Greatest Fanon Mary Sue ever

[Grey Paladin]

I challenge you to top this

[Sholos]

Okay

[Grey Paladin]

Elminster is not every character ever simultaneously.

[Sholos]

No, but he can beat them. Simultaneously. In his sleep. Also, your guy is dead. Elminster isn't.

[Grey Paladin]

But did he sleep with all of them, despite half of them being himself?

[Sholos]

But did he sleep with all of them, despite half of them being himself?

Huh? I'm not sure what you're referring to.

[Killersquid]

Were you the one who posted it on /tg/? Because I am laughing so hard at the thread right now.

[Grey Paladin]

Nope, just a fellow fa/tg/uy spreading The Word.

[Prime32]

That is indeed every character ever. He's a Vizard Super Saiyan 11 with a Geass, the power of a 1000-tailed fox, snakes and the Sun, and is also a time-travelling god?

[Grey Paladin]

Actually, yes.

He also controls 70% of the world's market and was reincarnated nine times - the ninth form being his dead wife.

[Killersquid]

That may be true, Prime, but can he see why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

[Prime32]

That may be true, Prime, but can he see why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch?

I think he is Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

[chiasaur11]

I think he is Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

That does not give him understanding.

For in truth, can any of us truly know our own natures?

And if one did, would that not make pulling an all you zombies even more disgusting?

[Prime32]

That does not give him understanding.

For in truth, can any of us truly know our own natures?

He is also the Laughing Man.

[Tengu_temp]

Okay

Elminster is a canon Marty Stu. This is about fanon.

[snoopy13a]

Mary Sue?

More like Mary Skinny:

Height 6 ft, 3 inches
Weight 121 pounds

A strong gust of wind would break him in half.

[hanzo66]

Apparently any character made by David Gonterman qualifies as an Author Insert version of this. That and whatshername of "My Immortal".

[Rogue 7]

Oy vey...wish my Naruto character had all those abilities, seeing as how he just got his arm chopped off...

But in all seriousness, is this guy having a laugh? Because this is quite possibly a parody. I'm surprised he didn't randomly get Haku's kekkei genkai for $#^*s and giggles.

[Innis Cabal]

The joys of Shonen....I can't even read that wiki without weeping

[The Glyphstone]

Yeah, I think the only well-known fanon character who can match up to this is the infamous Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way...

[Rogue 7]

The joys of Shonen....I can't even read that wiki without weeping

If you're looking for good Naruto fanfiction...I know a guy.

Well, actually, I've got a link to the TV Tropes page for their recommendations. But I can nominate a bunch of 'em.

[ZeroNumerous]

I dearly, dearly hope this is either exceptional parody or a troll of epic proportions.

[Innis Cabal]

If you're looking for good Naruto fanfiction...I know a guy.

Well, actually, I've got a link to the TV Tropes page for their recommendations. But I can nominate a bunch of 'em.

No! No, i'm cool. I'll just keep reading Bleach thanks

[Rogue 7]

You know, I have yet to read a decent, long Bleach fanfic. I've come across several good short stories and the like, but never anything of epic length. I'm disappointed in this. Which is compounded by the fact that the manga's so gorram lame right now.

[Rutskarn]

That does not give him understanding.

For in truth, can any of us truly know our own natures?

And if one did, would that not make pulling an all you zombies even more disgusting?

This is very zen.

One zen turn deserves another.

A koan:

An pupil studied with an old master on a mountainside. Every day, to fetch water, the two of them would go to the river, crossing a bed of sharp stones in the process.

The pupil noticed that, though the stones were coarse and sharp, the master always walked unshod. Sometimes, the master would trod on a stone, and would nurse his foot for a moment before continuing on.

The student asked the master, "Why is it, master, that though the path be rough and painful, you never wear your shoes?"

And the master replied, "Because I've got a nasty foot fungus, and I have to air it out."

And the pupil was enlightened.

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

*opens link*

*reads half a sentence*

*eyes glaze over*

*makes cursory glance through pictures at side of page*

Okay, this is all rather frightening, and I honestly couldn't get through the first sentence. This is why I stay out of anime. And fanfiction. And fandoms other than the one I'm stuck in in general.

People are nuts.

[Rutskarn]

But if you abstain from fanfiction, you'll miss out on the glory, the pageantry, the epic storytelling of:

Half Life: Full Life Consequences!

But seriously, in history, there has been precisely one fanfiction I've enjoyed non-ironically. And it's not even technically fanfiction.

Observe: the story of Donny the Moron.

http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=1735

[Lord Fullbladder, Master of Goblins]

You make an excellent point, Rutskarn. Full Life Consequences was jovially amusing back when it was a big fad. I'm sure it is just as funny now, but I haven't opened that link in particular.

[chiasaur11]

But if you abstain from fanfiction, you'll miss out on the glory, the pageantry, the epic storytelling of:

Half Life: Full Life Consequences!

But seriously, in history, there has been precisely one fanfiction I've enjoyed non-ironically. And it's not even technically fanfiction.

Observe: the story of Donny the Moron.

http://www.shamusyoung.com/twentysidedtale/?p=1735

Well, if we're going for comical Half Life fanfiction, there actually was a pretty well regarded comic. Looks like it provided at least some inspiration to the animators of those excellent videos.

One of the best webcomics I've read. And it's done, so there's no obligation. Plus, Shamus Young likes it, so there's the exact reason for Rutskarn to read it as there was for many of his readers to start reading the blog.

[SurlySeraph]

I challenge you to top this

Oh God, that's horrible. The author just took the abilities of a bunch of well-known shonen protagonists and gives them all to the character. And then he becomes a god and has sex with every female character. It's like raw anti-creativity. If someone finds a character that can top that, please don't let me know about it.

EDIT: And he's afraid of needles, the most cliched humanizing flaw in a powerful character ever.

EDIT EDIT: He transforms into his own wife? What the hell?