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Thread: The Homebrewer's Extended Signature

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    Lix Lorn's Avatar

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    Feb 2010
    Usaki City, Syona

    Default Re: The Homebrewer's Extended Signature

    My new homebrew compendium, including updated and new material.

    Now compiled here

    D&D 3.5
    Base Classes
    The Beastmaster: Similar to a druid, with far less spellcasting, and far more animals tearing your opponents into small pieces.
    The Ghostblade: A combat class with the ability to shoot people using his soul-among other things.
    The Muscle Mage: A spellcasting class that may not hit things very often, but when it does, they die. (Revamp'd!)
    The Shrewd Tactician, Noble Guardian and Proud Warrior. Fighter replacements with radical ideas-like a BAB higher than full, and Save Or Dies that aren't magic. Epic Progression.
    The Souledge, a Soulknife/bow fix.
    The Axe Mystic, the arcane equivalent to the Souledge.
    The Divine Pennant, the divine version of the above.
    The Antithesis, a Nothing themed class made for a contest.
    A tweak to the Warmage, hopefully boosting it a little.
    The Wolfguard, the guard's answer to the Cat Burglar. Buffed a little, should now be interesting at low levels.
    The Worldrender, a base class that attacks abstract concepts.
    The Fatetamer, a Charisma based initiator.
    The Devotee, essentially a Divine Sorcerer. Made so I can play an FE monk without being Wis based.
    The Paladin. Cause everyone has to make one some time.
    The Ascetic, a vaguely psionic and slightly monkish class that believes fervently in mind over matter.
    The Generalist, a class that focuses on doing everything reasonably, and having more feats than it can use.
    The Radiant, a light themed invoker based on the LoL character Leona-and her foe Diana.
    The Swarmlord. Now you too can be the Queen of Blades.
    Proud Warrior remake! Weaker (read: less overpowered) than the original, but hopefully more options, to make it more fun to build and play.
    The Draconic Adept, mixing the Dragon Shaman and the Dragonfire Adept into one dragony class. Also includes fixed half-dragon.
    The Mystic Hand, an arcane monk class.
    The Alchemist, which does what it says on the tin.
    The Divine Crusader, a Paladin/Divine Fighter/Soulknife, which began as a fix of the Divine Spear and snowballed a different way.
    The Cardcaller, a class and magic system based on the game Lost Kingdoms. NOW NOMINALLY COMPLETE
    The Songsmith, a Bard rework to make it more about music. Leans a little heavy caster as opposed to rogue.
    The Socialite, a rogue/beguiler-ish class themed around con-artists and magical disguise.

    The Master of the Tattoo-Born, an explicitly powerful class to build a campaign and a party around.

    Talent Classes
    The Emblem Dark Mage, Sorcerer, and Summoner, a base class and two PrCs based on Fire Emblem's Dark tome wielders. Comes with rules for the CR 3 Raven Swarm.
    The Emblem Pegasus Knight, Falcon Knight, and Dark Flier, a base class and two PrCs based on Fire Emblem's sweet fliers.
    The Emblem Myrmidon, Swordmaster, and Assassin, a base class and two PrCs from the masters of swords in Fire Emblem.
    The Emblem Laguz, a class focused on the use and improvement of shapeshifting progress, based on the Laguz and the Taguel.
    The Emblem Archer, which is self-explanatory. Also features Sniper and Bow Knight.

    The ToME Oozemancer, guardian of nature.

    The Oracle, viewer of the future and understander of strange things.

