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  1. - Top - End - #1
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Hey everyone,

    I'm looking for some thoughts on the most creative (and effective) way to kill of an unsuspecting party member, and not necessarily as a godly DM. If there was someone in the party you absolutely hated and wanted to off, how would you go about doing it?

    Keep in mind that there are 2-3 other party members and you can only get the help of one of them. I'm looking for methods using poisons, traps, stealth ambushes, or plain old hilarious ways to die. The end goal: find the most indisputable way so that the person has no alternative but to say "Well, you got me! Time to re-roll."

    EDIT:
    This isn't meant to be spiteful or bastardly. I have a player who wants to transition to another character he rolled up and likes better. I just wanted a better way to remove the "old" character that isn't as boring as just walking away, never to be seen again.
    Last edited by SilverSlasher; 2009-08-18 at 08:12 AM.

  2. - Top - End - #2
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Signmaker's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Ghost Template. Possession. Seppuku.
    "So Marbles, why do they call you Marbles?"

  3. - Top - End - #3
    Troll in the Playground
     
    Zombie

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    "Hand me your character sheet. Rocks fall, you die." Then light the sheet on fire.

    Not sure why you'd want to play with a DM that does that though. Frankly, if my DM did that I'd pummel him.
    Me: I'd get the paladin to help, but we might end up with a kid that believes in fairy tales.
    DM: aye, and it's not like she's been saved by a mysterious little girl and a band of real live puppets from a bad man and worse step-sister to go live with the faries in the happy land.
    Me: Yeah, a knight in shining armour might just bring her over the edge.

  4. - Top - End - #4
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Keld Denar's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Just adventure until the person is near a cliff, then...bullrush him off? Make sure its a high cliff. Above spikes. And make sure those spikes have spikes on them. And those spikes are on fire. And those fires are made up of smaller fires which burn.

    And then go look up Saph's rules of D&D. Follow rule 1. If you don't like rule 1, consult rule 2.
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  5. - Top - End - #5
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Any DM can kill and PC at any time.

    I mean, you could have an epic level Arcane Archer fire a bane disintegrate seeker death arrow from literally several continents away, if you wanted. I'm just not sure why you'd want to.

  6. - Top - End - #6
    Troll in the Playground
     
    NEO|Phyte's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Take a night watch, Coup de Grace the weenie with the most critacular weapon you have that won't be obviously linked to you. Loot the guy if it tickles your fancy, take some of the now-available blood, make a bloody mess of the camp, get out of sight of the camp, scream bloody murder until you hear the others waking up, then head for the nearest town.
    Man this thing was full of outdated stuff.
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    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    NinjaGuy

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Coup de Grace while the party is sleeping. If you can silence the Coup de Gracer, even better. No one will even hear the struggle. Anyone with a good str score and a x3 or x4 weapon works well. A cleric with 14 str, and a spear. Cast Bull's Strength, Cast Silence. Both 2nd level spells, so this can be done at level 3. An effective +4 Str bonus w/ a 2H weapon, automatic x3 Crit.

    3d8+18 damage, averaging 31.5 damage. If that doesn't kill him, the DC ~41 fort save will.

    EDIT: NINJAS.
    Last edited by mcl01; 2009-08-17 at 07:07 PM.

  8. - Top - End - #8
    Dwarf in the Playground
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Poisoned seat cushions! If it works in 40k, it can work in D&D.

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    Pixie in the Playground
     
    PaladinGuy

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Sorry for asking it this way, but this seems pretty low to me...

    Is it the character itself or the player? If it's the former, then you need to check if this type of character is the norm for that player (whether you like them or not).

    If it is the latter, or the player usually makes these types of characters, you need to be less passive-aggresive about dealing with the problem. Killing off someone who's a regular member of your group because you don't like their playstyle or who they are won't fix it and they'll just make another character who's similar and the problem will repeat itself endlessly until there's a massive drama-splosion.

    If it's just the character (and not the player) that is a problem, may I ask why? Is it an OP power combo? Too strong a weapon? Just not a fit to the campaign (A "ca-razy" CN character in a campaign about justice and law). If this is the case, have you tried talking to them about it and they are adamant on not changing? If so, becareful... because the player might see through your "clever ruse" in that you were singling them out and (rightfully?) throw a hissy fit about it.

  10. - Top - End - #10
    Barbarian in the Playground
     
    BenTheJester's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by NEO|Phyte View Post
    Take a night watch, Coup de Grace the weenie with the most critacular weapon you have that won't be obviously linked to you. Loot the guy if it tickles your fancy, take some of the now-available blood, make a bloody mess of the camp, get out of sight of the camp, scream bloody murder until you hear the others waking up, then head for the nearest town.
    that sucks, that's most easy way to do it.

    from what I can see, he wants a funny way to kill him.

  11. - Top - End - #11
    Ogre in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by Kaziel View Post
    Sorry for asking it this way, but this seems pretty low to me...

    Is it the character itself or the player? If it's the former, then you need to check if this type of character is the norm for that player (whether you like them or not).

