New OOTS products from CafePress
New OOTS t-shirts, ornaments, mugs, bags, and more
Page 3 of 4 FirstFirst 1234 LastLast
Results 61 to 90 of 118

Thread: Chuck Norris

  1. - Top - End - #61
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Because Chuck Norris is awesome. And I got inspired by all the Chuck Norris vs Everyone threads....

    More changes! Adding new abilities, and his stats are now infinity times infinity. Ooo, aaah.

  2. - Top - End - #62
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Akron
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Shapechange -> Chuck Norris. Score!!!

    For the Roundhouse kick (Roundhouse Kick
    An enemy hit by a roundhouse kick must make a DC Infinity fortitute roll, or die instantly. On a successful save, they still die. It's that painful.), I've always wondered if someone can die from just sheer pain alone without actual bodily damage.

  3. - Top - End - #63
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    There is Only Chuck stops that. Sorry. And you die from just attempting it.

  4. - Top - End - #64
    Banned
    Join Date
    Jan 2006

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Chuck caught em all

    When threatened by Chuck Norris, he considers you helpless, since he caught you once already.

  5. - Top - End - #65
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Akron
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Chuck Norris Killed the Dinosaurs
    Chuck Norris may travel back in time as a free action. His attacks are treated as bane weapons against dinosaurs, and all other creatures for that matter, since he's Chuck Norris.

    Awesome
    Chuck Norris's attacks are treated as awesome for the purposes of overcoming all damage reduction.

    w00t I'm a Barbarian in the Playground now, drinks on me!

  6. - Top - End - #66
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Goblin

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Back in the USSR
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by Baskineli

    Unless x is negative...
    True. I was tired at the time. If x is negative and finite, infinity times x or infinity divided by x is negative infinity.

    NullAshton: as discussed on the previous page, infinity * infinity is considered by most to be still the same infinity. InfinityInfinity, however, is generally considered the next larger infinity, which isn't even conceivably possible in D&D rules. Use that.
    Spoiler
    Show

    Stealthy Snake avatar by Dawn
    Lack of images by Imageshack

  7. - Top - End - #67
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Were-Sandwich's Avatar

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Location
    England

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Computer Overload Awesomeness (Ex)
    Bill Gates once wagered Microsoft that Chuck Norris couldn't crash Windows Vista. Accepting this wager, Chuck Norris proceeded to load a Walker Texas Ranger DVD into the drive. Overloaded with its sheer awesomeness, Vista returned the message "All your base are belong to us". Microsoft remains under Bill's name for tax purposes.

    Chuck Norris can crack any code, crash any system, create an exit anywhere, instantly.
    Quote Originally Posted by Count Chumleigh View Post
    Oh.
    Oh, my.
    You just earned seventeen cool points by my reckoning. And I'm so sigging that.
    Cheers,
    --Count Chumleigh

  8. - Top - End - #68
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Karsh's Avatar

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Texas
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Just a question... shouldn't Chuck Norris be an Outsider with the Awesome subtype?

  9. - Top - End - #69
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Great. I think pun-pun killed this thread.

  10. - Top - End - #70
    Orc in the Playground
     
    Umbral_Arcanist's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Rochester NY (kinda)
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by NullAshton
    Great. I think pun-pun killed this thread.

    Does that mean that Pun-Pun can kill chuck norris?

  11. - Top - End - #71
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    No. No it does not.
    Ultimately, there is no other conclusion other than that WOTC purposely emasculated the game to cater to the immature mentality that demands immortal characters and favors mindless power gaming over all else.

  12. - Top - End - #72
    Pixie in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Denmark

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Pun-Pun cannot ever gain infinite stats/damage/whatever, simply because "infinite" is not a value. You can say any value, and pun-puns stats are higher, but they can never reach infinite. You can't do normal math with infinite.

    Of course Chuck Norris laugh at mathematicians, and then roundhouse kicks them back to the blackboard.
    1 Take the prepared chicken and stuff with the egg, which should be hard broiled, and pad out with the coriander. 2 Stuff the lamb with the chicken. 3 Stuff the goat with the lamb. 4 Stuf the camel with the goat. A pre-prepared camel is rather more convenient - don\'t be afraid to ask your butcher.

  13. - Top - End - #73
    Barbarian in the Playground
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Chuck norris now has infinityinfinity stats. Thus, he can kill pun pun easily.

  14. - Top - End - #74
    Troll in the Playground
     
    NEO|Phyte's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Eberron
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by NullAshton
    Chuck norris now has infinityinfinity stats. Thus, he can kill pun pun easily.
    Hot really, he still has 0 capacity to get within range of any of the abilities he has that are capable of harming Pun-pun. Pun-pun can attack anyone from anywhere on any plane, and move to a totally different plane/location within the same round. Chuck has 5' reach and a standard action teleport ability that can be combo'd with an ability that is unable to kill Pun-pun. How exactly does Chuck intend to kill something he can't reach with his oh-so-precious Roundhouse?
    Man this thing was full of outdated stuff.
    Swoop Falcon
    I make(made?) avatars! Last updated 12-23-2008. Requests not unwelcome. Last request 01-12-2010.
    Avatar by me.