    Prestige Classes
    The Jewelcaster, a magic using class that stores its spells for when it needs them-not to mention everyone elses. Also has variants on two psionic powers, and a Jewel-forming conjuration.
    The Blaze Adept and the Frostwielder, two opposed elemental magic users.
    The Cold-Fury Archer, for the archers who ball up their rage until it's an icy chip within them... and then strike.
    The Flashblade, a magical warrior who uses teleportation to strike in the blink of an eye. Repeatedly.
    The Invisible Blade, a Gish who fights with an invisible weapon.
    The Blade of Arcane Felinity, crossing Bhu's Cat Burglar with DragoonWraith's Swordmage.
    The Euphoric, a class based around the Wilder's Surging Euphoria.
    The Pyrokineticist. I like fire. Don't you? Such an awesome idea shouldn't have such a cruddy PrC.
    The Mage of Blades, because while the Jade Phoenix Mage is fun, it's very specific in its fluff.
    Lord of the Wild, for the king who rules the beasts and trees.
    The Unleashed, a PrC based on Syndra, and the first example of what I tentatively call a prestige destiny, an ACF to let you use a PrC's fluff from level one.
    The Wand Master, a crafting PrC that is mildly obsessed with Wands.
    Wielder of the Anima, a PrC based on the game Sins of a Solar Empire. Complete with bare-bones Advent race.
    The Shining Princess, a pure-evoking theurge for the Tome of Radiance.
    Shadowdancer fix!
    The Many As One, which is technically a base class but doesn't work on it's own. Based on the Tome of Radiance. The Empath+ for gestalt.
    The Storm of Blades, a shuriken specialist. Also includes the Typhoon Shuriken, which is a giant version of the weapon.

    Alternate Class Features
    Arcane Healing/Inflicting for Sorcerers.

    The Onoka, a template that converts one character into two characters, who are opposites in many ways.
    The Manakete, a draconic race from Fire Emblem. Complete with Dragonstone items.
    The Tentacular! A tentacle monster with a top hat. What more could you want?
    The Tresmortic, Necromantic beings that die three times before it sticks.
    Valley Dwarves, russian dwarves with an affinity for cold and wolves.
    Slimegirls! Also includes monsters.
    Half Dragon fix, with the Draconic Adept.
    The Stranger, Owthro's Ozodrin in race form.
    The Crystalline, a memory altering construct race.

    'Lesser' Project
    The Mimette, a (mostly) humanoid version of the Mimic.
    The Wolfkin, an LA 0 lycanthrope template/race.
    The Marissic, a lesser form of medusa with reasonable LA.
    The Estilkians, who are essentially goo-people.
    The Equitarians, lesser Centaurs.
    The Fiendish, a race of demon-touched who use a mass of feats to mimic their ancestors.
    The Seraphic, the good-aligned version of the Fiendish. For style points, a half-fiend Seraphic gets both sets of feats. Now also includes a homebrew archon, and some feats for shield users.
    Lesser Harpies, Lesser Phoenixes, and avians galore. Protip: Exploding is a viable combat strategy.
    The Nymphic, the lesser nymph/elemental. Also made the Forest-Touched redundant.

    Slivers! I adore Slivers.
    Slimes! Also includes racial templates.

    ToB Disciplines
    Raging Dragon, a draconic themed barbarian discipline.
    Fate's Hand, a card themed discipline with touches of fate and space/time. Includes weaponised cards item!
    Nature's Wrath, a Druid Gish's heart's desire.
    Sanguine Hand, a murderous, sadistic discipline about blood and cruelty.

    Great Speed. Simple way to boost your speed. Final version by Arran Banks.
    Elemental and Polarised Soul, feats to change the damage type dealt by Soulknives and Soulbows.

    The Singing Blade, a masterwork property that allows a weapon to be used to fight, and to Perform, even to use Bardic Music mid-combat.
    Twinned Weapons, to slightly reduce the Bank Breaking of trying to enchant multiple weapons.
    Mighty, Striking, and Featherweight weapons. Simple.

    Tomes, as described by Fire Emblem.
    And other Fire Emblem Weapons.
    Staffs, as described in Tales of Maj'Eyal.
    And now mindstars too!

    Wind Based Evocation, for that lovely feeling you can only get by making your enemies collide for lovely, lovely d10s of damage.