    If it is the latter, or the player usually makes these types of characters, you need to be less passive-aggresive about dealing with the problem. Killing off someone who's a regular member of your group because you don't like their playstyle or who they are won't fix it and they'll just make another character who's similar and the problem will repeat itself endlessly until there's a massive drama-splosion.

    If it's just the character (and not the player) that is a problem, may I ask why? Is it an OP power combo? Too strong a weapon? Just not a fit to the campaign (A "ca-razy" CN character in a campaign about justice and law). If this is the case, have you tried talking to them about it and they are adamant on not changing? If so, becareful... because the player might see through your "clever ruse" in that you were singling them out and (rightfully?) throw a hissy fit about it.
    You ninja'd the words right out of my mouth. On the other hand, poisoned seat cushions is a good idea...
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  12. - Top - End - #12
    Colossus in the Playground
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Be a Frenzied Berserker. Carry acid flasks that might break while travelling around. Have a relatively poor Will-save. Travel near the guy you want dead. Nature will take care of the rest.
    Last edited by Eldariel; 2009-08-17 at 07:16 PM.
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  13. - Top - End - #13
    Bugbear in the Playground
     
    Kizara's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by Eldariel View Post
    Be a Frenzied Berserker. Carry acid flasks that might break while travelling around. Have a relatively poor Will-save. Travel near the guy you want dead. Nature will take care of the rest.
    So awesome and so true.

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    Frank: Hey look a dragon! *RAAAWRG!!* *Splats Steve*

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  14. - Top - End - #14
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    FMArthur's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Polymorph -> Swallow Whole.

    Hilarious.
    • Chameleon Base Class [3.5]/[PF]: A versatile, morphic class that mimics one basic party role (warrior, caster, sneak, etc) at a time. If you find yourself getting bored of any class you play too long, the Chameleon is for you!
    • Warlock Power Sources [3.5]: Making Hellfire Warlock part of the base class and providing other similar options for Warlocks whose powers don't come from devils.

  15. - Top - End - #15
    Ogre in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    I was always a fan of a paralytic, dousing them in oil, and just burning until nothing is left. Smelly, yes, but not so messy if you do it right.
    Life is a gamble, roll the dice. If your life is like cards, rig the deck.

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  16. - Top - End - #16
    Titan in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by Seffbasilisk View Post
    I was always a fan of a paralytic, dousing them in oil, and just burning until nothing is left. Smelly, yes, but not so messy if you do it right.
    But how do I get the grease splatters out of my carpet? And the smell of burnt meat and hair, ugh, that's not going away. Fabreze can only do so much!
    Jokes aside, this is dumb. Stupid even. Small minded and infantile. If you have a problem with the character or the player, or something they did, discuss it with the player. Don't go on some immature DM power trip unless you want to be on the fast track to the the realm of Worst DM. It doesn't help, and it only makes you look like a jerk. There are other ways of dealing with these kinds of issues then being a twit.
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  17. - Top - End - #17
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    TheCountAlucard's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Be resistant to fire. Binder works, with the right vestiges, as does starting out as a Tiefling. Being decent at grappling helps, too.

    Light yourself on fire.

    Grapple your target.

  18. - Top - End - #18
    Banned
     
    Harperfan7's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by FMArthur View Post
    Polymorph -> Swallow Whole.

    Hilarious.
    Indeed sir.

    But seriously, unless it's part of the story and NOT a punishment, this is retarded.

    If it is part of the story and not a punishment, then literally, what's better than a buffed up sniper assassin (as in, the pretige class)? All the pcs will know is that an arrow flew out of nowhere and all the sudden steve is dead.

  19. - Top - End - #19
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Keld Denar's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Once again, I refer you to Saph's rules of the game.

    Rule 1: Don't be a douche
    Rule 2: When in doubt? See rule 1.

    Everything else is just details.
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    _________________________________
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  20. - Top - End - #20
    Ogre in the Playground
     
    FMArthur's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Wait, is this for use application in a real game? My suggestion doesn't work, then. Most things are immune to being eaten. The best method of assassination is certainly to bind your limbs and make a big show of being helpless at your enemy's feat.
    • Chameleon Base Class [3.5]/[PF]: A versatile, morphic class that mimics one basic party role (warrior, caster, sneak, etc) at a time. If you find yourself getting bored of any class you play too long, the Chameleon is for you!
    • Warlock Power Sources [3.5]: Making Hellfire Warlock part of the base class and providing other similar options for Warlocks whose powers don't come from devils.

  21. - Top - End - #21
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    I've got a problem player of my own (he plays a scout/ranger named Sephiroth ). Here is my (now shelved) plan to kill him. My character is a halfling Beguiler 5/Mindbender 4 by the by.

    Step 1: Charm a relatively powerful evil creature (mine is a Juvenile red dragon).

    Step 2: Get the problem character next to the dragon.

    Step 3: Cast Glibness. If a party member ask what's going on, tell him it's a buff of one kind or another. With a Bluff modifier of +45, he should buy it.

    Step 4: Cast Hold Person. Works best if he has a terrible will save (it makes it even easier if you *rebuilt* the dummy's character because he can't read the BAB prereq for Arcane Archer )

    Step 5: Telepathically tell the dragon to Coup de Grace Idiot McIdioterson.