  15. - Top - End - #75
    Banned
     
    Zeful's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by NEO|Phyte, Keeper of IRC
    How exactly does Chuck intend to kill something he can't reach with his oh-so-precious Roundhouse?
    Or for that matter someone who sees through the hype?

  16. - Top - End - #76
    Eldritch Horror in the Playground Moderator
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by Zeful
    Or for that matter someone who sees through the hype?
    Chuck Norris decides what you see.

  17. - Top - End - #77
    Banned
     
    Zeful's Avatar

    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by The_Glyphstone
    Chuck Norris decides what you see.
    And I laugh at him for telling me this. When he tries to roundhouse me out of esistance I begin laughing at him again and the blow breaks three ribs(as chuck norris is really that storng). Big deal? No.

  18. - Top - End - #78
    Eldritch Horror in the Playground Moderator
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Spoilsport. :'( :'( :'( You're ruining our fun... ;D :D

  19. - Top - End - #79
    Halfling in the Playground
    Join Date
    Aug 2005

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    There's already a webpage for "Chuck Norris Facts". Why couldn't we just leave it there? It isn't that funny beyond the first time! Hell, the entire WoW community got so pissed off with this meme that even mentioning it will result in you being placed on a very large number of peoples' block lists.

  20. - Top - End - #80
    Halfling in the Playground
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by NEO|Phyte, Keeper of IRC
    How exactly does Chuck intend to kill something he can't reach with his oh-so-precious Roundhouse?
    Because he's Chuck Norris. Sheesh, some people just can't face reality. So how much you want to be the deliberate irony of this post goes right over the heads of those complaining about the Chuck Norris meme?

  21. - Top - End - #81
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Wolf53226's Avatar

    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Milwaukee

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Sorry, Chuck beats Pun-Pun.

    Lets just say that the two get in a fight. Let us even say, Pun-Pun gets the drop on Chuck, wins init and gets to go first, even though that can never happen, which I will explain later. Pun-Pun attacks, physically, with a special power or...what ever. First of, Pun-Pun, as good as he is, needs a natural 20 to hit. Pun-Pun has an attack approaching infinite, but since CN, Chuck Norris will now be refered to as CN and Pun-Pun as PP, has a dex of Infinite, his AC is infinitely high, so there is no way to hit him with out a natural 20. Since only a natural 20 is an automatic hit, even a 19+near infinite, is still less than infinite, so only the 20 hits. We'll even say, PP gets lucky and rolls another 20 to confirm the crit, I haven't read anything to say he can't be crit hit. PP, does near infinite damage, since his near infinite str, but that is still less that the infinite HP that CN has. Now, it is CN's turn, he travels back in time, by giving the space time continum a round house kick, appears in the air above PP, a couple of instances before PPgets his powers, and KILLS him with the punch the ground attack.

    DONE, FIN, ADIOS, AUF WIEDERSEN

    Oh, and since CN's dex is infinite, his init bonus is also infinite, so he can not loss init.

    The shorter method is he goes first, instantly transports to right next to PP, and uses that Vorpal Crush, and since that still effects creature who are immune to crits, and would do infinite damage do to the inifinite str, PP is dead, again.

    And do to his Master of All power, he can bring PP back to life, to do it again, and again, and again.


    {Why did I read this thread....and Why am I taking CN's side...}

    {I sorry Chuck, I meant no disrespect!!!!!! AHHHHHHH}
    Quote Originally Posted by Awakened Gelatinus Cube View Post
    -lituracy is never atomatic
    -"despell magic" is broken into despell magic 1-9
    -genisalt characters are allowed with an xp penilty.
    "When in doubt, set something on fire."

    RIP: Gary Gygax (July 27, 1938 – March 4, 2008) - May the world forever be changed by the things you have created.

    Avatar By: ME

  22. - Top - End - #82
    Troll in the Playground
     
    NEO|Phyte's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Eberron
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by Wolf53226
    Sorry, Chuck beats Pun-Pun.

    Lets just say that the two get in a fight. Let us even say, Pun-Pun gets the drop on Chuck, wins init and gets to go first, even though that can never happen, which I will explain later.
    Wrong. Pun-pun will always go first.

    Pun-Pun attacks, physically, with a special power or...what ever. First of, Pun-Pun, as good as he is, needs a natural 20 to hit. Pun-Pun has an attack approaching infinite, but since CN, Chuck Norris will now be refered to as CN and Pun-Pun as PP, has a dex of Infinite, his AC is infinitely high, so there is no way to hit him with out a natural 20. Since only a natural 20 is an automatic hit, even a 19+near infinite, is still less than infinite, so only the 20 hits. We'll even say, PP gets lucky and rolls another 20 to confirm the crit, I haven't read anything to say he can't be crit hit. PP, does near infinite damage, since his near infinite str, but that is still less that the infinite HP that CN has. Now, it is CN's turn, he travels back in time, by giving the space time continum a round house kick, appears in the air above PP, a couple of instances before PPgets his powers, and KILLS him with the punch the ground attack.
    Since Pun-pun also knows what Chuck will try doing Long before Chuck actually does it, Pun-pun has no trouble preventing such time-travelling shenanigans.