    Alternate Rules
    Eldritch Blast Metamagic, exactly what it says on the tin. Want an Energy Admixtured Hellrime Spear of the Three Thunder-ed Utterdark? Now you can.

    Serena, the Innocent's Shield - Magical Girl deity

    Little Pieces
    Google document containing small things, including swords-on-a-chain and Detect Vitality.

    And also, the quotes I couldn't fit in my normal sig.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bisected8
    I have so much caffeine in my system at any given moment, I'm not entirely sure dying would stop me.
    Quote Originally Posted by MasamuneSSX
    Quote Originally Posted by Lycan 01
    Roland just endorsed a crack pairing?
    Did... did we break the universe?
    In the words of the Joker -"We took the forum's White Knight and we brought him down to our level."
    Quote Originally Posted by Magikeeper View Post
    > Something that allows him to approach non-combat tasks the way he approaches combat. He will nearly die baking that cake, but heaven help us if it isn’t the most kickass cake ever.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kuma Kode
    I've actually been looking for a decent unarmed class that isn't based around some kind of eastern lore. It seems Wizards of the Coast believe the Japanese invented the punch.
    Quote Originally Posted by BRC View Post
    Also, how reliant (on clerics) are we talking. Is this "Strap a gnome cleric to your back or else you're dead meat" or "Buy the party healer a wand of CLW and a box of chocolates"?
    Quote Originally Posted by golentan View Post
    Don't ask stupid questions. You're you.

    You're awesome, regardless. All other descriptors are simply definitions of the means by which that awe is expressed.
    (FTR, He wasn't talking to me, it was just an excellent line.)
    Quote Originally Posted by DracoDei View Post
    While I am at it, have a joke feat
    Vapid Shot
    Some people achieve supreme accuracy by entering a state known as "No Mind", their judgment and inner peace helping them reach this state (Zen Archery Feat)... You take a rather different route to this same state, never having had a mind to begin with.
    Benefits: Subtract your intelligence modifier from all your ranged attack rolls (so a negative INT MOD gives a bonus to hit).
    Normal: Being a moron doesn't make you a better shot...
    Quote Originally Posted by Le-vante View Post
    My Good aligned cleric was turned into a Vampire! I am a little unsure about what will happen to him and so is my DM.
    Quote Originally Posted by Project_Mayhem View Post
    It's now necessary to put ranks in Craft (Emo Poetry), and Hide (Dignity).
    Quote Originally Posted by Cizak View Post
    I always knew there was something bothering me with the last page, and know I know what it is! Why the heck is Ben's fingers grown together?
    Quote Originally Posted by Elagune View Post
    Ben's fingers are grown together due to a birth defect that only appears every 4 chapters. It's very tragic.
    Read. That. Comic. XD
    Quote Originally Posted by AtwasAwamps View Post
    Cleric: “Haven’t you done enough heroics for the day?”

    Paladin, stonefaced, with water dripping off his face and still coughing up liquid as he runs: “Nope. Paladin.”
    Go read that post. XD
    Quote Originally Posted by Psycho View Post
    Skeletons are evil because they literally RUN ON EVIL. They don't have moral values, its they just happen to be powered by the tears of orphans.
    Quote Originally Posted by OracleofWuffing View Post
    Play druid, get animal companion, give animal companion to another party member, get new animal companion, give animal companion to another party member, get new animal companion, give animal companion to another party member, get new animal companion, give animal companion to another party member...

