The poor stallion buried himself beneath rose petals, covering himself completely with his wings, even humming a little ditty to himself as he rubbed his ears. Nothing helped. The irony of it all; he managed to get away from the horror of dating, just to get trapped beneath a pair of ponies smooching it up like there was no tomorrow. But he could take it. He'd hid out in rough spots before. Hay, that one time, he hid in some damp brushes for hours on assignment. He'd had training, both physical and mental, raising his fortitude to levels worthy of one working for the princesses. This was nothing. He could take this. He would outlast the Hot Pony Kisses. They would not break him. He would remain single yet another-
*one minute, twenty-two seconds later*
Sandy burst out of the dumpster, his short-cut mane flowing in a dramatic swirl of rose petals. The two hovering, smooching ponies would get bumped aside by the lid, but not enough to throw them any great distance. The poor stallion flopped over the side of the dumpster, gasping for breath and holding his hooves over his assaulted ears. "Mercy! Uncle! I give! I surrender! No more! You win! Just...just stop th' smooches, for th' love of th' sun an' moon, make it stop!" Steam poured out of his ears, and his cheeks were flushed so red they might've been glowing.
(I'll be waiting for Night Jewel before continuing with Sandy, but you're free to react)