Fake Seclusion

Title: Fake Seclusion
It's quiet here. The words of silence
are contained by the abbey walls.

I sit here often on this bench.
Alone, here in the flower garden.

The sun gives warmth but as she sets
it's time to go and join the meal.

I obey the gesture and go to bed,
and then the numbness starts to squeal.

Shame and blame are nested deep.
Untold horrors and regrets,
are fighting me in my sleep.

To protect me against it all,
the leather bonds are tightly bound.
My screaming echoes through the hall.

After pills and morning pray,
I'm released to get dressed.

I'll take a walk and on the way
trying to find my inner rest.