    Give it enough time, and either your DM will stop this thing, or your players will crush the world under badgers. Either way, everyone wins.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dogmantra View Post
    Sexuality is such a varied thing that to plot it on a graph you'd need at least five more dimensions than actually exist.
    Quote Originally Posted by PersonMan View Post
    I'm home alone on the second day of summer break. Look up "busy" in the Thesaurus, and my (beautiful, amazing, charismatic) face is in the "antonyms" section.
    Quote Originally Posted by mucat View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Zanaril View Post
    But why should dwarves have an accent, any more than any other race? And why should in be a stereotypical Scottish accent?
    It's not, actually. Scotsmen have a stereotypical Dwarfish accent.
    Quote Originally Posted by Blue Ghost View Post
    in soviet russia, thog quote YOU!!
    Quote Originally Posted by Phae Nymna View Post
    In other news, I thought that Minnesota (State) Senator Paul Koering's casual dinner date with a pornstar is not only adorable, but a good example that:

    A) Gays are perfectly normal people and should be treated as such.
    B) Politicians are perfectly normal people and should be treated as such.
    C) Pornstars are perfectly normal people and should be treated as such.
    Quote Originally Posted by Zeful View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Fayd View Post
    What is IN that potion?
    Apparently another personality.
    Quote Originally Posted by Eve from Bibliography, by Elagune
    Do your glasses inhibit your natural sarcasm or something? Are you sarcasm man right now?
    Quote Originally Posted by Darths And Droids
    20 XP is a tragedy, but 20,000 XP is a levelling-up statistic.
    Quote Originally Posted by balistafreak View Post
    (A story of epic proportions. With frogs. Just read it.)
    "When the guy upstairs talks, people listen even if they're on fire."

    In this case, the guy upstairs is a book.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gez View Post
    The Green Knight was a guy who got his head cut off for fun.

    He made a game out of this: he challenged someone to what could appropriately be called a head-off: first, someone cut his head off with an axe, then he himself cut the other guy's head off with an axe as well. Normal people generally assumed they would win by default after the first round, but they ended up losing at the second round, chased by a headless guy wielding an axe while a disembodied head on the ground is laughing and telling them to stay still or they're cheaters.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nano
    Yes, because I like to stalk people on internet forums before getting them to have crazy tentacle sex with me for stat bonuses.
    Quote Originally Posted by ocel View Post
    Tzeentch, whose aspect resembles that of a humanoid raven, kind of like Asmodeus, only insane, and mainly schemes against others and himself, like a chess variant of solitaire.
    Quote Originally Posted by jiriku View Post
    Dude. You don't want to steal? When it comes to homebrew, I steal everything that isn't nailed down. And anything I can pry up with a crowbar doesn't count as nailed down.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kaylee and Wash, from Firefly
    'Wash, tell me I'm pretty...'
    'Were I not married, I would take you in a manly fashion.'
    '...cause I'm pretty?'
    'Cause you're pretty.'
    Quote Originally Posted by The Demented One View Post
    On the other hand, most Abyssal Exalted rarely face moral dilemmas at all in their lives. If presented with a magical sword of great power that hungered for the souls of the innocent, their only point of contention would be that hey, they had totally seen those souls first, and had called dibs. But hey, it's no big deal. We can split it. I'll have sausage on my half. Or something to that effect. Perhaps the only way to force an Abyssal Exalt into a moral dilemma would be to confront them with two bags–one full of babies, the other of kittens–and tell them that they can only throw one into a lake of hellfire and sulfur (the traditional Abyssal solution to this dilemma involves cleaving the person holding the bags of assorted squishy things in half, and then throwing in both bags.)
    Quote Originally Posted by Me and Dogmantra
    Me-My sister's a Monk/Artificer.
    Mantra-That's like a peashooter/nuke.
    Quote Originally Posted by OzyandMillie
    'It is not absense of fear, but mastery of it, that marks the brave.'
    'Not dragon teeth marks?'
    'No, they mark the slow.'
    Quote Originally Posted by Murdim View Post
    I think it should be a matter of self-definition. This should be up to every yeast colony to define itself as top-fermenting, middle-fermenting, bottom-fermenting, non-fermenting, any other term that suits it best, or to reject the use of labels altogether if it wishes so.
    Quote Originally Posted by Me
    Note to self: Nerf monks.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kneenibble View Post
    My higher self once told me that he finds clothes a distraction in the pursuit of spiritual and intellectual fulfillment. I replied that I find spiritual and intellectual fulfillment a distraction in the pursuit of clothes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cardea
    I speak in binary, you speak in colours.
    Quote Originally Posted by 3.5 Tier List
    If they're melees and you're a Cleric, don't turn into Godzilla and smash Tokyo. It's not polite.
    Quote Originally Posted by 3.5 Tier List
    A CW Samurai is going to have a lot of trouble in a party full of Tier 3s and up, so maybe try being a Necropolitan CW Samurai 10/Zhentarium Fighter 10 with Imperious Command, Eviscerator, Improved Critical, and a pair of Lifedrinker Kukris. Carve out a niche where you're the king... they can have everything else. Also, make sure you've got something to do when you do have to sit out. Give your character a drinking habit or something.
    Quote Originally Posted by (Siosilvar) Will Tyler View Post
    The reason lightning doesn't strike twice in the same place is that the same place isn't there the second time.
    Quote Originally Posted by BRC View Post
    He who fights with shippers might take care lest he thereby become a shipper. And if you gaze for long into a fanart, the fanart gazes also into you.
    Quote Originally Posted by TheFallenOne View Post