    The shorter method is he goes first, instantly transports to right next to PP, and uses that Vorpal Crush, and since that still effects creature who are immune to crits, and would do infinite damage do to the inifinite str, PP is dead, again.
    As I pointed above, your precious Chuck is incapable of going first unless Pun-pun chooses to delay his action.

    As for vorpal crush, if you read it more carefully, it does no damage, just a decapitation effect as per vorpal. Since Pun-pun has decided to give himself the regenerative traits of, say, the Tarrasque, instead of dieing, he finds himself instead taking nonlethal damage equal to his HP + 10. Or at least, he would if he wasn't immune to nonlethal damage.
    Man this thing was full of outdated stuff.
    Swoop Falcon
    I make(made?) avatars! Last updated 12-23-2008. Requests not unwelcome. Last request 01-12-2010.
    Avatar by me.

  23. - Top - End - #83
    Ogre in the Playground
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Akron
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Could a Pun-pun kill another Pun-pun?

    And if there was an effect that automatically killed anyone who passed a DC 200 Save/Check, thats the way to take out a Pun-pun. ;D

    Now pun-pun only comes from Serpent Kingdoms or are there variants from other faulty WotC products?

  24. - Top - End - #84
    Troll in the Playground
     
    NEO|Phyte's Avatar

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Eberron
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by Maerok
    And if there was an effect that automatically killed anyone who passed a DC 200 Save/Check, thats the way to take out a Pun-pun. ;D
    you can still willingly fail checks ;)
    Man this thing was full of outdated stuff.
    Swoop Falcon
    I make(made?) avatars! Last updated 12-23-2008. Requests not unwelcome. Last request 01-12-2010.
    Avatar by me.

  25. - Top - End - #85
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Skyserpent's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    with Carmen Sandiego.

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    wait... does Chuck have divinity yet?
    Member of a fanclub.

  26. - Top - End - #86
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    bingo_bob's Avatar

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by Zeful
    And I laugh at him for telling me this. When he tries to roundhouse me out of esistance I begin laughing at him again and the blow breaks three ribs(as chuck norris is really that storng). Big deal? No.
    I dunno about that. 3 ribs would be a pretty big deal to me. I'd be on the floor groaning, or in any case performing FAR from my best. Plus, those are ribs that, if you get hit in the same area again, are probably going to do unpleasant things to your internal organs.
    I cannot actually think of anything witty to say here.

    Proud owner of a Gorbatar

    Important 9-11 information
    Spoiler
    Show
    Quote Originally Posted by Crazy_Uncle_Doug View Post
    Wizard: "I move the rock with the power of magic!"
    Psionicist: "I move the rock with the power of my mind!"
    Shadowcaster: "I move the rock with the power of Shadow!"
    Truenamer: "Asknsdfksdfhasdjfhsn!" *rolls a 5* "Blast! Not again."


    Trophy Case
    Spoiler
    Show

  27. - Top - End - #87
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    firepup's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Dungeon of Doom
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norr

    Quote Originally Posted by NEO|Phyte, Keeper of IRC
    OK, so Pun-pun doesn't get the irony of Killing Chuck with his own abilities. Either way, Chuck looses.

    I thought it was an oar to the head? Thats what someone in a thread around here said IIRC.

    :edit: consolidated posts
    and remember they have to appear out of nowhere

  28. - Top - End - #88
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    firepup's Avatar

    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Dungeon of Doom
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Quote Originally Posted by jaqueses
    Mr Rogers still beats Chuck and Pun-Pun.
    he has to be in a blood stained sweater though.

  29. - Top - End - #89
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    Skyserpent's Avatar

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    with Carmen Sandiego.

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    Technically Mr. Rogers did NOT actually kill him, I believe it was:

    Ahem... Gandalf the Gray, Gandalf the White, Monty Python and the Holy Grails Black Knight, Benito Moussolini, the Blue Meanie, Cowboy Curtus, Jambi the Genie, Robocop, Terminator, Captain Kirk, Darth Vader, Lo Pan, Superman, every single Power Ranger, Bill S. Preston, Theodore Logan, Spock, the Rock, Doctor Octopus, and Hulk Hogan...
    Member of a fanclub.

  30. - Top - End - #90
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Goblin

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Back in the USSR
    Gender
    Male

    Default Re: Chuck Norris

    That's Bill S. Preston and Theodore Logan, heathen.

    Whoa.

    Chuck's only vulnerabilities are that particular dogpile, Bruce Lee, and oars.
    Spoiler
    Show

    Stealthy Snake avatar by Dawn
    Lack of images by Imageshack

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •