How would you kill Wolverine?

[Megatron46]

Okay.... now depending on who is writing him Wolvie can be a good, or just a sodding annoying, character! Therefore, the obvious next step is; if he's annoying, how do we kill him?

Questions to consider; can he regrow body parts? Can he regrow his head? Can a light saber cut through adamantium? Can you dislocate an adamantium skeleton and then rip it's arms off (he doesn't have adamantium tendons and muscles)? Can he survive without oxygen?

Any takers please!

[Xondoure]

Very simple; remove plot armor.

If I wasn't going to cop out though, I would probably go with placing him in space to keep his heal factor occupied with oxygen, draw out the adamantine with Magneto, and have Jean Grey Disperse his atoms, and break them down into gold.

[Innis Cabal]

Throw him into the sun. Problem solved

[toasty]

First: lots of tranquilizer darts.

Then: lots of chemicals that will make him stay asleep.

Then: Skin him. With a machine. That way I don't hear the screams or whatever. He should be drugged though.

Erm... he's now a metal skeleton.

[revolver kobold]

This should do the trick. Just replace the tungsten penetrator with adamantium, and if that doesn't kill him, it should slow him down enough so you can quickly think of something else. Like lots of fire.

[North]

Chop him with the Muramasa blade, it ignores his healing factor.

[Trizap]

I would first rip out all of wolverines adamantium bones out his body.

then I would throw all his fleshy parts into the sun.

then I would burn everything that remains, then break down the ashes at the subatomic level.

then I will nuke the area where he died once or twice, just to be sure.

[Alteran]

"Disintegrate!"

...is that cheating? Probably is.

[Trizap]

"Disintegrate!"

...is that cheating? Probably is.

no its not, cause its not enough, you still need to nuke a few times then throw him into the sun, then nuke the sun.

or alternatively, send Wolverine back in time to the big bang.

[Xondoure]

Even that is not enough, Wolverine's power functions to the need of plot. Thus, his plot armor is invincible. If you wanted to permanently stop him, you could always throw him into the negative zone or Limbo for a while.

[Worira]

Stab in eye with giant syringe. Suck out brain. Inject brain into blender full of acid.

[Trizap]

Stab in eye with giant syringe. Suck out brain. Inject brain into blender full of acid.

...........then nuke it, throw it into the sun, nuke the sun, and throw whatever remains into the big bang in the past!

[Jamin]

Slowly and painfully

[Worira]

...........then nuke it, throw it into the sun, nuke the sun, and throw whatever remains into the big bang in the past!

Nah, the blender full of acid should do.

[Avilan the Grey]

First question is "which Wolverine"?

Normal Wolverine or "Ultimate" Wolverine?

[Trizap]

Nah, the blender full of acid should do.

yea, with nukes and suns

[Worira]

Uh, no. With acid and sharp spinning things.

[chiasaur11]

Have Squirrel Girl do it.

If she won't, as Wolverine isn't a bad guy and heroes don't kill, calmly accept it and later, slip Rex the Wonderdog a fiver to make it look like an accident.

If both options are unavailable, one remains. Be Herbie Popnecker.

[Serenity]

First off, taking away the adamantium is a bad idea. When Magneto did that, Wolverine's healing factor increased exponentially, because it was no longer occupied with keeping him alive in spite of the metal grafted to his bones.

So chamber up a gun with lots and lots of adamantium bullets, and shoot until you run out. Focus fire on the head--damage to the brain will screw him up, even if he can recover from it. Once the barrage has got him down, take an adamantium or energy sword and cut his head off. Throw that into a barrel of acid, and seal it. Throw his body into the ocean, where the adamantium will cause it to sink fast. In fact, chop it up and throw it in in pieces.

[Ravens_cry]

Lure Logan into a room, a few mooks should do it and using six super strong electromagnets at each corner of an axis, hold him balanced between the opposing forces. Then drop him in a big old tub of adamantine, using two of the magnets to hold him in place vertically. Once done, close the lid on the tub, tub and lid should pre-set admantine of course, then let the adamantine set, holding Logan in place with the magnets, pulsing them so that molten admantine can maintain contact with Logans outer surface. Basically what we are going for is "Han Solo in Carbonite", only with no protruding face. Then, we simply keep the box heated to some temperature that can melt steel. If you can succeed at all these steps, you have effectively neutralized Wolverine. He can not cut his way out as adamantine, unlike other materials, can't cut itself. And even if it could, he has no leverage as he is sealed tight. And furthermore, the box is heated, keeping his healing factor at work 24/7. I presented this plan before, modified as I realized if magnetic fields could keep Logan spread eagle and constrained, they would also affect the molten adamantine been used as the the building material of his prison.

