Frozen Webs and Dragon’s Breath:

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For a handful of rounds there is some scrambling and profanity as diminutive dragon-spiders hit and run against the PC’s and try to attrition enough stat damage to create easies meals for mom. There is something immensely satisfying when it comes to the visual of a 7 foot tall half orc with muscles enough for three men swinging a greataxe at a target the size of a quarter. They are reduced to having the witches cackle and try to suppress saving throws while the twins channel negative energy as a form of bug zapping. The hatchling are robust for their size and while some hit the ground all eight legs and two wings up…most simply run away and are cycled in for fresh ones.

While the skirmishes rage on…they form up the framework of a plan. Seraphim will use flaming sphere to create a tunnel out of the alcove and they are going to follow the tunnel towards the corridors leading away from the white’s domain. Their intent is to get the hell out of Dodge.

Seraphim sends the orb ahead of the group with Doc and his flaming greataxe in the lead. Dis Pater takes rearguard and they begin a hussled exit from their temporary refuge. No sooner do they attempt to exit than Icy Eight (their nickname for the dragon) lands at the end of her iced web and sends her breath weapon straight down the barrel of their exit path…the whole group is sent reeling and all except Seraphim end up entangled in the various frost webs. The hatchlings begin to swarm them and send icy needles en masse at the group.

Seraphim: I think it is safe to say that you in essence have us at your mercy. Such a position of strength opens the door for you to create an even better outcome than our deaths. We are worth more alive than dead.

The dragon reveals a wide and completely mocking grin…

Icy: Food sometimes is more satisfying when it wriggles mid chew…but dead is how I prefer my meals.

Seraphim: Yes…but if you eat us you will be full for a day…let us bring you food and you will be sated for a lifetime. All we require is the bones afterwards.

Icy: I am doing just fine for myself. Nothing has exceeded my grasp yet.

Azzie: Cept fer the dragons that already sodded off and are divvying up your treasures as we speak.

That gets her attention…

Icy: You propose to kill the wyrms that I myself could not, when I myself have already claimed you as a prize…twice now for the first to die.

Azzie: Damn right twice you manky git. And together we can do for them that you couldn’t do for yourself.

Icy: What gurantee do I have that you won’t cross me the second you have an advantage, or that you will not simply scamper off in cowardice depriving me of a fresh meal?

Seraphim: I would put this delicately but we don’t excel at delicate. You caught us in a bad spot. If we had all of our resources lined up and ready this would have gone far differently. We recently got betrayed ourselves and to be blunt we need you alive more than we could benefit from you being dead.
We are manipulative and deceitful but up front about it. We will eventually end this relationship, but we have a mutual interest and if there comes a time where that is no longer the case we will tell you in no uncertain terms and part ways…or kill each other in the process.

I propose the following. We will furnish meat both alive and dead….your preference. All non wearable valuables we will donate to you directly. Wearable items of value we will make use of on a loaned basis. We will formulate and execute a plan to retrieve the full value of the hoard beyond. All contents of the hoard will go into your possession.

In return we get use of the corpses in a manner we see fit. We are provided use of an alcove as a base and secured place of safety. We expect you to protect this area and us while we are in it and we will do the same for you. If at anytime you seek the dissolution of this agreement we request one hour’s notice and we will vacate the premises and part ways.

Icy: I want insurance. One of your party must remain as my hostage, meanwhile I expect the remaining group to bring back to me a good intentions tithe of food and treasure.

The put their heads together and decide that Azzie should stay with the dragon while they delve for some sacrifices to bring back. The group nearly votes unanimously on this…Azzie disagrees.

Azzie: No no no…Ive had my fill of this beastie. No bloody way Im staying. One of you can swap stories with the murdering beast.

There is a long ranging back and forth that culminates in Hades staying behind with the dragon.

From my end I am very curious to see what direction they take from here. And they do not disappoint me with their next step.

They in essence convince the dragon to lay in wait at the entrance of the dragon corridor…they are bringing back some meals and those meals might still be mobile. They also ask for him to lace the passage leading to the dragon corridor with frost webs…but leave a tunnel in the center. They also ask for the hatchlings to hide in the tunnel.

Which leads to the following priceless swerve.