    Sorry, couldn't let this opportunity pass
    Quote Originally Posted by Eldan View Post
    Your weapon can cut any of the following:
    Atomic bonds, light, sounds, time, space and abstract concepts.
    Quote Originally Posted by Blue Ghost View Post
    I think I just had a goodgasm.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock, Paper, Cynic
    There are only three things in life that last forever. Faith, hope, and love-but only love holds your hair back while you vomit.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cardea
    The implications of the sexually hungry Necromantic Flying Serpent and the Tentacle-Spawning Knight of Lust/Wrath mounting it is mildly disturbing.
    Quote Originally Posted by Solan View Post
    Even though I noticed there's a half-fiend monster class, may we still use the template?

    Also, would a half-fiend, half-dragon, lolth-touched drow be too complex?
    Quote Originally Posted by BladeofOblivion View Post
    Where does the Drow come from? How does that work?
    Quote Originally Posted by Bulwer View Post
    Half fiend.

    Half dragon.

    All drow.

    Touched By Lolth premieres Tuesday at 7PM on ABC.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kobold-Bard View Post
    I'm Half-Illithid/Half-Dragon/Half-Fiend/Spellwarped/Half-Golem Ethergaunt of Legend. I think you'll be fine

    (Ive fluffed it as the unusual location were starting in mutating him rather than assorted races playing weird sex games before the Celestial Crusade).
    Quote Originally Posted by Roc Ness View Post
    ... A greater evil than you, there never has been.
    Quote Originally Posted by Zombiegleemax
    The immortality option is less pleasant when you're stuck in a void, lost forever. You don't mind the peace and quiet, but it become hard to level up. Maybe your DM will let you tackle CR 29 math problems or something.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cardea View Post
    >Some Excellent Shakespeare best served by following the post link<
    Quote Originally Posted by Lord_Gareth View Post
    You'll get six different answers to the Good question from only five DMs.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gorgondantess View Post
    Well, not here! Here we push bottons! Here we change the guidelines, break the rules! HERE WE USE AVERAGE SAVES AND ODD SKILL POINTS PER LEVEL! WHO'S WITH ME?
    Quote Originally Posted by BRC View Post
    "Doctor Jeckyl and Misses Eve" is MORE likely than "Eve is acting tough in front of the Page Gang"?

    There's a chap named Occam here to speak with you, and he's got a knife.
    Quote Originally Posted by Blue Ghost View Post
    Lix and Miko?
    How would that work out?
    Quote Originally Posted by HypoSoc View Post
    Lix would find a way.
    Quote Originally Posted by KerfuffleMach2 View Post
    ...yeah, she would. Even if she had to make one up.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kumo View Post
    "Hey Miko! It's date-a-sinner day! and i just kicked a puppy!"
    Quote Originally Posted by Ralasha View Post
    6 seconds, 2640 attacks. Welcome to optimized powergaming.
    Quote Originally Posted by Gez View Post
    Sirens were bird women with fascinating singing voice. Harpies were bird women with horrible shrieks. Mermaid were fish women.