[Trizap]

Uh, no. With acid and sharp spinning things.

and after that, nukes and suns.

[ImmortalAer]

...wouldn't the simplest way possible to kill him, is just drowning him? You can't "regenerate" air. So, just hold him face first in a flooded toliet for a hour or two for good measure, then cut some skin away to see if he's still alive. If so, keep him down.

And then dump the body in the ocean, just to make sure. He regenerates, not breathes water like a fish. A few dozen cinder blocks could be included for insurance.

[Megatron46]

Excellent,

Mwaaa haaa haaa haaa

Now you have all proven yourselves as masters of killing the unkillable! Now is the real point of this thread!

How the hell do you get Optimus Prime to stay dead? He just keeps coming back damnit!

[ImmortalAer]

Excellent,

Mwaaa haaa haaa haaa

Now you have all proven yourselves as masters of killing the unkillable! Now is the real point of this thread!

How the hell do you get Optimus Prime to stay dead? He just keeps coming back damnit!

Unfortunately, Prime is invunerable, having escaped every possible death in the old shows, and is now unkillable/unhurtable in the new one.

Does anyone know where to pick up the first 1 - 3 seasons of Beasties?

[Green Bean]

Does anyone know where to pick up the first 1 - 3 seasons of Beasties?

Ah, there's Optimus' true vulnerability; sales figures.

[Avilan the Grey]

...wouldn't the simplest way possible to kill him, is just drowning him? You can't "regenerate" air. So, just hold him face first in a flooded toliet for a hour or two for good measure, then cut some skin away to see if he's still alive. If so, keep him down.

And then dump the body in the ocean, just to make sure. He regenerates, not breathes water like a fish. A few dozen cinder blocks could be included for insurance.

That's why I want to know which Wolverine.
Ultimate Wolverine (From the Ultimate series) does not know how immortal he is until his fight with the Hulk:

It turns out he has misunderstood his powers: He has no "Healing Factor"; his "healing" powers are simply the "Power to Survive at all costs (ultra-adaptable body)".
He himself is very surprised when Nick Fury cuts his head off, and keeps it on a table (during their conversation):
It turns out his cells quickly adapted to absorb oxygen through the skin (among other things) so that it could breathe without lungs. In that discussion it is suggested by Fury that if they launched Logan into space his body would just turn off until it found livable conditions again.

[TSED]

Simple: tell the CEO of Marvel that Wolverine is costing them sales, and get a high bluff check on it.



Bam. He'd be dead forever in a month.

[charl]

Carbodinium synthesizer to make lots of bullets out of... well carbodinium, then assault helicopter with Gatling gun. Good buy healing factor.

Or somehow steal that magic katana sword thingie that supposedly can kill him.

EDIT: It also occurs to me that dropping him into the Mariana Trench should do the trick. His bones are covered with metal, so he's gonna sink (you could just add some weight otherwise). He can't generate when the pressure compresses his body into the size of a grape.

[Weiser_Cain]

Make him black, eventually he'll be killed by a sabeetooth clone wielding the simulated power cosmic and a large trout.

[Belial_the_Leveler]

Most Marvel superheroes have mutation-based powers, right?

1st attempt:
Step 1: Syringe full of proteolytic enzymes.
Step 2: Load dart gun.
Step 3: Shoot Wolverine.
Step 4: All his proteins, including his DNA, dissolve into goo. Now his powers cease functioning and he dies.

2nd attempt:
Step 1: Big Magnet.
Step 2: Cool Wolverine down thoroughly.
Step 3: His metabolism stops due to hypothermia. This is not damage of the body; biological processes simply can't happen without specific temperatures.
Step 4: Irradiate until his DNA is totally fried. If he didn't die at step 3, he dies now.


The above attempts are fully doable with current RL technology BTW.