*May not create an Unarmed Swordsage specializing in Desert Wind in 3.5
*May not make a Monk of the Four Winds in Pathfinder
*On the off chance that I'm able to create anything with similar abilities, under no circumstances may I yell "Falcon Punch!"
*You know what? You say Falcon Anything, you're getting polymorphed into a newt, and you will not get better!