    Then later harpies, who wanted to have exclusive monopoly on the bird woman niche, struck a secret pact with the mermaids. They shuffled secret funds to the mermaids, which used it for a surprise hostile takeover of the sirens. Ever since then, Siren Ltd. has been just a brand name for Mermaid Inc., and it is no longer present on the bird woman market as convened with Harpy Co.
    Quote Originally Posted by Bhu View Post
    You've been playing poker in a bar all day with a cat, when some guy busts in and accuses the cat of sleeping with his wife. After which the bar stares at him for several long moments before beating him senseless and chucking him back outside. The cat winks at you, and your confident sense that all is well with the universe crumbles like stinky cheese.
    Quote Originally Posted by happyturtle View Post
    It's like Nexus says 'Hmm... need moar catpeople' and sends out a bunch of inspiration tendrils.
    Quote Originally Posted by horngeek View Post
    Of course, the only thing more awesome than Kung Fu political debates is Kung Fu GIANT MECHA political debates. "MY POLICY WILL PIERCE THE HEAVENS!"
    Quote Originally Posted by horngeek View Post
    Essentially, the Sidereal expression of the Great Curse means that Sidereal Big Ideas never turn out well.

    Quote Originally Posted by WhiteKnight777 View Post
    The Ebon Dragon, after all, is the very incarnation of treachery. Perhaps the greatest act of dedication one can perform to him is to betray him.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lix Lorn View Post
    She's an Exalted. Physics sits down in the corner and cries at her whim.
    I'm not normally just a narcissist; it was too awesome. XD
    Quote Originally Posted by VampireRot View Post
    I don't think she understands the concept of OOC and IC knowledge. The fourth wall's been looted, maties.
    Quote Originally Posted by Beans View Post
    First person to design a Surprise Elemental gets my everlasting love.

    Start your engines.
    Blue Ghost is the most wonderful, kindest person. I adore him.
    Quote Originally Posted by Grey_Wolf_c View Post
    Gray is a color, grey is a colour.
    Quote Originally Posted by Manual of Exalted power: Lunars
    Many things are unable to comprehend the Lunar’s message or respond, such as rocks, but he can still communicate with them easily.
    Quote Originally Posted by kamikasei View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by Hyudra View Post
    Elder evils shouldn't be a comparable balancing point, anyways.
    Quote Originally Posted by Keveak View Post
    Which is part of my thesis on Danish being an elaborate prank that got out of hand.
    Quote Originally Posted by boj0 View Post
    When you absolutely need something destroyed, Red Lantern Garchomp.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Magtok View Post
    I noticed recently that Magtok has a lot of stuff in his MagCave. I can't help but think that he's planning something big, and hasn't told me about it yet.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lix Lorn View Post
    "Do you know how I got these scars? I was dancing to impress my girlfriend, you see, and I tripped up and landed on a pair of knives. Everyone stopped dancing, staring in horror as I stood up slowly, took the knives out, just kept on dancing and asked Why. So. SERIOUS?"
    Quote Originally Posted by HalfTangible
    Lix can seduce the sun from the sky. We call this daily activity 'sunset'
    Quote Originally Posted by Reynard
    Yes. But why would you use someone with App4+ as anything but a sex slave?
    Quote Originally Posted by TheFallenOne View Post
    One day, Naruto will have the perfect Rasengan: infused with all 6 elements, with homing, super speed, invisibility, 100 mile blast zone and a built in DVD player.

