-The Earth of the Homeland weakness says "If reduced to level 1 in this way, a No-Life King falls into a torpor from which they can only be roused by the taste and subsequent consumption of virgin blood." Shouldn't that be "if reduced below level 1"?
-If total HD cannot exceed character level, and character level is equal to levels in all classes (and therefore HD), what good is the extra hit die? Unless you meant HD from that ability, in which case you should probably say so.
-The whole "drained becomes a zombie" thing is not at all like normal zombies: Normal zombies are mindless (no INT score) and can never take class levels. You should pick a different type, or make your own.
-The Alternate Form ability presumably works like the usual Alternate Form ability, so you only have to specify any differences (such as the eligible types of forms and the loss of other class features.)