Assault rifles with virtually no recoil and high accuracy, noob tubes, and some variation of the knife-pistol combo is the kit Clarissa rolls with. That's 'cause she's cheap. Not cheap enough to quickscope, but cheap and tactical enough to beat a quickscoper and off a C4 grenadier on an open map.
Online matchmaking time, methinks. Time to teach Day the ropes of the art of smack talk.
An annoying, nasally voice pours out of television's speakers! Yech! It's a ten year old bragging about his last match!
"Lol! I got a ten killstreak and called in the chopper and everyone else was all like 'You're a beast at this game.' You all just suck and need hax to do anything right."
"Listen to that kid! Bet he can't play well under stress. We can trap him in a corner and laugh at him, if you'd like. Or kill him until he ragequits."