approaches...
Honestly, I'm glad it's taken so long and he and I have gotten to know one another better. It's gonna make killing him so much more enjoyable...

[Cristo Meyers]

Cristo's death approaches...
Honestly, I'm glad it's taken so long and he and I have gotten to know one another better. It's gonna make killing him so much more enjoyable...

Why does everyone keep saying that?

[Fredthefighter]

Why does everyone keep saying that?

Cristo, I don't think I've ever said that. Just letting you know that I have never planned your death.

[Felixaar]

(psst! Fred! opposite day was like, two weeks ago!)

Like it, Mango.

Also, to many hilarious things said in this thread to address them all *giggle*

[mangosta71]

I didn't realize he came across as that evil. Guess it just comes naturally to me.

[Quincunx]

There is an imbalance in the gender ratio. Either that or I haven't got the hang of this 'casting' idea yet.

No Flowers (dallas-dakota, Recaiden, generic female)

Spoiler

Show

He slammed the front door shut against a gust of spring wind, kicked off his shoes, rounded the corner into the kitchen, and stared. Her stomach poked out down the centerline, and her hair was caught on the end of one breast, and the light overhead threw stomach shadows halfway to her knees, and--

"Maura? Who was that?" His friend's voice.

The girl turned away from dallas-dakota, calling, "I think it's the guy that lives here! I didn't let him in," and the hair fell away.

"Crap!"

dallas-dakota was already in motion; he bolted into his room and pushed the door shut, propelling Recaiden the rest of the way out with it. His computer _was_ on, and the screensaver _was_ flashing through pictures of lithe women in intriguing outfits; he swiped at the touchpad until those went away and maybe she hadn't seen them. Maybe he hadn't seen her. Maybe she hadn't seen him seeing her--

*****

She'd dragged the splintered old coffee table out to the yard and now, kneeling beside it, shook a bag of potting soil into rows of tiny white pots. Between the bag and the table, dallas-dakota couldn't see much of her at all, but she was outside, in the windy morning, and didn't seem to have much more on her than the gardening gloves.

Maura spied him anyway. "Come out here and help me! This is going to take two people!"

He slunk outside and barricaded himself behind the bag and table. "Hi, Maura. . .I didn't think you were here. . ."

"Recaiden said it was OK, and your lawn here is dying. At negative HP and bleeding. I'm going to rip it out and plant some veggies instead. This spot is too good to waste with a dead lawn." She swatted at her hair as the wind flipped it into her face; bits of soil fell from the gloves and tumbled down her back. dallas-dakota swallowed, twice, but couldn't get any power to speak with. He nodded.

"Not flowers. I hate flowers," she announced, and plonked the sagging bag onto the ground. "Pick the pots off the table first." He lifted one--it used to be cherry-and-crumble yogurt--and held onto it until she scooped up four and put them on the crinkling grass. It _was_ looking kind of dead. dallas-dakota put down the pot, and another, making a neat line on his side. "Come here and hold the bag open. I'll do the sweeping. You'd get dirty."

dallas-dakota stepped over the line of seedling pots and edged past the barricade.

*****

It'd started with the geeks, but "Lobster Johnson" spread around the school, much as he tried to explain otherwise. Earnestly, repeating every detail three times, he made sure everyone understood why _he_ was coincidentally standing in that hallway despite having no classes there, and how _she_ had startled him. But no matter the approach, someone had to butt in, "So you saw her with her clothes _on_ and turned red as a--"

*****

Today he sprinted into the house two minutes too late to avoid the downpour, and the door swung shut from as much rain as wind. Maura sitting in the kitchen, labeling a set of M:tG blanks and slipping them into plastic card envelopes, was almost to be expected by now. Still. . ."Why _do_ you spend so much time over here?" he ventured, after hanging up his dripping coat and removing his soaked shoes.

"It's nice here. Sort of home-like," Maura replied. For the first time, she stopped and thought before talking, drumming the pencil against the 'Chinese Cabbage' label and smudging the ink. "Recaiden _did_ say it was all right. . ."

dallas-dakota winced then, seeing how her eyes focused on him, clouded with doubt. "It's fine, it's fine, I like having you over here! We don't have to go out!" That hit his ears only after it'd left his lips. "Oh no. That's all right! I mean. . ."

He twisted away and stared at the stove. It was easier than being stared at by her.

She pressed her hands flat against the table, stood, and told him, "I'll talk to you later." Maura left, but her words didn't go with her. They clouded the air where she'd been sitting.

*****

dallas-dakota sat at the kitchen table, shuffling the blank cards, fiddling with the pile of plastic-jacketed seed labels. He should've stopped her from leaving. Too late for that. He should've called her by now. He didn't have her number. What could he say? "Hi Recaiden, could you give me Maura's number, because I need to apologize to her. Because I accidentally asked her out, that's why. At my house. Yes, she comes over when you're not here. I didn't know you were planning to make a move on her. . ."

*****

He unbolted the front door and was shocked twice: she was arriving and she was clothed. Maura stepped inside without waiting for a greeting and he got the door shut just before she loosened the belt of the raincoat. She was still wearing her school clothes.

"I can't stay here long. So. Yes, we can go out, if we're doing something cheap. I spent all my money for the month at the garden center. And no flowers. If you bring flowers, it's off. You shouldn't bring flowers to someone else's girlfriend." The corners of her mouth dimpled, then. dallas-dakota sagged at the knees.

"You two are boyfriend/girlfriend?!?!"

"OK, maybe 'dating' is a better word. Yeah, we're dating, but it's not exclusive. And I wouldn't mind dating you too. But before that. Right now. I want to hear you say 'I'm sorry'--"

Shock after shock after shock. "--What?"

