There is a bit of a underlying argument going on here. The split between popularity making something good or not is well trodden, if that is the crux of the disagreement better to just let it be as no one is getting convinced.
For all of 30 seconds of the movie. We see a much longer scene about Ben dying then anyone else, including the effective parents of two of the main characters.
Leia also comes out of torture, witnessing her life being destroyed and then solitary confinement in perfect shape. Quipping, perfect hair buns, ready to soothe Kenobi's death for Luke. In Empire when the crew gets tortured they come out angry and disheveled, with some physical ailments like Chewy being blind.
I'm not saying that A New Hope needed to be grim dark, but those are losses that would shake most people and they get totally glossed over.