What's this? Blasphemies! More and more colorful blasphemies are cropping up left and right. Cat Pantheon? Primordial Elder Cat? Some sort of all encompassing Cat?

I was content to let you, the weak willed pitiful mortals you are, to delude yourselves into thinking there's anything but the cold void filled with an uncaring, malevolent force beyond your ken (which happens to be our dread lord), for that was going to give your souls the favored flavor of despair 'n horror when my terrible master names you catnip. However, your heretical insistence on fabricating ever more colorful lies to delude yourself with is causing others to fall into your folly as well. Heresy and blasphemy in this thread is increasing with an irritating rate, sweeping up the other weak willed and eroding the resolve of those strong enough to accept the reality of our ultimate insignificance in the eyes of great and terrible lord Snuggles. This is simply unacceptable. I cannot sit idly by while our most sacred creeds are being defied.

I say: NO MORE!

The time has come to show you; the foul Rexites, the deluded fools following "the Good Cat", the blasphemous preachers of some all encompassing Cat, lost and damned heretics worshipping false cat idols and the misguided cultists of the splinter sect of Primordial Elder Cat; the error of your beliefs!

I, the first one to be heralded as the prophet of the One True Snuggles, name thee CATNIP!

IT IS TIME! True followers of the terrible lord Snuggles! THE MOMENT OF GLORY APPROACHES! TO ARMS! PREPARE THYSELVES FOR THE UNHOLY CRUSADE AGAINST ALL WHO REFUSE THE TRUTH OF SNUGGLES!!! STEEL THYSELVES FOR THE GRUELING TASK OF CRUSHING HERETICS INTO CATNIP.

NOT IN HERE, THE DESECRATED THREAD OF OUR TERRIBLE MASTER SNUGGLES, WILL WE SUFFER THE EXISTENCE OF HERETIC! NOT NOW, NOT EVER!!!