    Unfortunately, he will need 59 assisting clones to perform it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Dragnar
    Malfeas: He stabs you in the back by stabbing you all the way through your front.
    Quote Originally Posted by Guancyto
    You want the God of Having Too Many Weapons to look at you and go, 'Yeah, she's got enough dakka.'
    Quote Originally Posted by Random_Person
    I would tell you that you have a dirty mind, but that's common knowledge. Except when you're just adorable.
    Quote Originally Posted by Thanqol View Post
    And now, I can suddenly see the entire series of The Collective's Diminutive Equine: Camaraderie Is Required writing itself before my eyes. It's beautiful. Like a glorious road with victory at it's end.
    Quote Originally Posted by PhoeKun View Post
    Live by the ship, die by the ship.
    Quote Originally Posted by Raz_Fox View Post
    Hope is a phoenix. You can never really kill it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Fifty-Eyed Fred View Post
    As I had to explain to the police, any number of them could have been going to St Ives, but I was the only one I can say with certainty was going there at the time.
    Quote Originally Posted by ScionoftheVoid View Post
    Also, thread opening mindscrew time: CelestiaxIronHoofCelestia. You could call it...

    *puts on sunglasses*

    ...a benevolent/dictator 'ship.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kyouhen View Post
    Ah, math. The only area where you can create something called an Imaginary Number and use it to prove yourself right. I swear they actually stopped trying to make math sound like something real when they invented the Imaginary Number. It's like they realized nobody was going to call them out for making things up and just stopped caring.
    Quote Originally Posted by turkishproverb View Post
    I am not getting into a shootout with Golentan. Too many gun-arms.
    Quote Originally Posted by SiuiS View Post
    The entire point of all games pokemon is to slowly perfect Charizard.
    Quote Originally Posted by MasamuneSSX View Post
    Lix doesn't strike me as being a succubus. She seems more like a female version of Cupid that upgraded her bow to a minigun.
    Quote Originally Posted by TheCountAlucard View Post
    Hell, in a world where your fridge could be raided by a meschlumian raksha, you'd better have a destructive beam weapon option for it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Midnight Lurker View Post
    Inyssius? Draconi? Would you two please stop agreeing with each other at the top of your lungs?
    Quote Originally Posted by HomestuckRP
    [20:31] woodlandWanderer: Have you got fast food on your Troll planet?
    [20:31] cambysianTome: some of the things there are harder to catch than others
    Quote Originally Posted by Beans
    you're just like
    the most adorable thing
    maybe I'll just climb through the computer screen and hug you
    ow ---- this computer screen is hard
    when i hit it with my face
    Quote Originally Posted by Beans
    it's like you're uh
    one of those wax-melter aroma things
    and the aroma is the adorbable
    and the stuff that ends up smelling nice is everything you touch
    Quote Originally Posted by Even Human View Post
    Lix - I'd help, but I don't know how to do interventions against awesome.
    Quote Originally Posted by Vael
    DnD 3.5 is like the fast food of video games. It's horrible for you and you know it, but you keep going back anyway. =P
    Quote Originally Posted by Tvtyrant View Post
    It appears that the unstoppable force kicks the immovable object in the nuts and then dances on its head.
    Quote Originally Posted by Aotrs Commander
    I'm pretty sure 2+2 = haddock.
    Quote Originally Posted by Thanqol View Post
    "I'm not biased against masks that aren't possessed or anything. I just haven't met any nonpossessed masks that are also cool."
    Quote Originally Posted by Thanqol View Post
    This. Applejack is two drinks away from being an excellent character.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kyeudo View Post
    Raziere, it looks like you fell into a sarchasm there. Might want to watch out for them better. They're hard to spot on the internet.
    Quote Originally Posted by tbok1992 View Post
    I'm now thinking of a convent of female clerics dedicated to what is essentially writing shipping fanfics for the gods, for some obscure theological reason that would take about an hour to explain. And it is glorious.

