I actually laughed out loud when reading this, its so awesome.

Good spells would be:

Magic stone: Picks up stones from the ground.

Launch Bolt: throws Bolt.

Read Magic: Sits and looks at things believing to understand it. (This one could be extra hilarious)

Disrupt undead: He is embarassed that he has not learnt to do it at range and needs melee touch but basks in the fact that his spell is better. (He punches the undead)

Also, obvious use of stinking cloud spell, centered and permanencied on himself, or non permanent use of a swift action...