I hate the whole mentality people get of just "be more understanding, can't you see <<other person>> is having a hard time?"

I mean, I get it. But it often seems like it never ends. You can give and be kind and understanding until you have nothing left emotionally for yourself. And still when you reach out to someone else for help, you are chastised for not being understanding enough.

I also hate how the provision of physical or financial assistance, or on the flip side one finding one's self in need of it, is seen to justify inappropriate emotional demands. There's often a mentality that if it was really that bad, you'd obviously find some way out. If you've looked and aren't finding a way out that's better, obviously you're just making excuses or whining. You ought to be grateful for the assistance, and being grateful precludes offering any criticism of the person providing it.