King of Wherever-we-aren't-outlaws: Thank you for coming on such short notice! We had heard of your deeds...
Me: Whatever, where are we going?
King: You will be going ...
*dramatic pause* ... into the depths of Hell itself!
Me: Uh-huh... and our reward for this would be...?
King: You will have the eternal gratitude of this-tiny-little-kingdom-worth-2gp.
Me:
Group huddle.
Paladin: Surely we must undertake this most noble...
Sorcerer: We need the XP...
Cleric: The gratitude might be good for us...
Me: I have a much better idea. Watch.
Me: <rolls Bluff> Oh Great and Honorable King of this-place-with-relaxed-laws-on-murder-and-stealing-and-stuff, we accept your quest!
Outside the palace
Sorcerer: How is this any different from what we were going to do? And why were you rolling Bluff back there?
Me: I head to the tavern and look for an inexperienced group of adventurers.
GM:
Okay, I guess...
Inexperienced Wizard: *casts Mage Hand* *spills ale on self*
Inexperienced Rogue: *tries to pickpocket someone* *gets hand chopped off*
Inexperienced Cleric: *tries to heal hand* *inflicts wounds*
Me (on table): Are there any brave and worthy adventurer's here, who might aid us in our time of need?
Inexperienced Adventurers: Us! Us!
Me: Then, please, accept our quest to journey into the pits of hell and ...
Inexperienced Adventurers: Okay! *rushes out door*
Paladin: What. Did. You. Just. Do.
Me: Well, you know how all those quest givers are always higher-level than us?
Paladin: ....
Me: Aaaand, you know how we don't really want to get ourselves mixed up in that sort of thing?
Paladin:
....
Me: So, I, you know, gave them a quest. Because I'm a quest giver now. And stuff.
Paladin:
....
Me: So..... Do we receive XP for delegating the quest, if they succeed?
GM: Yes, you would.
Me: "Would"?
GM: Well, they still have to succeed. And it's hard to succeed when you're dead.
Me: Ah.
Paladin:
....
Me: Well... Let's get going on that quest then, shall we?
Paladin: Smite. Evil.