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2007-03-27, 10:18 PM (ISO 8601)
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#1
Bugbear in the Playground
Feedback to author
Hey, lemme say first the good things.
Great art. I like the style.
Good world. I'm looking forward to seeing more of it.
Good characters. A lot of readers will relate to the protagonist, and bad guys on the good team are very in vogue right now.
And now the bad things. Well, thing, really.
Sllllooooooooowwwwww. Strip #37 was completely wasted on nothing. There wasn't even a punch line. Just hints as to what might happen and what we and the protagonist might learn (about nohting really important anyway) in future strips. No development. Nothing learned. Pacing is vital, and Erfworld's pacing is coming across as very inconsistent right now. There are too many strips where nothing really happens, but unlike other strips, there's no humour to make up for it.
Right now, the strip isn't daily passing the "Why did I write this strip in this way?" test. If you can't answer that question, then you've got a strip that doesn't need to see the light of day.