Realizations that make you feel really stupid

[Anonymouswizard]

When I walk into the restaurant I go to regularly, the maitre d' calls me by name and seats me instantly, the server brings me my chips and my coffee when she first appears, and my meal is already being cooked. That's what I'm tipping for.

So you tip because you get the expected service? Or well, expected service for a place you frequent.

To clarify, I'm not against tipping. I like to tip, I did it during my student days and ate out less than most of my friend to compensate. I'm against expected tipping, the idea that I should do it because I care about the server being able to make rent. Because I should not be the one doing so, that should be the employer.

Note that over here not only are restaurant meals significantly more expensive than eating at home, tipping is being formalised as a 'service charge' and being added directly to card payments (although sometimes you get the option to refuse). I'm completely fine with this, I just wish they'd increase the price of the meals by the 10% they do the service charge for. I've seen people tip twice before, the automated tip on the card payment and an extra few quid for excellent service.

I think the last time I didn't tip was because it was excellent service, once we'd been given menus. But the menus took half an hour, which meant we were late for our play, and so we weren't in the best mood when we left.

For a year working in England, I managed to receive that exact same service on a daily basis, without any tipping. The service was excellent not because I bribed the servers but because they were consummate, well-remunerated professionals.

Perhaps the strangest conceit of American tipping culture is that it is somehow improves the service received. I have been in restaurants in over a dozen countries across three continents, and I can safely assert that the US is nowhere near the top in most metrics, and right at the bottom in at least a couple.

Grey Wolf

Yeah, I've strangely noticed that here in the UK the one restaurant I'll regularly eat at that's anti-tipping also has the best service of the bunch, in one case noticing that my friend and I were students and talking about going somewhere afterwards and so giving us our bill while we were eating. I've met servers who take pride in giving good service not because they get large tips but because they want customers to be happy. Heck, I've met barmen who refuse tips (which are generally of the 'and get yourself a drink' variety) or just treat the tip as a normal purchase.

Note that the restaurant I was in that gave the best service was a vegetarian place in San Francisco (did I get it right Mr 2D8HP?), but that was because we arrived and our server immediately recognised my Granny as her old maths teacher, meaning it began with 'let me get you the best table that's not taken Mrs [redacted]'.

Heck, I used to think my country's Healthcare was bad. But then I took a look at America and was immediately glad for what I have.