    I especially like thinking of the theological schizm resulting from the debate over Grumuush/Lolth OTP Vs. Corellon/Lolth OTP. And don't get me started on those who think that Lolth/Tiamat is the one true way.
    Quote Originally Posted by Morph Bark View Post
    (On the material of dndwiki)
    It was like I was standing on a giant compost heap with my trusty shovel, looking for gemstones and finding just a handful of semi-precious stones. ;_;
    Quote Originally Posted by industrious View Post
    All ST laughter is evil laughter.
    Quote Originally Posted by Graywatch
    "Now have fun and remember unless the bloodloss can fill a bucket in under a minute I don't want to hear about it before noon."
    Quote Originally Posted by Exthalion View Post
    Realm foreign policy for the most part consisted of the Empress informing people, "Don't make me come over there."
    Quote Originally Posted by stsasser View Post
    Nothing happens to Higgs. Higgs happens to things!
    Quote Originally Posted by Draconi Redfir View Post
    He's still the exact same Darth Vader we and the rest of the Star Wars cast are aware of, it's just that when nobody is looking, he likes to cuddle kittens.
    Quote Originally Posted by Winthur View Post
    And for our top story today: Dr. Mundo has sewn Darius's rectal sphincter shut. As we speak, his brother Dr. Aven's making an exit.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kalmageddon View Post
    "You know, if I had blood I would be totally flying right now" says Kalmageddon the skeleton-man at the barman, pouring whisky after whisky through his ribcage, the alcohol forming a puddle on the floor...
    Quote Originally Posted by Thanqol View Post
    It's not normal, of course, and what's actually happening in Comet Kicker's brain is that she's using regular murder as therapy for worse murder. There's a breakdown in the works and all it needs is one good, hard kick.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lix Lorn View Post
    What is Cthulhu's True Name?
    Quote Originally Posted by Magicyop View Post
    Chuck Norris.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kellus View Post
    There is no way you're going to succeed on that Truespeak check.
    Quote Originally Posted by Tacitus View Post
    Even Pun-Pun couldn't make the DC.
    Quote Originally Posted by Thanqol View Post
    It's like the feng shui version of an orbital death laser.

    And pictures/banners.

    Behold the Inconsistency of Lix:

    The Signature
    Lix Lorn of CRITIC, the Manifold Mother and the Great and Powerful Lixie, also known as General Everin Stormclaw of the Many Titles, High Priest of the Crazy Hand, Master of the Emerald Stars and Acolyte of the New Chu Order, High Dragon and the Sixth Sutakage, Bearer of the Prophecy and the Moonrider, Commander of the Blood Talons and Seeker of Self, Queen of Alanjeh and the Last Hairlander, She Who Knows and Servant To That Which Waits, Senshi of the Many Moons and Sailor Elara, Scion of Bramimond, the Vagina-Brand Messiah and She Who Lulz With Cats, The Kinetic Impact and the Red Fist, the Ninja Hippo and She Who Has Glee, Seer of Callan and Mistress of the Bishie Plane, Priestess of the Numberless Gods and Keeper of the EXY Borderline, Harbinger of the Unreal and Sorceress of the Unknown, Master of the Five Styles and Prophet of the Shipping Goddess, Dancer of the Wind and the Nurtured Flame of Life Through Death, Fangirl Among Fangirls and Defier of Birth and Nature, Storm's Companion, Seeker of the Third Dawn and Answer to The Question, Walker of the Countless Paths, and She Who Only Seeks Home.
    Last edited by Lix Lorn; 2014-08-08 at 12:04 PM.
    Recent Homebrew: The Socialite | The Crystalline: Memory Altering Construct Race | Sanguine Hand, a ToB Discipline of blood and cruelty
    Homebrew Signature | NEW Homebrew Collection
    Thanks to all my avatar artists, especially to Paisley for my avatar of Vivian, cowardly cryophoenix.
    Quote Originally Posted by Thanqol View Post
    It's like the feng shui version of an orbital death laser.