[B]Kustom Spelljob - Mind Puppet[/B]

[Rejakor]

Right.

Well, my current character is a necromancery cleric, and he's been doing some experimentation on poor Zeilig (his henchslave) in order to perfect his latest spell.

Mind Puppet

Necromancy (Creation, Mind-affecting)

Level: Cleric 5
Components: V, S, R, M
Casting Time: 24-hour ritual
Range: Touch
Target: One Humanoid
Duration: Permanent
Saving Throw: Fort Partial (see text)
Spell Resistance: Yes.

You can control the actions of one humanoid. This spell necrifies the brain of the target, turning them into an undead under your control. The target must be present for the entire 24-hour ritual, and the ritual requires the application of certain oils or alchemical ingredients to certain parts of the body. The target feels weird, but has no memory of the past days. You can control their memories as a modify memories spell.

The spell creates a telepathic link between you and the target. By concentrating fully on the spell (a standard action), you can receive full sensory input as interpreted by the mind of the subject, though it still can’t communicate with you. You can’t actually see through the subject’s eyes, so it’s not as good as being there yourself, but you still get a good idea of what’s going on. This takes the form of a narrative stream of conciousness.

The target follows both telepathic and spoken instructions, to the exclusion of anything else. Protection from evil or a similar spell can prevent you from exercising control or using the telepathic link while the subject is so warded, but such an effect neither prevents the establishment of mind puppet nor dispels it. The target can be turned or rebuked as a normal undead can. The target keeps it's class levels, feats and skills, and gains no templates.

The target gains a single fortitude save with a DC equal to (10 + Wis + Spell Level + extra 100gp of material components). If they succeed on the fortitude save, instead of being affected by the mind puppet spell, they die. You may only control one mind puppet at a time. If you attempt to create a second mind puppet, the first mind puppet instantly dies upon completion of the ritual.

Material Component: 100gp of rare incense and oils, plus an extra 100gp of onyx per +1 save DC.

[Matthew]

I think that you need to make it clearer as to whether or not a Spell Caster can use this Ritual to control moe than one Mind Puppet.

[Rejakor]

Good idea. Spell amended.

EDIT: Anything else?

[Holocron Coder]

Well, it's a level 5 save-and-die spell. That seems a bit in the wrong level of power, although I cannot suggest anything but 9th level in my lack of wisdom.

[Icewalker]

Bit low level for a permanent mind control. I'd up the spell level. Fun idea, certainly. I like it, killing the brain and putting them under your control.

[Khoran]

This seems like a "Damned if you do, damned if you don't" kinda situation with the Fort Save. Perhaps it could use some re-evaluation so that it dosn't kill you if you pass, so that passing it is still prefered to failing, but there is still a heavy penalty (Con Damage, maybe?)

[Magnor Criol]

Yeah. Isn't this an unavoidable death, in a sense? If your character knows this spell, there's no one he or she can't get rid of given proper time - anyone they dislike, they just have to do the spell and they're either dead, or under your control whereupon you can just tell them to go die. There should be a chance to survive, especially since that DC would be so high.

Perhaps they roll to save, and if they only beat it by a little, they die, and if they beat it by enough they survive with some sort of damage?

Level increase agreed on, as well.

[Rejakor]

Hmm. I guess I need to fix that too. The 24-hour ritual actually requires the subject to be present. Therefore, if you can subdue/trick/capture a person, you can mind-puppet them. Since you would have to be able to get them at your mercy anyway, then you could kill them anyway (coup-de-grace, anyone?). I'll fix the spell soon, can't be bothered at the moment. But, considering that you actually have to capture/trick/subdue someone before you can begin the 24-hour ritual, do you think the spell is over-powered for it's level?

[Khoran]

Hmm. I guess I need to fix that too. The 24-hour ritual actually requires the subject to be present. Therefore, if you can subdue/trick/capture a person, you can mind-puppet them. Since you would have to be able to get them at your mercy anyway, then you could kill them anyway (coup-de-grace, anyone?). I'll fix the spell soon, can't be bothered at the moment. But, considering that you actually have to capture/trick/subdue someone before you can begin the 24-hour ritual, do you think the spell is over-powered for it's level?

Well, for needing you to be there for the whole ritual, I really don't see how that's a problem, since Dominate Person is a 5th level spell too, you could initially dominate them and then submit them to the ritual.

Also, the save-and-die nature of it just dosn't sit well with me, and I doubt it will sit well with your players if they have this cast on them. All of a sudden, they're either a) Dead and probobly a zombie or b) an NPC.

[Rejakor]

Well, I can't insert a "you cannot use this spell on a PC", but i'd hope that could be dealt with out of game. This spell would be extremely limited in use - Necromantic alternative to Dominate Person, really. It's mainly designed for use by evil PC's on the poor, poor NPC's that live in their world.

EDIT: Spell fixed. Any other comments/ideas for making it better?

Also. I understand many people are quibbling about the essentially save-and-die nature of the spell. Do people think thats a bit extreme? Well, considering that you actually have to be able to keep the subject in a room and alive while performing the ritual, i put the save-and-die there as a way to stop characters simply repeating the process again and again until the subject rolls a 1 on their fort save.

[XtheYeti]

i think your right, if you can keep someone in one plcae for 24 hr then you could have killed them there at some point be fore so the save and or die is fine with me

[Rejakor]

Right. Anything else that you think I should change, or can I put it into mass production?