Admiral Euphoria's Random Banter Thread of Delusional Grandeur #124

[Player_Zero]

*High fives self*
Way to go, last day of work!
Then... I have to write a research paper.
Ah... dash it all.

Write it about clams, the mystery of the ocean.

[bosssmiley]

Write it about clams, the mystery of the ocean.

Cagey little b*st*rds them. Not to be trusted. They can summon storms you know. This is why our ancestors waged a relentless war on their deliciousness, killing and devouring them for centuries. The lemon was our greatest ally in the war on clams.

@D'anna Biers: Hey, where ya been?

ION: ~ There is a passionate affair going on between Kirk and the mountain ~ (brainworm warning)

Charity at his weekly lemon disdaining:

Spoiler

Show

[Charity]

Or so you clam Bossman, anyone willing to ally themselves with 'the devil made fruit' is clearly suspicious at best, I bet you're one of them clams advisers I keep hearing about.

[Player_Zero]

You cryptofascists know nothing of the plight of the clams.

[DraPrime]

You cryptofascists know nothing of the plight of the clams.

A clam lover! Get him!

[Player_Zero]

This is my topic of conversation and I'll be damned if you'll turn it against me!

[DraPrime]

This is my topic of conversation and I'll be damned if you'll turn it against me!

It is you who has turned against us! You have betrayed your people for the hated clams.

*casts Summon Torch-Wielding Mob III*

Get him!

[CurlyKitGirl]

I sowwy.
^.^ No fancy dress or waltzing involved, sorry to disappoint. ;P

Aha! But you were with Exy on the moon, aka Phase. What's the moon like?

Also: remember your needle phobia with the fainting and all that?

I have it too.
Went in for a blood test, and every moment of it was catastrophic.
Where do I start . . . ?
How about the arrival.
I waited for ten minutes, got into the room and held out my left arm as y'do for the Phlebotomist to take my blood like the evil vampire woman that she is.
Left arm . . . apparently it has no veins because she found none.
So she tried the right arm and found exactly one very fine vein. She used a thin needle to do the whole stabbing thing.
She filled up one phial and I felt a bit nauseous, but hey, I can deal with that. It's only a needle after all. Right.
I almost fainted; I got the whole dizziness, ears humming, oh gods I'm going to through up; hey, my vision's going blurry and dark. This is bad.
So I said, quite thickly actually, "I think I'm going to faint." I had to fight to stay conscious while the second phial filled up agonisingly slowly, my head was bobbing up at down and I was gasping and breaking out in a sweat. This made the Phlebotomist panic enough to call for the nurse to come help the very moment she'd filled up the phial.
She also almost forgot to put the little cotton wool bud on the vein so I was bleeding through the cotton wool as my grip was abomibable due to the whole: "I'm going to faint." crisis.
I had to lie down on the bed for ten minutes and they were really worried. I mean, really worried. Not enough to send me hospital, but enough to hover over me like petrified parents, putting wet cloths on my forehead and get me drinks and things. And they arranged for one of the staff to take me home because I was absolutely certain I couldn't make my own way home. I walked and had no money.
And when I got home I was mocked by my mother. This rapidly changed to concern when I stood up to get a drink and had to sit down again because I felt faint again.

As a result I'm on light duties at home and at my surgery I'm down on their note thing as Must Lie Down When Having Blood Tests.
The ironic thing is the Phlebotomist said, "It won't hurt anything as much as a normal vaccination."
And I bled through three plasters before the blood slowed down.

I hate blood tests. Really truly now.

[Kaelaroth]

I hate waking up late.

Say goodbye to passage of regular meals. Breakfast must go, as otherwise lunch becomes meaningless, lost either in tiny portions, as breakfast fills the belly, or obsolete entirely. So no breakfast - meaning your day begins with lunch!
Savoury tastes! And, then, of course, sugar cravings kick in. Stupid sugar.

And there's that lingering lethargy that comes from just having woken up that now stretches deep into the afternoon - which is bloody tiresome, considering it means that nothing gets done till most people are having what's known as tea!

And as for the body-clock? It's awful! AWFUL! When, now, should I be sleeping? In the evenings, sure, that's when I ought to be sleeping, but it feels ever so much earlier than it really is, so I can't sleep, or forget I should be sleeping, and so the whole darned cycle starts again!

AGAIN, I tell you!

[Player_Zero]

Two vials? You lightweight! I gave 'em six and I was still raring to go. This was some time ago, mind.

And Kael, I woke up at 4AM, and then previously various times in the evening for the past few weeks. I also had a curry for breakfast this morning.

In short, you people need to be more like me. That'll solve your problems.

[Kaelaroth]

And Kael, I woke up at 4AM, and then previously various times in the evening for the past few weeks. I also had a curry for breakfast this morning.

Mm. I haven't had a good curry in aaaaages.
And, no, I need my regular sleep pattern, damnit! I miss seeing people before they've gone to their stupid jobs!

[Player_Zero]

That's the benefit of staying in your room and talking to no one. Thwarts snipers too.

[CurlyKitGirl]

Two vials? You lightweight! I gave 'em six and I was still raring to go. This was some time ago, mind.

But was it giving blood or a blood test? Also: you're crazy. You probably have eight hearts or something so it's no wonder you can give insane amounts of blood.

@Kaela: Ah, the summer body clock. You'll get used to it; going to bed at three in the morning, up at eight . . .
I find the best way to cure a screwed up body clock is to pull an all nighter, then go to bed at your normal time. Warning: you may be overtired, so perhaps go to bed slightly earlier than you normally would.
I will say one thing for the hours of three and four a.m.: it's very peaceful.

[Nano]

That's the benefit of staying in your room and talking to no one. Thwarts snipers too.

Heh. Amateurs, maybe.

[Player_Zero]

But was it giving blood or a blood test? Also: you're crazy. You probably have eight hearts or something so it's no wonder you can give insane amounts of blood.

You have way more blood than you think and can make enough so that taking any less than two litres will be refilled momentarily.

Heh. Amateurs, maybe.

Curtains closed, deadly cat on guard. My room is a fortress! Nay, an island!

Deadly cat may look asleep, of course.

[Kaelaroth]

@Kaela: Ah, the summer body clock. You'll get used to it; going to bed at three in the morning, up at eight . . .
I find the best way to cure a screwed up body clock is to pull an all nighter, then go to bed at your normal time. Warning: you may be overtired, so perhaps go to bed slightly earlier than you normally would.
I will say one thing for the hours of three and four a.m.: it's very peaceful.

Or I could psychotically tire myself out, and then wake up tomorrow early and grouchy!

[CurlyKitGirl]

You have way more blood than you think and can make enough so that taking any less than two litres will be refilled momentarily.

Unless you happen to be Curly KitGirl aka Koorly aka a flippin' Goddess/Lovecraftian monster out to destroy the world because she's bored and ran out of books to read.

Curtains closed, deadly cat on guard. My room is a fortress! Nay, an island!

Deadly cat may look asleep, of course.

All cats are deadly. And sleep with possibly one eye open at all time.
Deadly guard cat is good and sensible.

[bosssmiley]

Aha! But you were with Exy on the moon, aka Phase. What's the moon like?

Also: remember your needle phobia with the fainting and all that?

I have it too.
Went in for a blood test, and every moment of it was catastrophic.
<blood test grief trimmed>
I hate blood tests. Really truly now.

What CKG does not tell us is that she bled nothing but tapoica the whole time. People from the south-west are funny that way, it comes of their ancestors living in deep holes in the ground for generations.

[Cyrano]

@D'anna Biers: Hey, where ya been?

NASA.

Also at Rutskarn's previous bro-out: I don't respect you anymore.

Also at clams: Cephalopods? Better.

Also at bleeding tapioca: there must be some negative side effects to having veins full of roe.

Also if Rutskarn comes in here and goes "Veins full of BROE my maan" I am gonna hit something, fair warning.

[Phase]

NASA? Aww, were you trying to visit me in my loneliness up here?

Also, listening to the soundtrack has made me want to re-play Bioshock, if only for Fort Frolic.

[Cyrano]

NASA? Aww, were you trying to visit me in my loneliness up here?

You are an uninteresting lump of stellar concrete. I'm going ta Alpha Centauri, to find more interesting lumps of stellar concrete.

[Phase]

You are an uninteresting lump of stellar concrete. I'm going ta Alpha Centauri, to find more interesting lumps of stellar concrete.

You wound me in my rocky lack of a soul. I would bleed if that wouldn't be really creepy cause I don't have blood.

[Cyrano]

You wound me in my rocky lack of a soul. I would bleed if that wouldn't be really creepy cause I don't have blood.

This is all just an elaborate scheme to get you to admit that you're no moon.

P.S. If anyone goes Akbar on me I am going to cry.

[Player_Zero]

You are an uninteresting lump of stellar concrete. I'm going ta Alpha Centauri, to find more interesting lumps of stellar concrete.

Wouldn't go there if I was you. It'd be nothing but drone riots and mind worms.

[Cyrano]

Wouldn't go there if I was you. It'd be nothing but drone riots and mind worms.

Drone riots? You're trying to dissuade me with drone riots? Clearly you don't understand whose side I'm on.

[Cristo Meyers]

Wouldn't go there if I was you. It'd be nothing but drone riots and mind worms.

Yeah, but a couple of nerve staplings can solve the rioting...

...the mind worms, though...those are a bit of a bore...

[Phase]

...the mind worms, though...those are a bit of a bore...

You're terrible.

[CurlyKitGirl]

What CKG does not tell us is that she bled nothing but tapoica the whole time. People from the south-west are funny that way, it comes of their ancestors living in deep holes in the ground for generations.

Lies! Lies and slander! Slander and lies!
>.>
<.<
It was cider.
None of that poncy Oop Northern tapioca for us; it's cider, pasties, fish and cider all the way.

[Player_Zero]

Yeah, but a couple of nerve staplings can solve the rioting...

...the mind worms, though...those are a bit of a bore...

You should be castrated for that one.

[Thufir]

Lies! Lies and slander! Slander and lies!
>.>
<.<
It was cider.
None of that poncy Oop Northern tapioca for us; it's cider, pasties, fish and cider all the way.

And you've consumed it in such quantities that cider has replaced your blood?!
Has Curly secretly been binge drinking?