    Step 6: Once the party inevitably gets pissy at you/your minion, defuse the situation with 80 - 100 minutes of Glibness. Explain that your poor dragon hasn't eaten in days and the elf mortally offended some of his dragon sensibilities. If the party asks for details, make stuff up. It'll be fun!

    Step 7: Convince the party not to have him raised (it helps to be dating the party druid).

    Step 8: Celebrate!
    Last edited by Raewyn; 2009-08-18 at 11:54 AM.

  22. - Top - End - #22
    Firbolg in the Playground
     
    erikun's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by Raewyn View Post
    Step 7: Convince the party not to have him raised (it helps to be dating the party druid).
    Better yet, have him reincarnated. Repeat steps 1-6 if the reincarnation isn't humilliating enough.

  23. - Top - End - #23
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by erikun View Post
    Better yet, have him reincarnated. Repeat steps 1-6 if the reincarnation isn't humilliating enough.
    Fair 'nough. This plan was back when his character was awful (Scout 6/Wizard 1/Arcane Archer 2; he actually didn't have enough BAB to run it) and I was hoping that the party not wanting to have him raised (no one else really likes him either) and the druid refusing to sacrifice XP for Reincarnate (he has a Vow of Poverty) would force him to reroll. Now that his character build doesn't suck, I'm actually trying to deal with him as a person (which is harder than it sounds).

  24. - Top - End - #24
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    A response to some of the replies posted:
    This isn't meant to be spiteful or bastardly. I have a player who wants to transition to another character he rolled up and likes better. I just wanted a better way to remove the "old" character that isn't as boring as just walking away, never to be seen again.

    Isn't it better to have an old character die in an epic fashion? Sort of like a last farewell.

  25. - Top - End - #25
    Titan in the Playground
     
    Telonius's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Ah, so you want him to go out with a bang. What class is he? If he's a spellcaster, it'll be a little easier. Super-powerful bad guys approach. Cast Hypnotic Pattern, which (amazingly) functions. "I'll hold them off. Go!"

  26. - Top - End - #26
    Pixie in the Playground
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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Quote Originally Posted by Telonius View Post
    Ah, so you want him to go out with a bang. What class is he? If he's a spellcaster, it'll be a little easier. Super-powerful bad guys approach. Cast Hypnotic Pattern, which (amazingly) functions. "I'll hold them off. Go!"
    Well, not necessarily a bang. It could be a "splorch!". The character is a human ranger 6/longwoods sniper 6 so they really like making pincushions out of targets.

  27. - Top - End - #27
    Troll in the Playground
     
    SamuraiGuy

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    You could give him a cursed item that takes over his personality and makes him into an NPC. Then, if you want, it could make him into a super powerful bad guy and part of the team's new quest could be freeing him from the curse or killing him. Have him take the sword (or whatever) glow with power, start cackling, drop a couple blasphemies or contagions then teleport away.
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  28. - Top - End - #28
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    Farlion's Avatar

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    If he wants to go, give him a heroic death! A death the party will still talk about in 3 years!

    Have him hold off hundereds of enemies, while the rest of the party flees.

    Have him jump on a dragons back and be taken high above the clouds. The last thing the party sees, is a dead dragon dropping to the floor some 10 miles away!

    Have him distract a large foe and run off with it into the woods, away from the party.

    Have him sacrifice his soul to an evil lich, killing the lich (and himself) but saving the party!


    Heroic deaths are awesome! Talk to your player, find a way to give him a cue, when it's his time to go. Then just make his death as awesome as you can!

    Cheers,
    Farlion

  29. - Top - End - #29
    Dwarf in the Playground
     
    WolfInSheepsClothing

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    tongue Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Step 1) Hog-Tie individual in their sleep! (Dont forget the gag! ^_^d)
    *Bonus points if its a silence spell centered on them.
    Step 2) Grab yourself a portable hole (For the low price of 20k!)
    *On the cheap end a bag of holding might do fine.
    Step 3) Insert individual into said extra-dimensional space, count to 601
    *You now have an unconscious piece of meat at your disposal
    Step 4) Now you have 2 options, you can wait another 300 seconds until his brain is deprived of oxygen long enough to be a vegetable or you can screw with his head.
    *Personally Id go with option 4.5
    Step 4.5) Tie him up to some heavy rope behind your newly bought carriage pulled by 4 warhorses. Give about 10-15 ft of rope lead, and proceed to drag him behind the carriage going 30+ mph, while watching the road or lack there of peal off his skin.
    *Wouldn't that be fun to wake up too.
    Step 5) Ask the party druid to heal him every-so often so that this fun time can last EVEN LONGER! (He will thank you later? :p )

    ???Profit???

    ^_^d

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    Default Re: An Open Challenge - Assassination

    Portable hole + bag of holding. Do it in his sleep. Or make a trap with it.

    Sovereign glue. So many applications. Like glueing him to the Tarrasque and setting it on fire. Or glueing his mouth and nose together.

    Illithids. You can't go wrong with Illithids.

    Sphere of Annihilation. You know what to do.

    Ring of three wishes. Cue the fire.

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