2012-09-19, 10:20 PM (ISO 8601)
Re: Of Books and Barbarians
I am having extreme trouble staying interested in this comic. This is something that has probably been incredibly easy to determine for the last 6 updates or so. I have been trying to continue updating regardless, because people do read this comic and are interested in where it is going. The difficulty comes from two directions.
Firstly that I chose a standard fantasy universe to frame this story in, which makes it difficult to enjoy any sense of discovery on my part. Secondly that I have already started and abandoned two comics on these forums (One due to being an irritable teenager hounded with constant criticism, not a good combination when hormones are raging and pride rules as king.) and the other was based off the first. The second felt much too reliant on the rules established by the first (which I was trying to distance myself from at the time) while also being unable to really answer all of the questions left behind by the premature ending of the first. This made it too attached to something that I already had a lot of bitter emotions about at the time.
I made Of Books and Barbarians once my head had cleared some and I had gained some wisdom. Three years doesn't seem like a long time, but between the ages of 16 and 19, a lot of a guy's brain chemistry changes. I figured I had matured enough to be able to try my hand at comic making again.
If I myself am not able to stay invested in this comic, how can I justify continuing to make it? Don't get me wrong, I love making comics. I still want to make comics - but not this one. And it makes me feel terrible, because I already feel like I've abandoned too many projects to justify dropping another. I feel terrible because I have fans who like this comic and want to see where it goes, and they may never do so. Even if I continued to make the comic, there wouldn't be that energy and discovery in it that fans deserve.
So I've hit a wall. Where do I go from here? I've tried to make myself enjoy this comic, but as much as I try I just can't seem to sum up the enthusiasm. Even an art change wasn't enough to do it (Though that was fun on its own!). I don't want to force myself to do something like that, but on some level I feel bad for you lot. I know more people read this than comment, so I know I'm not talking to only three to six people.
I've learned a lot from this comic in the last 33 pages, surprisingly. Getting back into the game taught me a lot of things in a short amount of time. Would you, as fans, be able to forgive the loss of this comic if I applied that knowledge to a totally new one? Even if it were a new genre to explore entirely?
So that's my conundrum.