"It's sweet, asking me on a date instead of apologizing, but you still have to say it sometime. I don't want it bubbling out of you in the middle of the date."

dallas-dakota. Lobster Johnson. Can't bear to see Maura clothed _or_ naked. The blush stole all his energy and he couldn't speak, again. After awhile Maura let herself out and shut the door behind her.

*****

dallas-dakota had no idea what was so "guerilla" about it, but just going to a regular garden and looking at it was expensive, and probably boring. At least this promised to be something that they could _do_, not just look at.

The girl stopped fussing with the 'build your own backyard pond' display and grinned up at him, "How can Alphonse's Garden Center help you today?"

"I'm looking for. . .", he checked the strip torn off of the bottom of the flyer, "self-seeding perennial seeds."

"Ah, I see!" She picked the paper from between his fingers, read it, and gave him a conspiratorial look. "I'm not supposed to know anything about this, and I'm certainly not supposed to tell you beforehand, but you'll want something that thrives in full sun and wet soil. Flower, herb, or vegetable?"

[Felixaar]

Aww, Quin, that was cute

[Destro_Yersul]

Blar. Forums were out, had ship ideas, ideas tried to escape, didn't let them. Therefore, behold the ShipStorm.

Meet the Parent
Reinholdt/DeeRee/Twobit

Spoiler

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What are you so worried about? He'll love you.

Reinholdt was fiddling with his hat for the umpteenth time in as many minutes. Can't really explain it, DeeRee. Meeting your dad just makes me nervous.

Well don't be. Come on. She grinned and pulled him out of the car. He can't complain, can he? We won't be out very late.

I suppose not... Reinholdt set the hat back on his head and did his best to smile without looking nervous.

DeeRee pulled the front door open. I'm home! And I brought a friend!

Twobit glanced out from the kitchen. Oh? Anyone I've met?

No.

Good. Everyone I know is entirely too disreputable to be friends with you. Twobit laughed and came out into the entrance hall.

Dad, this is Reinholdt.

Twobit shook Reinholdt's hand. Good to meet you. Come in, sit down. I'll go fetch my shotgun, just in case.

Reinholdt made a small noise roughly akin to that a cornered mouse might make, and Twobit laughed again. DeeRee just shook her head. He's kidding you, Rein.

They all went into the living room, Twobit leading the way. He doesn't sound like he's kidding...

I was. I don't shoot people inside. Way too much cleanup. Now then, what brings you by?

Well, I wanted to... Reinholdt trailed off and DeeRee stepped in.

Reinholdt asked me out, dad.

That warranted a raised eyebrow. Did he now? Well then, I'm obliged to be immediately suspicious of your intentions, Rein.

Reinholdt started to protest, Twobit grinning widely. He stopped and blushed. You're kidding again, aren't you?

Not really, but go on.

Well, it's just that... I really like DeeRee. A lot. And I wanted to do this properly and meet you before we went anywhere... I don't really have any intentions yet. We're just going to dinner.

Oh? Where to?

This great little Italian place I know. Hole in the wall, but the food is good.

Weeeell... Twobit leaned back in his chair, looking thoughtful.

Dad! DeeRee punched him lightly on the arm, and he laughed again.

Alright. But be back by 9, or I'm coming to look for you.

All the way back out to the car Reinholdt was letting out the breath he had been holding. I really hope I didn't screw that up.

DeeRee smiled and took his hand. You did fine, Reiny.

Forgetting.
Raistlin/Brandi

Spoiler

Show

Raistlin stepped into the bar, wondering again why he came here. The band was horrible and the atmosphere left something to be desired. At least the drinks were cheap. He walked over to the bar and dropped into a seat. Tequila.

You here to forget something? Most people go for a beer to start with.

Got some memories that need drowning. Just gimme the tequila. The bartender slid a shot glass over and Raistlin downed it. Thanks.

Two shots later a woman came up to him. Raistlin was tapping his foot to the music. Want to dance?

Huh? Oh, sorry. No. Can't dance. He grinned up at her. Thanks for asking, but I think I'll stay here and drown my sorrows.

Come on, it'll be fun. She grabbed his arm and pulled him off the stool. The fourth empty shot glass got put down beside the first three, and then they were out on the floor.

The first two dances were great. I love this band. Raistlin laughed and led her off the floor to take a break. Another pair of glasses joined the first four.

So what are you here to drown, anyways?

Hmm? I.. Raistlin laughed. I can't remember.

Guess you succeeded, then.

Guess I did. Raistlin leaned over the bar. Hey, barkeep. Give everyone a round on me. Then he pulled his new friend back onto the dance floor.

The night went on for another couple hours. Ten little shot glasses lined the bar, and Raistlin was, by this time, leaning on the girl for support. How many drinks have you had?

Dunno. Have to start over at one. He grinned at her, and she laughed.

I think you're done for the night. Pay off your tab and we'll get you into a cab home.

You.. better come with me. Raistlin continued grinning. Need to make sure I get home alright.

Well, if that's the case, maybe you should stay at my place instead. The tab got payed off and she half walked, half carried him out the door.

You know, I had a lot of fun tonight, but I don't even know your name yet.

It's Brandi.

Brandi.. Raistlin rolled the name around in his head. Pretty name. I'm Raistlin.

Brandi giggled. It's nice to meet you, Raistlin.

Stolen Moment
Destro/Rabbit

Spoiler

Show

Destro sat on the couch, not really watching the movie. He was too busy thinking, though not about anything in particular.

He heard footsteps, and looked up. Rabbit sat down beside him. Destro put an arm around her and smiled. Hello, love. How was your day?

Better now. She replied, and snuggled up against him.

I'm glad to hear that. They leaned back on the couch, still not really watching the movie, and cuddled up closer to each other.

I love you, Des.

Destro leaned in and kissed her. I love you too.