Seraphim: We are heading back up to Moo-Dor

An overnight strategy session and reconfigure of their spell slots precedes the group’s swagger back to the gate leading to Moo-Dor. They operate under the idea that their previous stronghold is currently occupied with the were-dwarves who will now eagerly reengage the Undead Cowboys.

Doc and Dis Pater are buffed to the gills, and as they will the doors to open they are not disappointed to find the platoon of dwarves milling about the Moo-Dor complex. A series of flaming sphere, and negative energy spill from the lower level…Doc immediately triggers a psychic lion’s charge to full attack the closest dwarf at a run, Dis Pater does a similar charge to a nearby target and within one round all hell breaks loose. The Cowboys throw their best combination of spells and attacks into the surprise round and then turn tail and run.

As expected the dwarves form up and follow en masse. Seraphim and Pluto throw out delaying spells and they play leap frog with the fighters in a measured retreat. Azzie lays down bowfire while taunting from the distance.

Azzie: I ain’t seen a clustf**k like this lot since my days in Lilliput. These lads are short enuff and airy enuff to make me fink I accidentally shagged a mutt and now they is after child support. *

They lead the dwarves on a merry chase and Pied Piper them straight into the frost webbed tunnel as a murder corridor. Going through the tunnels forces the dwarves into a single file line and as they get strung out working their way through the hatchling rain shards of frost needles dealing dex damage in a hailfire from nearly invisible archers. They are employing much the same tactics used against the pcs…strafing and moving. They don’t really kill anything but they sure slow down and hamper the assault of dwarves. Fast Healing recovers the physical damage, but the stat damage is tolling up all over the place. The reduction in reflex saving throws pays dividends when they emerge into the showroom proper…as this lets Icy-Eights breath weapon take a wider swathe of targets airborne and deposit them into the webs.

The ones thrown into the webs are sniped until paralyzed, and those who make the saves are swarmed by Dis and Doc. Anything remotely resembling a leader or higher level/geared target is enervated by the clerics and slaughtered by the dragon. They take a heavy toll against the dwarf forces but don’t bag any prime targets, Like Russ, Gup, or Reggie.

As the dwarves begin a retreat they frantically communicate to the hatchlings still in the murder tunnel to focus everything on those working their way out…they manage to paralyze the rearguard and they act as a stopper preventing more from escaping. Some are able to brute force their way in a dogpile to break through…but this tangles more into the webbing and leaves their backs vulnerable to additional poison.

A hasty skeletonization occurs upon already desecrated ground (Hades kept busy while they left and desecrated a prep ground) they stand up almost 20 dwarves as 1 HD mooks…and then hurl themselves into a second assault against the fleeing and injured were dwarves. Suddenly Azzie’s eyes perk up…and he straight up jumps on top of his chair and busts out some mean air guitar…

Azzie: About bloody time. A proper audience. (from an iphone comes the song Crazy Train)….time to inspire some f***ng courage mates…

Seraphim: I didn’t think that affected undead…it’s mind affecting.

Azzie: Yer wrong there love…got mi own brand of music and it’s right up their alley.

Turns out Dirge Bard does affect undead with it’s affects and as an Aasimer favored class bonus can boost inspire courage as if a higher level. It get’s Azzie to the next higher tier and it then provides a +3 to hit +3 to damage boost for the mooks. Which is a nice little bonus to already buffed undead mooks.

He leads his newfound groupies back into the fray and hurl themselves back at the dwarfs. The mooks are used as strictly that…bodies to clog space and chisel away at health totals. Doc and Dis pick a target and slash it to ribbons while the twins pour negative energy into the mass…Azzie continues his song while sending arrows over Dis’s shoulder. They are relentlessly winnowing away and staying aggressive trying to keep the dwarf platoon off balance. They rout the leaderless were dwarves and take back control of Moo-Dor…The named generals of the dwarf platoon are MIA.

They mass up their undead as a defensive wall and then pile up the new corpses to animate. These fresh undead are treated as pack mules and they are loaded to their limit with the previously abandoned goods.

A convoy of dwarfs laden with trade goods and supplies along with some treasure returns to the white dragon’s lair where a tithe is proudly offered.

Such is the way in which their new alliance is forged…

*Going out of my way to include Azzie’s randomness…cause…well…it was hilarious to me.